Getting too comfortable
If you are in a new relationship you probably start to feel comfortable right around the 6-month mark. You relax your look and feel less inclined to impress your mate. I know a lot of times people gain weight because they are happy. When some folks get happy, they eat more and thus begins the process of “letting yourself go”.
Arguably, this relationship phenomenon is a sign of growing closer to each other because you are dropping all the pretense and showing all sides of yourself. When things get too out of hand, though, there can be problems.
What do you do when the person you are involved with has become too comfortable? Is there such a thing in a relationship?
When you are dating someone who has let themselves go or put less energy into their appearance, how do you let them know it’s a problem? Should you let it go so that they won’t get their feelings hurt or a bruised ego?
Would you want to be told that you are letting things slip too much?
accessAtlanta Partner Sites
Sections
Advertise on accessAtlanta.com »
Reach the audience you want by advertising on accessAtlanta.com
Join the Access Atlanta Network »
Advertisers and Publishers, expand your reach by joining the Access Atlanta Network.
Tell us what you think about the site
Visitor Agreement | Privacy Statement | About our ads
© 2013 The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
457 comments Add your comment
i'm swiss™ (but you can call me Mr. Goodnight)
October 8th, 2010
11:53 am
Kym — Whatchu need from youtube, chica? Something like this perhaps?
Raqi
October 8th, 2010
11:54 am
Comfortable in my house is…
Marido: Babe I think I have a hair pimple right here on my thigh right below my butt cheek.
Me: Turn around let me see.
Me: Yeah you do. Hold on let me grab my tweezers.
AmazonRed™
October 8th, 2010
11:54 am
Jumping up and down in an attempt to volunteer my services…!!!!!
This makes me mad uncomfortable right now.
Raqi
October 8th, 2010
11:55 am
If I’m comfortable enough w/ you to tongue your booty
Gouda, dude if he is trying tongue my booty I don’t want his lips or tongue ever again anywhere near my mouth or anything I put near my mouth.
Leggs ™
October 8th, 2010
11:58 am
@i’m swiss, we saw that yesterday…got anything else??
@Raqi ~ I think something like that happens in a lot of households (hold on, let me grag the tweezers).
Kym
October 8th, 2010
11:59 am
No dear I need you to find J Anthony Brown song for Eddie Long….this has had me laughing all morning.
SlimNumeroUno
October 8th, 2010
11:59 am
Well Raqi, I suppose we are on the road to comfortability then because he popped one of mine the other day and I didn’t even ask him to. He was like, are you ready? The BUssss lol
Question ladies: Does it bother you when your SO chooses to sleep on the couch for a night or two? (not including when you all are fighting)
M. (pronouced M dot)
October 8th, 2010
12:00 pm
@Blog
Speaking of being too comfortable…
I have notice some women throwing the word “court” around again like they used to say back in the day.
I have heard some women say I want a guy to court me, I want to be courted, etc.
Question,
If the guy is courting you; what is he getting out of the deal? The potential of being more than friends with you?
SexyCool
October 8th, 2010
12:01 pm
Kym – have you seen the EL Halloween costume picture?
Simple Man!!!
October 8th, 2010
12:01 pm
AmazonRed™
Don’t be…..its all good
AmazonRed™
October 8th, 2010
12:02 pm
If the guy is courting you; what is he getting out of the deal?
My company.
Kym
October 8th, 2010
12:02 pm
@Sexy NOOOO send to me please!
SexyCool
October 8th, 2010
12:03 pm
Random Survey Question – Do you expect to be *invited* to your class reunion?
i'm swiss™ (but you can call me Mr. Goodnight)
October 8th, 2010
12:04 pm
Leggs — Yeah, I know… I just can’t stop laughing at that clip. There’s just something about a crippled getting getting a$$-raped by a shark that’s always funny…
Kym
October 8th, 2010
12:05 pm
@Sexy..invited like formal invite? We had our reunion this year..the committee just told us the price..pay here..show up..period. Some folks came..some didnt….
SexyCool
October 8th, 2010
12:07 pm
Kym – I will have to find it on FB when I get home. It’s a dude in an underarmour shorts and sweat pants striking the bathroom pose.
Kym
October 8th, 2010
12:09 pm
@Sexy ok I think that is going be the costume of choice this Halloween season.
SexyCool
October 8th, 2010
12:11 pm
Kym – Just saw a post where this chick says she’s just learned that she missed the reunion and that she wasn’t invited. I’m like…whatdahell?!? An invite? Nobody was INVITED! Hell, you know yo’ ass been outta school 20years and that we always have the reunion around the high school homecoming. Miss me with them sour grapes. (Yeah, I took it personal….since I was the reunion coordinator. LOL!)
Celisea...reincarnate
October 8th, 2010
12:13 pm
Mdot – If the guy is courting you; what is he getting out of the deal? The potential of being more than friends with you?
I think For Real can answer this. He posted the definiton of courting versus dating a few weeks back. Courting goes further than just hanging out and a light at the end of the tunnel. The opposite of eternal dating. What will you get out of it…she’s hoping a wife
SexyCool
October 8th, 2010
12:13 pm
Oh…and in the picture…the dude is wearing a wig/toupee thingy….
Celisea...reincarnate
October 8th, 2010
12:13 pm
Where’s the candy corn somebody was supplying all week? Nothing today? Awww man….hmph
blue™
October 8th, 2010
12:14 pm
@Sexy/Kym – same here. there was like a broadcast email sent that there was a reunion planning committee, fee was however much, go if you want, but there were no formal invites…
Celisea...reincarnate
October 8th, 2010
12:15 pm
Too, like you said, the closer the date/year you just hope on the website for details. I didn’t get a formal invite either.
Demi
October 8th, 2010
12:15 pm
Gouda, dude if he is trying tongue my booty I don’t want his lips or tongue ever again anywhere near my mouth or anything I put near my mouth.
Raqi a$$ is unclean?
Raqi is no choking-a-Demi
Kym
October 8th, 2010
12:16 pm
@Sexy that sounds like someone with their azz on their shoulders..she needs to get over herself. I mean it’s a 20 year reunion..no one has time to send out formal greetings and such..just come out and celebrate.
Melo!
October 8th, 2010
12:16 pm
Slim?
why is he sleeping on the couch more than two days in a row?
I may fall asleep there while watching tv then head upstairs when I come around! ESP if the porn was that good!
Or when I’m upset!
But I know what u asking. When I want to get in her mind,I’ll sleep down there and shell come down later fetching and asking me’,with a surly look on her face:
Why u sleeping downstairs?!
Me:
@her!
Kym
October 8th, 2010
12:18 pm
Can ya’ll get all your fart/booty/boo talk out before I eat my sugar snack..cause I am gonna need to enjoy this lemon cake with images like that in my head.
Kym
October 8th, 2010
12:18 pm
without images.
i'm swiss™ (but you can call me Mr. Goodnight)
October 8th, 2010
12:19 pm
Raqi
October 8th, 2010
12:24 pm
Slim, I personally don’t see anything wrong with that. I, myself have slept on the couch or in the guestroom and we weren’t fighting. Sometimes he will fall asleep on the couch watching tv and I let him stay there. LOL I figure when it gets uncomfortable enough he’ll come to bed.
And sometimes it is nice having the whole big bed to myself. Once I am in bed I find myself position and stay there. He on the other turns about 2 or 3 times throughout the night. Long arms and legs…I get flogged with them sometimes. LOL
Totally off topic,
Last night Elizabeth slept with us. I was dreaming I had little feet growing out of my face. I was totally flesh crawling. I woke up and she had turned sideways in the bed and had her foot planted firmly on my forehead. LOL
Usually when it just so happens she is in the bed with us I let her sleep on the outside but I have make sure I hold her tight. If not the dad well wake angrily growling “Raqi will you please get her!!!” because she kicks him in the face, neck, back too.
blue™
October 8th, 2010
12:27 pm
@Raqi – ROFL, thats what its like with midgets sleeping with you? that dream sounds tooo funnny…and well…a little creepy too…lol
I am whatever you say I am™
October 8th, 2010
12:30 pm
Jumping up and down in an attempt to volunteer my services…!!!!!
Sorry Simple: I am not accepting applications at this time but thank you for your interest.
Demi
October 8th, 2010
12:30 pm
Slim…a nice wway of saying…I need some space or I just want some me time…or Bishjustleavemethef/kalone goes both ways
i'm swiss™ (but you can call me Mr. Goodnight)
October 8th, 2010
12:30 pm
“Long arms and legs…I get flogged with them sometimes.”
Raqi — Yeah, Mrs. Swiss is a toss & turner as well… And when she rolls over she flails her arms. I’ve taken my share of forearms to the face, I can tell you that…
AmazonRed™
October 8th, 2010
12:32 pm
Raqi – Please keep posting pics of her! She sooooo cute!
Leggs ™
October 8th, 2010
12:38 pm
@I am ~ you almost opened a can of whoop arse with that comment (LOL)…nothing serious girl, nothing serious! Just funny that you responded.
lysa
October 8th, 2010
12:40 pm
I’d really like my mate to tell me, I’d like for us to agree on that. Sure there are days when you aren’t your best, but I feel you should always at least make an effort. When you get sloppy and stop paying attention to stuff is when somebody steals your man because you better believe they are paying attention.
If you have a good man, there is nothing wrong with keeping him happy, and of course vice versa.
Leggs ™
October 8th, 2010
12:40 pm
Ok, a can may be a bit too much, but funny anyway!
Mo (aka Moeisha )
October 8th, 2010
12:44 pm
Raqi – your story is why I have not ever let Lil Mo sleep with me. Hell we are both three apples high but I need all my space too! It is cute though….
SexyCool – I saw those! HEE-LAR-REE-US!!! OMG!
Demi – hey chocolate baby, they treating you alright over there??
Celisea...reincarnate
October 8th, 2010
1:06 pm
News: Larry Hagman won 11.6 million in a securities arbitration case again Citi-group
Haitians still living in 1300 camps 9 months after earthquake
Obama plans to veto a bill that will make it more difficult for banks to complete paperwork, giving homeowners more time to rework loans
The SSA sent 89,000 stimulus checks to dead or incarcerated people. The Stimulus package passed in Feb 2009 and payments made by May 2009. The Inspector General found 72,000 electronic payments as checks to people who would have qualified had they still been alive
Marcus Schrenker, ex financier faked his death in Florida plane crash for bilking more than 1 million from investors get 10 years
Mario Vargas Llosa of Peru wins Nobel Peace prize
Pepsi posts 12% profit gain
S&P rates GM credit a bit about Ford’s
Seven & i Holdings (Japanese retailer and 7-Elevan’s parent) fiscal 2nd quarter net profit rose 91%
Former CHiPS actor charged in “kick-back” scheme by SEC
Celisea...reincarnate
October 8th, 2010
1:07 pm
Guess ya’ll can tell I ain’t doing too much work…reading the newspaper
SlimNumeroUno
October 8th, 2010
1:07 pm
melo/raqi – he sleeps on the couch often when i’m not there. The other day was only the 2nd time he slept on the couch while I was there in a year’s time. I was just curious if other folks experienced that. He told me sometimes he likes to sleep on the couch for whatever reason, not that anything is wrong. Space maybe, or just doesn’t want to be cuddled up or whatever…My thought was, I can stay at home to sleep alone but i can also see what he means…so no biggie. I did go down there in the middle of the night to get him to come to bed. He sleepily said he would be there in a minute but that minute turned into him getting up when it was time to get ready for work. lol
Kym
October 8th, 2010
1:31 pm
Did everyone go on break?
blue™
October 8th, 2010
1:35 pm
hey Kym, i was wondering the same thing, whered everybody go?
Demi
October 8th, 2010
1:35 pm
Mo – i am on a slave ship to nowhere, lol
SlimNumeroUno
October 8th, 2010
1:40 pm
I thought the blog was broke down again… I’m trying to push on until 3:30 but as each minute drags by, it get’s harder and harder.
Kym
October 8th, 2010
1:44 pm
I know Slim that is what time I leave too….man somebody better do something to wake us up..cause these last two hours are killer.
I am whatever you say I am™
October 8th, 2010
1:44 pm
LOL @ Leggs 12:38
blue™
October 8th, 2010
1:50 pm
Woman mistakenly uses glue instead of eye drops – since the article says theres no damage to her eye, i am no going to LMAO….
http://www.ajc.com/news/nation-world/woman-mistakenly-uses-glue-666620.html?cxntlid=thbz_hm
Leggs ™
October 8th, 2010
1:51 pm
@blue ~ that woman was Huggy LowDown’s BAMA of the week this morning! WOW…