Freaky Friday: Whose fantasy is it?
Have you ever wondered if you were too “vanilla” or inexperienced compared to your date or significant other? Would it bother you if you found out that you were?
I ask because a friend of mine went on a first date with a new guy recently. He randomly mentioned his rendezvous with two women during the date. Yes, you read that right.
I will pause here so you can react with disbelief like I did.
She became “visibly annoyed” and quickly changed the subject, unfortunately she had already heard too much. Now she can’t seem to shake off the little details he managed to divulge.
Where do I even begin? First of all, why would you even mention your former hook-ups with someone you are interested in? How tacky is that? Secondly, is that some kind of new compatibility test some people use now?
Mr. Threesome rambled on about how he was glad he got it out of his system. Is this the sort of thing that single people want to do before they settle down? Does sowing your wild oats mean you get to want to live out some fantasy that you have?
He also argued “they don’t call it every man’s fantasy for nothin”. I know, charming guy, right? Do you think this is true?
When you are in a relationship, do you think it matters if one person is more “vanilla” than the other?
accessAtlanta Partner Sites
Sections
Advertise on accessAtlanta.com »
Reach the audience you want by advertising on accessAtlanta.com
Join the Access Atlanta Network »
Advertisers and Publishers, expand your reach by joining the Access Atlanta Network.
Tell us what you think about the site
Visitor Agreement | Privacy Statement | About our ads
© 2013 The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
763 comments Add your comment
Simple Man!!!!
August 27th, 2010
9:28 am
Note to self…Remember to find out which hat is for recruiting….
blue - Waiting...
August 27th, 2010
9:29 am
@swiss – once youve dont teh 3some, got it out of your system…had a friend of mine tell me it just got him thinking about up-ing hte anty…3 chicks, 4 chicks…harem lol…told d@mn better have a goooodd sammich on standby, your gonna need it! so far, he hasnt found his harem tho, wonder how many chicks would actually agree to that, i mean not in the industry of course…
@DD – sssshhhh, Fred’ll hear you! isnt that just like a pusher….
Dirty Diana ♠ Maybe, maybe not
August 27th, 2010
9:30 am
@Simple Man I agree with that 9:22 that makes sense, and I will add an open mind. You don’t want someone saying no, no, no. no. no, no (in my destiny’s child voice) when you bring something up.
MELO
August 27th, 2010
9:30 am
She became “visibly annoyed” and quickly changed the subject, unfortunately she had already heard too much. Now she can’t seem to shake off the little details he managed to divulge
Morning folks!
aaaaagh Diva! way to go for a Friday.
see that trick works if u smart and cunning dude..the way u come in is the way u close amnd i agree with Simple and Swiss and Poppa too….the way that nugget is received and processed will guide how u relate to girl or even categorize her later on.
I bet Diva’s friend likes dude coz shes in angst right now,thinking about what he said but still processing whether to date him or not. If she continues dating him,shes gon be put on the scream machine at some point and she will try to out compete the other 2 chics in dude’s past coz she needs to stake her place, and that info will be on her mind…Diva wont be told this obviously!
Diva,tell ur friend melo said, Thumps Up to the dude!
Its amazing how u can make a chic in ur corner out-compete non existant competition,just by what u tell them!
Luvbug
August 27th, 2010
9:30 am
blue- How tall is Fred??
Poppa Grande
August 27th, 2010
9:31 am
Kym
The GA bar is a two day test. All of both days…
One day has the MBE (Multistatate Bar Exam) everyone in the country takes that test on the same day. It is multiple choice. The other day is all essays each states is a little different on that. The MBE is usually Wednesday. In Georgia, it is only offered in February and July.
Right now, I am going through the application for fitness just to sit for the bar. Which is basically a background check to see if you are morally fit to be a lawyer. They want all of my old addresses and stuff like that.Credit reports too.
The Truth-Playing in the sand again :(
August 27th, 2010
9:31 am
Hey Ared. Do you know where he is?
Poppa, congrats on getting to the end of the road. Passing the bar will be a breeze for you.
On sex, I’d rather sleep. LMAO
Leggs, I enjoyed america much more than you could know. Can’t wait to get back for good. How is little legs?
Simple Man!!!!
August 27th, 2010
9:31 am
Lurks…No, I am a relative newcomer, but the Blog fam has been most accomadating!!! ( That is until The Truth came in this morning and reclaimed my online sweety) LOL
Leggs
August 27th, 2010
9:33 am
@PoppaG ~ you will do just fine on the Bar exam.
AmazonRed™ - vanilla with sprinkles!
August 27th, 2010
9:33 am
Truth –
He was in Qatar the first time, but now he has a wife and two kids so he went to where the biggest money is…I think he’s in Afghanastan.
When are you coming back? You’ve been gone forever!
i'm swiss™
August 27th, 2010
9:34 am
blue — Yeah, I guess you either satisfy your curiosity, or you find your calling…
Luvbug
August 27th, 2010
9:34 am
Which is basically a background check to see if you are morally fit to be a lawyer.
LOL
Poppa Grande
August 27th, 2010
9:36 am
Luvbug
As part of my school, I’ve gotten to work with an attorney on murder case. Woman killed her husband, but is claiming batter woman syndrome. He had returned for Afghanistan and was not the same man that he was when he left. Much more abusive to her. He suffered from PTSD. However, they ended up in an altercation and she put two slugs in him stomach and he bled to death. Thank You 3rd year practice act. I got to sit 2nd chair.
I have no desire to do criminal work, but trial is definitely an adrenaline rush.
Dirty Diana ♠ Maybe, maybe not
August 27th, 2010
9:37 am
@blue dont say “pusher” just call me your kind-kandy lady. The folks may be reading.
Question for the blog, I know men love to say that they dream of a 3-some. Do we have any women out there that dream this dream, or made it happened? Can I just sterotype this as a man thing, and women just do it to please/keep their man?
i'm swiss™
August 27th, 2010
9:37 am
What’s up, Truth? Long time, no read, man… Hope all’s well…
blue - Waiting...
August 27th, 2010
9:39 am
@Luvbug – well hes eye to eye with my desk, so i guess like 30 inches or so….he says 36, but, umm, noo….
@Swiss – lmao, yeah i guess thats it. that many women tho, seems he might get lost in the shuffle, lol. i guess it would be like Jamie Foxx said in his stand up “sitting in the corner, watching, going you need the dyck, got the dyck right here, anybody need a dyck?!”
Poppa Grande
August 27th, 2010
9:40 am
Luvbug
Believe it or not…we laugh at it too. Most of us just think that it is another way to get money out of us. The application must be accompanied by a application fee of $500.00.
However, I know of a person that had to wait a year because it was found out that his dad was the grand wizard of the KKK in Floyd County. The problem came because the applicant failed to put it on his bar application, and they found out on their own. They claimed that the applicant was trying to hide it. Hiding evidence in bar application could lead to hiding evidence in cases. (I don’t know if that is true, but rules are rules)
AmazonRed™ - vanilla with sprinkles!
August 27th, 2010
9:40 am
Dirty D – Any 3some dream I have is like a movie version. Everything goes as planned, and you don’t have to deal with feelings or reality afterwards. I have no desire to actually do it in real life.
Luvbug
August 27th, 2010
9:40 am
Fascinating PG. Good luck on the bar. Although, I’m sure you won’t need it.
Nooow, does she have children?? How do you feel it should play out?? Not necessarily guilty/not guilty but jail or no jail??
Kym-I only look sweet and innocent.
August 27th, 2010
9:40 am
@PoppaG Gotcha..I agree with Truth you..will do well on the exam. And as long as that moral fitness ask you nothing about what you did in South America during Carnival..you got the morally fitness too..LOL!!!
kimmie
August 27th, 2010
9:40 am
Good morning gang!
Truth, you KNOW I have been patiently waiting your return! How DARE you, ova there still drooling in the sand over Leggs! I’M DEVESTATED!
Fellow Bulldog Swiss – You know my allegiance will always be to my beloved Bulldogs, but I am a GSU alum too. So, since this is their football team’s first year, I think I might throw them a bone and give them a little support. Just thought I’d let you know that!
On topic – Tacky dude, Wise. But that was strategic. Next – unless she’s really interested. I would not have been annoyed, but amused. I would have laughed and he would have thought I was crazy. Why be annoyed unless you were really looking at dude as a potential? He’s let you know upfront you aren’t! Anyway, I do think it’s good to get stuff like that out of your system before you marry, especially if its something you feel you can’t or don’t want to share with your future spouse.
kimmie
August 27th, 2010
9:41 am
Poppa – You will blow the bar out of the water, I know it!
Luvbug
August 27th, 2010
9:42 am
blue – I thought so…the way he ran out on DCRose yesterday. Just like a man to try to add 6 inches. LOL
abc
August 27th, 2010
9:43 am
Trotting out BS like that on a first date paints a ‘loser’ label on that guy’s forehead. My first impression would be that he’s lying. Some folks are just plain weird.
If you feel ‘inexperienced’ compared to someone you’re dating, chances are you’re dating a slut. Dump them, they’re not worth it.
Poppa Grande
August 27th, 2010
9:44 am
ARed
How is life in SWATS?
Truth
Thanx. How is life for ya? Keep stacking that paper!
Kym-I only look sweet and innocent.
August 27th, 2010
9:46 am
“but trial is definitely an adrenaline rush.” See this is where I had my little moral issue last week. I am all gung-ho on Consumer Rights and power to the people. But I have no problem what so ever researching someone’s wages, filing a claim, slapping them around in court for the judgment and garnishing wages.
“It gives me great joy to take 25% of your paycheck until this debt is satisfied.”
Raqi
August 27th, 2010
9:46 am
Having matching libidos are not only important in a relationship, but the willingness to experiment with your partner should align also.
I don’t think it is quite that uncommon when two people get together that one may have a little more experience in diversity than the other. That is part of the fun in a relationship, IMO, doing new things together. Even if it is something neither of you have tried before it is fun trying it out together. That way you learn together that conventional sex in the shower is just too darn dangerous. Coital activities in elevators is against the law. Carnal pleasures in a hammock at first is uncomfortable but when you try and try again it can be…well…uh…satisfying. Sex on the beach belongs only on television or in a drink at the bar. Sand will get places it should never be. Integrating creams, syrups and sauces with precopulation is messy and sticky. Fun all the same but still a mess.
All that to say it’s all about the enjoyment that the two want to experience together. Some things you will find are just not for you and some you will like.
However, it is not ALL the time about swinging from the ceiling and tumbling around on the floor. There are many days when simply relating, releasing and relaxing with that special someone is quite fulfilling.
M. (pronouced M dot)
August 27th, 2010
9:46 am
Friday.
Interesting encounter for your friend wisey. I blame the guys. Some of these guys need to cut the ineuendos out. Thats not going to make her like you more or last. Just be you. You hinting around is not going to increase your chances of closing the deal.
If someone is vanilla, then thats cool but if she is vanilla ice (i.e., faking the funk and really is Adina Howard in wolfs clothing, then we have a problem!) lol
Poppa Grande
August 27th, 2010
9:47 am
Kym
I was in Rio and did what Rio does….LOL.
Kym-I only look sweet and innocent.
August 27th, 2010
9:47 am
@kimmie I’m a GSU Panther too! I think I am going to homecoming..Get me a GSU Football shirt.
It's me....lurker
August 27th, 2010
9:49 am
If you feel ‘inexperienced’ compared to someone you’re dating, chances are you’re dating a slut. Dump them, they’re not worth it.
When I read today’s topic I sorta wondered along those lines —-> What if a dude is vanilla compared to his girl
Raqi
August 27th, 2010
9:50 am
As for the guy in the topic I think he was just trying that young lady. No one looking for a serious relationship would be revealing anything of that nature that soon in dating. Heck most don’t even mention that type of stuff until you have gotten to “know” (biblically) each other first.
The Truth-Playing in the sand again :(
August 27th, 2010
9:50 am
Ared: Its been 1.5 years. Im 1/2 way to my goal so 1.5 to go. Im trying to get out of here though. Id like to go to Spain or Japan for the the last part.
Swiss: Why does ev1 think its alot of work. You have 2 women there doing all the work. All you have to do is jump in right before the big O and claim the glory. :p Btw, hows Ms Swiss?
Leggs, you are forbidden from communicating with Simple Man from here forward. Do you know he blogs with a smoking jacket and pipe and wears an ascot? Think James Bond. (something tells me that isnt going to help my cause :l )
Someone tell me that 64gb ipad with wi-fi and 3g isnt that hot so I dont place my order in a few minutes. Please
AmazonRed™ - vanilla with sprinkles!
August 27th, 2010
9:51 am
Hey Poppa G –
Life in the SWATS is good..for me…*knocking on wood* Thieves busted in to the Publix on Cascade, trying to get the ATM machine. They didn’t succeed but they busted through the storefront.
A few of the homes for sale in my subdivision have gotten their A/Cs stolen. Some of my neighbors can’t believe the crime in the city. I figure they must be country folk then cuz this is nothing. At least folks aren’t getting killed.
It's me....lurker
August 27th, 2010
9:51 am
Not saying to be more experience constitutes “slut” just wondered how a dude would feel if his woman had way more miles. Guess it’s sort of like know how many partners one compared to the other…
blue - Waiting...
August 27th, 2010
9:51 am
@DD – kind-kandy lady, got it…dontcha know he’s over here talking about orange slices….got a long road ahead of us….
, felt like Mr.Brown “stop being nasssty!”
@Luvbug –
@Raqi – lol, seems the hammock would be abit of a challenge…creams, syrups and sauces – food can have its place i guess, gotta be careful tho. had a gf say she and her man “lost” a grape
kimmie
August 27th, 2010
9:52 am
Kym – The new football couch was on Q100 this morning and got me fired up! Plus they played the new fight song, and it got me excited too, especially since it was put together by a guy from UGA!!
But you know, I have no shirts or anything from GSU, just my degree hanging on the wall in my home office! It was all business when I was there, unlike UGA. I have almost a whole separate UGA wardrobe! But yes, I will definitely get me a T-shirt and a sweatshirt and hit up homecoming!
Poppa Grande
August 27th, 2010
9:52 am
Kym
If I’m not mistaken, your son is a teenager. There are a lot of changes for a male during that time (just like female) and he is also adjusting to a new place. So, he’ll be fine.
My nephew is now 13 and he started smelling himself recently. I made a call to a friend that is a Clay Co judge. We took him to her office one day during the summer and gave him a talk. After the talk, she had him put into a jail cell by himself for 30 mins to show him what can happen if you make a mistake. From what I’ve heard, he was ready to get out after 15 minutes. Scared straight…I think. No more problems from him. He is doing well in school and sports now. No more poking his chest out.
AmazonRed™ - vanilla with sprinkles!
August 27th, 2010
9:53 am
Truth – I didn’t realize you were doing a 3 year stint. I thought it was only a year. We’ll glad to see you are well and still checking in on us!!!
2CPTG©
August 27th, 2010
9:53 am
how do we know the chic didn’t bring up sex in the conversation, and dude just expounded his views? Then, when she got more than she bargained for, it was like, Oh My!!!!! I seriously doubt he just brought up 3-somes ooutta the blue; some’n had to spark it…..
kimmie
August 27th, 2010
9:56 am
A few of the homes for sale in my subdivision have gotten their A/Cs stolen.
Amred – I wish someone would steal mine, cause it sure doesn’t work!LOL!!
MELO
August 27th, 2010
9:56 am
Not saying to be more experience constitutes “slut”
@It’s me….lurker??
u jus trying to make some pple feel better bout themselves this friday,right??
Apologizing for sluttness
Poppa Grande
August 27th, 2010
9:57 am
ARed
I know that crime is bad, but times are hard too.
The copper in A/C is valuable. Theives took the a/c unit at our local library branch…2 weeks in a row.
The word is that many kids are doing the thefts. There are adults that knows how the court system thinks in juvenile court…the standard is “best interest of the child”. So, they are less likely to get jail time. So, adults are recruiting kids and then when the kids get into 17 or so, they recruit other kids. There have even been cases where parents have driven their kids to houses to break in.
It's me....lurker
August 27th, 2010
9:58 am
Melo – u jus trying to make some pple feel better bout themselves this friday,right??
Apologizing for sluttness
LOL…naw dude
Raqi
August 27th, 2010
9:59 am
Blue, lost a grape? Why in the world? Uh nevermind. LOL
The thing with creams, syrups and sauces most need to be kept away from certain orifices because they can be irritating if your body is sensitive. I had a neighbor once that found out she was allergic to honey after she and her boyfriend took it into the bedroom. She said not only did she have a breakout allergic reaction, her very irritated nether region was out of commission for some time.
Kym-I only look sweet and innocent.
August 27th, 2010
9:59 am
@PoppaG..yep he is a freshman. He is not doing the whole I’m hard thang. He is just flat out bored..he wants to draw and write stories in class. He really has found himself on the football field. One of the other parents noted..he really is enjoying himself out there. Poppa G I have a feeling I know the judge you are talking about. Does she teach?
MELO
August 27th, 2010
9:59 am
2CPTG??
Im thinking she was proly dressed in some kind of h0e attire!
and dude just felt, “well, i think ima get it tonite,after all” then shoved in that “prior history lyrical assist”.
i'm swiss™
August 27th, 2010
10:02 am
kimmie — I’ll allow that. Mrs. Swiss is a panther, too, so I’ve got love for GSU.
Truth — You’re right, man, it’s all about timing…
I do think it’s mostly about the visual (well, at least for me) — but there are some other definite advantages beyond just that to having 2 chicks working on you at once….
2CPTG©
August 27th, 2010
10:02 am
Melo….something did it…
cause if she knew he was a perv from the jump, I doubt the date would have even taken place….
The Truth-Playing in the sand again :(
August 27th, 2010
10:03 am
Ared, yeah, Im trying to do three. I have alot of ground to make up. Did you move? Sounds like mexicans if they’re stealing ac units. You over by Cascade United?
2C, good point. Ol girl prolly thought he was hot and the tongue slipped. He could have just picked up on it.
Poppa, not to sound stupid but I thought criminal and trial law were the same. Expound or explain please.
Kimmie, lmao at your ac not working. Do we need to take up a collection for you?