Good Monday Morning!

Glad you’re having fun in my city WD and I’m with you on that one cuz I’m not much of a rules kind of guy either…hmm its always tricky for me as a guy, because usually if women are interested they’ll waste no time giving up the digits & if they aren’t then they’ll take his number and usually never call lol. but for guy to insist for you to call him, is IMHO a bit odd (read: interesting) considering you were giving guy reciprocation so my only guess is he felt confident enough that you’d call him back to give you his number.

Me personally, it makes no difference cuz if we chat it up and I’m feelin you I’ll ask for your number, if i get it cool if i don’t cool. If you ask for mine, then I gladly give it, but I don’t expect a return because from my experiences if a woman is truly interested in you then she will have no problem dialing the digits into ur iPhone, crackberry, droid, or what may have you. no hesitation lol

I can imagine some women being offended bc some women still want the man to do the pursuing and chasing or some just might think it outright cocky that a guy is supposed to assume that you even want to call him or are available. Then again, there are some women who find it intriguing, take charge, and can just go with the flow…sometimes guys are so used to taking the reins they wanna see how women can handle lead i guess. [diff strokes, diff folks]

random question: does anybody write down their digits on a piece of paper anymore? …naw guess that would make getting caught too easy nowadays lol

• Link
• Report this comment

does anybody write down their digits on a piece of paper anymore?

@Great Guy, you know what I would not mind it one bit to receive a number on a piece of paper. I have a habit of not locking numbers in my phone. It seems so odd to me to lock in a number and you really don’t know the person. This goes for personal, professional etc. I just have a thing about locking numbers in my phone. Yes I am weird and quirky like that.

• Link
• Report this comment

Wise, it sounded like he was very interested and put the ball in your court to put you in control and/or at ease. Based on the tenor of your encounter, you’re both interested so does it really matter who kicks it off first? Because he put the onus on you to be the first one to initiate contact, are you feeling like you’re not really being pursued? Where’s the complication?

Guys, what do you prefer with number swap and first contact? When you are interested, does it matter who does the calling and when?

I prefer to swap numbers and initiate the call but it doesn’t matter to me who calls first.

Are women offended when you ask them to call you instead of vice versa?

In those cases, the woman has taken my number and prefers to initiate the first contact which is cool with me.
Have fun at the Jazz Fest, I could eat a shrimp po-boy and finish it off with a Barq’s root beer about now.

• Link
• Report this comment

Hey Professor!!!!!!

• Link
• Report this comment

I hate to change the subject but I have run across this issue a couple of times in the last few months. I met two guys recently, and both reluctantly informed me they were seeing some one. Now, this revelation came after a few phone calls between us and after much prodding by me of why we have to date during the week instead of on prime time Friday or Saturday night. They both thought that I should give us a chance, and perhaps I will win out over their current girlfriends. I said thanks, but no thanks. My question is: Are there women out there that will date a men who are currently in a relationship? Now, one of the guys informed me that guys will date women that are in relationships because guys are confident that they can win us over. Whatever, dude? My opinion is that if a guy will move on from his current girlfriend, it is only a matter of time before he moves on from me. It would be different if the current girlfriend and he were having problems (on and off again relationship). But one of the guys goes on to explain how he has a key to her place, she’s out of town alot, etc. Sorry, this is not a ‘booty’ call.

• Link
• Report this comment

He ended up escorting me all the way to my gate (gentleman?) and then he asked me to take his number down. He took mine and minutes later, he sends a text giving me his phone number.

I actually don’t mind calling but I found it strange that he was so adamant about me calling him.

Ugh. What is that all about really? This is one of my biggest pet peeves in dating and I would have quickly lost his number.

Men talk about women not knowing their place and how they want to get back to traditional values…well, back then the men made the effort.

I don’t care if I’d potentially “miss out” on on a good man. There are plenty of good men out there with actual follow thru!

• Link
• Report this comment

Hi WD all. Interesting issue because I do the same as the guy i your commentary. This is my reason for asking the lady to call me. I want her to feel comfortable and safe. To do this, I will include my number when I am corresponding with a ladd from Match or eHarmony and tell her that “when she feels comfortable, here is my number”. Sometimes the lady might respond with, “I am old fashioed and would rather the man call me” and then sends me her number…okay that is fine. In the end, I want it to be the woman’s choice, but I am quite capable of making a first move if that is what she wants.

By the way, for any who might not have already guessed this…Paris is INCREDIBLE.

• Link
• Report this comment

@Randyt – hey no pain no gain sir lol im tryna wait for paris after i visit hawaii

• Link
• Report this comment

And unlike WiseDiva, I do mind calling first and will tell the dude, who insists I give him a call, straight up, that I’m won’t be making the first call.

I’ll spare you all the details on how the Mister pursued me, but I will tell you that the opportunity was missed the first time, so when he ran into me again, he let me know that he wouldn’t miss his chance this time!

• Link
• Report this comment

It’s a matter of context,

If you weren’t feeling taking his number, a simple “I don’t do that” to average dude is cue to proceed in taking yours.

Also, if a woman “looks” busy, or focused (as Kimmie likes to say), then why not give her my number? When you have the free time call.

To the general point of the exchange of numbers, I’m with Coolshadow – does it really matter who calls who? Is stating an interest in him seeing you or vice versa really that important? Is this not a case of making a mountain out of a molehill?

@ARed

Thing is, not every dude is on that “know your role” stuff. If that’s the kinda cat you’re after and that you want to be after you, then cool. But not every dude has that “traditional” view of dating.

Good morning to all

• Link
• Report this comment

@ARed – see that’s what I’m used to and honestly I don’t mind…that’s how I was raised is to pursue a woman and yea it’s clear views and opinions of that have changed, but do you think it makes a woman look bad to call a guy or take a guys number?

@Prof – good thing you run cuz with that prison build and no cardio he won’t be able to catch up lol

• Link
• Report this comment

lmbao

• Link
• Report this comment

@4 Gs. I went to Maui many years ago. Still probably the prettiest scenery anywhere is the Hana Road (took a rental car past the “no rental cars beyond here” sign and went around the back side of the volcano (maximum safe speed, 5 mph…those rental cars will go anywhere). .

I am trying (as perhaps you are) to scratch off items on my “bucket list”. I still have Italy, Germany, and Switzerland, Egypt and Boston on my A-list. I love Barcelona, Paris, and London. Have been to Hawaii and most American cities and states, but not Alaska. Going to high school in rural East Tennessee, where most people never escaped other than the Army, I’ve travelled quite a bit. Came a long way from Hawkins County Tennessee

• Link
• Report this comment

@Randyt – lol daredevil you are sir

I’m out to the flightline. Be Blessed everyone

• Link
• Report this comment

*sigh* Dating gets complicated for no good reason sometimes.
What’s complicated. If you like someone, call them. If you’re not interested, on to the next.

So, what’s the difference between this guy asking you to write his number down and giving you his business card. I’m adaptable. I prefer to be the one calling, but I have run into women who have felt more safe/comfortable just taking my number. No problem. Whatever puts you at ease and makes you feel most comfortable. I can go with the flow.

• Link
• Report this comment

Prof, Just going around saying “je t’aime” to everyone you see. I saw so many unbelievably beautiful woman, incredible amounts of PDA, etc. I do not think I saw a single native French man or woman who was overweight. I was so jealous…definitely go there with someone you love if you can…it permeates the air.

I wanted to just walk up say “je t’aime” and kiss about a 1000 women (just the 10s or better), (or maybe grab a booty, hey, I’m human). I think you can get away with that.in Paris.

• Link
• Report this comment

Not to change the discussio, but

Can we dispense with the bromide, trope, or overuse of the phrase about “men and [our] options”?

Yes, while there may be a statistical advantage for men in certain cities, regardless of the numbers, you ladies have us beat.

When a man gets ready to settle down, it’s never about the number of women he’ll be passing up, it’s about the woman he won’t let go of. That said, yes there are options. But that complaint only holds weight for a woman that has not decided to be the only option.

In that, I’ll give somma the ladies on here their just due.

• Link
• Report this comment

I prefer to swap digits also..

And Professor.. Heres a fix for locking numbers in your phone.. I just put New in the last name space / where I met them..

EX: First name: Professor
Last Name: New Publix

Thats right Im sure I could see you in Publix.. But anywho.. Then every so often I run thru the New list and start deleting.. And if I we get to really “Conversating” then I’ll put your last name on File.. Im gonna need a last name cause you know you might try and get me and people need to know who you are.. Just in case

• Link
• Report this comment

really……hmmmmm

• Link
• Report this comment

@ abc

The “TSA chicks”…now that is scary. Ugly women with weapons, a bad attitude, and a scowl on their faces that would make a mad pitbull look good. That is the epitome of “hard up”.

• Link
• Report this comment

@ARed…nice story thanks for sharing!

Thanks Professor.

• Link
• Report this comment

@Runlife,

You know a lot of women and men will share a mate. I have seen more women than men involved in this kind of behavior. Shoot, I have seen it since middle school….women waiting on the sidelines hoping to one day be “IT.” Not to mention the ones that sit on standby for years…smh and they a quick to say how long they have been with dude and how they cannot leave.

Also I am glad you saw the red flags dating only during the week, and at least those dudes finally came clean. You know they could have blamed it on work and made it seem like they were doctors, firefighters or federal agents etc.

• Link
• Report this comment

I met two guys recently, and both reluctantly informed me they were seeing some one.

“Seeing someone” doesn’t mean they have a girlfriend. It means they are seeing someone. It means that ole girl is the “main” and you basically can date the guy and compete for the “main” or “girlfriend” spot or you can reject the deal and keep looking.

Would I date someone who is seeing somone else? Sure. Cuz it means that I’m probably seeing someone else too.

• Link
• Report this comment

Morning.

“Guys, what do you prefer with number swap and first contact? When you are interested, does it matter who does the calling and when? Are women offended when you ask them to call you instead of vice versa?

Should I let the guy lead the contact and interest or do I put in effort and wait for reciprocation? What works best for you?

The way I handle the phone number situation is to give her my number and tell her when to call me. This is the ideal situation at first.

This works out good for guys in 2 ways:

1. If she is interested, she will call and you will know she is interested because she called you.

2. If she is not interested and does not call, you will at least have her out of your hair and focus on prospects that could lead somewhere rather than you calling her and letting her toy around with you. At least you still have your dignity.

I have had women say oh I dont call guys, etc. Thats their preference. I gave my number to a woman last week and said call me tomorrow around noon. She called the next day at 12:06pm

“Should I let the guy lead the contact and interest or do I put in effort and wait for reciprocation”

I think you should have balanced reciprocation. Nobody is that busy where one person should have to do all the calling. If they are interested, they will call. Simple and plain.

• Link
• Report this comment

WISE – Have fun in the N.O. <—– One of the best citys in the states! Also, I need you to get a daiquiri with a shot of "your choice" and walk around with it…. I just love they can do that

Topic – InfamousDK had it right…. If you're interested, you'll call. That's why he gave you his number! Simple as that. Not sure what's hard about that one

Frankly, I've ALWAYS preferred it that way because I HATED giving my number out. Never was comfy with that one.

ACTUALLY, it's how me and minzes got together He slipped me his number, and simply said, "Call me if you're interested."

Hey, I still call him Ksmooth

• Link
• Report this comment

Not to mention the ones that sit on standby for years<——————–Professor the chic standing will be singing the song by Vesta CONGRAGULATIONS LMBAO—-Real Talk! HA!

• Link
• Report this comment

“The way I handle the phone number situation is to give her my number and tell her when to call me.”

If some dude I just met gave me an appointment time for a phone call, I’d probably assume that he could only talk on the phone after his wife left for work.

• Link
• Report this comment

Oh and Ovie told me to tell you.. Back then they didnt know me, now Im hot they all on me.. Ha Ha!!

Still don’t know em. Don’t care either.

• Link
• Report this comment

Why is the blog eating my post so early, I haven’t even began cursing as yet

WISE – You gotta walk around with a daiquiri for me. I love they can do that there!

InfamousDK – I agree, If she’s interested she’ll call. Period. I’ve NEVER felt comfortable giving my number out. I don’t see the angst against taking his number…

ACTUALLY – That’s how I met minzes… He slipped me his number and said in my ear, “Call me if you’re interested.” That was the first for me, and I like…

Hey – I still call him KSMOOTH

I met my

• Link
• Report this comment

@Amazon

Thats cool then. I will give her a call but definately would wait a couple of days. Cant look thirsty lol.

@Run4life

I saw your msg about guys trying to win over women who are already in a relationship…Thats a wrong move. You never romance the next man’s woman. That’s what the bf is there for. Its not my job to try to take her out, impress her and do stuff that the bf is doing.

Alot of times, women in relationships try to act single because they have been with a guy for a while and its getting stale, he is “couch dating” her now and not taking her out or doing anything different with her…Thats why some women like to say they like to be spoiled. Translation, I already have a guy doing everything else, but not really taking me out etc like he used to, so thats what you will be doing. Wake up guys!

• Link
• Report this comment

Good morning folks!

Happy birthday Neesha!

• Link
• Report this comment

“would wait a couple of days. Cant look thirsty lol.”

Silly Rabbit, Trix are for kids – so are games like that.

Mdot – we all grown. If you’re interested in and excited about meeting a lady, nothing wrong with letting her know. In the few days that you’ve been “not looking thirsty”, someone else could have stepped up their pursuit and you may miss out on an opportunity.

• Link
• Report this comment

He was pretty hot, so you know he is used to women chasing him *eyeroll* , but I’m used to men pursuing ME too. Will there be a battle of the egos?

Wise – I prefer, battle of the principles. But since you stated that you don’t usually mind calling, I guess it is egos. lol

• Link
• Report this comment

LAdy J – Where Westend Winn Dixie..

• Link
• Report this comment

Wednesday Wind Down NUT!!!!!! LMBAO I haven’t been to Winn Dixie since SC!!!!!!! Who knew it was a Food Lion on the back roads going to Fayetteville lol

• Link
• Report this comment

@SCool

I was saying thirsty in the standpoint of looking desperate. You dont want to look desperate. Its a turn off.

@DreamsMaterialize

LOL I am speaking from a standpoint of letting her choose you. Women get guys approaching them 24/7/365. If she is interested she will call you. Think how you look blowing up a woman’s phone who you just met and dont know from a can a paint? You look desperate!

• Link
• Report this comment

Morning All,

This is where dating is made to soooo complicated when it doesn’t have to be. The fact that he was on your mind for even a few minutes after meeting him says there is some potential there. Go ahead & call him!!! What’s the worse than can happen???? Rules..smules…let go and do you!!

• Link
• Report this comment

I don’t want to be chased, but I do want to be courted.

• Link
• Report this comment

Ared – No, I don’t understand a grown ass woman in this day and age feeling uncomfortable calling a guy. Don’t really get that one….

Mdot – Yeah I’m not feeling the appointment times. You’d get the GTFOH face for that one… or just the one raised eyebrow for that one

WISE – Get a shot of Everclear, ain’t shyt girlie about that

SCool – Trix are definitely for Mdot, er I mean KIDS – If I’m intrested, I’ll call! No standard on the time lapse time frame I ain’t 17yrs old.

• Link
• Report this comment

I knew someone would ask that question.

You only have to chase something that is running from you. I am not running.

However, I do expect and appreciate a certain level of effort from you to let me know that you are interested past a passing fancy or something that’s purely physical.

• Link
• Report this comment

WISE – In the end, what JtJ said – What’s the worse that could happen

MDot -Think how you look blowing up a woman’s phone who you just met and dont know from a can a paint? You look desperate! <—————-Not desperate, but unstable.

• Link
• Report this comment

Lady J,

You are right compatibility is the key!

What’s for lunch…this morning I just sampled food I am not going to call it breakfast, and now I am hungry. I have an uncrustable PB&J sandwich (those of you with kids or big kids themselves know what I’m talking about) that I want to eat, but it is still early.

• Link
• Report this comment

However, I do expect and appreciate a certain level of effort from you to let me know that you are interested past a passing fancy or something that’s purely physical.<————Amen!

With that someone tweeted this "If a person like you, They’ll ALWAYS, if they don't GIVE UP……..(and I am not referring to I am busy stuff bc we all are busy, but after the #s have been exchanged communication from both parties should take place if the interest sustains…..I think…..

• Link
• Report this comment

Professor I am trying to plot of a way with not attending a 2:30 meeting…….geesh…..lunch is left over chicken and mash potatoes…….sigh! LOL

• Link
• Report this comment

On topic!

chics calling first is usually an age thing and thirsty move too!

chics under 30 dont call guys first,for the most part.They have the world and men eating from their hands,so to speak.So the guys do the chasing for the most part.

Females over 30?? more of the calling and chasing,so to speak coz the trimmings are getting thinner and thinner. They call it a mature move coz they are mature women! Thats a euphamism really coz there is thirst in there somewhere as well altho others are really now more in tune with their sexuality and needs! So they will call and express themselves more coz they understand the itchiness of cobwebness!

So go ‘head WD,do ur thang coz at 37,u snooze on the fine guy,u loose and the cobwebs are on u!

Good morning!

• Link
• Report this comment

How would you feel if you just met a guy gave him your number then an hour later, he calling you and blowing up your phone like Laverne and Shirley?

M. That happened to me once and it was very awkard and scary.

• Link
• Report this comment

Im gonna call when I can.. It depends on the convo.. If we were having an excellent convo then I might call you as soon as I left you to finish up or I might call you the next day.. Whatever works for you do.. Flip flop and I talked 30 mins after meeting and guess what.. She called me.. I didnt think she was thirsty or anything.. We wouldve kept talking where we were but we had to go.. So we picked up where we left off from when we were talking..

• Link
• Report this comment

She called me.. I didnt think she was thirsty or anything..

@DK??

Why u think she aint thirsty?? Remember,the fact that u like her dont have anythihng to do with her thirst.

Besides,what woman will agree to the fact that they’re thirsty??

• Link
• Report this comment

@Professor…

You see what I mean!

@Scool

I feel you but also I am saying let the excitement build up, dont just call an hour later like hey what you doing? The same thing I was doing an hour ago!

• Link
• Report this comment

Beaut – Whats the dang gone deal Babe!!

• Link
• Report this comment

AMEN

• Link
• Report this comment

And that was SHE not he on the 11:26 post..

• Link
• Report this comment

yep DK . . . follow your heart! dats how i’m livin’.

• Link
• Report this comment

Behaviors that freak me out when I first meet a dude:

1. He appears a decade behind, unlike no child left behind this is different and a creepier version. If dude is behind on technology, keeps talking about something is located next to The Purple Onion I know he was down yonder for bit and don’t want to tell me.

2. He calls me and calls me and did I say call me like he is crazy demanding time and attention. I feel like he is either (a) Ted Bundy’s cousin, uncle, sister’s brother nephew or (b) just crazy for no reason and having him in my life will be drama.

3. Ahhhhh the one that rushes into a relationship and talks about marriage in the first five minutes on the conversation he states, “Hey no games or gimmicks here I am looking for my wife.” Next dude proceeds with the personal stuff “are you a virgin…when was the last time you had sex…how much do you make…do you sleep naked…where do you stay…do you cook?

4. Now this is my favorite the one that feels like he knows you after five minutes and proceeds to give advice and stuff. Also this type of dude gives out a controlling vibe as well…he talks about what his woman will and will not do. How he is the man, beating his chest and stuff.

5. The “rich guy” that lives with his momma and pretends it is his house, but he is helping his mama out. Guess what it is really a first encounter, so I really don’t care until the climax build after two conversations and he mentions…I can move over there with you and help you out. He is not aware where “over there” is because I gave out a fake address and/or told him I stay at my rental property.

• Link
• Report this comment

@DK!!

see,my interpretation of ur 11.26 is that when u vibing and feeling each other,nothing can come ‘tween u two luvbirds!

It takes somebody removed to untangle and understand whats making that glue stick!

Thirst is not really a negative,coz it takes thirst to accept somebody within ur space.Either there is games manship in the expression of desire(non acknowledgement of existing thirst) or there is no games manship!

• Link
• Report this comment

chica all is well do I seem not to be??? LOL

• Link
• Report this comment

Melo – it wasnt even about luvbirds.. I just enjoyed talking to the chick.. So I kept talking to her and she kept talking to me.. See it has to be a two way street.. Im only gonna call you two times if I get the Im gonna call you back. Im gonna let you call me back.. Its simple..

• Link
• Report this comment

WISE…enjoy NOLA. Might I suggest a very large Hurricane from Fat Tuesdays and karaoke on Bourbon St. If you are a party starter such as my crew and I…you will get free drinks from there on! That is how we got it started for Mardi Gras.

On topic…I am all for the exchange if I am interested. This new guys I met….he took my number and then dialed me and I saved it. They next day I received a text. But I would have text him first. I don’t think that whole bait and wait game is necessary. From what I have been told some guys like it if you take the initiative because that spares their ego if you are not interested. But I could be wrong.

• Link
• Report this comment

oh my sexycool lolololol too funny!

• Link
• Report this comment

Carlito is getting married tonite in Vegas uall.

• Link
• Report this comment

I guess Julia must have been reading on Friday after all.

• Link
• Report this comment

Yep he is getting married on his horse

• Link
• Report this comment

awwwwww congrats to them!!!!!!!!!

• Link
• Report this comment

@Prof
letting your intentions be known up front . . . ummm yea! don’t you want to know what you gettin’ into? why would that scare you off? that way you wouldn’t waste his time going on a 2nd date. jus sayin’

• Link
• Report this comment

Hey Beautiful!

I see it like this (hence the reason I said the copy/paste) it is one thing to say your intentions, but it is another thing to follow up with the rest of the crap I listed. If someone is true, why all the other crazy questions?

• Link
• Report this comment

HA!

• Link
• Report this comment

@Prof
you numbered yo sh*t! and i picked the one i didn’t like. or didn’t agree wit.

• Link
• Report this comment

Prof – what do you mean? Im letting my intentions be known and it would be less than appropriate to let them go unrequited.. I am telling you that this is what it is and this is what you need so get with this Pimping.. Anna Mae is Said I like ya now dont make me angry cause you wouldnt like me when Im angry..

• Link
• Report this comment

So, how DOES a male convey that he isn’t taking you out becauae he wants a friend to spend money on? Honest question really.

Randyt IMO and I will not speak for all women just me. If a man is interested he should say I am interested in getting to know you better. Getting to know me is important. When a man convey all of that sexual talk he appears he is out for a smash and grab so he can get moving. If he is really looking to possibly build a relationship he should just say something like, “so far I really like you and would like to continue seeing you.” Also the little things count…small gifts or dates centered around my interest shows he is listening. To me there is nothing like a nice hug and a soft kiss on the cheek of lips to show as well All of that freaky talk the first few minutes, hours or days is a turnoff. Oh yea it reminds me of this dude that played like he was injured and told me he would feel a lot better if he got some good sex in we had only known each other briefly. IMO that was just lame.

• Link
• Report this comment

Well, I can’t say I’m always a cheerleader but imma have to say it today….that 11:26 and 11:31 combined is the formula. Now, if we would get that bottled and pantented I believe that approach would drill down signanficantly on the BS and at least attain a 70% success rate.

• Link
• Report this comment

Prof – Sarcasm.. That was my attempt at it.. Maybe it wasnt that good..

• Link
• Report this comment

Lurker Agree!

• Link
• Report this comment

hmmmmm so that is what it is……lol…….geesh! Keep it coming Professor!

• Link
• Report this comment

Prof – yeah for creepy dudes out there that tell you they love you within a week is a bad look.. I thought fer sure you wouldve got it when I said Ana Mae… Get in the Car Ana Mae..

• Link
• Report this comment

Sessy – did you ask him why he let Nene beat him up?

• Link
• Report this comment

with someone bring up s-e-x in the first two minutes like he is in the middle of a wet dream.

@Proff!!

smetimes,some men will throw that out just to test the recepient. U know,there are diff types of women.

Some will giggle at it,and the meaning is,to me: ok to proceed with a lil caution….yet others will cut u off quick….. so men will calibrate their convo based on the vibe they get.

A lot of times a relationship with a woman is defined by how u got her.If i hit her on the first or 2nd date,then sex is gon be the number#1 thang defining that relationship coz it didnt take much to get it.If she starts trying to put roadblocks after that hit,then i may evaluate if i wanna continue that relationship or not but the thang is,she showed me her cards so it seems,there aint much more for me to see..there was no mystery there.

IF a woman is pursuing me more than im pursuing her,u know how thats gon go down!

• Link
• Report this comment

I’m looking at the picture gallery on Dollywood and I have to say that the single greatest tragedy to happen to American people this century has got to be the rising popularity of plastic surgery.

• Link
• Report this comment

Leroy – They have an interesting post about the show over at the VerySmartBrothas blog today.

• Link
• Report this comment

Professor – THANKS! I’m glad you said it cause I don’t have the energy (nor the inclination actually). It’s not in my nature to try to teach grown ass women about The Game…

• Link
• Report this comment

@SexyC ~ I see you’re not far from Cloud 10! Good for you!

• Link
• Report this comment

Googling what Ocho Cinco has to say… I just love his body, oh I mean his charming, intellectual blah blah blah…..

• Link
• Report this comment

Howdy everybody….how they hanging?

• Link
• Report this comment

((((((((((((HUGS TO YOU CHICA))))))))))))!!!!!!!!!!!

• Link
• Report this comment

it’s funny how the fellas told you like it is and you completely ignored what was posted. smh. you need to pay attention! am i the only one gettin’ it?

• Link
• Report this comment

CONGRATS CARLITO & JULIA!!!! Many blessings and good luck to you!

SCool….so Dwight doesn’t look as coffin ready in person? I swear he looks embalmed on the show and in pictures.

• Link
• Report this comment

That Kelly chick is naturally sexy when she aint even trying..

• Link
• Report this comment

Sessy – thats the kinda sexy I be talking about.. That natural Im just standing here but Im talking to you sexy..

• Link
• Report this comment

going to breakfast with sweetie and bff! will ck in laaaterrr!!!

• Link
• Report this comment

Professor Did you ring for me? Chick, what the heck are you moaning about? IT’S A BLOG MEATHEAD. Chick you got some real issues. I was here waaaay before you ever docked “our” steps, so sorry love xxxx, you’re wrong again. I’ve been “lurker” since the beginning. Is it not idiotic to think I’m “hiding” behind lurker when I can effectively do the same thing behind names such as “professor” by the way, why the moniker…post your real name….or sharon, or cathy, or lucious butt, or hotbabe, or sexyone, or keelolo….GET MY POINT?! What a simpleton you are. DING DING DING DING…everyone is anonymous…be it lurker or luscious….get it? I know, short yellow bus, some days for you. Some of you people need to get off this blog and take a breather some days…seriously. IIIIIIIITTTTTTT”””SSSSSS AAAAAAA BBBBBLLLLLOOOOGG

• Link
• Report this comment

WHAT A WEINER? omgOSH

• Link
• Report this comment

@Raaaaaaaandy

It’s really quite simple, if’n it’s not going the way you want it to (you= relationship, her= dating to ‘date’), KIM playboy.

• Link
• Report this comment

Professor – I fell you indeed! I usually don’t myself, so I understand why you’d digress….

Angie – No, nothings wrong. It’s just a thirsty bait thrown out there for those, such as yourself, to bite. But as I said, not into teaching sooo….. ——–>

• Link
• Report this comment

leggs he is a character!!!! LOL one of my favorite sports figures….lol

• Link
• Report this comment

Leggs – Yes! I love that! Gave them the middle fanga

• Link
• Report this comment

How would you feel if you just met a guy gave him your number then an hour later, he calling you and blowing up your phone like Laverne and Shirley?

M Dot – No girl would feel good about that. That’s happened to me and the guy got saved in my phone as “Crazy Dude.”

But for a guy to take a number, and call her that night or the next day, shows he’s genuine, not a stalker.

• Link
• Report this comment

Ared – No, I don’t understand a grown ass woman in this day and age feeling uncomfortable calling a guy. Don’t really get that one….

mqew – One could argue a grown azz woman should also be comfortable in giving her number out in this day and age as well. *kanye shrug*

• Link
• Report this comment

Lakers – No.
Mayweather.

• Link
• Report this comment

dont just call an hour later like hey what you doing? The same thing I was doing an hour ago!

• Link
• Report this comment

@Ared/ladies

Suppose y’all meet out on the town and it’s late, dude’s got the number, and calls to make sure you got home okay?

What’s the (honest) reaction then?

• Link
• Report this comment

Dan – I have no problem wiht that. Although – he shouldn’t expect a long conversation to follow.

• Link
• Report this comment

Just a text

Thank you ma’am

• Link
• Report this comment

Who calls whom first? Really?

• Link
• Report this comment

Ared – Not the same. I’m NOT taking your number ie I’m not calling a guy first vs. I don’t like giving out my number ie not comfortable. But whatever luv…..

Dan – That’s cool. Shouldn’t be a problem as long as he’s not crazy, calling from outside my window trying to peek through

• Link
• Report this comment

tho usually I get a text (less points for the text)
when you met you current, and he sent you a text first before the call, did he initially lose some points? Do you all joke about that now?

• Link
• Report this comment

@mqew

“Did you make it hm ok?” is much different than:

“when r u going 2 bed?” or “which 1 is ur rm?”

• Link
• Report this comment

Ared – Not the same. I’m NOT taking your number ie I’m not calling a guy first vs. I don’t like giving out my number ie not comfortable. But whatever luv…..

mquw – They both speak to comfort. Either way it’s just stepping out of your comfort zone. You’re not willing to do it on one end, I’m not willing to do it on another.

• Link
• Report this comment

when you met you current, and he sent you a text first before the call, did he initially lose some points? Do you all joke about that now?

Dan – He knows nothing about the points system. It wasn’t anything worth mentioning. The thought about my safety counted more than the method. Had he kept texting (without calling) he would have eventually gotten ignored tho.

• Link
• Report this comment

Nothing us wrong with dating during the week; it can be sorta short, fun and sweet. However, if the week day does not work (both people have a hectic schedule that week), why are you skipping over Friday and Saturday nights to go out on Sunday.

As my minister friend says “I smell a rat”.

• Link
• Report this comment

@For Real

Then why the concern over not who calls first, but what “him giving me his number” means?

What other conclusion can be drawn? Better yet, what was yours.

• Link
• Report this comment

What I miss….

When was it said that a date should be on the weekend?

• Link
• Report this comment

For Real – you been cutting pieces of hair out of my wig and gluing it to your sideburn areas again? You know that was a top of the line faker than fake $7 wig. Money don’t grow on trees

• Link
• Report this comment

Dan – He knows nothing about the points system.
ARed you confusing me with Dan now? I’m saying…

• Link
• Report this comment

I meant “nothing is wrong”.

• Link
• Report this comment

Dan: “What other conclusion can be drawn? Better yet, what was yours.” – Wise can make boiling water complicated. The whole thing seems childish to me and that’s coming from a dude that still thinks farts are funny.

Melo: I’m upfront with them… I tell them from jump street I don’t want to be married but in their mind they hear “I’m hurt and I just need a GOOD woman like you that I can fall in love with and marry” So, they give me their number. Now, I know what I said to ole girl abaout marriage so I cannot be held responsible for what she conjours up in her head.

• Link
• Report this comment

For Real is lying his wig.

Dude, you know you can’t press down baby hair on a lacefront.

• Link
• Report this comment

Now, I know what I said to ole girl abaout marriage so I cannot be held responsible for what she conjours up in her head.

@Rell that is my thing, it bothers sometimes when people hear what they want to hear and make up the rest…smh. I remember Leggs talking about this as it relates to ol’ girl and the coach.

• Link
• Report this comment

@For Real??

I tell them from jump street I don’t want to be married

and ur smash rotation dont dry up regardless of ur upfrontness??

do any of the ladies stutter and push back??

• Link
• Report this comment

@Melo, I don’t stutter and push back, but I will drive on. When I have an open conversation of likes/dislikes, wants/needs, expectations/demands and I know in my heart that it does not jive with me I keep going.

• Link
• Report this comment

Talking about sex is not a good first date topic. It seems to me that if the chemistry is there, then talking about it is the world’s fastest way to chill the moment. Let it happen, don’t “ask” for it. Good grief. IMHO

• Link
• Report this comment

“Well you didn’t get all funky about me cutting hair off the Golden CT I wouldn’t have to touch your wigs”

Well, I only got funky about my pub hair because if I let you get a hold of that, what do you think we’d get the hair to fill in your bald spots on your head? You know we tried that spray stuff but it didn’t last because you have overactive sweat glands & the black ink tends to run

• Link
• Report this comment

huh??? lol

• Link
• Report this comment

Leggs – You lost me at apartment.

• Link
• Report this comment

Leggs, Leggs, Leggs, Leggs

#1. I am not Molly Maid, in fact I call her sometimes to clean my own place. So if cleaning was a hobby or interest of mine I would turn that thing into a business.

#2. Dude is not riding around in my car while I am at work. Man, this ultra lame dude asked if he could use my extra car one time. I had to pause and look at the phone. Why would I let a grown man use my car? Shoot, he should call Budget if it is a quick need, and Nalley if it is long term.

@Randyt I agree sex is not a good topic on a first date.

• Link
• Report this comment

lmbao!!!!

• Link
• Report this comment

….how long would you blogettes date someone before offering to clean up his apartment and give him your car for the day while you’re at work

Maybe…maybe after he’s proposed….maybe.

• Link
• Report this comment

Melo: “and ur smash rotation dont dry up regardless of ur upfrontness??” – Nope but that’s because women have really big egos and piss poor listening skills. Combine those two thing along with my baby hair For Real got chicks for days.

“do any of the ladies stutter and push back??” – Yep, it’s usually around New Years. That’s when I get the ultimatum and I tell them to refer back to our first conversation for their answer.

• Link
• Report this comment

Combine those two thing along with my baby hair For Real got chicks for days.

*hollers!!!!!!*

• Link
• Report this comment

@Run

I direct you to: http://www.verysmartbrothas.com/10-things-women-obsess-over-that-guys…

• Link
• Report this comment

Okay blog ladies I have said this once before and I will say it again.

MEN LIKE SEX
MEN WANT YOUR SEX
AND SOME FOOD
AND SOME QUIET
AND SOME BEER

• Link
• Report this comment

@CoolShadow

LOL please add the wallet dater to the list! You are correct and they are the worst. Their whole vibe switches up when they find out you can sponsor somethng.

Advice, if she ever invites her friend, you leave both of them sitting right there or if you pick her up and this chick tries to jump in the car, stop the date right there. She is trying to bring her own C-Blocker in for you. DONT FALL FOR IT!

• Link
• Report this comment

@ Leggs

Okay I will admit, I washed the Misters dishes. He was washing them, but I wasn’t gonna sit around like Princess Amazon (that day) so when he took a break, I finished em up.

Now, I get over there yesterday, and there are twice as many as the last time. I offered to wash them (praying he’d say no ). When he said no, I sat around like Princess Amazon while he cooked. It was just a mountain of dishes and I just couldn’t.

• Link
• Report this comment

@Professor

LOL regarding your post, its not that I stuck around long enough but sometimes when we meet a woman, she may be dealing with someone else and thats when I may be getting a lukewarm vibe.

Now if they break up or something happens, then she will switch her vibe up and go strong for me. The thing is its not genuine and it looks like she is doing to much.

I have others I need to add to the list to..

Like CoolShadow said, the girl who only wants to sponsor but I will take it further…

The coattail chick….she always knows you have something cool or fun going on and she only comes calling around the weekend time or if an event is in town….Whats going on, where yall, going, oh I may stop through there…then they try to turn this to a sponsorship situation….

The favor girl…

How you doing, hows work, etc…cool…I need a favor…I need you to move my couch, tv, or insert heavy item that her bf told her to move here _____lol

• Link
• Report this comment

@Melo ~ I have to agree with your answer. The girl is smiling all the time with that wistful look in her eyes counting down the next time she will see her man. Nothing wrong, she’s grown, was just surprised when she told me about his room and the kitchen and that it took 2 hrs to clean just the kitchen…one word = NASTY!

• Link
• Report this comment

For Real: well it shouldn’t be so good …wait, that wasn’t a dig, that was a compliment?!!!

• Link
• Report this comment

@Professor

The common justification behind “do for me, do for my people [sister, bff, chicks that came to the bar with me, etc.]” is that buying for all is (somehow) buying for the one. I.E. “Why yeen buy my friends no drinks?”

The common reason it’s even mentioned is weak sauce pimpin. Some dude somewhere bought a table full of women drinks, just to talk to the one, and; now that’s ‘what’s hot in the streets’.

You homeboy was right in paying his portion of the tab. More than 2 people, more than one method of payment on the bill.

• Link
• Report this comment

I believe she’s 37 and he’s 34. Nothing wrong with help cleaning your man’s apartment, but when 3 other men live there, I’m not trying to be the sorority hall mom! I’m not sure what he does for her besides keeping her happy (lol), so for right now, she’s in 7th heaven. She’s a giver and they seem to have met on common ground because she wants to give freely and openly. They go out often (abt 3x a week), but she’s yet to tell me what he brings to the table besides some fabulous loving. So, guess that’s enough for her.

• Link
• Report this comment

Prof – She has no reason to be upset. He didn’t invite them to a night out on the town. He just simply said stop through. My HUSBAND (as opposed to a bf) probably would have sprung for the entire bill, but I wouldn’t necessarily EXPECT him to. AND, it’s his damn money, he can do what he’d like to with it….

• Link
• Report this comment

I believe she’s 37 and he’s 34

@Leggs!

when a woman is getting her ears, i mean 2 labia pulled,u cant tell her nothing!

U dont wanna be the enemy,do u??

• Link
• Report this comment

Prof: If I was your friend I would have picked up my $40 and just paid for my ish and would have told ole girl you cheer her azz up on your own dime and then I would have smoothed out my baby hair and stepped!

Slim: Thank but I am a Doctor. Oh and I just bought one of those old leather football helments. The Doctor is in now!!!

For Real likes the hussies! Why can’t two grown people talk about sex on the first date. Hell if it wasn’t for sex neither one (aka the man) wouldn’t be there in the first place.

• Link
• Report this comment

@mqew I totally agree with you on that 3:29 after all it is his damn money.

• Link
• Report this comment

@Prof?

re:3.30

it may also depend on whether i like the friend or not..so many things here at play.

But its not gentlemanly to do that coz really,its only $15.00 diffrence.

If it were me, i wld pre-empt the situation if i didnt wanna pay or i didnt have enough.

If i do have the money, i will pay,whether the other friend chic offers or not..if her azz/mind is broke,thats on her!

• Link
• Report this comment

@mqew

If I’m friends with both, they should BOF know better

• Link
• Report this comment

@Melo I did not think about how he felt about her friend. He never mentioned anything bad about her friend so I guess he was ok with her.

@DreamsM…I can see it going down like that…his GF is real funny. Shoot, she got me beat!

• Link
• Report this comment

Melo – That’s what I’m thinking. I have a friend my SO can’t stand. If I was able to drag him out with her around I know good and gosh-darn well he AIN’T paying for her.

If it’s another friend that he likes, it would be his “pleasure” to pay… But, it’s still his damn loot and I don’t obligate his funds in regards to some other female. What part is that…

• Link
• Report this comment

“Now when do I find out the relevance of these things?” – First put this eyepatch on and start that Lou Rawls record.

• Link
• Report this comment

Dude was not wrong for not paying for the friend. It would have been a nice gesture, but he didn’t. So what?

• Link
• Report this comment

DAng Unless she’s both of our friends Leroy Loves That..

• Link
• Report this comment

mqew/Proff?

ol girl shld have checked on that upfront too to see if dude was gonna cover the tab or not be4 they ordered.
Dont embarras ur boyfriend after speaking highly of him to ur BFF in his absence.

@Proff?? Does the friend now have a sponsor or she still flying solo still?

• Link
• Report this comment

Dan – Why? How many times have you had to practice the creep-mode

DK – You hush as well. I didn’t mean it like that…

• Link
• Report this comment

@mqew

Lately – none

But juslike ridina-bike

• Link
• Report this comment

Afternoon Peeps!

My boss’s 50th bday today & HIS boss told us to go all out. So we did! Had a blowout over-the-hill party, complete with cane, Bengay, Polygrip, Grecian Formula, etc! One lady had her father to build us a small coffin, which we used as a decorative prop for the bags of potato chips! Good food – he loves lemon pepper wings & greek pasta salad. I made some of my famous lemonade. Party was off the chain!

That tab-for-friends thing can be tricky. He really didn’t “invite” per se, just said roll thru. In my younger days, my bf probably didn’t have the money to cover everybody, so we’d probably all would go dutch, with him maybe throwing in a little extra for me. Nowadays, my man would probably pay all no sweat, unless is was a whopper of a bill. Wouldn’t sweat over $55, but some may not have it like that, times are hard, can’t assume.

• Link
• Report this comment

@Kimmie/Melo

Even if I broke a $100 bill to pay my $40, the money still wouldn’t be the issue.

It’s obligating me without speaking to me about it first, it’s the assumption.

I bet ole dude couldn’t mention a 3sum during there little soiree without some offense? I won’t assume isht about/for you, don’t do it to me.

• Link
• Report this comment

@Professor

I’m going to assume on your 3:18 post that the guy covered his and his GF part of the tab and left her BFF to cover her own. In that case, I see no problem with that. But why is his girl frontin’ on his dime? If she was that concerned the GF should’ve picked up the entire tab herself.

• Link
• Report this comment

yeah yeah yeah…….

being broke aint an offense!

• Link
• Report this comment

then I would have smoothed out my baby hair and stepped!

This is killing me so softly.

• Link
• Report this comment

That tab-for-friends thing can be tricky

Very true statement. I generally try to avoid being in parties greater than 5-6 people because drama and shortages toward the total tab increase exponentially with more people. People ordering entrees but throw down appetizer money, forget to add gratuity or simply ‘forget’ their tab and skip before the bill comes. And this was with a group of people from a professional organization who should’ve had the resources to pay their share…

• Link
• Report this comment

being broke aint an offense!
How does being broke factor into the equation? The friend can pay for herself or get her own man to pick up her tab.

• Link
• Report this comment

@Proff?? Does the friend now have a sponsor or she still flying solo still?

@Melo I will have to ask him, because he is my friend not his GF and her broke BFF. I will see if she is still in need of a sponsor.

@Kimmie, I wish you could send me a plate via the blog.

• Link
• Report this comment

Grapevine was Dude was planning on smashing and luring chic to the hotel to collect her dues
Seems dude had the game all twisted. He would have had a better shot if he had just stepped up and paid. Why didn’t you all put him up on game man? lol

• Link
• Report this comment

Why didn’t you all put him up on game man?

@Dreamz??

we heard about that after the facts!

• Link
• Report this comment

I stand corrected, Melo, she’s 40 and he’s 37.

• Link
• Report this comment

big money 6-figures and I am not talking about 105K and two of those heiffers skipped out on the tab. I was .38 .45 hot.
This is why I don’t like going out in big groups like that. Even if the restaurant separates the tabs, people still argue over who’s tab the appetizer goes on. Then everyone doesn’t always have the same tipping philosophies, so it’s just ends up being a mess.

• Link
• Report this comment

He would have sat at that table watching us eat since he foolishly left his wallet at the hotel.

• Link
• Report this comment

This is why I don’t like going out in big groups like that.

Dreams, me either!

• Link
• Report this comment

sorry a$$ joe blows….

• Link
• Report this comment

melo – It’s not your fault. I’m just questioning his incredibly stupid thought process.
As stupid as this is, it does make you wonder though if this tactic has been successful in the past.

• Link
• Report this comment

@DreamsM ~ no doubt it has. We all check to make sure we have id and money before stepping out the door if only for the mere fact that we are African American!!!

• Link
• Report this comment

Dreams – I guess it depends on what one defines as successful. If the goal is to get a free meal, it was a smashing success. Some people are all out for what they can get, crooks really, always pulling some kind of con, always after the “hook-up”. I know plenty folks that way & yes they get over quite a bit. But every dog has their day. You hate to see folks like that coming, cause eventually everyone peeps their game.

If it’s to get women, well it may have worked with some lame women for awhile, but, like I said above, every dog has it’s day. Didn’t work THIS time, that’s for sure!

• Link
• Report this comment

THEN join the rest of the group at the table

@Slimone??

coz u afraid to say” we goin dutch?”

• Link
• Report this comment

Some of y’all have some odd friends. Since the invention of separate checks, I enjoy group dining. Pretty painless.

We do make sure upfront that the restaurant we chose will do separate checks tho.

• Link
• Report this comment

“smashing success”

LOL!!

Dreams – You’re right! And yeah, if that’s you’re only goal & you finese it right, say the right things, and catch a person at a weak moment, say after a few drinks or if they are feeling low, sure!

It just reeks of stuff I used to encounter when I was much younger, from other equally young guys! Just have gotten too old for stuff like that now. So yeah, a grown up should rule out such tiredness!LOL!!

• Link
• Report this comment