Will chivalrous expectations last?
I was very happy to make it out to the wonderful Atlanta Film Festival. If you’ve never been, I would definitely recommend it, even if you are not a huge fan of films. There was literally something for everyone, including films/shorts on music, art, comedy, history and many other genres of film were represented. The attendees were as diverse as the films that were featured.
One of the featured shorts that stood out to me in the African American Shorts showcase was Train.
Train (2009) Darius Clark Monroe, Executive Producer
It was a short, yet powerful film about what men go through when they have to decide how to handle difficult situations in regards to chivalry. I am being intentionally vague as not to give away the entire premise, but it made me think hard about what single women expect from men.
If a man is not interested in a woman romantically, we still would expect some sort of chivalry from them. With all the confusing gender roles that can create dating and relationship issues, how will things shift? Will women continue to expect chivalry? If there is a need to step in and take on a protector role, what would you think of a man who does not consider it his duty to act?
When we are all learning the “new gender roles” how do you think we will progress in what we expect from one another? I know none of us have crystal balls, but what is your educated guess considering what you have seen and heard?
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537 comments Add your comment
Lady J-Baby put the work in like a champion......
April 27th, 2010
3:06 pm
get it ms raqi!!!!!!!!! lol
BlackMagicWoman
April 27th, 2010
3:06 pm
Carlito…I am a belly dancer…so it shows in my decor, my jewelry and my personality! So yep…Bollywood!
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA LEROY LOVING
April 27th, 2010
3:07 pm
BMW – Your house sounds like Willy Wonkas Chocolate factory. All you need is oompa lumpas..
lurker
April 27th, 2010
3:07 pm
Seriously, I’m getting a moniker. Some days it’s me some days it ain’t.
AmazonRed™
April 27th, 2010
3:07 pm
Oh that’s cool. Everything said will be interpreted some way by someone. I wish only happiness for the interpreters. Always love and never malice.
Dreams – Seriously what are you talking about? Raqi made an assessment and I agreed with it. No more, no less.
There is no hidden meaning or reading between the lines type of comment. It was simply an agreement with what another poster came up with.
Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)
April 27th, 2010
3:07 pm
How is my favorite island gurl doing?
Heeey Eli….everyting criss an clean with me….seen?!
lurker
April 27th, 2010
3:07 pm
Let me go back and skim through pages 2,3,4
kimmie-livin my golden life
April 27th, 2010
3:08 pm
Lady J – I have a little patio off the kitchen, but no real deck. My SO has a nice deck though.
Girl, I understand the “house fever”! It will happen for you! I remember when I got the fever. Once I got it, I started packing, even before I got approved for the home loan. I said “I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m getting the heck out of here”! Everything about the apartment started to irritate me! Friends would say “why don’t you hang up that picture?” I would say no, I don’t want to get too comfortable. In a few months, I was OUT & in my house!
AmazonRed™
April 27th, 2010
3:08 pm
BMW – Your house sounds like Willy Wonkas Chocolate factory. All you need is oompa lumpas..
Kym
April 27th, 2010
3:09 pm
@Leggs..I didn’t get a evite..when is this shindig..and where.
lurker
April 27th, 2010
3:09 pm
Today it ain’t been me….not that anyone cares about “lurker” LOL
AmazonRed™
April 27th, 2010
3:09 pm
Seriously, I’m getting a moniker. Some days it’s me some days it ain’t.
That’s why it was funny when you went off on Professor yesterday. She wasn’t even talking about you in particular. You definitely should get another moniker. “lurker” is the most unoriginal one out there.
Carlito
April 27th, 2010
3:11 pm
lurker, please do get a moniker
Some day I thought you were just rude until I found out that is what people do. LOL
BlackMagicWoman, I bet you are a hoot. LOL I just got my home the way I like it now all of it is about to change. I told her do not mess with my basement and we are great. I just have to find a way to let my dogs kill her cats and we are good to go.
Leggs
April 27th, 2010
3:12 pm
Hello, LadyJ!
@Carlito ~ I sent it to you and Julia on purpose.
@Kym ~ send me your email. Is it lady_….. (I have the rest of this)?
Lady J-Baby put the work in like a champion......
April 27th, 2010
3:12 pm
kimmie in 06 why I had a Home Depot Card lol geesh…….I am being patient….I can’t do your # yet but when it truly hits me with prayer and a sound plan i am out like Forest Gump! LOL!!!!!!
I want a nice size deck andn open kitchen I love entertaining I want a very open floor plan with a master on the main….hell it can be a ranch on a basement…..I want a house! LOL *tear*
Carlito
April 27th, 2010
3:15 pm
One thing that amazed me down here is how cheap you could get property, the recession plus mortgage fraud made it a buyers market.
lurker
April 27th, 2010
3:15 pm
Yep, AmazonRed I do. As unoriginal as it is, I figure most days folks can identify with the writing style…after so long that is but I guess not.
Lady J-Baby put the work in like a champion......
April 27th, 2010
3:16 pm
I know carlito know who is going to co sign for a sistah!!!!1 LOL
Kym
April 27th, 2010
3:17 pm
@leggs that’s it..
LadyJ it will come..just have to wait for your house..ask my friends and family and real estate agent..I am such the control freak that thru the process—which I was not in control of– I wanted to scream..but I have to say I have the world best real estate agent..she kept me sane..ok what passes for sane.
Lady J-Baby put the work in like a champion......
April 27th, 2010
3:17 pm
so it is two diff female lurkers……It is one that is cool with me…..lol
Carlito
April 27th, 2010
3:17 pm
Lady J, per Swiss, you better get a white man. LOL
Lady J-Baby put the work in like a champion......
April 27th, 2010
3:18 pm
thanks Kym!!!!!!
Lady J-Baby put the work in like a champion......
April 27th, 2010
3:18 pm
carlito lmbao!!!!!!!!!
Melo
April 27th, 2010
3:19 pm
That’s why it was funny when you went off on Professor yesterday
@Ared?
i know right.
I saw that and said to myself, u know what?? some days,some pple sure do need a pseudo soliloqy coz it helps to get thangs off ur chest even tho u shooting wrong targets!
Elijah ( Today is a good day!)
April 27th, 2010
3:19 pm
BlackMagicWoman what happens when you go back BMW?
When you enter BlackMagicWoman Aladins’s arabian theme song comes on!
Lady lurker know make sure you choose something that matches your sweet personality!
kimmie-livin my golden life
April 27th, 2010
3:20 pm
Lady J – Mine is a ranch. When I bought it, my father had just had a stroke a few years prior and he had trouble going up & down stairs. I wanted a place where he could easily get around when he came to visit. Plus, being by myself, I did not want to have to worry about what’s going on in the basement!LOL
Mine is the perfect starter home – 3 bedroom, 2 full bath. I can do smaller entertaining, but for the bigger parties, I do it at SO’s.
I love my little house!
AmazonRed™
April 27th, 2010
3:20 pm
Yep, AmazonRed I do. As unoriginal as it is, I figure most days folks can identify with the writing style…after so long that is but I guess not.
I absolutely can not. The “lurker” name alone is synonymous with “random poster” or “troll” that I don’t even try to distinguish whether it’s a regular poster or not.
Professor...
April 27th, 2010
3:20 pm
lurker- I knew that wasn’t you yesterday.
Raqi
April 27th, 2010
3:20 pm
I figure most days folks can identify with the writing style
lurker, yeah I can tell when it’s you. When folks comment under “lurker” it’s quite easy to tell if it’s one of the regulars. It’s like changing your face but not your voice. Jennifer Grey.
I can sometimes sense when a “lurker” is purposely trying to sound (i.e. type style) like another regular as to make people think that is that other person.
But I’m a skeptic so don’t mind me. LOL
Raqi
April 27th, 2010
3:22 pm
lurker, what type of business are you in?
AmazonRed™
April 27th, 2010
3:22 pm
Lady J – I have a little patio off the kitchen, but no real deck. My SO has a nice deck though.
Same here. I was looking forward to this warm weather and sitting on his deck with a glass of wine. He leaves his dog out there when he’s at work tho, so it’s full of poop.
There goes my fantasy!
Leggs
April 27th, 2010
3:22 pm
FYI ~ if anyone wants to join in celebrating Tazzee Mae Jankins union and haven’t received an evite, just let me know…there’s never too much fun to spread around.
Carlito
April 27th, 2010
3:22 pm
What happened yesterday?
Carlito
April 27th, 2010
3:23 pm
Anyone want two cats before I have them killed?
Raqi
April 27th, 2010
3:24 pm
kimmie, houses come with their share of problems in upkeep but ain’t nothing like having your own place. You own yard. You can paint your walls whatever color you want. You can change the carpet, put down hardwood, put up wallpaper, change the sink and faucets, don’t have to fight over parking spaces….
Melo
April 27th, 2010
3:24 pm
what happened to blogger dude with the mercedes? the boa guy?..maybe lurker can changer her name to MERCEDES or baskeball since shes about to sleep with bball guy!
kimmie-livin my golden life
April 27th, 2010
3:25 pm
Lady J, just make it a part of your plan & it will happen! I was not even thinking about a house because I thought I couldn’t afford one. One of my best friends encouraged me to go for it. My older godsister put me in touch with a great real estate agent that had been in the business for 30 years. I told her what I wanted, where & how much I was willing to pay per month, nothing over even if I qualified. She had great financing connections and I got a great loan, no foolishness! One of the best experiences in my adult life was purchasing my home.
Lady J-Baby put the work in like a champion......
April 27th, 2010
3:25 pm
awwww kimmie my starter home will be that too! trust I was told by a wise person I will be starting low and working my way up…….
hey lurker!!!!
AmazonRed™
April 27th, 2010
3:25 pm
Anyone want two cats before I have them killed?
Give the cats a chance!
kimmie-livin my golden life
April 27th, 2010
3:27 pm
Raqi – God bless the child that’s got it’s own!
Lady J-Baby put the work in like a champion......
April 27th, 2010
3:27 pm
kimmie my view was I would buy it with my husband I truly believed that to here recently when I came to grips with I will buy my 1st home single……..the bit of traditional in me…i promise til here recently I wouldn’t think twice about buying a home……lol
now husband what daggit J wants a house lol
AmazonRed™
April 27th, 2010
3:27 pm
I guess you can call my home a starter home. Typical 3 bd, 2.5 baths. But for me, I wasn’t thinking I’d move up right away. My family of 5 grew up in a house much smaller than mine.
I had to get a house big enough where I could add a husband and even a kid without HAVING to move. My friends who bought the 2 bedroom townhomes are feeling the crunch now.
Professor...
April 27th, 2010
3:28 pm
@Kimmie/Lady J, same here I love my ranch as well. It is just perfect for me.
@Melo/lurker/Ared-that lurker post from yesterday had the author name written all over it…that is why I did not respond. Some mess is not even worth it…lol.
Lady J-Baby put the work in like a champion......
April 27th, 2010
3:29 pm
kimmie so true! thankful for support though but my day is coming! i just know I can be impulsive the leo in me but I am crawling! Got to develop a realistic plan and I always want a savings…between a car, house, and child single it is a bit overwhemling but I know folk do it daiyl without thought but for me it is scary…
Carlito
April 27th, 2010
3:30 pm
AmazonRed, if I give them a chance my dogs may not.
I am just joking. My dogs stay outside, if one of those spawns of satan cats go out back and something happens or if I leave the back door open and they make it out there, it is not on my conscious. LOL
lurker
April 27th, 2010
3:30 pm
Lady J – that’s me…your fav
Elijah – Any suggestions?
Professor – Don’t shoot me…that was me. I thought that was me you came after…a virtual cup of joe to make amends?
Raqi – One sec
Melo – That was seriously funny. Dude, I ain’t impressed that easily. That’s not trying act hard either. Just not. I bought a benz a couple of weeks back
Maybe “E-Class” for my moniker. Naaah, that’s too bragadocious (sp), might hit a tree for giving it too much “umph”
AmazonRed™
April 27th, 2010
3:31 pm
that lurker post from yesterday had the author name written all over it…that is why I did not respond. Some mess is not even worth it…lol.
Professor – Ah…I see now.
That chick is crazy!
lurker
April 27th, 2010
3:31 pm
Don’t shoot me Professor, I could have lied…right?
Leggs
April 27th, 2010
3:31 pm
People seem to talk to you differently after you’ve purchased a home. Maybe it’s the knuckleheads I use to know, but I noticed it immediately.
Also, don’t immediately let the “man” know (your job) that you bought a home when you do buy a home. Same with a new car. Don’t know why this is, but shyt happens!
Thanks to all of you you have responded and all who have viewed. I hope you viewers make up you mind soon!!
Raqi
April 27th, 2010
3:32 pm
kimmie, I rented my house from a friend of my father’s. The couple left the country to go traveling for a of couple years and wanted someone to live in the house while they were gone. I was at the time looking to buy a condo. The couple decided they were not coming back. They called my father and asked him to ask me if I was interested in buying. This house was a bit more (size) than what I would have attempted to buy but being a friend of my father and having nothing to lose they gave me a very good deal. They owed nothing on the house so everything they got for it was profit.
I was a little skeptical at first but it all worked out.
Sometimes it is all in who you know.