What’s Wrong with Being Friends?
I know that some of us cringe at the thought of being stuck in the “friend zone” with people we are romantically interested in. There is nothing worse then wanting more when the other person doesn’t seem interested in that. Then I wonder why we actually don’t aim to be great friends before a romance even gets started?
I think some of the best relationships in history, the long-lasting ones, are couples who were extremely close friends. The friendship that holds trust and loyalty can only improve a romantic relationship that comes later.
Guys, what is it about being friends with a woman that bothers you? Isn’t it possible that a strong friendship with a woman could enhance a romantic connection with her?
Ladies, do you find it difficult to begin a relationship with men who are your friends?
When you think about the people that you have dated, how do they rate on the friendship scale? Do you actually consider them people you would want to hang out with and enjoy without the potential for romance/sex?
Do you think people would want to be your friend without the possibility of love and sex? We all have the superficial things that we are attracted to but we know that is not enough to sustain a real relationship. Why don’t we put more effort and energy in being friends first?
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402 comments Add your comment
SexyCool - Cloud Status - 7.7
November 4th, 2009
3:39 pm
ForReal – You stoopit.
Professor
November 4th, 2009
3:40 pm
…stepping in for a moment.
@Dream I agree with women being competitive especially those that haven’t learned their self worth. Once a woman knows her worth she knows she is regale even with sweats on rocking a ponytail…
Oh yea, I forgot I want to send a big shout out to all of the lurkers hanging out at lurkers cafe
Cemeeli
November 4th, 2009
3:41 pm
Well, Ctha1 you read real happy and bliss boss… CONGRATULATIONS!
SexyCool - Cloud Status - 7.7
November 4th, 2009
3:42 pm
“I’m jussayin, if we throwing blame – aim.” THAT is the exact point I was trying to make.
For Real
November 4th, 2009
3:42 pm
Yup …ever seen chics @ the car show? – Dayum the car show. Chicks were competing at the Golden Corral.
Dream_n
November 4th, 2009
3:43 pm
LOL..
Cemeeli/ Professor…
I’m speaking from me and I am not going out trying to compete with another female… but if they feel the need to compete with me…. I am truly honored
Dream_n
November 4th, 2009
3:44 pm
Not the Golden Corral!!!!!
lmao… For Real you are straight krazy!
THE INFAMOUS DK
November 4th, 2009
3:44 pm
Dream – And its obvious you missed my sarcasm.. Dang!Napoleaon Dynamite
For Real
November 4th, 2009
3:45 pm
“again pure sarcasm” – Women speak for “Imma try dis here on my Chevy Rider”
Leggs
November 4th, 2009
3:48 pm
@C tha 1 ~ wished she was more honest with you and herself. One of the 2 guys I’ve known for ever and use to date didn’t invite me to his wedding and he knew I wouldn’t have come. However, at the exact moment the wedding was to take place I found myself sitting on the stairs in my house crying my eyes out. I knew I cared deeply for him and he cared for me, but he was a playa and knew he wasn’t hanging up his playa card once married. Now divorced and he wants to get w/me but as a longtime friend who talked all the time, I know too much about his dirty ways.
You old gf was doing a lot of wondering during your wedding and yes feeling empty. So much it took her appetite but she wanted to give good “face.”
For Real
November 4th, 2009
3:48 pm
“Not the Golden Corral!!!!!” – No ish, chicks had on 10″ heels, skin tight jeans, low cut shirts, prom dresses, and chuch outfits, during the breakfast hours. I’m like please fall, pleaseeeeeeee.
C tha 1
November 4th, 2009
3:48 pm
Melo, I’m sorry I don’t follow you…what do you mean?
Leggs
November 4th, 2009
3:48 pm
Leave it alone, Melo. Sorry for the wording!
M. (pronounced M dot)
November 4th, 2009
3:50 pm
@Cemeeli
@Dream
LOL they know they like to compete! You guys like to look good when you go out right? For yourself of course but also remember women LOVE attention in some capacity!
@For Real
LOL you said they were competing at the GC. I believe it.
@ Blog
I think this is the longest the blog has ever stayed on topic and dialogued and I have read this blog for 4 years! Good work peeps…
Melo
November 4th, 2009
3:52 pm
So much it took her appetite but she wanted to give good “face.”
that sentence messed up ur whole post..
Shld have read,”yes feeling empty,So much it took her appetite but she wanted to give u a good bj”
Professor
November 4th, 2009
3:52 pm
I think women do the competition thingy over trivial things like shoes, hair, outfits etc. While I have seen men do the competition thingy over trivial things such as who know the most about sports, who car has the biggest rim etc. Both sexes do the pissing contest it is just a matter of what they are pissing about.
I am always amazed when these females try to compete with me and they would not last 20 minutes in these stilettos.
Raqi
November 4th, 2009
3:52 pm
they know they like to compete! You guys like to look good when you go out right? For yourself of course but also remember women LOVE attention in some capacity!
Mdot so you look for women wearing overalls and burlap skirts?
Raqi
November 4th, 2009
3:54 pm
Both sexes do the pissing contest it is just a matter of what they are pissing about.
Yep.
Leggs
November 4th, 2009
3:54 pm
@Melo, you know what I meant by good “face.” Her innards were hurting, but she wanted to appear that all was good with her (when it wasn’t).
Melo
November 4th, 2009
3:55 pm
C tha 1
u dont follow me?…did u sleep with said friend,prior to ur being got??
Mo (aka Moeisha)
November 4th, 2009
3:55 pm
M. – in regards to my BFF, no I dont sweat when he brings his new flavor of the month (or when he used to) around. If anything Im checkin to make sure she isnt foul. But I know that I dont want him romantically so it doesnt matter. Now as for other males friends, if we are truly friends, then no. The way I see it is you arent my type so there is no reason for me to look at your new boo in such a way as to question if Im missing anything. There is a reason you are in the friend zone and you having a chick doesnt change that.
Raqi
November 4th, 2009
3:56 pm
Leggs I think we all have had to wear the good face at some time or the other.
Dream_n
November 4th, 2009
3:57 pm
am always amazed when these females try to compete with me and they would not last 20 minutes in these stilettos.
High 5 Professor… Me in some high heels is a killa!!!
M.
You guys like to look good when you go out right
Tis is true, but competing.. Absolutely not!!
Professor
November 4th, 2009
3:57 pm
Leggs…you know Melo saw good face and thought of something naughty…he enjoys talking nasty
M. (pronounced M dot)
November 4th, 2009
3:58 pm
@Raqi
LOL thats funny…You make it like you dont ever have to or like to compete in some capacity…I just acknowledged that we have female attention freaks that are alive and well… They are among us and they like to be seen. It’s like the BIG O to them to get attention and you know it.
Professor
November 4th, 2009
3:59 pm
There is a reason you are in the friend zone and you having a chick doesnt change that.
Mo you can say that again!!!!
For Real
November 4th, 2009
3:59 pm
C1: Baby I can’t wait to do that thang you promised we would do when we got married!
C1 Wife: Yeah baby I am sooooo happy we are finally married but ummm your friend over there look kinda down.
C1: Yeah so we go do that when we get to the room right?
Wife: Go check on your friend!
C1: Okay but let me rub…
Wife: Go!
C1: Hey Trick that wouldn’t give me the time of day. What wrong?
TTWGMTTOD: Saw an old friend on the street
She said today’s your wedding
My heart stopped
The tears dropped
Saw my whole life pass me by
I had to see you, baby
I never ran so fast before
I rushed inside the chapel door
You were waitin’ all alone
You turned around and heard me call
Congratulations
I thought it would have been me
Standin’ here with you
Congratulations
I hope you’re happy
’cause as long as i can breathe
You’ll always be the one for me, oh, oh
Lord Velonese
November 4th, 2009
3:59 pm
Three words Daily – Your not special
Cemeeli
November 4th, 2009
4:00 pm
@ Dream_n – I’m old…(well i’m 10 your senior…so that’s old)…Girl going out, competing ain’t never been my cup…You know life will definitley change for you too in these next 10 years young lady…the baby grows up…4am is the time you get up and not the time you go to bed anymore…club attire is now replaced with Tahari and Burb suits…grow a couple greys…you become a PTA rep, team mom,…girfriend/boyfriend is what you hear young folk say…bedtime is after supper…then BAM even though you can still rock the fiyah jeans you only wanna do it for…
lol…girl i am tired and waiting on 4 oclock…i gotta give an update at the PTA meeting for real…and i’m just draggin’… don’t mine me and the ‘ole lady’ spill…
THE INFAMOUS DK
November 4th, 2009
4:01 pm
Ya’ll babes are brutal.. “Look at her, girl she know she dont need that on. Her purse dont match her shoes, her butt too big, she got a booty do, her lipstick is ugly, her weave tracks are showing, her tittays are lopsided, etc.”.. Dudes dont do that.. We could care less what another dude has on unless he is just 100% wrong. Then we aint gonna say anything we just might hit our Boy and laugh like “Do you see this clown” and thats the end of it.
Leggs
November 4th, 2009
4:01 pm
Me and a friend just had a convo yesterday about how she buys her clothes from expensive places so no one would have the same thing on as she in the circle she runs with keeping competition down to a minimum. WHAT, REALLY! Told her she’s concerned about the wrong thing. If I walked in somewhere and a woman had on the same thing I had on, I would walk up to her, compliment her and if she’s wearing it better than I am tell her so. If not, I’ll keep that tidbit.
Professor
November 4th, 2009
4:02 pm
Lord Velonese
3 words (just for you)- Jesus loves You
SexyCool - Cloud Status - 7.7
November 4th, 2009
4:03 pm
Yeah, what Cemeeli – except for all the kid-related stuff.
I don’t know why guys can’t get it in their heads that I go out looking good cause I like to look good to mydamnself and my dude.
Cemeeli
November 4th, 2009
4:03 pm
@ Leggs – okay…i’m not special either…well thanks for burstin my ballon of happy.
SexyCool - Cloud Status - 7.7
November 4th, 2009
4:04 pm
Three More Words – You can’t spell.
Leggs
November 4th, 2009
4:04 pm
@Raqi, yes we all have worn it.
@Professor, that’s why I apologized for using that wording knowing Melo would think what he thought. But giving “good face” adequately described what I wanted to say. He’s just a horny horndog that likes to shock people!
Deeva4Life
November 4th, 2009
4:04 pm
LMAO…For Real – you are bonafied krazy!!!
THE INFAMOUS DK
November 4th, 2009
4:05 pm
Lord Vel – that was funny.. I cracked up when I saw that..
Cemeeli
November 4th, 2009
4:05 pm
@ SCool – I know, right…
THE INFAMOUS DK
November 4th, 2009
4:05 pm
Sexy Cool – Now that was funny too.. Ya’ll keep it up I’m crackin up over here..
Raqi
November 4th, 2009
4:05 pm
You make it like you dont ever have to or like to compete in some capacity
Mdot I didn’t say that. However you made it seem as if it is impossible that a woman would dress nice because she likes to and/or to attract you.
There are certain things that if my husband ask me not to wear, I will not wear. Honestly. If my dressing nicely was only to compete with other women he would probably not care what I wore. And I probably would not care if he liked it or not.
Mo (aka Moeisha)
November 4th, 2009
4:06 pm
Professor – LOL! Im serious though. Obviously that person isnt really in the friend zone if you would take a second look at them based on them having a new boo.
Dream_n
November 4th, 2009
4:06 pm
Cee you are nowhere near old.. trust me… lol
and my mon is growing the grey in and it’s very complementing to her. Now I’m not saying I’ll be overjoyed when the grey comes in, but judging by the genes, I think I’ll be just fine:)
Don’t remind me about the little one getting older she’s already a handful now.
Professor… ur a fool.. lol
Leggs
November 4th, 2009
4:07 pm
That song right there, Vesta (?) is the signature song for a dear friend of mine. Word for word, that’s exactly how she felt. We all have our song!
SexyCool - Cloud Status - 7.7
November 4th, 2009
4:07 pm
“Do you see this clown” – Translation – Look at them busted ass sneakers he’s got on. Dude look like Barney in that effin’ purple suit. WTF is that raggedy mouf dude doing with that dimepiece? ” and so on.
Leggs
November 4th, 2009
4:08 pm
@Cee ~ when did I burst your bubble????
Cemeeli
November 4th, 2009
4:08 pm
SCool – I soooo agree with your 4:03…agian…i know..i know.
czBrat
November 4th, 2009
4:09 pm
Three More Words – You can’t spell.
LMAO!!!
THE INFAMOUS DK
November 4th, 2009
4:09 pm
Check out Skye – Say AMEN.. The chick from Morcheeba.
How do we start this
How do we keep it going strong
Do we know how, do we know here we belong
How do we get this
How do we stop it going wrong
Do we know why, do we know when…
Should we hold on tight, maybe
Start a fight or shall we give it up and try again
should we let it go, maybe
Put on a show or shall we fall to our knees and say Amen
Why do we want this
Why do we crave it every day
Will we know who Will we know what we have to say
Why do we feel this
Why do we need find the way
Will we know when, or even if we have to pay
Should we hold on tight, maybe
Start a fight or shall we give it up and try again
Should we let it go, maybe
Put on a show or shall we fall to our knees and say Amen
Say Amen, say Amen
Say Amen, for all your wishes
Scarlet roses from your garden, cover me
Say Amen
Cemeeli
November 4th, 2009
4:09 pm
@Leggs – …nebermind…it was Lord Velonese…sniff…him did it…it was he.