No, today’s post title is not related to my dating misadventures! Thankfully, the phase of dating hideous boys ended in my 20s. Brief Interviews with Hideous Men, written by David Foster Wallace (RIP), was a collection of short stories in which men were interviewed about their attitudes and behaviors with women.
The book was adapted into a film of the same name, directed by The Office actor, John Krasinski. I should have read the book first because I would be interested to see more of how David Foster Wallace drew conclusions about masculinity, what it means to be a man, and fatherhood.
A few of the interviews were meant to be humorous, but some were thought-provoking. The film explores the sometimes “dark” male interactions with women. What struck me most was the kind of emotions that actually drove their behavior. I know some men like to proclaim that they are simple in their wants and needs. I can’t argue that point much, but I would take it further and say that the things that shape a man’s desires, attitudes, and behavior can be quite complex. Would you agree?
Do you think women should put more effort in exploring the character of the men they date? We can figure out what he likes to eat, what makes him get turned on, or what his favorite sports teams are; but what about what drives him? How can a woman get closer to someone if he is emotionally guarded to the point that he doesn’t find it easy to let people in? Should she give up or be patient?
Guys, can you tell when a woman is looking to really get to know you? Are you generally guarded with women that you date in the beginning? Do you find ways to show her who you truly are? How would she know it?