Single parent dating
Dating a single parent brings its own set of unique challenges. More often then not, it becomes a real test of how compatible two people really are. I have met some single fathers who have the “single dad dating” thing down. They know how and when to bring up the fact that the have children. They also know the proper time to introduce their significant others.
Others have a hard time with balancing their dating life with the parenthood. I always tell my friends with no children that getting involved with a single mom or dad takes understanding. What kind of advice would you give someone who is dating a single parent? If you are a single parent, how do you manage to work, parent, and date?
I dated one guy who waited weeks to tell me that he had a son. It was a huge red flag because he was keeping a lot of things hidden from me. What would you do if you discovered the person you were dating had a child or children?
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373 comments Add your comment
Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)
April 20th, 2010
12:17 pm
dude does read kinda familiar….I’m jus’ sayin……
AmazonRed™
April 20th, 2010
12:17 pm
But guess what – I’ve got sense enough not to ASK or EXPECT you to choose between me & ya kid! So get the chip off of your shoulders!
kimmie – Great point. I do believe the spouse comes first in a marriage. But that doesn’t mean a choice has to be made.
I just don’t see how a child will know how know life isn’t all about them if all you do is make it about them. They need to respect their parents and authority. But like I said before, it’s a tough call when the kid has been there for years before the new parent even comes into the picture.
Carlito
April 20th, 2010
12:18 pm
PrincessNik, the kids do not live with them. I misunderstood single parent. I thought it was someone who had a child but was not in a relationship with the other parent.
Lady J-An intelligent person is never afraid or ashamed to find errors in his understanding of things....
April 20th, 2010
12:18 pm
yep that is what single parent is to me custodial parent however co parenting has brought a fine balance….I couldn’t imagine using my child as a weapon……I told him he would always be apart of her life bc he wanted her just as much he hasn’t failed yet….
kimmie
April 20th, 2010
12:19 pm
Dreams – Your post is called being grown & being a man & not playing games. Yeah, some folk will use their own kids to be an A—-!
PrincessNik
April 20th, 2010
12:20 pm
Carlito
No problem. But that makes a differnce in the two attitudes you mentioned. When you are the custodial parent and are doing it all, the shuffling to practices, school activities, homework EVERYTHING, yes there will be times you definately want a break from your children, doesnt’ mean you love them any less. And a good non-custodial parent does yearn to spend more time with their child (IMO).
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA MR. DAD D
April 20th, 2010
12:20 pm
But ya’ll are also acting like it aint happened before.. Im sure ya’ll ladies got a friend that her Ex got a new chick and forgot about his obligations.. Or that his NuNU acts like he should be more focussed on his new situation than his old.. Weak n!gga for sure to do that but my point is balance and I’ll never choose between the two, nor will I make her feel any less than what she is to me.. All im saying is the sh!t happens more than we wanna admit but it happens and me personally could never choose a woman over my son. Thats just me. If he doesnt like her its not gonna work.. I dont drama and extra because life is excellent without it.. If its right then the situation will never present itself and I’ll never have to deal with it.. But if it does.. We Roll.. Him and I.. Aquemini..
Carlito
April 20th, 2010
12:20 pm
When a person is paying child support does it matter if the other parent is married or not or if the person paying the child support is married?
mqew - GURU!!!?!!!! R.I.P!!!! - HIP HOP IS dead!
April 20th, 2010
12:21 pm
DK – That’s what I’ve seen. Yes, moms get the HARD end. They’re usually the primary doing most of the day to day activities with their kids…. SO ummm YEAH!
Lady J-An intelligent person is never afraid or ashamed to find errors in his understanding of things....
April 20th, 2010
12:22 pm
marriage is not apart of cs in GA however in sc both incomes pay support as a married couple
Lady J-An intelligent person is never afraid or ashamed to find errors in his understanding of things....
April 20th, 2010
12:22 pm
pk correct me if I am wrong…lol
Beautiful *Absolutely cannot be you.....I'm way too busy being me*
April 20th, 2010
12:22 pm
i loves me some Kels and Pumpkin, but my hubby will always come first. i will respect, follow and support him until death!
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA MR. DAD D
April 20th, 2010
12:23 pm
Dreams M – Exactly its just understood.. You dont have to run around broadcasting your child is first.. You dont even have to mention where they are because they will understand by the level of commitment you show towards your child.. The consistency of what you do..
kimmie
April 20th, 2010
12:24 pm
Amred – I agree. It’s hard to explain it to folk sometimes because they love their kids. But the world does not revolve around your child in anyone else’s world but yours! There has to be a balance.
Carlito
April 20th, 2010
12:24 pm
Lady J, so sometimes if a woman marries a guy with kids and he is paying child support. Her money would then to go to his kids child support?
PrincessNik
April 20th, 2010
12:24 pm
Carlito, no it does not matter.
mqew - GURU!!!?!!!! R.I.P!!!! - HIP HOP IS dead!
April 20th, 2010
12:25 pm
Carlito – True birth control is CHUCKIE CHEESE ON A SATURDAY!!!
I SWEAR that is all you need.
I was there this past Saturday and was like, shoot me now
PrincessNik
April 20th, 2010
12:25 pm
Lady J, that is my understanding also.
SexyCool (still fallin')
April 20th, 2010
12:26 pm
OH…yeah…I was supposed to ask for referrals for a divorce attorney would be reasonably priced to handle a noncontested divorce.
Carlito
April 20th, 2010
12:26 pm
I remember a lady saying to me that something was odd that I have never been married or had kids at my age. Yes there was, I was heartbroken and I never wanted kids. LOL Of course I did not say that to her.
AmazonRed™
April 20th, 2010
12:26 pm
Are dudes really out there telling you all that there kids are first and you never will be?
Well, For Real just did.
PrincessNik
April 20th, 2010
12:26 pm
True birth control is CHUCKIE CHEESE ON A SATURDAY
even i can’t argue with that!
PrincessNik
April 20th, 2010
12:29 pm
so sometimes if a woman marries a guy with kids and he is paying child support. Her money would then to go to his kids child support?
Carlito This is a possiblity, in the end if he doesn’t pay after he gets behind a certain $$ amount, he will end up in jail and possibly a suspended license.
Lady J-An intelligent person is never afraid or ashamed to find errors in his understanding of things....
April 20th, 2010
12:29 pm
by law in SC yes in GA no but if they are one her money will go their way one way or the other….the house money is the house money and kids outside the home benfits when they visit…example summer breaks….I would hope a woman does not ignore that child if she has others say going to the pool and buying lunch….I wouldn’t call my husband for money I would handle it bc I have accepted him and his child they are my family
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA MR. DAD D
April 20th, 2010
12:30 pm
Its funny how people with no kids can always tell you the best way to raise kids.. Its funny because I used to be that way when I didnt have a child and didnt realize that no book or Oprah show can tell you how to raise an individual free thinking child..
PrincessNik
April 20th, 2010
12:30 pm
Off Topic: this new alicia keys song, is hot.
If you ask me i’m ready…….
Carlito
April 20th, 2010
12:30 pm
That’s a doozy.
PrincessNik
April 20th, 2010
12:32 pm
Lady J
12:29 yes! that is my thought also:
if they are one her money will go their way one way or the other….the house money is the house money and kids outside the home benfits when they visit
AmazonRed™
April 20th, 2010
12:32 pm
Its funny how people with no kids can always tell you the best way to raise kids..
This blog is full of folks that think they know more than they do. No matter the topic.
kimmie
April 20th, 2010
12:33 pm
Are dudes really out there telling you all that there kids are first and you never will be?
One guy did it to me. Another used his mama as the scapegoat – told me his mama would always come first. Used to cancel out on me all the time cause his mama “needed” him. Mind you, his mother was not sick or anything & had 7 other grown adult kids that saw to it that she did not want for anything!
Beautiful *Absolutely cannot be you.....I'm way too busy being me*
April 20th, 2010
12:34 pm
*Its funny how people with no kids can always tell you the best way to raise kids*
my older sis does that dumb sh*t! i said out loud one day that what i’m doing is fine and it someone can do better come and pack their sh*t!
Lady J-An intelligent person is never afraid or ashamed to find errors in his understanding of things....
April 20th, 2010
12:34 pm
we hate CC she is scared of the rat but like the games but it is welcomed birth control! LOL
DreamsMaterialize
April 20th, 2010
12:35 pm
From the single father’s at my job, they want more time with their kids
Carlito This is where lots of the Dads get the short end of the stick. They are often portrayed as deadbeats who don’t want to be involved, when that’s not always the case. Lots of dads try to be in their kids’ lives, but the moms don’t always make it easy to do that. some moms even outright prevent the dads from being involved, then turn around and bad mouth him for not being involved. I feel bad for dads in these situations. To truly love your child and be prevented from seeing them out of spite is like a dagger in the heart…shame on the moms out there who do that.
Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)
April 20th, 2010
12:35 pm
True birth control is CHUCKIE CHEESE ON A SATURDAY!!!
OMG!!!! My niece had a birthday party at the one off of Highway 85 in Fayetteville and I sat there the whole time looking around like
. It reminded me of a scene from The Gremlins when they were on the loose just a runnin all over the place…..then I looked across the street and saw an Applebee’s and I wondered how many parents were over there taking a break from the kids. I mean it’s like literally right next door….wonder if that was on purpose?
mqew - GURU!!!?!!!! R.I.P!!!! - HIP HOP IS dead!
April 20th, 2010
12:36 pm
Kimmie – That’s just wrong. Cut the Cord heiffa.
Also – whassup with these Kate + 8 type of families popping up on tv… ENOUGH already! Yes we know YOU think you’re a saint by having 17 kids, but the rest of the world thinks you’re a NUT JOB!!!
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA MR. DAD D
April 20th, 2010
12:36 pm
This blog is full of folks that think they know more than they do. No matter the topic.
Well aint that the pot calling the kettle black..
SexyCool (still fallin')
April 20th, 2010
12:38 pm
I have friends that come to me and talk to me about their kids. All I can do is listen with a blank stare.
When they get done, I hit ‘em with “Now you know I ain’t got no gddamn kids. Why you asking me?”
PrincessNik
April 20th, 2010
12:38 pm
then I looked across the street and saw an Applebee’s and I wondered how many parents were over there taking a break from the kids.
lol, there do tend to be quite a few unsupervised children in Chuck E. Cheese, i hate going in there cause i be ready to ack a fool with back kids. I don’t even babysit without lettin folks know off top if i can’t discipline your child you need to take em wit you cause erything in this house gets some ack right if they get out of line.
PrincessNik
April 20th, 2010
12:39 pm
oops bad kids
kimmie
April 20th, 2010
12:39 pm
Its funny how people with no kids can always tell you the best way to raise kids..
While nothing beats first-hand experience, common-sense counts for something too. I never tell folks how to raise their kids because I don’t have any biologically of my own. But I have given my opinion on stuff when asked, like “if it were your child, what would you do?” or I’ll share something my mother/aunts/sister/daddy/etc said or did. But unsolicited advice – Never! I’ve had my opinion about some RANDOM kid get shot down, so I just keep my mouth shut!
Lady J-An intelligent person is never afraid or ashamed to find errors in his understanding of things....
April 20th, 2010
12:39 pm
pk a mess and it is DIRTY! YUCK!
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA MR. DAD D
April 20th, 2010
12:41 pm
Dreams M – You know that doesnt happen.. The Dads are treated totally fair in court. All Mothers tell the truth in court. The Dads are never forced out ot their childs life. The mother is always accountable for where the child support goes and its never used as adult support.. Oh And in the end its always the dudes fault.
mqew - GURU!!!?!!!! R.I.P!!!! - HIP HOP IS dead!
April 20th, 2010
12:42 pm
Sassy – Girl that mess is scarrry. I have a friend who will be 45 tomorrow and his fiance wants to have another child. He says he doesn’t mind, but I’m like DUDE. We need to go on a field trip to CC. You have a 20 year old and a 12 year old. Why in the hell you’d want to start over is BEYOND me!
PrincessNik
April 20th, 2010
12:43 pm
You have a 20 year old and a 12 year old. Why in the hell you’d want to start over is BEYOND me!
LOL, i have to agree with that
SexyCool (still fallin')
April 20th, 2010
12:44 pm
I will say this though – it was mentioned earlier about people who are not actively parenting the children that they have in the home….I see that a *lot*.
mqew - GURU!!!?!!!! R.I.P!!!! - HIP HOP IS dead!
April 20th, 2010
12:45 pm
There’s an Applebees by the CC in Conyers
I’ve been tempted!
Lady J-An intelligent person is never afraid or ashamed to find errors in his understanding of things....
April 20th, 2010
12:47 pm
never had the time or energy to be evil using my child….I have enough to pay for….that one wasn’t going to be it….
mqew - GURU!!!?!!!! R.I.P!!!! - HIP HOP IS dead!
April 20th, 2010
12:49 pm
SCool – That inactive on the weekend or every other weekend or every third Wed. or once a Monday mess just ain’t right. I’m speaking for the there all the time parent <——- Usually moms….. I know toooooo many. They have it hard….
THE INFAMOUS DK AKA MR. DAD D
April 20th, 2010
12:49 pm
Sessy – Reciprocity.. What you put in is what you get out.. I watched Monique last night well it was watching me.. And Shani the speed skater came on and he was saying that his mom would get off work and rush him across town to skate.. She did it for years. He’s from the southside of Chicago and is now the Gold medalist speed skater.. His mom put the extra effort in him that al kids need. I support my son in everything he does.. Im at PTAs, games, field trips or whatever.. I also sit down evey night he’s at my home and go over his homework if he has it.. Why because what Im putting in him now will last hi a lifetime..
PrincessNik
April 20th, 2010
12:50 pm
never had the time or energy to be evil using my child
me either,