There’s no escaping it now. We are only 48 hours away from the most hated/loved “hallmark holiday” ever.  If you’re in the throes of a “new” romance, you’re probably considering this weekend as the “right time” for the first time.  It’s not all your fault – between the sappy love songs, mushy commercials, and hoopla associated with Valentine’s day, your defenses are down! Before you get swept away in the moment, let’s get our  Love Squad  back to weigh in on today’s topic:

Is a woman doomed to casual status indefinitely if she decides to hook up with a potential boyfriend?

Daniel, 27, Atlanta. Longest relationship: “10 months and counting”:

“I’d say if you’re looking for an actual relationship of the reasonably-solid variety, hooking up early in the deal will not help your case. Guys enjoy a challenge, and a girl who doesn’t casually give it up presents an interesting challenge. She makes a guy choose whether he’s interested in her, or generic booty. A girl’s stock as …

Continue reading Love Squad Weighs In: Timing the First Time »

There is no denying that, based on our modern-day dating  habits, it’s definitely not your parent’s dating scene. Our parents required the young man to come to the door.  Some think those were the good ol’ days and maybe we could benefit from bringing some of those rituals back.  You don’t see large number of dates arranged with pick-ups from home.  Are you for or against this old-school move?  Our wonderful Love Squad is back to weigh in on today’s topic:

Should we bring back the days of picking up dates? Does it always have to be the guy?

Daniel, 27, Atlanta. Favorite date destination: Piedmont Park:

“I’m for the old-school approach.  Guys: At every opportunity, try to make your date feel special. Open the car door. Pull out her chair for her. Be on time. And come to the door! There’s a reason your dad did it, and his dad before that. It’s a subtle sign of respect.”

Elizabeth, 30, Atlanta. Favorite date destination: Quiet not-too-fancy but still sophisticated dinner or …

Continue reading The Love Squad: Meet Up or Pick up? »

Valentine’s Day is almost here, folks, and there’s no better time to get some real-life perspectives from those who are knee-deep in a relationship, or have been there and actually want to go back. We’ve assembled a panel to give us their no-holds-barred opinions about love, life and the pursuit of coupledom.

So let me introduce the Love Squad as they tackle today’s topic: Your “best ex” resurfaces in your life. They are saying all the right things. Do you take them seriously? Should you?

Daniel, 27, Atlanta. Favorite love song: “Love Your Love The Most,” Eric Church:

“That totally depends on your ex’ sincerity. The key is whether the other person really wants to get back together because he (or she) misses YOU. If your ex just misses the nice feelings or benefits of being in a relationship (with somebody…anybody!), that is a problem. If you decide it’s a good idea to get back together, first sit down with your ex and figure out what went wrong the first time. …

Continue reading The Love Squad: What About Your Ex? »

The best time to showcase your personality could be at an intimate gathering.  I’m all for mix and mingling at large events, but there is something really cool about meeting people at a small dinner party or mellow house party.  Unfortunately, if you aren’t a friendly or positive person, you could actually run off potential dates in this kind of social setting.

One of my bootcamp buddies, Tim, told me that he met a young woman Sunday night at a friend’s house.  He noticed her almost right away, described her as very attractive.  It wasn’t long before he started hearing a lot of what she was saying to people.  It was mostly complaints and whining about the Superbowl, the food, and whatever else she didn’t like.  Major turn-off.  I wondered if there were other women there who had great attitudes, were actually watching the game, and probably wouldn’t bite his head off if he said something to him.

When I asked him who else caught his attention, he couldn’t really think of …

Continue reading Attitude: Approach with caution »

I am really thankful that I am not a celebrity. Seriously, who could endure living the life in a fishbowl. You are constantly under scrutiny and when you are dating, it seems to be worse.  A lot of the gossip blogs were posting rumors about Atlanta-based actor, Lance Gross and his fiancee, actress/model Eva Pigford.  It seems  a few people witnessed Eva angrily leaving Miami and when Lance was surrounded by, uh excited fans.

Who knows what actually happened on Superbowl weekend but it made me think of couples who go out together.  A lot of my guy friends have this unspoken rule of leaving their women at home when they know there will be hot women around.  Events such as Superbowl weekend, or Vegas weekends to see a fight, should be reserved for male bonding (read: no women allowed).

Do you think that taking someone you are in a relationship with to a place where you will be surrounded by “temptations” is a good idea?  Would it bother you if you were out on the town …

Continue reading Take Sand to the Beach Causes Friction »

It’s finally here! SuperBowl XLIV this Sunday, February 7th.  If you don’t have any plans to attend a Superbowl party, please make some! Dating and sports go together like baby and pacifiers (word to ODB).  If you happen to be a sports fan you know that watching The Game is fun, intense, frustrating, and any other emotion that gets the blood pumping.  Somehow this creates conditions conducive to flirt – trust me on this.  I’m sure there is some scientific reason for it but the important thing to remember is you can capitalize off it this weekend. Find thee way to a sports bar or superbowl party this weekend!

If you are in to sports and you meet someone who is not, a great way to get closer is showing them how much fun sports can be.  It can be a way to gauge if the person is open to new things and learning more about you.  It is always good to be upfront with people you date about how hardcore you are about sports.  Hopefully they will be understanding and won’t give …

Continue reading Dating and Sports »

I once read “The chief cause of failure and unhappiness is trading what we want most for what we want at the moment. One of our readers sent me an article about a book that I had seen making its rounds in social networking, Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Right Enough.

When I first heard about Ms. Gottlieb, she had written an article with the same premise in The Atlantic. I blogged about the article, and I see the article was precursor for the book, and now there’s word that a movie deal is in the works.

Here’s the thing, I’ve figured out that insecurity (especially female) is a billion dollar industry.  It’s easy to get caught up in the craze of books, movies, and other forms of mass media (including dating blogs!). I think the most important thing everyone should remember is having standards is normal.  Having unrealistic, fairytale fantasies is a recipe for disaster.

When you start the slippery slope of calling someone “good enough” or the ever so narcissistic …

Continue reading Settling: Twisted Logic? »

In the last few months, I feel as if I have either read or watched some random relationship guru tell single women just about everything we have to let go to have a man.  An ongoing theme seems to be that women aren’t all that realistic about what they want.  It’s debatable how true this really is in general.  I can honestly say that this doesn’t seem to be the case with many of the single people I know.  Is chivalry and generosity too much to ask for though?

I think men and women can agree that being with a person who is giving and generous is a huge turn on. Of course, a lot of people think that chivalry and generosity is only related to finances.  I think that it relates to more than that. A bargain hunting, practical, smart with his money -  man is Grade A hot.  These are the guys that will make you swoon with their intellect and financial acumen, all the while finding ways to romance you.  This is what I call a keeper.

However, in my experiences, a guy who was …

Continue reading Chivalrous and Generous? Yes, Please! »

If you have ever been really excited about meeting someone great, you probably have dealt with that person’s curve balls.  Those completely unexpected, totally out of left field tidbits of information that are somewhat “game changers” in dating.  That is not to say that you shouldn’t still be excited, but the curve balls sort of puts things in perspective, really fast.

I have a lot of experience with these curve balls. I’ve dodged them and I have thrown a few of my own, because hey, I have a past like everybody else.  The most important thing I learned is that you have to be mindful of how you handle curve balls. Whether you are on the receiving end or the one throwing them.

If you handle situations with maturity and finesse, you can pretty much coast through the biggest curve balls.  Drama and angst is optional, not required.  If you happen to have something to reveal to someone, try to do it at the right time.  Don’t pick a time when you are distracted or in bed to do …

Continue reading Curve Balls »

Alright, so by now you have heard the tired old time honored axiom “Why buy the cow, when the milk is free”.  I have always been convinced that a male came up with this phrase. I just don’t want to believe that any self-respecting woman would compare women and all they offer in marriage to cow and cow’s milk.

The argument here is so problematic, I actually don’t know where to start, but for discussion purposes I want to opine about two points:

1. Shouldn’t men oppose the idea that sex is the only real benefit to marriage? Especially when so many complain that sex is the one thing that greatly changes post-marriage?

2. This expression doesn’t address how cows (women?) benefit from milk (sex?) in a way that makes it all worthwhile.

My dear readers, are you in agreement with the idea that men won’t marry as long as they have heifers (har!) who give it up freely, without commitment?

If every single (and married?) woman suddenly closed for “free business”, would there be a hike in …

Continue reading Free Milk Everywhere »