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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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How much support do men need?

If you have ever watched HBO’s Entourage, you are familiar with the character, Ari Gold, played by Jeremy Piven.  Ari Gold is a foul-mouthed, raging jerk with a temper that makes you wonder how he has managed to get through the day without a black eye.  Since he is a Hollywood agent, this behavior manages to work for him in business.

In a recent episode, Ari’s wife walked out on him after his trademark public tirades embarrasses her.  Apparently he felt abandoned by his own wife.  She tells him that she refuses to sit by when her husband is acting like a classless idiot.  He says that is the exact moment when a wife should be supportive. (Paraphrasing)

I know loyalty and support is pretty high on a man’s mental list of what he needs from a woman.  When a man does not feel supported he is less likely to trust his partner to be there when he needs him.

So what happens when a man is dead wrong but still wants to be supported? How should a woman handle it? Does she keep her opinions to herself and offer him support and comfort?

How much support should a woman be willing to offer and provide when she does not agree with what he is doing or how he is handling it?

Is it fair to ask for the same loyalty and support from men that they need and want?

Guys, have you ever dated a woman who wasn’t accepting and supportive? Did you let her know that is what you thought about her?

Ladies, do you think women have a hard time supporting men in relationships? What have you learned about being supportive in a relationship? How did your mothers handle it?

537 comments Add your comment

Dirty Diana ♠

September 14th, 2010
10:07 am

You know I don’t wear clothes before high noon :wink:

White man

September 14th, 2010
10:07 am

Good morning all….

czBrat

September 14th, 2010
10:09 am

HiYas! yawn & stretch

it’s always been my philosophy to stand by my man in public, but if i disagree with him we’ll talk about it in private. and i expect the same.

the character described seems to follow a pattern of behaving badly for no apparent reason. there comes a point i’d have to tell him to grow up and be a better person or he’ll be rowing our ’ship by himself.

Simple Man!!!!

September 14th, 2010
10:09 am

Dirty Diana ♠ @ 10:07…

Did it just get a little hot in here???

Dan - simply...

September 14th, 2010
10:10 am

@abc

Do you really believe that being a man is being “an island unto himself” without need for any support?

White man

September 14th, 2010
10:10 am

Just heard something HILARIOUS….I was getting coffee in the break room and one of my black employees said she put too much sugar in her coffee. She said….”taste like coffee flavored Kool-Aid, I love it”. I almost fell in the floor laughing!

Dirty Diana ♠

September 14th, 2010
10:10 am

@White man, are you back????? LOL Please tell me you are not blogging out of the supply closet.

@Simple Man, no it is still cool with a nice breeze flowing.

Raqi

September 14th, 2010
10:10 am

There have many a couple of times when me and mine had a conversation after the fact for something that one of us said, especially when an attempt was clearly made to derail the statement.

Bad behavior should not be supported however there is a way to address everything. However repeated arsehole behavior is cause for an arsehole response.

When and/or if he says something that is clearly jerktastic I have no problem saying “you shouldn’t say that” in public. When it’s not that serious yet something that should not be said, mainly something I told him in private and asked him not to repeat (LOL), I try gesture him to “shh”. He will do the same to me. His is usually a look and then rub of his ‘stache. LOL Over the years we have codes for many things that we use when in public. And yes there have been times when I was alone with my girlfriends after the fact that I had to cleanup a statement that my partner made. I have no doubt he has had to do it himself when with his friends.

IMO there is a thin line sometimes in opting to support or not support behavior while in public. To not say something when it’s a really bad situation will make you appear to be a party to the nonsense. However, on the other hand to say something and say it the wrong way can make it look as if you are berating your mate in front of others. You just have to learn and know how to respond and/or react, when, where and how.

As for support itself, I think mates should support the significant other’s endeavors and ideas. Especially when they are in line with the betterment of the person or relationship. However, you should never allow a person to make you compromise your integrity.

blue - ½ -n- ½

September 14th, 2010
10:11 am

yes, i just got scared by the window washers thumping by…didnt realize that was today…im too high up in this building for random things to be thumping on windows…..

Dirty Diana ♠

September 14th, 2010
10:12 am

@czBrat hola, would you yell on your man’s behalf in public?

White man

September 14th, 2010
10:12 am

I am white and no I am not in the supply closet.

Mr. Moe

September 14th, 2010
10:12 am

@DD your 10:07…..um yeah, I gotta agree with simple on that one

EastsideSweety

September 14th, 2010
10:13 am

Morning Everyone,
I’ve seen this happen many times and I can’t stand it. I’ve never been one to argue in public. If somethings wrong noone else needs to know and if its that bad we don’t need to go anywhere. Period!! Since I feel like things like that shouldnt happen anyway, I would do one or two things. If i care about him enough we will talk about it at home and hope it won’t happen again, and if I don’t thats the last time we will go anywhere together. I’d prefer not to have any outings ruined because he didnt wear his big boy drawers!!

Dirty Diana ♠

September 14th, 2010
10:14 am

I had to make sure you were not having a “date” at work in that area you spoke of yesterday.

White man

September 14th, 2010
10:15 am

no no, not today.

White man

September 14th, 2010
10:15 am

Dirty Diana ♠

September 14th, 2010
10:17 am

Mr. Moe I wasn’t trying to

JetBlue

September 14th, 2010
10:21 am

Okay, I thought for ONCE, this would be an article about how women could and should be more supportive of their male partners………..BUT, low and behold, more male bashing! The title of the article is misleading………where is the love/respect/support for men who DON’T act like fools? Instead, you first blame the man for being “dead wrong” and then ask women how they “cope” or deal with it. BTW, the last few questions didn’t help……the damage was done.

SexyCool

September 14th, 2010
10:21 am

SexyCool

September 14th, 2010
10:23 am

I would like to think that my *picker* works well enough at this point in my life that my chances of being involved with an individual who would behave so badly in public to the point of embarrassing me are slim to none.

There’s a lot to be said for emotional intelligence and emotional maturity.

White man

September 14th, 2010
10:23 am

Isn’t that what all women do? Bash the other sex?

SexyCool

September 14th, 2010
10:24 am

Oh…wait…my bad….

Three Words Daily – Laughter’s GREAT medicine.

Hence I get to laugh. LOL!

Dana

September 14th, 2010
10:25 am

Simple Man….is White Man!!!! He posted with the same e-mail address on yesterday as White Man….he just changed the name and used the same numbers….Chile Boo!!!! Go’on some where….they called your story BS yesterday anyway!!!!!

The childish antics of DD are back in effect today. Girl, you need to get a life!!! I bet she keep a list of people on the blog that done crossed her (so to speak) and wait to see them post so she can say something mean!!—So dam* childish!!!!

Always quick to call somebody ugly or revert back to comments about high school…..this right here…speaks of a child-like mind!!!! Regardless of how “grown up” you think you are.

Dirty Diana ♠

September 14th, 2010
10:25 am

JetBlue just gave some interesting feedback. Fellows, do you all agree? I sort of felt this article could go into putting men in a bad light, hence my 8:47 when I mentioned my male friends.

Dirty Diana ♠

September 14th, 2010
10:27 am

Simple Man!!!!

September 14th, 2010
10:27 am

Dana

September 14th, 2010
10:25 am

No Dana…Simple Man is Simple Man…

Purple Rain

September 14th, 2010
10:27 am

Diana, I am trying to remember my passwords..LOL..I had my email “remember” me but somehow that got erased and now I cant remember my own password. I shall win this fight with gmail shortly. LOL

White man

September 14th, 2010
10:28 am

Dana, i have no idea what you are talking about. I am the same White Man as yesterday. honestly.

Jaie

September 14th, 2010
10:28 am

Good Morning All!

kimmie

September 14th, 2010
10:30 am

Morning all!

I’ve never dated anyone that really clowned on me in public. I had one boyfriend that was very opinionated and got into an ugly debate with some of my cousins at a bbq at their house. Of course, I checked him when we got away in private. I told him he certainly had a right to his opinion but he couldn’t stuff it down someone else’s throat in their own home.

I have absolutely no tolerance for ghetto behavior. I carry myself in a dignified manner and I expect anyone with me to do the same. I date men, not boy children. Even kids that are in my care I don’t tolerate showing out in public. For all their faults, I’ve never dated a guy that embarassed me in such a way while we were out, so I can’t really comment.

To me, being supportive of my man and his endeavors, which I gladly do, has really nothing to do with public embarassment. I don’t make excuses for bad behavior off anyone.

Mo (aka Moeisha )

September 14th, 2010
10:30 am

Morning All!

SexyCool – Im gonna heed your three daily words and stay over here in the cut, laughing!

On topic – I agree with most of whats been stated: save the arguing in public. Totally unnecessary…..

SexyCool

September 14th, 2010
10:32 am

Mo – >>>here<<<
LMAO.
:)

Purple Rain

September 14th, 2010
10:32 am

So Simple Man is White Man? That is wrong on so many levels.
1) Changing your name. LOL
2)Claiming to be another race and then talking about your “black employees”
3)Why?

Simple Man are you really “White Man”?

White man

September 14th, 2010
10:33 am

Kimmie, what are you referring to?

White man

September 14th, 2010
10:34 am

White man is WHITE MAN…..I am white and work in Gwinnett. I have no idea why you guys are saying I am Simple Man.

Purple Rain

September 14th, 2010
10:35 am

I am going ot make me an alias “Italian Studmuffin”, but you all would figure it out because I am such a Stud.

Purple Rain

September 14th, 2010
10:36 am

White Man, what do you mean “you guys”? HUH? LOL

Kym-Dirty Bird can't fly with a broken wing

September 14th, 2010
10:37 am

@SexyCool you laughing cause you got the #one spot in the league this week. That’s alright I am not far behind ya.

SexyCool

September 14th, 2010
10:38 am

P-Lito – Reminds of that line from Tropic Thunder. LOL!

SexyCool

September 14th, 2010
10:39 am

K-to that YM – Yes ma’am. I did that!
Take that! Take that! Take that!
Complete with the Puffy Shuffle.
Really LMAO now!

Simple Man!!!!

September 14th, 2010
10:41 am

Purple…No, Bru…Simple man is Simple Man… Dana is about as wrong as two left shoes…..

blue - ½ -n- ½

September 14th, 2010
10:41 am

@JetBlue – where is the love/respect/support for men who DON’T act like fools? Instead, you first blame the man for being “dead wrong” and then ask women how they “cope” or deal with it – interesting, i think a lot of the women on here do comment on when their SO got it right, but in order to answer the question asked, you head into the not so pleasant territory. tho i will agree, women can get just as stupid as men do where this topic is concerned, and imo should be treated the same way….save the ugliness for the private eye not the public forum

Simple Man is White Man – interesting theory…showing my ignorance here, how exactly are yall checking these emails to unmask the alias’s?

kimmie

September 14th, 2010
10:42 am

White, I gave my opinion about the topic for today. To me, showing my man support has nothing to do with tolerating him acting a fool in public. For him to get mad and say I’m not supportive when I check him on his bad behavior is just making excuses.

Other than that, what are you asking me about?

Purple Rain

September 14th, 2010
10:43 am

Diana,(and everyone else who has it) I can not remember my gmail password at the moment. You can email me at my for fun email p_rain72@yahoo.com

czBrat

September 14th, 2010
10:44 am

Hola profesora!
now he & i have talked about how i’m not the type to just step back and let him take a hit. he says if i get in the way we’ll both be in trouble. thanx, bloggers, for the posts about one of us staying out of jail. that really puts things in perspective. :lol:

are we really gonna start the day with fights and moniker nonsense? this is soooooo NOT the peaceful tuesday i had in mind.

i think i’m gonna go sit by blue :)

Purple Rain

September 14th, 2010
10:44 am

SexyCool, that is what I was going for “Tropic Thunder” LOL

Leggs

September 14th, 2010
10:45 am

@Jaie ~ welcome back…your probationary period has been lifted. Hope you enjoy your residency here in Blogsville.

@Mr. Moe ~ any special b-day plans?

Dirty Diana ♠

September 14th, 2010
10:45 am

@Simple/White Man the real question is, which one of these h0es are posing as Dana? :cool:

Purple Rain

September 14th, 2010
10:46 am

CanalZone, do you need some stress relief? Want me to start with some of my corny jokes?

Dirty Diana ♠

September 14th, 2010
10:46 am

how exactly are yall checking these emails to unmask the alias’s?

Do you really want to know?