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Keep it Between Us

A reader emailed because she wants help getting out of the doghouse with her boyfriend. This past weekend, he heard her on the phone discussing their relationship with a close friend. He was particularly upset because she was  talking about their bedroom activities as well.

His point was that you don’t give explicit details about what we do in private. He doesn’t understand her need to talk about it, especially if there are no problems.  Now he doesn’t think she is trustworthy and he thinks she’s immature.  She is in her early 20s, so it’s probably a hard lesson to learn but at least she learned her lesson.

Would it bother you if someone you were dating constantly talked about your relationship with other people? How would you handle it?

Guys, have you ever dated someone who would discuss your sex life with other people? Did it bother you? If so, why?

Ladies, do you think that it’s good practice to talk about your man’s skills to other women? Why do so many women do that? Would it bother you if your man or husband shared details about your sex life with his friends?

371 comments Add your comment

Leggs

October 15th, 2009
3:21 pm

I think I just heard they’re about to put a Black Hawk helicopter in the air to get the balloon down.

Wings -() (Human and Divine)

October 15th, 2009
3:21 pm

@Cem – Just took a gander………that machine is beautiful!

http://consumerguideauto.howstuffworks.com/2010-maserati-spyder.htm

i'm swiss

October 15th, 2009
3:23 pm

“Oh Swiss so some men DO ask all about it? hmmm…was it motor mouf?”

:lol: @ Cee — There’s a difference between asking & telling — and I don’t tell a thing. :lol: Besides, in this case there are mitigating circumstances — Mrs. Swiss is FINE AS HEYAL…. ;-) :-D

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 15th, 2009
3:23 pm

Angie – Awww youre so cute.. You slept on it and came up with that.. Thats so sweet..

Now Boo Boo its time to go to school..

B Angie B – Its is your fault if you dont give your dude some Arse.. Cause you playing the holding out game guess what he was playing the I want some new coochie game.. See how that works.. Everybody loses..

Im gonna say this and everybody listen.. Your dude isnt cheating if everything is good at home.. Just like women always say when they cheat my homelife was messed up.. He pushed me to another man. Its the same for dudes.. If our homelife aint right women begin to look attractive again when they didnt for sometime.. How do I know.. I am not only a player I am the player club president.. and when I got serious with my ex another women couldnt even throw her twat at me.. I was happy and no other coochie/woman was needed..

So Ang stay in denial baby.. And I bet you keep getting the same results..

Wings -() (Human and Divine)

October 15th, 2009
3:23 pm

@Raqi – AJC has one coming up in March 2010

Tazzee - There's nothing better than love

October 15th, 2009
3:23 pm

Melo – I’m half watching it, and praying. I pray that he doesn’t crash – that they can somehow stop the aircraft.

Cemeeli

October 15th, 2009
3:24 pm

@ Wings – We buy the car magazines now…i think my kid is turning into one of those “fast car” fan guys…eventually. I saw several nice ones in the book…THEN we both seen one leaving the Dr.’s office…

yea…crazy sweet! uhn..hunh!

SexyCool - Status - Cloud4

October 15th, 2009
3:24 pm

Cemeeli

October 15th, 2009
3:26 pm

Swiss – I’m just laughing!!! hadn’t even read your reply to me yet…

just :lol: :lol: :lol: cause i’m like…”uun hun”…

k, lemme go back and read it…

Ms. Main just getting in

October 15th, 2009
3:27 pm

Alright folks…the show is over. The meeting was just to inform us that our manager’s manager’s manger will be in town Monday and so many words….folks, keep it clean…don’t start nothing won’t be nothing…make me look good (were the actual words). The two chicks were both looking the like the cat that ate the canary, sitting poised and straight expressions.

Melo

October 15th, 2009
3:29 pm

Ladies?? u know how uall like validation for who u are,what u wearing etc……

i see u in the corridors,im behind u and u ahead,looking and smelling urself,looking down and around ur bodey,checking ur shoes etc and how u all swirl around the mirror,checking ur behind,ur shoes and pants etc….

NOW!

Can u tell, U are a good lay????????? :lol:

or it comes from sexual, laying-under-somebody, experience??

when u in the act and u hollering:
are u trying to plant seeds in his mind and confuse him smewhat or u truly enjoying and hoping he is too??

I know u care how he rates u act,RIGHT??? :lol: :lol:

Melo

October 15th, 2009
3:31 pm

Mo (aka Moeisha)

October 15th, 2009
3:32 pm

SCool – well DAYUM! that is crazy

Wings -() (Human and Divine)

October 15th, 2009
3:32 pm

Can u tell, U are a good lay????????? :lol:

Melo, Melo, Melo

Raqi...The Luckiest Woman Alive

October 15th, 2009
3:32 pm

There is no thing as no-strings relationships.

Cemeeli

October 15th, 2009
3:33 pm

Well dern, Swiss – you ain’t share nothinig with ya homeboy? Mrs. Swiss must be Thelma fine!

lol…fault my brother for that ^^^ Thelma line…he got him one…let him tell it!

Wings -() (Human and Divine)

October 15th, 2009
3:33 pm

SCool – well DAYUM! that is crazy

………And she didn’t just get crazy……….

SexyCool - Status - Cloud4

October 15th, 2009
3:33 pm

Melo – How he RATES my ACT?

Quit with the lameness.

Willie Dynamite

October 15th, 2009
3:34 pm

Tazzee - There's nothing better than love

October 15th, 2009
3:36 pm

The balloon is down – is he in there?

Wings -() (Human and Divine)

October 15th, 2009
3:36 pm

There is no thing as no-strings relationships.

@Raqi – Somebody wrote on here yesterday that there are a lot of unhealthy people out here…..no words were more true……..some folks got stuff from childhood……..today, you gotta have discernment and if you don’t have you need to be praying for it.

Tazzee - There's nothing better than love

October 15th, 2009
3:38 pm

I shouldn’t be laughing but Ryan Stewart just said the balloon looks like Jiffy popcorn bag.

Melo

October 15th, 2009
3:39 pm

Quit with the lameness.

call it lame if u want,but i truly wanna know if u care how he thinks u perfom.

I have laid with women who were clueless and their pudssy was cold.

??????????

and for the record,Queen will say,”so how was it”"

u think its becoz she secure now??

Tazzee - There's nothing better than love

October 15th, 2009
3:39 pm

Looks like he’s not in there….

Cemeeli

October 15th, 2009
3:41 pm

God help us all…

Raqi...The Luckiest Woman Alive

October 15th, 2009
3:41 pm

Wings folks out there thinking they are laying loosely with folks, no-strings attached, but there is always a string around somebody’s neck, or attached to the trigger of the gun that may one day be pointed to your face.

That guy and many like him had no idea that the little extra he was getting on the side was going to cost him the life of his wife and his unborn child. Now looking back I bet his heart is bleeding because it was not worth it.

Raqi...The Luckiest Woman Alive

October 15th, 2009
3:42 pm

Jiffy popcorn bag

Tazzee it does. That’s the first thing I thought about when I saw it. We use to put that tin pan on the stove and shake it.

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 15th, 2009
3:43 pm

Angie – Its me and you huh.. “So you think you can dance?”

You got me told in your post. Oh yeah baby..

They ate two posts I dont want to keep retyping..

Professor

October 15th, 2009
3:44 pm

Melo I will say this most people want to be pleased and please their partner if they care anything at all.

Does that help you out?

Wings -() (Human and Divine)

October 15th, 2009
3:46 pm

That guy and many like him had no idea that the little extra he was getting on the side was going to cost him the life of his wife and his unborn child. Now looking back I bet his heart is bleeding because it was not worth it.

Raqi – So Sad…..The cost on indiscretion

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 15th, 2009
3:47 pm

Angie – and dont play cause I will be in LA or SF this weekend.. I havent decided but dont talk too much trash cause I will make it LA..

Tazzee - There's nothing better than love

October 15th, 2009
3:47 pm

Re: SCool’s link – that dude started the affair shortly after he found out his fiancee was pregnant. That makes me sick to my stomach. Sorry Sucka!!!

Melo

October 15th, 2009
3:47 pm

Proff…so wld u say,after some encounters,u know where u are at on the reecter scale,sexually?

Raqi...The Luckiest Woman Alive

October 15th, 2009
3:49 pm

Melo only when you are selfish you don’t care.

Wise Diva

October 15th, 2009
3:51 pm

it’s been a crazy day, goodness

SexyCool - Status - Cloud4

October 15th, 2009
3:51 pm

Melo – I call the phrasing of your your question lame because it is.

My concern is that he is sexually satisfied as am I. And IF he is sexually satisfied, AWESOME. If he has reached the level of satiety, then no question of the quality of my performance is necessary.

Wings -() (Human and Divine)

October 15th, 2009
3:51 pm

Raqi – My sister does a workshop for single women on soul ties………….when a woman gives her body she has given her soul……..a good man who understands this will say thanks, but no thanks.

Raqi...The Luckiest Woman Alive

October 15th, 2009
3:52 pm

Tazzee I am trying to figure in my mind why would he start cheating after that. Pregnancy does not prevent sex unless for medical reasons, which is rare. “Soon after” she wasn’t even at the big and uncomfortable stage yet. Unless she was threatening a miscarriage, but those conditions usually soon pass.

Professor

October 15th, 2009
3:52 pm

Proff…so wld u say,after some encounters,u know where u are at on the reecter scale,sexually?

@Melo do you know where YOU stand on the “reecter scale?” Does Queen tell u are u just know…or do you assume

Professor

October 15th, 2009
3:54 pm

That dude may have just been a pure dog…the reason I say that is because I am thinking about the link I believe Leggs posted on here a few days ago about the man who went to jail for touching the nurse while HIS child was being born. How are you going to be standing around feeling on the nurse while your whoever is giving birth to your child?

Wings -() (Human and Divine)

October 15th, 2009
3:55 pm

Tazzee I am trying to figure in my mind why would he start cheating after that. Pregnancy does not prevent sex unless for medical reasons, which is rare. “Soon after” she wasn’t even at the big and uncomfortable stage yet. Unless she was threatening a miscarriage, but those conditions usually soon pass.

Some men don’t want to have sex with a pregnant woman….but that is still no excuse!

Melo

October 15th, 2009
3:55 pm

I call the phrasing of your your question lame because it is.

in other wrds, u neva think sexual disssatisfaction can neva be attributed to u personally.
Maybe thats ur personal situation but i know, not all women are that sexually talented. :lol: thats why i had to ask that way.

Melo

October 15th, 2009
3:57 pm

Proff,she tells me..

we open about it..

i cant say the same when i was just dating! Then,it was just me……

thats why my “lame” qstion is relevant. :lol:

Cemeeli

October 15th, 2009
3:59 pm

This is a gumbo night…

Wings -() (Human and Divine)

October 15th, 2009
3:59 pm

That dude may have just been a pure dog…

@ Sexy C – Women better know who you are marring and laying down to have kids with……….discernment……….and when it’s revealed to you ……don’t go past what you know.

Raqi...The Luckiest Woman Alive

October 15th, 2009
4:00 pm

Wings it’s not like having sex can hurt the baby unless you swinging from the ceiling and doing flips off the bed posts.

Pregnancy sex is some of the best. But I guess a guy that is not willing to go there with his wife will never know. I have heard a number of men say their pregnant wife was hot.

SexyCool - Status - Cloud4

October 15th, 2009
4:04 pm

Wings – Someone that I had a brief fling with right after I broke up with coach texted me yesterday and told me that something that I had said to him during that time nearly a year ago came true. That it was almost like a prophecy.

I called him to ask what he was talking about. He says that it was when I said to him that females have a more difficult time maintaining strictly sexual relationships over a LONG period of time without catching feelings and wanting more.

He also revealed that me saying that is one of the reasons that we never went past the fling for as much as he was feeling me because I was honest about it and that he was not ready for anything more than just the physical.

I told him that I appreciated him for doing that (albeit was without that explanation) because I would rather have the friendship that he and I have now as opposed to the broken relationship he now has with someone who signed on for Just The Sex.

Leggs

October 15th, 2009
4:05 pm

Do you think he fell out? Was he ever in there? How the heck did he get in there? Why would his parents think he was in there in the first place? How did the little boy get it off the ground? This is crazy!!

SexyCool - Status - Cloud4

October 15th, 2009
4:05 pm

I called him Coach and not Shthead and didn’t even notice. Wow. ~laughing~

Professor

October 15th, 2009
4:06 pm

@Melo I gotcha…