Who left the lights on Friday????

Lemme do a room by room check

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Melo! I was on the toilet when you turned off the lights!
Not cool dog!

Kindly turn them back on.
And start brewing the coffee!

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DO you come with references?

If someone asked you if they could call people from your past relationships, would you oblige?

I think not!

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Morning all!!! Hope everyone got everything or everybody they wanted this weekend!!! On topic…While I find this a novel idea, it would be soooo funny actually try this. In fact if someone I was interested in asked, I would be glad provide contact info to allow for verification of everything thery wanted to know….But this might be one of those time when its be careful when you look for something…You just may find it

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Morning All,

Uh No, dont want to s/w or even think about the dude that used to smash my chick. I really cant believe this was thought of by a Man. This right here is just plain wrong on so many levels.

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I could see it now

Dude: Can you provide your dating experience with I am ?
References exes : Oh, well you know that noone can love her like I can and I suggest you give it up because we are going to be together
Me: Damn Damn Damn James!!!!!

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….besides…commicating with the past, that’s just drama right there.
Why bother.

People are exes for a reason. It doesn’t mean that the same experience with go down once you start dating that person.

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Word of mouth references help immensly. The girls talk and have spread the word about the The Love Machine.

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Morning All,

is there coffee yet?
melo, hows that room by room check coming? no vampires or anything?

provide references, complete with numbers…hmmm…my gut response is he!! no..he!! no…and again he!! no…..first of all how crazy does it look to say hey id like to talk to your ex and see what they have to say about you, could you give me the number? and secondly, who would really want to talk to that person anyway? im thinking in my mind id be stuck thinking about whatever you may or may not have doen with her (thinking dude would be doing the same) and not even listening to what they had to say anyway : brain would be running on what did he see in her? does he think im like her? noticing similiarties between us and assuming he is only dating me because im like her….the list goes on and on…bad idea…and a Dude came up with this? really?

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I’d like to see just 1 real live example of a MAN actually calling up the exes of his current SO to ask some dumb shyt like this. Just 1. I got a few thoughts on which Blog-dudes may be capable of such a thing but I dont think even they would do it.

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Worst. Idea. Ever.

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@Slim – hey lady…thats what id be wondering about too, as either the one that their reporting on or reporting to…how in the world can you be confident that their telling you the truth? you dont always know the type of breakup they had, and you dont know them at all, why in the world would you trust their story? only way too would be talk to your intended and compare stories…novel idea just talk to them in the first place and cut the ex out….

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How weak minded does a person have to be to resort to asking someone’s ex about the person they have decided to date? This is such a bytch move!! So much so I can’t even come up with a skit.

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Journalism much? “Shutter at the thought”, really?

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“So much so I can’t even come up with a skit.”

c’mon, I know you got one in you…..

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Oh and 2C I did pay my debt to you when you drankitdid the rest of my 1/2 of a 1/2 of pint and you finished off my last three roaches.

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Good morning, everyone!

To call an ex for a reference on your character, sexual exploits, etc. is insane. Not many ex’s have very good things to say. For those who are still on good terms with other probably wishes the other well. Why take the spin of a scorned person into your own analysis of how this person is? Why even take the chance of someone else influencing your next step in getting to know this person? How one treated that ex probably will not be the same way they treat the new person. Ask me for an ex’s phone number and I’ll walk you the door!

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@Willie D

I don’t know if M-dot was suggesting a man do this. I took the post to mean something he’s experienced in dating.

I could generally give a fugg about what happened before me period, but there are some women out there that do. They look for references from friends and family at gatherings. Their ears (and suspicions) perk up at the mention of an ex’s name.

It happens. But I took it to mean from the female.

But I’ll let M state his own intentions.

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Morning all, hope you had a fun weekend. Mine was filled with sports. First UGA football game Saturday and the Falcons game on Sunday!

As for references…I come with glowing ones. Apparently all my exes say I’m wonderful…it’s not me it’s them.

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Oh and please support Blair Underwood in the TV show “The Event” tonight on NBC! Went to a screening last week. It’s a good show! And NBC has commited themselves to more diverse representation in their programming, so let’s support.

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Ladies,

So the blog question is about a potential datee calling YOUR ex up about you…but how would you feel if a person that’s dating YOUR ex called YOU up and asked for a reference about them? I know that first of all, i’d be upset that my ex gave them my number to begin with. 2nd of all, if he didn’t give them my number, I’d immediately think they were crazy to go through the trouble of looking me up. 3rdly, I can’t even imagine how you fix your mouth to start asking questions about the ex to expect a warm, honest result.

That’s almost like calling up the last chick a dude you’re currently dating now and asking what moves he performed on her in bed. Or a dude asking another dude, yo is she flucking AND sucking…does she swallow etc…(but in that case I would assume it was for just a sex situation, not someone you’re considering DATING)

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2CPTG,

I’m quite impressed with Newton so far, now if the rest of the team can get a hold of the penalties sheesh!

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I think y’all are forgetting how small a town the A really is.

From professional to personal associations, everybody knows something about everybody else.

So finding out about a Kappa, a Delta, or someone in the accounting profession ain’t really that difficult to do. Where the crazy line is crossed is: how much digging is going to get done?

At a certain point if you can’t ask me the questions (directly) that you’re asking everyone else about me, then we don’t need to date.

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thppt

abc now that was funny, never seen that in print

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M. – So you are indeed cool with discussing things like this with the Ex. would you go so far as to ask for ph#’s and then call?

Me personally, I would want to know some of the past behaviors but would have to find that out in the dating process.

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but how would you feel if a person that’s dating YOUR ex called YOU up and asked for a reference about them? just like you said, wow he sure knows how to pick the crazy ones, and besides that seems too much drama, why get involved? cause either i tell the truth and then ex is calling me up “why you had to go and tell her that?” or i lie to save your @ss, why bother? the relationship was let go, let all the drama go with it? to me calling the ex just seems insecure at best….

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The idea of getting a general idea of your partner via his past relationships works for me. I don’t think a search of my past would turn up anything too alarming. However, I don’t think it’s such a good idea for a current guy to contact an ex and I wouldn’t contact a guy’s exes.

Real – No skit? Who suppose to make me laugh today?

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M., it ain’t about what topics we’d suggest….if you haven’t noticed, REAL LIFE stuff moves this blog….hypotheticals ain’t it…cause with this, “I think if people want to talk to their ex’s just to ask a couple of questions, it would not bother me;” you’re kidding, right?

abc, not just yet….the Huskers are coming along, but not just yet…

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Dan – I understand that and it is different from what we speak of today. Personal/professional associations all of that is fair game because its public knowledge.

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sorry i didn’t fill in my full moniker

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@M

I agree that information is good to have, but go to the source.

Why would I be asking Bobby, Tina, and nem about her? I’mma ask her. And if she is found/caught lying, then I know what I need to know. Just like if she tell me the truth.

I’ve had ex’s keep tabs on me, but if someone I’m dating is asking everybody about me but me then that’s a problem. One rectified by a conversation and/or dismissal.

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Where is a good place to go to lunch around Perimeter mall area,

Ooh, yum. I like Wildfire and Elipse di Luna. Mimi’s Cafe is black owned I’m told. McKendrick’s steakhouse is the best if you want spend loot. And then you’ve got your typical chains like Maggiano’s and Cheesecake Factory.

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@Blog

So you guys never gotten setup with someone by your friend and asked the scoop on them?

You see someone at a cookout that you dont know, but if the host knows them, would you ask, whats their deal?

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So you guys never gotten setup with someone by your friend and asked the scoop on them?

M. – Yup, happens all the time. In real life, Facebook, etc.

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How would I feel if someone called me up about my ex that they are now dating?

If it were the exes that were abusive: I would have to disclose that

If it were any other ex: I would put in a good word

If it were my sons father: I would say RUN!!!!!!!

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Good Morning All,

I am going with my fellow Gen Xer’s on this..Worst idea ever..sums it up. I mean why ever in the world would you care what someone else thought about your current SO? What didn’t work for one person maybe the best thing that ever happen to the next person. You find out about a person through trial and error. If it works great..if it doesn’t move on. People constantly change…and seriously you have to consider the source. The person is an ex for a reason.

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A red: twisted taco!
I just thinking about that

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@M

Yeah, to the setup; no, to “scoop”. I need to make my own assessment.

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Dating references are cool, but nit from an ex.

Personally, I would not even want to see you ex. Because the moment I see them, I may bench you based on how I look at them. ‘how can you phluckk a dude like that?’

However, people that know the chic could provide valuable information about her. Neighbors,friends and college buddies.

Dating a complete stranger is really like fishing in the ocean. Sometimes you reel in a gator instead if some mice tilapia!

So dating somebody that comes with a good recommendation/reference from a fellow acquaintance is not such a bad idea.

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i am… — I hear the Cheetah has a nice lunch buffet (allegedly) & you’re sure to find plenty of dudes there…

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People constantly change…and seriously you have to consider the source.

Indeed. Whatever the experience was with the ex, that could very well be truth but also a thing of the past. What if that person has grown and your encounter is with the new them? Seriously, that’s something to think aobut. I have a coworker I never worked with directly but knew of her back in 1998. She would come to my floor and dish with my old supervisor about the different ones of us (can I say). I didn’t get into office mess but I was considered “mean.” Well over time and years I’ve softened quite a bit and really let about 80% of mess that cross me keep right on moving…if it’s not blatant I know how to shrug off and keep moving. When she found out I landed the position she called all the folks we mutuallt knew (even a bff that worked with her in this same exact role) whose last recollection was me from 1998. So, she’s come at me every which way expecting some hot headed response but nope, not happening. Now she’s baffled. Even when my manager got wind of all of her attacks, she stated “I know taking the high road is all good but sometimes things need to be brought to surface.” She asked why I hadn’t reported her. Honestly, I leave folks like that in the hands of Jesus. Which is another source. I didn’t have Jesus in 1998…a WORLD of difference. Anyway, I told her “don’t feed the trolls”….yep, got that from the blog but that’s exactly the way and said it and she died laughing. Point being, what she expected from me and those she got it from was so off centered because although I may have been quick on the draw back then, some things just ain’t dang work the trouble. Maybe because she hasn’t changed she figured all folks are stuck like her.

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LOL@blue..references before sex please..like Slim said..dude will want to know just how freaky was she man…yeah I really can’t see a dude calling another dude up about that..”sounds like some gay shiddgy to me”(said in my best Pimp Named Slickback voice.)

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I said all that to say, sometimes asking an ex and what you get could very well be on point…but people change sometimes for the better sometimes for the worse.

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Speaking of exes…why do I have one poking around my electronic professional profile? Toooo funny. He don’t know that I know it pegged him as the one looking. Stuff like this just validates it’s him, the unknown numbers and calls and stuff. It’s been almost 2 years since we talked and about 6 months since he messaged me asking to meet and work things out. SILLY RABBIT

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FB can let you know who’s looking at you

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I forgot to mention this—-> I thought FaceBook was already a main reference locator. Shoot you have folks looking at your page, and trying to figure who your friends are and what each post mean. Most of the time their assessments are all wrong, but still they are doing background/reference checks.

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Red: I went to Mimi’s once a long time ago.
It was for a team builder.
It was so long ago, I can’t remember whether or not I liked the food.

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SLim: I’m wondering the same. I’ve been looking at folks I have no business looking at

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Where In Cali, not Where is…

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@Simple Man – I went to UC Berkeley

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I am (Scratching my head on that one…who could you not have any business looking at?..exes, current gf’s of exes?, married mens?-lol)

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Slim: I was looking at an ex….

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Thanks, i am… — and just so you know, there is absolutely no padding in those man-thongs… that’s all Matterhorn…

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@I am – dont worry, if we’re not ‘upposed to do that, then im guilty too at times

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As folks have previously stated, you change, evolve make adjustments over time throughout your life. So I would hope that any potential mate wouldn’t assume that what I did or how I was back as a freshman in college is anything like how I am now. There are just too many years in between to think i’m exactly the SAME way doing the exact SAME thing as I did way back when. You would like to think that you’re making better choices as you get older, or at least not making the same mistakes.

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VIVA EL MATTERHORN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I think my ex may know though.
All his pages are now hidden

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M. 11:09 – I think once you’ve decided to merge households, certain information is critical. Yep, I’d want to see a credit report and would gladly show mine as well. Employment history and STD’s would have been on the table a long time before households merged… if we’re getting serious.

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@sun1 – See if he’s on FB and send him a friend request.

I laugh, cuz it’s a little ludicrous, but it’s worked in my favor a couple of times. Not every social setting allows you to exchange info, but it doesn’t mean that there was no interest there.

Or you can just ask the bride to pass the message and see what comes back.

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@Slim11.08?

I know right! Your camel too has done changed from the college days, dater, fuller and more pleasurable! Lol

@sun 1??

Just let the sister in law send word that u feeling him and see if he bites!

If he does, u better behave yourself and carry yourself with dignity.
If u happen to go on a date, keep your lil fingers and hands to yourself coz you don’t want to set yourself up as a thirsty h03!
good luck!

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@I am – awww – alright now cant go so far with it that he thinks you’re stalking him….

@Leggs/CZ – so my dad drove up to Queens to check on my Grandmother since she wasnt answering the phone (turned out just to be service down) says her whole neighborhood is trashed, uprooted trees, roofless houses, crushed cars…says like her hoouse and the 3 next to her seem to be the only half block not touched, everything else is a mess…crazy weather

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Slim, wouldn’t that be interesting if Diva let Melo introduce a topic…..

Diva, are you listening to your constituents?

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2CPTG/Slim?

I think there will be a lot of female cursing that day!

This muth&(;:>€¥ melo thinks every female is a h03

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AmazonRed™@11:24 Or you can just ask the bride to pass the message and see what comes back…Was thinking this just didnt know what I should tell her to tell him, any suggestions? I know I may sound “nieve” or something, just havent taken this route before, its sort of like approaching a guy & I dont want to do that or seem like Im doing that.

Just let the sister in law send word that u feeling him and see if he bites!

@ Melo “If he does, u better behave yourself and carry yourself with dignity.
If u happen to go on a date, keep your lil fingers and hands to yourself coz you don’t want to set yourself up as a thirsty h03!
good luck! ” LOL, thanks will try

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yep luvbug you don’t even have to be searchin’ sadly……..i am serious…..I was just surprised how FB will link you to folks that you are friends with vice versa…..the info meaning much info is out there and with the searches if its public info its out there…..I have learned a while back not to go searching for anything anymore…..whatever is meant for me to know I will know and trust it comes full circle at the end of the day without a sweat…..lol

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blue: Think he knows?

hope not

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Curiosity kills boredom. Nothing can kill curiosity. <———What do y'all think of that?!?

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blue – How far down the line? How did it come out?

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I know that advice sucks, A Red….but wonder why she left if she had an “interest” in ol dude….I’d think you would hang around just for that reason alone….or hell, here’s a novel idea, make your intentions/interests known!

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@Luvbug??

I don’t think I could ever meet a chic and not think what her scream and crazy is like, if she is high or low on the sex need and what her sexual history is like! Never!

Now, after we meet, it’s on her to redeem herself in my eyes, based on her conduct.

If she has been on a year(s) long sex sabbatical,like yourself, well and good then, melo Jnr will prove that to me’, in time!!

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hmmmmm ok lol…….moving on…….enjoy your day crew!

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Melo – Have you ever asked upfront? If you could find out without her knowing (and without searching), would you?

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Melo- It’d have to be someone you’re already really into…like Queen status or how you felt at the height of your relationships with your exes.

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@sun1 – The Facebook route has given me 100% success rate. I’m not found by just a govt name serach, but once I put the friend request out, guys have always shot me a note and ended up asking me out once we got to know each other better.

As for asking the bride, a simple “I would like to get to know him better but don’t know if he’s interested” would probably work best. I’ve found that one to be hit or miss because you don’t know how the “middleman” will broach it. They can make you sound crazy or desperate. I wouldn’t leave it in someone elses hands if I could help it.

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@Luvbug?

Men don’t ask, they go out to prove for themselves. Which ever way she is! H03, decent,lots of history etc.
There are always some tell tell signs on a woman.

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Blue – You’re in a serious relationship, so a proper response is outside of my capabilities…but I would like more details at least for the professionals who are good at delivering great answers on the blog.

What was his reason for not telling you when he introduced her? Was this just a HS thing…when had they stopped being together before you two got together?

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Is that why you haven’t “poked” me on FB, yet?

First of all…I don’t poke on FB

2nd of all…I don’t know who you are on FB.

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Melo – I thought your answer would be the big p thing. I don’t know if that’s a tell tell sign though…or how a woman carries herself. I know a few loose women who look all but loose. LOL

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@i am – your randoms crack me up……lol

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@Luv?

I’m feeling the tatas first before I scope the big p!

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Hold up Blue!
did you just add a trademark to your name!>?!
LOL

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AmazonRed™ @ 11:24
So you would be OK with a person you just met in passing sending you a Facebook friend request??

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Catching up today has made for great lunch reading….

Melo, I don’t care how rough the ladies handle you for being a horn dog, You are alright with me!! LOL

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Note to self…..Search AmazonRed™ on Facebook…..

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Off topic: Items confiscated by customs at JFK airport… WTF? My personal favorite is “cow dung toothpaste” from India. Seriously?

“Dude, your breath smells like azz!”

“Cow’s azz, actually. Thanks for noticing!”

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And the foolishness continues.

Y’all are a constant source of entertainment.

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Luvbug

September 20th, 2010
1:18 pm

Funny you should say that…When I get married, I would not mind if she at one point was buck azz wild,and MEGA FREAKY… as long as it was in another city, in another region of the country!!! LOl

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Simple Man – I believe it!! I think a few guys on here have been pretty open about not wanting a green woman. They’d rather she hit the ground running.

Swiss –

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LURKS

September 20th, 2010
1:23 pm

Lurks….I am just getting to know my blog mates…..

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Simple Man – Regarding your future wife with the sketchy sexual history…would she offend you if she initiated the freaky or does that not bother you either??

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Simple Man- Regarding your future Mrs with the interesting sex history…would you be turned off if she initiated the freaky most of the time or are you fine with that too??

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Luvbug…. truthfully, I have been with both experienced and novice women and on all that I own, I would take the vet over the rookie, everyday of the week!!! As long as she does not have spots on her booty or her mug on the Marque at Starship, ……. Now I am game for a women to initiate the freaky RIGHT NOW! She can kick off whether she wins the coin toss or not!!!

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alright, rying to catch up and got held up on “cow dung toothpaste” – just ewwwwww….ok, what are we doing now?

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swiss – You’re right. I knew it, but didn’t know how much. Seems everything else is secondary…hey, I was slow on that one. Knowing is half the battle right? LOL

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@For Real – (feel like im walking into a setup, hmmm…) yes, they can be friends….
@Simple Man – As long as she does not have spots on her booty or her mug on the Marque at Starship, … , smdh….

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Shoot me already then… I didn’t know how much. I thought maybe 30%, 40%, 45%…not 98%.

Dang!!!! LOL

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Is this a rash? LOL

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“It’s me I’m a sucker for Cat in the hat.”

4 Real — My ex got a tattoo of The Cat in the Hat’s hat — just the hat — above her “cat.” I suppose is seemed like a good idea to her at the time, but it sure looked funny when I was f@#king her…

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Don’t be too quick to impress when u dating.

Melo- This has never been a problem. Apparently, I missed the freak boat. Oh well, they’re always paraplegics.

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Okay, I take that back…too far.

But seriously, I don’t feel like doing all that. Exhausting.

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Oh, and thanks for the PSA, For Real — apparently, the message hasn’t gotten out to everyone.

On that note, from Bill Maher’s “New Rules” segment this weekend:

New Rule — Ladies, if you dragged your man to see “Eat. Love. Pray.” this summer, then you must accompany him to a movie called “Football. Jerk off. Nap.”

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@For Real?

U don’t have a shortage either!

@Luv

If u wanna play and just dish it to guys like For Real who have a long layaway plan,that’s cool too.

Remember tho that sex is like candy, u can always unwrap it eat and change to a different flavor when u done with this one.

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Melo – My Non-Marriage plan may not be so different than Real’s layaway plan…but, Real is in a completely different sex league than me anyway, so it wouldn’t be hard for our types to completely miss each other. LOL

I gotta go for the niche market…

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Luvbug,

I love for a woman to be if not as good, be at least as willing to work at it!!! And if she should get to the point where she can take away my chapionship belt…Then I will wife her on the spot!!! LOL

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Dan – No, I’ve never held back…just never been a freak…I just do what’s comfortable for me…so the advice is what it is. No plans to change in either direction.

Not unless my life depended on it.

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:sick:

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@swiss – that eat, love, pray thing is soooo obviously a chick movie, why would you bring your guy anyway? i mean, he’d prob go just so that he could get paid for it later….

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any chick flick i wouldn’t see, please believe I wouldn’t make my man go (if I had a man)

So I went to lunch at twisted taco….
there were men there, not my type.

Oh well, at least the tacos were good

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Wait…actually, I have on some positions. I wasn’t trying to keep him for a ring… I just wasn’t trying to be owned. LOL

Dreams- What circumstances??

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For Real – that must be Dr. Seuss the adult version.

‘ it sure looked funny when I was f@#king her’

@swiss you sure do find ways to make me crack da hellz up. I bet you were a magician that night, making the snake disappear and then reappear into the hat several times…Now you seeeeee it…..now you don’t VOILA!! lol

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@Dreams

Men and women can be friends. You just have to avoid the awkward silences.

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@Luvbug – ive never seen her show, but she does sound rather abrasive on the commercials.
@Dreams – Tilted Kilt – oh, thats funny, lol….

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I am – Find some home improvement project to pursue and take a trip or two to Lowes and Home Depot. Those places beat a bar or restaraunt any day of the week. I’ve met nice guys there that have homes and work well with their hands.

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You’ll never be able to look at Slash the same way, will ya, Slim?

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Dreams- What circumstances??
luvbug a paraplegic midget chick with HIV. lol

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Dreams – LOL. That may not stop some guys from lusting. I was watching TLC a few years back. They were doing a doc on a women who had a few kids and a boyfriend. She only had her lady part and up…she walked with her hands. Seemed vibrant.

How was the 5k?

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Dreams – I almost just may have to agree with you to a certain extent. A male friend I have that I often talk to about different things, recently told me we need to take a break from communication because he was starting to have inappropriate thoughts about me. We have never come close to anything outside of a platonic friendship…i’m glad he at least told me the deal. However, I don’t want it to be awkward going forward.

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Dreams Mat!
good lookin out!

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Whats the big deal with guys and girls being friends?? I have several just friends, one that happens to be “Fine as all Out doors” and we have a grat fiendship…. I think the key is to lay down the ground rule early and make sure you never end up doing date shyt like cooking dinner for just thetwo of you or sleeping in the same bed…. I make it a point to never do anything with with my female just friends that I don’t do with my male friends…

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“…She only had her lady part and up…”

Now if only there was a woman w/ just her lady parts & down…

I kid, I kid…

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Simple – It’s no big deal until one of you gets a serious gf or bf and your new SO feels uncomfortable with yalls closeness. But yeah, if you keep your activities STRICTLY platonic it works out better.

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@Dreams – a paraplegic midget chick with HIV – wow
@I am –
@Simple Man – Im with you, it is possible, there just have to be rules set out. like most other relationships, there have to be boundaries…

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What’s up Simple Man ? I am over here working today. The funny thing is I must chill a lot, because on the days I am working hard like today I feel like I am on a plantation.

…I am trying to catch up so I can jump in on the discussion. Are you teaching the blog group how to be friends with the opposite sex???

I have male friends, but lately they have been catching feelings, and thinking we look good together. That gets on my doggone nerves.

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but a really small bit though…

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Simple – That’s interesting. I’ve actually been bit by the “just friends” thing. Both times, dude assured me he & ole girl were just friends. I’m not the jealous type and rather prided myself on how “confident and secure” I was.

The joke was on me cause both situations ended in dude marrying his “friend”.

So while I’m still confident and secure, I’m nobody’s fool either. My current SO has two good female friends but both friends have cool husbands that he is friends with too. There are no “questionable” outings & things. We do couple things together – one of the couples came with us on the recent cruise. There are no conversations he wouldn’t feel comfortable having with those ladies in my presence.

I don’t think you have to end all friendships with the opposite gender once you meet a SO if all parties handle it right.

Do you think that was the ONLY reason your friend ended it with ole boy or was that just the last straw?

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See I’ve completely went to bat for male “just” friends when I began a long term relationship. Like it was clear from the start these were men in my life before he came and 10-1 they will be here after you. The man in my life at the time, it took him a minute but eventually he was clear they were “just” friends and had no issues.
So lets turn the tables two of them are married now. And each one of them dumped our friendship after the wives were like there is no way in halo you can still be friends with “her”. And guess what they choose the wife, and that was a hard blow to take. I took it on the chin and let it go. Life lesson right. I thought these were lifetime friendships that really just turned out to be “good friends until I get married and my wife is not secure in herself”.

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@Breaking – i think you said a mouthful, those friends of the opposite sex when your u have a SO, all boils down,imo, to whether or not your SO is secure in themselves, and whether or not you give them reason to doubt the nature of your relationship with the other person…if youve been less than truthful about your dealings with them or evasive, youve created a situation for them not to trust you. doesnt seem to me that simply the mere idea of having friends of the opposite sex should be such an issue…

that said, am i the only female on here who wouldnt mind being “friends” with Pitbull? im just saying…the way he roles those RRR’s…..

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kimmie, @ 3:34 yeah I asked her about that after the fact and she said that should never be involed with a person that would try to control who she had in her life… Now maybe there had been some other things that she had noticed but in this case that was the deal breaker…

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@blue I need to google pitbull

@Breaking of dawn…I was real good friends with a male. He married young…I guess around the time we were 22 or so. Long story short his wife could not take our friendship while they were dating, but she became more accepting after they married. However the way she always felt I the two of us had something going on…I kept my distance after the marriage. I really think it was the way he brought our friendship to the table was the main problem. I paged/beeped him one time, while he was out with her, and from what I heard he was running around saying,”I need to call DD back where is a pay phone or cell.” Everybody was looking at him in like why do you have to call Diana back so fast and he was like that is my sister something could be wrong, and don’t question me when it comes down to her. He should have calmed down, because 9/10 I didn’t want anything. Just beeping him to see what was up.

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blue – ™ You and I could be friends….:D

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I don’t ever want her to be in a position where she would even be tempted to question where my true priorities lie.

Swiss – That and your entire post is the way things are supposed to be. In both of my cases, the dudes were coy and evasive about the friendships. As if ANY question I had was my own insecurity. That’s how they messed with my mind. And if you are messing around, what better coverup than to say “oh, we’re just friends”. Now I’m a lot smarter. I truthfully look at myself and ask if I’m being insecure and seeing something that just isn’t there or am I truly being disrespected.

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@Blue…where is Freddy Fred today?

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Or, to put it another way, Simple… If she’s that cool that you value her as a close friend and that attractive… then why wouldn’t you want to take it to the next level? Just curious…?

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Dreams – LOL. That may not stop some guys from lusting.
Luvbug yeah you’re right. So, it just confirms my initial point about male/female friendships.

I think the key is to lay down the ground rule early and make sure you never end up doing date shyt like cooking dinner for just thetwo of you or sleeping in the same bed…. I make it a point to never do anything with with my female just friends that I don’t do with my male friends…
Look at all the restrictions/qualtifications you have to put on a male/female interaction in order to qualify it as a “friendship”. What are all those restrictions for…to keep the two of you from being in a position where you all might phluck. I don’t think you should have to do that with a friend. Someone almost always catches feelings.

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Hola Profesora! i had oatmeal for breakfast which always keeps me full for way too long. i did manage to finish a fruit bowl for lunch though.

so check this out … we chose a beachfront home that has a 1-bd unit downstairs and 2-bd unit upstairs. the house also has a pool and hot tub. the owner just informed me that someone rented the lower unit (which we requested) for our travel dates, so we can have the upper at the same price. so we now have …. wait for it …
exclusive access to the rooftop terrace with the outdoor kitchen and ocean views! yeah baby! NOW I’M EXCITED!!

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@blue I see pitbull he looks pretty tough…you know in a real man way…not in that pie way. Well please let fred rest, because in a few hours it will be 90’s booty shake night and I need him ready.

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thats how i see it, you should be allowed to have your friends, as long as ou make it clear where priorities lie.
blue, czBrat I would argue that the women swiss is talking about don’t qualify as friends. He has no interaction with them that doesn’t include the Mrs. Does this same requirement exist for his male friends? If you have to downgrade your “friends”, then they weren’t your friends.

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@Simple?

So u basically saying that u like pudsy that u personally seek and hunt for??

I’m with u there except this is ur friend that u hold in high regard and she phone as hell!!

Comeon man, hit it, that’s ur friend!

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Sooooo Blue!! i am in the market for cool platonic friends…You down???

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Speak now or forever hold your peace!

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I wonder how often people speak at that moment. I’ve never witnessed it outside of tv.

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Dreams — I agree with your hypothesis… Of all my female “friends” — there’s not one of them who I wouldn’t have f@#ked under the right circumstances… Which is precisely why they now get relegated to “mutual acquaintance” status now that I’m off the market…

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YOU PUT THE SIMP IN SIMPLE SIMPLE MAN

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Simple?

Watched as being in the delivery room?

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Kimmie – Whaaaat?! They are together now?

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That’s just damn unnecessary drama Kimmie!

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@Cz

What did she do wrong in your eyes?

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Wow. People certainly have balls. Guess I’d have died on the sword of pride. Ole girl could have had him. I’d have been hurt, cried and everything, but break up a wedding? Pssst, whatever!

Why’d they divorce?

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@luvbug I am with you on that 4:28

@czBrat did you say this if not, she’ll get stomped. Don’t stomp her…just make some of those peanut butter cheesecake bites

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Kimmie: I’ve tried your 2:something or nother
post but guys don’t talk to me there. They look stare but don’t offer to strike up convo….

no before the rest of the blog starts: No I am not ugly, I’ve been told by numerous folks that I’m a catch

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Dude don’t believe in God, now he got aesophagal cancer!
The spot?!

God is kind and cruel and funny too! :lol
Check Hitchens on google

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Kimmie: Wait a minute, so, if I have sex with a chick we ain’t friends?

Swiss: I know you asked Simple but I would tell her we are BFFs no matter and I mean no matter what takes place between the two of us and then I would have sex with her and when I’m finish I would slap her on her back and be like holla at you tomorrow BFF.

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@For Real, yes sir I did! I used to have a beeper back in the day…hahahah

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random: oh wow! I leave in 15 mins
Time to do some work.

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Melo….Watched as in sat outside while she delivered..

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Dawn: I think you are leaving out some info in your story about ole boy that you were friends with. Cause if I’m their friend I understand they are trying to do what they believe is best for their happiness and if I’m their friend why stand in the way or be hurt by it. If that’s your boi, then he your boi but I think that was your boy.

For Real now rubbing up 2DDs only find out it was her beeper.

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Kimmie: I think I may have to hang with you. Seems like you know a plethora of nice single guys

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Kimmie: I go to places where I am more likely to find quality dudes but at those events: the nerdy guy that ends up being a great friend talks to me.
THe guy i would like to know better doesn’t know I exist *sigh*

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melo, it was lots of little things. they were co-hosting a dinner party at his house to introduce me & her s/o to their mutual friends.

she ignored me the entire evening; she would ask me to move rather than ask me to pass her something (like she’s showing me she knows her way around his house); she called him “papi” (just once) which he says he had never ever heard her say before; she stood in a circle of myself and two other women and mentioned an upcoming fashion show. she invited the other women and said “great! we’ll make it a ladies night” and very specifically left me out of the invite. and she must have mentioned 50 times throughout the evening that they had been friends for 7 years and had sooooo much in common. she pointed out to everyone how they like the same music, how they like to cook, how well their kids get along, etc.

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there’s more but i can hardly believe i’ve said so much already, so imma stop right there. suffice to say i got her in my crosshairs.

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Melo: you have been asking me the same question for almost a year now. Let it go. Move on. It’s over

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czBrat she wants him…like that Kelly Price song. It is the cut after R.Kelley and Kelly’s skit on the National Anthem…it is called, “She wants you.” I don’t like those games, and that “papi” mess is for the birds in that situation.

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@DD – Pitbull, def no pie there…
@Dreams – 411: i would argue they were friends, as yuo would expect your real friends to understand that their ranking in your life may change once someone has been made SO…imo, that should not have been an issue, SO comes first
@Simple Man – Sooooo Blue!! i am in the market for cool platonic friends…You down? i can be cool platonic friends….its what i do best….lol
@cz – i finally said, look, take it from a woman, she wants you – works for me…ime guys dont get that, we should accept that htey know what theyre talking about without ever having met said friend, but we meet their female friend, smell Barricuda all over her, and we are overreacting….got to love it…

lets c, what else have i missed….

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ok, that sounded harsh For Real. you know i luv ur stoooopid azz

blue, s/o tells me all the time that if a man pretends to small talk he’s really trying to holla and that i have to learn to recognize it. so i was just trying to return the favor and school him on his lil buddy’s female ways.

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I can hear the rumors now For Real, Blue and czBrat had a threesome yesterday after everybody left the blog.

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@For Real – lol. hey, im just sitting here eating my pudding cup. whatchuuu doin?
@cz – im here till 6 too, but only on monday thank goodness. i said the same about invitations, he pretended not to get it. pointed out to him that should be the standard, and when you add these odd invites (and he!!, who invites a married man over sanz wife at 4 in the morning? he should be headed, creeping into bed, trying to get some b4 he passes out…) the fact that when we are out together she puts her headphones in her ears and only takes them out when hes talking to her, acts like she doesnt hear me…nope, best to get her b4 i do….

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ugh! well i feel for ya, but i’m kinda glad to have your company in this lil boat of ours
i basically told s/o it is his job to set the boundaries. thereafter, if she doesn’t respect them i will handle it. i would do the exact same to any “friend” who does not welcome the man in my life.

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it’s bout to be trapeze in here For Real. cuz you know “everybody” never really leaves the blog. we have voyeurs.

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@cz – , whatchu know about trap? lol…that place can be fun….

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down to the final 10!

ciao

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nite!

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