accessAtlanta

City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Put a (big?) ring on it

I’m not one of those women who dreamed about their wedding day since childhood.  I’m sure I pictured having a family at some point but weddings and engagements just didn’t seem on my radar.  I remember when one of my friends got engaged last year and she was sort of horrified at the way her then boyfriend proposed. She was even more disappointed in the size of the ring.  I found it odd because she didn’t seem the type to get hung up on this kind of thing.

How important is the ring and the proposal, though?  When you are watching the person you (hopefully!) love spill out their heart and risk the ultimate rejection, is their ring selection really an issue?    A lot of my male friends tell me that if their woman even uttered a complaint about their engagement ring, it’s going back to the store. Not sure if they have found themselves in this situation but if it happened, I think they mean it!

Ladies, would the size of an engagement ring make a difference when you know they can afford something bigger and more elaborate?

What is the protocol when the ring becomes an issue? Ignore it? Discuss it? How do you handle it?

490 comments Add your comment

Raqi...142,127,65,C,66

May 24th, 2010
3:13 pm

kimmie and Ared, you all know that works with having kids too. My oldest bff was joking the other day about if she was not going thru menopause now she would find some new friends. Between the 4 of us, three have babies 2 and under. LOL

AmazonRed™

May 24th, 2010
3:16 pm

kimmie and Ared, you all know that works with having kids too.

Quiet lady. :lol:

The one who just got married will be trying within a year. She’s 33 and her womb is weeping. :lol:

Fortunately, the other married one in the clique is childless by choice. My idol! :lol:

kimmie

May 24th, 2010
3:19 pm

I’ll try to make friends with natives if I can ever find any. I heard they were an urban legend.

I am – It’s sort of an exclusive club, but we’re here! A lot have gone other places to work & moved back. All very cool people. Wouldn’t trade my “homies” for the world!

Melo

May 24th, 2010
3:20 pm

Any “free” events happening in the city Memorial weekend??

I am whatever you say I am

May 24th, 2010
3:21 pm

if there are any natives that want to induct me into their exclusive club..hit me up

AmazonRed™

May 24th, 2010
3:22 pm

Atlanta Jazz Festival, melo

Raqi...142,127,65,C,66

May 24th, 2010
3:23 pm

Then you better keep your guy away from those new daddies. LOL

But it’s all good because we being friends are all pretty much within the same lifestyles. Early 40’s, raising kids, liking the same type things. My oldest bff says she likes being the “auntie” of them all. LOL She does have two boys 13 and 15. But besides that she likes being the older woman of the group that will babysit for an hour or so if we need her to. But only one child at a time. LOL

As you know I am a grandmother but I hardly ever see that little rascal these days.

Melo

May 24th, 2010
3:23 pm

A BUSINESSMAN who promised to marry a 21-year-old woman, then took away her virginity, has been hit with a US$45,000 lawsuit for breaking the promise.

Rumbidzai Gwese is demanding US$15,000 damages from Kevin Mahlangu, 34, for a breach of a promise to marry, a further US$15,000 for sexual abuse and a similar amount for risk of being infected with HIV.

The Hwange businessman has 10 days, starting on Wednesday last week, to enter an appearance to defend with the Bulawayo High Court to avoid a default judgement against him.

The Sunday News reports that Mahlangu and Gwese met in February, with the former promising to marry the young woman who was still a virgin.

On March 5 this year, Gwese claims in her affidavit, Mahlangu asked her to go and sleep at his house.

“At the house, Mahlangu promised that he would marry me if I consented to have sexual intercourse with him,” she says.

The pair went on to have sex four times that night, and Gwese lost her virginity.

On March 13, the pair travelled to Victoria Falls and had sex on three occasions on their return to Gwese’s Baobab Hill house in Hwange, Gwese adds.

Four days later, Mahlangu went to meet Gwese’s uncle — once again allegedly promising to marry her.

Mahlangu was told that because Gwese had slept at his house twice, having sexual intercourse with him, “he was compelled to take her as his wife as he had done so before he had notified any of Gwese’s relatives”, the Sunday News reported.

Gwese moved in with Mahlangu and they had sex “day in day out as and when he felt. On all the occasions, Mahlangu had unprotected sex with Gwese,” court papers say.

The affair ended abruptly on May 13 when Mahlangu “chased Gwese away” from his house.

AmazonRed™

May 24th, 2010
3:25 pm

Then you better keep your guy away from those new daddies. LOL

Seriously. In addition, my 4 month old niece was visiting this weekend. They really took to each other.

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
3:25 pm

@Melo, Jazz Festival @Piedmont Park. The following weekend is Kiss 104.1 family reunion at Stone Mountain Park with The S.O.S. Band (Free)!

Raqi...142,127,65,C,66

May 24th, 2010
3:27 pm

Amazon, that’s how it starts. LOL

czBrat

May 24th, 2010
3:27 pm

kimmie, i like that my kids are georgia peaches. they, however, consider themselves floridians.

as for associations, we have a great mix of singles and couples. i often wish i had some girlfriends my age because my sisters and bff are much older than me, and my nieces are younger. i’m in a bit of limbo when it comes to having women my age to hang out with.

czBrat

May 24th, 2010
3:27 pm

yeah leggs!! looking forward to both!

JtJ

May 24th, 2010
3:29 pm

@Leggs-That’s what we just did, we just bought a new home and agreed to pull of the wedding for $5000. It can be done and will be done for $5000 or less. I have so many associates and a few family members who are still paying for their wedding years later. I used to work for RaceTrac corporate office and a girl that worked with us had a lavish destination wedding with a bridal shower at a fancy hotel. They were spending over $75K for everything and were paying for their families airline tickets and all. The girl admitted that they did not have the money and were living check to check as it was, but they were charging most of it on thier credit cards and using all of their savings.—->I totally don’t get it. Why put yourself in debt to show off to people??Why?

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
3:30 pm

@czB ~ making a list of things to place in my picnic basket.

Melo

May 24th, 2010
3:31 pm

@Leggs/Ared !!

thanx!

the kiss one is right outa my back yard. LOL

im a cheap one,like Dan!

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA LEROY LOVING

May 24th, 2010
3:32 pm

Ok… Just had a convo with my Team Mate.. He thinks the Muslim Faith is the end of the world to be.. He is a card carrying FOX news quoting republican.. He thinks the Muslim faith is a violent one but had no response about the Christian Crusades. I finally shut him up with this.. What would Jesus do? Jesus would love them inspite of themselves. Jesus loved the Jews and they killed him.. Jesus would love a Muslim inspite of themselves.. Remember the “forgive them Father” verse… I told him if you have a relationship with your Lord and Savior Jesus Christ then you cant hate anyone.. Which is it? Do you hate them cause if you do you cant be a Christian.. Or you must be faking your Christianity because Jesus would love them inspite of themselves.. People are so funny when theyre being condescending and only look at one side of the equation.. Sorry had to get that out..

AmazonRed™

May 24th, 2010
3:34 pm

Amazon, that’s how it starts. LOL

Right. :lol: He’s reminded it must “start” with a ring tho. :lol: I’m okay with procreation after that.

abc

May 24th, 2010
3:34 pm

It’s a pretty lightweight lineup at the Jazz Fest. Diane Shuur is good, but a singer — how much jazz can a singer sing? Not to diss singing too much, but, not much… Marcus Miller and Stanley Clarke are not quite jazz, really, and both bass players — limited appeal; everyone else isn’t jazz at all! WTF!!

There is no such thing as straight-ahead Jazz in this city. Par for the course I guess. It’s like folks don’t even know what jazz is anymore.

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
3:36 pm

“…but they were charging most of it on thier credit cards and using all of their savings.—->I totally don’t get it. Why put yourself in debt to show off to people??Why?”

MY EXACT SENTIMENT. You could have pulled off the best wedding in the history of weddings, but you’re still broke at the end of the day. Is the image you’re trying to convey really worth it. Apparently, to some it is.

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA LEROY LOVING

May 24th, 2010
3:37 pm

Sorry for the inspite of themselves response so many times.. I think I finally got thru to the old Dude.. He calls Obama a Muslim which doesnt bother me because I know whats up but it trips me out that a person could only see one way and there is so much more to the equation… I think Im getting thru because he was completely quiet and that has never happened before.. Like he was really thinking about what I said.. Dang..

Melo

May 24th, 2010
3:38 pm

It’s like folks don’t even know what jazz is anymore

@abc??

why dont u go play then..u the jazz purist??

abc

May 24th, 2010
3:40 pm

Hey, if there weren’t rich people throwing $100K wedding parties at their 40,000 SF mansions, I’d be coming up short of gigs. You haven’t seen wastes of money until you see the bride jump off the grotto into the pool wearing a $10K minimum gown. Followed by the entire wedding party. When the gown costs $10-20K, paying that much for the band doesn’t seem like such a big deal. Bless ‘em!

Gorgeous Green Eyes

May 24th, 2010
3:41 pm

Of course, you know I ALWAYS picked the ring out…….5 times…..If I am wearing it they knew they wanted me to be happy…because then they would be happy……:)

czBrat

May 24th, 2010
3:42 pm

and the caribbean festival/parade is this saturday, so i’ll be there too!

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
3:42 pm

@Melo ~ there’s a difference in being cheap and being practical…

abc

May 24th, 2010
3:43 pm

Melo, I don’t do clubs, I don’t tour anymore, I don’t have much visibility. I play regional concerts and private parties, and I’m happy with that. I haven’t even gone to the Atlanta Jazz Festival in over a decade. It’s not a jazz crowd. A bit of a dangerous scene, as I recall, an unsavory lot. Besides, if nobody wants to hear straight-ahead, as evidenced by the lineup, what would they want to have to do with me? No biggie!

kimmie

May 24th, 2010
3:44 pm

DK – Some of these hypocrites really trip me out. You got him to thinking tho.

Lady J

May 24th, 2010
3:44 pm

peeking back in….hmmmmmmm…….sigh….lol

leggs two great live music weekends are coming up can’t wait!!!!!!!

GGE too damn funny 5 times…..geesh now that may support his theory…..lol

czBrat

May 24th, 2010
3:46 pm

AND the screen on the greens are starting next week … AND we gotta do a couple of jazz fridays at the aquarium! YAY SUMMER!!

Melo

May 24th, 2010
3:47 pm

THE INFAMOUS??

i hear what u say..my qstion tho is :why do the peaceful muslims get over powered and shouted down by the violent ones?? whats up with that.

how come we dont hear the peaceful muslims speak against the violent ones, like we do when folks(here) get tired of violent gang crimes.

ha??

like in some parts of africa and asia,some folks dont like america coz of imperialism and its whole foreing policy but they dont resort to violence…whats up with those muslims who do…..and how come they find(violent muslims) succor in their home environments unless america puts pressure on them??

IDK??

mytw♥cents

May 24th, 2010
3:49 pm

I know of two couples who got engaged this wknd and the brides to be seem pleased as punch with their new jewelry though they’re quite different. I’m sure as long as personality is accounted for, most ladies are pleased. The one guy said he was getting her a princess cut cuz it’s most common :( and it’s 1.25 cuz it’s what he can afford :) . By the looks of the teary eyed pics, it works for her…

If/when I’m at that juncture I’ll probably be back from the getaway spot before the memo is even sent out. I’m into the intimacy of the moment being shared with only a select few. Doubt it’d shock anyone who knows me well.

kimmie

May 24th, 2010
3:49 pm

Well give me the “fake” jazz then, I have no problem with it, it’s all music and entertainment and it’s FREE!

Lady J

May 24th, 2010
3:50 pm

czBrat I wanna catch jazz fridays at the aquarium…….screen on the green is thursday and that is out…..I think I am officially going to catch WWD wednesday since I am of and can get there in time for free parking….lol

Lady J

May 24th, 2010
3:50 pm

me either kimmie! lol

AmazonRed™

May 24th, 2010
3:51 pm

AND the screen on the greens are starting next week …

The first movie this week…on Thursday.

Melo

May 24th, 2010
3:52 pm

I haven’t even gone to the Atlanta Jazz Festival in over a decade

@abc??

so in a decade,u think u STILL have ur ear to the ground as far as jazz music or u lost ur touch on whats happening out there??

AmazonRed™

May 24th, 2010
3:53 pm

Well give me the “fake” jazz then, I have no problem with it, it’s all music and entertainment and it’s FREE!

:idea:

It’s true. I could not care less about jazz. If the music is good, I’m down. Love outdoor concerts.

Melo

May 24th, 2010
3:54 pm

caribbean festival/parade is this saturday, so i’ll be there too!

@czBrat??

is it raunchy or its kids friendly??

coz i wldnt want to do “strokkers in the street” with my kids in tow! :lol:

Lady J

May 24th, 2010
3:54 pm

say it again ARed….Love outdoor concerts

speaking of which I nned to hit Tuesday Morning for another basket and accessories! YAY!

AmazonRed™

May 24th, 2010
3:55 pm

Strokers. in. the. street.

melo!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

I am whatever you say I am

May 24th, 2010
3:56 pm

question: anyone ever loved anyone that didn’t love them back?

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
3:57 pm

“…a pretty lightweight lineup at the Jazz Fest.” Not really jazz, jazz here sucks, etc….

@abc ~ what makes this “lightweight” is the fact that it’s FREE!!! (lol)

I am whatever you say I am

May 24th, 2010
3:58 pm

if there are any natives that want to induct me into their exclusive club..hit me up

I meant that in a way if anyone is looking to expand their friend circle.
I’m looking for new friends since it seems mine keep moving out of state

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
3:58 pm

@kimmie ~ I see we said the same thing!

kimmie

May 24th, 2010
3:58 pm

I am – Yeah, but I didn’t let them know it!

Never let em see u sweat!

abc

May 24th, 2010
3:58 pm

Discourse on what constitutes Jazz is probably beyond the scope of the blog. But, yes, I still know what Jazz is, and what’s on the lineup at Atlanta Jazz Fest is mostly not Jazz. But, that’s okay, that’s not different from lots of venues these days.

I used to play the Atlanta Music Fest and all that, before I moved to Atlanta, in the local clubs, all that. I stopped. Getting into technology finally made it too hard to keep up with all the hours, anyway.

abc

May 24th, 2010
3:59 pm

And sure, free is my favorite brand, too! But I’ll avoid the Jazz Fest, thanks!

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
3:59 pm

@Melo ~ leave your kids home because it is strokers in the streets!

For Real (Ask the right ? and you will get the right answer)

May 24th, 2010
3:59 pm

What up blog fam!

On weddings and rangs: (Rangs) Take what I offer or do both of us a favor and don’t. (Weddings) Like I said before “The faster you get ole girl out fantasy land and into reality the better the relationship will be.” It’s starts at the wedding and it doesn’t matter who is paying for it.

Awwwwww I am don’t have any friends. Somebody hold my mule, come here I am I’ll be your friend.

DK: You have to understand with people like that it has nothing to do with religon and belief. Some people just need somebody to be mad at, blame, fight with, feel superior to etc… to justify what missing in their life. Funny thing tho, if they had Jesus in their life none of the other stuff would matter.