What just happened?
It is so perplexing when men are attracted to you one minute and the next they act all weird and distant. I can understand when someone doesn’t want to pursue things. I get confused when they come on so strong and then start to backpedal. Are women guilty of doing the same thing to men?
I’m usually not the type to come on too strong because I have that cautious nature that puts the brakes on. Even when I feel like I am plunging into the “new man” haze head first, I remain cautiously optimistic until things start to progress. Sometimes there is a shift in attraction. You figure out that the person who once made an impression on you really isn’t that compatible with you after all. What is your next move?
What are ways you can tell you are attracted to someone? Let’s go beyond the obvious, “I want to see them naked” barometer to test how strong your attraction is; how can you determine that your attraction is significant enough to compel you to focus on just them?
How do you handle it when you are attracted to someone unexpectedly? Just because it catches you off guard, does that mean you won’t pursue things?
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658 comments Add your comment
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
1:54 pm
Melo….
So your wife is not both to you?
No, tight means she has moral values, and values herself….is just my take on any male or female pegged as “tight”.
Dan
March 30th, 2010
1:54 pm
@lurker
The fact that he’s (Zach) a Kappa (from an HBCU), and Common went to FAMU would lead me to believe that there was some understanding of lines to cross and not to.
LL411... Smiling On The Inside Too!
March 30th, 2010
1:55 pm
@ Melo I take that to mean the divorce was initiated by ur ex??
No, I initiated the divorce after almost 20 years. And no, there wasn’t any cheating going on that I’m aware of… I just didn’t want them in existence, my world or his.
Raqi
March 30th, 2010
1:57 pm
Cemeeli, now you know they aren’t going to answer that
truthfully. LOLCarlito
March 30th, 2010
1:57 pm
I have lied to some women who have sent me nudey pics. They ask me if I deleted them and without a pause I say “yes”. I dont have to many but I do have some nice ones.
Melo
March 30th, 2010
1:59 pm
Do men like their woman with a tight body, or a woman with good old fashion values?
@Cee??
i aint following??
did i answer u tho?
tight body=fierce,phine?
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
1:59 pm
Heeey Raqi!
DreamsMaterialize
March 30th, 2010
2:00 pm
Cemeeli, now you know they aren’t going to answer that truthfully.
The truth is that everyone (men and women) wants both.
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
2:01 pm
@ Melo – Yes. I got onto what’s more solid about this “tight” you were getting at.
Tight body = physical attributes.
Tight = has all that said person is looking for in “the one”.
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:02 pm
Raqi, how are you little sis.
Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)
March 30th, 2010
2:02 pm
Would any of you make a sex tape with your current (not husband)?
NO! I make it a rule to never leave any hard evidence behind…other than a mark or two
… but those go away.
Raqi
March 30th, 2010
2:03 pm
Has anyone heard of this place? http://www.sccasa.com/
My sister is planning a family reunion for our family this year and she is looking into this place. It seems pretty neat. One of the places has 10 bedrooms. That way we all can stay in one place right on the ocean.
Tazzee - 46 days til Mrs.
March 30th, 2010
2:03 pm
Carlito – LOL, that’s one of my favorite movies. Every now and then I might get on one knee, throw up my hands and yell SUPERSTAR!!!
THE INFAMOUS DK
March 30th, 2010
2:04 pm
Melo – I didnt know me saying my Ex was a bad babe as a bad thing. Im not tripping on her just stating the facts. We werent right for each other and it showed later on which lead us to a divorce.. Now had we been right for each other we would still be togehter.. The only thing good from our marriage is my son so I have to love her for that cause I could never hate her more than I love my son.. Meaning if I hate her I gotta hate him because he loves her and he loves me and its not fair to put him in that awkward situation..
ARED – Give me a sec Im cutting my Dads hair..
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:04 pm
Tazzee, do you smell your armpits also?
That is a very funny movie LOL
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:06 pm
Infamous, that is very real and commendable. I know you don’t need to hear that, but it is.
Raqi
March 30th, 2010
2:06 pm
Carlito, grazie molto bene. E tu?
THE INFAMOUS DK
March 30th, 2010
2:06 pm
Melo – It just dawned on me.. Bad meaning Fine, cute, sexy or gorgeous..
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:09 pm
Raqi, Sto facendo molto bene,tipo di noia. Sono tornato a casa inizio oggi
Raqi
March 30th, 2010
2:11 pm
Cemeeli, in terms of what I have, I married both. However, there is a big however, I like my man to be on the slender side. Not skinny but nicely toned and slender. More basketball build than football. Now there are plenty women that would not consider my husband former build to be “tight” but I love it.
Now he is about 20+ heavier than we married but it’s all good. One reason being I was already madly in love with him by the time he gained the weight. LOL In fact he says I put the weight on him.
And “B” he wears it well so I ain’t complaining.
Melo
March 30th, 2010
2:11 pm
@DK…its all good
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
2:11 pm
that is very real and commendable. I know you don’t need to hear that, but it is.
Are you cryin Enrique?…
He’s been sharing some bonding times about his pops on here for a while.
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
2:14 pm
hmmmph…i feel in love with my old man’s heart – on the real.
I mean he fine and all, but i wun lookin’ you know.
Raqi
March 30th, 2010
2:14 pm
Carlito, I feel like going home myself. I have been kinda nauseous all morning.
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:14 pm
Can I ask a question and I do not want anyone to take it out of context. But I had chitterlings once in South Carolina. And I have been trying to find some, all I am being told is that you do not eat everyone’s chitterlings. Where can I find some good ones?
Melo
March 30th, 2010
2:14 pm
Now there are However, there is a big however, I like my man to be on the slender side.
@Raqi??
I will remember that when we talk about settling!
another day…….
Raqi
March 30th, 2010
2:15 pm
And a little sleepy.
Raqi
March 30th, 2010
2:17 pm
Cemeeli, that is sooooo true. You know before we got together it was what he was saying that captivated my heart. Had me thinking about him all night. But you know when I went to sleep then that physical thang starting acting up on me.
Tazzee - 46 days til Mrs.
March 30th, 2010
2:17 pm
Carlito –
naw, I don’t smell my armpits – I gotta pull that movie out.
Cemeeli – Hey Lady!!!
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:18 pm
Cemeeli, Enrique is latin, Enrico is Italian
Raqi, un altro bambino? LOL
Raqi
March 30th, 2010
2:19 pm
And like I said earlier to Infamous, I noted his manness before anything. He was a good man first from what I could see. Then he proved to be a tried and true friend. Next a great lover. And now the most amazing husband I could have ever imagined or asked for.
Dan
March 30th, 2010
2:19 pm
@Carlito
That’s what I’m thinking
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:20 pm
Tazzee, SNIFF!!!
I bought some and I tried to google how to cook them, they were gross.
Raqi
March 30th, 2010
2:20 pm
Carlito. LOL Stop.
Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)
March 30th, 2010
2:21 pm
un altro bambino?
I wondered that from the “nauseous all morning” part….
SexyCool
March 30th, 2010
2:21 pm
“I tried to google how to cook them, they were gross.”
My laugh of the day – Thank you.
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:22 pm
Dan, ess’s possible quando lei sesso come un coniglio.
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
2:22 pm
@…Enrico of Enrique….I’m just giving you a lil info about brother.
Don’t sass me on this blog! We out number you dude…”chittlins’” is how it’s spelled…and until you get the spelling right, we ain’t tellin.
Hi Tazzee.
Tazzee - 46 days til Mrs.
March 30th, 2010
2:24 pm
Raqi – nauseous? I know it’s something you ate and not something you ‘took in’ – Never been to Casas but it looks like a great place for a family vacation. Big enough to take the kids…
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:24 pm
Raqi, okay
lol
SexyCool, my whole house was funky. Can you help me find some though?
Raqi
March 30th, 2010
2:24 pm
However, as Infamous stated there are more than likely a few women that would like to see him dead. LOL
He doesn’t pretend to be a saint. He has told me before that he has done dirt in his lifetime.
Raqi
March 30th, 2010
2:25 pm
Sassy, yall better stop.
THE INFAMOUS DK
March 30th, 2010
2:25 pm
Cee – Good old fashion values cause as my Grandma says.. Beauty Fades..
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:25 pm
Cemeeli, “chittilins”. LOL okay now hook me up.
Oh and this is the end of week two with NO VEGGIES.
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
2:25 pm
chitterlings??? <— what are those?
Yeah those were prolly nasty….
Tazzee - 46 days til Mrs.
March 30th, 2010
2:26 pm
Carlito –
googling chitterlings, um excuse me “chitlins” – I don’t mess around with those. Word on the street is, I used to love them – until my Grandma made me clean them.
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
2:26 pm
@ Infamous – I thought so…..i’m just entertaining the lurking masses…
I roll slow over here…
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:27 pm
Dirt, nope not me. Carl maybe but not Carlito.
SexyCool
March 30th, 2010
2:28 pm
Carlito – Can’t help you.
I don’t eat ‘em. I’ve seen pigs slaughtered and the intestines removed and forced to clean them as a child.
I think they are the one of the most vile, disgusting things you could ever put in your mouth. (Especially if they were not cleaned properly.)
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
2:28 pm
Are they some African American secret? Why isn’t anyone telling me? LOL