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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Nice girls finish last too?

We hear all the time that nice guys finish last, but does the same ring true for super nice girls? Do they get glanced over as well?  Yes, super nice girls are out there, men.

I find it so fascinating (and by fascinating, I mean annoying) when I am super nice to some guys, they try to take my kindness for weakness.  Then I have to show the feisty side when I am challenged.When this happens, why does this often turn the guy on more? Is it because he’s lame and should be left alone?

I don’t like acting like a witch, but I always learn a lot about a guy when I’m in one of those modes.  It’s not about that “cute when you’re mad” excuse, either.  Challenging women attract a particular type of man. The question is, would I want that kind of man for my own?

Do you think that when you date someone new, you go through a phase where you are seeing what kind of boundaries the person has?

Is it true that nice girls finish last? How do men interpret a nice girl’s behavior? Do they test her to see how nice she really is?

Ladies, do you find that being nice on the dating scene works best for you? Do you think being harsh with men is a defense tool women use as emotional protection?  Does that actually work?

Do nice girls finish last?

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448 comments Add your comment

mqew

April 13th, 2010
1:18 pm

Melo – Nice list, but that chick sounds perfect….. as in NOT real.

SexyCool

April 13th, 2010
1:19 pm

Yeah – that tithing thing knocked me off Melo’s list.

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:20 pm

mqew, which item on the list is not real or perfect in nature? :)

BlackMagicWoman

April 13th, 2010
1:21 pm

I knew of Sylvester because house music was very big in NY & NJ and he was very much known on that scene. Might Real was his biggest hit! He was the Original Boy George…just Brown! :lol:
Poor thing died of that Monster.

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:21 pm

SexyCool, you are stealing from the tithes plate when it is being passed around? LOL

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 13th, 2010
1:22 pm

I didn’t know the last guy though…Sylvester.

Me either…I did get to watch a snippet of that episode and realized that his back up singers were The Weather Girls but he called them another name I didn’ like.

lito if you and Julia go the the festival is she gonna let you partake of any veggies?

Luvbug

April 13th, 2010
1:22 pm

Melo – Well there it is…a comprehensive list (for some female). You know my statement wasn’t gender specific, so I’m due the other half sir. :lol:

Mo (aka Moeisha - I HATE pollen)

April 13th, 2010
1:22 pm

mqew – I had heard of Sylvester but didnt know much about ’shim’ either. I did see one video by ’shim’ on Centric recently and I watched only b/c it looked old but I was like “is that REALLY a dude dressed as a man and a woman in the same video??” :shock:

Mo (aka Moeisha - I HATE pollen)

April 13th, 2010
1:24 pm

Sassy – Two Tons of Fun aka The Weather Girls…..how can you be cool with that name?!?!?!

SexyCool

April 13th, 2010
1:25 pm

LMAO!
Not stealing.
I just don’t tithe.

Willie Dynamite

April 13th, 2010
1:25 pm

Sassy/Lito – That festival is definitely less about the partaking of Veggies and moreso all about the Brew.

abc

April 13th, 2010
1:25 pm

Along with Melo’s list, as impossible as it may seem to fulfill: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Proverbs%2031&version=MSG

abc

April 13th, 2010
1:26 pm

…starting in verse 10.

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:26 pm

I saw this woman slap a man in front of the Fox Grill Saturday night. She hit him once he grabbed her hand, she slapped him with the other one. He started to walk away, she then called him a “b**** made” something That did it. He started walking back towards her and flexed up and she just fell to the ground. He did not even touch her, I guess she was expecting the hit. I am sure that she was not nice, being that she hit him first. LOL

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:28 pm

abc, we DO NOT TALK about the Bible here.

J/K because I got slammed by someone for doing something like that on here. LOL

Lady J-you can’t experiEnce success without failure!!!!!

April 13th, 2010
1:28 pm

Kym

April 13th, 2010
1:31 pm

Alright Bloggers I need advice and opinion on a problem that has been presented to me. One of my sisterfriends has a problem and I need the advice of the gentlemen..ladies chime in as well..Alright here we go…

So there is a young fellow working in her office.(He is in finance, she is in IT so no conflict)..the two have been flirting back and forth for about 4 months, flirting as in laughing sharing jokes. While they work in different areas he always finds a reason to stop by and see her share convo. Now this young fellow has asked her out but she is not big on next day dates so she told him she was busy that day. So today frustration on her part has come to the boiling point. Today on one of his daily visits she smiles laughs and mentions that she is going out for lunch. He says really where you going, she says I am thinking a sandwich, he says cool I got to go out today too. And then Nothing. She was hoping he would catch a hint and ask her if he can join her..but nothing. Her side is that if you are not interesting stop coming by and chatting her up two or three times a day. I told her maybe he wants her to ask him..but I yield this case study to my fellow bloggers..what should she do..Ask him, wait for him to get a clue..or is there a door number three?

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:32 pm

Sassy, from my research there will be no partaking “there” but there are a few spots that there will be. She and I have reached a compromise. If she is actually pregnant I will stop. Otherwise I have to confine it to one room in the house. This is my house but in the 5 days she has been here she has made it hers. LOL I do not mind. My brother is leaving thursday, Julia is leaving sunday. I am going to get her to try it before she leaves. I will just make her a bet that she will lose or something. :)

SexyCool

April 13th, 2010
1:33 pm

Ah..the Proverbs 31 Woman – whatever happened to that *movement*?

I remember when all the *saved* chicks were running around talking about being a Proverbs 31 Woman. What happened? Did she go out of style?

Notice how Proverbs 31 doesn’t mention tithing?

(Entire post is tongue-in-cheek.)

Leggs

April 13th, 2010
1:33 pm

Sylvester was before his time.

@BMW ~ you got it. Love house music to this day.

Melo

April 13th, 2010
1:34 pm

Nice list, but that chick sounds perfect….. as in NOT real.

@Mqew…i wld say the ten commandments are a perfect if not an ideal, go by-list for any one..man or woman.

@Luvbug??

u asked the qstion and i gave u the ideal answer or some close to it. U wre very gender specific..”nice girl!!”

U tell me/us what wld be an ideal nice guy to u??

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 13th, 2010
1:34 pm

That festival is definitely less about the partaking of Veggies and moreso all about the Brew.

I kinda got that impression when I read it….actually there’s a slew of festivals this weekend as well as the alleged Freaknic poppin off….should be nice.

Two Tons of Fun aka The Weather Girls…..how can you be cool with that name?!?!?!

For real right Mo?! When I heard that I cringed a little but regardless them women can sang.

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:35 pm

Kym, maybe it is due to the workplace? If she wants to go just ask him and go from there.

SexyCool

April 13th, 2010
1:36 pm

Kym – she has already turned his ass down once. I’m sure he’s not getting set up to be turned down again.

And she turned him down for a *next day* date, but wants him to go to lunch with her *same* day?

Sounds like your friend could be a little bit more spontaneous. Better to have a *next day* date than to be sitting at the house by yourdamnself the next night.

Lady J-you can’t experiEnce success without failure!!!!!

April 13th, 2010
1:36 pm

sexycool you have me laughing out loud!!!!!!

SexyCool

April 13th, 2010
1:37 pm

Oh…and if she wanted him to go to lunch with her….she should have just asked him.

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:40 pm

Games, don’t play them. If she wants to go ask him. A guy can only be told no so many times before he is stopping at the next office over.

Sassy, did the security guy bother you anymore?

Kym

April 13th, 2010
1:40 pm

@Sexy my recommendation was for her to ask him.

Melo_Luv Doctor

April 13th, 2010
1:41 pm

dates so she told him she was busy that day

@Kym!

that above was the first “mistake” the young lady made,if she was interested but busy that day.

Sjhe shld have left the door wide ajar..like saying,’oh,not today coz im ..but how about……blah blah?”

that wld have been a wrap!

(lesson for other ladies)

Coz if u dont do that,u make it harder for guys to read u(ur min d) and we get crushed when we are rejected,so we do hesitate smetimes! :lol:

She needs to continue being friendly as be4 and hopefully,dude is still interested.But she has to wait more coz right now,he may be re-thinking his plan…

Personally, i dont advocate a chic asking him out…Its a risky move..Nice chics dont do aggresive moves! (lol)

Clearly dude was interestted..no qstion,coz he asked!

Luv Doc closes prescription book! :lol:

abc

April 13th, 2010
1:41 pm

Tithing is required by The Law, an Old Testament object, and specific to Jews. Christians, not bound to Old Testament Law, but rather described by the New Testament, are not bound to the tithe, but to giving such that one party is not excessively burdened compared to another, and to cheerful giving, ergo with a glad heart. Persistence of Churches in specifying the tithe is a fund raising tactic, motivated by the bloated semi-Christian entities that so many churches have become.

Why, if the church has a monthly operating expense of $15-20 mil, like some of the local mega-churches, it’s not that big a surprise that they’d perpetrate such a mis-reading of the Bible. Hypocrites.

Elijah ( Today is a good day!)

April 13th, 2010
1:42 pm

Good Afternoon blogging superstars!

I luv ladies who know how to carry themselves in a respectful manner! That is a good lady to me! think we sometimes take words and let it become the total description of a person. I will not date dramatic unneccessary loud women! I luv to have fun but foolery will not be tolerated!

BMW you need to put on your discernment cap before you take a dip in the men pool! The signs are their you choose to ignore them because he was a smooth talker and good looking!

Leggs you have some really funny stories. Just make sure the dude is in good health and if you progress to the level of headbanging sex just enjoy the ride! :smile:

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:42 pm

Kym, good advise to your friend that you gave her. Stuff does not have to be complicated. Please tell me if he says no though. :)

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 13th, 2010
1:43 pm

I am going to get her to try it before she leaves.

Try WHAT?! Lito I have a rule when it comes to “turning people on to something new”…especially that…..DON’T DO IT. However if you do decide to try it there must be an understanding that she can only do it with YOU…that way it’ll be y’alls little secret.

but I yield this case study to my fellow bloggers..what should she do..Ask him, wait for him to get a clue..or is there a door number three?

Kym how old is this guy?…wait you did say “young fellow” in your post….maybe that’s just it. He doesn’t know how to approach her…it’s clear he likes her but you know sometimes men just don’t get it when we’re trying to be subtle….sumtimes you just gotta whack ‘em over the head with it.

Kym

April 13th, 2010
1:45 pm

@Abc dang it let me get my suggestions for my friend’s dating woes before you open up this can on tithing. You know we can go all day on church stuff in here. Now the Rev is going to come out of lurksville to get you.

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:45 pm

If you do not tithe financially you can tithe your time or anything that benefits the “house”. If God opened the church he will provide a way for it to stay open whether the congregation tithes or not. I love preachers who state that and do not ask for tithes. Plus your tithe means nothing if you are not doing it with a cheerful heart.

Let the mass say “Amen”

Ok time for confessional. LOL

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA MR. MY SINUSES ARE..

April 13th, 2010
1:46 pm

Kym – Tell that chick to lose the “Chilli” list.. what the heezy? She dont like next day dates she likes today dates??!! Give me her number cause she might be freaking on the first date too.. That ish sounds foolish on soo many levels.. At this point if she already turned me down then Im not asking anymore.. If she wants me to pursue she has to act like she wants to be pursued.. Im not chasing just to chase and play that game with her.. I have SDADD Short Dating Attention Deficit Disorder. She better come on in or Im gonna color her gone..

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:47 pm

Sassy, she will not do it. I know she won’t besides then I would have to share. :) She did not put in on this.

DreamsMaterialize

April 13th, 2010
1:47 pm

Kym – she has already turned his ass down once. I’m sure he’s not getting set up to be turned down again.

And she turned him down for a *next day* date, but wants him to go to lunch with her *same* day?

Sounds like your friend could be a little bit more spontaneous. Better to have a *next day* date than to be sitting at the house by yourdamnself the next night.
SexyCool sorry for stealing your post, but it’s almost verbatim what I had in mind. lol

Kym

April 13th, 2010
1:47 pm

Alright so that’s three ask him, one nice girls don’t act aggressively, and one for wacking him on the head.

SexyCool

April 13th, 2010
1:47 pm

abc – that’s about where I am with it. What I do give and can give, I do so gladly – whether it is to church, to charity, to friends, to family, to a stranger on the street.

And for those who believe that you cannot afford NOT to tithe – no, I know my budget and I cannot afford TO tithe.

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:48 pm

Some people just make you scratch your head.

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 13th, 2010
1:49 pm

Sassy, did the security guy bother you anymore?

Carlito get out of my head!!!

This dude has emailed me twice today and I’ve yet to respond to any. WTF is dude thinking?….or is he even. Last week, on my way from the gym we walked past each other and he said NOTHING. If he really wanted to talk to me that was the right time b/c we were face to face but he said nada but will email me instead…..that’s really MOIST of him and SassaFrass don’t do moist men. I despise a weak man…if you want to know me, step to me, if not shyt kick rocks.

Mo (aka Moeisha - I HATE pollen)

April 13th, 2010
1:50 pm

Carlito – AMEN on the 1:45

SlimCoo-Coo

April 13th, 2010
1:50 pm

Single chicks talk about not being able to meet men yet when one asks them out, they refuse because they don’t like same-day dates?….tomorrow isn’t promised.

Kym

April 13th, 2010
1:51 pm

@DK ..lord..I am actually at a loss for words after your post..

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:51 pm

Nice girls do not act aggressive? Who said that? A nice girl claims what is her’s and maintains it. Bad girls switch it up. LOL

Sexy Cool does three words. I am going to start my own one word.

One word of the moment: “astro”

SexyCool

April 13th, 2010
1:53 pm

Leggs – what ever happened with your friend that was dating the coach?

Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)

April 13th, 2010
1:54 pm

Soo off topic: Anybody seen Vivica’s latest boy toy?…

Carlito

April 13th, 2010
1:54 pm

Mo, :) , I mean if your church is facing forclosure or the bills are not being paid. I do not think that God co-signed that loan. His credit is good from what I know. LOL You might need to check the churches loan documents.

Yes I am 420 friendly at the moment.

DreamsMaterialize

April 13th, 2010
1:54 pm

it’s not that big a surprise that they’d perpetrate such a mis-reading of the Bible. Hypocrites.
Lots of misreadings being perpetrated these days. The preachers are guilty for perpetrating things they KNOW aren’t true. The members are guilty for blindly following and not finding the truth on their own.