Dating interrupted: Why women need male friends
I have a small group of male friends that I consider like brothers. I’ve known them long enough to trust their judgment and definitely listen to their advice on dating! I don’t always like what they say, and I definitely don’t always love the way they say it. These guys mean well but they aren’t real big on tact. It’s pretty straight, no chaser kind of feedback I get from them.
When I asked one of them to go to the Nightline Face-Off debate earlier this month, I somehow got a dating lecture. Vince didn’t understand why I needed to go to any debate/forum about relationships. He seemed to think that a lot of women (read: me) sabotage our own chances with potential matches because we don’t like being happy.
I, of course don’t agree and prepared an impressive rebuttal with evidence of my concerted efforts to get coupled up. He counter argues (he’s finishing law school, a clear advantage over me) with my line up past of seedy characters and bad selections.
In my defense, I truly believe that I haven’t had major dating misadventures in the last three years. At the same time, Vince made me wonder about the little things I subconsciously do that probably are counterproductive. Such as having a crazy busy schedule and not making time for the time-worthy men I meet.
This is why it is good to have boy “space” friends. Ladies, they call you on your stuff when you need it. They do not sugarcoat no matter how much you threaten them using blackmail. Do you have people in your life who you trust to give you sage advice? I don’t just mean dating advice, but self-improvement in general? How did you come to trust this person so much?
Who do you seek out when you aren’t able to recognize the bad dating habits that are interrupting your dating life? I recall dating a man that literally had no close friends. At the time, I found it really odd but I think men are totally different in that they don’t require the same friendship connections that women do. What do you think?
Guys, do you have little to no male friends you consider your to be in your “inner circle”? Is it pretty common for a man to have no close friends? How healthy can that be emotionally? Or do you guys even think of that kind of thing?
One disclaimer about having boy “space” friends: Do not. I repeat. Do NOT ask them about sex. Men bring a totally new meaning to the phrase TMI (too much information) on that topic.
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467 comments Add your comment
Leggs
April 28th, 2010
2:44 pm
@Melo ~ it’s co¢k block….
Melo
April 28th, 2010
2:45 pm
@lEGGS??
I heard more crickets when we were talking about the big wide Boston tunnel and women!
why is that??
Leggs
April 28th, 2010
2:45 pm
@InfamousD ~ he has no idea what a “ruckus” really is around here.
Carlito
April 28th, 2010
2:46 pm
Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another ‘Economic Stimulus’ payment. This is indeed a very exciting program, and I’ll explain it by using a Q & A format:
Q. What is an ‘Economic Stimulus’ payment?
A. It’s money the federal government will send to taxpayers.
Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.
Q So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen of it.
Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a High-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.
Q But isn’t that stimulating the economy of China?
A. Shut up.
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. Economy by spending your stimulus check wisely. If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China or Sri Lanka. If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs. If you purchase a computer, it will go to India, Taiwan, or China. If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Chili, Honduras, and Guatemala. If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea. If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan. If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore. Instead, keep the money in America by:
1) Spending it at yard sales, or
2) Going to ball games, or
3) Spending it on prostitutes, or
4) Beer or
5) Tattoos.
(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S.)
Conclusion: Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day!
No need to thank me, I’m just glad I could be of help.
Trevor0529
April 28th, 2010
2:46 pm
@DK,
Thanks for the words.
You guys are a trip!!
Melo
April 28th, 2010
2:46 pm
cock as in wang??
Leggs
April 28th, 2010
2:47 pm
@Melo ~ if dicussion turned to the “big wide Boston tunnel” we would wind up talking about sluts!
Carlito
April 28th, 2010
2:47 pm
Infamous, Thanks. I have to get my sleeve finished.
Trevor0529
April 28th, 2010
2:48 pm
I am going to enjoy my stay in MIA-land.
i'm swiss
April 28th, 2010
2:48 pm
@ Carlito — I got the following tattooed on the Matterhorn when I got married:
“This wang is the sole property of [Mrs. Swiss]. Any re-use, re-broadcast or re-transmission of this wang without the expressed, written consent of [Mrs. Swiss] is strictly prohibited.”
Melo
April 28th, 2010
2:49 pm
Go to a ball game with a tattooed Woman you met on MIA and drink beer all day!
Leggs
April 28th, 2010
2:49 pm
@Melo ~ yes, did I misread your post???
Lady J-I love music, any kind of music......
April 28th, 2010
2:49 pm
LMBAO! I was really into that list and realized it was you carlito! LOL
AmazonRed™
April 28th, 2010
2:50 pm
@ARed ~ you can’t comment for others. You have no idea why they threw crickets. You only know why YOU threw crickets.
Leggs – You commented for others. Or at least took a guess. Well so did I.
And since I’m one of those people who has that divorce viewpoint you mentioned I know why ONE of those people were crickets. So my “idea” is much closer than yours would be since you don’t have such a viewpoint.
julian
April 28th, 2010
2:51 pm
@SexyCool I was jus asking cuz she was asking me why he’d be interested. Like, duh, she’s female is why…but she didn’t like that answer so I though some woould have a better idea than me
Leggs
April 28th, 2010
2:51 pm
@Trevor0529 ~ you’ve been lurking enough so you know all about the blog vests….CATCH!
Carlito
April 28th, 2010
2:52 pm
Swiss, all of that on less than ten inches. Impressive, must be fine print. LOL
Leggs
April 28th, 2010
2:52 pm
@Trevor ~ everyone says that….that’s why lurkersville is overcrowded. You think you came over to us on your own volition…sorry dude, they kicked you out!
Leggs
April 28th, 2010
2:53 pm
@i’m swiss ~
Whew, talking about a Big Ego!
julian
April 28th, 2010
2:54 pm
pardon my ignorance, crickets? means what
Trevor0529
April 28th, 2010
2:54 pm
@Leggs,
Blog vests??? Can you fill a brotha in.
Lady J-I love music, any kind of music......
April 28th, 2010
2:54 pm
leggs stop lol
i'm swiss
April 28th, 2010
2:57 pm
WARNING: Really, really gross retort in 5… 4… 3… 2… 1…
@ Carlito — That’s what foreskin is for…
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA LEROY LOVING
April 28th, 2010
2:57 pm
CArlito – Yea I have a sleeve already and my Back done.. Its funny cause usually Im in button up shirts and people only see a smidgen of it..
Oh Yeah City of Ink also.. Holla at Tuki, He’s done most of my work.. If you can get an appt.. 13 roses just did my most recent work… Because I couldnt get an appt with Tuki when I wanted it..
Carlito
April 28th, 2010
2:57 pm
Trevor, just know that one day people will be mean to you then the next all is okay.
Lady J-I love music, any kind of music......
April 28th, 2010
2:58 pm
no news is good news but wonder when my professor will post our grades….hmmmmm
Lady J-I love music, any kind of music......
April 28th, 2010
2:59 pm
alrighty folks be easy…..peace…..
Carlito
April 28th, 2010
2:59 pm
Swiss, LOL
Infamous, City of Ink should be my first choice then?
Leggs
April 28th, 2010
3:00 pm
Ok Ared ~ you may be right, ARed. That’s one reason why there are so many unhappy, cheating, conniving husbands and wives out there. I’d rather be happy and alone, than miserable and married!!
Melo
April 28th, 2010
3:00 pm
Whew, talking about a Big Ego
@Leggs!!
we know u sweat easily,esp around this time…here,wipe that on ur brow!
Julian
crickects is blog silence!
now u ask too many qstions in here here, u end up being asked to pay while on ur back,u looking up the ceiling!
julian
April 28th, 2010
3:03 pm
hellzno Melo, im not playing like that!
AmazonRed™
April 28th, 2010
3:03 pm
I’d rather be happy and alone, than miserable and married!!
Yes Leggs, we know. This horse has been beaten to death. Like I said, didn’t really see the point of bringing it up as NO ONE’S VIEWPOINTS HAVE CHANGED.
Leggs
April 28th, 2010
3:05 pm
@Trevor ~ blog vests are given to all newbies. You are to don your vest when blog bullets (scathing words) come your way. This little ruckus today is nothing, but you may get hit with shrapnel hence the vest!
Carlito
April 28th, 2010
3:05 pm
I am still laughing at Infamous’ joke. LOL
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA LEROY LOVING
April 28th, 2010
3:08 pm
Carlito – Yeah.. Tuki is the truth but 13 Roses is hard core too.. I dont know depends on what style youre looking for.. Tuki is a great artist and the other Guy that I wouldve recommend was Ray at Westend Tattoo.. He moved to Miami recently though.. He was a Hawaiian Dude that mainly did the hawaiian tribal but he was a dope artist and could give you just what you wanted..
Melo
April 28th, 2010
3:09 pm
im not playing like that!
@Julian!!
not playing like what?? why??
u dont have a vagina???!
fronting aint allowed in this MIA joint!
U blog here,u date, u phluck, this is MIA..unless u saying u just dont do missionary!
Then I understand!
Carlito
April 28th, 2010
3:10 pm
Several men are in the locker room
of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man
engages the hands free speaker function and begins
to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to
listen.
MAN:
“Hello”
WOMAN:
“Honey, it’s me. Are you at the club?”
MAN:
“Yes”
WOMAN:
“I am at the mall now and found this
beautiful leather coat. It’s only $1,000. Is it OK
if I buy it?”
MAN:
“Sure, go ahead if you like it that much.”
WOMAN:
“I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the
new 2010 models.. I saw one I really liked.”
MAN:
“How much?”
WOMAN:
“$90,000″
MAN:
“OK, but for that price I want it with all the
options.”
WOMAN:
“Great! Oh, and
one more thing….the house I wanted last year is back on
the market. They’re asking $950,000″
MAN:
“Well, then go ahead and give them an offer of
$900,000. They will probably take it. If not, we can
go the extra 50 thousand if it’s really a pretty good
price.”
WOMAN:
“OK. I’ll see you later! I love you so much!”
MAN:
“Bye! I love you, too.”
The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are staring
at him in astonishment, mouths agape…
He turns and asks: “Anyone know who’s phone this is?”
Carlito
April 28th, 2010
3:15 pm
My jokes kill. Kill the blog. LOL
Melo
April 28th, 2010
3:18 pm
Im glad im circumsised!
no foreskin here….
skin to skin means a whole lot and more!
It's me....lurker
April 28th, 2010
3:19 pm
What’s crackalackin in here? My screen shows I last read on page 2…been in dang meetings and another in 11 minutes
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA LEROY LOVING
April 28th, 2010
3:21 pm
Lurker – Heres your Name… Nu Nu.. You know like the movie.. That Nu Nu..
It's me....lurker
April 28th, 2010
3:23 pm
DK…mmm hmmmm, yep
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA LEROY LOVING
April 28th, 2010
3:23 pm
Julian – Just relax and follow the flow you’ll be good.. You mix with some and clash with others but its still all love most days..
SexyCool
April 28th, 2010
3:23 pm
I like that name. NuNu.
AmazonRed™
April 28th, 2010
3:26 pm
“I’m New New cause I always rock the new, new sh*t. Thank you.”
Carlito
April 28th, 2010
3:26 pm
FOR SALE BY OWNER: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes.
Excellent condition. $1,000 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married
last month. Wife knows every freaking thing.
Carlito
April 28th, 2010
3:28 pm
THE GYNECOLOGIST WHO BECAME A MECHANIC
A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO
Paperwork, and was burned out
Hoping to try another career where Skillful hands would be beneficial;
He decided to become a mechanic
He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes,
Attended diligently, and learned all he could
When the time of the practical exam approached, the gynecologist
Prepared carefully for weeks, and completed the exam with tremendous skill.
When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had
Obtained a score of 150%.
Fearing an error, he called the Instructor, Saying, “I don’t want to
Appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if
There is an error in the grade.
The instructor said, “During the exam, you took the engine apart
Perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark.
You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth
50% of the mark.”
After a pause, the instructor added, “I gave you an extra 50% because
You did it all through the muffler, which I’ve never seen done in my
Entire career”
Professor
April 28th, 2010
3:29 pm
Stepping in and too lazy to catch up!
@Leggs have you decided on what to do with Mr. Viagra? Will you leave him in the FZ, I hope you don’t mind me asking.
@Trevor0529 I see you are still here that is good, but you did mention you lurked for a while so you already know what to expect.
It's me....lurker
April 28th, 2010
3:30 pm
Elijah is taking too long….Nu Nu it is
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA LEROY LOVING
April 28th, 2010
3:31 pm
ARED – Look at her earrings.. It was NuNu..