Too predictable
Guys, I hate to be the bearer of bad news but here it goes: You’ve become predictable. I know, it’s hard to hear. I spotted this on Twitter the other day: “Men don’t know how to throw curve balls anymore, they are so predictable.” quipped Amber Jolie a fellow blogger. I think she is referring to those good curve balls! That thing men do or say that really shows he’s in it to win her heart.
Women aren’t hard to please! Just as you guys are simple creatures, so are we..well we can be, sometimes. When the moons are aligned just right and you have managed to keep us smiling all week long. Seriously though, I think women are easy to please in the sense that we love to see gestures and efforts by the men we date. When a man does something out of the ordinary (see Friday’s post!) it adds to the attraction a great deal.
To be fair, women have moments of predictability too. Men can sometimes hold preconceived notions about what they consider to be typical woman behavior. Sadly, we end up affirming these and it becomes negative reinforcement. This is when women constantly call or text, worry about where the relationship stands every other minute. It’s something I don’t think a lot of women keep in mind when interacting with men.
Why do you think being predictable can be such a drag on a potential relationship? How could men and women avoid being too predictable?
accessAtlanta Partner Sites
Sections
Advertise on accessAtlanta.com »
Reach the audience you want by advertising on accessAtlanta.com
Join the Access Atlanta Network »
Advertisers and Publishers, expand your reach by joining the Access Atlanta Network.
Tell us what you think about the site
Visitor Agreement | Privacy Statement | About our ads
© 2013 The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
435 comments Add your comment
SexyCool
March 29th, 2010
3:08 pm
Um..yeah..well that particular ex could kill himSELF and I wouldn’t bat an eye.
And I will say that for 99% of the dudes that I have dealt with, I wish no ill will and have no problem being cordial to them – like dude from Saturday night’s text.
But, don’t make it sound like there is something wrong with me cause I don’t want to deal with them.
And for the select few that could fall off the face of the earth today, well, the world would be a better place without them.
lurker
March 29th, 2010
3:08 pm
I Am…and yes I’ve been there…not stood up even when meeting commando but hurt…a hurt that you can’t put in words but I dunno, not being a know it all nor being “hard” just not into being broken and broken down. Grieve and cry and do what you have to but then suck it up and move on. If it’s just the fact that you’re wanting him to know what he missed (remember…going commando) he can’t miss what’s still there and available. IF and I say if, he’ll going to reflect back and come to see he lost out on someone fantabulous it’s gotta be where he’s had enough time to go without, seeing you, having you, having access, know you’re no longer readily available. Move on. If he’s gonna miss you, it won’t be until then….most times. Not all. Sometimes they just move on. I still say men ain’t like us. They can set it aside and KIM
PrincessNik..T.G.I.F....Thang God I'm Fabulous
March 29th, 2010
3:09 pm
Hey All,
looks the topic has turned to when your Ex (x) becomes your why (Y), yall have had me laughing today especially Carlito. Hope everyone is having a good one!
Radiating Ardent & Quaint Intensity
March 29th, 2010
3:09 pm
I am, if you don’t want him back why do you keep entertaining it. Obviously the stuff that he has of yours is of no real value if you have gone this long without getting it back. That is something the police can help you get easily. That is if you wanted the stuff and not just to maintain contact with him.
Stop setting yourself up for that guy to use you because that just may be what you get in the end.
Or you want us to just talk at you about it.
Leggs
March 29th, 2010
3:10 pm
@I am ~ you used the words “don’t think.” Therefore, there’s a strong possibility!
My name is Rick James, BIOTCH!
kimmie
March 29th, 2010
3:10 pm
Okay, Carlito, looks like you’ve been holding out on us with the drama! You didn’t tell us you all ran into HER!
But cool Julia, yeah, a look is all it takes sometimes,lol!!
Radiating Ardent & Quaint Intensity
March 29th, 2010
3:11 pm
Grieve and cry and do what you have to
lurker, we have told her that before. She needs to get a dog.
SexyCool
March 29th, 2010
3:11 pm
And…I thought my response to Shthead’s Christmas text was quite cordial. And if nothing else, it was certainly effective. I haven’t heard from him since then.
PrincessNik..T.G.I.F....Thank God I'm Fabulous
March 29th, 2010
3:11 pm
I felt nothing now my Julia gave her a look that would have made Satan piss himself
Melo
March 29th, 2010
3:12 pm
but I don’t hate her for making a decision that she thought was best for her
@Dan??
what if it was best for her but at ur expense,or the expense of ur integrity,smehow??
like say,she sleeping with u but sleeping with another dude and u dont know but sme pple around u do and not telling u??
lurker
March 29th, 2010
3:12 pm
Oh and I Am…my 3:08 was because you seem to be into wanting him to want you…girl, move on…plain and simple.
RelldaRake - the nasty song as me sore
March 29th, 2010
3:13 pm
@Dan
i remember during pre-martial classes..they stated “marriage will be the first time you considering seriously killing someone when its bad”…let that sink in
Carlito
March 29th, 2010
3:13 pm
Sexy Cool, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but there is something wrong with you. You have toleit tissue stuck to your foot and your dress is tucked into your panties in the back. I expect better of management.
PrincessNik, how are you
Sassy, that was my claim to fame ( I think that is the next line, I am not using Google)
lurker
March 29th, 2010
3:14 pm
Radiating – I know. Maybe it’s theraupetic for her to hear someone say that…constantly. She don’t know this blog very well. It’s a thin line between getting empathy or the dumb brick thrown your way…lol
Luvbug
March 29th, 2010
3:15 pm
LuvBug, my ex made it a point to be at the local eatery when I was home, she always does that.
Carlito – Yeah, that’s suspect (or completely obvious)…Now I don’t call or follow, but if I were in your situation, I imagine myself saying, “Wow, you’re here everytime I’m here. Are you expecting me?”
Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)
March 29th, 2010
3:16 pm
he can’t miss what’s still there and available.
ditto….
Radiating Ardent & Quaint Intensity
March 29th, 2010
3:16 pm
If you see a dumb chick slap her with a brick. Brought to you by the Dumb Chick Rubber Brick Company.
I’m not only the founder but once a rubber brick slapped chick.
Dan
March 29th, 2010
3:18 pm
@Melo
Run your logic again.
Her cheating on me with/without my knowledge is not (does not equal) anything to do with MY integrity. If she was cheating, that was on her (for the record I doubt that she did).
Radiating Ardent & Quaint Intensity
March 29th, 2010
3:18 pm
She likes the airtime. All she has to do is input on the topic or random conversations. Heck flirt with Melo, he’ll give her all the attention she wants and some that she don’t. LOL
PrincessNik..T.G.I.F.Thank God I'm Fabulous
March 29th, 2010
3:19 pm
Carlito
I’m cool just been busy today trying to get ahead since i’m taking some days off later this week.
Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)
March 29th, 2010
3:19 pm
my 3:08 was because you seem to be into wanting him to want you…girl, move on…plain and simple.
SassaFrass now standing on the side of the ring yelling “Throw the towel…throw the dayum towel!”
that was my claim to fame
uuuuuused and abuuuuused theeem…..
Leggs
March 29th, 2010
3:19 pm
I’m not only the founder but once a rubber brick slapped chick.
PRICELESS!!
RelldaRake - the nasty song as me sore
March 29th, 2010
3:19 pm
If you see a dumb chick slap her with a brick. Brought to you by the Dumb Chick Rubber Brick Company.
I’m not only the founder but once a rubber brick slapped chick.
- again mason is a lucky arse dude..hit the lottery with you…per–od
I am whatever you say I am
March 29th, 2010
3:21 pm
Lurker= Troll
Carlito: I date but I’m not serious with anyone as of yet.
Carlito
March 29th, 2010
3:21 pm
Italian women, no explanation. The day I got there or the day before I got there, I cant remember. I got an email from her saying that she knew I would be in town, I cant remember. I did not respond, but somehow Julia was the reason she knew. (Italian women are extra territorial) that Saturday night there is one eatery that is old land Italian it all of the local families meet there on Saturday evenings if not for a meal but for a drink or so. Very small tight knit community. We walk in, my papa stands up to toast to Julia and I. At that point I just sensed a slight twitch in Julia I look at her and see her face then I look to see what she is staring at and it is the ex-fiance. I hear she is getting slapped around on the regular now. Oh well.
LL411... Smiling On The Inside Too!
March 29th, 2010
3:22 pm
@ Raqi….He is a space invader. And not the good kind.
There are two here…when they walk in my office instead of making eye contact with me their eyes are on my computer screen… just last Fridays one cross the “halt” line and came up to stand behind my chair.
Hell, she was so occupied with trying to look at my screen she went cross-eyed… my screen is at an angle away from the door.
RelldaRake - the nasty song as me sore
March 29th, 2010
3:22 pm
@lito…why come i-talian women dont date black dudes..did jungle fever scare them…lol…was is it gator or flipper…lol
kimmie
March 29th, 2010
3:22 pm
Lubug – I like that! “You’re expecting me?”
PrincessNik..T.G.I.F.Thank God I'm Fabulous
March 29th, 2010
3:23 pm
the ex-fiance
say what now?!?!
lurker
March 29th, 2010
3:23 pm
I’m not only the founder but once a rubber brick slapped chick.
LOL…that was funny
Sassyfrass…lol You are killing me.
I Am. You called me a troll? That was fuuunnny!!
Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)
March 29th, 2010
3:23 pm
Iffen ya cain’t take the heat then….
Carlito
March 29th, 2010
3:24 pm
I Am, just make sure your mind is right before you get into anything serious. If your “koo” needs to be adjusted just say that upfront to whomever the guy is. You owe it to yourself and the next man to have all issues resolved before proceeding.
Raqi, you are funny
kimmie
March 29th, 2010
3:25 pm
Carlito – I’m picturing all this in my head as I read it – an italian soap opera!LOL!!!
Radiating Ardent & Quaint Intensity
March 29th, 2010
3:25 pm
LOL Leggs, I am the last one to try and pretend like I have never been stupid for a man. I remember it like it was yesterday having what felt like a ton of bricks fall on me.
Luvbug
March 29th, 2010
3:26 pm
extra territorial
Now that spans women of all races, shapes, and ages.
Carlito
March 29th, 2010
3:26 pm
I just find it best to not say anything to an ex, I do not do the friend thing and in my ex finace’s case nothing at all. I do not say anything. My farts and burps are more important to me than her, because I at least say “excuse me” when they show up, even if I am alone.
I am whatever you say I am
March 29th, 2010
3:27 pm
Carlito: Issues from my past have been worked on and I am happy to more forward.
The only reason why I am not serious is that I haven’t met anyone yet that I want to be serious with.
I date and I have fun but it doesn’t mean everyone I date you can put them in a category of wanting to be serious with.
And to be clear, dating for me does not involve relations.
I save that for someone I’m serious with.
Lord Velonese
March 29th, 2010
3:27 pm
“Too predictable” WD Looks like you have not been around much and anyone else who thinks that.
Three words Daily – You’re sick People!
Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)
March 29th, 2010
3:27 pm
lurker baby girl seems to be a glutton for punishment from several angles…y’all goin in on that azz but it’s all on deaf ears. That reads like sumthing only a lil experience will remedy…mommy always said experience was/is the best teacher.
You know children call u names when they don’t have anything else to say…
Radiating Ardent & Quaint Intensity
March 29th, 2010
3:29 pm
just make sure your mind is right before you get into anything serious.
Hell screw that. Right now she qualifies for “The best way to get over one man is to get under another” event. It ain’t right but it’s sometimes okay. LOL
Carlito
March 29th, 2010
3:29 pm
Luvbug, I wish someone else on here could speak on Italian women. Once you have their heart your soul is theirs. New meaning to extra territorial, you are marked. it’s not overbearing but if she see’s someone eyeing and they disrespect her in the least. Watch out. “Don’t look them in the eye’s, that is a sign of disrespect and aggression”
Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)
March 29th, 2010
3:29 pm
I’m picturing all this in my head as I read it – an italian soap opera!
Or like that “table flipping” episode from Real H’se Wives of New Jersey…classic.
Melo
March 29th, 2010
3:30 pm
Um..yeah..well that particular ex could kill himSELF and I wouldn’t bat an eye.
@Sexxcool thats too strong!!
@Raqi
Heck flirt with Melo, he’ll give her all the attention she wants and some that she don’t.
esp when shes commando,who wants to ignore that??
@Dan
without my knowledge is not (does not equal) anything to do with MY integrity
maybe not altho other dudes will think u aint good throwing it down where it matters most hence her fleet footedness!
Radiating Ardent & Quaint Intensity
March 29th, 2010
3:31 pm
LL411, I will turn my monitor off in a second if a rubbernecker comes in. Even my boss don’t be all up in my work space and he owns the darn company. LOL
Carlito
March 29th, 2010
3:31 pm
I Am, if you are going to take Raqi’s advice my brother will be here soon. He needs some action. Other blog ladies, sorry you can’t have my brother. Why? Because I am selfish, messed up because I know we won’t hook up but that is the way it is. My virtual world is all MINE
LL411... Smiling On The Inside Too!
March 29th, 2010
3:33 pm
@ Raqi… If you see a dumb chick slap her with a brick. Brought to you by the Dumb Chick Rubber Brick Company.
I’m not only the founder but once a rubber brick slapped chick. LMAO
I confess me too!
Carlito
March 29th, 2010
3:33 pm
Sassy, my ex fiance would not act up to the point of a fight because Julia has to many brothers and sisters. It would not be safe for her around there. Some of those men would not hesitate to smack a woman up at all.
kimmie
March 29th, 2010
3:33 pm
Or like that “table flipping” episode from Real H’se Wives of New Jersey…classic.
Sassy – Okay?!!!LOL!! That was priceless!
Radiating Ardent & Quaint Intensity
March 29th, 2010
3:34 pm
I am whatever, you call lurker a troll but you are the one that keeps putting it out there. Don’t be it out there if don’t want people to respond honestly. If you read the remarks to you on a good day you would see how much they are in your favor and to your benefit. Hell girl some of us have been down that road. What is it you want us to say?
Sassy Me..Sun Kissed :-)
March 29th, 2010
3:34 pm
My virtual world is all MINE
Tsk,tsk,tsk…Carlito how u gonna block like that?