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Full Disclosure

In an attempt to understand the male psyche, I asked a few men the question that a lot of women have pondered.  Why won’t men tell everything? I got a lot of great insight about this.  Apparently, it’s one of those “be careful what you wish for” kind of things that we think we want but probably won’t like it.

What makes some men avoid telling it all is the reactions they think they will get once the disclose what they are truly thinking.  It’s not about any fear (well not physical fear, hopefully) of women, but it is the dread of getting the cold shoulder, bad attitudes, and having the sex come to a screeching hault.

It takes a long time for some men to even trust their mate with their inner thoughts.  During that time, he is observing how the woman responds to stress, disappointment, anger, etc.  This tells him a lot about her character and maturity.  Once they get that trust, often times they are more willing to share with you what they are thinking and feeling.

Guys, when do you feel that you can give full disclosure to the women you are dating? How can a woman show that she is trustworthy?  Why are some men drawn to the type of woman they can’t trust fully and stay in a relationship with her?

Ladies, have you ever dated someone who told you everything? I am talking full disclosure and honesty about who he was, his intentions, etc. Was it a great experience? Did you find that you had to adjust to that type of honesty all the time?

When you are exploring a relationship, do you want to know everything about the person you are dating?

238 comments Add your comment

MELO

November 11th, 2009
3:51 pm

abc…u didnt address the issue tho.

U so knowledgeable on the bible..wld u mind teaching me stuff,say on ur off days,about that book?.

Im horrible with the bible…horrrrrrible.

I was even ashamed to ask u more about King Solomon

Leggs

November 11th, 2009
3:53 pm

King Big Dummy! Sounding just like Fred Sandford!

Raqi

November 11th, 2009
3:54 pm

Tonight it’s shrimp and monterey jack cheese grits with grilled focaccia and jalapenos.

Hot! Hot! Hot!

Mo (aka Moeisha)

November 11th, 2009
3:55 pm

Leggs – LOL! I guess I did huh? :smile:

But seriously, I need him to go sat down too! GEESH!

Raqi

November 11th, 2009
3:55 pm

Mo, I can’t stand those Comcast commercials.

Tazzee - Give Us Free!

November 11th, 2009
3:55 pm

My BFF and I wanted to sign up for Trading Places, but I love ceiling fans and they NEVER let homeowners keep them. I saw that episode with the moss on the walls – I would have fought someone over that – it looked like all kinds of bugs could get caught up in there.

I need some good crock pot recipes, it’s that time of year…

Tazzee - Give Us Free!

November 11th, 2009
3:56 pm

I like Shaq.

Dream_n (One action can change the course of your life forever..Be wise think first

November 11th, 2009
3:56 pm

Does anyone else have a friend that you have to repeatedly build up their self esteem and they look to you for confirmation on almost everything… it gets draining

Willie Dynamite

November 11th, 2009
3:57 pm

Raqi – How are U cooking the Shrimp? Is it like Shrimp n Grits (gravy style) or like fried fish n grits? Either way i’ll drop by round 7:30.

MELO

November 11th, 2009
4:00 pm

Grits???

Raqi, i thoght u guys eat grits for breakfast…. hmmmm

Smetime back,Queen and I went to Gladys Knight place at stonecrest for dinner and all we found on the menu was grits that,grits this all over the menu…………..

we looked at the menu,glanced at each other and we were outa there…neva been again.

Southerners have funny tastes smetimes.

Raqi

November 11th, 2009
4:01 pm

Tazzee I usually reserve my crockpot for stews or beans.

Beef, chicken, lamb are the usual. I’ll email you some of my recipes.

Raqi

November 11th, 2009
4:02 pm

Yes Willie I cook my own shrimp. And no you can’t have any. LOL

Mo (aka Moeisha)

November 11th, 2009
4:02 pm

Tazzee – I like Shaq’s skills on the court….in his hey-day.

However the fact that he cant talk above a mumble irks me to no end. Dude you make waaaaay to much money to sound like a 1 yr old learning to talk! Take the marbles oucha mouf and speak clearly!!! :mad:

Mo (aka Moeisha)

November 11th, 2009
4:03 pm

Not to mention Shaq cant stay out of the media for cheating

Mo (aka Moeisha)

November 11th, 2009
4:03 pm

meant cheating on his wife

Leggs

November 11th, 2009
4:04 pm

@Dream_n, yes I have one. I spoke about her in my first post this morning (not on what you’re now asking about). She never understands why I’m basically always upbeat and not walking around gloomy and doomed like she does. She’s draining and can only take her in small dosages. Your attitude determines your outlook on life not life’s outlook determining your attitude!

abc

November 11th, 2009
4:07 pm

I’m not that much of a theologian, Melo. I recommend participation in Bible Study classes through your local church. I’ve been in one class or another pretty much continuously for the past several years. I find that pretty much whatever dilemma I might face, there’s guidance for it in the Bible.

About King Solomon, check wiki — http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_Solomon. He had 700 wives, 300 concubines! So one may conclude that he was straight up crazy!

Raqi, like I said, I’ll discuss, but not argue. Assigning blame obscures the problem at hand. Bring the nasty face and insulting comments, dredging up real or perceived wrongs from the past, where a fly would light upon you and fall over dead — in short, be an argumentative woman — and I’m not going to participate. The good part is my own great fortune in having an extraordinary woman who doesn’t need nor care to argue with me, as I’ll do all I can to please her anyway, and it’s not in her nature to be obstinate, even as stubborn and willful as she can be. The value of a truly good woman can’t be overstated. She has few complaints.

Even at that, it took her awhile to get full disclosure out of me! Trust earned with greater difficulty results in more enduring loyalty — she has my loyalty due to her trustworthiness, which she has earned.

Raqi

November 11th, 2009
4:07 pm

Yes Melo grits are good for dinner also. It’s a little heavy but it’s a good stamina builder. LOL j/k

Hey feed the family that and every one will sleep like babies. Even the baby. She’s getting her fair share of table these days.

LURKER

November 11th, 2009
4:07 pm

Shaq-diesel is going to get dieseled! Although I do think dude is funny!
I disclose that I will tie up the Professor to a chair and commence to completely satisfying her inner freak! :wink:

After you have sexed up a woman and made her have the BIG O, she will dislose bank account pin numbers, passwords and let you know if she have been in a 3-some. That is the truth! :smile:

Dream_n (One action can change the course of your life forever..Be wise think first

November 11th, 2009
4:11 pm

as I’ll do all I can to please her anyway,

abc sorry to but in.. but that above statement had me a little confused..
Anything to please her..meaning anything to make her happy?

MELO

November 11th, 2009
4:12 pm

He had 700 wives, 300 concubines! So one may conclude that he was straight up crazy

Damn,he was the man! No wonder he wrote that way u abc

But i wld rather studyKing Solomont than be meeked up, in a bible study class with some folks.

Church folks get on my nerves smetimes..well,a lot of times.

Cemeeli

November 11th, 2009
4:12 pm

@ Mo & WillieD – i like MushMouth.

Remember him from ooooohhhh, i’m going to wat Fat Albert with my baby tonight.

MELO

November 11th, 2009
4:14 pm

It’s a little heavy(grits)

well some folks at my job eat them, for breakfast.
No wonder they sleep on the job!

Raqi

November 11th, 2009
4:14 pm

abc I get what you are saying. Like I said, I may a very similar statement. However, I can’t get with being told what I have to say does not matter because you say so and all is well because you don’t feel the need to discuss.

That’s all I’m saying. Two adults with two point of views can lead to a disagreement or two.

Leggs

November 11th, 2009
4:16 pm

I eat grits almost every morning.

Tazzee - Give Us Free!

November 11th, 2009
4:16 pm

Raqi – thanks, I’ll be looking for those recipes. BTW, your song just came on the radio. I’m trying not to throw my hands up, LOL.

Mo – I think Shaq is funny. Loved his show Shaq vs. I think Doug Christie is probably the only NBA player that hasn’t cheated on his wife. And I love the way Shaunie’s not taking his crap. Oh and when he filed for divorce because she was stacking away $$$? That was priceless :lol: Now I hate that he got caught with his hand in the cookie jar again and I really hate what it’s going to do to the kids.

Raqi

November 11th, 2009
4:19 pm

Tazzee I have been putting everything these days on CD’s so I will send them to you later this evening or tomorrow.

And gone ‘head and throw ‘em up. LOL

MELO

November 11th, 2009
4:19 pm

abc,in some ways u w;ld think the bible is just brainwashing.

A tribe of old pple are wise enough to record their history,travels and culture and we are all supposed to acknowledge their teachings as fact or a good guide on current life?

The bible was relevant back in the day,for those zulu,i mean, jewish pple!

abc

November 11th, 2009
4:21 pm

Church people get on my nerves a lot, too, Melo. They are a study in the need for patience. Most of the time, they serve as good models for how to not act like a Christian. They don’t respond well to challenges to their beliefs, which they often make up all on their own! But hey, they’re just people, like people everywhere.

See now, Raqi, I didn’t intimate that what a woman would say doesn’t matter, that’s just an argumentative extrapolation, not based in what was said. I’ve said several times discussion is fine, but arguing is not. This serves as a fine example of how arguing obscures the issue.

MELO

November 11th, 2009
4:21 pm

ok..good nite folks…

careful on the drive home,its windy

Gota go get the kids,playing house wife today!

Raqi

November 11th, 2009
4:22 pm

Leggs I usually only do grits for breakfast on the weekends. Or maybe once or twice during the week. I like to cook mine slow to get them good and creamy.

When it gets cold like now I make oatmeal for the menfolk. I try to at least get a couple spoons down myself. It’s quicker to cook.

Mo (aka Moeisha)

November 11th, 2009
4:26 pm

Tazzee – lets not even talk about the Christies! LOL! WOW!

Raqi

November 11th, 2009
4:27 pm

But the thing there abc is, where I (she) may call it discussing a matter, you (he) may call it arguing because you don’t want to deal with it.

That’s the point I am trying to make. If we are disagreeing you can’t call it arguing when you no longer want to listen to what I have to say.

That is what I have gotten from your comments. It’s arguing because you say so.

But it’s all good. All you men are the same. Nothing new for me. LOL

abc

November 11th, 2009
4:34 pm

Shoot, if we can’t get together on a topic any better than that, I’d say we have no business being together, Raqi!

Leggs

November 11th, 2009
4:40 pm

@Melo, don’t get it twisted. You’re not playing housewife. Yousa being a parent!

Leggs

November 11th, 2009
4:54 pm

Good night! let’s keep it real….

“Remember where ever there is a good looking, sweet, single or married man there is some woman tired of his bulls*t!” :lol:

Leggs

November 11th, 2009
4:55 pm

Good night everyone!

“Remember where ever there is a good looking, sweet, single or married man there is some woman tired of his bullshyt!”

LURKER

November 11th, 2009
4:56 pm

@Raqi….. It’s arguing because you keep running your big mouth after your husband has stated I am dropping this conversation. Their are times you need to let it go and start over another day!

Raqi.. husband did you fixed the pool yet?
Husband… No I did not fixed the pool! ZIPPPPPPPPP!

Conversation over till the next time!