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Dating: Time to break your deal breakers?

Single people we need a reality check. I include myself because I have been guilty of adhering to random dating deal breakers. Funny how I seem to meet someone really great who I have chemistry with but hit the brakes (no pun) when there is an issue with something about them.

It’s not just about having a “type” we like to say we prefer, it’s more than that. We extend our “I don’t do” lists so far that we talk ourselves out of a potential…something. We never find out what that something is because we don’t let it go further. We figure the deal breaker is protecting us from heartbreak, disappointment, confusion. Um, yeah… how’s that working out for you? (Said in my best Dr. Phil voice)

So let’s reconsider some deal breakers that we have that probably don’t really belong on a list of reasons to rule out someone, shall we? I will go first:

I never dated someone unemployed. Now, I am not trolling Georgia Department of Labor for dates or anything. I would however, give a guy a second look if he seems like a kind person. Circumstances arise that may cause some people to be in transition. Does that mean they aren’t dateable?

Ok, your turn. What dating deal breaker are you willing to reevaluate?

A quick poll of my single friends and I found that their deal breakers included: someone with full custody of their children; someone less educated; someone unfit or doesn’t work out regularly. What do you think? Are these legit or kind of ridiculous?

It’s almost as if we are meeting and dating, but when we spot a “human” thing, we just check out on the date or relationship.  Then less effort is made to take things further.  I can speak intelligently about this because I have done this too many times than I even want to admit to myself, let along you guys.  I am working on it though, this counts for something, right? Personal growth points maybe? It’s all part of the dating process, I think. Live and learn.

I just think that single men and women could both use a healthy dose of humility. Do you believe that men are more willing to overlook their “deal breakers” then women? Wait, do men still have dating deal breakers!?

Happy Thursday!

430 comments Add your comment

Sassy Me...Chocolate Cutey :-)

July 15th, 2010
1:44 pm

If you are a regular blogger why are you changing your name moniker to respond to someone…That show a sign of weakness….

Worth repeating…

Purple Rain

July 15th, 2010
1:44 pm

The lotion, quote was from the movie Silence of the Lambs.

Melo

July 15th, 2010
1:45 pm

This guy I’ve been talking to on the net??

@I am??

On the Net??

u ask me about how much I am getting it and I am envious of u all this while, thinking somebody is banging u right now so u off limits??

:roll: :roll:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

@LURKER??

why are you changing your name moniker to respond to someone…That show a sign of weakness….

Irony of it all. :roll:

I am whatever you say I am

July 15th, 2010
1:45 pm

Kimmie: I never give anyone my personal info other than my cell phone.

It's me....lurker

July 15th, 2010
1:46 pm

I too think Stanley Steamer is an old crow either regretfully living or wishfully wishing

I am whatever you say I am

July 15th, 2010
1:47 pm

Lady-How can something so familiar be so strange...hmmmmm

July 15th, 2010
1:49 pm

my ADHD won’t allow me to catch up!!! geesh and sigh! yall enjoy your afternoon! lol :)

peace!

Melo

July 15th, 2010
1:50 pm

smashing breaker

meeting u on the Net after u bulldoze ur way onto my yahoo messenger!

My angst qstion wld be why are the real street dudes running away from ur azz that u have to take it offshore to the InterNets??

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

kimmie

July 15th, 2010
1:50 pm

I never give anyone my personal info other than my cell phone.

You don’t have to “give” it for someone to get it on the net.

SlimOne

July 15th, 2010
1:51 pm

PRain – I know that quote…we used to say it all the time at my last job. lol

Melo

July 15th, 2010
1:53 pm

@I am??

does that chic with the leg pic get coc high by piercing her syringe thru the leg?? Its faster??

Purple Rain

July 15th, 2010
1:54 pm

Kym

July 15th, 2010
1:54 pm

I am sitting here LMAO at the post..ya’ll joker sure make the day fly by..LMAO>>old crow!!!

Purple Rain

July 15th, 2010
1:55 pm

We are heading to Florida after work today :)

Sassy Me...Chocolate Cutey :-)

July 15th, 2010
1:55 pm

I too think Stanley Steamer is an old crow either regretfully living or wishfully wishing

Okay now y’all just being mean… :lol:

anonymousella

July 15th, 2010
1:55 pm

ok. steven q you’re approaching hilarity now.

1. why do you care so much that your future sister-in-law is almost 30 and not married? dude, that’s weird.

2. check the NYT wedding section if you need proof that 30+ women can and do indeed get married for the first time.

3. if your fiancee is in her 20s, are you also in your 20s? your age would explain your … odd way of thinking.

4. if you are in your 30s, then why do you think you are somehow more desirable than a woman of the same age? honestly, when i was 27, the idea of dating a man 31+ was kind of repulsive. ditto most of the 20-something women i knew then and know now. just sayin’.

5. not everyone wants to get married. not everyone should.

Purple Rain

July 15th, 2010
1:55 pm

Old Crow, that will get you drunker than a skunk in no time. It is a potent drink.

Purple Rain

July 15th, 2010
1:56 pm

Stanley before you leave, I just want the link to the video of the woman, pleasing herself till she dies.

Kym

July 15th, 2010
1:59 pm

@Purple Rain you are going to need to say about 3 Hail Marys for that last comment..

mark

July 15th, 2010
2:00 pm

Lucinda why you gotta call me names:(

Leggs

July 15th, 2010
2:00 pm

I am so stuffed from eating that stuffed pizza. I change my mind. It would be given a 9. Delicious!

@Stanley ~ you’re about due for a new vest.

Steven Q. Stanley

July 15th, 2010
2:01 pm

1. It’s weird that I care about my sister in law. Ok, you and I have different views on family then. Where I come from we care about our family. Different strokes for different folks I suppose.

2. The longer you wait, the less likely it is to happen, this is fact. Also the longer you wait, the less quality dudes out there.

3. I am 30 and have been with my girlfriend since 28. It’s not about being desirable, it’s about finding a mate for life. Men over 30 have their pick of younger women and women, crazy as most of them may be, their own age.

4. Most women dream about walking down the aisle the day they take their first steps. Then they go and watch one too many Julia Roberts movies and get an unrealistic idea of love and relationships that causes them to be 35 and alone.

5. Sure, a few women don’t want to get married, they are in the minority and not who I am addressing.

Hope this helps.

SlimOne

July 15th, 2010
2:02 pm

PRain – You should come scoop me up on your way to FL…I’ll be you and Julia’s personal sun screener put-er on-er :mrgreen: You can just pay me in vacation. :-D

Steven Q. Stanley

July 15th, 2010
2:02 pm

Leggs

July 15th, 2010
2:04 pm

“1. It’s weird that I care about my sister in law. Ok, you and I have different views on family then. Where I come from we care about our family. Different strokes for different folks I suppose.”

Perhaps it’s me, but that didn’t come across as a “concern.” More like a slur against her character. That’s how I read it…you were mocking her and the stats on women 30+ years and never being married.

It's me....lurker

July 15th, 2010
2:04 pm

I bet Stanley Steemer watched the video too and THEN thought oh woa is her…mmmmm hmmmmm

Purple Rain

July 15th, 2010
2:05 pm

Hail Mary, Hail Mary, Hail mary, full of grace… :)

It's me....lurker

July 15th, 2010
2:05 pm

Leggs – Perhaps it’s me….nope you’re spot on, Stanley sho is concerned about his SIL

Steven Q. Stanley

July 15th, 2010
2:05 pm

Well you read it wrong then.

Purple Rain

July 15th, 2010
2:06 pm

Slim, where do we pick you up? DO you know how to work a video camera? LOL

kimmie

July 15th, 2010
2:06 pm

Leggs – Yes, I doubt anyone would appreciate his kind of “help” and “concern” that comes in the form of putdowns and insults.

LURKER (I want some of dat)

July 15th, 2010
2:07 pm

@Stanley….Make sure you send that post…..of the video of the woman pleasing herself to death.

@Anna….I know quite a few women in their 20 something getting it on with older men. I have several male family members in the 35 plus range who are currently working the 20 to 30 set….yeahhhh

Dirty Diana

July 15th, 2010
2:08 pm

@anoy this is my theory Steven Q wants a 30 plus year old, cougar-vixen,on the prowl, but they always let him down. Therefore Cap’n Steven Q got jokes for you (if you are over 30).

Lady wassssuup diva!

@Mark you make scared to sample outside the race. What if we just hold hands and go to the movies a few times. Will you let me back in? Also an AA lady called in this morning on the Rickey Smiley show and said dating outside her race is the best thing that has ever happened to her…she was married to an AA man seven years. She said swiss men got it going on…she said it with truth and passion. I am going to see if swiss has any friends for Dirty Diana. :wink:

Purple Rain

July 15th, 2010
2:08 pm

If I every want to try suicide, masturbating to porn would be my weapon of choice. I will just have to keep trying until I got it right. LOL

kimmie

July 15th, 2010
2:09 pm

sho is concerned about his SIL

It’s me – She ain’t his SIL yet. Maybe he wants to offer another type of “help”. Just saying.

Melo

July 15th, 2010
2:09 pm

Steven Q. Stanley ??

welcome to the blog buddy!

Now by linking us(blog) to that story that qualifies u to blog membership, 2 blog vests,dranks for a week from Dreamz and a guided tour of Slimone’s CT,with the legendary YEAAAAH LURKER hosting u.on that tour….

By copy of this memo,Ms Leggs will arrange to have all of ur blog materials handy when u visit her office later this afternoon.

Welcome!

Kym

July 15th, 2010
2:10 pm

@Leggs..no you didn’t. That old crow showed up in here telling every woman on the blog over 30 that they were all going to die alone. Reads like a character attack to me. Besides no matter what the topic..that is your same calling card.

Purple Rain

July 15th, 2010
2:11 pm

Leggs

July 15th, 2010
2:11 pm

Okay, Stanley. I’m going back to read it. I’ll let you know if I think otherwise.

Kym

July 15th, 2010
2:13 pm

Stanley Q is the “you gonna die alone” dude and Mark is the “chocolate chicks who like the swiss need not apply” guy.

Steven Q. Stanley

July 15th, 2010
2:13 pm

I am only here to help, I apologize to those who think otherwise. I know some of you are content to die alone and are already stocking up on cats to live with you. For you guys, hey, I mean no offense, live and let live I always say. My comments are for those who are not content to be alone their entire lives, please do not take them as personal shots against you, just motivation for those who think differently than you but need a little help getting to their goal.

Kym

July 15th, 2010
2:16 pm

@Stanley well I like dogs..so I am good. Besides I think the purpose of this life is to enjoy our short time on this planet..Remember.. “Life..No One Gets Out Alive.”

kimmie

July 15th, 2010
2:16 pm

He gets crazier by the minute. I bet there are cats all over the place where he lives!

LOL!!!

Leggs

July 15th, 2010
2:16 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:

@Stanley ~ the fact that you put that sentence in about her sister, her age, and not close to finding a husband was your one gallop poll results to warn women over 30 that they may be alone with their cats. The older you are, the pickings are slim. That’s what I read in between that one sentence.

SlimOne

July 15th, 2010
2:17 pm

‘DO you know how to work a video camera?’

Mr. Prain, sir I am familiar with the older type camcorder’s. However, please do not let that discourage you from considering me for the position. You can be certain that with my strong attention to detail and direction, I am an exceptionally fast learner. I will further bed any current doubt by offering to accept a trial faux internship, compensated my a reasonable stipend. So what do you say Mr. PRain…do we have a deal? ;-)

Kym

July 15th, 2010
2:17 pm

@kimmie Like they say..Consider the source!

Steven Q. Stanley

July 15th, 2010
2:18 pm

Leggs, this blog and comment are all the poll you need. But it can be observed everywhere.

Melo

July 15th, 2010
2:19 pm

I think that story for me demonstrates clearly why a BOB shld be a real temp solution(BlackMagicw u listening??)

coz when u excited like that and u dont have somebody to help u in the event of cardiac arrest but a live person……….??

U got a problem….so im glad that stuff happened coz some females were getting so content with their BOBs……so now….u need help ladies……

that is where Steven Q. Stanley comes in!! :lol:

It's me....lurker

July 15th, 2010
2:19 pm

It’s me – She ain’t his SIL yet. Maybe he wants to offer another type of “help”. Just saying.

Kimmie – I’m wondering too if it’s more about being disgruntled than wanting to help. Maybe she wouldn’t accept his form of assistance given that he seems much older than he’s letting on, so now he’s mad at everybody over 30 and subconciously hoping all end up being the cat lady. They say misery LUVS company. I think he’s got cats. How else would he know what happens after 30 and on down the road and you’re still alone?

Sassy Me...Chocolate Cutey :-)

July 15th, 2010
2:20 pm

Maybe he wants to offer another type of “help”. Just saying.

For real,right? I wonder how this simp thinks he can save….wait a minute…who said women needed to be saved in the first place and how is some random,acrid “young” dude(he probbly went to school with Moses) going to save ALL of woman kind? His posts aren’t objective they’re MOIST…say it with me Stanley Steamer….it’s okay boo boo..really it is…

Concentrate on YOU and the little girl you’re tryna raise</delete? marry.