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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Reaction to the ‘Nightline’ debate on successful black women’s romantic woes

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Sherri Shepard (left) and VH1 star Jacque Reid represented for the ladies on ABC ‘Nightlline: Face-Off” debate, ‘Why can't a successful black woman find a man?’, It was taped earlier this month (April 2010) in Decatur, Ga (ABC/Guy D'Alema)

I hoped you watched ABC’s Nightline last night! I always find it fascinating how much production goes into a piece that airs. Of course, they have to edit a great deal but I think they highlighted the key points of the discussion!  The debate that aired last night hit on a couple of interesting points.

I recall Hill Harper saying that 95% of professional women want the top 5% of men who they see as their counterparts.  I have my oh so brilliant Love Squad on deck to answer our own face-off questions:

Is it a misconception that Atlanta women are looking for highly educated, successful men?  Or is there a grain of truth to this? Considering the many single professional black women I know and meet in the city,  I honestly can not think of many that only date corporate/executive, pro ball players. What do you think?

Bren Herrera, 30, Atlanta. Education:  Post-Graduate.  Industry: Entertainment

“I’ve seen a plethora of women that seek that prototypical man–the baller, the pro player, the actor, singer, etc… I’ve had conversations with these “tangibly” driven women.  Sherri underscored this point, from the other side when she mentioned the man at Home Depot whom didn’t call her back because she was on TV–he didn’t want to deal with the things he perceived come along with the entertainment personalities. As a woman, I feel her on that. At the end of the day, I’ll subscribe to the cliché: I just want a good man. A man that I can first trust at ALL times, not just when he’s behaving well. A man that extends himself, is open to learning new things and is willing to compromise. A man that goes to God for answers and not his single boys that can potentially lead him in the wrong direction (because we all know men are just as vulnerable as women are!)

Craig T. Taylor, 34.  Sandy Springs, GA. Occupation: Founder and Editorial Director of Indakno.com, LLC.

Women should not be looking for a man.  That is where they fail.  Whosoever findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD. Proverbs 18:22.  Just make yourself available as a woman and the right man will find you.  Position is relative. I think women just generally want a “good man”.  Loyal, honest, respectful, responsible, passionate, and loves God.  What else can you ask for in a “good man”.  If a man has these traits, it does not matter if he is making 25k or 125k.  He will always be doing the BEST that he can and trying to do better.  Any person that is looking for someone to match them equally is looking for a boring relationship and may as well be with themselves.  It does not take two corporate executives to have a successful relationship.  It takes two people who love, respect, and has an undeniable passion about each other to make it work.

Dr. Tartt responds to my Love Squad question: Do you believe there are special hurdles Atlanta professionals face in finding a partner?

Your turn to weigh in my insightful readers: Professional Atlanta singles certainly enjoy the good life, but have we lost sight of what is truly important like family, raising healthy children, and building good relationships?

925 comments Add your comment

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 22nd, 2010
2:07 pm

I got in my car to head home from lunch and this daggone topic was on the radio too. Grrr….!!!!

I went to essence.com and it was plastered up there,too.

PrincessNik

April 22nd, 2010
2:08 pm

BlindSide

GREAT MOVIE!

lady j, usually i don’t like the movies that have so much critical acclaim, but i loved this one.
haven’t seen date night though.

Leggs

April 22nd, 2010
2:08 pm

“I am not apologizing for saying it. But I won’t joke about it anymore.”

That’s even funnier!

Leggs

April 22nd, 2010
2:08 pm

But not in a good way!

BlackMagicWoman

April 22nd, 2010
2:09 pm

DAN…Good LORD….yes I did! :lol

SASSY..my ex back home is one well endowed Serbian! :lol: But I guess I was doing too good of a job because he got excited and well…blocked a chica’s airways!

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA THE GOD OF WAR

April 22nd, 2010
2:09 pm

Carlito – Theres nothing wrong with apologizing for a mistake.. It doesnt show youre weak because you apologized.. It actually shows youre weak for not apologizing.. Because in truth you never want to offend your friends.. Capiche..

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
2:09 pm

Blindside, I did not go see. I do not like those feel good movies. Date Night is on my list to see/download. :)

Raqi

April 22nd, 2010
2:09 pm

and I had to quickly turn it off too

Leggs and Amazon, I actually was looking forward to watching the Nightline program last night but fell asleep before it came on. I was interested just for who was on the panel. But when the marido came in and turned off the light my lights went out. I fell asleep before I knew it and it was only about 5 minutes before the NL episode was to air.

Lady J-Count your Blessings, Cut your loses, & Follow the yellow brick road!

April 22nd, 2010
2:10 pm

Artful Persuasion you went deep!!!! good points!

AmazonRed™

April 22nd, 2010
2:11 pm

Carlito – Don’t mind the sensitive ones on here. Good grief, why are we even still talking about it?!

Lady J-Count your Blessings, Cut your loses, & Follow the yellow brick road!

April 22nd, 2010
2:11 pm

thanks you too!!!!!!!!

Lady J-Count your Blessings, Cut your loses, & Follow the yellow brick road!

April 22nd, 2010
2:11 pm

dag meant TWO for the skeptics! ha!

AmazonRed™

April 22nd, 2010
2:12 pm

I actually was looking forward to watching the Nightline program last night but fell asleep before it came on

:lol:

I was up, I think I was watching what the hype about Chilli’s show was about.

I checked Facebook and noticed that plenty of my black male friends were watching the Nightline special and none of my black female friends were.

I hope the brotha’s learned something.

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
2:12 pm

Infamous, I understand what you are saying once again. But I am not the type to give an empty apology. If I felt it would be sincere I have no problem doing so. But I don’t. The joke made sense in my mind, but not anyone else’s. During the aftermath, I just decided not to try and explain it and count it as a lesson learned. There was an irony to joining all 3 groups that I listed in that one entry.

Raqi

April 22nd, 2010
2:13 pm

LadyJ, I want to see Date Night. The marido and I may go see it on our next date night.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 22nd, 2010
2:13 pm

he got excited and well…blocked a chica’s airways!

:shock: Oh my!!

BlackMagicyou gone get me in trouble in here…got me laughing all loud n stuff….can barely type chile.

i'm swiss

April 22nd, 2010
2:13 pm

@ BlackMagic — Well, I’m glad you pulled through, ‘cos that one be one embarrassing way to bite the dyck — I mean dust. ;-)

PrincessNik

April 22nd, 2010
2:14 pm

@ Lady J

I want to see death at a funeral, i heard it was hilarious. The newbie and I have plans to go this weekend.

Raqi

April 22nd, 2010
2:14 pm

Amazon, I wish it would not have come on so late. But oh well. From what I hear I didn’t miss anything that has not been said and misstated hundreds of times.

Luvbug

April 22nd, 2010
2:15 pm

I checked Facebook and noticed that plenty of my black male friends were watching the Nightline special and none of my black female friends were.

That’s funny.

PrincessNik

April 22nd, 2010
2:15 pm

BlackMagic — Well, I’m glad you pulled through, ‘cos that one be one embarrassing way to bite the dyck — I mean dust

reminds me of color purple

Celie: how’d he die

stepmom: on top of me

Melo

April 22nd, 2010
2:15 pm

@Carlito??

There is only one authentic “Lurker” tho?? Female..high school diploma,”good” job,drives a benz she says. Cant remember her birfday!! :lol:

It may have been her and not any of the fake ones.

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA THE GOD OF WAR

April 22nd, 2010
2:15 pm

Boy folks always sticking their nose where it dont belong..

Carlito – You still my Guy and I fcuks with ya.. And dont mind these little girls who cant ever shut up to save their lives..

Raqi

April 22nd, 2010
2:16 pm

Princess is “Death at a funeral” the one with Chris Rock and Martin?

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
2:16 pm

Infamous, I just notice you threw “capiche” in there. LOL :)

Melo

April 22nd, 2010
2:16 pm

@Luvbug??!!

none of my black female friends were.

That’s funny.

NO..Thats Angst! :lol:

PrincessNik

April 22nd, 2010
2:17 pm

@ Raqi, yes and Tracy Morgan, and Danny Glover basically an all star cast

I’m hoping it will be as funny as Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins, which i had to see twice cause i was laughing so hard the first time i was missing stuff.

AmazonRed™

April 22nd, 2010
2:17 pm

Boy folks always sticking their nose where it dont belong..

:lol: @ folks who still don’t get this is a public blog and not a private message.

i'm swiss

April 22nd, 2010
2:18 pm

On the flip side, I’ve come darn close to losing consciousness while servicing Mrs. Swiss when she clamps down on my head with those thighs… Boo’s got some strong legs, I tell ya… :lol:

DreamsMaterialize

April 22nd, 2010
2:18 pm

he got excited and well…blocked a chica’s airways!
Shyt that sucks. Things do happen though. gotta give it up to the game.

SexyCool

April 22nd, 2010
2:18 pm

As it happens, Carlito, you did apologize….at 1105a.

“the humor makes sense in my mind. Sorry if I offended you.”

But I get what you’re saying.

Luvbug

April 22nd, 2010
2:18 pm

Melo – No, that’s funny.

Raqi

April 22nd, 2010
2:18 pm

It may have been her and not any of the fake ones.

Melo, I was thinking the same thing since the comment was just a simple question and not a name calling jab or something.

Why she uses that moniker I don’t know because she gets all the heat anytime someone else post crap using “lurker”.

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA THE GOD OF WAR

April 22nd, 2010
2:18 pm

Carlito – I got ya joke homie but in certain circles that might cause a few problems.. Thats all im saying.. Again.. I know what you meant thats why I didnt say anything earlier.. But you were out of line for it.. We talked like Men are supposed to do and we good. And cleared the air for those that were still struggling with it.. I hope.

Lady J-Count your Blessings, Cut your loses, & Follow the yellow brick road!

April 22nd, 2010
2:19 pm

Ladies I hope to get date night in on a date night soon! I wanna laugh my tail off! LOL

AmazonRed™

April 22nd, 2010
2:20 pm

I hear I didn’t miss anything that has not been said and misstated hundreds of times.

Raqi – I’m sure you didn’t! Besides, you got your manz! :lol:

As I said yesterday, it was an open forum and it took place on a Friday night. It started at 6 pm and didn’t end til close to midnight (I hear). What a waste of a Friday night when the folks in the audience could have been out living and meeting folks. :lol:

Raqi

April 22nd, 2010
2:20 pm

I’m hoping it will be as funny as Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins

Princess, yeah I know. I like that movie too. I hate when they preview a movie and show all the good parts in the previews just to reel you in but when you see the full length movie you be like is this what I wasted my money and time to see. LOL

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
2:20 pm

Melo, I can not tell any of the lurkers apart.

Lady J-Count your Blessings, Cut your loses, & Follow the yellow brick road!

April 22nd, 2010
2:23 pm

I’ve got the power hey yeah heh
I’ve got the power
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh yeah-eah-eah-eah-eah-eah
I’ve got the power
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh yeah-eah-eah-eah-eah-eah
Gettin’ kinda heavy

It’s gettin’ it’s gettin’ it’s gettin’ kinda hectic
It’s gettin’ it’s gettin’ it’s gettin’ kinda hectic
It’s gettin’ it’s gettin’ it’s gettin’ kinda hectic
It’s gettin’ it’s gettin’ it’s gettin’ kinda hectic

Raqi

April 22nd, 2010
2:23 pm

Besides, you got your manz!

Amazon, Yep but I like Sherri Shepard as an actress and was very interested in what she had to say on the topic. And I wanted to hear what Hill Harper was inputing because I am kinda on the fence with him. LOL

Melo

April 22nd, 2010
2:23 pm

one well endowed Serbian! But I guess I was doing too good of a job because he got excited and well…blocked a chica’s airways!

@BMW!!

dDng,that hit me real hard and its not easy picturing u in my mind.

Right now,im holding my left cheeck with my left hand and just ruminating. :-)

Lady J-Count your Blessings, Cut your loses, & Follow the yellow brick road!

April 22nd, 2010
2:24 pm

PK enjoy the date and the movie!!!!! happy for you chica!

kimmie-livin my golden life

April 22nd, 2010
2:24 pm

Amred – I don’t know anyone, male or female, who was going to watch it. Everybody I know, whether coupled up or not, is too busy living to sit around and watch a bunch of bitter folks beyotch!

I’d rather watch/listen to a good political discussion. Now those get my blood boiling!

PrincessNik

April 22nd, 2010
2:24 pm

but when you see the full length movie you be like is this what I wasted my money and time to see. LOL

@Raqi

exactly, I am known for the statement I wouldnt’ mind seeing that when it comes out on DVD LOL

Lady J-Count your Blessings, Cut your loses, & Follow the yellow brick road!

April 22nd, 2010
2:26 pm

Roscoe Jenkins was funny I am a Martin fan for LIFE~!!!!!! Next Chris Rock!!!!!!! Great Comics! A shout out to Richard Pryor for paving the way!!!!!!!

I like Eddie Murphy too in a weird kind of way…..he’s eccentric to say the least…..

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
2:26 pm

Swiss, great way to die.

Infamous, I see you there.

SexyCool, cool :)

AmazonRed™

April 22nd, 2010
2:26 pm

And I wanted to hear what Hill Harper was inputing because I am kinda on the fence with him. LOL

:lol:

I bought his book. Since I bought Steve Harvey’s I felt I should give Hill a lil love. I haven’t finished it yet. It’s a lot more complex than Steve’s and really, I am over the topic.

But I can say that I’ve heard Hill as he was making the book tour rounds and he knows he is part of the problem, which is why he wrote the book. He casted off many women for petty infractions. He did say on one radio interview that he plans to be married in the next couple of years. I don’t know how he’s doing with that goal tho.

Raqi

April 22nd, 2010
2:27 pm

I am known for the statement I wouldnt’ mind seeing that when it comes out on DVD

Princess, like “Precious”. Heck I am not even going to rent nor buy that DVD. Imma wait until it comes on ABC for free. LOL

Lady J-Count your Blessings, Cut your loses, & Follow the yellow brick road!

April 22nd, 2010
2:27 pm

Kimmie I was playing with my new tow!!!! My HP Compaq Laptop!!!!! LOL my TV never came on as I listened to Alexander O’Neal’s Pandora station last night!!!!!! LOL!

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
2:28 pm

Raqi, when Julia and I saw Hill Harper on Celebrity Jeopardy. She was surprised at how short and “different” looking he was.