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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Empire State of Mind

Jay-Z picked the perfect weekend to perform in Atlanta.  I went to his concert last Saturday (great show) and tomorrow, I am headed to New York for the first time ever.  His show definitely put me in an “empire state of mind!” To say that I am excited would be an understatement!

This is the closest I’m ever going get to the whole “Carrie Bradshaw” thing, so I am curious to check out the NY dating scene.  I’ve only really known dating in Atlanta, so getting a chance to observe how different/similar the lay of the land is will be very interesting!

I heard about a female blogger from New York who is headed on a dating blitz in different cities. I wish I could say I was that adventurous! This young lady has an eight city line-up and she will stop in our fair city next week! I wonder what sort of things she will discover about dating in different zip codes?

Have you ever compared the Atlanta dating scene to other cities?  In your own experiences, how do you think we stack up to other places? Do you have single friends in other cities that share their dating misadventures with you?  Do they face the same challenges that you do?

If you have been to New York, what places would you recommend to someone who will be there just for the weekend?

460 comments Add your comment

Dan - my invented truth

March 4th, 2010
8:28 am

Good morning,

Having friends across the country the lamentations are usually the same across the board.

It ain’t got nothing to do with the city per se, more about age, attitude, and the reason people “date”. From the Chi, to NYC, LA, to Denver, TX to DC, same refrain.

(Dan offers an apology for fuggin up “freaky friday”: my bad)

Lady J

March 4th, 2010
8:33 am

awwww this should be a fun cute blog day!!!!!! Morning Crew!

With many transplants in the city I feel Atlanta embrace various forms of dating….you have some who come here and try to change up their small town dating style but for the most part dating is just that no matter the location….I think….I have been to New York several times but not to date perse but I love the idea really do….

Have you ever compared the Atlanta dating scene to other cities? I feel Atlanta is the single spot to mix and mingle….When I visit SC and NC I feel the pressure of young couples that are married that I should be too bc most are really and don’t have much of a single scene I think…That is one reason I won’t pick up and move bc the options to do more single things are more available…..

In your own experiences, how do you think we stack up to other places? I feel single people flock to Atlanta to mix and mingle….I have yet to do Huston or Dallas but I here great things as well…

Do you have single friends in other cities that share their dating misadventures with you? Not really they make it seems it’s not a big issue bc folk commit more than they do here

Do they face the same challenges that you do? My other friends for the most part are married or in LTR in other areas

princessnik

March 4th, 2010
9:00 am

I agree with Dan

Hey Lady J!

Lady J

March 4th, 2010
9:02 am

hey princessnik

SlimOne...just call me Nicety!

March 4th, 2010
9:07 am

Good morning…sort of disappointed that today was not Friday. :-(

Luvbug

March 4th, 2010
9:13 am

Dan – Freaky Friday was made up (more than double) yesterday. Wet Wednesday…Hump Day…something like that. If you venture to recap, do it at your own risk. Keep Lysol on hand.

No, I’ve never compared the Atlanta dating scene to that of other cities, but I have visited other places and felt more comfortable. The same happens here. I like certain towns/neighborhoods more than others. Some areas I find more family oriented and others more singles oriented. To add to that, each area has it’s own personality (culture, tolerance, energy).

I am a LITTLE guilty of assuming people’s compatibility with me based on the areas they frequent, enjoy and/or frown upon. I’m trying to kick the habit, but it’s hard because my instincts are often dead right.

Raqi

March 4th, 2010
9:14 am

I have cousins that live in other cities and it’s all the same. A place does not make the difference.

I have only been to NewYork once and that was strictly on personal business. I did not have a chance to tour the city and see all the bright lights. I would like to some day. Have good trip WiseDiva.

Lady J

March 4th, 2010
9:17 am

luvbug I agree with your post…..

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 4th, 2010
9:23 am

Little Italy for lunch, but remember refills of beverages are not free (ask me how I know ;-(

Empire State Bldg at dusk.

Madison Ave window shopping if a pretty day.

Phantom at the Majestic Theater

If with fun friends, Madame Tussaud’s Wax Museum is a blast. All f the figures are set so you can take your picture with them so dress accordingly. I have a great shot of me kicking Lance Armstrongs A$$ in a bicycle race…and having my hand in an inaapropriate place for our current Secretary of State, accident for sure.

Thought provoking, but definitely “Ground Zero” (I stood on top of the Twin Towers years ago and my feelings still run very deep toward a certain Muslim).

Definitely the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island…take a look around at the people admiring the Statue of Liberty, how many are obviously foreign born.

Harbor cruise at nioght if you have time.

Central Park.

Magnolia Bakery in the Village (best cupcakes in the world…”Friends”)

Food is dayum near wonderful everywhere you go.

Walk part of the way over the Brooklyn Bridge and that wharf area next to it…both nice.

Of all of the above…my favorites are Little Italy and the Statue of Liberty.

Raqi

March 4th, 2010
9:26 am

Luvbug, I do agree about certain cities and locations being more family versus singles oriented. Just up here where I live there are more family oriented venues that in downtown Atlanta.

It’s a lot quieter up here the closer you get to our neighborhood. But when I lived in Marietta I lived in a busier area of the city. Just like if I lived closer to downtown. And I assume that to be the case no matter what city or state you live in.

Just this morning we were listening to the news where the guy from GSU got shot in a possible drug related crime. One of neighbors made the comment that the reason she left Kansas City was to get away from those type of instances. Not ever having been to or lived in Kansas you would think it is a much quieter tamer place. But from that lady’s statement it’s every where. Just like misadventures in dating and/or relationships.

Luvbug

March 4th, 2010
9:26 am

Lady J- What’s interesting (and I’m sure it happens everywhere)…you can land in two completely different cultures at the end of one mile long street.

Guys are so different on each end…but are they really? They may be just visiting like me.

Cool Shadow

March 4th, 2010
9:29 am

Same drama, different zip codes. There may be locales where dating (mis)adventures are better/worse than others based on hearsay, perceived reputations and personal experiences. There are attitudes about what regions may have prettier women, the difficulty/ease of establishing relationships, the dearth of dating quality, etc. But drama has a way of transcending city, county and state boundaries thanks to the advancement of travel and technological communication mediums.

Luvbug

March 4th, 2010
9:29 am

Raqi – Yeah,I saw that on the news. You could see the disappointment in her face. It’s everywhere. I guess people have to find their niche and that takes time.

Lady J

March 4th, 2010
9:29 am

yep raqi and luvbug….true!

DreamsMaterialize

March 4th, 2010
9:31 am

Morning
I’ve lived in Boston, Detroit, Charlotte, LA, Austin, and Atlanta.
With that said, dating in Atlanta is like dating in most other cities. Now, dating in a rural or significantly less populated area is a bit different…not much to do so people tend to do a lot more fuggin for recreation. lol

Detroit (The D) was a little different though.

SexyCool

March 4th, 2010
9:32 am

Wise – Paige Miles kinda reminds me of you. At least on her cutest days.

Rell - P.I.M.P

March 4th, 2010
9:36 am

Have you ever compared the Atlanta dating scene to other cities?

- Yes i have…Atlanta is cool but the dating dynamic as changed. The tolerance of fa ggotry has twisted up the dating scene. The standards are low here now versus other cities. I mean there are more women in the strip club throwing dollars then men and yes i am guilty i was part of that set..but it was wrong

Do you have single friends in other cities that share their dating misadventures with you – Yep, they think atlanta is the land of milk and honey..it is to some degree..but the trash piles have gotten bigger and my arms are a tad bit tired now…I will say that small town america is better at choosing up with less options versus big city girl with plenty of options.

Do they face the same challenges that you do? – Dont think so, most of them are boo’d up with kids and cant spell night life or club anymore..i am 37 and still use that as a form of entertainment….lol.

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 4th, 2010
9:36 am

WD

also can get free Letterman tickets, seems like around 11 AM.

also, if you are really running out of things to do, there is an Italian Ice stand at the edge of Harlem near Columbia U. as you come out of the subway station that is really good ;-)

Raqi

March 4th, 2010
9:38 am

DreamsMat, most other MAJOR cities. Just like the area surrounding the WhiteHouse. You would think the POTUS would be place in a better area, but he is the city.

Every state pretty is the same in the major cities. That’s where it all goes down.

AmazonRed™ - is back ;-)

March 4th, 2010
9:39 am

Hey gang, did ya miss me? Heard it’s been kinda stale around here. :lol:

WiseDiva – I can’t believe you’ve never been to NYC!

Dating in Atlanta is indeed like no other. I enjoy the options you get living here since folks come here from all areas. So you can date a New Yorker without having to live in NY. It’s great.

Rell - yoni master

March 4th, 2010
9:41 am

the band is coming back..its Red

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 4th, 2010
9:41 am

Morning.

I am a transplant and have been in Atlanta for 4 years so I really only know dating in Atlanta in my adult life. I was in a relationship with a girl from NYC. Wise, the competition in NYC is FIERCE. Especially on the Upper Westside. NYC is really the only city that has every culture represented. My friends that have been doing good in dating have been in these cities:

D.C.
Dallas
NYC
Minneapolis
Orlando.

I think we stack up ok but I think we get a pass because it’s Atlanta and you dont have to prove yourself here like other cities.

Wise, some great things you should do while you are in NYC. If you need more spots, let me know.

Shopping:

Spring Street has everything and not alot of crowds.

Eating:

Brunch, you have to go to Calle Ocho. They have great brunch and an unlimited free Sangria Bar (5 reds and 5 whites)
446 Columbus Avenue between 81st and 82nd Streets

Happy Hour

You have to go to Bamboo 52. The best happy hour in NYC. Plenty of young professionals and great drink and food specials.
Bamboo 52
344 West 52nd Street
New York, NY 10019-6283

Soul Food

If you have time, check out Amy Ruth’s for soul food. It’s great and they stay open late.
Amy Ruth’s
113 West 116 Street
New York, NY 10026

Raqi

March 4th, 2010
9:44 am

most of them are boo’d up with kids and cant spell night life or club anymore

Rell, I think that’s because a lot of people tend to gravitate to the OTP areas once boo’d up and ready to have kids. I don’t think it’s the cities, it’s the mindset.

Luvbug

March 4th, 2010
9:45 am

Raqi – To piggy back on the “down hill closer to the hill” do you think it’s harder for young couples to stay together and live in the metro or do you think they have a better chance staying together outside of the city limits?

That seems to be the trend…meet in city…move out of the city

SexyCool

March 4th, 2010
9:45 am

For me, dating in Atlanta has been much like dating in any other place that I’ve lived in as an adult.

Luvbug

March 4th, 2010
9:47 am

Dang…guess we were thinking along the same vein

Leggs

March 4th, 2010
9:47 am

“there is an Italian Ice stand”….haaa, it’s very much winter in NYC!

@WD ~ don’t forget to visit SoHo!

AmazonRed™ - is back ;-)

March 4th, 2010
9:47 am

Dating in other cities I’ve lived in:

Oakland – On campus the ratio of black women to men was crazy, just like in other large cities. The men had their pick and were recycled to death. But at least folks were a little more “conscious.” Live music and outdoor living is supreme there.

Colorado – Actually there were more black men than women due to the huge military presence. I was too young to appreciate it. I thought they were cramping my style talking all that marriage talk when I was only like 22. :lol:

New England – The brothers there were so smart! Every one out there had like a phD but they were all short! I think the lack of sun stunts their grown. :lol:

Atlanta – the melting pot. So many options, everyone’s afraid to chose one.

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 4th, 2010
9:49 am

@Rell

You got a good point fam. I think Atlanta has alot of women number wise but quality wise? We are probably last. We have alot of scandelous females here. There are some good ones here though.

Everyone has been saying Houston has taken Atlanta’s place for the best women. I guess our women have been overtaken by the guy’s in Skinny Jeans and Daisy Dukes….

Also, Alabama has some cool women also.

Leggs

March 4th, 2010
9:49 am

Hey there ARed!

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 4th, 2010
9:51 am

@ Leggs … yeah it is winter there, but the key is whether the friggin wind is blowing. You can be walking up the side streets of NYC thinking it is just fine, then round a corner where the wind is hitting you and you think you are being cut to the bone. Coldest wind one can imagine sometimes.

Raqi

March 4th, 2010
9:52 am

Luvbug, while some may use it as an excuse I don’t buy it. Either you are going to be together or you are not. Heck a rat can find a hole whether he is in field or in the city. It’s not the area it’s the character and mindset of the person.

It’s really sad to think that a person cannot discipline themselves enough and have enough respect for their relationship and spouse to be able to live or go any place in this world. If you have a man and you have to remove him from the “metro” to keep him faithful you are with the wrong man. And I guarantee you if it’s in him to stray he will do it even living in the Land of Oz.

DreamsMaterialize

March 4th, 2010
9:54 am

Dating in LA was funny too. Everyone wants to be “in the industry” so everyone is angling to find out who you know. The first thing people want to know when they meet you is “what do you do?”

In Detroit, there was sort of a blue collar mentality, and the factories ruled. You could go to an upscale place, and factory workers would be in there with execs. They were pretty much on the same level in Detroit.

In NYC there is a crowd of chicks who are hung up on dating IB’s (Investment Bankers).

ARed What’s the deal woman? How have you been?

Luvbug

March 4th, 2010
9:55 am

Raqi- I agree

Raqi

March 4th, 2010
9:55 am

And Luvbug, one of the biggest reason for moving out of the city is for better school districts and traffic. I hate going to downtown Atlanta. I hate the traffic. And most of the schools system suck.

Leggs

March 4th, 2010
9:57 am

@Randy ~ nothing like the Hawk slapping you in the face. Feels like you got slapped in the face with a piece of glass!

AmazonRed™ - is back ;-)

March 4th, 2010
9:58 am

Thanks for the welcome. Hey there Leggs and Dreams.

Dreams – I’ve been good. Big thangs poppin. I won’t have time to camp out here like I used to, but I can at least poke my head in more! ;-)

Melo

March 4th, 2010
9:58 am

Have you ever compared the Atlanta dating scene to other cities?

Good morning!

The club scene in London England is packed with older(40+) white women pining for black dizzle.Its a phine buffet of swiss pudssy mignon over there,no kidding.

Otherwise dating shld be the same in all major cities, except ofcourse if u coming from a small town.
I think the chics from small towns get smothered in Atlanta if they aint careful..There are a lot of fake movers in Atlanta,esp if u frequent the mixers scene. Ofcourse the strip joints add a flavor to Atlanta that aint in the small towns and that can be exciting.

Talking of NY,I was thinking about that this same thang morning too coz I aint never been there and this may be a good time to go since we got some ching cnuing to blow,hop on the plane on friday nite or saturday morning and come back sunday afternoon….I am gon to pitch that idea to the Queen!

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 4th, 2010
9:59 am

@ M.dot

Thanks for your notes to WD. That Calle Ocho is a name I will remember. I love Sangria, and really good Tapas bars (you did not say it, but it sounded like it might be one).

Rell - yoni master

March 4th, 2010
9:59 am

@luvbug..it only gets hard when home is hard..like the saying goes the only thing wrong with marriage is the couple

my list of places

Naha City JA/Tokyo – Umm I was a comedian/NFL/NBA/RAPPER…i had fun and the mix of races over there was crazy..had the time of my life.

San Diego – Plenty of women and i had my pick…where i picked up my sweet tooth for latina’s…aww the memories of a sunday at mission beach..minus the bloods lol

Williamsburg Va – Yea like the name says – Options are limited. But the rest of Va is cool..its the state for lovers..nuff said

Atlanta – History!

Raqi

March 4th, 2010
10:00 am

Everyone wants to be “in the industry

DreamsMat, isn’t that a third of the residence in NewYork? They go there chasing their dreams. That seldom materialize. (LOL)

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 4th, 2010
10:00 am

Thoughts on some Cities I have been to:

Minneapolis-Lots of options but the interracial effect has taken over totally. If you want to switch sides, go here.

Chicago-You have to look to hard to find someone compatiable, but if you are patient then go ahead.

Dallas-Cool women and lots of options. Not as materialistic as Atlanta.

San Diego-Mixed crowd but everyone seemed just super laid back.

NYC-The most diverse city of the bunch and lots of options.

Tampa-Young party crowd, people didnt really seem super serious about dating.

LA-Status driven, but if you are into that, cool!

London-Reminded me alot of NY, and you really have to be in the know. After a while, it got better.

Memphis-The memphis women were cool. They were real down home with a little city in them.

DreamsMaterialize

March 4th, 2010
10:01 am

That seems to be the trend…meet in city…move out of the city
Luvbug I think this mostly for quality of life, not fidelity. If you move outside the city you generally get more house/land for you money, better schools, safer neighborhoods, and less traffic. These things aren’t as much of a consideration when you’re single, but they are THE PRIORITY once you have a family.

AmazonRed™ - is back ;-)

March 4th, 2010
10:03 am

Guys I date know I don’t do the burbs! I’m a city slicker!

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 4th, 2010
10:03 am

@ Raqi

My daughter went to a drama school on the upper East Side for awhile. NYC in all respects including dating is a VERY COMPETITIVE environment. I think I am too dayum lazy to fight that hard for attention.

Rell - yoni master

March 4th, 2010
10:04 am

@M…..true, what is funny to me is when i may meet someones girlfriend/wife…i just keep my mouth closed…specially if she lived in the atl during 95-2000…i was heavy on the scene then and my eyes have seen things…This has happen to me recently where a co-worker of mine was introducing his lady around the office..umm you should have seen her face when she got introduced to me….lol…i was like nice meeting you and keep it moving…i am not going to hate on someone come up..

Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)

March 4th, 2010
10:07 am

@ M.dot

I agree on London and NYC as you indicated. Unlike say a California gal, women in London and NYC are kind of difficult to approach. Cali girls are imminently approachable.

Melo

March 4th, 2010
10:08 am

@Rell??

umm you should have seen her face when she got introduced to me

So u and her had a (wild?) connection to ur past :???: :lol:

M. (pronouced M dot)

March 4th, 2010
10:09 am

@Randyt

Calle Ocho is cool and a latin spot. I may be in NYC next month.

Harlem has good spots to, Jimbo’s is great for a quick bite.

@ Wise

The BEST pizza in NYC is Grimaldis. They are right under the brooklyn bridge. It looks like the Cosby Show neighborhood. The wait will be crazy, they dont sell slices, they dont deliver, and they dont take credit cards. Great Pizza.

Steak

Peter Luger’s is the #1 Steak for 26 years in a row. If you can get a reservation…

Rio De Janeiro was cool and the people loved to party when I was there. 4, 5 am!

Rell - yoni master

March 4th, 2010
10:09 am

@Rand/M..i agree cali women were super cool and usually down for whatever…but it had to be fun…that was easy. When i arrived in atlanta the whole notion i had to take a women for something to eat was hard to swallow…i did not have to do that in cali..if i did it was either seafood or burrito’s they were more into having fun then stuffing there face..so money was spent on events or lil trips..not FOOD…lol