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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Men of a Certain Age

Last night, TNT premiered it’s new one-hour show, Men of a Certain Age, starring Ray Romano, Andre Braugher, and Scott Bakula.
Men of A Certain Age
Photo Credit: TNT

I haven’t seen the pilot show yet but it certainly looks promising, if just for the peek into a fictional male psyche, alone. There are a lot of things men simply don’t speak about publicly (or to womenfolk): their insecurities, frustrations, or motivation of why they do what they do.

When it comes to getting older, men are notorious for reacting in the most bizarre and outrageous ways*. Hey, I’m not judging, I’m just saying. What is it about getting older that “men of a certain age” seem to struggle with the most?

That will probably be the most captivating part of the show, gaining some insight into what some men have to deal with as they get older. Not to mention, how women and their relationships with us fits into everything.

After dating a younger guy, I admit that there are differences in dating “men of a certain age”  but I wouldn’t necessarily say it is better or worse. In my experience, it seems that the maturity level of a man determines how well (or poorly) he handles a dating relationship. What do you think?

Ladies, have you noticed any differences in dating men in their 20s versus dating men in their 30s, 40s, or 50s? What were they? How did you relate to them in terms of communication?

Guys, is there a particular age that a woman should take a man more seriously when it comes to relationships? How do you think a man’s age impacts his dating behaviors? At what age do men usually change how they relate to women?

*Disclaimer: Of course women react to growing older in bizarre and outrageous ways too. It’s all about the fellas today, though. You’re welcome.

316 comments Add your comment

Beautiful

December 8th, 2009
10:21 am

it snowed here in cali yesterday! :o )

Leggs

December 8th, 2009
10:22 am

I have always admired a salt-n-pepper man. I think he’s sexier than a bald headed man. However, not all gray comes in nicely! Maturity is not necessarily acting your age but instead acting responsibly and honestly with the people you encounter. Maturity is putting the board game of life away and handling situations with as much aplomb as you can muster while always being respectful.

Beautiful

December 8th, 2009
10:23 am

@Dream_n
great example!

Lady J

December 8th, 2009
10:25 am

Leggs great 10:22 post! Well said!

M. (pronouced M dot)

December 8th, 2009
10:29 am

@Ben

“I felt like I had my first “adult” relationship.”

How exactly can we define an adult relationship? I asked because there were times when I dated an older female and I expected things to be a lot more straight forward and with less games right? That was furthest from the truth….the older females were flaking out, playing games, disappearing, etc.

I think as a younger guy, we have to watch out because sometimes older females treat you like a new shiney toy and then throw you to the side. Sometimes, they also just want to see that they still have it and try to compete with younger women. Just to show themselve that they can compete with them still. Then they just keep it moving forward.

Does anyone think relationships with significant age differences can genuinely work? Like more than a 5 year age range?

Regarding older women and younger men I say no because it’s always going to turn to a mother-child relationship. And there will never be an equal level of respect level.

Melo

December 8th, 2009
10:29 am

20 kids Dream_n!!!???

ur great grand, grand parents must have been from southern africa then…possibly zulu,shona or ndebele..

can you and i schedule a DNA..we cld be very close relatives? :lol:

2CPTG......grown azz man!

December 8th, 2009
10:31 am

Dream_n, in reference to ya playboy uncle….he continues to act this way because he’s been allowed to; if he can find a gullible lady to fall for his antics, then he’s going to continue to act this way…..the adage holds true for him,”if it ain’t broke……” and to him, it obviously ain’t broke.

roc

December 8th, 2009
10:33 am

where are all the old guys in this blog?

Leggs

December 8th, 2009
10:34 am

It may not be broke, but bet he is with 20 kids. (Sorry, couldn’t resist)

SlimOne

December 8th, 2009
10:34 am

@Leggs “Maturity is putting the board game of life away and handling situations with as much aplomb as you can muster while always being respectful.”

Love your definition!!!

Leggs

December 8th, 2009
10:34 am

They went to buy some Grecian Formula!

2CPTG......grown azz man!

December 8th, 2009
10:35 am

M., I disagree…….if you allow yourself to be disrespected, then you gon’ be disrespected……be a man, and let ya nutz hang, and I guarantee that shyt’ll stop!

Lady J

December 8th, 2009
10:35 am

@M. (pronouced M dot)I can’t even entertain the the younger guys….Some women love it like I love the NFL!!! LOL

Does anyone think relationships with significant age differences can genuinely work? Like more than a 5 year age range?

I am not sure but want to test the theory….LOL….a 13 yr differnce to me isn’t a whole generation but one is older but I feel with much work and give and take it could just like a normal age realtionship…One has to be less power hungery to be in control though but both experiences should be respected…and not be used agaisnt the younger or older for that matter….Just be secure with yourself and age I say…

Dream_n~ Soaring above the Fray

December 8th, 2009
10:36 am

@ Melo… Yes, 20 or more.. He’s been birthing kids since I can remember. We always makes fun of him b/c we think it would take a school bus to fit all his kids together…

@ 2CPTG.. I also agree. These women are very gullible. I’m sure he doesn’t , come out and tell how may kids he has off top…. but I think even if the women fall for the okie doke, he should be tired. The youngest I know of is 5, a healthy lil sum thing…lol… but he should just give it a rest.

SlimOne

December 8th, 2009
10:36 am

@M. Like I said in my earlier post…having too many generations in between both parties seems like a relationship doomed from the start. I would not want to go outside of that 5yrs age radius, personally!

Dream_n~ Soaring above the Fray

December 8th, 2009
10:39 am

Does anyone think relationships with significant age differences can genuinely work? Like more than a 5 year age range?

M.~~ I believe it can. My ex was 10 years older than I. Now you may laugh and say, he’s your ex so it didnt work… but minus a few obstacles I think it would’ve worked.

MrHughes

December 8th, 2009
10:41 am

I don’t know if it’s just older man = mature man. It’s not like you get a “I’m a mature man” certificate that you can carry around on your wallet because you’ve reached a certain age. I feel like I’ve always been more mature than my peers.

But, that doesn’t mean that I’ve not grown over the last few years. I’m now 31 and did things in previous relationships that I’d frown on now. For example, I when I was younger I prided myself on getting laid as often as possible, but never was one to womanize or cheat on partners. I still love sex, but my goal today isn’t just getting laid. I want more than that! Maturity is all relative. Hopefully, we are all on a journey and striving to be better tomorrow than we were today.

Melo

December 8th, 2009
10:42 am

roc?? how old u gunning for?
Lady J how old are u??

Slimone,i wld say go for the 60 yr old guy..thats less wear and tear..yes tear and more social security for u….

The man jus once to experience a lil more oral,thats all…! :lol:

Dream_n~ Soaring above the Fray

December 8th, 2009
10:44 am

Hopefully, we are all on a journey and striving to be better tomorrow than we were today.

Well said MrHughes…

2CPTG......grown azz man!

December 8th, 2009
10:46 am

who defines “maturity”…..like DK said, and Mr Hughes touched on, it’s all relative….to some, a dude who enjoys his “toys” and loves his bachelor lifestyle could be construed as immature; but to him, he’s content and happy within..So, is up to “us”, the proverbial masses, to determine if he’s mature or not?

Lady J

December 8th, 2009
10:46 am

proud 30 yr old Melo and I know a baby in your eyes but I can hold my own and rock and roll with the best of them and no I can’t even entertain a 29yr old man…I tried and my adult adhd kicked in…I’ve been told by many I have an old soul and far ahead of my age…especially can’t and don’t roll with my age group @ work either…no interest to me…

M. (pronouced M dot)

December 8th, 2009
10:51 am

@Dream_n~ Soaring above the Fray

Interesting point. So question, was there alot of baggage and also how did you handle it?

@SlimOne

I agree with you. Remember we were talking a few weeks ago about how alot of older guys come off as know it alls? I think if they have a couple of years over you, they will always somewhat put you in a “You dont know what you are talking about position” and you should listen to me.

@Lady J

What is your biggest problem with the young guys? Are they not old school enough? They dont want to “court” like the old days?

@2CPTG……grown azz man!

As I told slim, it really wouldn’t be about allowing yourself to be disrespected, I think subconsciously she will maybe think that because she is older, that she has to lead and if she is leading you are following :)

Let me ask you and the blog a question, can an younger guy and an older woman be together and can she genuinely still be submissive? Not a doormat but submissive?

PSA

December 8th, 2009
10:53 am

Heads Up:

AlphaDog sounds like a known Stockbridge-BM, known to ruin blogs.

He is best flat-out ignored.

Melo

December 8th, 2009
10:53 am

no u not a baby Lady J,u st8 with me…

I luv baby back ribs,baby corn,baby potatoes etc..baby comes with many positives,u know that vitality and good good stuff,makes ur Ego go oomph!..so u good! :lol:

2CPTG......grown azz man!

December 8th, 2009
10:58 am

” I think subconsciously she will maybe think that because she is older, that she has to lead and if she is leading you are following

Let me ask you and the blog a question, can an younger guy and an older woman be together and can she genuinely still be submissive? Not a doormat but submissive?”

I’ll say it again, bruh, that woman ain’t gon’ even attempt to “think, feel, or act” like she can get away with certain things if she knows she ain’t dealing with a doormat! If that man handling his “grown man”, and walkin the walk, then she gon’ follow; However, the minute he stops being a leader, he gon’ revert to a follower. Then that just opens up a floodgate for other stuff……

SexyCool - Is ya' happy?

December 8th, 2009
10:59 am

Three Words Daily – Yes. I’m happy.

Dream_n~ Soaring above the Fray

December 8th, 2009
10:59 am

M.

You know what, no. He didnt have alot of baggage from previous relationships. It wasn’t his past that split us, it was anger that divided the relationship. And I’ll leave it at that.. I don’t want people thinking I’m trying to throw him under the bus. But minus the anger situation which was on the forefront of our problems. We were good together. Da!mn good. :wink:

Lady J

December 8th, 2009
11:01 am

yep M just that….I hate to always revert back to my failed marriage but I have to to give this example….It finally came out during the seperation period from my ex husband how he hated the 70s, 80s, and some early 90s music that were played @ our wedding reception….I got n his ass stating none of the music you wanted to play wouldn’teven be with out the Frankie, Luther, Natalie Cole, etc….There was no appreciation and hell no I wasn’t having a hip hop jay z concert @ my reception yeah he’s from Brooklyn….I was raised on that stuff it is in my blood….My dad wasn’t perfect but he did right with making us appreciate music…

And M get out my head….I love to be courted and chilvary isn’t dead it is just lost by many and now you have some 40 yr old men getting away from it bc competion is so fierce that they don’t have to put out bc it is not being demanded…I love that song Treat her like a Lady….I love attention with kind acts from a man and most men my age just don’t have in the blood and I get frustrated bc I feel there should be more of a chase…

Sometimes I just wish I was born in the late 60s early 70s then it to me was a since of pride

Grace

December 8th, 2009
11:01 am

Older men does not = maturity, as there are some older men who act like “boys”. However older men does = to life experience and how they adhere to it will personify their maturity level. I’m not looking forward to dating older men solely because most of the men I’ve met single or divorced over 40 does not want to settle down, raise a family and have a happy, committed relationship. Either the men have been married and don’t want to marry again, or have never been married and don’t intend to in the future, or they’re just looking to have fun. ohh and I’m so tired of hearing “been there done that” too. So what is a girl to do? Date younger and maybe there’s some hope there or should I contiue on my quest and hopefully I will meet an older guy who have muscled up and have left all the past hurt behind ready and willing to venture into something new? At this point I just don’t know…the stain seem to be rubbed completely thru that even spray and wash can’t clean.

Keith

December 8th, 2009
11:02 am

Does anyone know the name of the song that played during the closing credits?

SexyCool - Is ya' happy?

December 8th, 2009
11:03 am

Have dated a men of a certain age, men my age, and men younger. It depends on the man.

As to M.Dot’s submissivity in a younger man/older woman relationship, it depends on the woman….and the man.

TheDude is younger than me by 5 years. Not only does age not even come up with us, I don’t even think about it. He’s a man worthy of submitting to…regardless of the year on his birth certificate.

THE INFAMOUS DK aka DK ALI

December 8th, 2009
11:03 am

People seem to let everything and anything get in the way of whats important. Like you whereever you are.. I like me where I am at this stage and many more to come.. I have a hint of grey in my goatee and in my hair but will I get a silly looking dye job.. Nope.. I know I have a journey and the goal is to keep smiling along the journey. I like where I am now and will continue to like where I am at different stages.. Steady Mobbin.. Ha!

Deb in Kansas

December 8th, 2009
11:04 am

I have to post something this morning because you are talking about a subject that I was very confused about. I am moving on from a very immature guy. I like(d) this 48 year old…very gorgeous. However, he gives me the impression that he likes to jump from one woman to the next. We both work in the same building so you can imagine how delicate of a situation that is. Now, I am hot too for 44, although most think I am in my 30s. We have great chemistry…sparks fly when we are together (well on my part anyway, never asked him about it). But he’s gotta feel it because I have skillz in that area. Anyway, he constantly texts me without calling (how childish, right?). Yeah, I know someone posted a comment last week saying that a guy who texts without calling is empty inside. (Now I know why.) I am currently at the stage of ‘moving on’ from him (this is my third try), but it has only been a week. He is an Aries and I am a Leo so we are constantly both trying to control the situation. He is definitely not mature. I guess he is at the stage that Melo described as panic time. So my mature advice to myself is to ‘keep it moving’. There are other guys in my repertoire but this guys just does it for me. Maybe it is just the challenge.

Timeless

December 8th, 2009
11:05 am

Dream_n, approx how old are you?

Cemeeli

December 8th, 2009
11:08 am

Hey –

Well, after a certain age there is that “set in ways” thing going on. I’ve found some things younger men, do that older men don’t want no parts of…I can appreciate those “ways” as long as he thinks outside the box every now and then.

btw – The only relationship to date that has been the most gross to me is…Morgan Freeman dating his step-grandaughter.

Yea…perv..

Lady J

December 8th, 2009
11:08 am

Thanks Melo!!!!:)

Grace

December 8th, 2009
11:08 am

can an younger guy and an older woman be together and can she genuinely still be submissive? Not a doormat but submissive?” 2CPTG for some but for me, I don’t think so, because it’s going creep up in my head that I’m older and you need to respect your elders… LOL seriously though…

SexyCool - Is ya' happy?

December 8th, 2009
11:08 am

Oh…one thing about dating older men (especially those that want to be players) in addition to sometimes coming across as know it alls, they also have a tendency to think that the can run ‘game’ on you because they think they have all this life experience. Especially if they are a bit older than you.

Oh…and as to the tv show, didn’t watch it. Am not too crazy about that particular type of cinematography choice so it made me not want to see it.

Melo

December 8th, 2009
11:09 am

can an younger guy and an older woman be together and can she genuinely still be submissive?

the way he came into the relationship is how the relationship is gonna be defined.If the woman was aggressive in getting him and he wilingly succumbed to her “kill”,then she may use him however way she wants based on her initial gangster move.Toy, my boy,my youngie etc..Women usually approach younger guys for ceratain specici and targetted goals. :???:
If he made a bold and mature move stepping to an older chic, and she was smitten,she will expect him to continue to lead the way he snatched her and he must…if he falters in that regard,that may cause problems for them,especially her, leading to the demise of the relationship….

Men shuld neva be followers expect for special circumstances..thats for chapter 2…

Qstions class??? :lol:

M. (pronouced M dot)

December 8th, 2009
11:10 am

@Lady J

I know that’s unfortunate because our society is built on instant gratification. Also another thing that young guys are not fond of is the word chase. To me chase is synomous with games. Pursued is one thing but me chasing you around I-285 just to stroke your ego is not cool and I have noticed alot of female in atlanta want to be sweated for ego boosting. They give their phone numbers out, never answer, etc. So chase is not a good analogy…lol

@Dream_n~ Soaring above the Fray

If he got help, would you give him a second chance?

@2CPTG……grown azz man!

I was saying doormat in reference to the woman not the man. Also what if you have a woman who never really had a male figure in her life and never learned how to respect a man? You know she is going to have a natural rebellion so how do manage that 2CPTG……grown azz man! ? You dont go to the boot like Ike do you? lol

Dream_n~ Soaring above the Fray

December 8th, 2009
11:11 am

@ Timeless… approx 2 years above the legal drinking age……

SexyCool - Is ya' happy?

December 8th, 2009
11:11 am

Having lived with a serial texter/cheater, texting and never calling is also a way to manage multiple chicks while thinking your main chick don’t know what’s up.

THE INFAMOUS DK aka DK ALI

December 8th, 2009
11:13 am

Again.. Age aint nothin but a number and gettin down aint nothin but a thang Thanks Aaliyah.. I dont care if she is 50ish (hey Leggs Boo) or if she is 25ish(dream) if you treat me with love honor and respect we are cool.. Everybody wants love no matter how hard we act.. I wanna be loved but its gonna be a great love and nothing else will do. Until then I’ll keep ridin, sidin, whippin and dippin.

Dream_n~ Soaring above the Fray

December 8th, 2009
11:13 am

Having lived with a serial texter/cheater, texting and never calling is also a way to manage multiple chicks while thinking your main chick don’t know what’s up.

And there it is…

M. (pronouced M dot)

December 8th, 2009
11:14 am

@Melo

Well said…

Grace

December 8th, 2009
11:16 am

singing *I’m gonna text that man right outta my hair*

Cemeeli

December 8th, 2009
11:17 am

…never gotta worry about me EVER wanting to lead a man nowhere! Why is it that we have these wanna be alpha-man-women? Forget all that! I am going to be the precious flower that i am.

I am not trying to be above my man…dag.

Lady J

December 8th, 2009
11:17 am

Ok cool but they aren’t even hearing courting so again we are left with nothing bc games go no where for most….I just don’t have time for pulling teeth and dating shouldn’t be that hard bc most don’t change and you will have that same person later down the line….just be who you are and handle it grown woman and man style….if you mulitple date say it…if you want just one say it….if you want to hit it and quit it don’t decide for me ask me…we all do what we want as adults no matter what we type or try to be behind the computer screen or sitting at the bar…Infamous put it out there yesterday the real you will come out and it comes sooner than later these days…

SlimOne

December 8th, 2009
11:17 am

@Melo If i was the gold digger type chick with no type of conscience then I’d go for that 60yr old dude. But I’ve never been that type of person, nor can I force myself to be with someone physically that I can’t stomach…that’s just YUCK! This dude had touched my arm once and I immediately felt the need to shower. LOL!

@M. I of course cannot speak for all, however, any guy friends that I’ve discussed dating an older woman with said it was sort of as if she took the lead…ESPECIALLY if she was well off $$$. They all did say that the women were pretty upfront about what it was they wanted which they appreciated (a break from the game playing normally done by younger folks) as well as whatever tricks or whatnot the chick taught them. I find that men see it not only as getting an older lady but also as an opportunity to add to their bag of tricks. I guess there must be truth that older women go into a Sexual prime period and the men their age cannot seem to hang with their stamina…so they seek out the young tenders to fulfill their needs/desires.

Melo

December 8th, 2009
11:19 am

Anyway, he constantly texts me without calling (how childish, right?

Deb,why are u not simply communicating to him that u dont like texting??

u have great chemistry..so why do u ge the impression of jumping from woman to woman thing?

u got great chemistry,thats a good start, i wld think!!