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Do dating leagues exist?

I saw the trailer for the film, She’s Out of My League, yesterday and I wondered if “dating league” was making a come back in our dating lexicon.  I hadn’t used the term in ages because I think a lot of single people have become slightly narcissistic enough to think we can date pretty much anyone we want!
Do you think we have huge egos and believe there is no such thing as “in the same league” in terms of who is within our reach?
Have you ever been apprehensive about seeing someone because you thought they were out of your league or vice versa?
If we actually buy in to the theory of dating leagues, what kind of things would  put someone out of your league, so to speak?
How would one really determine the type of person we “deserve” to date?

369 comments Add your comment

Give me my Dayum Hour back (not SlimOne)

March 15th, 2010
8:46 am

Morning! I think Mickey D’s slipped me a decaff because I feel like i’m just sleep walking. Check back in once the caffeine finally hits me

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
9:07 am

i’ll be lurking no this one. good morning all!:)

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
9:07 am

i meant “on.” lol. i’m sleepwalking too slim one.:(

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
9:15 am

Happy last week of winter everyone!

Yes, there are a few trolls out there, thinking they can pull anything. And with the abundance of women in our major cities and the reported lack of eligible men, there are a lot of men who think they can pull any and everyone…with enough beautiful but desperate women saying “yes” to support this thinking.

Anywhoo, I don’t approach men, but I do make myself “open” to being approached. There have been plenty of times I’ve taken myself out of the running before I’m even in. Either there are too many women hanging off his arm, or he’s famous or he’s put to together in a manner which shows me I’m not on his level. You never really know until you try tho.

East Point's Own

March 15th, 2010
9:18 am

I used to think like that when I was younger, but I have learned that most people have something about them that knocks them down to my level, if not lower…LoL meaning Good looking people can be insecure, rich people can be bored or tired of things in their life, tall people can be tired of the lame tall people that they have been dating, popular people can be lonley because nobody really want to get to know them beyond seeing them at the party… So basically for one reason or another there is always a chance that you can relate to any person you are attracted to. And I have also learned that if there is someone who does not like me for who I am, then I am better off not knowing them anyway.

http://hispointofview.com

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 15th, 2010
9:20 am

I think they do. It is not so much a monetary thing, but a cultural thing and it causes problems that can moderate some but are usually hanging there in the background.

I came from the wrong side of the tracks, and graduated from a rural East Tennessee high school. I married a girl from a big city, upper class social strata. I was never embraced by her family. Her mom would make remarks around me thinking that I would not understand because she equated rural with ignorant. It is a shame that “Sweet Home Alabama” had not come out back then because I loved a line from the movie…”honey, just because I talk slow, don’t mean I’m stupid”. My ex mother-in-law never figured that out.

“Have you ever been apprehensive about seeing someone because you thought they were out of your league or vice versa?” Absolutely, still do sometimes. Now I make good money but do not live in fancy digs and drive fancy cars. I am educated and have traveled the world, but I still think that this stigma affects my thinking. If I am on line dating, and I notice if the lady is from Alpharetta, I look at the house she is in. If it looks like a mini-mansion, I just sort of brush it off. They might be fine, but why fight it? I’m dealing with that a little right now with the lady I am seeing. She seems fine about it, but one of her ex-husbands (multiple) owned a big company and I wonder if the lady can handle the step down in lifestyle. Who knows?

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
9:22 am

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
9:23 am

tall people can be tired of the lame tall people that they have been dating,

:shock:

I doubt this seriously! We just go out an find a non lame tall person! :lol:

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
9:31 am

Mornting Gang!

Guess who’s going to see Jill & Max?!!! :)

I can relate to both what Amred & East Point have said. I kinda hate the whole term “out of my league”. It’s as if that person is somehow better than you. I prefer to look at it as that person travels in different circles than you or has a different reality from yours. For example, while I think I can hold my own in any situation – I’m not a Washington insider, a Hollywood power player and I’m not attracted to or desirous of being involved with an athlete. So the chances of hooking up with someone in those circles are slim for me. Whomever I’m with has to fit in my world and I theirs. Part of that is being local and available to date and build a relationship and a family with me. I don’t do long-distance or frequent out-of-town anymore.

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
9:34 am

In the past (meaning long, long, long, long time ago), I have been so impressed by the outer shell of a person that I allowed them make me less confident about who I was. But then I learned better, kinda like EPO said – I eventually realized that we were really on the same level.

I no longer anyone above me. However, there are those that I consider below me based on them being individuals with low morals, involvement in criminal activities and just being really phcked up people in general and so on.

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
9:35 am

Correction:
I no longer consider anyone *above* me.

Dan

March 15th, 2010
9:35 am

Oh please leagues exist who are kidding for both sexes. League criteria is broken down to 1)Looks 2)Money 3)age 4)baggage 5)phyical fitness 6)height

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
9:39 am

Guess who’s going to see Jill & Max?!!!

MEEEEEEEE!!! :mrgreen: :lol:

Have you ever been apprehensive about seeing someone because you thought they were out of your league or vice versa?

No,no and no.

Mornin’ yall!!

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
9:40 am

I’m so excited Sassy!

All I'm Saying Is...

March 15th, 2010
9:43 am

Funny blog posting…yes, definitely ‘leagues’ exist but whether someone is out of your league or not is almost entirely a figment of one’s imagination. For example, if you are a heterosexual guy and you approach a lady with confidence and a sense of humor and don’t let her initial fire shoot you down, then you will have a chance because women are interested in and driven by more than looks—its a biological fact. Don’t get me wrong: you can’t look like Quasimodo but if you practice good hygiene (breath smells good, body smells good, well groomed, etc.), have something to say, a good sense of humor, and some healthy ambition (backed up with financial independence) then you can always go for it and have a good shot at success. See the movie ‘Hitch’ for examples.

Men are hard-wired biologically to go for looks in their mate (and a waist to hip ratio of 70% but I am getting too deep especially for guys) and that’s why this movie is all about a ‘10′ looking lady even considering a ‘5′ looking guy. Some women I have known, in fact, have it as a rule that they seek guys a league or two below them as they feel that they will be less likely to cheat on them.

And this guy in the movie is not really a 5–if he were shorter than her, had a paunchy stomach, and balding hairline, then he’d be a five. I think they want you to believe he’s a five because he appears to be a TSA agent for airport security.

Jeff

March 15th, 2010
9:47 am

Dan, you are the man.. Well said. It’s interesting how many people on here are going to say all options are open but then if you look at those same people’s postings as recently as Friday, they’ll be qualifying their potential mates like a nascar race.

How many women on here have said “I won’t settle!!!”, then today are saying there aren’t leagues?

abc

March 15th, 2010
9:47 am

Considering that someone is ‘out of your league’ is a self-imposed restriction. If someone considers that THEY’RE above YOUR league, let them hang with their own snobby self and their hoity crowd. They all deserve each other’s shallow mess.

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
9:48 am

Okay!?

Kimmie that concert is gonna be the isht! Talk about a grown and sexy weekend ;)

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 15th, 2010
9:52 am

I agree with both Dan and Jeff completely. We all discriminate, and as women get older, security becomes a bigger and bigger issue. Security=money, money seems to be represented by “stuff”, ie. fancy houses, cars, lavish lifestyle, etc., ergo Security = “stuff”, ie. fancy houses, cars, lavish lifestyle, etc.

We don’t like thinking of ourselves as shallow, but actions speak louder than words.

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
9:56 am

thanks Dan for putting it so simply. here is my criteria:
1)Looks–attractive in my eyes
2)Money–got your own money (legal)
3)age–30+
4)baggage–not attached to anyone physically or legally
5)phyical fitness–decent shape, not a walking heart attack
6)height–5′10 or taller

if that is considered a league than that is mine.:)

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
9:56 am

abc – Thank you, well said.

Give me my Dayum Hour back (not SlimOne)

March 15th, 2010
9:57 am

3 words Keep It Shallow lol

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 15th, 2010
10:00 am

One does see exceptions sometimes, but they do not seem to last, i.e. Nikki Taylor out with that normal dude who cradhed his cheap car and almost killed her, Julia Roberts when she married that singer that was uglier than Mick Jagger…but those are exceptions and did not last.

Luvbug

March 15th, 2010
10:02 am

I’ve never considered myself out of someone’s league and never thought about being in someone’s league. I am more likely to question whether we have enough in common to make it, be friends or nothing.

CK9

March 15th, 2010
10:07 am

There are definite leagues… probably perpetuated by the everyone’s high school experience. But I do agree with you…that most people are narcissistic enough to transcend league boundaries anyway now. It makes for a fuller story… the rich one getting with the poor one, the awkward one getting with the suave one, the nerd getting with the hottie, etc.

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
10:09 am

Kinderbabe….can I add to your list…

7.) Not clinically insane or just plain psycho.

8.) D & D free

9.) Colon not swollen (not full of ish)

10.) No prison record!

11.) Intelligent

12.) And most of all….STRAIGHT! :lol:

I prefer men 6ft and taller. However…there appears to be a lack of those here. And those that are tend to have their a$$e$ on their shoulder because they know most women like tall men. I have found in the recent months that shorter men are actually attractive. Now don’t get me wrong upon seeing a tall attractive man I do pay attention. I saw a few in Savannah this weekend (as I got my St. Patty’s drink on)that made a sista say, ” kiss me I’m Irish”! safe to report…no bites on the booty this time. It could have been the tutu I was wearing. But I did get booty smacked! Dayum…I was trying to cover it! :lol: At least they asked first! Now what was I saying…oh yes…I am trying to give the shorter men a chance. Now that does not mean trial size men come approach me. You at least need to be 5′9. At least you are one inceh taller than me barefoot. In heels…oh well. I am not give up my heels for nobody!

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
10:14 am

I prefer men 6ft and taller. However…there appears to be a lack of those here.

:shock:

This is a myth! I haven’t dated a guy under 6′2 since I moved here and I’ve been here 5 years!

Go to Boston, then you can say that. I think the lack of sun stunts their growth! :lol:

Melo

March 15th, 2010
10:15 am

Morning folks!

Call me shallow but leagues do exist and they are real!

Dating outside ur league may result in problems down the road unless ofcourse u have “settled” and/or gone thru a mental make over.

As long as ur association with ur date/wife/hubby/ or whoever does not create problems for urself,ur mate and ur gregarious acquainatances then its all good but if ur associations and friends make ur partner uncomfortable in some way becoz of who she/he is,then that creates potential problems.
While I did not go about asking chics for their qulaifications to check their intelligence, I expected a certain level of comfort with them,other than mere chemistry before I dated them.If that were missing or she conducted herself in a certain way,I obvioulsy discounted her as a potential long term mate,based on my requirements and comfort level with them.

Education is what rubs onto you after the facts are forgotten and education certainly makes edges more round but if ur edges are rough to the extend of making me uncomfortabale,u aint in my league. PERIOD!

If thats not a league, I wonder what one would call it.

And I aint kissing nobody’s butt either! :lol:

MORNING!

:lol: ;lol: :lol:

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
10:17 am

Are we talking *leagues* or *standards* or *preferences*? OR are they all really one and the same?

Luvbug

March 15th, 2010
10:18 am

And I aint kissing nobody’s butt either!

You LIE!! (j/k)

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
10:21 am

BlackMagicWoman–he definitely can’t have a swollen colon! LOL that was a great addition. gotta keep that one.:)

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
10:23 am

Good Morning All,

While I agree this whole status league stuff may still be around. I like what EastPoint and abc said. Yes we discriminate but again if you limit yourself if you pass up a good guy or gal simply because they may like fried chicken while you like quail(still taste like chicken). Besides, the old belief is that opposites attract. Which means as nerdy as I am I will most likely wind up with someone who’s idea of fine entertainment is watching NASCAR and WWE wrestling.(yeah I said it).

itpdude

March 15th, 2010
10:26 am

Yes, leagues do exist. Generally the leagues fall into this: For men, wealth. For women, youth and beauty. When I talk about beauty for women, I mean the body must be fit, tanned, good breasts, very attractive face, etc; if she wants to land a wealthy man.

That is a generalization, but is observable in everyday life in certain segments of the population, particularly in areas like Buckhead or East Cobb.

For the rest of us, it is based on personality and compatability and a reasonable expection of attraction. My new wife is an attractive woman but is not the salon type who needs that pampering attention. Her nails are not long and painted, she doesn’t go crazy on the make-up, isn’t perfumed, doesn’t hi-lite her hair, doesn’t wear heels everyday, etc. Then again, I’m not into the diva type.

If you are into glammed up girls whose only purpose in life seems to be looking “good” and acting like the reality stars, you will need lots of money. But that money will be wasted on a sand-castle. Youth fades and true beauty becomes apparent or the lack thereof becomes sadly apparent.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
10:29 am

Which means as nerdy as I am I will most likely wind up with someone who’s idea of fine entertainment is watching NASCAR and WWE wrestling.(yeah I said it).

A friend of mine sent me a text this weekend. She is a “foodie” and is in love with fine dining. The man she is with thought “scallops” were potatoes. :lol:

She’s happy tho!

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
10:29 am

@Kinder..I like your league list and BlackMagic’s additions..except jail time..I would date someone who has been to the pokey..as long as it was not one of the deadly crimes.

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 15th, 2010
10:29 am

Melo hits on a good point…education. I almost always note whether a lady as a college degree or not, because I want someone in my life who is knowledgeable and intellectually stimulating as well as attractive. There are probably many wonderful ladies who have a lot to offer, but I would not get involved with a lady who only had a high school education or less and would hesitate if only an associates degree. Is that a “League”, no question.

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
10:30 am

William

March 15th, 2010
10:34 am

Women go for looks then have babies and settle for the less goodlooking. OF course If you are wealthy–no rules apply.

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 15th, 2010
10:37 am

I had a work assciate whose son was a student at GA Tech and was interviewed to paticipate on the TV show “Beauty and the Geek”. He did not get on because he actually knew what a French manicure and pedicure were.

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
10:38 am

Kym i’m w/you on that one too. a record isn’t necessarily a deal breaker. it depends on the charges.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
10:39 am

OF course If you are wealthy–no rules apply.

:)

Goodsmack01

March 15th, 2010
10:42 am

I agree with Eastpoint’s Own. I always thought most people were looking to be more and do more with their lives and as it turns out, that’s not always the case. So, the beautiful people you see aren’t always who or what you perceive them to be. Some are insecure, some have a warped perception of what reality is and what life is supposed to be. Some believe they can achieve things without any planning or without putting in the work to accomplish them. Some feel like they are owed certain things and don’t have to do a thing to earn them. Some have some far out ideas about life in general and some are just DUMB! Or as Junior would say Dum b, lol!!

So generally, if you are a reasonably well rounded, secure, self-sufficient, independent type of guy (or girl) with his (or her) own money, place and car, the world (or more aptly, your local community) is your oyster! As long as the person you seek is single and unattached, there’s no reason that person can be yours!

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
10:44 am

Did y’all see that Essence.com article? Apparently 48% of black women have gen.ital he.rpes now. So D&D free may be a tall order these days too.

Dan

March 15th, 2010
10:47 am

Kinderbabe I am 5′8 but willing to wear platform shoes or thicker socks…SexyCool..League, standards or preferences are all the same its just the way its used in a sentence depending on how snobby one wants to feel. I mean come on everyone lets be real and not say the number one thing one is looking for is personality, honesty, trust and love because face it, it is all an illusion fabricated by greeting cards if it wasn’t than divorce, leasing a car, plastic surgery and fitness gyms would not exist.

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
10:48 am

Amazon so does that mean black males have it too? Because genital herpes doesn’t just happen.

DreamsMaterialize

March 15th, 2010
10:48 am

What are we defining as “out of your league”? Is it someone who is socioeconomically “above” you, “beneath” you, or on the same level but into completely different things?

Go to Boston, then you can say that. I think the lack of sun stunts their growth!
I’m a Bostonian…guilty as charged. lol

I would date someone who has been to the pokey..as long as it was not one of the deadly crimes.
And as long as they weren’t doing the “pokey” while they were there right? lol

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
10:48 am

I’m skeptical of the numbers on herpes. The same companies that make the tests to detect herpes are the same ones that sell the meds to *treat* it.

From my inner conspiracy theorist…

CoolShadow

March 15th, 2010
10:51 am

Leagues are self-imposed, truly arbitrary and personalized so-called standards that are used by some people to distinguish themselves from others. Generally the metrics used are external factors such as looks and money. Growing up, there were times I may have felt a girl was out of my league because she may have been popular, pretty and relatively speaking she came from money. When my maturity began to increase while my insecurities decreased, I realized some women did this because of their insecurities and shallowness. In this society I think people like class structures so they can look down on others in order to feel better about themselves, regardless of the metrics used to distinguish themselves.

These days I don’t worry about being out someone’s league, but I do evaluate the persona that a woman’s trying to project and if I sense a myopic attitude or shallowness from her, I may back off without trying to approach.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
10:52 am

Amazon so does that mean black males have it too? Because genital herpes doesn’t just happen.

Yes, but they didn’t state the numbers for them. Apperently it’s easier for us to get it then it is for us to give it. So the numbers are probably smaller for the men, but the article didn’t state what they were.

Oh and 80% of the women who have it, don’t know they have it.

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
10:56 am

Good morning. Lil Leggs came in 3rd out of 6 in the 300 Hurdles.

Love your post, RandyT.

Of course leagues exist. Let’s take a very simple example….this blog. If posts aren’t worded right, shown that enough intellectual thought was put in and words used properly, you may not even get noticed. Same thing for dating. How you carry yourself, how your confidence comes across,and how you speak no doubt places you in a particular slot to the person you’re conversing with. Diversity is needed when dating. I would think no one really wants to start anew with another who hasn’t culturally afforded themselves to learn and seek at least some of what life has to offer. There are many leagues and it’s up to that person to have the confidence to conquer whatever it is they want, even slaying that man/woman in the $6.5 million dollar home (well it happens on tv…lol)!

Give me my Dayum Hour back (not SlimOne)

March 15th, 2010
10:56 am

Ared “Oh and 80% of the women who have it, don’t know they have it.”

Um…call me crazy, or maybe I just haven’t woken up yet, but if the chicks don’t know they have it…how in the hayo do the folks who did this survey know they have it? LOL!

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
10:57 am

Slim, who knows? :lol:

I think they take a sample, and then apply it to the general population. Kinda like Neilson ratings. :lol:

i'm swiss

March 15th, 2010
10:59 am

Morning all.

All I can say is that luckily for us guys, most women are interested in more than looks. So, as long as you do the best you can with what you’ve got and — most importantly — are comfortable and confident in who you are then you’ve got a chance. I’m a perfect case-in-point. Based on looks alone, Mrs. Swiss is way out of my league. Luckily for me, I’m completely comfortable being a dorky whiteboy, so that didn’t stop me from approaching. :lol: Confidence can go a looooooong way.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
11:03 am

swiss – :lol:

Did you ever tell us how you and Swiss Mrs. met?

LL411

March 15th, 2010
11:03 am

Have you ever been apprehensive about seeing someone because you thought they were out of your league or vice versa? NEVER :)

I have a girlfriend who worries over this non-sense…

LeeH1

March 15th, 2010
11:04 am

This is part of the reason why so many women aren’t married- it is easier for a man to marry someone below their league than it is for a woman to do so. Thus, many black professional women won’t date a man who is still blue collar- the men are not there who are in the same league, and thus they cry about the lack of suitable men.

But the men are there. The women would just prefer to stay single than marry a man who does manual labor.

NOKD- “Not Our Kind, Darling”

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
11:07 am

Confidence can go a looooooong way.

Swiss – You said a mouthful! That’s the thing I have that I am most thankful for. I consider myself very blessed. My parents provided me with the best they had to offer – a stable upbringing, good genes, and a great education and a belief in myself that I can achieve anything I set out to do. They taught me to get anything in life you have to prepare and plan and do the work. I have all the tools to face the world with confidence! It has taken me far and given me many options.

DreamsMaterialize

March 15th, 2010
11:08 am

how in the hayo do the folks who did this survey know they have it?
This can be estimated in different ways. Consider the percentage of women who are diagnosed with herpes when they go to the doctor. Then consider the percentage of women who do not regularly see a doctor. If you make the assumption (maybe a good or bad one) that women who don’t see a doctor are exposed to similar sexual risks as those who see a doctor regularly, then you can make a case that those who don’t see a doctor would be diagnosed with herpes at the same rate (same percentage) as those who do see a doctor. This would be one way to estimate it.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
11:10 am

Slim – What Dreams said. :lol:

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
11:11 am

LeeH1 – I totally disagree. Every blue-collar guy I know has absolutely no trouble attracting women. I’m not talking other “blue collar” women either, very many are married to or date professional women. Most women would just be happy with someone that is gainfully employed and many blue collar professions pay more that white collar. So that whole notion is a myth & over-simplification.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
11:15 am

I’m not talking other “blue collar” women either, very many are married to or date professional women

kimmie – This has been my experience too.

One of my friends is an environmental engineer. She married a UPS driver.

He’s fine tho and treats her like a Queen. :D

lurker

March 15th, 2010
11:15 am

Without all the fancy words, it’s just dang ignorance to believe or buy into someone being better….better anything or better everything. However, it exists. There are those folks who aren’t willing to make an effort toward relating because of money or the lack thereof, looks or the lack thereof, status or the lack thereof. And even though it may be something you don’t prescribe to because I certainly don’t, I think you’re walking with blinders to say folks don’t buy into that mentality. I think it’s even sadder if you allow such buffoonery.

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
11:15 am

@Dan…LOL. i’m not sure that will help.:)

lurker

March 15th, 2010
11:17 am

I always heard growing up to date an ugly or less than desirable man as they’re treat you royally.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
11:17 am

ooogh,we onto herpes now,this early in the morn,coz Ared is baaaack and this is her fav topic?? :lol: :lol:

it is easier for a man to marry someone below their league than it is for a woman to do so

I agree with u altho a lot of them females are fronting,talking like they dont know what “league” is!

wait until u approach them,first thing they do when they hear ur accent is frown :lol: or look down at ur shoes and if u aint rocking their fav or to their expectaions,they dont even acknowledge u! :lol:

And same pple are saying now they dont do leagues :???:

Sometimes Women are just so hard to understand! :lol:

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
11:19 am

Hmmmm…doesn’t this ‘league’ label carry a sense of arrogance along with it? Does this mean relationships will have challenges just because a guy is a teacher/truck driver/factory worker and a woman is ‘professional’? That seems kind of shady!

Give me my Dayum Hour back (not SlimOne)

March 15th, 2010
11:21 am

Slim now looking at Dreams like a dog who is trying to figure out what you mean by roll over. Head tilted sideways going huh? LOL!

@Dreams Um..okay…thanks for breaking that down.

Tazzee - 60 days til Mrs.

March 15th, 2010
11:23 am

Morning folks!!!

DreamsMaterialize

March 15th, 2010
11:24 am

Socioeconomic, educational circles would exist even if none of us endorsed them. If you grow up in a certain neighborhood, go to certain churches, attend certain schools, are active in certain organizations, indulge in certain extracurricular activities, then you will tend to seek out similar people because you can more easily relate to them. You may not have any intention of excluding anyone, but people who aren’t seeking you out will tend to exclude themselves, just as you probably exclude yourself from other circles because you aren’t seeking them out.

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
11:24 am

Hey Tazzie Mae! How was the run?

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
11:26 am

Melo – It’s not politically correct to say someone is out of your league. That would be like looking down your nose at someone and most of us are regular good people out here just trying to make it. I’m educated and a professional, but I’m not banking anywhere near what some of my classmates are. There’s a trade-off for success a lot of times. I’m in no position to look down my nose at anyone and I’m not that kind of person. I’ve always been attracted to intelligence so that usually comes with education. I’ve just never run into a high school dropout that could peak my interest intellecually. He wouldn’t typically travel in my circles. Even blue-collar men I know are skilled and can carry a decent conversation about current events. Just the way it is. Not really hard to understand.

Mo (aka Moeisha )

March 15th, 2010
11:27 am

Just popping in for a sec everyone! Hope ya’ll are having a great one!

SlimOne – i like the longer days but this year losing that hour has dayum near killed me! GEESH!

I’ll talk with you guys later, got a busy day ahead…SIGH!

i'm swiss

March 15th, 2010
11:27 am

ARed — That depends on who you ask. She would tell you that we met “through friends.” But the truth is that we met online. I’m still waiting for an offer to be in one of those commercials… :lol:

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
11:28 am

Dreams – Well said, I like your 11:24.

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
11:31 am

Lurker…you marry that ulgy man…you are seeting up your kids for the downfall. :lol: Both of my late grandpas told us not to marry an ugly man because they do not want any ugly grandkids! Although I do not want kids…I look at a man’s features before we get involved. If we were to marry and an accident occured and I get pregnant…I need to know my kid will be attractive. Let’s face it…being attractive in this world get’s you a lot farther.

My reason for not dating a guy with a record is because he is most likely not going to have a good job. I mean you get discrimated against for your credit…but if you are an excon….you are almost screwed with NO grease!

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
11:31 am

Sup Melo and the rest of the MIA crew!

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
11:33 am

But the truth is that we met online. I’m still waiting for an offer to be in one of those commercials…

Swiss – Nice!

And those commericals are funny. They always feature “typical” couples, same race, the man taller than the other, same general age.

That’s not the only kind of hookups going on on those sites! :lol:

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
11:33 am

I think the leagues exist:

There is a guy that I was interested in. I’m out of his league because he is looking for a jump off and I’m not the one.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
11:33 am

Melo – It’s not politically correct to say someone is out of your league

@Kimmie!

thank u for saying that. I wonder why foljks are so scared ,timid :???: to say or acknowldge what seems like common practice in every day lyfe.

This league thang,call it by whatever name,is practiced every second,hour,day by most people!

DreamsMaterialize

March 15th, 2010
11:33 am

Head tilted sideways going huh?
Slim Sorry… :-( lol

Melo

March 15th, 2010
11:35 am

almost screwed with NO grease!

ouch! :lol:

thats gotta hurt!

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
11:35 am

Question:

the infamous ex texted me Sat. night asking to meet up on Sun (I’m assuming he wants his key back)
I told him i was busy (this is true)
but now, I’m kinda ticked he texted. I had forgotten about him up till now, I honestly don’t want to hear from him

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 15th, 2010
11:38 am

When I was a freshman in college, I started dating a gal. She joined a sorority and I did not join a fraternity. When she broke it off, her words were, “I really like you, but my sorority sisters would look down on me for not dating a fraternity boy”. First really big encounter with “leagues”. (I did suggest a physically impossible place she could stick her “Greeks”).

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
11:41 am

Well said kimmie!!!

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
11:46 am

@ Randy, I bet she’s still single wondering why she let you get away.

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
11:47 am

“There is a guy that I was interested in. I’m out of his league because he is looking for a jump off and I’m not the one.”

Well said, i am!

And, if you don’t want to hear from him remove his number or as has been stated here, put a DNA next to his number (doubt it will help, but it might).

Give me my Dayum Hour back (not SlimOne)

March 15th, 2010
11:50 am

Well since Randy brought it up, for the Greeks on the blog, is that a big deal to date a non-greek?

Jeff

March 15th, 2010
11:50 am

I think I’ve finally found a way to verbalize what I see in single people today (and some married folk):

We have different personalities depending on the situation:
Professional during the week.
Diva/Playa on Friday/Sat night.
To the 9’s at church on Sunday.
In my jersey Sun afternoon for the game.
And whatever in between.

Is it no wonder people don’t take us seriously for a long term deal because they see us changing our stripes multiple times a week? Why would you be committed to me for life when you can’t even commit your style for one week? Just a thought.

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
11:51 am

And I will mention the this all of those looking down your noses at anyone…the current economic situation has proven we all at any time can be one paycheck from homeless. I hear everyday of people working great jobs..only to be let go, run out of unemployment(it is not forever) and then burn thru savings..just trying to survive. I have watched many a tail fall off of folks shoulders.

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
11:53 am

Leggs! Sup lady!
I deleted dudes number last month and never added it back.
I was in the middle of texting someone else (guy) when he texted.
he was the last person in the world I expected to hear from.
I don’t even know why I responded

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
11:54 am

oh Leggs, I deleted his message the same day I received it

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
11:54 am

Kym – Okay!! A lot of folks are having a tough time. Never know, the one you’re looking down on now you might need to ask for help from down the line.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
11:56 am

And I will mention the this all of those looking down your noses at anyone…the current economic situation has proven we all at any time can be one paycheck from homeless. I hear everyday of people working great jobs..only to be let go, run out of unemployment(it is not forever) and then burn thru savings..just trying to survive. I have watched many a tail fall off of folks shoulders.

HERE HERE!

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
11:57 am

Jeff, what you wrote makes absolutely no sense. What you’re describing is common sense. What I wear to the club Friday night is not appropriate for work or church. Now if I looked like I going to the nightclub every day of the week, for every occasion, then I’d have a problem.

How about committing to the appropriate style for the appropriate occasion? Is that a turn-off?

Melo

March 15th, 2010
12:00 pm

the current economic situation has proven we all at any time can be one paycheck from homeless.

@kYM!!

And thats why im a lil happy with todays’ headline about rising foreclosures in Atlanta as per ajc. Im looking forward to making a great real estate deal/buy in the prime cbd area,where ordinarily,the real estate gougers would have run me out! :lol:

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
12:02 pm

random thoughts:
What am I supposed to pick up at the store again?
My hair looks like it is getting healthy, I love the new products I have been using.

Jeff

March 15th, 2010
12:03 pm

I think it’s when the person doing it is so obviously “colon swollen” that it becomes ridiculous. I get what you’re sayin. Somehow, I don’t think you’re the type I’m speakin to.

But I can’t expect a woman to take me seriously as a lifetime mate when I’m walking around drenched in my thug-ness and then try to show up for church Sunday morning acting like I got the faith. Same goes the other way.

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
12:03 pm

Jeff – all that you described just sounds like a well-rounded, multi-faceted individual.

No one wants to be around someone who is the same way all the time. So what are you saying? That you would expect someone to wear a suit and tie to a Falcons game just because they are an attorney?

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
12:05 pm

random thought: I am really digging my hair!

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
12:07 pm

What you plan on doing in the CBD, Melo??

@i am ~ you answered cuz you wanted to. Bottom line. You wanted to see if by hearing his voice some type of giddiness, nervousness, disgust or plain indifference would take over. Hope you got your answer.

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
12:08 pm

@Melo

For those of us who are among the employed we have to be most thankful everyday. Believe me..what is going on with others we come into contact is not pretty. There are many who are struggling and not sure where their next quarter is coming from. Hell I am am trying to stay afloat myself. Grocery prices going up and my kid insist on eating.

Jeff

March 15th, 2010
12:09 pm

What I’m sayin is I can’t expect a woman to take me seriously as a lifetime mate when I’m in my thug-ness one day and then showing up a church Sun acting like I got the faith.

But I get your point. I’m talking about the extremes that you see when you know they’re “colon swollen” (I’m gonna steal that).

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
12:12 pm

Leggs: didn’t hear his voice: he sent text.
Also I was typing a text to someone when his text popped up
Scared the beejesus out of me.
I called a friend before responding.
So if anything, the text did confirm I don’t have feelings.

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
12:14 pm

@i am ~ sorry, you did say text. I would think you calling a friend to ask whether you should respond confirmed your feelings.

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
12:14 pm

Random thought:

I really want to go back to church but when I did go, it was money this and money that, and I am still trying to figure out what cause they were needing the money for.
I was very turned off my the “motivational” video of the pastor in his house, overlooking the pool in front of the baby grand piano talking about how much more we can do if we all commit to pledge $200-$300/month

…time for me to find a new church

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
12:15 pm

typo: my = by

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
12:16 pm

Leggs: I new how I felt, I just wanted to know whether or not to respond. I should have listened to my gut and just ignored

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
12:18 pm

…time for me to find a new church

:idea: Keep visiting churches til you find one that “fits.” Like anything else in life.

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
12:20 pm

I am – I disagree. The text confirms that he can still knock you off balance a bit. And that’s okay. Getting over someone doesn’t happen overnight. Once you become indifferent to a text when it comes through, that’s when you’ll know you’re really over it. Until then, it’s just a part of life. You don’t have to prove anything to anyone by declaring the state of your feelings. Just let sht flow and take it as it comes.

That being said…while I can appreciate the technological advances that this day and age has brought to us. Iam’s dilemma brings up an unwanted consequence to the advance of tools like voice mail and text messages.

When it comes to JUST a phone call, you don’t have to answer. You can better control a person’s intrusion into your existence/thoughts, etc. With something like a text message, they are just there and it’s not quite as easy to ignore.

And I’m sure I could type more to make this a more complete thought, but…I think ya’ get what I’m saying.

Goodsmack01

March 15th, 2010
12:28 pm

I am….. if you’re over the X, then what’s the problem…… if it’s his key he wants, mail it back to him or drop it over his mom’s, sister, brother……. aunt, uncle,or cousin’s place and move on. Hanging on to it, only shows you’re still hung up on the dude and refusing to let go…… if it’s not a problem, you’d be chumping at the bit to return whatever it is you have of his.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
12:31 pm

Leggs?

Im looking for a deal at the right price. I looked at some property 2 weeks back but it didnt seem right,accoring to my situation and then saw some thing better the follwing week..todays headline makes me think the prices are going lower so the bottom aint here yet!

Im still hopeful for a steal! and really happy about that.

@Kym

A lot of folks took helocs to finance furniture and blink which they didnt have to and others boght waaaay more house than they cld afford just to show off.

Its coming back to bite their azzes.

I have a sister in law that boght a nice house in suwanee..she was a mortgage broker and used fake stuff and other mortgage shenanegands to get there….all that came down tumbling on her…sucker indeed. And she was one of those who wld say,”oh,so and so aint in my league”

No political correct talk for her! :lol:

I dont have sympathy for folks who take on those risks coz really, investment,whether in a home or otherwise,entails risk.

U gotta know that be4 going in.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
12:32 pm

I AM – I received 3 text messages from someone that I had a HUGE falling out with a couple of years ago and he’s pretty much been “around” for the last year. When I say been around, I even caught his voice in my voicemail while out on vacation but I don’t think he realized his voice was caught….I have never said anything about…just kept it moving. While I can say he got waaaay under my skin and I have been strong enough to resist and not acknowledge anything in the last year, the 3 text messages were about the most direct thing he’s done in the last year…that was about a month ago. When I got the text messages I responded but not the way he probably thought I would. While he never acknowledged it being “him”, I know it was. I think he did it like that because he wasn’t sure how I’d respond. First was “can we meet”, next was “we just need to talk and work things out” and lastly “it is important we stay friends.” I was taken aback a bit and honestly want to talk but because he’s gotta do better with that approach. We aren’t kids. I only responded asking the person to let me know who it was but I wouldn’t bite. I have a hunch he’s not gone but looking for another avenue in approaching. But I too found out, I still have feelings.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
12:34 pm

“but because he’s gotta do better with that approach, I ain’t budging”

should have been the entire statement.

Goodsmack01

March 15th, 2010
12:35 pm

Iam……. you must be fairly young…… I would encourage you to go to bible study if you don’t already……….. I’m not sure what the nature of the “giving” is but if it’s paying tithes….. I’ll tell you, you’ll have to become more comfortable about the issue of money and church. The Bible says 10%, you’re obligated to that……..anything beyond that is optional…

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
12:37 pm

Kindly please stop stealing my catchphrase…..”Swollen colon”! Thank you! :lol: I’m just kidding! It’s funny to hear/read somebody else saying it! I am so creative I tell ya! :lol:

Randy…it’s good thing that that sorority girl dumped you. You wouldn’t want a girl who can’t think for herself or who doesn’t know when to tell somebody to mind their own business and kizz their a$$ now would you?

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
12:43 pm

Goodsmack01…I’d rather give my money to an organization where I can see it work. I do not like going to churches because I do not need a sermon telling me constantly. But then says God loves a cheerful giver. Hwo can I be cheerful if going to church is like going to a club. If I feel like I can’t go to church because I have no money there is a problem. Cheerful would be if I gave because I felt it to do so in my heart..not because the plate goes around 3 times and I feel pressured to donate. It bothers me to see a pastor in a $2,000 suit who keeps speaking of tithing to a congregation who is worried about I know I need to pay my power bill, car note, rent, etc…..but I need to tithe. I understand tithing is a sacrifice…but some things are common sense. You can’t give what you don’t have. Try telling GA power you can’t pay them because you paid tithes. I guess candlelight isn’t so bad huh!

lurker

March 15th, 2010
12:46 pm

You can’t give what you don’t have….

I disagree. You have because God gave/gives. If you have a job, it was the blessing of God. You should NATURALLY, out of gratitude give back. The more you give (to God), the more you stand to get. Your problem should never be the preacher and what’s he’s getting or doing with the money. You’re gift of tithes is to God. If the pastor does wrong by the money, he becomes accountable to God.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
12:47 pm

The scripture takes you even further…give as you prosper.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
12:49 pm

I do not like going to churches because I do not need a sermon telling me constantly.

Hwo can I be cheerful if going to church is like going to a club.

It bothers me to see a pastor in a $2,000 suit who keeps speaking of tithing to a congregation who is worried about I know I need to pay my power bill, car note, rent, etc…..but I need to tithe.

Excuses
Excuses
Excuses

So find a church that does none of the above. They’re out there.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
12:52 pm

Your problem should never be the preacher and what’s he’s getting or doing with the money

Can I have some money 4 lunch Lurker??(u be giving to me not but to God) :lol:

I agree with u BlackMagicWoman,give to a charity of ur choice than to somebody’s church that u dont agree with.

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
12:58 pm

I prefer to give my money elsewhere that does actually help people. I do tithe when I go. I have visited many churches and not one really keeps my interest. The only one that does a even a wee bit is First Baptist. I like a pastor who I can understand. Screaming and singing your words does not drive them home any better. Just speak….I get it! And each song should not be 15 minutes long….all 5 of them! I’m a singer but good grief….just sing the song and move on. I think the one thing I like about Mass in the Catholic church…I am finished in an hour. No time for my ADD to kick in. There is no reason for 2 hours + services. I get so bored I forgot the message. I study different religions and they have some valid points and some (I know this was made up by man because it makes no sense) points!

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:02 pm

Screaming and singing your words does not drive them home any better. Just speak….I get it! And each song should not be 15 minutes long….all 5 of them!

I don’t like those churches either. So I don’t go to them. *shrugs*

My church starts at 11 and is out by 1, which is two hours.

I don’t do the excuses thing. Church was something I chose to commit to, so I kept searching til I found the right fit.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:03 pm

I prefer to give my money elsewhere that does actually help people.

And it’s funny how one thinks the church doesn’t do this. :lol:

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
1:05 pm

i am sorry to hear that some have had negative experiences w/churches and their purpose. i recently (in the past 10 years) have become involved with a church and the practice of tithing. i never looked at it as giving money to “the church” but instead keeping the good that has been giving to me circulating. there are very real needs that my church has like a mortgage, electricity, gas, etc. there is also a wonderful staff we have that needs to be paid. i am proud to say that i am helping to keep that going so that we can continue to reach out to our community and beyond. tithing is simply a way of acknowledging the source not keeping someone’s pockets lined. giving to charities is also a great way to give of your time, resources and talent.

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
1:06 pm

I don’t have a problem with tithes.
I do have a problem with someone dictating that we should be giving $200-$300 per month without directly telling me where the money is going all the while stating their point from a photo shoot taken outside their house overlooking their crystal clear pool with the preacher in front of the baby grand piano.
WTF?

Melo

March 15th, 2010
1:07 pm

United Methodist down the roadby my house is out in 45 minites. I grew up united methodist..

I dont like the 1 hr + messages either.Then the extra hanging around stuff..good grief..

Thats why dont go to church that much…..

Thas my EXCUSE…

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
1:13 pm

At this stage of the game you are old enough to date who ever wants to date you.. Yeah some chicks think their ish doesnt stink when their bout a buck 05 soaking wet, attitudes are terrible and arent quality babes because they are so black and ugly on the inside the outside doesnt even matter.. You have to overlook them dumb broads.. The vast majority of women out there who are mature understand that at the age we are now.. If a person treats you the way you need to be treated then all the rest will fall into place. People are soooo caught up on superficial ish but it all shakes out in the end and who will be for you will be..

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
1:14 pm

@I am…i agree. no one should dictate what you do w/your resources.

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
1:18 pm

As far as church tithes go.. You give to your church and if they miss use the funds its their soul that has to deal with that not yours because you were faithful with your tithes.. I actually used to feel the same way but when I started to go to Beulah I felt ok with giving the money because it always came back somehow during the week.. Or shall I say the Lord provided..

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
1:19 pm

Oh yeah Hey Everybody!!

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:19 pm

Thas my EXCUSE…

Yup, sure is.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
1:21 pm

Amen to that 1:18

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
1:22 pm

@Infamous…i agree. whenever you give to someone or something, it’s up to them to deal w/how they use it. fortunately, my church is open about how they spend money and what it’s for. all i can do is trust that they are being truthful. as you said, if not, that’s up to them to deal with. i have done my part.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:23 pm

Infamous sounds bitter as hell in his 1:13. Someone give him some Xanax or something. :lol:

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
1:23 pm

If a person treats you the way you need to be treated then all the rest will fall into place. People are soooo caught up on superficial ish but it all shakes out in the end and who will be for you will be..

Dat’s di trut ya chattin’ Rude Boi….seen?! ;)

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
1:24 pm

I do believe in giving and I do give when I can but $200-$300 is way out of my budget..
I just don’t like the pressure to give what I don’t have.

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
1:24 pm

Dumb Girl.. Shut it up.. That was for you my love..

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
1:27 pm

Random thought:

Shyt don’t stink til you stir it up so why bother?…. :???:

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:27 pm

No shyt Shirlock. You’re the one still concerned about me month after month.

Funny thing is…with all this venom you spit towards me, you have the nerve to talk about attitude. How do you think you look everytime you focus on attempts to disrespect me.

Common sense for $200 Alex. :lol:

lurker

March 15th, 2010
1:27 pm

Amen Sassy…PLEASE DON’T FEEL THE TROLL!

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
1:28 pm

@Iam…i understand that totally. you know your budget and what is required to meet your responsibilities. being a cheerful giver is key. it took me some years to work my way up to literally giving 10% of what i make. had to clear out some things (debt) that were keeping me from “freeing” up 10% of my budget. whatever you give, give it with love.:)

Melo

March 15th, 2010
1:28 pm

@Infamous, I think its misuse for a pastor to be rich on congregants money!

bentleys,beemas,jets and designer suits on congregants pityful money!

HELL NAW

I wld rather be blind and stupid,

Than have eye Vision but be Blind and Stupid!

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:29 pm

Shyt don’t stink til you stir it up so why bother?….

Maybe I should change my screen name to “Obsession.” :lol:

We were having a lovely blog day weren’t we, Sassy. ;)

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
1:30 pm

Batty Broad.. Please.. I do this for kicks and giggles.. You put it out there so you have to be able to take it.. Sweetheart.. Its a great day to F with ARED.. I dunno.. I know what it is I love you.. I love your stankin a$$

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
1:32 pm

Also, I don’t feel that giving always has to be in the $$$ form.
I get great joy in donating my used clothes, furniture, baby items, etc..
I love watching the recipients faces light up.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:32 pm

What I put out there is all a figment of your delusional mind, Infamous. But keep going, again you just look foolish, which was never a stretch :lol: . No one was even talking to you or about you today, and you come in thinking of me.

I’ll keep up the good work. :D

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
1:33 pm

….going on nap….

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
1:34 pm

I think life has made me very cynical. I am am weary of a lot of things and now question everything I was taught to believe! I can really see how someone can become Atheist. Not that I am…but I understand. I know I get tired of people thinking Pastors are the know all of everything. Your Pastor can not help you if you are clinically depressed, or schizophrenic, Bipolar, etc. I think I am just weary of all the faith and belief that is supposed to be into a made man organization.

I feel a spiritual relationship is personal. A person can go to church every Sunday for service…every Wednesday night for bible study and still be the biggest hypocrites. I have seen the Devil with my own eyes quote scriptures. So that goes to show perfect attendance and all the accompanies it does not make you any closer to God than the one who prays often. Do what they can to help others and truly gives from their heart even when they hardly have it to give. I find that Hosea feed the hungry sticks out to me and that is where I like to give my money, or to St. Jude’s because it helps kids…regardless of their parents ability to pay for the most part.

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
1:35 pm

How in the world did ya’ll get on tithing? You can tithe without having a church home..giving back to others does not have to be monetary. I really can’t bring myself to believe that the Higher Powers have time to keep a running total of how much you give or don’t give and to what church.

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
1:36 pm

It’s interesting to see the various viewpoints regarding the church. It’s interesting to see how we are willing to stay at concerts, sporting events and plays begging for more time and entertainment, while the church must be done in an hour.

It’s interesting to see how we want to regulate what Pastors do with their income even when many of them give money, cars and rent/mortgage payments to many of their members. Should there be a cap on the income of pastors who function as the leader of entities that operate in a business fashion?

Do you regulate your doctor’s income? Do you regulate your lawyer’s income? Do you want anyone regulating what you need to do with your pre-established income?

No need to generalize ALL ministers/preachers based on some of the mistakes and rumors of some.

There is liberation in the principle of sowing and reaping. There is liberation in the principle of giving.

The alternative that is available is to NOT give which many choose to select. God’s Word tells us that He enjoys a cheerful giver. If you aren’t cheerful, then hold your $$$.

on another note – Most churches hold ‘church meetings’ that allow you to walkthrough the church budget in detail. All you have to do is attend.

Okay…I’m done!

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:37 pm

I think life has made me very cynical. I am am weary of a lot of things and now question everything I was taught to believe!

Life can do that sometimes, BlackMagic! We do the best we can with the cards we’re given.

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
1:38 pm

No one can pressure me into giving that which I do not have. I tithe what fits my wallet. My duty is to tithe and what they do with the funds will be something they have to reckon with God. You take care of your end and God will take care of the back end (jokey jokes, Melo)!

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
1:38 pm

Illiogical Idiot.. Yes I’ll keep toying with you.. You Laughable Loon.. If you kiss me girl I’ll kiss you back.. I told you I love your stankin A$$.. The good thing is we think of each other all the time.. Read you in a minute you Baby.. ;-)

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:39 pm

No one can pressure me into giving that which I do not have.

Leggs – That’s why I like my Pastor. He makes a brief mention of our obligation at the time, then often he’ll say but do NOT put in the rent money, or the baby’s milk money, just to say you’ve tithed! :lol:

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
1:40 pm

I meant NO JOKEY JOKES, MELO!!

lurker

March 15th, 2010
1:40 pm

And another AMEN to that 1:36. I think it bears repeating.

It’s interesting to see how we are willing to stay at concerts, sporting events and plays begging for more time and entertainment, while the church must be done in an hour. It’s interesting to see how we want to regulate what Pastors do with their income even when many of them give money, cars and rent/mortgage payments to many of their members. Should there be a cap on the income of pastors who function as the leader of entities that operate in a business fashion? Do you regulate your doctor’s income? Do you regulate your lawyer’s income? Do you want anyone regulating what you need to do with your pre-established income?

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
1:40 pm

If you have a proven pastor and he gets the numbers of the church up when the doors were about to close then he should be compensated.. Now do he need a Bentley or a private jet?? Naw not really..

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:42 pm

If you kiss me girl I’ll kiss you back..

Uh…again…no one was talking about you or thinking of you today. Who peed in your Cheerios this morning? Apperently you just need someone to bully.

Cuz last week you were all about ignoring me. How quickly things change. Po thang. Pick a side and personality, please. :lol:

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
1:44 pm

Have we now put worship on the level of entertainment? Comparing it to movies/concerts/ballgames?

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
1:44 pm

it’s always interesting to hear that tithing doesn’t have to be in the form of money but it’s the first thing that we want more of…lol. give as you would want to be given.

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
1:46 pm

Look here..I know folks who will tithe on Sunday and kick a hobo on Monday..paying your tithe and going to church do not the righteous make..nor is it the key to some good fortune and wealth. It is really all about personal relationship..

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
1:48 pm

I felt like F’n with you today.. I F with you when I feel like it and when I dont I ignore you.. I love it. The bully cant take it when you hit em in the mouth and you my dear are getting punched in the mouth live on the blog.. I only spank you cause I love you my dear.. I have to decipline you for your tomfoolery.. Dont worry I’ll be ignoring you in about 13 more minutes at 2:00 then I’ll mess with you again around 3.. Ok.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
1:48 pm

doctors and corporations etc are for profit entities

so are pastors??…..I didnt realize that altho it is apparent based on their lyfestyles!.

No wonder i dont give those suckers money…

Leeches!

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:48 pm

kick a hobo tho? :lol:

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
1:48 pm

@SexyC ~ believe they’re only comparing the amount of “time” we’re willing to give. No one quibbles over standing on their feet for 4 hours at a concert, screaming at the top of their lungs for an encore, but to sit in church for more than 1.5 makes some antsy and even get a little ticked that Jesus hasn’t left the building.

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
1:48 pm

KP–i attend the kind of church that is very open about where the money goes. tithing is an act of giving back to the source of our supply. sometimes i think we get to caught up in what’s happening to the money. would God stop supplying us w/money knowing how much of it is spent trivially?? lol i’m glad that’s not the case b/c of lot of us would have parched pockets.

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
1:49 pm

Tithing doesnt have to be money you can tithe your time or your talents.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:50 pm

you my dear are getting punched in the mouth live on the blog..

Uh…no I am not. How is that determined anyway, but saying silly ish to me? Come on man…MAKE SENSE.

And what a thing to be proud of if I were. You need a life. :lol:

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
1:52 pm

PAstors arent supposed to be in it for the money but at the end of the day their soul will be required in hell for doing that dirt. You cant worry about what the preacher is doing, just find a church that you feel comfortable being in and the word touches you the way you need to hear it. Do what your heart tells you to do and the rest will be ok..

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
1:54 pm

“…find a church that you feel comfortable being in and the word touches you the way you need to hear it.”

Yes indeed, yes indeed. And that right there is why I don’t mind traveling to my church’s destination and truly miss when I can’t make it.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
1:54 pm

The point is, in bringing up entertainment is that we never tire of doing those things we want for hours or days at a time but to give a little of you time to attend church has become such a inconvenience. I tell you though, funny how we make jokes about God and giving and remarks about clergymen but God is ALWAYS the first we call upon in the time of trouble. I tell, he ain’t exactly happy about that either. It doesn’t please him to call or pray when you need him and things aren’t right but when you’re up and thriving and life is good the question is always God who? He ain’t happy with that I tell ya.

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
1:55 pm

Do what your heart tells you to do and the rest will be ok..

Plain and simple….

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
1:56 pm

Well…I don’t stand at a concert for four hours m’self. And since I talk to Jesus everyday, I don’t need to be in church for hours on end just to prove I know Him.

I’m way more concerned with the fact that He hears from me often enough to recognize my voice when I call Him rather than log in a certain number of hours in a building somewhere.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
1:56 pm

I tell you though, funny how we make jokes about God and giving and remarks about clergymen but God is ALWAYS the first we call upon in the time of trouble.

Whew…we having Church up in here. Which is good, cuz I did indeed miss service this past Sunday. :lol:

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
1:58 pm

Drop $50 to get into a Diddy All-White party
Drop $300 on a bar tab at the club
Drop $100+ to get into a Jay Z, Maxwell or Jill Scott concert

Drop $5 into the church offering and get mad about it…LOL

If you don’t feel comfortable at your church…find a new one as has been stated. There are churches that teach (meaning they don’t whoop). There are smaller churches so you can feel more personally connected. There are churches that fit many of our desires if we’d only look.

It’s like searching for those shoes to match your outfit. You’ll go shopping at 10 different malls, fight through traffic to do so and pay top dollar to make sure your fit has it going on. It’s important to do the same to find a place that feeds your spirit.

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
1:58 pm

I heard Ryan Cameron use an interesting term recently…keyboard courage. I immediately thought of this blog.
:)
LOL!

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
1:59 pm

KP…no we do not regulate the Dr. or Lawyers salary…but we do not see them on a weekly basis. Nor are we threatened with Hell to pay if we don’t pay. Granted they can take you to court or whatever. But hardly a comparison!
As far a a concert or a movie. I am actually seeing something move and entertain. Listening to someone speak for a long time just puts me to sleep. If the movie is boring or lasts too long, it does the same thing. Doesn’t mean that I am any less of a believer. I just comprehend differently. I don’t need you to read over the announcements that every person has in their hands (via programs) and can read for themselves….that saves 20 minutes! I am all for praise and worship…but sing the 5 minute song and be done…no need for all 5 of your songs to have encores….twice!

Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman

March 15th, 2010
1:59 pm

It’s not about the length of hours you spend in church, its about applying his word to your life.

Funny how people want to critcize others about their view on church, but want to endorse his word at the same time. A sin is a sin is a sin.

kinderbabe

March 15th, 2010
1:59 pm

lurker…you ain’t lyin.:) have a great rest of the day everyone.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
2:00 pm

In the old days, pastors would walk on foot to reach their sheep.That was commitment and dedication
Not so these days.They want pvt jets and bentleys and beemas.

I wonder if one really needs a bentley to move from larencville to Lithonia to go preach to folks or heal and pray for the sick or a chevy or honda will do just fine?????

That is the image I have a problem with and to say just give ur money to that thief,willingly,the rest will take care of itslef is kinda unreal.

I have a problem with willingly parting with my money then screaming later…I HAD A SUSPICION! :lol:

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
2:02 pm

@lurker ~ main reason why I thank God for just being. For the good I have in my life and the fact that I woke in the morning. I gets down on my knees and say “thank you” daily for so many richs and mental comfort I presently have. It is not good just to call on him in your sorrowful time of need. Much like telling someone you love them after they die. Tell them now, while they can hear it!!!!

lurker

March 15th, 2010
2:02 pm

For anybody that doesn’t know, there is a structure to worshipping and a portion of that in the scripture says, fail not to assembly yourselves together, another says how can you hear without a preacher. In order for God to “hear” you and you known to him as “his child”, you must at least be willing and do and in line with the lay out. Not that you can’t pray outside of a sanctuary but if you cannot do the simple things laid out and give a little (not money) then…..

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
2:03 pm

@SexyCool…I’m glad you feel connected to Jesus. Just remember…Jesus also represents giving. Meaning giving our time, talent and treasure. It also means giving of yourself to encourage other saints. The word mentions that we should NOT forsake the assembly of the saints. (Hebrews 10:25)

We attend church in order to receive a Word that will get you through the week, but to also serve as source of encouragement for those who also assemble with us. You may walk through the doors and have just the right word of encouragement for someone who is going through something you’ve already gone through. Or you may be able to offer a hug or smile that may get someone through their day.

Just a thought to consider…

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
2:03 pm

It is my personally belief that tithing is not about money. I know what I have asked of the Almighty and it has never been money or stuff. I asked for comfort..to be able to provide for myself and my son and to have good people around us. That request has been met in spades. I don’t normally testify on the goodness on this here blog..cause I don’t like all this my preachy–my pastor can beat your pastor in a holy roll showdown stuff..but I do follow the rule of Loving my neighbor as I love myself. That means..to me all my neighbors.

I am sorry but I can’t bring myself to buy into the idea of the celestial secured card. We are suppose to simple treat each other right all the time..respect our planet..care for our sick and hunger and lost. Droping a check off in a plate so I can get something back sounds like more like blackmail. Besides I was taught you give out of the goodness of your heart..NOT expecting a thang in return.

When I hear folks say well I paid my tithes why am I still struggling? or I am a good Christian why is this happening to me? I always go back to something a friend said to me once..Why not you? You think that because you pay or you pray..you are suppose to be exempt from life’s struggles? I was always taught it is through the struggle you gain strength. So why should by virtue of joining a church and paying tithes you should be exempt from that struggle? You go through trials so you can have that to share with someone else who is going through.

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
2:04 pm

@KP ~ I thought only lil chillin drop $5 in church these days…not grown folk.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
2:05 pm

Not so these days.They want pvt jets and bentleys and beemas.

Gosh melo, you are talking about like .05% of the preacher population with the private jets and bentleys! Come one. There are so many more humble and grounded preachers then ones that require excess.

Even though I’m from a large city, I grew up in a church that had no more than 50 members at any given time. Talk about a humble life! Even if all 50 of us tithes, he couldn’t get a beemer out of it! :lol:

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
2:05 pm

@Melo…there are hundreds of thousands of preachers out there who don’t have bentleys or beemas. Stop focusing on the minority because it jacks up your perspective.

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
2:06 pm

…keyboard courage. I immediately thought of this blog.

True that….

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
2:06 pm

Yeah KP but many are called..few… very few are chosen.

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
2:07 pm

Lurker – Good show ol chap.. I used to feel the same way about church pastors and such but one day I woke and knew something was missing.. Money couldnt take care of it, sex couldnt take care of it and hanging out couldnt cure it. I found myself wandering in the church one morning like Goldie and been there every Sunday since.. It has helped me tremendously just because its always good to hear kind words that uplift the spirit.. A message that speaks directly to you when you need it. Yeah its a beautiful thang..

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
2:07 pm

What people fail to realize is God may not answer when you call on him, but he will answer on his own time. His time and our time is not sychronized, and never will be.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
2:07 pm

I always go back to something a friend said to me once..Why not you?

Kym – I say this to myself all the time. And especially when bad things happen, to myself or someone else. I know that it could easily be me!

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
2:08 pm

@KP – I have not entered this discussion from the *money* standpoint. I mean, really, who am I to tell another person what to do with their finances.

I was just making an observation about the seeming comparison to entertainment. Is church entertainment or is it a duty that is to be fulfilled like going to work everyday?

Hell, I don’t have the answers. I just have questions.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
2:09 pm

Dream_n, it’s not criticizing but most folks do everything on an assumption and assume I’ll just do what feels good and what works for me. There is order to God and most folks that get offended does so because they’re ignorant to what God requires. Yes, he’s loving and forgiving and omnipotent but he has rules and standards and guidelines and structure. Half the world going to hell in a handbasket because half the world don’t know what God requires. Those “thou shalt nots…” weren’t given just to be given. They’re required but the only way to keep those is by living in the through the body of Christ. I can say all day long I don’t have nor committed fornication but if I think on those things, I’m just as guilty. So for those folks that are “saved” without Jesus, it is what it is. Not going to change. You can only be saved through Christ. Not on your own, not by what you think not by what works for you not but what feels good but by what’s required. Sorry if anyone is offended but it’s the truth. It’s not judging. It’s stated and a known fact, for those that know. Like I said most folks that get offended are those that don’t know. If I commit adultery and my pastor tells me “according to the Word of God, that’s sin”, why would I be offended. He’s only relay what’s written and was given. Doesn’t make him perfect, doesn’t make him judgemental. If he committed the same, doesn’t justify me induldging.

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
2:10 pm

BlackMagicWoman…find another ministry because not ALL ministries associate tithing with you going to hell. Not ALL churches sing the extended remix to each song LOL. Not ALL churches hold you hostage like my lil’ baptist church did when I was growing up. I have recommendations for ministries that may fit your wishlist. I’ll be happy to share.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
2:10 pm

Stop focusing on the minority because it jacks up your perspective

@KP….so I take we have weeded out the ones with bentleys and beemas as not authentic pastors but fraudsters??

then we can go on to the next lot??

?????

For Real

March 15th, 2010
2:10 pm

What up Blog Fam!

On topic: Lets face it may be PC-incorrect but the fact remains that some people are better than others.

Church: FREE WILL!!!!! You manage yours and I’ll manage mines!!!

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
2:12 pm

but the fact remains that some people are better than others.

:lol:

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
2:12 pm

@Kym-DIYer in Training….so true.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
2:13 pm

Ain’t that the truth Infamous. When something is missing and you know something is missing and your inclination is to search for God, that’s God calling you. That’s a great state and place to be in. If you search for him, he’ll find you.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
2:13 pm

There are so many more humble and grounded preachers then ones that require excess.

Granted Ared.

.Im not condeminig every pastor out there…just the activities of some(and they are many too) I consider to be wrong??

Superfulous Living,.. I call it!

Eddie and $$$$ are in this lot!

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
2:14 pm

@Leggs..exactly..and since you have no idea what time is your time..you have to keep pressing on..in the midst. Instead folks take tithing and church to mean well if I go..I will get a pass..or if I go I will get a blessing. You were blessed to walk, ride, bike, or trike in joker..say Thank you. If you find a quarter on the street be grateful..its one more quarter than what you already had.

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
2:15 pm

4Real – The Archer season finale is this week. And it has been renewed for another season.

For Real

March 15th, 2010
2:15 pm

Lurker: “There is order to God and most folks that get offended does so because they’re ignorant to what God requires.” – That is called religion. Every religion has it way to get to God. The question is which one do you pick?

lurker

March 15th, 2010
2:15 pm

I consider to be wrong

As SO often stated on here, who are you to judge. Like someone just said and it goes both ways, leave Eddie to God and you take care of you. You’re not in a better seat of “judgement” because you don’t have the jets and bentleys

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
2:15 pm

.Im not condeminig every pastor out there…just the activities of some(and they are many too) I consider to be wrong??

I guess it’s easier for you to do that, to give you a better reason/excuse to not find a church home in which you are comfortable.

You don’t have to attend Eddie Long’s church you know. ;)

Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman

March 15th, 2010
2:17 pm

When I tithe I give because it is required of me and I have no problem giving to whom I love. Now whether it be 10% 5% or 2%. You give not from an obligation stand point, but from the love of the heart. I don’t care what the preacher does with the money unles it’s directly affecting the church in some way. Ie: no lights, mortage not paid, no running water etc. We give partly to keep the church up and running. Now if he/she chooses to use the money for self gaining, then he will be accountable to not me, but his master.

Every person is different and we dont see the world the same. I personally dont belong to any religion, b/c I dont like the separation factor. I just love god and I know that he loves me even through me wrongs and my tribulations.

That’s the great thing about GOD. He can look past flaws or any viewpoints/opinions.

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
2:18 pm

Kym…I co-sign your 2:03.

I feel like I’m being told I can buy my way into heaven. So any heathen who plops down 10% or more can walk on into the pearly gates. But the person is has a good heart and loves to help their brother/sister can not because thsy chose to put their tithes straight to the source of what they believe in? Hmmmm

Heck you can go to a club for free sometimes. But the pressure is on to have funds for church? Why is that?

I got laid off last year…is that because I did not give 10% to church. Who knows! I guess some could say that…but I guess the ones who did who also lost their jobs should be pretty ticked off! But I know I have a good heart. I volunteered to go to Haiti to help out. I do community things. I am working on getting a dance class together for free for little girls of low incomed families to get them into something that could help with self esteem and possibly lead to great things laster in life. I do not look to be paid….my payment will be to see girls 3 and up smile and learn about the art or dance. As well as help with excercise.

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
2:18 pm

@Melo…we are not responsible for managing other people’s resources.

As is human nature…we tend to punish the majority because the influence and mistakes of the few. Let’s focus on getting our own porch together and that will have a far greater influence and impact in our world.

Point of clarification…I AM NOT HERE TO JUDGE. I am just trying to head off some of the many misconceptions associated with the church.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
2:19 pm

For Real, there is something that’s real and it exists. It’s call the Holy Spirit. It leads and guides and dictates to you as God sees fit. The lay out won’t every change so you can like it or leave it. It was established and set up by God. Now, if you go through the motion with being spirit led or filled then yes, you’re practicing religion. Going through the motions and going through it in spririt and truth makes the differences. You do it in honesty and sincerity and God takes it from there. So what if I go daily in spirit and truth and my neighbor does it by motion, just doing it religiously? Not my call nor yours. Goes back to judging. It’s not any person place to determine if a person is saved or religious as there is a difference. Not for you to choose or comment or pass an opinion. You just do you, towards God, in spirit and in truth.

For Real

March 15th, 2010
2:19 pm

Kimmie: I know did the link the to the Diversity Hire work?

lurker

March 15th, 2010
2:20 pm

Now, if you go through the motion with being spirit led or filled then yes, you’re practicing religion. Going through the motions and going through it in spririt and truth makes the differences.

I meant “without being Spirit led or filled”

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
2:20 pm

random thoughts:

I can’t believe I broke my nail last night! It took 2 months to grow and had I been wearing gloves while cleaning, I might still have it :evil:

It’s only 2:19 ??? :shock:

Can’t wait to pick up little dude today

If only I had taken the time to grab my coat this morning :-(

It’s only 2:20????

Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman

March 15th, 2010
2:21 pm

@lurker

That post wasn’t on either side of the coin.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
2:22 pm

But the person is has a good heart and loves to help their brother/sister can not because thsy chose to put their tithes straight to the source of what they believe in? Hmmmm

BlackMagic – If someone is telling you this, they are wrong. There are steps that are a part of our Christian duty, but ultimately trust in John 3:16. :)

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
2:23 pm

4Real – Yeah, complete with the For Mature Audiences Only!

Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman

March 15th, 2010
2:24 pm

Melo,
There are always bad apples on the tree. But judging a few based upon how other’s handle things just isn’t smart.

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
2:25 pm

I am LOVING March Madness this year.

And the 30for30 on Reggie Miller last night was frickin’ hilarious. (Made me miss *physical* play in the league.)

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
2:25 pm

Pardon my typos…I am so tired. I can barely stay awake! LOL

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
2:25 pm

Black Mag – Umm yes thats alot of the message thats out there today. Rev Ike has spawned a new generation of “Proserity Preachers”. You just have to find a church that is concerned with your salvation and the tithes is what you can do from the heart.

Leggs – If all you got is 5 dollars for the pot and you give that cheerfully and not begrudgingly because the Lord loves a cheerful giver.. Then you’ll be ok cause you gave whatever you could.. And alot of folks be in church fronting giving money they dont have to show off for other church folk..

lurker

March 15th, 2010
2:25 pm

wasn’t meant to be @Dream_n

For Real

March 15th, 2010
2:26 pm

Lurker: Free Will God lay it on you and then it’s up to you. God doesn’t force his will upon you, religion well not so much.

Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman

March 15th, 2010
2:28 pm

I think we’re getting mixed up lurker. I meant my intial post wasn’t tryin to take sides since we have a division in the room. We’re all good I love god and anyone that doesn’t. Whether we disagree or agree. If GOD is our Father we’re all working to one day sit at the foot of his throne.

Just asking

March 15th, 2010
2:29 pm

@AMAZON- how is W8?

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
2:29 pm

I got laid off last year…is that because I did not give 10% to church. Who knows! I guess some could say that…but I guess the ones who did who also lost their jobs should be pretty ticked off!

BlackMagic – I was too and as a faithful tither I was shocked! But tithing is just one of the acts of faith and He saw it fit to give me another job within a week! That’s not to say do X and Y won’t happen to you, but I do think it helped show me what faith can do.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
2:30 pm

@AMAZON- how is W8?

I don’t know asking. How is he?

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
2:30 pm

Well…one thing I know is this – Hell sounds awful and I don’t wanna go.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
2:31 pm

For Real, nope he doesn’t which is what I believe Raqi was trying to explain the other day. He doesn’t but for eternity and eternal life, you gotta work and be a servant to get there. How fair is it that you never gave of yourself to God in this life and you line up right along with those that did work and put forth the effort? That’s what I meant. There are sooo many folks that simply don’t have room for God in their life nor can find the time to give back to Him but trust EVERYBODY wants heaven. There’s a divine will for every person to make heaven but if you don’t put the work (and I use that loosely for those wanting an excuse) please don’t expect it on the end. Yes everybody is a free choosing free moral agent but eternity exists and if you want a good one, you might want to find out what’s needed to get there.

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
2:31 pm

All I will say is this and leave it there..Religion..has done some destructive things to our world..whole nations divided and people have shed and loss blood all in the name of protecting it. When someone tells me that their religion is better or best or above..I often wonder how can you believe that light and dark exist within a power that is pure love? I have never never allowed myself to believe that the Almighty exist just to punish creation. We do a damn good job of that ourselves.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
2:32 pm

As SO often stated on here, who are you to judge??

melo!!

:mrgreen:

Am I late on this answe??

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
2:33 pm

@InfamousD ~ no doubt I understand in that case. I got the impression with the previous post that people were holding back “giving” and felt by dropping $5 they’ve covered their bases. Huge difference.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
2:33 pm

You don’t have to attend Eddie Long’s church you know.

thank god i dont

lurker

March 15th, 2010
2:33 pm

That’s not to say do X and Y won’t happen to you, but I do think it helped show me what faith can do.

Good point! We’re all here and in life and things happen to us all but having faith is God seeing you through adversity and mishaps, and happenings. There is a difference.

Cemeeli

March 15th, 2010
2:34 pm

omnipotent….

Yes, GOD is the only person that i’ve ever known to be EVERYWHERE all the time, but has never moved.

hmmm…church…church…church?…Well, it has to be in you first…if you’re attending just to say “i do go on Sunday”…that’s amiss…as a matter of fact, the Word speaks about the church being the people. I ascribe to that, and believe my faith is based on the Corinth Church type of belief…

anyway…with that being said; The “church” is the only army that will kill it’s own wounded.

and no, i’m not trying to offend believers, and the spirit filled because those persons will understand what that defines without the Pharisee-ic attitude.

Good day folks…back to duty.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
2:36 pm

This is my last…for those that are ignorant to Salvation it’s not the same as religion. Religion is man-made. Salvation and true religion is of God.

Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman

March 15th, 2010
2:36 pm

I just wish believers and followers would lead by action and not put on the high and mighty armour when dealing with those that don’t believe or have trouble understanding.

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
2:38 pm

Kym – There have been examples given of when God punishes his creations. There was something about a boat, 40 days and 40 night, umm sodom and Gam.. Well you know.. For all we know he might be punishing us now and we’re to arrogant to notice whats happening.. He might be giving us warning signs that if you dont straighten up Im gonna evaporate you all..

Cemeeli

March 15th, 2010
2:39 pm

btw – How can anyone not pay alms to someone that owns everything anyway?!!?

It’s only a test…

…he doesn’t need your 10% anyway. He can change your whole life with just a thought…10% does what to your pockets? really?

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
2:39 pm

@Melo…Melo you can’t judge JACK LOL.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
2:40 pm

Religion is man-made. Salvation and true religion is of God.

im glad i know that putting 10% in that plate aint the salvation.

Its called trickicking :lol:

Im not funding nobody’s jet nor extravagant lyfestyle…I am not stupid!

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
2:43 pm

Cee – Its a test AMEN AMEN and AMEN again..

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
2:44 pm

@DK She/He very well might be..but since you can’t prove it and I can’t prove it..I will stick with what I know to be true..and that is my own personal relationship..I look at God as the Father/Mother..He/She knows me..because as his/her child..you know your youngin.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
2:45 pm

There are always bad apples on the tree

@Dream??

im glad u and I agree on the bad ones so far!!

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
2:46 pm

Kym – I agree with you and yes we have done a brilliant job of F-n ish up..

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
2:48 pm

Lurker – True Religion is in my closet.. Im sorry I just couldnt resist that one..

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
2:48 pm

Okay and what about religions that don’t pay in money..but pay in talent. On the island of Bali the people there are poor but they make wood carvings to honor God..are they going to bust hell wide open because they don’t tithe like others do?

Cee you are suppose to say thank you daily. Not just with your quarter on Sunday or Saturday as the case maybe. The test is what you do daily not what you do one day a week.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
2:50 pm

On the island of Bali the people there are poor but they make wood carvings to honor God..are they going to bust hell wide open because they don’t tithe like others do?

That’s not an apple to apple comparison though. I worship God based on my Christian principles. I can’t say what will happen for non-Christians as I don’t know their principles.

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
2:53 pm

@Melo…if everyone operated like you the church doors would close.

I’m gonna recommend a church that you’ll probably like.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
2:53 pm

Infamous – good one

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
2:55 pm

m gonna recommend a church that you’ll probably like.

KP – He said the UMC church by his house is in and out in 45 minutes. :shock:

If he’s unwilling to commit to that, I doubt he’s really interested in finding a church home. :lol:

Melo

March 15th, 2010
3:00 pm

I’m gonna recommend a church that you’ll probably like

@KP

I told u i like United methodist down my road—-i dont go every sunday

I like the seventh day adventist my family goes to—–i dont go evry saturday

I like the church some of my african brethern go to.. in jonesbro..i go there occassionally on sundays….

all good churches in their own way in different ways…but i go when i feel like…..

and they dont fundraise nor do the pastors live extravagantly like I was observing,no wonder im comfortable with them somewhat.

If things change,they kiss my azz!

I try to be good every day,to my neighbors etc…..

ALL I can do

Cemeeli

March 15th, 2010
3:01 pm

The test is what you do daily not what you do one day a week.

@ Kym – What cha getting at sis? The “test” is in everything that we do…GOD should be first in ALL things…Not just in good deed.

If the Bali children earn an income…yes they should pay alms there.

You know i have not issue in stating what i believe…let’s get that straight first….okay.

2nd – I don’t have a Heaven or Hell to put none of the Bali, ya’ll, or mine in…soooo if a person don’t believe i don’t force. As Jesus told the people when they were acting like Bilal’s child…

Yes, i will speak to that also. Do not the hyporcrite say to another “they spot is in your eye?”.

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
3:01 pm

Is it the time of the service that’s the problem moreso than the doctrine???

Melo

March 15th, 2010
3:01 pm

@Ared!

Im willing to commit to God in how i conduct myself..not to a church.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
3:01 pm

We should only be concerned about what we do and how we interact and our relationship with God. What others do or seemingly don’t have to do, should have no bearings on my actions.

2 Corinthians
[10] For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad.
[11] Knowing therefore the terror of the Lord, we persuade men;

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
3:03 pm

Let’s get one thing correct first.

Christianity is a relationship and not a religion. Those who are Christians have a relationship with Jesus. We DO the things we do because we operate in obedience and through faith.

Our faith initiates the relationship with Him. Our works demonstrate an ability to follow the principles written in God’s Word.

It’s difficult to say you have a relationship with someone and not agree with the principles on which they stand. You cannot be considered one of God’s children until you have a relationship with Him. Until then…you are simply one of His creation. Similar to the man who gets a woman pregnant and leaves…he created the child, but doesn’t have a relationship like a true father would.

Also, the Bible isn’t like Golden Corral where you can pick and choose what you want to believe. You either believe…or you don’t. You can’t simply extract God’s grace, mercy and love without agreeing to the discipline He enforces for our disobedience.

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
3:05 pm

I guess religion is the topic this afternoon.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
3:05 pm

Enter your comments here

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
3:05 pm

Im willing to commit to God in how i conduct myself..not to a church.

That’s what I was saying melo.

I don’t feel any pressure for you to join a church. Like said before, if you ever feel you are lacking or missing something…the church will be there.

My dad spent my childhood only going to church during holidays when my mom asked. Eventually, he felt a urge to start attending again. Now he’s an elder in the church.

A lot of my girlfriends will dismiss a guy who doesn’t attend church regularly. I never do. Everyone has a different path. I can respect that.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
3:05 pm

Nice change up from oversexed.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
3:08 pm

Also, the Bible isn’t like Golden Corral where you can pick and choose what you want to believe

@KP

so why do we have different interpretations based on who is the pastor. and their intentions or motives….??

basically becoz not everybody believes whats in the bible,wholly..we all pick and choose…

@Lurker
things done in his body, according to that he hath done

body means in this lyfetime…not church!

.

Raqi

March 15th, 2010
3:08 pm

Mo, I am drinking a nice cold Pepsi Cola (that’s how my granny used to say it) right now.

Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman

March 15th, 2010
3:08 pm

KP

There are different Christian Denominations.

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
3:08 pm

I’m done with my sermonettes for the day.

On topic…those who separate themselves based on superficial things may have challenges in relationships. It’s no good to pass up someone who may treat you like a king or queen just because they not wear a suit to work or sip Starbucks during a morning briefing at work.

I know some blue collar workers who are gonna make women very happy if they can find ones who aren’t stuck on Benzes and Brooks Brothers. They wear jeans to work, but will cook, open the door for their ladies and care for them like queens.

mytw♥tatas

March 15th, 2010
3:09 pm

Well if you’re a black woman apparently everyone’s out of our Financial league. Ryan Cameron’s talking about some study reporting that the average Black Woman’s worth is $5 or less. Anybody listen from the beginning? I’m wondering who conducted it and tho I don’t even half of em up I gotta review the criterion…

Hope you grown folks are feeling good this fine day.

Raqi

March 15th, 2010
3:10 pm

Property Taxes

Property Insurance

Utilities

Up Keep and Maintenance

Who’s place is it to pay for those things in the church if not those attending? Where do you all think your money goes? If not for the running of the church. Churches are business’ just like others. And most ministers that’s their job. Their only job. Do they not deserve to get paid? They have families to feed and bills to pay. I am not talking about the Creflos and Longs, not that I really care what they do, but I am talking about your everyday ministers that are out to give God’s word and spend their days and nights counseling and ministering. How are they supposed to get by if not from part of the tithes that we pay?

Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman

March 15th, 2010
3:10 pm

Black Woman’s worth is $5 or less

Oh wow.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
3:11 pm

mytwo:

Here is a link to the story. My girlfriends and I have been discussing it on Facebook.

http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/10068/1041225-28.stm

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
3:11 pm

I can’t stand Ryan Cameron.

Cemeeli

March 15th, 2010
3:12 pm

@ lurker – All of Pauls episcopals (sp?) are worth a daily look back. Corinth is just one church, that speak slouder in terms of growing faith. The drunkerds, sezzually promiscuous, adulters…and believers all can relate in one book. Love that book.

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
3:12 pm

there are various Christian denominations, but that doesn’t take away from what TRUE Christianity is built upon.

TRUE Christianity is based on belief and acceptance of Jesus Christ..PERIOD! (Romans 10:9, 1 John 5:12)

All of the other stuff is what gets us into trouble. If denominations are an issue then find a non-denominational ministry.

Don’t get caught up on rituals…because they come secondary to the RELATIONSHIP which is most important.

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
3:14 pm

Regardless of the topic, whether is tithes, tipping or teabagging, one thing is obvious – most of the time, we just have to agree to disagree and K.I.M.

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
3:14 pm

They wear jeans to work, but will cook, open the door for their ladies and care for them like queens.

Well said and true no doubt….unfortunately there are a good number of women(not ALL) who look past the blue collar guy cause he isn’t all flashy n whatnot…verything that looks good to you may not necessarily be good for you.

Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman

March 15th, 2010
3:15 pm

KP

I understand. I just didnt want to confuse people. Because my mom’s side of the family are Christinans, but the call themselves “fire baptized christians”. They have differnt set of rules than some Catholics, Lutherans, or Baptist who all adhere to being Christians also.

Raqi

March 15th, 2010
3:15 pm

Cemeeli and Lurker, I look at church as being a hospital for those (folks like us) that are in need. Just like I have to pay my doctor for his services I have to pay the church for its services. Jesus is a physician. He said so and I believe him.

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
3:15 pm

shoulda been “everything”…but I digress.

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
3:17 pm

@Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman I totally understand. I sometimes spend more time debating with those within than I do those outside.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
3:17 pm

not that I really care what they do

but those are the ones we talking about Raqi?

do they have to move in benzes and bentleys just so they can go to preach and dress in $2000.00 suits so they look good for the congregation.

why dont u all like difficult discussions,instead u want to discuss the easy everyday pastor we know is striving very much to do good?? :lol:

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
3:17 pm

KP….the bible has been translated over and over. How do you know if what you read is true? We all know through the years when whomever was in power…if they did not like something they changed it. Or if they wanted to add something they did. Now unless you were there when JC himself walked the earth and witnessed everything…you can not say for sure if what you are reading now is in fact his word. I find contradictions that let me know not all is what it seems. I believe the bible is a great guide…but to say every word in there is God’s own law/words….I would not be able to do that, based on history and the corruption of man. I believe it is a common sense approach. I am not saying twist it to suit your desires. But if something doesn’t make sense to you….question it. I don’t just believe something because Pastor said so. I use the common sense I was given on interpretation of what I believe to be true.

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
3:19 pm

Ryan Cameron’s talking about some study reporting that the average Black Woman’s worth is $5 or less

WTF? See part of me is wondering why he would repeat something like that….then again maybe he’s just tryna get some convo started or something on/ the station.

Give me my Dayum Hour back (not SlimOne)

March 15th, 2010
3:20 pm

Speaking of churches, I received a hand-written postcard from a church in my area saying we miss you and would like for me to come to FRIENDS day later on this month. I don’t believe I’ve ever visited that church….got me looking like this is a setup. Get there and it’ll be some scheme to get a whole bunch of folks to pay for some bill they didn’t pay 38 years ago. lol (go to chuuch and get locked up)

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
3:20 pm

@mytwo, I have that report. Let me try to find it and will send to you. It also states that the the average white woman worth is somewhere in the ballpark of $179,000. I didn’t bring it to this blog cuz I thought it was a report manipulated in a crockpot of shyt!

Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman

March 15th, 2010
3:21 pm

BlackMagicWoman

I don’t believe GOD will never teach me wrong. SO while the book is a tool to help you throughtout your journey. You should rely on your spirit with whom he communicates with to guide you.

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
3:21 pm

KP – Regarding your post about blue collar works, read my 11:11 post from this morning. Nobody blue collar worker I know has trouble meeting and keeping women. Most women with any sense are happy for a nice guy that is gainfully employed.

Those blue collar guys you know that keep getting passed up – probably need to look in the mirror at themselves. It’s something within THEM and not the color of their collar.

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
3:22 pm

Well…hell, the other day, I heard someone saying that the Black Man’s average NET worth was $5.

Oh well, guess it depends on who’s doing the study and who’s reading the results on any given day.

SMDH.

Dream_n~ Mordern Day Woman

March 15th, 2010
3:22 pm

*ever

I’m out work calls. Enjoy your evening folks!

Melo

March 15th, 2010
3:24 pm

$5.00??

thats as good as the subway 5 footer?? :lol:

$100.00 net wrth..???

black women…really?

boyii!?

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
3:25 pm

u so stoopid….go kill yoself

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
3:25 pm

She keeps on passing me By

DreamsMaterialize

March 15th, 2010
3:26 pm

I give with a purpose, and if I don’t believe that purpose is being fulfilled, then I’ll give somewhere else or in another way. No way I’m giving to any church, organization, or individual if I think they’re misusing what I’m giving. I need to wait for the Creator to deal with them for their misuse. I can instead choose to give somewhere else.

lurker

March 15th, 2010
3:27 pm

Me too Raqi

Ceemeeli – Yes, those Corinthians were having a hard time at first…as all of us and serves well as an example of overcoming things of things of the flesh.

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
3:27 pm

@BlackMagicWoman…GREAT question. After thorough research you can ultimately find out that the Bible has been one of the most accurately translated books of all time. When you take the early Dead Sea scroll manuscripts, you can see that it is written within 99% accuracy to original meaning.

When most people (muslims, buddhists, etc.) argue against the Bible, they usually pick out the things that were based on eyewitness accounts. Does it matter whether Jesus fed 4,000 or 5,000? Not really…because the principle of Him being able to do miraculous things is still supported in either case.

I encourage anyone to get their own understanding and not rely on only the Pastor to spoon feed you. Terminology is usually an excuse for not reading the Bible. However, if you’re able to understand any of the following (smh, ttyl, LOL, ROFL, LMBO, etc.) …there is a Bible available for you to read. You learn what you truly want to understand ;)

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
3:28 pm

Well as for me, myself and mine..I don’t go cause I like to sleep in on Sundays..I have yet to find a place or a group of people..in many moons that I want to spend that much time..looking at. The last church services I attended I knew I was not going back because of the mass baptism where the people got wet but the pastor didnt…I don’t like any church that says everyone is going to die and go to hell but them..(not very Jesus like to me), or where the phrases..building fund and pastor anniversary are on all the programs.

Lets see or where all pray offerings have a price tag..50.00, 100.00 or higher. I don’t like where they tell people to come up and hug or shake hands with your neighbors(I don’t want you touching me–smile and nod works just fine).

Oh and churchy folks..I don’t like them..those who only identify themselves as members of the church. “My name is Ruth Beth Ann Michaels and I am a member of the deacon board..usher society from the mighty clouds of joy humble pie..do or die church of christ.”

Oh and finally..I can not nor will I ever get with the idea that the only way I can hear from God is thru someone else. Why he/she got to tell you? If I am standing right here and willing to listen..why not tell me? And how do I know you are not lying to me anyway. You can pray with me, for me..but please dont tell me that the only way my pray will be heard is thru you.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
3:28 pm

Leggs – That $179 was for cohabitating white women. I posted the link above.

And lets face it, whites have had more generational wealth and money to pass on to their children more than black folks have. How many of us grew up with trust funds? Even if the numbers are skewed the fact remains that other races are better about keeping money in the family.

Sassy Me...juicy fruit :-)

March 15th, 2010
3:29 pm

Okay it’s talking about median wealth and the disparity in salaries between white and AA women….but that’s not new.

Cemeeli

March 15th, 2010
3:29 pm

@ Raqi – Church is in me, and where as the ‘church building’ is over there—> somewhere. I bring something to church when i go…first of all i bring worship in my spirit, my love, problems, money, a praise…a praise indeed.

Yes, I believe we do need to go to church to have corporate church/worship/commune/fellowship or any one of the 500 bazillion names we have for corporate worship. The Word says “how can one hear without a preacher?” We have leaders in everything else we…

I listen to the Witness, mormons, mennonites…see, this will take folks (myself for one) that are really seeking wisdom, and understanding beyond their own flesh and carnal mind to appreciate.

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
3:29 pm

DK – When guys in prison can get play, and you are out here free with a steady job and keep getting passed by, somethings wrong.

JMHO

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
3:29 pm

$179,000 that is.

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
3:30 pm

My name is Ruth Beth Ann Michaels and I am a member of the deacon board..usher society from the mighty clouds of joy humble pie..do or die church of christ.”

Bwah ha ha ha ha… You aint right but that was funny.. Do or Die church of christ.. Dang..

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
3:30 pm

Uh oh…the MIA boogie monster ate my last post. I’m done for today!

Glad to resurface for the day. Didn’t mean to hijack the topic, but it was Melo’s fault. Back to lurkville for KP!

who...me?

March 15th, 2010
3:31 pm

@ Raqi

Do churches pay property taxes? I thought all this was tax free… hmmm.. maybe thats just on the federal level.

Either way, when I grew up, the minister had TWO jobs just like everyone else in the place. He did not get paid what so ever and to anyone that uses the ‘well the church is so big it takes up all his time…..’ line, thats BS. Most times the ministers/preachers are so dang on power hungry that they’re not willing to share the pulpit (= power). If they did, they’d have time to go get a job like everyone else. They got you fooled. Religion & God is free, church is not! If you get rid of the church, you still have religion & God.

Most of you people have been scammed into believing they go hand in hand. How about folks really open their heart and congregate in each other’s homes, yards, parks etc for FREE and so everyone can PRESERVE their own wealth?

Melo

March 15th, 2010
3:32 pm

That study only sampled the folks(black women) in hood Compton california, I think!

DreamsMaterialize

March 15th, 2010
3:33 pm

I don’t need to wait for the Creator to deal with them for their misuse.

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
3:33 pm

Most times the ministers/preachers are so dang on power hungry that they’re not willing to share the pulpit (= power).

Most?

You folks have been watching way too much TV. :lol:

THE INFAMOUS DK AKA RUDE BOI

March 15th, 2010
3:33 pm

Kimmie – That cause she was a Flake like Corn and I was born not to understand by letting her pass I had proved to be a better man

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
3:34 pm

That study only sampled the folks(black women) in hood Compton california, I think!

:roll:

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
3:37 pm

New Topic:

I can’t believe I didn’t listen to myself when self said: “Look, print out your State tax return before your computer crashes”

So here I am with crashed comp and all my stuff GONE!!!!! :mad:

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
3:37 pm

at least I got my federal refund already :-D

Melo

March 15th, 2010
3:38 pm

who…me?

u right about that observation on power..they dont want to give space to to eths to preach..power hungry…

they act like frank ski who dont like Wanda near that mike in the morn :lol: (i like him tho,regardless)

who...me?

March 15th, 2010
3:38 pm

@ Raqi

Do churches pay property taxes? I thought all this was tax free… hmmm.. maybe thats just on the federal level.

Either way, when I grew up, the minister had TWO jobs just like everyone else in the place. He did not get paid what so ever and to anyone that uses the ‘well the church is so big it takes up all his time…..’ line, thats BS. Most times the ministers/preachers are so dang on power hungry that they’re not willing to share the pulpit (= power). If they did, they’d have time to go get a job like everyone else. They got you fooled. Religion & God is free, church is not! If you get rid of the church, you still have religion & God.

Most of you people have been scammed into believing they go hand in hand. How about folks really open their heart and congregate in each other’s homes, yards, parks etc for FREE and so everyone can PRESERVE their own wealth?

Tazzee - 60 days til Mrs.

March 15th, 2010
3:39 pm

SCool Run was cool – my running partner runs MUCH faster than me, so I might as well have run by myself, LOL. I hope to get another outdoor run in before my 5k this weekend.

Raqi

March 15th, 2010
3:40 pm

who me, so is education so let’s fire all the teachers. Heck let’s close all the hospitals and practice alternative medicines.

who...me?

March 15th, 2010
3:42 pm

whoops, sorry for the double post, I caught that computer virus I am is passing around.

@ Raqi

So you agree? Good….

SexyCool - About Bidness

March 15th, 2010
3:43 pm

Let me know – May try to meet you out. Since I’m not quite at 5K distance, I’m sure I would end up trying to keep up with you.

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
3:47 pm

Have any of you seen that show Model City, on the new network Centric? The show follows 5 AA male models that work for RED modeling agency. It’s pretty interesting.

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
3:49 pm

Hey are we still talking church???

I feel bad posting this on the same page as church talk, but Superhead is getting a divorce…who woulda thunk it! :lol: :lol: :lol:

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
3:49 pm

Leggs – Not surprised.

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
3:50 pm

@Leggs she is divorcing Eddie Winslow?

DreamsMaterialize

March 15th, 2010
3:51 pm

“now there she goes again, the dopest Ethiopian…”
Pharycide is one of the most underrated groups out there.

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
3:53 pm

Okay I am going home and get my hour of sleep back. Cause this is crazy..I am about to fall asleep sitting while typing.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
3:54 pm

@Kimmie …..Not surprised.

I am surprised she was married!

some guys are truly muckrackers! :lol: :lol:

DreamsMaterialize

March 15th, 2010
3:55 pm

And lets face it, whites have had more generational wealth and money to pass on to their children more than black folks have.
And this is why I’m always confused when certain black folks start talking about “pedigree”. To what pedigree are they referring…who had the shiniest shackles?

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
3:56 pm

I don’t think she ended up marrying Eddie Winslow. I heard he dumped her and she ended up marrying some guy she declined to name.

Leggs – Where is the story?

Kym-DIYer in Training

March 15th, 2010
3:57 pm

@Dreams..normally its based on those who got off the plantation first or pass the paperbag test or can prove they have a direct connection to someone white..like Sally Hemmings kids..but the majority of us are just field hands kids. (Proud of it!!)

Give me my Dayum Hour back (not SlimOne)

March 15th, 2010
3:58 pm

Kym ” I am going home and get my hour of sleep back. Cause this is crazy..I am about to fall asleep sitting while typing”

We were just discussing this at work, which by the way we are ALL bout to fall asleep. Yall be careful driving home today because they say after a time change there are more accidents. It’s amazing what that one hour can do. They say you should go to bed 10 minutes earlier and wake up 10mins earlier for a week before the change. I’m about to get on this cup of joe because clearly I’m not going to make it.

Eiljah

March 15th, 2010
3:59 pm

Good Afternoon Folks!

Connect with GOD and Jehovah will guide your thru what you want to give in time, tithes and your talents!

If you attend church then support it, Just find a church that is doing what you would like to see done with the time, tithes and talent!

@BlackMagic….You doing what GOD is leading you to do, your contributions come from the heart and a cheerful happy giver is all what GOD is asking us to do! Words from the bible are guide and helps you and me to discearn what is good, bad, right and wrong so we can start living the best life we can!

lurker

March 15th, 2010
4:00 pm

I am surprised she was married!

Let me guess Melo, she’s a wh*re and a slut and not worth anything….by your standard…right?

Yeah, I thought so.

Give me my Dayum Hour back (not SlimOne)

March 15th, 2010
4:00 pm

“To what pedigree are they referring…who had the shiniest shackles?”

Dreams :lol:

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
4:03 pm

Who Me? I will make sure new comp has anti-virus properly installed before I start looking at explicit sites. :-D

mqew

March 15th, 2010
4:03 pm

And now the world around me begans movin in slow motion
Whenever she happens to walk by…. <——– PHARCYDE WILL NEVA B4GOTTN

Leggs – Now why would that trick, ummm I mean chick, be getting a divorce i wonder?

LURKER

March 15th, 2010
4:04 pm

I want to taste me some blackmagic….I bet that is ummmmmmm uuummm uuuuuum goood! :wink: :wink:

Religion….If you are a follower of that you will be confused about tithing! :smile:

Tmac

March 15th, 2010
4:05 pm

torn between a hot, sexy, damn good looking chick with no education and average looking (presentable) smart girl with career job…who makes decent money (as much if not more)….what to do..

Melo

March 15th, 2010
4:06 pm

Let me guess Melo, she’s a wh*re and a slut and not worth anything….by your standard…right?

lurker???

why do u have to waste ur brain cells guessing when the truth is starring u in the face.

Read her book if u want empirical evidence of who she is…her own mouf narrating her ordeals,giving blow jobs to countelss men..

lurker

March 15th, 2010
4:07 pm

Melo,

Again, she’s a slut by your judgemental standards? You’re a real piece of work.

who...me?

March 15th, 2010
4:08 pm

@ Tmac

Beauty/sexiness is only skin deep…… what truly matters is…who’s better in bed?

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
4:08 pm

torn between a hot, sexy, damn good looking chick with no education and average looking (presentable) smart girl with career job…who makes decent money (as much if not more)….what to do..

:|

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
4:10 pm

Tmac, how about dating someone you’re compatiable with that you love that loves you?

mqew

March 15th, 2010
4:10 pm

…why does the apple of my eye overlook and disregard
and disregard my feelings no matter how much i try..

I am whatever you say I am

March 15th, 2010
4:10 pm

LMAO @ that youtube clip where Karinne Steffens got dumped into a garbage can head first!

For Real

March 15th, 2010
4:11 pm

Lets see what the happs are:

1. $5.00 will get you a long way with Black chicks in Compton
2. Hungry Preachers eat power bars
3. Let me see if I got this right I am, myself and self. Number of claimants on tax form 16.
4. Tazzee’s running partner is fast but it will cost you 5k. For Real going back to Cali.
5. Raqi want to fire all the teachers and smoke weed and Who me.. got five on it!
6. Apparently Scool can’t keep up with Tazzee’s fast ass friend but Scool is not quite 5k.
7. “Have any of you seen that show Model City” – It must be that time of the month for Kimmie.
8. Apparently Leggs church was talking about Superhead last Sunday.
9. Shout out to KP!!!

lurker

March 15th, 2010
4:11 pm

Melo, passing out head jobs like lollipops ain’t something I’d prescribe to and I’m sure the average man would take a pass on settling down with her but you’re such a freaking slut opportunist. I don’t wish anything bad on your baby girls but you REALLY should be careful cause dna passing along to our kids. It seems to me that you’re always looking to carry, participate and up the nasty. I tell you being a slut just don’t wear well on women and I would hope they don’t get your dna when it comes that because as hard as you are on women and always looking for an opportunity to belittle and really thinking women ain’t really work their weight in paper, I just wonder how you’re going to take them out and about doing the get down.

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
4:12 pm

“Actor Darius McCrary is headed for divorce court. Hot on the heels of landing the role as the new “Malcolm” on the soap opera The Young And The Restless, his marriage has fallen apart. McCrary is best for his role as “Eddie Winslow” on the TV show Family Matters. He married Video Vixen/Author Karrine Steffans (Superhead) last year. Sources say the couple has been having problems for a while, and that McCrary could no longer deal with his wife’s lies. Steffans is best known for her numerous affairs with rappers and actors. She detailed it all in her book Confessions Of A Video Vixen.”

This report came from the 4-1-1 report I get from Hollywood chenigans…too long to post.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
4:12 pm

Again, she’s a slut by your judgemental standards?

lurker??

at least i have standards..why dont i hear about urs so i can judge u??

Are u related?? :lol:

DreamsMaterialize

March 15th, 2010
4:13 pm

normally its based on those who got off the plantation first my point exactly…no real pedigree.

PHARCYDE WILL NEVA B4GOTTN never. they were on point.

kimmie

March 15th, 2010
4:13 pm

4Real – No, just channel surfing, plus 2 of the models were on Tom Joyner & Steve Harvey!

Melo

March 15th, 2010
4:13 pm

Melo, passing out head jobs like lollipops ain’t something I’d prescribe to and I’m sure the average man would take a pass on settling down with her

@lurker!

good,we agree

BUT.. u just hate to hear me saying it??? :lol:

get a lyfe gerl!

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
4:15 pm

@ForReal ~ you’re wrong for using the word “apparently” with no evidence. I wasn’t in church Sunday!

For Real

March 15th, 2010
4:15 pm

Tmac: Choose the one with the finest mamma because everything else is equal.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
4:16 pm

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
4:17 pm

Well hot damn…she did marry Eddie Winslow. I couldn’t keep up with all her “soulmates” (”Papa,” Lil Wayne, Bill Maher and then Eddie Winslow.) Sheesh

lurker

March 15th, 2010
4:18 pm

and viturally, Melo

lurker

March 15th, 2010
4:18 pm

He just strikes as one of those dudes that will drag behind anything…ugh

Melo

March 15th, 2010
4:20 pm

lurker??

Steffans is best known for her numerous affairs with rappers and actors. She detailed it all in her book =$5.00

:lol: :lol:

AmazonRed™

March 15th, 2010
4:20 pm

mqew

March 15th, 2010
4:21 pm

So Eddie Winslow? I thought it was the Irkurl guy….

Eiljah

March 15th, 2010
4:21 pm

DreamsM……A excellent comment, I was having this conversation this weekend regarding pedigree.

I stated your pedigree has been dictated by someone else’s opinion because our history is from slavery. Men and women need to really think about what exactly they are looking in a potential mate for a relationship! We have so many relationships that have failed that were based on money and looks.

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
4:24 pm

@ARed ~ never heard of anal beads until I came onto this blog in 2006.

Melo

March 15th, 2010
4:27 pm

Ared/Leggs??

The Darius guy is very brave! :lol:

he didnt mind the back of head falling off!

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
4:39 pm

I see everyone has scurried back to their corners? Too funny!

DreamsMaterialize

March 15th, 2010
4:43 pm

Elijah I agree. Seems as though we’re always measuring ourselves agains another’s standard, but then we’re shocked and amazed when we don’t “measure up”.

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
4:45 pm

Lurker don’t make me put a spell on you! :evil:

KP (http://www.chatkafeonline.com)

March 15th, 2010
4:45 pm

@For Real…What’s Up!!!

Melo

March 15th, 2010
4:45 pm

Leggs??

I think everybody is kinda scared and reviewing their situation in view of superhead’s!

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
4:49 pm

Naw, I know why they all ran back to lurksville.

LURKER

March 15th, 2010
4:51 pm

@BlackmagicWoman……..I am waiting, I want you to put it on me! Sixpack at your service! :smile: :wink:

Superhead will do what it takes to pleae her man, then she will go out and tell the world!

SexyCool is like that but with telling the world!

That is all!

Leggs

March 15th, 2010
4:55 pm

Don’t put a question mark where God has placed a period!!

Nite nite!

BlackMagicWoman

March 15th, 2010
4:58 pm

Lurker…hopefully not a 6 pack of beer. Men with pregnant guts are so nasty! YUCK! :lol:

LURKER

March 15th, 2010
5:17 pm

@BlackMagicWoman…..Naw I’m talking stomach sixpac, plus characteristics you would enjoy! :wink: :smile:

Roy Sheppard

March 16th, 2010
8:39 am

fascinating posts on this. We’re probably taking about the ‘look league’ – why does a hot woman want to be with a wimpy guy – it could be really simple – he treats her well and with respect. Heard a story recenty of a male model here in the UK who was always dating stunning women, until one day he met and fell in love with an older woman (of 7 years) who wasn’t tall and slim. they are now married. It does happen :-) Looks really aren’t that important for anyone who has the sense to see past that. It’s all about that combination of friendship, passion and commitment. looks become irrelevant if you want a REAL relationship rather than someone to ’show off’ to your friends!

I’m particularly interested all this because I’ve been writing a book called “How to be The One” – there’s a no sign up download of the first chapter for anyone who wants it at http://www.BeTheOneBook.com. I’d love to hear what anybody thinks.