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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Location, Location, Location

I don’t know how to explain it but I call it the Panera Hottie Phenomenon. In the last couple of weeks, whenever I go in to a Panera Bread restaurant, I always spot a great looking guy. Not only is he great looking but he catches my eye in that “he could be my boo” kind of way.  It’s like the guy is literally in Panera bread waiting for me to walk in!

I firmly believe that where you reside, spend time, or hang out has a tremendous impact on who you meet and date.  If you find that these locations are not working for you, it’s time you shake things up! Go to a different part of your side of town, visit friends in their area, volunteer for a different organization.

Where do you spot the best potential dates? Where are the people who want a relationship congregating? Do you think your location is conducive to finding a date?

When I suggested this to a friend of mine, she scoffed at the idea of doing something to increase her chances of meeting someone.  She thinks that if it’s meant to be, then things will align and fall into place on it’s own.  What do you think? Is it better to leave it to chance or should we lend fate a hand?

321 comments Add your comment

Dream_n

October 12th, 2009
11:14 am

M/Proff

That’s what I believe also… I’d rather meet a guy in a pottery class (something we both enjoy).. than meet a guy in a club. Although I know alot of women/men that go to clubs to hook up/meet mates… I can’t take a guy seriously after he just got off the floor grinding with a girl (5th drink of the night in hand) talking in my ear… lol that’s just funny to me

SexyCool...At about Cloud 3 and rising

October 12th, 2009
11:14 am

LOL – What are prison muscles?

Melo

October 12th, 2009
11:16 am

I wld rather u go to clubs now than start getting excited about them at 45.

Professor

October 12th, 2009
11:17 am

@Leggs/ SexySthernBelle I am like you, but I have a GPS..lol! I think the biggest concern I have about going out by myself is safety …I think it is best to go with someone. I have a good friend that is a cop and you will be surprised at how much stuff goes on

SexyCool...At about Cloud 3 and rising

October 12th, 2009
11:18 am

Dream’n – I was in a spot recently. This dude approached me and we had a nice conversation. He gave me his number and over the next hour or so that I remained in the place, he went on to hit up his next two “victims”. Needless to say, I deleted his number.

M'

October 12th, 2009
11:18 am

@Dream_n

I clubbed to dance and I bar hop to socialize…never to meet someone of interest for a “relationship” of substance…not in 32 years of hanging…never made sense to me…not the nature of that jungle…it is what it is.

SexySthernBelle

October 12th, 2009
11:20 am

@ SexyCool I am shame to admit that I was born and raised here and I still don’t know my away around Atlanta. LOL

@ Leggs Girl you and I together is like the blind leading the blind. LOL

@ M Yes, I’m trying to get somewhere not run my gas out and go back home upset because I went no where for the night. LOL

Raqi...Feelin' like a Million Dollar Bill

October 12th, 2009
11:21 am

I give ole’ girl at HomeDepot her props. She just aimed for the wrong man. She had no idea he was with me. But it was too funny and I smirked a little when she got that “oh” look on her face. LOL

czBrat

October 12th, 2009
11:22 am

Raqi’s story is a good example of what I’m talking about. I’m not saying live under a rock and Mr. Right will find you. I’m just saying I don’t advocate seeking out locations to plant yourself in the hopes of finding The One. Just live your life … do what you do. If you’re going about the things that you enjoy you will naturally meet up with like-minded people. Much better than hanging out at ‘Bucks if you’re not a coffee drinker, just because you hope to meet someone who lives that lifestyle. What are you gonna do then? Learn to like pricey java in order to keep him?

Professor

October 12th, 2009
11:24 am

@Lurkerette those prison muscles scare me. I met a guy once when I was picking up my jackets and the owner told him that I was single when I left and he ran down to the parking lot to talk to me. Well when we spoke on the phone and met for a quick meeting he only talked about the last 6 months or so or 8 years back. So I told him it seems to be a gap somewhere (I guess that’s the HR in me) and he said I like you so let me be honest I did time for trafficking…you could have knocked me over with a feather.

Dream_n

October 12th, 2009
11:24 am

@ SC

I see it time and time agin.. It’s like a radar goes off for some of my friends when a good looking guy comes in the place are…

He comes and talks to our group.. the girls all swoon over him smiling and sipping their drinks all seductively (hey i may eye him a bit too lol).. but as soon as he’s done he’s over to the next group… and some of the girls are competing over who will end up with the number or give him theres first… I can’t help but laugh…

SexySthernBelle

October 12th, 2009
11:24 am

@ Dream_n I feel you on meeting a guy somewhere that you enjoy being and doing. I don’t do clubs too often and I don’t want to meet a guy doing the stanky leg and he wants to hit the club every weekend to learn the lastest dances.

Why can’t I meet a nice looking, employed, intelligent, financially sound guy at Publix? LOL

SexySthernBelle

October 12th, 2009
11:26 am

@ Professor Yes, safety is major concern for me going out alone!

Fred G. Sanford, Jr.

October 12th, 2009
11:27 am

@Lurkerette,

“I think you got this wrong dude, I think is a matter of different approaches, some women don’t have to work hard to find a man, they just live such a full life that they are always meeting men.”

I agree, but you missed my point (or didn’t read the rest of my post).

I wasn’t talking about women who ARE meeting men. I’m talking about the ones who AREN’T – the ones who do the same thing everyday, yet are surprised that they aren’t meeting new people.

All I’m saying is if a woman or man (who wants to meet someone) only goes to work, back home, and the same Kroger to shop, it won’t hurt to mix things up.

Dream_n

October 12th, 2009
11:27 am

M’

me too… I usually have a rough week between working, school, and my energetic 3 yr old… The times I do get to go out, its to relax.. chat with the girls.. and laugh at people…

SexySthernBelle

October 12th, 2009
11:31 am

@ Fred G. Sanford, Jr. You definately made some good points. I am one of those women who stay in the same areas, but expect to run into some new guy. But I plan to make some changes and get out and mingle more. We shall see if it works for me!!

czBrat

October 12th, 2009
11:31 am

So I told him it seems to be a gap somewhere (I guess that’s the HR in me)

LMAO!!!

SexySthernBelle

October 12th, 2009
11:33 am

@ Professor <>

That’s too funny! LMAO!!

Professor

October 12th, 2009
11:34 am

@Dream “He comes and talks to our group.. the girls all swoon over him smiling ” I agree this is everywhere…shoot you can see it even on blogs…car wash…dry cleaners etc.

@SexySthernBelle there are a few places I will go to alone, but some spots I will not do…the risk is too great. At the same time, I do not like rolling with a huge crowd either usually a total of three is good no more than four each person needs common sense like we all park in the same area or valet our cars in the same spot…arrive on time so we will not have to get out by ourselves etc.

Fred G. Sanford, Jr.

October 12th, 2009
11:34 am

@Raqi,

“I give ole’ girl at HomeDepot her props. She just aimed for the wrong man.”

I agree. It might be a bit embarrassing, but no harm in trying. At least she attempted to get what she wanted.

Dream_n

October 12th, 2009
11:35 am

Prison Muscles : Why is that funny to me…

M'

October 12th, 2009
11:37 am

@Dream_n

Well, as a rule…I have always gone out by myself…been doing that since I was 17…I actually prefer it that way…I hit spots rolling dolo and have a blast…in fact, I am so accustomed to going out by myself that it is hard for me to go places with other ppl…unless they are social butterfly’s like myself and they are very comfortable working a room in social motion.

Leggs

October 12th, 2009
11:37 am

@Professor, yes my biggest concern is safety. Although I do know my way around Atlanta fairly well, I just get confused sometimes. Personally, I’d rather travel with landmarks than street signs. Whoever invented those little green street signs should be tar and feathered.

I was determined to get out so I met some gfs @ Fletcher’s for some fun then followed one of my gfs to a new club called Faces (off Moreland n 285). The music was real good. Much like a renovated Bigelow’s. When I told this to someone who worked there they took offense. I cleaned it up by saying it was 3x better than Bigelow’s but almost the same. It’s just bigger, newer and cleaner. I had a pretty good time but since I had an early fundraising event I was ready to leave and they weren’t. Leaving the club alone had me a little nervous, but did have security walk me to my car. To be honest, even that had me a little nervous.

Dream_n

October 12th, 2009
11:38 am

@ czBrat

The HD story was a good example of picking the wrong guy to try out your skillz on lol…. but as long as she was respectful when she found out he had a wife….. Embarassing, but harmless none the less…

Professor

October 12th, 2009
11:38 am

CzBrat/SSB I really thought I was missing something at first, but it was obvious everything he spoke about happened last month or 8 years ago. It was a red flag…LOL

Fred G. Sanford, Jr.

October 12th, 2009
11:38 am

@SexySthernBelle,

“You definately made some good points. I am one of those women who stay in the same areas, but expect to run into some new guy. But I plan to make some changes and get out and mingle more. We shall see if it works for me!!”

Thanks, and that’s all I’m saying.

Even as a guy I have to switch up the routine, and when I do, I’m amazed and pleased at all of the attractive and friendly women I encounter.

Cemeeli

October 12th, 2009
11:38 am

Hey!

lol @ Dream_n – You’ve seen those prison arms (muscles) right?!?! You know where the dude top half is buff, and the legs are still skinny.

Cemeeli

October 12th, 2009
11:40 am

M'

October 12th, 2009
11:41 am

Hey Cee

youse jes’ red me mind…bout ready to send you a shout out…hehehe

Dream_n

October 12th, 2009
11:42 am

Cemeeli

Quite scary if you ask me.. :)

Cemeeli

October 12th, 2009
11:43 am

M’ Sis, how have you been? Good reading you….

Melo

October 12th, 2009
11:44 am

SexySthernBelle

where do u live and work??

M'

October 12th, 2009
11:44 am

Well, the house manager position is going well…just found another opportunity on Craigslist yesterday for part time computer software support via telecommute…sent my resume, called the number listed and spoke with the guy who placed the ad…he really liked how I could apply my skills and experience to the desired/required ones listed in the job description…said out of 50 phones calls that he really liked what I had to say…and wants to talk to me by Wed after he returns to the ATL…now, that would be a good gig…no commuting to the plantation, no office work culture issues…uh-huh.

Leggs

October 12th, 2009
11:46 am

Wish you all the luck M’.

@SSB, how old are you?

Professor

October 12th, 2009
11:47 am

@Leggs I totally understand…I need to check that spot out because I have never been there.

Just thinking about this location location location topic…I realize there are certain things I really don’t do in Atlanta…I have a sense of wanderlust so I often do things in other cities.

SexySthernBelle

October 12th, 2009
11:49 am

@ Melo I live and work in Conyers area.
@ Leggs I’m 29.

Melo

October 12th, 2009
11:49 am

a total of three is good no more than four each person needs common sense

3 is a crowd.
Thats a sure way to scare guys off.
Solo is the best way to make sure u get a hello,some sit down convo and some digits.Unless the guy interested finds a tag partner.Then they kinda talk of strategy be4 they approach ur group.
Problem with u females is once u in a group of 3 or more,u voice same stuff even tho u may thinking differently.

czBrat

October 12th, 2009
11:50 am

M i feel ya on the telecommute. i’m seriously considering going back to transcription. best of luck on the gig!

czBrat

October 12th, 2009
11:53 am

off topic: anyone see “Good Hair”? a real eye-opener for me. soooooo much i didn’t know about the weave world. and chris rock was ridiculously funny, of course!

Melo

October 12th, 2009
11:53 am

SexySthernBelle

yeah girl,if u in Conyers,its hard 4 u to come to Atlanta that often..its like u restrict urself around Stne crest mall, Lithonia and stn mountain.
There are some good places in and around the mall,arabia mountain,stm mountain hiking etc and the bar scene.

SexySthernBelle

October 12th, 2009
11:57 am

@ Melo Its really hard when I live and work in the same area…I rarely get to meet new people. *sigh*

And I the guys I have run into in the Stonecrest Mall, Lithonia, and Stone Mountain area haven’t been up to par. Ugh!!

M'

October 12th, 2009
12:03 pm

<strong@SSB

One can almost forget how much sprawl makes up the ATL metro until one wants to venture out and about…and the flavor changes so much from one area to the next…each with its own mix and match…and the commuting to find a vibe of interest can be daunting or draining or just plain time consuming when where one lives, works and desires to socialize are spread across the metro quadrants….geesh, I just got tired writing about it…hehehe

Leggs

October 12th, 2009
12:04 pm

@SSB, your age says you have the energy that I like when I hang out. I can definitely see you getting lost coming from Conyers. I go to church in Conyers and that’s all I know. I heard Arizona’s was a fun spot and have talked myself into going there only to talk myself right out of it.

@Professor, the funiture is white inside with a nice dance floor. Drinks are good (didn’t eat anything). Toothless attendee in restroom, which I think was a small facility, and a gravel parking lot. I must admit, I concentrated on the bldg on the side where my car was cuz it was completely dark on one side (no lights). We got to my car, I smiled and thanked him for escorting me to my car and drove off.

czBrat

October 12th, 2009
12:05 pm

yeah, M, you kinda wore me out reading it. :)

M'

October 12th, 2009
12:07 pm

lol @ czBrat

yo…now, I need a nap from thought traveling the ATL metro…hehehe

M'

October 12th, 2009
12:12 pm

2 Cobb schools on lockdown due to shooting in the area…geesh.

SexyCool...At about Cloud 3 and rising

October 12th, 2009
12:20 pm

For me, I only mind the commute when it’s something I really don’t care to do. Otherwise, I’m used to it; so, it’s like…whatever.

M'

October 12th, 2009
12:21 pm

@SexyCool
That is because you do not commute…you just materialize…hehehe

Raqi...Feelin' like a Million Dollar Bill

October 12th, 2009
12:21 pm

Guess what yall, the area of roof over my bathroom is leaking? sigh

Melo

October 12th, 2009
12:21 pm

Atlanta falcons are really masters at beating bad teams! :lol: