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Can our vices keep us single?

We all have our vices, habits that we probably should drop…like a bad habit, but is it possible these habits are driving away potential dates?

Listen, none of us are without flaws, but do you think it’s worth it to reevaluate the things we are clinging tightly to?

If you met someone great and they felt as if one of your habits was a real problem, would you consider how they feel, especially if it could be good for you?

Have you ever given up a vice or bad habit because you were in love?

Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Blog

313 comments Add your comment

2CPTG© - "that dude from da innanet"

November 17th, 2010
8:07 am

g’morning….

“Have you ever given up a vice or bad habit because you were in love?” —–nope…but, because “I became a man, and put away childish things…”

I am whatever you say I am

November 17th, 2010
8:24 am

If I were to give up a vice, I would probably be a prude.
I love sex!

Fion

November 17th, 2010
8:24 am

“If you met someone great and they felt as if one of your habits was a real problem”
……ok, ok! You’re right. Maybe the Cowboy boots and spurs were a little over the top in bed. But I’m still gonna wear the mask!

2CPTG© - "that dude from da innanet"

November 17th, 2010
8:30 am

Fion, don’t stop, lil mama! I’on know bout cowboy boots, but lawd, the first time a chic wore stilletoes to bed……I damn near lost my mind……that sh i.t. was so sexy…..

Simple Man!!!!!

November 17th, 2010
8:35 am

Morning Folks…..I am loves sex….. Fion is all about sexy shoes in bed….Today has the potential to be HOT!!!!

What it do 2can????

Fion

November 17th, 2010
8:35 am

@ 2C Yo! Cat. For the record, my system is runnin on testosterone.

2CPTG© - "that dude from da innanet"

November 17th, 2010
8:40 am

what up, Simple Man….

Kym

November 17th, 2010
8:40 am

Good Morning All,

I was thinking of vices as like bad habits like smoking or drinking too much, drugs..that sort of thing. I wouldn’t think being sexually “over the top as a vice”..I mean I guess it could be. Hmmm other than being “defensive ” I can’t really think of a vice I have..and seriously I think that is more of a character flaw than a vice. I am gonna lurk around on this one.

John

November 17th, 2010
8:40 am

From the older generation: I quit dating an otherwise very nice woman because she just smoked too much pot. As a college student in the 60’s I had seen a bit of pot smoking before and didn’t want to be around it all the time. I quit dating another otherwise very nice woman because I didn’t like the cigarette breath that her “only one or two cigarettes a day” gave her.

I am whatever you say I am

November 17th, 2010
8:40 am

I am whatever you say I am

November 17th, 2010
8:42 am

Sex to me is a vice… I need it A LOT
Have yet to meet anyone that can keep up. Yep, it’s a vice because whether I’m mad, sad,happy, or just bored… I want it and I need it.
Scorpio trait. Sometimes, it affects relationships.

I am whatever you say I am

November 17th, 2010
8:43 am

John, I’ve dumped a guy before for smoking too much pot as well.
He makes Cheech and Chong look like monks.

I am whatever you say I am

November 17th, 2010
8:43 am

Sup Simple dude!

Jay

November 17th, 2010
8:45 am

Smart women know this: any man (married or single) is always his number one concern. He may give up a vice for you, but this will be only temporary.Forget romance. Think about what’s in the relationship for you, and you’ll be a happier person for it. Think of the old joke about the man who was treated for a brain tumor. He had to have his penis removed.

blue®

November 17th, 2010
8:45 am

Morning people…yawwwnnn…this morning thing is sooo overrated…
lets see vices….i dont smoke – anything, didnt start drinking till i got married and even thats rare, dont hire red light ladies (or men)….not sure what vice ive got, lol. now what some consider undesirable personality traits, thats a different story ;)

Brian

November 17th, 2010
8:47 am

Sex can be a huge vice.. actually in the south dating gets to be a joke b/c you have women in their mid 20’s “waiting” to see if you are the one.. very 1950’s.. But then again, you have to watch the girls you date!

I am whatever you say I am

November 17th, 2010
8:52 am

From what I have been told by the men, it’s the waiting to see if you’re the one issue- rarely do they encounter them
What irks the hell out of them is women that treat them like a walking ATM machine and women that won’t date them because of the car they drive, net worth, etc…
I hope these women keep acting the way the do, because it makes women like me who are not like that a rare gem that men adore when they get the opportunity to date me :-)

Fion

November 17th, 2010
8:52 am

“I wouldn’t think being sexually “over the top as a vice”..
For some, Sexual Appetite can definitely be a deal breaker.

Brian

November 17th, 2010
8:57 am

I am thinking there are a lot of money grubbers in Atlanta. I went to the Hawks game Friday night and was sitting on the court, and it was a who who of great looking women with very UGLY and OLD guys.. I am sure they have great personalities, oh ya, and make great life preservers as the girls seem to be holding on tight waiting for Noah and the Arc to come through

Sweet Pea

November 17th, 2010
8:57 am

Good Morning,

Vices can keep you single if you are unwilling to change, however it depends on what the vices are that determines such…Example: A guy I recently dated would be so critical of others and felt as though he was flawless, however I brought some things to his attention and his response was his family told him the same thing and they are some things that he is aware of that he needs to change. Well, at 46yo you are who you are and will be stuck in your ways at this age so guess what?? Someone of this mindset will remain single unless they get someone who will tolerate it….A heck of a lot of tolerance!

As for myself, If there are some things that need changing that the other half recognize that’s sensible and not one trying to control me then it’s doable.

Thirdwheel

November 17th, 2010
9:10 am

Good Morning Everyone!! My vice is I like a lot of alone time by myself and I am a clean freak. Sorry if I like using a clean toilet but I have found some guys have a problem with that… Plus I like bathing on a daily basis… Some guys feel they should bathe once a week…

Buffalo Guy

November 17th, 2010
9:15 am

My vice is too high expectations..a girl to say, ” Yes, dear, whatever you say dear, you’re absolutely right dear”. Or when I get home from golf, ” Let me clean those clubs for you “. Or, if somebody asks her what she thinks, she turns to me and says, ” what do I think about that, dear “. Is this too much to ask ?

Simple Man!!!!!

November 17th, 2010
9:15 am

3rdwheel…Those are some nasty ass dudes!!! Hope they are not pushing to do the Nasty while they are BEING Nasty!!! LOL

granny godzilla

November 17th, 2010
9:16 am

Let’s clean it up.

Thirdwheel

November 17th, 2010
9:17 am

Yeah my current S.O. is always pushing for sex now. I tell him either I am tired or sick…

Kym

November 17th, 2010
9:17 am

Okay how is high expectations a vice? That sounds like as blue put it a ” undesirable personality trait” but that is not a vice. Nor is spending time alone a vice.

Yeah right.

November 17th, 2010
9:17 am

Brian – I think it’s you, dude. They’re not “waiting”; they’re just tired from sleeping with other guys more worth it.

Kym

November 17th, 2010
9:18 am

Granny godzilla..you made your way from the Tucker blog to here?

blue®

November 17th, 2010
9:24 am

@Sweet Pea – I brought some things to his attention and his response was his family told him the same thing and they are some things that he is aware of that he needs to change. – im with you, some things are just matters of opinion, but when you have multiple people telling you you have some serious character flaws, seems to me a mature person does some self examination. to still ignore it at that point, and pull the whole “i dont wanna” deal, yes is your perogative but imo is just ridiculous

blue®

November 17th, 2010
9:24 am

@Sweet Pea – I brought some things to his attention and his response was his family told him the same thing and they are some things that he is aware of that he needs to change. – im with you, some things are just matters of opinion, but when you have multiple people telling you you have some serious character flaws, seems to me a mature person does some self examination. to still ignore it at that point, and pull the whole “i dont wanna” deal, yes is your perogative but imo is just crazy (can you seriously not say rid ic u lous?)

Biggripatl

November 17th, 2010
9:24 am

Vices keep you normal you have to have something to keep your mind right.

Brian

November 17th, 2010
9:27 am

@yeah right. I don’t push the issue. More of anything its a general expectation that if you get in a committed monogamous relationship and truly care and like the person, being a sophomoric prude is a waste of time

Raqi V

November 17th, 2010
9:28 am

One bad habit I had to give up to be in a good healthy relationship was my tendency to over think and analyze every freakin thing. It was truly holding me back.

I have always admitted that I let a few good one slip thru my fingers because of me over thinking. I am just glad that I one day let that go in order to find and hold onto a good one now.

The wheels in my head still turn sometimes but for the most part I let the former go.

Raqi V

November 17th, 2010
9:32 am

One vice I do still have is the ability to get answers out of people. LOL

Sometimes I wish I had just let it go but oh well…

Delight23

November 17th, 2010
9:32 am

Bom dia peoples!

VICE:
an immoral or evil habit or practice.
depraved or degrading behavior
sexual immorality, esp. prostitution.
particular form of depravity

Having said that, I must be peanut butter and jelly plain jane, because I don’t consider just having or wanting sex to be a vice. I’m thinking 2 girls 1 cup would be along the lines of depraved, degrading behavior.

Delight23

November 17th, 2010
9:34 am

Perhaps a confusion exists between what is considered a “bad habit” versus what is a “vice” :?: :?:

evy

November 17th, 2010
9:35 am

mornin, all!

@ 2c: i like your first post, dude
@ buffalo: do let us know if you find her, fella – she may need to be seen to and chemically altered…lobotomy, anyone?
@ sweet pea & blue: yep; reminds me of that old line about how if one man calls you an ass, you can rightly shrug it off and walk away, but if ten men call you an ass, it’s time to check in the mirror…
notes from the big chair:
fion is all man, and that man is part cowboy – yee-ha!
sex is not a vice. i officially position myself thusly. (i can do that cause there’s no web-cam….) lol
money-grubbing is.
a vice is not necessarily a bad thing (work with me here…); it gives us something to aim at.

blue®

November 17th, 2010
9:35 am

ok, thing for me here is this: what exactly are we talking about? are we talking vice (dictionary def: an immoral, wicked, or evil habit, action, or trait ) or are we talking about character flaws/personality traits? for me the main difference is degree, everyone has flaws but to be to the level of “vice” takes it above and beyond, to the point of addictions, law breaking (secular/biblical), and actual evil intent….what exactly are we refering to?

Delight23

November 17th, 2010
9:35 am

I’m not following the posts in relation to today’s topic. Just gonna lurk.

Enjoy you day ladies and gents. :-)

Purple Rain

November 17th, 2010
9:36 am

My vices were porn and weed. I gave up on them both because the wife really did not like them. I missed the weed but not the porn, but now we smoke the weed together occasionally. No need for the porn anymore.

Delight23

November 17th, 2010
9:36 am

blue® 9:35 am DING! DING! DING!

Kym

November 17th, 2010
9:36 am

Well Delight23 I guess a shortcoming or flaw is also consider a vice..I don’t know I am about over webster’s I mean if Sarah Palin can get a word into the dictionary..I mean who is to sa what anything means anymore.

I am whatever you say I am

November 17th, 2010
9:36 am

Peanut butter
Jelly!
Peanut butter
Jelly!
Peanut butter
Jelly!
Peanut butter
Jelly!

Purple Rain

November 17th, 2010
9:38 am

To me a vice is the same as an addiction in meaning.

I am whatever you say I am

November 17th, 2010
9:38 am

“creative” DVD’s have never been an issue with me.
THere were only an issue when they seemed to take over the live of someone I was with but again-I didn’t make a big deal over it.
I don’t get why women don’t like them
I mean if we watch soaps and other girly programming- guys have their “dvd’s” right?

blue®

November 17th, 2010
9:38 am

peanut butter, jelly with a baseball bat!!

evy

November 17th, 2010
9:40 am

@ kym: lol…sarah palin…h’ep me, h’ep me, pleeze!

I am whatever you say I am

November 17th, 2010
9:41 am

Random: If I buy a bottle of bubbly, and vow to keep it around to at least my mid 60’s, do you think it will be worth anything?

evy

November 17th, 2010
9:42 am

@ blue: baseball bat…that reminds me…i gotta see a guy about an overdue installment…is moonlighting as an enforcer for a small-time illegal enterprise a vice?

Sweet Pea

November 17th, 2010
9:43 am

@Blue~imo is just crazy (can you seriously not say rid ic u lous?)

Yes indeed, Can we add Bipolar??? LOL Sadly, he admitted to being a difficult person, however he would be quick to pick others apart as if he was exempt from having any ISSUES of his own.