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First date misadventures

A married friend of mine recently told me that I was lucky to be single and free to date around.  It made me chuckle a little because just days before, I had experienced a pretty awful dating misadventure.  It was just one of those dates where all signs pointed to “Stop. Do not past go. Go straight to hell no.”

The guy was attractive enough in the beginning, but the more he talked the less I wanted him to.  When he made a rude comment about single women worrying about the wrong ring, it was pretty much a wrap.  Apparently ladies, instead of chasing a wedding ring, we need to focus on the “ring of dirt” in our bathrooms.  

First date flops are pretty common when you are dating around.  When we discussed whether “first impressions are reliable” some of us believed that you can’t always go by snap judgments. What about when you talk, find out about one another, then go on a really awful bad date? Now what?  Do you risk a colossal waste of time on a second date?

Have you ever been on a really bad first date?  If your first impression during a first date is absolute incompatibility, would you think about delaying dismissal?

Are there ways we can improve our first date success rates?

436 comments Add your comment

PrincessNik.....feelin the butterflies

April 15th, 2010
11:01 am

SEXY C

OMG Tennis skirts, yes, and we had to have K-swiss sneakers to rock with ours

SlimCoo-Coo

April 15th, 2010
11:02 am

Dreams & DK

I was checking out the website for Agatha’s and the tix are like $60 a pop. I’m not sure that cost is appropriate for a first date. That means an average cost of at LEAST $120 if you don’t order anything extra. Not sure i’d be comfy with that amount of cash flow for a 1st time. What do yall think about that?

DreamsMaterialize

April 15th, 2010
11:02 am

Slim – Dang you done scooped the tax man.. Hey hold up… Let me meet ya so you can dig this..
Yeah Slim got some game I see. The Mr. IRS, Mr. Car Sales, Mr. Que Dawg, Mr. Ricky Ricardo, Mr. Share No Feelings. Slim don’t lie, you ain’t paid for a meal in like the last two months, huh. lol Hustlin’, staying recession proof.

Lady J-Lioness

April 15th, 2010
11:02 am

girl the waves bring back high school memories lol

Professor

April 15th, 2010
11:03 am

Leggs and DreamsM Meet me over there…my treat, because now I want one too!

Elijah are you out here flirting with these heifers via haircut? lol

Dang Slim you know how to pull ‘em girl…you pulled the car man too! Keep your game strong this is the time of year to do it

PrincessNik.....feelin the butterflies

April 15th, 2010
11:03 am

Slim that $120 is kinda steep for a FIRST date, save that for somebody you really feeling.

Lady J-Lioness

April 15th, 2010
11:03 am

professor too damn funny!

PrincessNik.....feelin the butterflies

April 15th, 2010
11:05 am

Lady J i can remember applying murray’s to my ex’s hair and being taught to brush with the wave not against the wave :lol: lmbo

Lady J-Lioness

April 15th, 2010
11:05 am

best first date bookstore read a book talk a bit back and forth and enjoyed silence……priceless oh and a hug! lol

SexyCool

April 15th, 2010
11:06 am

PK – we wore dopeboy Nikes with ours.

Lady J-Lioness

April 15th, 2010
11:06 am

pk memory lane chica! the wave cap as he walked off the football field! #POW! LOL those were the days!

DreamsMaterialize

April 15th, 2010
11:07 am

Not sure i’d be comfy with that amount of cash flow for a 1st time. What do yall think about that?
Ask Mr. Tax if there’s any way I can claim that $120 as a deduction and we’re on and poppin. lol

Lady J-Lioness

April 15th, 2010
11:08 am

Melo

April 15th, 2010
11:09 am

I took a lady once on a first date..eghh back then..we go to the theatre to watch some play and jazz thang..cool,we talking,vibing etc..but then,rather be conseravtive with me and just have fun,babe girl starts strokking the back of my head and neck..just trying to pull me up on high!
:lol:
And I was even thinking of her or looking at her as a jump off or in those terms,not immediately like that, but more like a serious girl thang i wanted to explore a relationship with.
Now,I truly hate it when phat sheep and goats willingly walk into the lions den..thirsty look?? u gotta disguise them looks and ur little fingers,jus a lil bit.

I knew she was feeling itchy down there and i was mad that my scouting report was kinda off. I wasnt hungry at that point.

I sqeezed her hard when we parted and dismissed her and then declined to answer her constant and frequent calls subsequent to that encounter!

Can u believe,a thisrty woman can be intimidating too to a playa smetimes!?? :lol:

Timeless

April 15th, 2010
11:10 am

Pirate Joe (@9:16) – Totally agree. Far too many people just want to have meaningless fun. There are ways to have mature, interesting fun without acting like one is in high school.

PrincessNik.....feelin the butterflies

April 15th, 2010
11:10 am

dopeboy Nikes

Sexy C, not sure what those are, we prolly called em something else.

Melo

April 15th, 2010
11:10 am

I wasnt event thinking!! (corectn)

SexyCool

April 15th, 2010
11:11 am

I was reading the Essence magazine with Jill Scott on the cover yesterday while I was in Firestone getting new tires.

I ran across a Payless Shoe Source ad that had some ugly ass shoes for $80.

$80 shoes in PAYLESS?!?!? WHATDAHELL?!?!?!?

Melo

April 15th, 2010
11:11 am

aggghhhhh..

neva mind!

PrincessNik.....feelin the butterflies

April 15th, 2010
11:12 am

$80 shoes in PAYLESS?!?!? WHATDAHELL?!?!?!?

i saw that also tsk tsk tsk

Professor

April 15th, 2010
11:15 am

@Lady J… :grin: as tired as I am I cannot help but to laugh.

DreamsM are you going to bring some spirits for Leggs and I to spike these Italian ice treats? You are the bartender, right.

Rico

April 15th, 2010
11:15 am

First date was a blind date. Friend set me up with a beautiful (and I mean bee-YOO-tee-full) young lady for a double date. Dinner and movie. One thing he “forgot” to mention was that she was an ORDAINED MINISTER! (Found out on the way to pick her up via text msg.) Although nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs, I followed through. My error was assuming she was somehow less than human due to her profession. This gal has a wonderful (if just a bit conservative) personality, sipped wine with class and grace, and laid a goodnight kiss (kiss ONLY) on me that would have melted steel! My lady reverend and I are still together and going strong. No intimacy of course, but that is fine with me. I fully respect her vows and moral obligation to her ministry. She is such a wonderful person that I am honored to be with her without all the usual trappings. Marriage in the future? Maybe, but we are still getting to know one another and simply enjoying each others company. Moral of the story: DON’T judge the book by its cover!
By the way, she didn’t do that to me . . .I’m just a “working stiff IT guy” and she accepts that without hesitation.

Lady J-Lioness

April 15th, 2010
11:15 am

yall I have yet to open the magazine….lol I read my horoscope and that is it….I have to do better with Essence!

SlimCoo-Coo

April 15th, 2010
11:15 am

“Slim don’t lie, you ain’t paid for a meal in like the last two months, huh. lol Hustlin’, staying recession proof.”

Dreams LMAO @ your dating recap for me. ha ha ha But for real though, it’s not like that. I’m not out searching for sponsors to stay recession proof. Some of those dudes you listed didn’t make it to an actual date. You can scratch Ricky Ricardo off…when we met up at Uptown, I paid my own way. Never went out with Mr. Carsalesman even though i have to stop by there today to pick up my manual for the car ;-) Mr. Que still around and so is Mr. Feeling Fighter. And as far as game, I don’t have any..I’m just Me :-D

Lady J-Lioness

April 15th, 2010
11:17 am

awwww rico congrats!!!! never judge a book by its covers!!!! That is a cute story!

DreamsMaterialize

April 15th, 2010
11:18 am

Awwww not the haircuts. Gotta say the girls used to love the shag and the tail. haha later on the christopher williams box cut was the MO. Rocked the suge knight baldy with the beard a little while in college. baldy with the goatee at other times. Went hard in Cali and grew my hair out and rocked the Samoan style ponytail. rocked the curls (not the Jherri) for a while too. throughout it all, the tight fade has always been there though. I almost always revert back to that.

SlimCoo-Coo

April 15th, 2010
11:18 am

PrincessNik – um that wouldn’t be coming out of my pocket. LOL! I would if that was for someone I was dating for a while like you said. But I wouldn’t be comfy with someone else spending that on a 1st date on me…not my MO to get a dude to ball out for me when we haven’t even decided if we like each other…

PrincessNik.....feelin the butterflies

April 15th, 2010
11:19 am

Slim,

I didn’t mean YOU lol i meant you in general ;)

Raqi

April 15th, 2010
11:21 am

$80 shoes in PAYLESS?!?!? WHATDAHELL?!?!?!?

Maybe they are $240 anywhere else or a replica of a more expensive brand. You know for those who want the designer look for the warehouse prices.

Leggs

April 15th, 2010
11:23 am

@BD of the South ~ the blog is routinely hijacked for various reasons, and it’s not always bored office ladies. Sometimes it’s horny men that do the hijacking! Which category do you fit in?

SexyCool

April 15th, 2010
11:23 am

Girl, regardless – they were ugly.
Let me see if I can find a link and post them.

Lady J-Lioness

April 15th, 2010
11:23 am

preach leggs! lol

DreamsMaterialize

April 15th, 2010
11:27 am

And as far as game, I don’t have any..I’m just Me
Ahhhhh the old “No-Game” Game. ;-) Hey, enjoy yourself and keep the bar high, so that even the ones you reject can at least say they know what quality looks like. Now, when you’ve scratched them all off the list, come holla at me. lol

Melo

April 15th, 2010
11:29 am

I’m not out searching for sponsors to stay recession proof

@SlimOne??

If u hadnt chickened out on fulfilling my end of the unsinged hooking-u-up contract(the in-kind,dollar less commission),I wld have hooked u up for at least one first date with mystery blog man,possibly dinner at some swanky Atl eatery!

:lol: :lol:

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

April 15th, 2010
11:30 am

Not too many “bad” dates fortunately. The worst have been “blind dates” set up by so-called friends…how did they think I would be attracted to some of them I’ll never know. I do my best to avoid “blind dates” like the plague.

There have been a few where I did not excite and impress someone I wanted to impress. These were followed by those “what the h… was I thinkin” moments afterwards when I wanted to slap my self in the side of the head and tell myself had badly I had screwed the pooch..

SexyCool

April 15th, 2010
11:32 am

The Payless Shoes

The second set of pictures. Uuuummmm….Hell naw.

SexyCool

April 15th, 2010
11:34 am

PrincessNik.....feelin the butterflies

April 15th, 2010
11:34 am

SEXY C

just FUGLY

Lady J-Lioness

April 15th, 2010
11:34 am

aww shucks look @ payless stepping it up…lol

Lady J-Lioness

April 15th, 2010
11:35 am

pk too funny! pk watch this I guess show show is the new payless! did i take you back to SC LOL

SexyCool

April 15th, 2010
11:36 am

I would see a chick with those shoes on and immediately file her ass under *Trying Too Hard*.

Willie Dynamite

April 15th, 2010
11:38 am

Morning All,

Fortunately no Bad First dates for me. I’ve never really been on a blind date so I’m pretty good with the due diligence (scouting report). I also think it helps with at least having a few good conversations upfront. I can say I had a few misunderstanding about expectations. I refer to them as Chickenheads now for expecting the Big Dinner and movie nite out before I even found out anything about them. How bout we just have a drink or even take a walk and talk a little.

PrincessNik.....feelin the butterflies

April 15th, 2010
11:39 am

Lady J, you right shoe show, of course now they are all over.

PrincessNik.....feelin the butterflies

April 15th, 2010
11:40 am

aww shucks

lady J NOOOO!

Lady J

April 15th, 2010
11:41 am

sexycool too funny!

Lady J

April 15th, 2010
11:41 am

I am being funny yall! LOL

Lady J

April 15th, 2010
11:41 am

marshall’s is my shop stop for less!

Elijah ( Today is a good day!)

April 15th, 2010
11:41 am

Yes Professor I am attracting all kind of hiefers with the fresh cut! :smile:

Who dates more Slim or Wisa Diva?

Lady J

April 15th, 2010
11:43 am

good conversation is key…..doesn’t require the fluff of doing anything major or costly…..

PrincessNik.....feelin the butterflies

April 15th, 2010
11:45 am

good conversation is key…..doesn’t require the fluff of doing anything major or costly…..

very true