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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

I’m with stupid

I have a thing for smart guys.  The smarter they are, the sexier they become.  It just seems to make things a lot more interesting when you are engaging in an intelligent discussion that one or both of you are passionate about.  I believe that intelligence alone can make a person increase their hotness exponentially.

I can remember a time when being a smart woman didn’t matter much to guys.  The shallow years had their fun moments but they certainly didn’t have many deep intellectual moments.  If a guy asks me what my interests are I tell them that I am a science geek with a Biotechnology masters degree.  I embrace my geekdom! It seems that as I got older the men I met and dated got less shallow, and so did I.

How important do you think it is to be intellectually matched with someone?  There is only so much stupidity one can endure before the person becomes un-hot and annoying.  How long could you last dating someone just on looks?

368 comments Add your comment

Lucinda

May 27th, 2010
8:24 am

You are right, the brighter a man is, the more appealing he is. The best way to get to me is definitely through my brain.

I once dated the nicest, kindest, most thoughtful man around. He also had mad skilz in the boudoir. Unfortunately, he just wasn’t all that bright, and I ditched him for that reason, but never had the heart to tell him why. I know he wondered what went wrong, but there wasn’t anything he could do to change his lack of brainpower.

Gary B

May 27th, 2010
8:43 am

I may be considered by some a brighter man then others, but I can’t say it’s translated into more successful relationships. If anything, I welcome the conversation with intelligent women, the problem for me honestly has been finding them. I am re-entering the dating world after taking some time off to focus on my career, and I must say it seems the smart, beautiful women have already been taken.

Revelation?

May 27th, 2010
8:44 am

So you ain’t romancing the bros

Pssst.....

May 27th, 2010
8:44 am

And some women wonder why they end up 38 and alone.

“I just can’t seem to find the right guy!”

No, you have defined your life as a “victim” and dumped every decent guy that came along because he lacked (fill in the blank).

Kym-only been up since ohhh 4:00am

May 27th, 2010
8:49 am

Good Morning All,

I have this same condition Wisey. I love Geeky, quirky, smart guys. Not so super geeky..but someone I can have an intelligent conversation with..world events, politics, history, sports..just be able to converse on something other than American Idol.

How important do you think it is to be intellectually matched with someone?

Hmmm while the person doesn’t have to be super smart. I would like to date someone who again..has a higher IQ than cheese. If I ask him about politics..know enough not to say..”Yeah Obeezzy is putting them haters down.”(shout out to the Boondocks) Be willing to embrass learning and know that it is a lifetime process.

How long could you last dating someone just on looks?
To quote one of my favorite comedians..”Stupid is forever!!!”

Lucinda

May 27th, 2010
8:49 am

@ Revelation

????

William

May 27th, 2010
8:49 am

You are difficult to please! Looks are not enough but must have brain power to please you. I can not wait when money does not mean anything. I guess when you get educated love and sex takes on a massive shift.

I am whatever you say I am (I'm off today Bitches!)

May 27th, 2010
8:50 am

Whether they were street smart or book smart, I’ve always dated someone with intelligence.
I have a question for the guys: Are guys intimidated by a women that has more degrees than the guy and a lot of goals on her plate that she is actively trying to accomplish?

Kym-only been up since ohhh 4:00am

May 27th, 2010
8:50 am

spellcheck embrace..learning..my disclaimer..I have been up since 4am.

Kym-only been up since ohhh 4:00am

May 27th, 2010
8:53 am

I will wait a decent amount of time before slapping down the topic change card so we can discuss the Gwinnett Teacher trying to get a baby from the 17 year old.

Randyt (or time to say goodbye to Toothless and head home to the land of "9"s and "10"s)

May 27th, 2010
9:02 am

Simple Answer…Homey don’t do dumb, no way no how. If it is a beautiful shell, but no light behind the eyes, I don’t need her. Intelligent conversation is just as important as “bumping uglies”.

SlimOne...is it Friday yet?

May 27th, 2010
9:04 am

Morning yall..coffee please Dreams.

Um, guess I need to knock on wood because for the most part, I’ve dated intelligent guys. Can’t recall at the moment ever dating an AirHead or Beevis & Butthead type…that wouldn’t even turn me on in the first place. However, there are surely many different levels of “intelligence” as we’ve discussed on here before. I’ve never dated a guy that was President of the Mensa Club but does that mean all others were BIG DUMMIES? (said in my Fred Sanford voice

Jeff

May 27th, 2010
9:06 am

I’ll answer this one for some of the guys. It’s not intimidation of a woman’s brain power. It’s the ego and all that comes with it that some women have when they have a degree and a great paying job. Women tell THEMSELVES that men are intimidated, but that’s so they don’t have to look at their own flaws.

It's me....lurker

May 27th, 2010
9:10 am

Women tell THEMSELVES that men are intimidated

That’s funny….but true

Dan

May 27th, 2010
9:13 am

@Jeff

Just like guys tell THEMSELVES that women don’t like ‘nice’ men….

Let’s agree that self-delusion isn’t limited to gender.

I am whatever you say I am (I'm off today Bitches!)

May 27th, 2010
9:13 am

@ Jeff, I’m humble about my accomplishments.
I only tell about my credentials when asked specifics about them and then I keep it moving.
I’m proud about my accomplishments because they have opened doors for me but I don’t go around with I’m a better than you sign tattoed on my forehead.
I’ll date any guy as long as he has the following traits:
Disease free, heterosexual, single, respectful, honest, ambitious, has goals, enjoys spending time with me, enjoys being around my son

The last guy I dated, I told him I was trying to get into grad school (he asked about my goals) but the minute I took him to my house it’s like he flipped. He actually tripped that I had a house, degree, and that I was making it as a single mother.
What can I say ? I do what is necessary to survive but if I meet a guy that doesn’t hold a degree or a house it doesn’t mean he ranks low on the totem pole.

Trizzle

May 27th, 2010
9:13 am

I just got out of a dating match with someone that could not carry on a conversation to save his life. They were empty and thin at best. Engaging conversation is a must for me. You have to keep my interest and stimulate my mind and in return I will do the same. Doesn’t work with only one person at bat.

To the person that asked about the degrees, I have always had more then any man I’ve ever dated. I think it only bothered one person, the rest didn’t probably think about it past the time of the conversation. What I am lacking to find is someone that is college educated. I think I might have had one. Actually, ya, I had one.

It’s difficult finding exactly what you want if your single. Dating isn’t exactly like going to the grocery store to pick some items up for dinner, it’s more like a menu of ingredients you need to make the perfect meal, finding those ingredients, and then combining them for the perfect recipe!

Trevor0529

May 27th, 2010
9:14 am

Are guys intimidated by a women that has more degrees than the guy and a lot of goals on her plate that she is actively trying to accomplish?

some guys may be intimidated, but I am not. Humble intelligence is sexy.

Good morning all!!

Randyt (or time to say goodbye to Toothless and head home to the land of "9"s and "10"s)

May 27th, 2010
9:17 am

@ Dan and Jeff, you are both right…sometimes. One size does not fit all, so always best to evaluate each on their own individual merits (and demerits ;-)

Three things DO come out quuickly in the investigation phase, 1) is the self absorbed, 2) is she bright, 3) does she have a good heart (tied to #1…or actually untied). Then it is time to stay or time to go.

mqew

May 27th, 2010
9:24 am

Beauty Fades… Dumb is forever – Judge Judy

Kym – My fav legal mind has spoken :-) or actually, she has written…

I’ve had a stupid. Not proud of that at all…. but hey his shyt was off the chain, he was a kinda bad boy and had street smarts enough to pass around… but please, don’t judge me :-)

Melo

May 27th, 2010
9:24 am

I have a question for the guys: Are guys intimidated by a women that has more degrees than the guy and a lot of goals on her plate that she is actively trying to accomplish?

@I am whatever ??

Why do u ask??……..just for infor sake or u got some that u noticed??

Good morning folks!!

I am whatever you say I am (I'm off today Bitches!)

May 27th, 2010
9:29 am

Melo I ask for info sake.
My homeboy told me that mena are turned off by a woman that has a laundry list of things she is trying to accomplish so I’m intruged as well to see what the men have to say.

PrincessNik...exhausted and ready for the long wknd

May 27th, 2010
9:30 am

but if I meet a guy that doesn’t hold a degree or a house it doesn’t mean he ranks low on the totem pole.

^^^I agree with I am on the above. I also like a guy who is intelligent, but intelligence is not limited to “book smart”.

Morrus

May 27th, 2010
9:30 am

Curiously, in a supposed anti-incumbent year, most of the departing are not retiring but seeking higher office. We may recycle more than we replace. The bad news is that a frustrating 114 seats still have but one contestant. Two of them aren’t even incumbents, meaning they will affect state policy without being vetted by voters. And I have to think that we’d be better off if many had run instead for the Legislature — and cut down on the number running unopposed. Georgia’s problems are numerous. They aren’t going away. There’s too much stale thinking at the Capitol, on both sides of the aisle. New voices would be welcome.

DreamsMaterialize

May 27th, 2010
9:31 am

Morning
I like a woman who has broad interests and can discuss them. I like to see that she has some books on the shelf, from Zane to Carter G. Woodson or Marimba Ani. Throw in some math and physics books, and I might have a “hallelujah” moment. lol

(shout out to the Boondocks)
I love this show. I wish this weren’t the last season.

Morning yall..coffee please Dreams.
No problem. How do you like your coffee?

I tell them that I am a science geek with a Biotechnology masters degree.
Question Wise. Your degree is very specialized, and realistically only a few people can really understand what you’ve studied. Most people would need two semesters of coursework just to understand your dumbed-down explanations of biotechnology. Do you find yourself avoiding talking about that, or do you just try to keep it light when you get on the topic of biotechnology?

Dan

May 27th, 2010
9:32 am

@I am

Think about it this way: what does 1 (hustler) + 1 (hustler) equal?

Anything else is someone using ‘new’ math, be afraid. Be very afraid.

PrincessNik...exhausted and ready for the long wknd

May 27th, 2010
9:33 am

Dreams M,

You have any red bull behind the bar?!?

Randyt (or time to say goodbye to Toothless and head home to the land of "9"s and "10"s)

May 27th, 2010
9:34 am

What I run into are women (sure is same for men) who try to act smarter or dumber than they are because of this “fear factor” spoken of here of appearing too ssmart or too dumb. Just be yourself and let the chips fall where thy may…they will eventually anyway.

I am whatever you say I am (I'm off today Bitches!)

May 27th, 2010
9:34 am

hmmmnnnn@ Dan

M.

May 27th, 2010
9:35 am

Jeff +1

=(^.^)=

I am whatever you say I am (I'm off today Bitches!)

May 27th, 2010
9:38 am

better to be a smart ass than a dumb ass

PrincessNik...exhausted and ready for the long wknd

May 27th, 2010
9:38 am

enjoys being around my son

@ I am, at what point do you bring the guy around your son?

DreamsMaterialize

May 27th, 2010
9:40 am

My homeboy told me that mena are turned off by a woman that has a laundry list of things she is trying to accomplish
Why would dudes be turned off by this? I don’t know any dudes who would see that as a minus. The only thing that might turn a guy off about a woman like that is if she was incapable of merging that lifestyle with you when you all got together. We should be trying to accomplish the laundry list together now.

You have any red bull behind the bar?!?
Coming right up.

SexyCool13

May 27th, 2010
9:41 am

I am whatever you say I am (I'm off today Bitches!)

May 27th, 2010
9:44 am

DReams Mat: Perhaps I should be praying for GOD to bring me secure guys

Princess: Only two other guys besides my son’s father have been around my son.
The first guy knew me for years before my son was even conceived.
The second guy really showed me that he was looking for something serious and long term
I trusted my judgement in introducing him to my son and I still have no regrets.

SexyCool13

May 27th, 2010
9:45 am

It is a requirement that I am involved with someone who possesses some book smarts combined with good old fashioned common sense, throw in a measure of emotional intelligence and top it off with a sense of humor.

I also admire above average intelligence and think *genius* is sexy.

However, if you are constantly beating me over the DAmN head about how fckn smart you are, well, that sht is tiresome and a turn-off.

Haywood Jablome

May 27th, 2010
9:46 am

as long a broad’s big brain can be matched with equally raunchy sluttiness, she’s fine.

but just intelligence and average sex – boring!

PrincessNik...exhausted and ready for the long wknd

May 27th, 2010
9:47 am

We should be trying to accomplish the laundry list together now.

DreamsM, that is my thought also, the dude that is turned off by a woman with a laundry list of things she is trying to accomplish is the dude who probably has no goals of his own.

Melo

May 27th, 2010
9:48 am

@Iam whatever??

intimidated and turned off are two(2) different thangs.

If u blarb on AND ON about ur home and degree(s), two minutes after ur meeting somebody, or as u trying to consumate the relationship and go on and on about how ur high office stressess the heck outta u,yada yada yada…most men will be turned off…..not intimidated per see.

Leave ur degree certificates at home and not pin them on ur forehead and just talk about what we gon do….and when we gon phluckk.. :lol:

U be just fine!

If degrees/jobs etc have to come up,it has to be in the course of a relevant discourse..not outta the blue just because …

However,check this..some females who are bookish..multiple degrees types may fail to relate and lack street smarts coz they are too removed from the street happenings. Some dudes may avoid them coz such pple tend to be naive smtimes and bringing themk up to speed may not appeal to those guys coz oif how uneducated those chics are on some street aspects of dating etc……they are also easily taken advantage of……

They are likely to peddle the “intimadating” point without realizing the real truf….

Educated chics do intimidate some Dumb dudes tho,thats for sure!! :lol:

Hey folks!!

SexyCool13

May 27th, 2010
9:50 am

Kym – *Topic Change Card* – For some reason that reminded me of a game of UNO!
LOL!

PrincessNik...exhausted and ready for the long wknd

May 27th, 2010
9:50 am

I am, I was just curious, I wasn’t trying to be judgemental or anything. As a single mom myself i’m always curious about other single parents and how much they allow their s/o to interact with their children prior to the strong possiblity of a serious longterm/lifetime relationship.

DreamsMaterialize

May 27th, 2010
9:50 am

DReams Mat: Perhaps I should be praying for GOD to bring me secure guys
I am you don’t have pray for that because GOD already has done or will do that. Instead, pray for the discernment to recognize the guy that GOD will send or that GOD has already placed there.

SlimOne...is it Friday yet?

May 27th, 2010
9:54 am

‘How do you like your coffee?’

Dreams – nearly black (only a few drops of cream) with about 4 sugars…

Some Sense

May 27th, 2010
9:54 am

Dating – worse, marrying – below your intellectual level is a train wreck waiting to happen.

People who value learning and understanding what intellectual curiosity and growth and love of learning mean just know stuff, and part of that “stuff” is knowing how to be happy and knowing how to make appropriate decisions and exercise proper judgment.

This is how so many high school age girls go astray…aligning themselves with with old “hairy legged boys” who only know Redneck Foreplay, “Get in the back of the truck, bitch.”

Smokey

May 27th, 2010
9:55 am

How Crazy is it that I speak with a lot of intellect and I get the Phrase that I act white, WTF…?

Just because I throw out the book smarts and don’t hang my pants off my ass…

PrincessNik...exhausted and ready for the long wknd

May 27th, 2010
9:57 am

“hairy legged boys” who only know Redneck Foreplay, “Get in the back of the truck, bitch.”

:lol: :lol: :lol: that tickled me, maybe i’m just tired :shock:

AmazonRed™ - Ready for some Sex and a City

May 27th, 2010
10:02 am

Morning all –

WiseDiva does a great job, but this topic is a frequent repeat. Nothing more for me to say on it.

Can’t wait to hit the movies tonight!!!!

Malik

May 27th, 2010
10:04 am

This topic struck me as so coincidental as it is at the heart of my current love-hate relationship. I am college educated, my girl is not. I have a professional job, my girl does not. We have good chemistry, lots of fun together and a great physical relationship. Since I was raised by a stay at home mom I suppose I have old fashion values and a womans job or how much money she made has never been an issue.
The problem is she has poor reasoning skills and thinks that her emotions or how she feels is the most important aspect to conflict resolution. The obvious issue is that I am alot more intelligent than she is. She finds inteligent discussion irritating. Is it possible to ever find an intelligent woman that I am attracted to?

Luvbug

May 27th, 2010
10:05 am

If your romantic interest is not as smart as you think you are, and that’s a major determining factor for a long term relationship with you, then who can blame you for not staying. Do what you think is best.

But as it relates to relationships (on average…who’s chosen and not chosen)…keep in mind that a lot of “dumb” people are successfully connecting with other folks and a lot of “superiorly smart” folks are not.

Now, maybe their intelligence is too supreme to match…or maybe smart and dumb (or trash and treasure) are not as concrete as some might think.

I am whatever you say I am (I'm off today Bitches!)

May 27th, 2010
10:06 am

Melo, if you would learn how to read you would see that my earlier posts states that I am humble with my accoplishments. I don’t go on and on about them.