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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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Put a (big?) ring on it

I’m not one of those women who dreamed about their wedding day since childhood.  I’m sure I pictured having a family at some point but weddings and engagements just didn’t seem on my radar.  I remember when one of my friends got engaged last year and she was sort of horrified at the way her then boyfriend proposed. She was even more disappointed in the size of the ring.  I found it odd because she didn’t seem the type to get hung up on this kind of thing.

How important is the ring and the proposal, though?  When you are watching the person you (hopefully!) love spill out their heart and risk the ultimate rejection, is their ring selection really an issue?    A lot of my male friends tell me that if their woman even uttered a complaint about their engagement ring, it’s going back to the store. Not sure if they have found themselves in this situation but if it happened, I think they mean it!

Ladies, would the size of an engagement ring make a difference when you know they can afford something bigger and more elaborate?

What is the protocol when the ring becomes an issue? Ignore it? Discuss it? How do you handle it?

490 comments Add your comment

I am whatever you say I am

May 24th, 2010
4:38 pm

Leggs when we were together, I would say I love you and he would say I love you too or he would say I love you and I would say love you too.

Now the response I get when I say I love you is I appreciate it.

kimmie

May 24th, 2010
4:38 pm

Saying I love you to someone you have romantic feelings for is a huge deal to me. Unrequited love is the worst feeling in the world.

i think I am needs to get her self esteem right be4 taking any more steps with dudes…

Melo – I agree, but we’ve talked about this on the blog until we were blue in the face. They have to decide for themselves.

I am whatever you say I am

May 24th, 2010
4:39 pm

anyway……I’m done.
It’s a wrap. I said deuces and this time I mean it when I say I’m threw.

On a postive note: It’s summer time and we all know that new dudes are out in full effect during summer :-)

Melo

May 24th, 2010
4:39 pm

The dude that is in question is the same dude (the ex)

@I am..yeah,assumed coz the info was incomplete.

but it has been a long time since..u stil pining on him still??

Melo

May 24th, 2010
4:40 pm

I love you

I appreciate it.!

Priceless…………..at least hes polite! :lol:

kimmie

May 24th, 2010
4:40 pm

I am – I thought you all were finished already, that he told you he found someone who better met his needs! He didn’t meet you that day when you were going to give him back his stuff!

Don’t know what to say.

I’m out gang, holla!

I am whatever you say I am

May 24th, 2010
4:41 pm

Actually, I feel a hell of a lot better that I got some things off my chest to dude.
for me, whenever I get that way, it’s a wrap. it means that I have closed and locked a door and I will never go back to that.
My priority right now is building my friend circle and focusing on my bible. and when I say friends I mean true friends that can be my girls.

DreamsMaterialize

May 24th, 2010
4:42 pm

Hey Everyone! I hope everyone had a good Monday.

Discourse on what constitutes Jazz is probably beyond the scope of the blog.
abc substitute “Jazz” with the respective profession of any blog member, and that statement would still be true. Why not just give a few lessons on or examples of what you consider to be jazz, rather than lambaste everyone for not knowing what it is? If you don’t know, you don’t know, but you can always learn. Maybe people at the Jazz Fest actually would like to hear “real” jazz if it were presented to them. Sometimes you have to give the people something they didn’t know they liked.

Professor...

May 24th, 2010
4:42 pm

Well I told this guy “thank you” when he told me he loved me…after that things were never the same.

I am whatever you say I am

May 24th, 2010
4:43 pm

Kimmie, he actually told me face to face that he was sorry for his actions. At the time he presented himself very geniune because he wasn’t trying an alterior move.
I accepted his apology but I can’t be friends with him. It hurts to much.

czBrat

May 24th, 2010
4:43 pm

i’m back. melo’s right … it bounced. but i see the correction. yes prof, you can arrive before 7 and stay for the jazz & drinkypoo. i got you too melo.

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
4:43 pm

@I am ~ honestly my first remark when I read your 4:36 was OMG!

You seem to love throwing yourself into the flame. Out of everything that has gone down why you telling dude you love him. Esp since you do, keep that stuff to yourself. His response has said it all, it’s up to you if you want to hear it. He’s not interested in you and if you let him he will chew you up and spit you out. Next you’ll be wondering what did you do let this man walk all over you. Didn’t he tell you he meant someone better for him (well, he did say it with meaner words). Walk away from this dude and lick your wounds before moving on. It has happened to all of us, sorry to say, but almost like a negative “rite of passage!”

Professor...

May 24th, 2010
4:45 pm

@I am I thinking getting a good support system of friends in place is good. I don’t even have to say how great it is you are focusing on the Bible as well. IMO there is something soothing and relaxing when I read the Word. Good luck to you ma…I know everything will workout.

Let me know if you need my contact info.

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
4:45 pm

@I am ~ you’re not through. Out of everything that went down with the key and him finding someone else and basically dogging you out, you said you were done then. Take care of yourself first…you’re not ready and stop pining for this joker. I know easier said than done, but he’s done some things that it should be a little easier by now!

SlimOne...Single Sex in the City

May 24th, 2010
4:46 pm

What has 4 wheels and flies?

Melo

May 24th, 2010
4:47 pm

thanx Czbrat!

DreamsMaterialize

May 24th, 2010
4:47 pm

What has 4 wheels and flies?
A wagon full of shyte.

I am whatever you say I am

May 24th, 2010
4:48 pm

Thanks for the support professor. that means a lot .
I’m real excited about the new church I started going to.
The people seem more eager to meet you as opposed to other churches I have been where you are just a number.

Yesterday at church, a nice young lady introduced herself to me and her friends. I felt very welcomed!

Professor...

May 24th, 2010
4:48 pm

@I am sometimes you can’t be friends if the love is still there. You will set yourself up for thinking everything will get back to “normal” and the next thing you know he will be dating and saying I am we are just friends and your heart will be laid out like a chicken liver in some hot azz grease.

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
4:48 pm

Wait, don’t you need wings to fly? (haa)

Melo

May 24th, 2010
4:50 pm

Leggs/Proff??

chics like I am are the reason why some dudes hold their dycckks in such high regard and put them on pics!

look at her opining for it!?? :lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :???:

I am whatever you say I am

May 24th, 2010
4:50 pm

Leggs you don’t know me like I know myself.
Please believe me when I say I’m done.
up until now, I have never wanted to kick him in the biscuits.
It’s a wrap if I want to kick you in the biscuits

Dig That

May 24th, 2010
4:50 pm

I am- Let’s face it. He got you and you are not the first and won’t be the last, you said it right tho, focus on you. This is the time to get in touch with the real you and when you find her then the right man will find you. You probably do love him and just said to see if he says I love you too boo.

Melo

May 24th, 2010
4:51 pm

Leggs..u wre right…. :lol:

its a bravado thang..i get it now! :lol:

Dig That

May 24th, 2010
4:52 pm

<–covering the biscuits. Watch them kicks I am.

Professor...

May 24th, 2010
4:53 pm

@ I am…I really mean it. I will probably be off the blog the next two days due to meetings and hearings, but Melo or Lady J can give you my email addy.

Take good care of yourself.

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
4:53 pm

@Melo ~ she isn’t opining…well, maybe she is. She’s definitlely given us her opinion. (LOL)

SlimOne...Single Sex in the City

May 24th, 2010
4:53 pm

Dreams – you were close….a garbage truck..LOL

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
4:54 pm

@ I am ~ of course I don’t know you like you do. Just going by what you post…it’s all good. You know what to do. But you knew then what to do! I gotch!

I am whatever you say I am

May 24th, 2010
4:54 pm

Hey Professor!!!

I would like to hang if it is cool with you.
you are good peeps.

dig that: I know myself and I know what I want. Nuff said.

DreamsMaterialize

May 24th, 2010
4:55 pm

Dreams – you were close….a garbage truck..LOL
Yeah baby! So is there a prize?

Dig That

May 24th, 2010
4:57 pm

For the sake of just dropping it, OK. Yeah professor give her ur email addy. She needs a friend right now.

Professor...

May 24th, 2010
4:59 pm

@I am…anytime chas18c6@gmail.com just hit me up…

I am whatever you say I am

May 24th, 2010
5:00 pm

nite blog!!!
have a good one!

SlimOne...Single Sex in the City

May 24th, 2010
5:00 pm

Yeah, you get to drive it home….LOL!

Nitey Nite all!

Leggs

May 24th, 2010
5:01 pm

“Remember, no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt (dedicated to i am)!!

Nite!

Blondie

May 24th, 2010
5:19 pm

People, listen. Moissanite is the way to go. Men can get ladies a huge sparkly rock without breaking the bank – and even jewelers can’t tell the difference anymore. You can have your cake and a house too, lol.

Frankly, I care more about the way he proposes than anything – I want something romantic/intimate that reflects our love. But, I’m convinced that when that big relationship comes along for me – that we’ll have gone ring browsing in advance so that he knows what I like style-wise :)

Rachel

May 24th, 2010
10:35 pm

I’ve been married for six (6) years and I do not have a ring.
My husband proposed to me without a ring,
We got married without a ring.
Never wanted one. The ring doesn’t mean anything to me.
Ladies don’t get married for a RING.

lucky

May 24th, 2010
10:54 pm

My husband bought the platinum setting for a dimond that I owned for 30 years. Jeweler said it was perfect diamond(small, imperceptible occulsion!) Diamond about n.75C worth $8000.Platinum setting about $3000.It’s beautiful!!

LMaddy

May 25th, 2010
1:10 am

Most of the women I know that complain about ring size are….SINGLE. Unfortunately, it takes marriage for a woman to see that a ring is the LAST thing she should be worried about. Marriage is hard, to hell with a “big” ring! If you are worried about the ring, I can already tell that you really aren’t thinking about things clearly.