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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Need better matches?

After enduring some dating disaster or meeting a host of strange creatures, single people have to get proactive.  We can’t sit by and continue to let bad dates happen to us!  The thing is, it’s not necessarily difficult to attract people to you.

I could probably write a book about how to meet men who are handsome but know it and are arrogant.  I could teach a course on dating men who want all the perks of relationships and marriage but mention the big M word? They disappear faster than Tiger Wood’s sponsors.

The big question is: How do you attract the right people to you? The people you actually want to date past two weeks. The people that want what you want, when you want it.  Impossible? I don’t think so. Challenging? Definitely!

What are ways we can improve our chances of getting better matches?  If you aren’t online dating, you have to meet people more organically.   Is it possible to meet “The One” in a bar?

When you think about your last great date that developed into something substantial, where did you meet? Do you believe that the way you met and how you met made a real difference?

578 comments Add your comment

PrincessNIk

March 24th, 2010
3:55 pm

ARed i made that speculation earlier about the Monica CD. That isn’t cool at all!

Luvbug

March 24th, 2010
3:56 pm

Cemeeli – Livestrong.com has a good tool for keeping your calories. It’s called myplate.

PrincessNIk

March 24th, 2010
3:57 pm

Ya’ll be easy, i’m off to my second job….Motherhood ;)

Leggs

March 24th, 2010
4:01 pm

There I go talking about my big black toe this morning. It just popped through my stocking (already had a pedicure last week).

JtJ

March 24th, 2010
4:01 pm

@ Princess- Mr. JtJ says he got it from North Georgia Music over hear near Jimmy Carter. Monica hasd been my fav singer since “Just One of Dem Days” circa 1995. I don’t like the “Everything to Me” song, but I like “Still Standing” and “Love All Over Me”.

@ Cee- I got to hear sing live once and yes indeed, she can blow.

Cemeeli

March 24th, 2010
4:01 pm

I wish she cld do tours and more singing stuff…aint she losing an opportunity by spacing out her stuff like that. She is one of the better singers out there..

Melo She’s a mother she has 2 little boys…she has been through ALOT!!! I don’t think she’s into tryna stay on top in the limelight. A family oriented young lady. I agree she is one of the better young singers out there.

Very nice…

kimmie

March 24th, 2010
4:02 pm

Amred – The ANTM girl is Joslyn.

I am – We’ve talked a lot about dudes that do that “smile” mess. Read my post from earlier today on it. I’m just minding my own business! I wish I could get on a loud speaker all over the US & tell men not to say that!

kimmie

March 24th, 2010
4:03 pm

Leggs – How did your lunch date go?

I am whatever you say I am

March 24th, 2010
4:03 pm

Enter your comments here

Carlito

March 24th, 2010
4:03 pm

You can download the Monica CD from itunes :)

Carlito

March 24th, 2010
4:05 pm

Well, the smile thing is an excellent opener sometimes. Certainly do not use it all of the time.

AmazonRed™

March 24th, 2010
4:06 pm

Well, the smile thing is an excellent opener sometimes

Never.

I am whatever you say I am

March 24th, 2010
4:06 pm

Ared: Sometimes the simpliest things get you the furthest with people.

The men that get further with me are the ones that step without trying any game or lame A$$ pick up line.

Cemeeli

March 24th, 2010
4:07 pm

ITunes is da bomb…got a gift card for the childboy’s birthday gift.. Hope he gives me $2.

Lol thanks for the reminder Carlito – When i plug in that ITouch to the TV speakers the sound is great.

Happykitty not SlimOne

March 24th, 2010
4:08 pm

“why is does it seem there is never enough time in the day to accomplish all the things you set out to do most days”

Princessnik It really isn’t that hard, especially when you don’t have anything to do. lol

I am whatever you say I am

March 24th, 2010
4:09 pm

the smile is never an excellent opener unless the person is actually smiling and you compliment on her smile and keep it movin

Rell unplugged

March 24th, 2010
4:10 pm

You can download the Monica CD from itunes

- i thought the same like get with the times…sell out where…i found about 6 FREE downloads before i typed this for her CD..LOL

Cemeeli

March 24th, 2010
4:10 pm

Mo – You back? I’m about to dip…keep them homegrown boys in your neck of the woods, k maam!?!!? lol :)

kimmie

March 24th, 2010
4:11 pm

I am – Read my 10:49 & my 11:00

Carlito – It’s irritating. Plain & simple.

Cemeeli

March 24th, 2010
4:12 pm

Rell- I love the free stuff in the Itune store…my boy don’t want me to buy nothing off his Itune cards! He stingy!!!

DreamsMaterialize

March 24th, 2010
4:12 pm

Monica can sang!…heard her live several times…girl can blow

Yeah she can blow. I just get frustrated that most of her cd’s haven’t really exploited that fact. Often the songs compromise her vocal skills so that they can be catchy.

Gorgeous Green Eyes

March 24th, 2010
4:13 pm

From places I have worked at to Discos through set-ups with friends, and shopping, getting gas, banking, restaurants (met a Delta Pilot (hot) :) to filing police reports (DETECTIVES ARE SEXY!): :) :) and to on-line….Well, no shortage of MEN….BUT you have to see it as trade-offs….some guys will be hot as heck but lack other stuff. No age requirement here….I can attract any age….Most men (that are available) can be very approachable…first of all YOU have to be approachable yourself and most of all be positive and radiate confidence..Men love a sexy, independent and confident woman. So in order to attract a better match BE A BETTER YOU!

Leggs

March 24th, 2010
4:14 pm

Monica announced this morning that she will be going on tour. Her boys’ school has agreed to send a tutor with them on tour. She’s taking her boys with her.

@kimmie ~ went to Habachi and it was very, very good. Nice convo and love his teef. He’s 39. Hmmm, who knows, maybe these cobwebs won’t have to turn into dreadlocks afterall! :wink: :lol:

Professor

March 24th, 2010
4:14 pm

Well gang have a great evening.

AmazonRed™

March 24th, 2010
4:14 pm

I think Monica is a great singer. Ghetto tho. I can’t stand that single she has out right now.(Everything to me).

AmazonRed™

March 24th, 2010
4:15 pm

Hmmm, who knows, maybe these cobwebs won’t have to turn into dreadlocks afterall!

:shock: :lol:

Dang…it’s been that long Leggs? :lol:

AmazonRed™

March 24th, 2010
4:16 pm

Jazmine Sullivan wrote that single Monica has out right now. No wonder I don’t like it…I’m not a J. Sullivan fan.

Melo

March 24th, 2010
4:16 pm

Well, the smile thing is an excellent opener sometimes

@Carlito??

probably excellent if step to her smiling urself which lets her open up and want to talk to u. Accusing her of not smiling puts her on the defensive..u dont want a woman to be on the defensive be4 u make the approach to her,do u??

Melo

March 24th, 2010
4:17 pm

who knows, maybe these cobwebs won’t have to turn into dreadlocks afterall

the rabbit aint even scratching the surface!!

:lol: :lol:

Cemeeli

March 24th, 2010
4:17 pm

@ Leggs – That’s good. Yeah she’s all about the boys.

Carlito

March 24th, 2010
4:18 pm

Well, I know not to use the “smile” if I ever meet you two. There are many different variations of the smile approach as well and it’s obvious every woman does not feel that way. Maybe some should try “what it do, shorty” nope that will get you shot down. “Hello, how are you?” nope that will get you shot down. “Hello, I am Carlito” that can get you shot down as well. There are a lot of factors of an approach. And fact of the matter is some women just do not like to approached no matter what you say.

Carlito

March 24th, 2010
4:19 pm

Melo, if you accuse a women of not smiling for any reason as an opener, well that is just dumb. You don’t just go all gangster “Why arent you smiling?” who does that?

Carlito

March 24th, 2010
4:21 pm

I like that Usher song “There goes my baby” has anyone heard it? Sounds like the Usher of Old is back :)

Melo

March 24th, 2010
4:21 pm

Ghetto tho

Ared??

:lol: :lol:

yeah,I met her one time in the deck in a club and a ghetto club too, back in the day.I was like 2 seats away from her

Very real tho! Jus like me! :lol:

I am whatever you say I am

March 24th, 2010
4:21 pm

Hello, I am Carlito will equal to Pleasure to meet you. My name is I am

Cemeeli

March 24th, 2010
4:22 pm

@ Dreams – Yeah, she should not sing catchy song. Her gift is supressed in most of them.

Carlito

March 24th, 2010
4:23 pm

“hello, I am Carlito”

she says “AND??”

LOL

Cemeeli

March 24th, 2010
4:23 pm

Very real tho! Jus like me!

sometimes u too real! lol…is that possible?

Carlito

March 24th, 2010
4:24 pm

Give her a smiley face, ladies love the smiley face. LOL :)

kimmie

March 24th, 2010
4:24 pm

Carlito, 4 women on this blog are telling you that tired ORDER to SMILE is irritating, nothing more, nothing less. “Hello, how are you or I’m Carlito – that’s fine, so if anyone has a problem with that, they have a problem, not your problem tho.

Just one of those things that if you ask a lot of women, they find irritating.

DreamsMaterialize

March 24th, 2010
4:25 pm

Yeah, she should not sing catchy song. Her gift is supressed in most of them.
I like her first cd the most.

AmazonRed™

March 24th, 2010
4:25 pm

Carlito – More than two women weighed in and not ONE said it was a good opening..so it’s definitly NOT an excellent one. It’s just one that some women would tolerate. There are certain silly lines that go on in the dating world that you just have to let go. But I think you’d be hard pressed to find a woman who’d actually recommend that one.

Leggs

March 24th, 2010
4:25 pm

@Melo, Monica was very ghetto back in the day. She’s been through a lot and has witnessed things that can break and average person. Her fortitude to do better with her life, provide a safe and loving home for her boys and respect for herself and her craft is why she’s STILL STANDING!!!

Cemeeli

March 24th, 2010
4:26 pm

@ Dreams – First one was really good. I’m tryin to remember what i was doing bak then…

kimmie

March 24th, 2010
4:26 pm

Amred – I concur about Monica, if I hear that song again I will scream. Nothing against her, but yeah, a little ghetto. Just not my style.

Carlito

March 24th, 2010
4:26 pm

Kimmie, I am not buying what you all are selling. LOL

Carlito

March 24th, 2010
4:28 pm

4 women on this blog is not a great beta test imo.

Melo

March 24th, 2010
4:28 pm

She’s been through a lot and has witnessed

@Leggs??

like what??

I am whatever you say I am

March 24th, 2010
4:29 pm

Kimmie I read your posts
I concur!!!!!

I would like to further add that if you are staring at me you make it less likely for me to smile back, conversate, or whatever.
The stalker stare look always puts up my defenses.

kimmie

March 24th, 2010
4:29 pm

Carlito – I have this thing about Italy, italian food & italian men. A lot of women do. So all you would have to do is capitalize on that. Just be your cool italian self. Sounds like a real winner of a lady you’re dealing with anyway.LOL!!