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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Reaction to the ‘Nightline’ debate on successful black women’s romantic woes

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Sherri Shepard (left) and VH1 star Jacque Reid represented for the ladies on ABC ‘Nightlline: Face-Off” debate, ‘Why can't a successful black woman find a man?’, It was taped earlier this month (April 2010) in Decatur, Ga (ABC/Guy D'Alema)

I hoped you watched ABC’s Nightline last night! I always find it fascinating how much production goes into a piece that airs. Of course, they have to edit a great deal but I think they highlighted the key points of the discussion!  The debate that aired last night hit on a couple of interesting points.

I recall Hill Harper saying that 95% of professional women want the top 5% of men who they see as their counterparts.  I have my oh so brilliant Love Squad on deck to answer our own face-off questions:

Is it a misconception that Atlanta women are looking for highly educated, successful men?  Or is there a grain of truth to this? Considering the many single professional black women I know and meet in the city,  I honestly can not think of many that only date corporate/executive, pro ball players. What do you think?

Bren Herrera, 30, Atlanta. Education:  Post-Graduate.  Industry: Entertainment

“I’ve seen a plethora of women that seek that prototypical man–the baller, the pro player, the actor, singer, etc… I’ve had conversations with these “tangibly” driven women.  Sherri underscored this point, from the other side when she mentioned the man at Home Depot whom didn’t call her back because she was on TV–he didn’t want to deal with the things he perceived come along with the entertainment personalities. As a woman, I feel her on that. At the end of the day, I’ll subscribe to the cliché: I just want a good man. A man that I can first trust at ALL times, not just when he’s behaving well. A man that extends himself, is open to learning new things and is willing to compromise. A man that goes to God for answers and not his single boys that can potentially lead him in the wrong direction (because we all know men are just as vulnerable as women are!)

Craig T. Taylor, 34.  Sandy Springs, GA. Occupation: Founder and Editorial Director of Indakno.com, LLC.

Women should not be looking for a man.  That is where they fail.  Whosoever findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD. Proverbs 18:22.  Just make yourself available as a woman and the right man will find you.  Position is relative. I think women just generally want a “good man”.  Loyal, honest, respectful, responsible, passionate, and loves God.  What else can you ask for in a “good man”.  If a man has these traits, it does not matter if he is making 25k or 125k.  He will always be doing the BEST that he can and trying to do better.  Any person that is looking for someone to match them equally is looking for a boring relationship and may as well be with themselves.  It does not take two corporate executives to have a successful relationship.  It takes two people who love, respect, and has an undeniable passion about each other to make it work.

Dr. Tartt responds to my Love Squad question: Do you believe there are special hurdles Atlanta professionals face in finding a partner?

Your turn to weigh in my insightful readers: Professional Atlanta singles certainly enjoy the good life, but have we lost sight of what is truly important like family, raising healthy children, and building good relationships?

925 comments Add your comment

Melo

April 22nd, 2010
12:50 pm

Now do you really think an AA woman would go for that one?

@Proff??

to me, AA women are easy to maintain.

they want all the attention,the respect and the money.

As long as she cooking at home and im giving her the good and she giving me the psh..she can have me…I dont have to tell her im going to africa..i be going on bizzness trips to europe! :lol: :lol:

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 22nd, 2010
12:51 pm

Correction: It wasn’t a video it was her perfomance on Idol…maybe it was the outfit or the way is was cut or something…I’on know.

Kym--Happy Earth Day!!

April 22nd, 2010
12:51 pm

LOL @Swiss..Cheetarah..

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
12:53 pm

Here is a Clip form season 3 with Thugnificent and Will.I.AM video entitled “Dyck Riding Obama”
http://www.boondocksbootleg.com/profiles/blogs/new-season-3-clip-wiliam-feat

Luvbug

April 22nd, 2010
12:53 pm

BMW

Thundercats used to be my show. LOL

Professor

April 22nd, 2010
12:53 pm

@Kym yea this week has been hell on the BW I am ready for my weekend getaway.

@Melo I just think the cooking thing is overrated or maybe it is not a big deal for some men. I have seen some married women that did not cook and their husbands loved them to pieces and worshipped their dirty draws.

Where is serious I forgot to ask him about the cooking thingy.

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA THE GOD OF WAR

April 22nd, 2010
12:53 pm

Sassy – Imma always read bitter when it something you dont wanna hear or if I step on ya toes.. I dont mean too but I gotta give you the 100.

Leggs

April 22nd, 2010
12:55 pm

Ok, 5 pages and it’s 12:55. Too much to read, whatcha talking about now?

Dan

April 22nd, 2010
12:55 pm

The oldest joke in the book:

How come when Lion-O goes ‘thunder, thunder, thundercats ho!! Is she always the first to show up?

See, she gets bagged on and ain’t black or human.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 22nd, 2010
12:56 pm

That female Thunder Cat (can’t remember her name) always gave me pre-pubescent wood.

Swissie her name was “Cheetarah”…don’t feel bad I used to think the leader Lion-o was the shyt when I watched that cartoon.

BlackMagicWoman

April 22nd, 2010
12:57 pm

SWISS….her name is Cheetarah! I want to play her so bad in the movie! :lol:

CARLITO….I LOVE YOU! :lol: You just Boondocks’d me!

Dan

April 22nd, 2010
12:57 pm

Wait…BMW…you watched thundercats and he-man? What are your thoughts on the “joe’s”?

Professor

April 22nd, 2010
12:57 pm

I like Dukes of Hazords too folks….how did I forget BossHog!

@Lady J that was the Friday night lineup if I remember correctly…Dukes of Hazards, Dallas and Falcon Crest.

@Melo alrighty than :grin: Now will Queen go back home just like that, can you really send her back she might snap on your azz you know some AA women have schooled her. :grin:

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
12:58 pm

Kym, did you see when A Pimp Named Slick Back, was helping Tom get his woman back “from” Usher?

APNSB” Tom, you have to hit the b*tch”

Tom:”I am not that type, I will not hit her”

APNSB”Tom, has not hitting her helped you?”

Tom”I WILL NOT DO THAT SIR”

APNSB”We all have phobias,some cant cross bridges, some cant hit a b*tch”

Then when Tom got the nerve to hit her when he caught her with Usher and ended up slapping Usher instead of her. LOL :)

SexyCool

April 22nd, 2010
12:59 pm

Granddad: Hold on there, Slickback.
A Pimp Named Slickback: No, it’s A Pimp Named Slickback.
Granddad: That’s what I said. Slickback.
A Pimp Named Slickback: No, it’s “A Pimp Named Slickback.” Like A Tribe Called Quest; you say the whole thing: “A Pimp Named Slickback”!

i'm swiss

April 22nd, 2010
1:00 pm

“How come when Lion-O goes ‘thunder, thunder, thundercats ho!! Is she always the first to show up?”

@ Dan — One of the funniest things about my 1 year as an English teacher was having the kids read through Shakespeare in class and hearing “What ho!” become “What, ho?” :lol:

BlackMagicWoman

April 22nd, 2010
1:00 pm

CARLITO…I spend my lunch break in the park looking at Boondocks episodes on my Ipod and that was an episode I just watch on Tuesday! CLASSIC!

DAN….Joe’s…as in GI JOE? I LOVE that cartoon man!

Melo

April 22nd, 2010
1:00 pm

I have seen some married women that did not cook and their husbands loved them to pieces and worshipped their dirty draws

@Prof??

the men have some woman cooking for them and they proly phluckking that woman on the side.

One thing thats true in america,it is expensive to divorce so the men roll with what they got,giving u all the smokescreen, appearance of bliss with the wife.

What average men out there like to or have the money to spend on junk food??

If u cannot cook now Proff but want a man down the road, up ur game up coz i dont want u to willow in dissillussionment of singlehhood!

cooking and PSH = must haves for any woman

Raqi

April 22nd, 2010
1:00 pm

I am going to focus on my DIY projects

Kym, I am going to be taking on some projects around the house when the boy gets out of school for the summer. I may as well use him while I have him around the house. He can get a job after I am done with him. LOL

I was just saying last night I want to paint downstairs and that lead to me wanting to do some other things.

There is a bathroom downstairs basement are that is quite unattractive but it was there when I bought the house. It was used as a guest bathroom that was outside of a makeshift guest room at the time. Since then I have renovated the guest room and added a new bathroom in the room and have total built in the basement area to include a television room for my boys when their friends would come over. I left that bathroom as is so that they could use it instead of messing up the guest bathroom or having to go upstairs. I hope to get started on it by the middle of June.

I think I am going to take on washing all the windows inside and out next week. That is going to be a chore in itself.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 22nd, 2010
1:00 pm

Imma always read bitter when it something you dont wanna hear or if I step on ya toes.. I dont mean too but I gotta give you the 100.

A hit dog will holler :lol: Let the air out dude and get better…stop tryna pick me. :lol: :mrgreen:

Didn’t Carley Simon have a song like that and everybody was tryna figure out who she was talkin’ about…folks guessed left and right and never got it.

You’re so vaaaaaaiiin…I bet you think this song is about you,don’t you

i'm swiss

April 22nd, 2010
1:01 pm

“SWISS….her name is Cheetarah! I want to play her so bad in the movie! “

@ BlackMagic — I have a video camera & some free time, so that can be arranged:lol:

BlackMagicWoman

April 22nd, 2010
1:02 pm

Boondocks episode: Attack of the Kung-Fu Killer Wolf-B*tch!

“FINISH HIM……Flawless victory…Luna wins”! That psycho-b*tch was off the chain.

Melo

April 22nd, 2010
1:02 pm

Now will Queen go back home just like that, can you really send her back she might snap on your azz

@Proff

snap back is for heiffers or women who dont want a man anymore

either way,she snaps back,we aint tgether no more!

My rules are simple!

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 22nd, 2010
1:03 pm

I am going to be taking on some projects around the house when the boy gets out of school for the summer. I may as well use him while I have him around the house. He can get a job after I am done with him.

OMG!! That was us during the summer when I was growing up…my mommy would have us doing all sorts of stuff around/on/in the house. Talk about free labor….she got it for sho.

SexyCool

April 22nd, 2010
1:03 pm

Rock – further to your car analogy – there are also too many folks got Mercedes/BMW standards when they are on Ford Focus level.

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
1:03 pm

Grand Dad: There will be no hitting women in this house.

Everyone Else: What women, this here is a hoe

bert5200

April 22nd, 2010
1:03 pm

How about this: Everyone get some professional help to deal with all of that baggage. I went for a year….it helps

Lady J-Count your Blessings, Cut your loses, & Follow the yellow brick road!

April 22nd, 2010
1:03 pm

I profess in college in orangeburg and to this day I watch and love the Andy Griffith show and when I was little and use to help my grandma shell and snap peas we watch Gunsmoke!!!!!!!

Professor I could watch that line up right now you listed and slumber all day!

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 22nd, 2010
1:03 pm

I have a video camera & some free time, so that can be arranged…

:lol: :lol:

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA THE GOD OF WAR

April 22nd, 2010
1:05 pm

Sass – He who throws rocks should never try and hide their hands.. And a record cant tell ya.. But you can rest assured Ol Dk will.. And do it with love..

You still my fav Trini.. I trying to see ya do that dance I like.. We aint gonna always agree but I fcuks with ya always..

Kym--Happy Earth Day!!

April 22nd, 2010
1:06 pm

@Carlito..I have that episode on my pod..I love Riley’s little speech to him..

Riley: So this the message you want to send to the youth like myself out here trying to do the right thing..and not love these h@s huh..

What’s all this? What this right here? is this what hot on the streets? That’s what really hood. All for some white girl who left you for a sexy, flexy a$$, dancing, a$$????

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA THE GOD OF WAR

April 22nd, 2010
1:08 pm

RAqi – For the record.. I dont have a problem with flip flops that much anymore..

Dan

April 22nd, 2010
1:08 pm

@BMW

Uh, oh.

I see you though…

@Swiss

That’s how we read it intially in the SWAT’s We had to be told how to enunciate it correctly.

And to the Boondocks fans..right on

Attack of the kung fu killer wolf….hilarious. When Huey kept trying and she was doing him…

Professor

April 22nd, 2010
1:09 pm

Melo,

You are ruling with an iron fist if she cannot snap back and say dude I am staying in the US of A.

Oh yea, I am helluva cook I just don’t cook often. I am not into cooking everyday. During the week I like the simple healthy stuff a good salad or a potato loaded on that southwestern style. I do these shrimp/pasta salads stuff like that since it is just me. Don’t get me wrong I can throwdown on the heavy stuff too. :grin:

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
1:09 pm

BlackMagicWoman, “Catcher Freeman” that episode was funny. Did you hear what the slaves were singing?
“Lord, wont you take our black a$$es out of here(clap, clap) oh lord wont you take our black a$$es out of here, won;t you come by here Catcher and kill all these cr*ckers, Lord take our black a$$es out of here”
then the one slave with the high voice sings out in loud melody”Sing this muthaph*cka now!!” and they start over

Aaron Mcgruder wrote it, I just watch it.

Lady J-Count your Blessings, Cut your loses, & Follow the yellow brick road!

April 22nd, 2010
1:10 pm

Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened….say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind………stay focus chica!

daily vent!

Leggs

April 22nd, 2010
1:11 pm

I have TMJ and am so hungry…I am struggling to eat this sandwich now wishing I opted for the less filling plain baked potato.

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
1:11 pm

Riley: “I can see if you lost your girl to T.I., but to a sexy flexy a$$ like Usher??”

Professor

April 22nd, 2010
1:11 pm

For the record.. I dont have a problem with flip flops that much anymore

Ms. Flip flops changed that :grin: DK and flip flops sitting in the tree K-i-s-s-i-n-g…

Professor

April 22nd, 2010
1:14 pm

Leggs are you making any smoothies to help? There are some recipes are there that are pretty filling with oatmeal and other stuff.

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
1:14 pm

Booty butt booty butt booty butt cheeks. Booty babooty babooty booty butt cheeks.

Carlito

April 22nd, 2010
1:15 pm

What is TMJ?

Where is Slim and I Am?

Leggs

April 22nd, 2010
1:16 pm

That is funny, no more aversion to flip flops! One for the Gipper!

Melo

April 22nd, 2010
1:16 pm

Don’t get me wrong I can throwdown on the heavy stuff too

@Proff??

see, i knew u can do it…im gon work with u so i may slide a worthy contender ur way.

fist if she cannot snap back and say dude I am staying in the US of A.

Im glad she aint drank the AA women coolaid and forgotten the rules of our marriage game..at least not yet……

Kym--Happy Earth Day!!

April 22nd, 2010
1:16 pm

All time favorite episodes..Gangstalious!!!

Raqi

April 22nd, 2010
1:16 pm

SexyCool girl ain’t that the truth.

Mercedes don’t care who buys it but those trying to buy need to be able to afford it.

There were guys way up in the Elite that I never even wanted or attempted to date because they were just not the right fit for me. It’s not my mindset or my desired idea of a lifestyle to be with one of them. I would have been out of my league because I just can’t get with it.

I can’t afford it emotionally or mentally. It’s too much of a price to pay.

DreamsMaterialize

April 22nd, 2010
1:16 pm

Kym yea this week has been hell on the BW I am ready for my weekend getaway.
Kym and Prof refer to my 12:28pm and then come by the Blog Bar for your special drink of the day: La Luz que Calenta Mi Alma

i'm swiss

April 22nd, 2010
1:17 pm

“What is TMJ?”

An excuse not to give PSH.

Did I just say that out loud…? :lol:

Leggs

April 22nd, 2010
1:17 pm

@Prof ~ hadn’t thought about smoothies. Thanks for the thought. Getting jokes about pulverizing my food and sipping through a straw. That I know I won’t do!

Leggs

April 22nd, 2010
1:18 pm

Good one, i’m swiss! :lol: :lol: