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Single again

One of the trickiest things to deal with post-break up is “reclaiming yourself” so to speak.  For example, you rediscover your friends.  I’m talking the great ones that don’t hold grudges because you all but disappear from the land of the living with your boo.  You get back to doing the things that only you enjoy doing — out in the open, without fear of getting strange looks from your significant other.

You will also have to adjust to sleeping alone again, cooking for one, and having to find a “plus one” for parties.  Sounds slightly depressing, doesn’t it?  Whether you were the dumper or dumpee, you are probably dealing with some kind of emotion. Guys, you can call it something else, if you want to, but you go through “something” too!

What are the best ways to deal with break-ups?  I am referring to the bad breakups that make you feel as if you’ve gone a couple of rounds with Pacquiao – except you actually landed tough punches.

How do you adjust to life after <insert wonderful/horrible ex-mate’s name here>?  Does it help when you are able to forge a friendship with the person? Is that even a good idea?

Your turn: What is the best way to handle a break up?

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539 comments Add your comment

Raqi

March 22nd, 2010
3:04 pm

From reading those text he talked about how it would ruin his career if he were to be seen with some of the wh*res.

Only because he is married. I really don’t think they cared that much when he not tarnishes the image of the happily married man.

SexyCool...

March 22nd, 2010
3:05 pm

And I will co-sign Rell’s 259p.

Leggs

March 22nd, 2010
3:05 pm

Excellent comeback, Carlito :arrow: I do know if my question was repetitive or not. I just stopped smoking this past weekend”

Carlito

March 22nd, 2010
3:06 pm

Leggs, she trusts me I told her about the blog. I told her about you, Melo, Professor, AmazonRed and that guy she fights with and I can’t remember the other bloggers name who just seems like she has a chip on her shoulder 75% of the time. When you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to hide :)

SexyCool...

March 22nd, 2010
3:06 pm

Kimmie – I already I have. I will send it to you. Although, it may not be until tomorrow.

Raqi

March 22nd, 2010
3:07 pm

Maybe she won’t listen to you, etc.

Listen to what, Carlito? You all don’t talk. Remember. :lol:

DreamsMaterialize

March 22nd, 2010
3:07 pm

I do not remember asking that.
You didn’t ask it. Infamous stated that all women on this blog have cheated before, and those who reponded said that they have never cheated. I think SexyCool neither confirmed nor denied. lol

kimmie

March 22nd, 2010
3:08 pm

Thanks SCool & Leggs!

RelldaRake - the nasty song as me sore

March 22nd, 2010
3:08 pm

@raqi..yep men will try and switch up too…the lack of communication will kill a relationship.

the baby part….babies do need some attending but sometimes wifes will go over board with all the extra attention they get from having a baby and also caring for one..yes i helped you make it…what did we do to make it..lets not forget that….and i have cared for young kids before and you dont need to sit and stare at em for hours…they not going to get up and go anywhere..but your husband will..straight to black cherry on the pole….or the local bar….or anything else that will give him a good feeling..versus a crying kid…and a unattentive wife….

Carlito

March 22nd, 2010
3:08 pm

To tired to cheat, means she is doing her job at home :) (Trying my best to be The Devils Advocate today)

Raqi

March 22nd, 2010
3:09 pm

the most anti-seductive thing for a women is not to be paid attention by the man she chose to be with

Ding, ding, ding. Rell you win the post of the day. LOL That right there needs to be posted on billboards, t-shirts and bumper sticker. :lol:

AmazonRed™

March 22nd, 2010
3:09 pm

Carlito – I’ve never cheated on my man.

I did break up with one once cuz I became interested in another. But it really had nothing to do with the new dude, old dude was trippin. :lol:

Carlito

March 22nd, 2010
3:11 pm

Raqi, you have a good marriage and from what it sounds like a faithful and happy husband. You should be running a blog somewhere to help others achieve your status.

AmazonRed™

March 22nd, 2010
3:11 pm

AmazonRed and that guy she fights with

Carlito – There is a whole list. Even after I took my haitus.

But I think you’re refering to DK in this instance. :lol:

Carlito

March 22nd, 2010
3:13 pm

AmazonRed, you are not one of the women who needs a man to define her, from what little I know from reading. You just march to your own beat and if a man does not get on beat you just keep on your own pace.

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 22nd, 2010
3:13 pm

I just stopped smoking this past weekend.

Y’een stop..she threw your isht away…right before she went back out of town.

Swiss umm okay.

RelldaRake - the nasty song as me sore

March 22nd, 2010
3:15 pm

Elin could have been swinging from the chandeliers every day, 4 times a day and on the rode with him, but if he was going to cheat, he was going to cheat

-@kimmie…thats the thing…..if she was he would have chilled…trust that…i am telling you..are reading

1 – good poo cee does not and i repeat does not get old and boring

2- good “head” does not and i repeat does not get old and boring

3- fun, flexible women do not get boring or cheated on

4- men are attracted to vitality – (young chick, chicks full of live, active women, smart women, resourceful women..etc etc

5- women that own there sexuality

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 22nd, 2010
3:15 pm

t-shirts and bumper sticker.

pens,pencils and coffee mugs…

Carlito

March 22nd, 2010
3:16 pm

“Don’t you know I am in love with you woman, I like no other women. Oops my bad, I thought you were my other woman” (I can’t remember but its from some rap song)

Some people just cheat and they will either stay that way for life or until they find someone they value enough not to hurt.

Carlito

March 22nd, 2010
3:17 pm

SassyMe, you , LuvBug and I need to have a meeting of the minds. :)

AmazonRed™

March 22nd, 2010
3:17 pm

AmazonRed, you are not one of the women who needs a man to define her, from what little I know from reading. You just march to your own beat and if a man does not get on beat you just keep on your own pace.

Carlito :D

Actually, one may be surprised at how traditional I am. I don’t mind being submitting or being a housewife and having to be dependent on my husband.

I still don’t take no mess tho. You’re certainly right about that.

Melo

March 22nd, 2010
3:17 pm

some men will try to introduce some new stuff just because now she is wife

@Raqi!

but shldnt that be a necessity for 2 pple that are married,ie exploring for the betterment of u 2.I can tell u,we neva used to make luv the way we do now.Thanks to what i learnt from u sluts guys! :lol: Now,if we hadnt agreed to explore,either one of us wld be unfulfilled coz they wld be hearing stff from folks but the partner is not willing to explore and discuss and try.

I bet u folks havent reached the end of learning new stuff either??

@Blog??/Rell

whats a golden shower/dome? (as in Tiger texts)

sme new to learn and prtacrcrice again!?? :-)

Carlito

March 22nd, 2010
3:18 pm

AmazonRed, you grew up with your father in the home, did you not?

Raqi

March 22nd, 2010
3:18 pm

kimmie, you know what I say about those texts? If they saved they saved them for a reason. Just like Monice Le.. saved that dress. She had an agenda the whole time and planned to have evidence in the end.

I wouldn’t doubt the ones that saved those TW texts were planning on cashing in at the end of day. Planning to use them to black male him should ever try to leave. Unfortunately for them it all played out differently. The wife peeped his game before any blank checks could be written.

AmazonRed™

March 22nd, 2010
3:19 pm

AmazonRed, you grew up with your father in the home, did you not?

Yes. We were modern day Cleavers. :lol:

Carlito

March 22nd, 2010
3:19 pm

Raqi, true their plan backfired. Elin says “That’s her money and she needs it NOW!!” LOL

Raqi

March 22nd, 2010
3:20 pm

LOL Sassy. Yep. No truer statement has ever been made. Sounds like Rell knows a little bit about us womenfolk. :lol:

Raqi

March 22nd, 2010
3:21 pm

Carlito, I am still learning and figuring this thing out myself. And besides no two women or men are alike.

Carlito

March 22nd, 2010
3:21 pm

AmazonRed, I can tell. You remind me tons of my sister. To the outside she is strong and independent but she just waited on the right man to marry and now she is just a working happy home maker.

kimmie

March 22nd, 2010
3:24 pm

Raqi – Yes, so true, they were probably thinking “Monica Lewinsky” the whole time!LOL!!

And the ole, “my wife doesn’t understand me, she won’t give it up, she’s a b—-, she spends too much time on the kids, she won’t do ___, etc” – uh, yeah, right, heard it all before, Tiger.

AmazonRed™

March 22nd, 2010
3:25 pm

Carlito – I would indeed love to be at home. It was great having not having to be a “latchkey kid.”

However, the men I date don’t have any real money, so I’m gonna be realistic with that one. :lol:

RelldaRake - the nasty song as me sore

March 22nd, 2010
3:26 pm

Rell knows a little bit about us womenfolk

- actually i dont..but i learn every day…but alot of things are common sense when you strip away the things you want….there is a flow that is there between a man and women even when you are not talking..if you are intuned to the ways of women..meaning attention…attention and did i mention attention…example…i went to a strip club over this last week…did not spend a dime on a dance…but had the ladies coming over to me after they worked with there customers…i asked one of them why..she said “your attention and energy is different…you not on the sex vibe”…i could not stop laughing but imagine that…of course i kidded her about gaming me..but she said no fo real…she said” i am so tired of grinding on dizzle for chump change, i want a boyfriend”

Leggs

March 22nd, 2010
3:27 pm

@kimmie ~ I was about to say, WHAT??? But I gotcha! Recipe has been sent!

Raqi

March 22nd, 2010
3:27 pm

exploring for the betterment of u 2

Melo, that is different than what I am talking about. If you know your true passion is to be spanked by bearded mexican midget, that’s something you need to let the woman you are about to marry know before hand. LOL You can’t be having that midget jump out the closet on your wedding night. LOL

kimmie

March 22nd, 2010
3:28 pm

Thanks again Leggs!

Professor

March 22nd, 2010
3:29 pm

…stepping back in!

@Carlito that is cool you told her about the blog. Question: How many bloggers will tell their SO about blogging on here?

@Melo~ I saw the sign announcing the pub, but I went to wet willy’s for a cool one to drink. BTW you get out a lot!

Carlito

March 22nd, 2010
3:30 pm

AmazonRed, la bella vita :)

Leggs

March 22nd, 2010
3:30 pm

@Carlito ~ I’ll bite, what did you tell your little kumquat about all of us?

AmazonRed™

March 22nd, 2010
3:30 pm

Question: How many bloggers will tell their SO about blogging on here?

*crickets*

He already thinks I’m crazy enough! No need for him to see it in print! :lol:

AmazonRed™

March 22nd, 2010
3:31 pm

So…I was going thru my “stash” and realize that they all expired in 2008. :oops:

I’ve been to Target and Walmart and can’t find those Magnum condoms anywhere. Where do they sell those?

Carlito

March 22nd, 2010
3:32 pm

Professor, it is my opinion anything that is kept secret is up to know good. Unless it’s like a gift or something.

Leggs

March 22nd, 2010
3:32 pm

@Melo ~ do not practice golden shower on Queen…she won’t like it! It takes a special slut mindset to like that crap!

kimmie

March 22nd, 2010
3:32 pm

Professor – I talk to my SO about the blog all the time & some of the crazy stuff discussed on here. He submitted a post to a political podcast he listens to all the time & it was mentioned.

It’s our own little separate worlds but nothing to be secretive about.

Raqi

March 22nd, 2010
3:33 pm

Where do they sell those?

Walgreens. The adult stores. Online.

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 22nd, 2010
3:33 pm

need to have a meeting of the minds.

Uhh huh ;)

Sounds like Rell knows a little bit about us womenfolk.

Sure does….who’dve thunk it :)

Raqi

March 22nd, 2010
3:33 pm

Yep, my husband knows.

RelldaRake - the nasty song as me sore

March 22nd, 2010
3:34 pm

Question: How many bloggers will tell their SO about blogging on here

a woman i am trying to date has lurked on here for a minute..lol..and she remember some of comments and blow ups…funny stuff. She is up on blog history..you dont have to tell them atlanta is small…face book and twitter makes it smaller…a friend came to me today and said..wise diva is following me on twitter…lol

Melo

March 22nd, 2010
3:34 pm

Raqi!

what if i have neva heard about it be4 marriage??

does the fact that i hear about it now that we married and want to try it make it a bad idea coz we neva did it be4??

u know some married women do not even give their men some head (from what ive heard on the blog..think Tazzee said so..i maybe wrong)

(i wld think those men are excused if they cheat) :roll:

U know how u females keep raising the bar on psh skills?? :lol: a married couple wont keep up! :lol:

Leggs

March 22nd, 2010
3:35 pm

@ARed ~ you got me to thinking…neva thought about it…thank you!!

RelldaRake - the nasty song as me sore

March 22nd, 2010
3:35 pm

Sure does….who’dve thunk it

- wow sas, really….i spend alot of time alone…so i think, read and try not to make the same mistakes twice…i am a thinker love…you guys just experienced and unbalanced libra…thats what happens when were not balance..we go off..and i mean way off…i am cool now. ….i see puppies and rainbows again…thanks to my peoples!