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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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Spring clean your love life

The first day of spring is almost here and you know what that means!  It’s time to spring clean, de-clutter, and simplify your life.   All the heavy baggage that you have been carrying around with during the winter and fall seasons should be checked. If you are attached to someone that you no longer want to be tied to, be upfront and cut the ties now.  Free them up (and yourself) to move on and find someone else who is better suited for them.

I think this season can always be the time of year when you could spice up your life and bring new balance.  Sometimes that means you have to get rid of some toxic people. Be very afraid text offenders! If there are potential dates that have been stringing you along with no real effort to move toward something substantial, weed them out now.  Make room for the people and things that are more worthwhile! Maybe spring is the best time to date around. It is easier to meet people because we go out more in warmer temperatures and a lot of us are in happier moods!

What are some ways you could spring clean your life?  I think I will get rid of some cynicism I have been harboring the last few weeks.  I believe a shift in attitude can go a long way.  What do you think you can spring clean away that can make a difference for you?

495 comments Add your comment

Lady J

March 18th, 2010
8:45 am

Top of the morning crew!!!!!

If there are potential dates that have been stringing you along with no real effort to move toward something substantial, weed them out now. Make room for the people and things that are more worthwhile!

^That will be my early morning mental reminder….ha!

While the slate is clean I must keep this in mind with meeting new exciting people and not get caught up in the same cycle…..sure I will let my guard down some but try not to fall for the known of NOTHING and let that be thinking it could turn into something else…..One day I hope to master this concept…..lol

Friday is tomorrow! There is hope! LOL

Professor

March 18th, 2010
8:47 am

Hola!

Great topic Diva.

What are some ways you could spring clean your life?

For me I always look inside and around to see what needs to be fixed. Currently I am working on fulfilling my 2010 list of action. That list includes having more fun, networking more and just overall getting the most out of me. I am constantly in the cleaning mode, I refuse to let people and situations drain me.

Lady J

March 18th, 2010
8:50 am

Proff it feels great to release that draining factor…..It is so time consuming and runs off great girlfriends!!!!! I smile more and I love it bc I am not consumed withthe what if questions and harrassing everyone in sight when I now the answer to the silly ass questions….lol LOVE IT!

Professor

March 18th, 2010
8:55 am

Hey Lady J!

You are so right I LOVE IT TOO! I wish I would have known this in my early 20s, oh well I don’t look back and regret either, but still.

Lady J, I must confess I have two or three girlfriends that I have been friends with for over 20-25 years. Now if we would have met recently we would not be friends, however I do not hang with them often only two or three times per year and the rest is emails or a quick call. They are draining, but do to the lenghth of our friendship I keep them around at a distance. It works for me they are good people that never grew up.

Professor

March 18th, 2010
8:56 am

Lady J Have you met any cool people at school? I have been meaning to ask you about school and the folks there.

DreamsMaterialize

March 18th, 2010
8:58 am

Morning
I don’t wait until Spring to clean house, just like I don’t wait until the New Year to make resolutions. Everyday is a good day for self improvement.

Lady J
Whatever transition you’re going through right now, it’s very noticeable, in a good way. You sound really happy. Just putting that out there to let you know it’s recognized. ;-)

Mrs. Theighforsmeh Tubeeahbych

March 18th, 2010
9:00 am

My first actions of spring cleaning for 2010 will be to hand out some reprimands and if ineffective follow-up with some pink slips.

Lady J

March 18th, 2010
9:04 am

Proff age doesn’t matter you got it at your correct season and so did I and I am HAPPY!!!!! YIPPPPIE!!!!! LOL I too have am mastering keeping folk @ a distance….We all need our space and it is not done intentionally….we all are at different phases of our journey and I look @ it like if you are apart of that season you will be if not you won’t…..Over the past 9 to 10 years my circle has been adjusted and @ 26 I couldn’t understand it and thought the world was against J but know @ 30 I realize seasons end, journey go on with and without folk for a reason and it is ok to know folk are still apart of the circle indirectly…..It was a growing pain experience for me bc I thought I lost what was my BFF from college but our season ended….I love her deeply and I know she loves me but we maximized our time and life goes on……Great people have entered my world friends for life, some I am still yet to meet in person but I know without a doubt if I needed anything they would have my back…..I embrace what God has for me and not question it any more!

Lady J

March 18th, 2010
9:06 am

Awwwww thanks DreamsMaterialize!!!!!!! I am having a party with J…..I ran from myself all my life and just now tapping into my worth and respect for me!!!!! I am learning my value and respect what God has brought me through for a second chance of a beautiful life ahead! Can you say CRYING NOW! Going to get some tea! LOL

Mrs. Theighforsmeh Tubeeahbych

March 18th, 2010
9:07 am

Me as a person, everyone can stand some improvement. As for relationships, I strive daily to be a better wife and friend to my husband. I try my best and will try harder to be a good mother. I don’t have any friends that I need to shed. All my girls are good people.

Luvbug

March 18th, 2010
9:07 am

Fortunately, I don’t have any toxic guys (dust mites) to get rid of. I’m allergic, so I clean as I go. However, I should get out there and take in the change in scenery.

SlimOne on autopilot

March 18th, 2010
9:09 am

On topic
Morning I really need to spring clean my closet. lol I did my relationship ‘Spring Cleaning’ last year so i’m okay in that department so far. ;-)

Off topic
Went to the Relationship Talk at the Room Service Lounge and a few points of the discussion were:

-Men don’t care what you do but more so how we make them feel
-In finding a mate:
you have to decide how the two of you compliment each other
respect each other and date the person, not the package
be honest, honest, honest
if you know better, then do better (stop falling into old bad cycles)

And for successful relationship it takes
communication
collaboration (teamwork makes the dreamwork)
connection (not only tolerate one another but celibrate each other)

Last but not least, STAY OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY

The end – Now back to your regularly scheduled program (Slim now sitting face forward in the corner of the room)

Mrs. Theighforsmeh Tubeeahbych

March 18th, 2010
9:09 am

I would love to spring clean my wardrobe and start afresh. But it’s not financially feasible right now. LOL

Mrs. Theighforsmeh Tubeeahbych

March 18th, 2010
9:13 am

Slim, get out of the corner. Those are some good pointers. You should have sent them to WiseDiva for topic ideas. Not that we don’t daily start our own topics, but those are good.

And you know even when we think we already know something, it doesn’t hurt to be reminded every so often. I strive to stay mindful, but sometimes I need a little help.

Dig That

March 18th, 2010
9:14 am

I treat everyday like spring cleaning. With time should come wisdom and I learned at an early age that if I didn’t then from my childhood until adulthood would be doomed. I sat there and watched it in my surroundings. Now I don’t necessarily label my circles put I do put people and things in the proper perspective of either not good for me, good for me or just good to me. Life is too short to allow others to dictate and I’m too intelligent to be sucked in to a trifling existence other than the ones I create just being human. I try to limit my complaints and count my blessings. If we are blessed to see another day than the sky is the limit and EVERYTIME YOU SEE ME IT IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.

Lady J

March 18th, 2010
9:16 am

Dig That you are a jovial person!

Lady J

March 18th, 2010
9:19 am

Proff funny you asked that….With my social butterfly personality when I say I meet no strangers it is the truth….not only have I connected with some of my classmates, one has confided a deep secret to me bc our 1st interaction was so cool and real…..I was blown away my 1st test at practing confidentialty…..girl we clicked and again we need each other for this program….I am a firm believer where ever you are in your journey you are suppose to be there and God makes no mistakes in my world! We embraced each other and she called me last night…..I am good people Proff and I recognize I have a gift that God has blessed me with and now it is time to use it!

Dig That

March 18th, 2010
9:20 am

Dig That you are a jovial person!

@Lady J
It sure beats the opposite and I have been the opposite so I can tell the difference. I want to say to you that I am hugging you right now. Sounds like you have a great outlook on not being drained anymore. Not being trapped and you are breaking free. You go baby!!!! Shake off the old and get to the new you. Anybody don’t like it can kick rocks.

Lady J

March 18th, 2010
9:26 am

@Anybody don’t like it can kick rocks. That is the theme boo and the amazing part of that them is I DON’T QUESTION it and run back out of fear of being alone!!!!!! It is a shouting power i turn down dates, hook ups, and some even potential dates when I know that ish ain’t about NOTHInG!!!!!!

That is the part I love! I couldn’t do that 4 years ago but now I can!!!!!!

Thanks for the hug!!!!!! :)

Mrs. Theighforsmeh Tubeeahbych

March 18th, 2010
9:28 am

I treat everyday like spring cleaning

DigThat, while that is a good way to live it’s not always possible or reality.

Just life in general I clean my house everyday within the realms everyday living. Dishes, laundry, toilets, dusting, beds and whatnot. And the house is clean. But then there is a time for spring cleaning. A time set aside to go thru every drawer, closet, nook and cranny to take out the old and useless and replace with update and necessities.

That’s how life is. We live and some things just kinda get stockpiled. Those things can be something that needs to get dealt with but this time is not the right time. Sometimes you have lay it all out in your mind or to someone else to see what is all there. To determine what is clutter and what just needs to be reworked or rearranged. Then there are things that are useful that you forgot about.

I wish life was that simple that I could “declutter” every idle, toxic, draining thought and/or situation at the end of every day. But it’s just not like that for me. I wish it was but that’s not my reality.

I am glad you have that ability and forethought. I’ll keep working at it.

PrincessNIk

March 18th, 2010
9:34 am

Good Morning ya’ll

Spring Cleaning

Well, I’ve started the process by putting distance between myself and people who only have their best interest at heart. And I haven’t lost a minute of sleep either! One particuluar person however is not taking it well, OH WELL! LOL. I’ve decided to start doing more for myself, getting out more, meet new people. Every since I turned 30 back in July my fav thing to tell people is I’m good and grown now. So its time for me to act like it. I have to make some commitments to myself, prior to being able to offer a committment to anyone else.

AmazonRed™

March 18th, 2010
9:35 am

Happy March Madness everyone! My bracket is done and I’m ready to take the top prize in the pools!

Spring cleaning…funny you mention that Miss Diva! Already done! I’m usually great for not looking back in any of my relationships. I did have an ex who was lurking around. I allowed it cuz I figured it be nice to actually be cool with one for a change. :lol: But he lied to me about some basic stuff, so he had to get cut for good. Poor thing, he didn’t even see that cuzz out coming.

I feel so free. :lol:

DreamsMaterialize

March 18th, 2010
9:39 am

STAY OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY
This was my FB status sometime last week. Most times, we are the obstacle in our lives. How you doing this morning Slim?

I am a firm believer where ever you are in your journey you are suppose to be there
Lady J This is pretty much my motto. Everything happens exactly the way it’s supposed to.

i'm swiss

March 18th, 2010
9:39 am

Live from Boston, waiting at the airport, still recuperating from St. Patty’s in Beantown…

Morning, all. Not much to say on topic — luckily my life is already pretty tidy. Guess I’ll save the “A” material for Freaky Friday tomorrow. :-)

One totally off topic professional observation: It’s amazing how many people manage to land jobs managing web sites of major universities without knowing anything at all about web development. Even at technical schools. Not sure how that happens — but at least it’s good news for my own job security, I suppose…

Kym

March 18th, 2010
9:42 am

Good Morning All,

I have spring clean fever now. I am tossing out old stuff and giving much away. Time for a fresh start. I bought one of those hand held steamers because I am on this going green clean..kick now. As for friends and family I count it joy to have them all in my life. I am always growing as a person..and still working on “Seeking first to understand..then to be understood.” As for the love life I am focus more on me so that if loves calls again..I will be ready.

Lady J-you can’t experiEnce success without failure!!!!!

March 18th, 2010
9:43 am

DreamsM you got it!!!!!!!

@PrincessNIk girl I laughed my behind off late last night about that llate comment you made yesterday afternoon!!!!! Girl that was too damn funny! LOL

Yall are some cool blog buddies!

Dig That

March 18th, 2010
9:44 am

@Mrs Theighforsmeh
Some things are easier to accomplish than others and the way I grew up made this a priority to me on a daily basis as opposed to seasonal basis. I had to learn earlier than I wanted to that life will swallow you up if don’t pay attention. It is more about a knowledge of self more and extremely deep motivation. When I did let things stockpile I always found myself at the very bottom of the pile unable to breathe, unable to reach out and unable to be free. So why I understand what you mean, I have just come to realize that it is not my circumstances that dictate my outcome it is my attitude towards it that truly makes the difference. What you label as a “general clean” and “spring clean” is same cleaning to me.

mytw♥tatas

March 18th, 2010
9:44 am

I’m with ya, DREAMS on the ongoing effort.

Although… P.R.O.C.R.A.S.T.I.N.A.T.I.O.N… is the most toxic thing in my entire life right now. I’ve always jokingly diagnosed myself with a fear of success cuz I should probably be well on my way to my ladies lunch with Oprah, helping her plan the next Legends ball. Insert Heavy sigh here. (I am gonna finish my essays today Or Else!) Oh and my Spring Training has been delayed by me and the rain. Hush, I know it’s sunny today. Hmmm. Maybe by the time Spring is in full swing I’ll be flirting for real instead of for play-play.

MRS. THEIGH Have “theigh” been there forever like you and just started acting up? Or just a few wretches getttin on your last nerve, accelerating the SAHM scenario?

Dig That

March 18th, 2010
9:47 am

@Swiss
I know they partied in beantown last night.

Carlito

March 18th, 2010
9:47 am

Maintain cleanliness daily and a person will not have to worry about “spring cleaning”.

Hello everyone :)

AmazonRed™

March 18th, 2010
9:49 am

the amazing part of that them is I DON’T QUESTION it and run back out of fear of being alone!!!!!!

Yeah…what’s so bad about being alone anyway? (if you do indeed like yourself)

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 18th, 2010
9:49 am

Morning.

“What are some ways you could spring clean your life?”

I think the best way to spring clean is simple. Just sit down and think and let your phone ring. See who is pursuing you, interested in you, etc.

Actually, I have a google phone and it mistakenly erased quite a bit of my contacts and my Little Black Book! Then it hit me, it is a great time to destroy and rebuild. The dates that go no where, the same stuck up women that try to be coy, the flakeyness etc..That’s getting kinda tired right now.

Also a good way would be to just go through your dating contacts in your phone and check either Destiny or Doom. Im sure all our phones and lives will be alot lighter!

So I made the decision I will just let it happen. I got other stuff going on anyway.

Randyt (aka...time to get that backside out and workout Now)

March 18th, 2010
9:51 am

To jump start my love life I need to get rid of the toxic qualities IN ME that I may have been procrastinating on…not the women I meet. here is my spring cleaning list…and everyone here has my permission to hold me accountable in future blogs.

1) MAKE TIME to walk run, hike, exercise, and eat better evry day and starting today…the days are longer so I have no excuse.
2) Keep house clean enough at all times so I would not be embarassed to invite guests over spontaneously.
3) Find that Honda S2000 I’ve been threatening to buy and just DO IT
4) Get off my recently lazy azz and make romance a mission not a half hearted attempt. Start being (again) the type of SO an SO would want in their lives.
5) Go back and reread 1 – 4.

My point is that the real or perceived problems/solutions in my AND your romantic lives are INSIDE of US, not external…and the spring cleaning needs to be scrubbing ourselves really well..

i'm swiss

March 18th, 2010
9:51 am

@Dig — That they did. Good times, but I’m moving a little slow this morning. ;-)

Willie Dynamite

March 18th, 2010
9:52 am

Morning All,

Good topic. I’d like to ask is this moreso a function of the Thought Process of Women as opposed to Men. I dont mean to turn it into Us vs Them but it seems Dudes dont literally go through this type of thing. I think for the most part (maybe speaking for myself) we dont allow hanger-ons (buddies or chicks) to dampen our outlook. Just my thoughts.

AmazonRed™

March 18th, 2010
9:53 am

Looks like Sandra Bullock is doing some spring cleaning. She found out her husband is cheating. Looks like that Oscar will be the new man in her life!

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20352494,00.html

Lady J-you can’t experiEnce success without failure!!!!!

March 18th, 2010
9:54 am

ARed that is it chica! Partying with J is what i do! Ha!

AmazonRed™

March 18th, 2010
9:55 am

I think for the most part (maybe speaking for myself) we dont allow hanger-ons (buddies or chicks) to dampen our outlook.

So many men aren’t the same after their first heartbreak. Sometimes is changes their attitude about women and love (for the worst) forever. So I’m not so sure about that one.

PrincessNIk

March 18th, 2010
9:56 am

@Randy T
I am with you on 1. & 2. I joined the gym yesterday! now let me add

3. stop being open to people who are draining (fiscally, physically, mentally and/or spiritually)

PrincessNIk

March 18th, 2010
9:58 am

ARed,

I have to agree with your 9:55 i had an ex who never really got over the first girl who broke his heart by choosing someone else over him. I said dude Keyshia Cole said it best “let it go”!

Mrs. Theighforsmeh Tubeeahbych

March 18th, 2010
10:00 am

TwoLincolns, “theigh” have gone too far.

As a strawboss I am a very easy to get along with. Everyone here knows that. But when you start taking my kindness for weakness, that’s when we have a problem.

And the very few times that I have handed out reprimands I hand deliver them. I say what I mean and I mean what I say.

And yeah “theigh” bout to run me outta here. LOL

Willie Dynamite

March 18th, 2010
10:00 am

Ared – you may be right. That 1st heartbreak usually does change our outlook on things. It also means (probably for the worst) that our Spring Cleaning turns into a weekly cleaning. LOL!!!

Lady J-you can’t experiEnce success without failure!!!!!

March 18th, 2010
10:02 am

M. great post

Ladies any of yall heard of this in Atlantic Station…..
Beautiful Hair Atlanta
ATLANTIC STATION
201 17th Street Suite 300
Atlanta, Georgia 30363

I want a beatiful spring wrap! Ha! clipped ends and even a golden rinse or highlights…..I am back @ salon status yall…lol *now when am I going to take thses micro twist out!* LOL

Leggs

March 18th, 2010
10:02 am

Good morning everyone!

I really don’t have anything to say cuz Prof said it all @8:47.

However, I’m very pleased that I don’t have to do any “spring cleaning” of prospects and can move forward and upward without any hurt feelings on his part or mine!

Mrs. Theighforsmeh Tubeeahbych

March 18th, 2010
10:04 am

WillieD, have you never had that one friend that you know was not a good look, but you maintained the friendship anyway? But then one day it hit you that “this dude needs to go”?

Lady J-you can’t experiEnce success without failure!!!!!

March 18th, 2010
10:04 am

dig that attitude is important! I had to change mine bc it was deadly and it only was killing me!

SlimOne on autopilot

March 18th, 2010
10:05 am

Morning Dreams Slim is aight, just a bit SWEEPY today. Can’t wait to catch up on my zz’s this weekend.
Anyone going to the stepshow at the World Congress Center Saturday?

Melo

March 18th, 2010
10:05 am

It’s amazing how many people manage to land jobs managing web sites of major universities without knowing anything at all about web development.

Hey Swiss! How was the St Patrick thang?

Funny u said that coz last saturday at Waffle house,met somebody who said they work in IT for a big company.So I asked them what ERP they use over there and he face lit upnthen blanks :???: and they asked,”ERP?,whats that?”

IT my arse!! :lol:

Blame that on these online certificates and degrees!

coffee!

Lady J-you can’t experiEnce success without failure!!!!!

March 18th, 2010
10:05 am

Leggs that is a priceless feeling!

Luvbug

March 18th, 2010
10:07 am

we dont allow hanger-ons (buddies or chicks) to dampen our outlook.

Willie D – Is that because guys keep every option open? I ask because I know a few guys who seem to never close a door…while still maintaining an upbeat outlook.

upbeat…for lack of a better word because I don’t know if that’s healthy.