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First date misadventures

A married friend of mine recently told me that I was lucky to be single and free to date around.  It made me chuckle a little because just days before, I had experienced a pretty awful dating misadventure.  It was just one of those dates where all signs pointed to “Stop. Do not past go. Go straight to hell no.”

The guy was attractive enough in the beginning, but the more he talked the less I wanted him to.  When he made a rude comment about single women worrying about the wrong ring, it was pretty much a wrap.  Apparently ladies, instead of chasing a wedding ring, we need to focus on the “ring of dirt” in our bathrooms.  

First date flops are pretty common when you are dating around.  When we discussed whether “first impressions are reliable” some of us believed that you can’t always go by snap judgments. What about when you talk, find out about one another, then go on a really awful bad date? Now what?  Do you risk a colossal waste of time on a second date?

Have you ever been on a really bad first date?  If your first impression during a first date is absolute incompatibility, would you think about delaying dismissal?

Are there ways we can improve our first date success rates?

436 comments Add your comment

SlimCoo-Coo

April 15th, 2010
11:45 am

“I wld have hooked u up for at least one first date with mystery blog man”

Melo – it’s one thing to go on a blind date…but a blind blog mystery man date??? :shock: So is it and send me a pic…you have the email addy lol

Melo

April 15th, 2010
11:46 am

Who dates more Slim or Wisa Diva?

@Elijah!

obviously WD..u wanna be her experiment??

Leggs

April 15th, 2010
11:47 am

All of those shoes are hideous!

Kym

April 15th, 2010
11:52 am

Afternoon All,

My friend from the other day ask the young guy from finance out and he said yes. I will let yall know how it goes.

In my own personal news..one of Melo’s fellow country men hit on me at the post office today.

Has anyone seen Truth lately..I miss our little political talks and I have some finance news to share with him.

Elijah ( Today is a good day!)

April 15th, 2010
11:52 am

Melo can you hook a brotha up?

Wisa Diva has more dates then Tiger’s has alleged mistresses?

Who is Jesse James? Why are the women outing this man?

Melo

April 15th, 2010
11:52 am

@Slim??

even tho im trying to broker a deal on the public blog,one thing about me, i keep secrets..u know married men keep secrets!

so u be safe..nobody will even know that the deal went thru! :lol:

but bizz is bizz..i gotta pocket my part(well,the goods??) of the deal be4 i talk or slip sme ur way!

I play Hardball(s)!??? :lol:

:lol: :lol:

Melo

April 15th, 2010
11:53 am

@Kym!

one of Melo’s fellow country men hit on me at the post office today.

are u giving him some play?? he impressive,so far??

plz lemme know!!

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

April 15th, 2010
11:54 am

@ Melo

re: “Can u believe,a thisrty woman can be intimidating too to a playa smetimes!?? ”

I definitely got one of those t-shirts once… but figured I had to “rise to the occasion” lasted two weekends…then I hid until she quit calling. Not proud of that actually.

SlimCoo-Coo

April 15th, 2010
11:56 am

melo – why do I get the strangest feeling that you are trying to become my pimp on the sly?

-even tho im trying to broker a deal
-nobody will even know that the deal went thru
-i gotta pocket my part(well,the goods

So what exactly would you be getting out of ‘the deal’? And who is this mystery blogger hiding behind curtain number 1? lol

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

April 15th, 2010
11:56 am

@Kym!

one of Melo’s fellow country men hit on me at the post office today.

How do you know it wasn’t the man himself?

Leggs

April 15th, 2010
11:58 am

“a thisrty woman can be intimidating too to a playa” How so??? How was she intimidating and still you “rose to the occasion?”

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

April 15th, 2010
11:59 am

Off topic…I can’t friggin believe this…supposed to fly to Paris tomorrow from Glasgow Scotland and all of the airports in the UK are closed because of a dayum volcano erupting in Iceland. Funny thing is the Iceland airport is open, but half the airports in western Europe are closed. Dayum, Dayum,Dayum,Dayum,Dayum,Dayum,Dayum,Dayum,Dayum,.

Professor

April 15th, 2010
12:00 pm

As for the shoes they are not my cup of tea, but I am sure there is a market for them. Some folks cannot give Christian Louboutin that kind of money, but still want some version of the premium designer market.

If I saw a lady out with them on I would not say trying too hard, because I see too many that don’t try hard enough. There are some model chicks out there that can pull some things off.

Lady J

April 15th, 2010
12:00 pm

slim you bout to get it crunk brought back a couple years ago when your comedy use to get us through!!!!! too funny!!!!!

Professor

April 15th, 2010
12:01 pm

RandyT I thought about you and your trip to Paris this morning when I saw the report.

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

April 15th, 2010
12:01 pm

@ Leggs…I didn’t want her to think I was from Midtown or Piedmont Park. Kept up my end so to speak, but her draggin me to the BR on the first date was new to me at the time (not long after my divorce)…and scary.

Raqi

April 15th, 2010
12:01 pm

LOL SexyCool. Those are awful. Maybe it’s a sad attempt to copy Christian Louboutin. He has a Total Madness collection that is a bit much for me.

Kym

April 15th, 2010
12:02 pm

@Melo.. He waited in the parking lot until I came out of the building(that creeps me out). He walked over to my car..(I was doing the quick–walk–run..) he told me I was beautiful..(I said thank you but in my head I was like..oh lord)..he asked for my number( I gave it to him..I will talk to you on the phone..that way I don’t have to waste mace or bullets)<<<<just kidding So Melo I don't know yet.

@RandyT..I don't think it was Melo..but if it was I should have used the Mace..LMAO!!

PrincessNik.....feelin the butterflies

April 15th, 2010
12:03 pm

I didn’t want her to think I was from Midtown or Piedmont Park

:lol:

Kym

April 15th, 2010
12:03 pm

Ok seriously the blog eats at least one of my post a day

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

April 15th, 2010
12:03 pm

@ Prof…hoping it will pass. Supposed to be sunny and warm all weekend ther and I am going to be so POed if I am stuck here in Cumbria with the gal with 14 teeth, instead of at the Tour de Eiffel checking out women from four or five continents.

Professor

April 15th, 2010
12:03 pm

one thing about me, i keep secrets..u know married men keep secrets!

:shock:

You are something else :grin:

Melo

April 15th, 2010
12:04 pm

How do you know it wasn’t the man himself?

@RandyT??

agggghhh…

no,it aint me!

SexyCool

April 15th, 2010
12:04 pm

VSB has been funny as sht this week.

Check ‘em out.

Professor

April 15th, 2010
12:06 pm

RandyT I am hoping it will pass as well, because the girl with no teeth is not a good consolation prize.

Kym

April 15th, 2010
12:07 pm

@Melo..he waited until I came out of the post office..(that creeps me out). Came over to my car(still creepy)..told me I was beautiful(I said thank you but in my head I was like oh lawd)..he asked for my number to call me and asked what was a good time..oh yeah and if I was married.(maybe with that steeler logo he thought I was)..anywhoo I figured what the heck. Phone yes..no wasted mace or bullets.

If it was Melo I would have used mace.

Lady J

April 15th, 2010
12:08 pm

scool that was interesting!!!!! LOL

Raqi

April 15th, 2010
12:09 pm

SexyCool, I checked Champ out this morning I just love that list. See that’s how real men think. They realize we are human beings. All this crap we read about how guys say they want women that looked like they stepped out of Glamour magazine the minute we step out of bed need to go somewhere and sit their tired arses down.

Real men want real women.

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

April 15th, 2010
12:10 pm

@ Prof

To be fair, she does have some teeth, just about half or so of normal…and those are a funny color.

Melo

April 15th, 2010
12:10 pm

So what exactly would you be getting out of ‘the deal’?

@SlimOne??

see,u dont have to tell the blog that..u just figure it out and lemme know how much u think the hook up is wrth…negotiable! :lol: But i dont hook up low priced targets,thats one thing fo sho!

@Elijah
Melo can you hook a brotha up?

yeah,but not WD and not Slim! these 2 might make u go the other way with angst once u get benched…

I dont want u to resign on ladies completely.

But u free to lemme know ur other targets and I will feel for u and give u my highly sought after evaluations! :lol:

SexyCool

April 15th, 2010
12:11 pm

Rock – that’s why *I* call him The Champ. LOL!

kimmie

April 15th, 2010
12:12 pm

Raqita – How was your trip?

kimmie

April 15th, 2010
12:15 pm

SCool – Those shoes were designed by Christian Siriano, winner of Project Runway a few seasons ago! That’s why they are high. Actually, I thought they were going to be uglier. They look like a few I’ve seen in the magazines on the runways this year.

There is a family of sisters I am friends with – 4 ladies. They all have tiny feet – (size 5 1/2 or 6). They can put on the ugliest shoes & somehow pull them off. I bet they would rock those!

SlimCoo-Coo

April 15th, 2010
12:16 pm

SexyCool – thanks for a good funny read during lunch. That was funny. LOL!

SexyCool

April 15th, 2010
12:16 pm

btw – Rock – that supercute pic of Lady Liz.

Raqi

April 15th, 2010
12:18 pm

SexyCool I am so glad I have a real man that knows how to appreciate this real woman burps, occasional leg stumble, past and all. A woman can’t ask for much more.

Raqi

April 15th, 2010
12:18 pm

Kimmie, it was really nice, just too short. LOL

SlimCoo-Coo

April 15th, 2010
12:19 pm

“i dont hook up low priced targets,thats one thing fo sho!”

melo – so if you put me into a market report…what would the going average rate be for a chick like me? LOL

And why did you post to Elijah regarding not WD or me remind me of the part in Color Purple when Danny Glover came trying to get Netti but the dad said he couldn’t have her…could only have Ceilie lololol

SexyCool

April 15th, 2010
12:19 pm

kimmie – I remember him from watching the show. Even on the show, it seemed like he was always trying to design the most avant garde (read: ugly) mess and convince us it was fashion.

He needs to stay away from the Ex pills and the lipgloss.

Kym

April 15th, 2010
12:19 pm

I love that blog Sexy..funny list..but true.

Melo

April 15th, 2010
12:20 pm

Kym!

hope it works out….I hope he got a back bone tho to handle u! :lol:

Raqi

April 15th, 2010
12:20 pm

They look like a few I’ve seen in the magazines on the runways this year.

Kimmie, when I see those runway pictures in magazine I kinda shudder. Who wears that stuff on the street? Even on the red carpet you don’t find those designs. I never understood it. But then I am not a designer or model either. LOL

Raqi

April 15th, 2010
12:21 pm

Thanks SexyCool. Cute shot, but nerve wrecking at the same time. LOL

kimmie

April 15th, 2010
12:24 pm

SCool – Yeah, that mess was ugly, but the kind of over-the-top stuff those high-fashion types go for!

Do you remember a blond guy that won awhile back, Austin Scott? He got a gig with Amsale, the sister that designs GORGEOUS, sophisticated wedding gowns. He was working with her for awhile & I think now he has his own line. I saw him on Say Yes to the Dress.

Kym

April 15th, 2010
12:24 pm

@Melo Ha..Ha.. whateva..joker..

Okay seriously it is taking the weekend wayyy to long to get here these days.

Melo

April 15th, 2010
12:26 pm

what would the going average rate be for a chick like me?

@Slim

u got a good rating,no worries. Ur print and pictorial reviews(thanx to facebook) came in sound!

@And why did you post to Elijah regarding not WD or me

as for him,one thing,he dont have his facebook profile on. If he truly is looking,he needs to kick the incognito look.So I cannot put a height qualification on his stats sheet coz his pic aint nowhere.
His blog persona also dont vibe with WD or urself. Ill just keep it at that(minimum) coz individual evaluations are secret…remember his other potential female suitors are listening..i aint giving them free inside info unless they play ball too.

Dont u luv to be in my position?!! :lol:

Leggs

April 15th, 2010
12:27 pm

I didn’t want her to think I was from Midtown or Piedmont Park. :lol: :lol: All those words just to say “sweet.” :lol: :lol:

If it was Melo I would have used mace. Comedy at it’s finest!!

kimmie

April 15th, 2010
12:28 pm

Raqi – I keep up with high fashion quite a bit. They have to design the over-the-top stuff for the runway shows. It’s more like art that real-woman fashion. Some of it would be too much for Lady Gaga! But what they really do is put on a “performance” for the shows, tone them WAY DOWN to sell in the boutiques in NYC, Paris, Milan, etc & some they tone down EVEN MORE to mass produce to sell in the Macy’s, Dillards, etc. By the time they reach Walmart, if they ever do, they are unrecognizable!LOL!!

SexyCool

April 15th, 2010
12:28 pm

“If I can’t trust you enough to stand in front of you, naked and vulnerable, imperfect and flawed, and have you love me in spite of, you are not my forever.”

CoolShadow

April 15th, 2010
12:29 pm

First dates are simply auditions to confirm whether you want to spend additional time and resources on future dates with someone. That’s why a first date should be a somewhat subdued encounter like a coffee shop, as opposed to a five-star restaurant where you might drop $100+ on a date with a person who may not have even reached acquaintance status.

I haven’t really had a date from hell experience, although there have a couple where I wish I could get that time spent back. Went on a first date with someone I had marginal interest in to a sporting event. In the middle of the event she asks if I’m ready to leave because the smoke was bothering her sinuses, but would endure it if I wanted to stay. The problem was that the venue was smoke free and I interpreted that move as her wanting to break off the date. We immediately left and I dropped her off at her place and never spoke to her since. I was more ticked off at the corny lie than the fact that she wanted to end the date early.