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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Do you want me?

If someone could find a way to manufacture a crystal ball for relationships, they would be very rich.  Unfortunately, we are left to our own devices of over analyzing or misreading signals.  In the first couple of weeks, you can at least be sure that there is an attraction.  You are returning calls, agreeing to meet up, and making yourself available.  It’s the sweetest part because it’s all clear.

Then there is that period of time where one or both of you have decided how you feel about each other.  You don’t want to play yourself so you start looking to take your cues from the other person.  The problem is, they are doing the exact same thing.  So how do you know they want you as much as you want them?

Personally, I try to wait it out one until the ambiguous behavior goes away.  Sometimes, it doesn’t and I get the message and move on.  What do you do? Do you let the person know how much you want them? Are you comfortable bringing it up in a talk?

Is it important to have the same level of interest in order for it to work?

Of course men and women express their interest and desires differently sometimes.  Ladies, when do you know a man wants you as much as you want him? Men, how do you determine a woman is on the same page with you and what you want?

282 comments Add your comment

princessnik

February 23rd, 2010
11:03 am

@ my two men~ often tell you EXACTLY what they want of you, but we choose to analyze it until it becomes what we want

so true

Professor...

February 23rd, 2010
11:07 am

um….not to be funny and way off topic but do folks wearing jerri curls realize that look is out of style (thinking this as someone with Jerri curls walks past me)

Hey I am loved! Those folks wearing Jerri curls, California curls, S-curls etc are just trying to blend and they look foolish…hahaha

Melo that was a daamn good post…I am raising my glass to you!

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
11:09 am

Professor: all I can think of when see her walk by is “….so let your soul glow…..”

Look at the pic: http://www.soupytrumpet.com/images/soul-glo.gif

Professor...

February 23rd, 2010
11:14 am

I am loved, girl you must be my cousin or something I think the same thing too when I see them! Oh yea about three years ago this lady came in asking my hairstylist to do her curl. My stylist said I don’t think they sell the curl stuff at my beauty supply store…the lady said oh I already have it with me because I know y’all don’t keep it at the shops and stuff. I was :shock: because that is a sign no one is wearing them if the product is never there, because we know that soul glow is not selling out

princessnik

February 23rd, 2010
11:16 am

@ Professor………..the lady said oh I already have it with me because I know y’all don’t keep it at the shops and stuff.

I probably would have passed out laughing so hard

princessnik

February 23rd, 2010
11:17 am

I AM Loved/Professor ya’ll got me seeing that moment in coming to america where the people get up from the sofa and have left three curl stains LOLOL

kimmie

February 23rd, 2010
11:18 am

Morning Gang!

I’ve found that if a guy is truly interested, you don’t have to question things. It will be very apparent thru actions and even the shyest guys will let you know verbally too. My SO made his interest and his intentions very clear from jump. No guessing games.

In looking over my past relationships, when I had to “decipher” and try to “figure things out”, I was really being played. The guy was deliberately trying to keep me off balance. Not only that, the atmosphere was such that I was uncomfortable communicating my feelings or even asking what was up.

In the situation I am in now, I am not apprehensive. I am not afraid of “scaring him off”. When you feel that way, that’s your intuition, God, etc, telling you that things are not right. You should not have to walk on eggshells, especially if there has been sufficient time and not on the 1st date!

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
11:19 am

@ Professor………..the lady said oh I already have it with me because I know y’all don’t keep it at the shops and stuff. :shock:

ALOL!!!!!!

LL411

February 23rd, 2010
11:23 am

The ex has agreed to meet me tomorrow for exchange of goods. Did you talk dude into meeting you? I’ve been out of the loop a minute, but I thought the stuff was either going in the trash, or the mail or the attic…

kimmie

February 23rd, 2010
11:24 am

Those curl chemicals smell like they ought to be strong as battery acid and burn thru somebody’s head! That’s such a disgusting style!

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
11:25 am

For the ladies: Ever notice that your single girlfriends are the most harsh if a guy doesn’t treat you the way you want to be treated?
He may have other qualities that are good but that one thing he did that messed up will have your girlfriends saying ” ah hell naw girl, let him go, don’t call him, etc!!!

Ever notice how the more open you are to allow a man mkae up for his mistake, you end up with more dates and possible marriage while your single friends stay, single?

Daily bread: don’t always listen to your single friends. there may be a reason why they stay single.

Professor...

February 23rd, 2010
11:25 am

Princessnik it was difficult holding it in, and the way she said it all huffy puffy with a lot of attitude made it really funny.

kimmie

February 23rd, 2010
11:26 am

I am – Is it a situation where you live in a house and he could just drop the stuff off and/or you guys mail each other’s stuff, so you won’t have to see each other?

SlimOne...just call me Nicety!

February 23rd, 2010
11:28 am

I am….that’s why it’s not the best idea to share too many negative aspects of your relationship with other people. They are outside looking in the window that you, maybe unknowingly, are setting for them. For whatever reason, negativity tends to outweigh the positives on many issues. It can take 12 positives to combat one single negative issue.

lurker

February 23rd, 2010
11:29 am

I AM LOVED – Ever notice that your single girlfriends are the most harsh if a guy doesn’t treat you the way you want to be treated?

That’s why you NEVER do the “tell all.” You have to make decisions for yourself. Half are just mad, so some things will need to be kept private. There’s only so much you share. The rest should ALWAYS be kept between the two parties involved. Even if it’s a bust and you’re resolved to walk, it’s private still.

lurker

February 23rd, 2010
11:30 am

I AM LOVED….I received flowers last week. You should have seen the HUGE question mark on my friend/coworker’s face. I was grinning on the inside like, nope I ain’t tell you. It’s nonya. LOL

lurker

February 23rd, 2010
11:31 am

….and because of that I removed the card….folks are dang nosey

kimmie

February 23rd, 2010
11:33 am

I am – You really should make it a practice to not listen to people that give bad and/or unwarranted advice, single or married! I’ve had married folk give me horrible advice.

Only share your business with one or 2 people whose advice you respect and who are not only talking the talk, but walking it too.

Everyone, not just single friends, but family members too, only remember the bad, no matter how small, when you have long forgiven your mate for the offense. Don’t fault them for that, I think we’ve all been guilty of it. If it’s a minor enough offense, they’ll eventually come around. A lot of times, though, folks on the outside can see things you can’t see, or they just get a bad vibe. If it’s someone you respect, it may be worth at least considering. I can’t count the number of times friends and families have told me they didn’t feel right about a guy I was seeing, but didn’t want to say anything and let me come to the conclusion myself.

But sitting around telling your business to some nosey, misery-loves-company friends – that’s a bad, high school move.

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
11:35 am

Kimmie: In the situation I am in now, I am not apprehensive. I am not afraid of “scaring him off”. When you feel that way, that’s your intuition, God, etc, telling you that things are not right. You should not have to walk on eggshells, especially if there has been sufficient time and not on the 1st date!

Preach on sista!

Professor...

February 23rd, 2010
11:36 am

Princess…I am loved started this mess! Not to mention that soul glo ad she posted.

@Kimmie I agree with you. Those relationships that are not good for you it seems like you are “walking on eggshells” trying not to nag, or say what is making you feel a certain way. I am so glad the early to mid 20s are behind me…that is when those things took place in my life.

I am loved…I have one single friend I refuse to listen to or mention a relationship in convo to her. We have been friends forever, but she will go crazy on a man. I happened to see her out once and I was on a date…well she hung around trying to see and hear what we were talking about. She later told me she wanted to see how he looked when the check came for our meal. She called me later that night and said he was a player, and when I asked her why she thought that she said he looked like this guy we both knew. She is always single, and when she is dealing with a guy she always say I just need my needs met I don’t want him for real. However she is the main one driving by his house and checking his phone. Now she is cool on other levels to kick it with etc., but she will dog a man out.

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
11:37 am

Hey Hey Hey everyone, I don’t tell all!

I’m just saying! I have a few close friends and man they can be harsh!
Some of their advise can be harsh but I follow the beat of my own drum.
I’ve also learned that those that are happily married give the best advise :-) (in my case anyway)

princessnik

February 23rd, 2010
11:39 am

@ I am Loved……..Ever notice that your single girlfriends are the most harsh if a guy doesn’t treat you the way you want to be treated?

Misery loves company honey, and not to mention women as a whole tend to hate on each other, they wanna floss when they have, and pull you down when they don’t.

Lurker said it rather nicely “There’s only so much you share. The rest should ALWAYS be kept between the two parties involved.”

Let us not forget that “The clean up woman” does still exist

princessnik

February 23rd, 2010
11:40 am

@ Lurker……and because of that I removed the card….folks are dang nosey

too funny my mom did the same thing I sent her some thanks/just because flowers and she said her office was trying so hard to see where they came from

princessnik

February 23rd, 2010
11:42 am

I am loved…..”I’ve also learned that those that are happily married give the best advise ”

if you are going to seek advice, seek advice of people who are where you want to be, people who have your best interest at heart

kinderbabe

February 23rd, 2010
11:42 am

good morning all.:) hope everyone is well this morning

Professor...

February 23rd, 2010
11:44 am

Let us not forget that “The clean up woman” does still exist

Yes Ma’am they exist…good point

kimmie

February 23rd, 2010
11:45 am

I am – You don’t have to “tell all” to some. They are the kind that are just ready to pounce! Feed those with a long-handled spoon.

One of my married, but very nosey & opinionated friends was over my house. Me & my SO had been dating for about 6 months. I called him for something, he was not available, so I left a message. I knew he was out with his kids to a movie or something, so I was not worried that he was out of pocket, and I’m not the clingy type anyway. About an hour & a half passed and he had not called back. I was still not worried. Well, my friend was. She told me that was a bad sign and don’t be surprised or disappointed if things didn’t work out with him. I completely ignored her. She came to that negetive conclusion on her own, even though all she did was overhear me leaving a message.

lurker

February 23rd, 2010
11:46 am

Princessnik – Funny too, she walked up unexpectedly and was taken aback…why? Right, because you don’t know all you think you know. Heck the stuff we chuck it up about is ONLY surface. She’s got access to my floor so I politely removed the minute she walked away because I sort of got that gut feeling that she’d be back.

Tell your mom we are here <> <>

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
11:51 am

LL411 : I had his stuff stored where I wouldn’t have to look at it.
Lst week, he sent me a text saying he wants his key back because “he met someone that meets his needs”

Kimmie: rather meet him in public to do the swap. His idea and I’m cool with it. I don’t want him to come to house, my son is there.

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
11:53 am

Lurker: I’m happy you got flowers :-)

kimmie

February 23rd, 2010
11:55 am

I don’t want him to come to house, my son is there.

Okay, gotcha!

Leggs

February 23rd, 2010
11:56 am

Interesting topic….how do you know when someone wants you. Went out Sat. night and 3 men gave me their numbers. Yep, I took 2 of them. One has been calling and texting since Sun morn. However, one of his texts asked me to send him a WOW picture. I asked what a WOW pic was, but had an idea. He sent me a pic of him barechested with just a hint of pubic hair showing. What a turnoff so early in the game.

Leggs

February 23rd, 2010
11:56 am

Hello, i am loved, good to read you.

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
11:57 am

princessnik : I do!!!
The best way to be rich is to learn from rich people.
Poor can’t get rich following the advise of poor people!

I’m just grateful GOD has blessed me with the ability to treat men with kindness and not try to be harsh, snap on them, etc….
As they say, you attract bees with honey.

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
11:59 am

waving at Leggs: Hey shuga!!!!

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
12:00 pm

ut-oh! I’m in trouble….some dude texting me and I can’t remember who he is :shock:

Professor...

February 23rd, 2010
12:04 pm

He sent me a pic of him barechested with just a hint of pubic hair showing.

:shock:
:???:
:shock:
:mrgreen:
:shock:
:mrgreen:
:shock:

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
12:04 pm

Leggs : I got you beat.

Nice dude I met once sent me a dick pic. :shock:
I was so turned off

Melo

February 23rd, 2010
12:04 pm

He sent me a pic of him barechested with just a hint of pubic hair showing

Leggs??

I assume this is a man about ur age,smewhat??

I hear about this a lot and it boggles my mind?? :lol:

Men using wangs to woo women?? :???: :-) :roll:

Does this man behavior appeal to some women?? (really wanna know)

kimmie

February 23rd, 2010
12:05 pm

I am – Another thing to consider – my mom used to tell me you never know what’s going on in somebody else’s house. A lot of people talk a good game, about how tough they are and what they would or wouldn’t let so-and-so do, blah, blah, but behind closed doors they are whimpering puppies, they turn into a complete marshmallow.

kimmie

February 23rd, 2010
12:06 pm

Melo – No, it does not appeal to women, but some men are just stupid.

Professor...

February 23rd, 2010
12:06 pm

I am loved…are you over there BIG pimpin’?

:grin: ….some dude texting me and I can’t remember who he

Professor...

February 23rd, 2010
12:09 pm

Melo, this behavior does not appeal to women at least not some women. Leggs mentioned she met him like Sunday, and today is only Tuesday he is trying to open them “leggs” too soon it is disrespectful and a turnoff.

Leggs did he have a Tyson Bedford chest? Like supa fine :grin:

lurker

February 23rd, 2010
12:10 pm

I AM LOVED…I’m happy you’re happy I got flowers

Professor...

February 23rd, 2010
12:12 pm

Melo would you send a racy picture with your shirt off to a chick you just met?

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
12:13 pm

Leggs: hope he didn’t have taco meet.

Princess: maybe that’s why I’m not so upset to see the ex since I’m over here pimpin , :-D lol

Sunday: dude from 2 years ago still texting me
Monday: dude that I just met that has been emailing gives me the number and is like please please call
Tuesday : Dude who I couldn’t remember who is but just now remembered – is texting me.

Yep! It’s gonna be a great week! :mrgreen:

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
12:15 pm

Lurker: I’m happy you’re happy I’m happy you got flowers!

SlimOne...just call me Nicety!

February 23rd, 2010
12:15 pm

A pub hair pic has nothing on a dude sending a vid of him wacking off with his church socks still on, on a Sunday afternoon!! Buddy ain’t learn nuttin’ in service that day other than how to service himself. LMAO

lurker

February 23rd, 2010
12:16 pm

I AM LOVED…I’m happy that you’re happy that I’m happy that you’re happy I got flowers

I am loved (I guess.....)

February 23rd, 2010
12:18 pm

OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!! COOOOOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKIIIIIIIIIEEEEEE!
My girl scout cookies come today!!!!!

me in a few hours: http://kindkitchen.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/cookie-monster.jpg
nom nom nom nom