What just happened?
It is so perplexing when men are attracted to you one minute and the next they act all weird and distant. I can understand when someone doesn’t want to pursue things. I get confused when they come on so strong and then start to backpedal. Are women guilty of doing the same thing to men?
I’m usually not the type to come on too strong because I have that cautious nature that puts the brakes on. Even when I feel like I am plunging into the “new man” haze head first, I remain cautiously optimistic until things start to progress. Sometimes there is a shift in attraction. You figure out that the person who once made an impression on you really isn’t that compatible with you after all. What is your next move?
What are ways you can tell you are attracted to someone? Let’s go beyond the obvious, “I want to see them naked” barometer to test how strong your attraction is; how can you determine that your attraction is significant enough to compel you to focus on just them?
How do you handle it when you are attracted to someone unexpectedly? Just because it catches you off guard, does that mean you won’t pursue things?
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658 comments Add your comment
Dan
March 30th, 2010
10:46 am
Faith and religion are two different things.
When was the last time someone professed their faith beyond a casual mention.
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
10:50 am
Cemeeli, NO!
I dated a woman for about 3 dates. No physical contact at all besides a hug after dinner or the movie. We would always meet at our destination. Well I called her a few times afterward and no response. So I wrote her off. About a month later she calls and asks how I am etc. I asked her what happened, long story short she says she lost her phone and why did I not email her since she did not return my calls. I questioned, where did she suddenly find my number and why did she not email me. I lied to her and told her I found someone else so that she would leave me alone.
I think the whole episode was shady.
Melo
March 30th, 2010
10:50 am
When was the last time someone professed their faith beyond a casual mention
@DAN…
maybe a long time ago..so that proves what??
Leggs
March 30th, 2010
10:50 am
Still their bible for their religion = the good book!
kimmie
March 30th, 2010
10:51 am
Dan, the blog spent half the day discussing faith and/or religion just recently, I think week before last. Both have come up several times.
SMH
THE INFAMOUS DK
March 30th, 2010
10:51 am
Raqi – Reread 10:18 Babe.. A woman to me might be something else in someone elses eyes.. And I know I have left bad tastes in Peoples mouths and my name is mud in certain circles but I know Im a man in every sense of the word.. It wasnt because I wasnt a man at the time I was with them either, it probably was a bad decision I made that wasnt cool for them. Might not have been cool for me either at the time but ya know.. The basics should apply on everyone but the intangibles are what make them special.. If we were all vanilla me and any one of these bloggers could get married tomorrow because we know what to expect..
Dan
March 30th, 2010
10:52 am
@Kimmie, Melo, SC
Then my bad. I don’t be around, my apologies.
@Carlito, to you too
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
10:52 am
aww…i love girls Easter dresses. So sweet.
Kimmie May 28th cain’t get here fast enough. Homework at this age is not easy….His science has been a study tip for me.
kinderbabe--35 days to liberation and counting!!!
March 30th, 2010
10:52 am
@sexycool…thanks for the three words.:) it’s perfect for where i am right now.
@Mo…hey there lady! hang in there w/the sinuses. i know how you feel.
SlimCoo-Coo
March 30th, 2010
10:53 am
“that his kisses are sticky or that he really can’t kiss”
SexyCool – arrrgghh! I hate a dude who tries to shove his whole tongue down my throat. It’s doesn’t take all that.
@melo – sometimes it’s so hard to read you. ??? If everyone knows I’m not exclusively dating them, would they feel slighted if I was with them the previous night and they saw me out with one of the other’s??? I’m sure they’d feel some kind of way just as I would but it is what it is right? I know knowing about me dating others is one thing as opposed to seeing it, but thankfully I haven’t had to deal with that as of yet.
Leggs
March 30th, 2010
10:53 am
@Carlito ~ good morning, my Italian Studmuffin.
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
10:56 am
Lito – What Ms. Shady she like her cowboys wearing spurs…and you playin’!
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
10:57 am
Can’t believe tomorrow is the last day in March!
wow…
SexyCool
March 30th, 2010
10:57 am
SlimGoody – went out with a dude that literally had *sticky spit*. I think I threw up in *his* mouth a little bit. LOL@
Leggs
March 30th, 2010
10:57 am
@Dan, hope you’re well. First, since you aren’t around a lot, it’s not wise to state what is or is not discussed on this blog! Just a little food for thought.
kinderbabe--35 days to liberation and counting!!!
March 30th, 2010
10:58 am
@cemeeli..i know, right? the month went by so fast. next thing we know, we’ll be saying happy new year again! lol
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
10:59 am
Dan, my apologies to you as well.
Cemeeli, I am on a horse…………….:)
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
11:02 am
Carlito….hunh?
“Look down…Back up”. Where are you?
You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like.
What’s in your hand? Back at me. I have it.
It’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love.
Look again, the tickets are now diamonds!
Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady.
now!….You lent licker!!!
SlimCoo-Coo
March 30th, 2010
11:02 am
SexyCool Sticky spit?!!! Ewwwww blech
Does that mean he also had that white foam in the corners of his mouth? YUCK!
Melo
March 30th, 2010
11:04 am
@Slim??
knowing u are dating some others and actually meeting u in a chance meeting with one of those others are 2 totally different things.
my point tho is,nobody owes nobody an explanation coz u arent exclusive..
if u decide not to answer the other dude’s phone call,u str8!
Melo
March 30th, 2010
11:05 am
Can’t believe tomorrow is the last day in March!
@Cee…
March been Mad!
Mo (aka Moeisha - aka Grouchy Smurf)
March 30th, 2010
11:06 am
Cemeeli – yeah I saw Ms Badu’s new video, wish I had seen it prior to all the speculations as to what the video’s meaning is but oh well.
SCool – Im headed to VA this weekend to kick with the fam. Clearly my workout regimen & diet may suffer a minor set back.
SexyCool
March 30th, 2010
11:06 am
Naw, Slim, I am usually out at the first sign of extra spittle at the corners. I see that and say to myself, “Don’t you feel that?”
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
11:09 am
Are you checking in today? mytwocents &2CPTG
@ Melo – Ditto!
kinderbabe--35 days to liberation and counting!!!
March 30th, 2010
11:10 am
@Mo…i watched the video for the first time yesterday too. wish i would have seen it before i read the commentary also.
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
11:10 am
Cemeeli, what the french toast?
Leggs
March 30th, 2010
11:10 am
WOW, just saw Ms. Badu’s video. She’s a sister with a msg. I don’t always like her voice, but I like this song.
SexyCool
March 30th, 2010
11:11 am
Cemeeli – I love that commercial, you Cootie Queen.
Dig That
March 30th, 2010
11:12 am
Whew! It’s crunk in here. Too much to catch up on. Hello to you all.
Melo
March 30th, 2010
11:13 am
where u saw it Leggs??
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
11:13 am
Lito…I always pick on the new people here.
“Lint Licker” is from the Orbitz commercial. I got my co-worker yesturday with that one, sending me a request to go home early…she was laughing so hard it was a no sound coming out of her mouth.
Dig That
March 30th, 2010
11:13 am
I was impressed with Ms. Badu. You can sit a bowl of noodles on dat booty.
Carlito
March 30th, 2010
11:14 am
Cemeeli, “What the french toast” is from the same commercial
Leggs
March 30th, 2010
11:14 am
I get the YBF report everyday…the link to the video is in it. I’ll send it to you. BTW, the girl has a butt on her!
Leggs
March 30th, 2010
11:15 am
Haaa, Dig That, I just said that without saying that (LOLOL).
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
11:15 am
@ Mo – VA is that place. as far as Badu – She ALWAYS on that stuff…maybe that’s why she sensitive ’bout her’s. Me too…lol
.
@ Dig – What’s up shawty?
AmazonRed™
March 30th, 2010
11:16 am
I want to ask, which one is the most lowly. The man who just breaks contact after 3 or 4 dates and vanishes. Or the woman who is gone and the man is the last person to know?
Carlito – The woman in this instance.
But I’m with the ladies and maintain the main isn’t the last person to know. He’s just the last to pay attention.
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
11:16 am
@ Lito – Yes, got it.
Melo
March 30th, 2010
11:18 am
You can sit a bowl of noodles on dat booty
@Dig That/Leggs??
if uall dont answer and tell me where u saw that, my head might just explode here with sexual angst!
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
11:19 am
It’s a “window seat”…Ya’ll get it, right?!!?
or maybe me and Badu the only one on that stuff.
AmazonRed™
March 30th, 2010
11:20 am
But typically, we don’t discuss religion, or more specifically, faith. Not that’s it’s taboo, it’s just been beaten to death and not really a topic for discussion.
Dan – So if the topic has been beaten to death…doesn’t that mean we discuss it?
Carlito – Talk about what you want. Folks are always gonna complain about the topic of religion. They’ll get over it.
SexyCool
March 30th, 2010
11:21 am
Melo – GOOGLE it, dude, dayum.
Dan
March 30th, 2010
11:21 am
http://www.erykahbadu.com/
click on the anck
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
11:23 am
@ SexyCool – I’m so done with yo’ self!!!
Badu video – “Google me boo”…
LL411... Smiling On The Inside Too!
March 30th, 2010
11:23 am
@ Raqi… ‘look this is what I need to stay in this relationship’.
They don’t really get this … until later when they realize I’d dropped my end of the jump rope and left the damm playgound!
Date 1 is a gimme for both of us, date 2… thinking… may or may not be a date 3. no explanation needed. Yeah one of us is going to wonder, oh well.
After dating someone a few months and “date faces” dropped (yes, I have one too), so did I. There were quite a few things about him I realized I just didn’t like, I guess you can say I just wasn’t that into him or him into me (thank God, I think he was off to the left, left!).
I only get concerned with the FADE if it’s a r’ship I’ve been in and vested for awhile (see playgound ref.)
Melo
March 30th, 2010
11:23 am
whats Google SexxyCl??
AmazonRed™
March 30th, 2010
11:27 am
SlimGoody – went out with a dude that literally had *sticky spit*.
SCool – OMG so did I! Such a shame, he had so much going for him, and he was 6′10″ we went out for almost a year tho, cuz he was so cool. We never did the do and kissed very little.
Dig That
March 30th, 2010
11:30 am
@Melo
My homeboy sent me a link on it and I was like dayummmm!!!
Cemeeli
March 30th, 2010
11:31 am
…i found a 4 lb bag of large gulf shrimp on sale for $25.00 at the market yesturday and was happy as heck about that! Any other not on sale these same shrimp could easliy go for 45-50 bucks!
We go through shrimp more than chicken at my place.
Dig That
March 30th, 2010
11:31 am
@Cemeeli
What it do mama? U good?