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Small Gesture, Big Return

One of the things I dislike about being single and unattached is the lack of romance.  Guys can be very light on the romance in the beginning! Especially when they are trying to figure out if you aren’t a gold digger, floozie, or some awful puppy-kicking person.

When the romantic gestures finally arrive, in whatever shape, form, or fashion, I’m ready for it.  I don’t think romance is always like the romance novels or movie love kind of romance.  I have always found that the little things you do or say can offer the biggest romantic returns.

My most romantic moments would probably not even measure high on anyone’s Romantic Richter scale.  To me, however, I really felt something and was moved, and in some instances, shaken!

I always find it really interesting how differently men and women can view romance, though. So, let’s try a little experiment:

List at least five romantic things you want to do for the person you are dating now. If you aren’t seeing anyone, imagine what you would do if you met someone you felt really connected to.

Then list five romantic gestures that you would want done for you.

Ladies, let the men know what their romantic gesture would measure on the Romance Richter scale.

Guys, let us know the same. Do you think women have a hard time romancing you? Could it be that we just don’t know what romance is your book? Do you even need romance when you are dating?

Do you think that your romantic gestures would be well-received? Will the person be able to tell that it was a romantic gesture? Does it count if they don’t?

I am curious to see if we sometimes miss the small gestures of romance because we view romance so differently!

Happy Wednesday!

276 comments Add your comment

Dream_n

October 28th, 2009
4:15 pm

My dad and Mom were watching RHOA…. and there was this episode where they were somewhere and Kandi and AJ were talking to Kim… while they were talking they were eating… All of a sudden my Dad was like “That’s what I’m talking about” I mean he was really fired up.. my mom and I were like” What?… He was like now why did she have to eat off his plate… She has her own plate in front of her…..

What is the big deal about that.. is it so bad if I want to taste YOUR chicken lol

Professor

October 28th, 2009
4:22 pm

@Dream I have seen some guys that do not want to share their food…I used to think did they go hungry or something what is the big deal. I guess they see it as you had the menu you should have ordered it

Leggs

October 28th, 2009
4:24 pm

@Dream_n, I saw that and I said to myself, “she just reached over and took something off his plate.” A lot of people don’t like that. However, perhaps they have that understanding that’s it’s ok for her to do that.

Raqi...Present Temp 100.4

October 28th, 2009
4:25 pm

Dream, that is one on those “we need to have an understanding” type of situations. Not everybody is cool with even their mate eating off their plate. Know your mate.

Raqi...Present Temp 100.4

October 28th, 2009
4:29 pm

Yeah what Leggs said. LOL

My husband is a big meat eater and we had that situation in the beginning when it would come to catered events because the servings of protein would be so small. Now it’s not a big deal since we agree. I usually take a piece and then sweep the rest onto his plate before he even ask for it. I don’t mind him eating from plate, just ask me first.

I try to remind him to eat a sandwich or something before we leave the house when I know the event is catered.

czBrat

October 28th, 2009
4:31 pm

s/o & i share off our plates cuz we’re both foodies. like to try different things. it’s a huge relief from my last bf … he was very food aggressive. and once i offered him a taste of what i was having, he said i was being “pushy”. WTH????

SexyCool - Mint Condition Countdown - 3days...

October 28th, 2009
4:34 pm

Actress Essence Atkins met her husband on Match.com – Stay positive my online dating friends.

Dream_n

October 28th, 2009
4:35 pm

Honestly I don’t think it’s that serious… If I’ve been dating you for a while/ or if you’re my husband… and you have a problem with me putting food from your plate in my mouth… but you want me to do what.and put what where???

Yeah right after I taste that piece of meat on your plate…

GTFOH!!!

Atlanta Gentleman

October 28th, 2009
4:36 pm

Leggs – mute buttons are necessary when on a conf. call while reading this blog!

I am definitely finding that out.

Raqi, Make the right woman happy, she’ll make you happy without fail.

That is one of the truest and most endearing things that I learned, too late, after my first marriage and is something that will always be my reference point for whenever I get back ‘out on the scene’.

SexyCool – I ask this question: Is it that the guys only care about romance because we do?

I guess that because I am older and a little bit wiser, I am not looking for a ways to a mean in that respect. I enjoy romance because it resonates with something in my soul, sharing that connection with someone else while on this journey we find ourselves on.

Love is a friendship set to music.
~ Joseph Campbell ~

Pardon the quotes but I read a fair amount and study Philosophy to an extent but I do also enjoy a good Marx Brothers movie from time to time and smiling is always good for the soul!

Leggs

October 28th, 2009
4:36 pm

“…he said i was being “pushy”. WTH????” That right there is funny, and a control freak in the making (his part).

SexyCool - Mint Condition Countdown - 3days...

October 28th, 2009
4:36 pm

Yeah. I don’t mind the eating off my plate. At all.

czBrat

October 28th, 2009
4:37 pm

Actress Essence Atkins met her husband on Match.com

hmmmmm. ooookay. so she either posted without a pic to find her true prince, or she truthfully posted who she was and had THOUSANDS of responses to choose from.

Tazzee - Patience is a Virtue

October 28th, 2009
4:38 pm

I’ve said many times before, a man that has a problem with me eating off his plate couldn’t be MY man.

Melo – after I said yes, he called more people than I did to recount the story. Well, his story was just that I said yes because all his folks knew he was going to do it beforehand. He had it on his FB page long before I did (some folks I wanted to tell in person first). I don’t know if it’s all because he just wants to make me happy or he actually likes it but he did consult my BFFs before the proposal. Whatever the reason, I love his romantic gestures.

Atlanta Gentleman

October 28th, 2009
4:39 pm

I do have a question that is off topic but how do you manipulate the fonts here and where does one find the smileys? I don’t see anything here in the browser window to click on unless you are doing HTML code for the italic and bold fonts.

SexyCool - Mint Condition Countdown - 3days...

October 28th, 2009
4:39 pm

AG – “I enjoy romance because it resonates with something in my soul, sharing that connection with someone else while on this journey we find ourselves on.”

I’m finding that MND is this way and learning things like that about him fill me to overflowing.

SexyCool - Mint Condition Countdown - 3days...

October 28th, 2009
4:42 pm

Leggs

October 28th, 2009
4:43 pm

Dream_n

October 28th, 2009
4:47 pm

Tazzee

I was hoping you would respond to Melo…

All hope for love/romance in guys is not lost… I’m so tired of hearing that!

Melo

October 28th, 2009
4:53 pm

Yeah right after I taste that piece of meat on your plate…

u can have my meat and any other meat baby!

good nite pple

Leggs

October 28th, 2009
4:56 pm

Good nite everyone – remember this:

Someone once said, “Aging puts wrinkles on the body. Quitting puts wrinkles on the soul.”

Never give up on looking for love and never give up being able to love back!

Smile, you’re on Candid Camera!!!

Tazzee - Patience is a Virtue

October 28th, 2009
4:56 pm

I think my fiance’ does it for the same reason Atlanta Gentleman stated. I say that because he just does the little things out of nowhere and he’s not looking for anything in response. He takes care with it too. Like for my birthday – when I got home that night there were balloons EVERYWHERE. He didn’t spend a lot of money, the thoughtfulness of the gifts were right on point. It showed that he paid close attention to me and my habits.

Atlanta Gentleman

October 28th, 2009
4:56 pm

Leggsthis will help

Thanks, good ole HTML. :smile:

Atlanta Gentleman

October 28th, 2009
4:59 pm

I hope everyone has a good evening. Time for some more ‘extra curricular’ activity tomorrow.

I enjoyed being here.

czBrat

October 28th, 2009
5:01 pm

Atlanta Gent still there?

Dream_n

October 28th, 2009
5:04 pm

Tazzee

I never got to hear the story of the proposal… When you get time tell it again soon!!!!…. I’m a sucker for a love story!

Night All…

Leggs

October 28th, 2009
5:05 pm

@AtlGent, guess you haven’t been here for HumpDay Wednesdays and Freaky Fridays!