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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Love, Pleasure, Duty

You guys know how fascinated I am by the research studies! CNN recently reported about a study that was conducted to find out why women have sex.  Yes, this was the actual reason for the scientific research! What are the reasons women do it? They also explored what influenced the female sex drive.

After a previous study identified the 237 reasons why women have sex, researchers polled women to see which ones were selected the most.  The responses varied from love, pleasure, and duty.  Is that really all that different from men, though?

One of the researchers, David Buss said he found it surprising how dramatically and variably sexual experience seemed to influence feelings of self-esteem. I am pretty sure Mr. Buss would have already known this if he was a woman!

What do think about the study? Do you agree that women’s motivation for sex is generally related to love and commitment?  Since women are often referred to as the more complex gender, do you think that what women want out of sex is just as complex?

Guys, does your sexual experiences impact your confidence and self-esteem?  Do you think your motivation for sex and what you get out of it differs from women?

375 comments Add your comment

Jamoca

October 9th, 2009
3:48 pm

Leggs – And it can still be taken as a joke, but I wasn’t even gon’ ack as if I did not see her point. I read exactly what she posted. Her point being, there are no guarantees in life…but one. And it ain’t good pu$$y. As important as it is (and I don’t see where she disregarded folks’ point), but com’ oaannn. The blog has many discussions of some men cheating on their wives and some women cheating on their husbands. He may have good pu$$y at home, but SOME still salivating for something greater, better…or just “different”. He could very well be getting served regularly at home, but for some the entree ain’t as good without somethin’ on the side.

It just seems to me, from reading (here)and talking to other married folks…there was more to “the one” when the man decided to make a woman his wife, besides having good pu$$Y. That’s all. Heck, I remember a regular on here stating his wife came with her “A” game. Now to me, it would definitely seem that she came with a whole lot mo than just good “P”.

Good pu$$y and the magic stick are incentives…a bonus. But a man/woman better bring a lot more than that to seal the deal…and keep it. But then, that just brings up back to how the discussion got started. Even after all that, ain’t no guarantees…but one (in life).

SexyCool

October 9th, 2009
3:49 pm

Karrine Stephens in SuperHead….
I am SuperCoochie….

now THAT is funny….

Raqi

October 9th, 2009
3:50 pm

DuShawn it must be worth something because I think it was Eddie Murphy that had in his pre-nup that if they divorced his wife got $5mil per child that she birth for him.

Now the only way those babies got up in there is he had to put them there.

Jamoca

October 9th, 2009
3:50 pm

Correction: That just brings us back…

Mo (aka Moeisha-gotta get tix to see Mint, Ledisi & Eric Benet)

October 9th, 2009
3:51 pm

TGIF Errbody!

okay sooooo we are talking about Super coochies?? Freaky Friday it is I see! Dayum….LOL

Willie Dynamite

October 9th, 2009
3:51 pm

Way the DJ at today? Can we get some music in this piece?

SexyCool – hit us up with summa that good good. Something Extra grown and sexy for the mental.

Raqi

October 9th, 2009
3:52 pm

Willie Dynamite, she can’t, she’s boarded up in the corner. Didn’t you read her say she was locked up in her house?

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 9th, 2009
3:53 pm

Kym – Whatchugondo? You gonna let me examine your mammary glands.. Happy happy joy joy!!

sexuallyrepressed

October 9th, 2009
3:53 pm

male, i never really developed a strong desire (thirst) for sex… so i don’t feel strongly about it, nor do I think about it all the time like other guys do; so i don’t go chasing after it. but i can help think that I’m missing out on life, missing out on something very important. This is why I’d asked how does one develop that thirst…

Leggs

October 9th, 2009
3:54 pm

@Jamoca, we all read what she posted. The bottom line is no one is saying that good sex will keep your man. That are a slew of other factors necessary for the equation to equal 100%. Good sex vs lack of sex. Which man you think will stay in the relationship the longest and not dip to the other side.

SexyCool

October 9th, 2009
3:58 pm

Willie…all I got today is this soundtrack playing in my head,
Yearning and longing for the next time he takes me to his bed.
Searching and wishing and fishing for that perfect high.
Counting down the minutes until the meeting at the Y.
Now on Fridays, I keep it extra sexy cause I’m fully grown.
I have told you Victoria’s secrets but that ish you should have already known.
I laid out some Pleasure Principles and for ladies a few tips,
Like don’t just lay there and make sure you wet your ‘lipps.’
It has been said that the good good will make you act just like a fool.
But they don’t call me SuperCoochie, they call me SexyCool.

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 9th, 2009
3:59 pm

Elijah – Naw dogg A woman cant be called SC she has to have verifyably excellent Super Coochie. She cant be BKA Super Coochie.. She can be labled as having Super Coochie but not Super Coochie because that would lead one to believe she is the SSC.. Supreme Super Coochie.. And that just cant be determined.. There are too many variables..

Raqi

October 9th, 2009
3:59 pm

Repressed you may never get it. Some people are asexual mentally. However for you to be asking the question there must be something there.

I really don’t know what to tell you other than hopefully you will get with the right woman the will help you release the beast within…if it’s there at all.

Melodramatizulu

October 9th, 2009
4:00 pm

sexuallyrepressed,get urself checked by the doc.
They can do a testestorone lab wrk to see the levels u have..Thats the scientific,medical way of doing it…then they figure out if ur levels are okay,low or what for ur age.

The quickest way tho wld be u to just pay for a lady to come by ur house and do a paid for perfomance..let her strip evething then let her go ahead and moon u…

u can be sitting on chair as she performs.

If there is no tension in ur pants…dude,they are looking for those types at the Vatican.
good luck

Willie Dynamite

October 9th, 2009
4:01 pm

Raqi – My bad, I thought that meant she didn’t have all the filters on today and could be extra wit it.

Repressed – Fight the urge to be different. Go out and get you a piece, heyal get ya a few pieces and report back.

czBrat

October 9th, 2009
4:01 pm

LEGGS what do you think those numbers would look like in an AJC poll?

SexyCool

October 9th, 2009
4:01 pm

Raqi – Don’t get me to talking about the beast….ooo lawd…said like JPE…

Willie Dynamite

October 9th, 2009
4:04 pm

SC – that right there will get yo azz ……

Melodramatizulu

October 9th, 2009
4:05 pm

BTW where are you talking your Queen?

she said she wants to go dance…..im go feed her first at that spot…

then ill let her drink whatever she likes…and waste herself….

SexyCool

October 9th, 2009
4:05 pm

Yeah…I know. ~chuckling~

Leggs

October 9th, 2009
4:06 pm

@czB, hard call. He’s getting bad press every time he turns around. Here in GA, it could go 60% Yes, 31% No, 9% unsure (cuz there’s a lot of punks here in GA who are afraid to stand in the light). And saying that is in no way calling Georgian’s punkish. This is now a melting pot.

Mo (aka Moeisha-gotta get tix to see Mint, Ledisi & Eric Benet)

October 9th, 2009
4:06 pm

Alright SCool! Go on and shut it down for the weekend chica!

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 9th, 2009
4:07 pm

My mind is telling me no but my body my body’s telling me yes
I (baby) don’t want to hurt nobody
But there is something that I must confess……….. (chill)

I don’t see nothing wrong with a little bump and grind
I don’t see nothing wrong with a little bump and grind

czBrat

October 9th, 2009
4:08 pm

based on the stuff i see daily in the Vent, i would have said AJC would be about 90% NO. sickening!

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 9th, 2009
4:09 pm

There’s a gentle autumn breeze
That blows whenever we be lyin’
Lyin’ in my bed
The moon appears and disappears
U look at me, my clothes I quickly
I quickly shed

The curtains dance a minuet
Autumn plays the music baby
Come on hold my hand
Leaves are fallin’ velvet splash
Only u and I can under
Only u can understand

The sunlight draws a picture
Through the silky lace that hangs above your
Hangs above your door
A picture that is waving
That is seems to be with every thrust
U make me beg for more

A robin sings a masterpiece
That lives and dies unheard
For screams of passion

DuShawn

October 9th, 2009
4:10 pm

Good sex may not keep your man, but it will make him put up with more bullshyt. Me and my ole lady done got it down at least a few thousand times. After all these years she still got that fiya. There have been times when I couldn’t stand her muffuggin azz. I’ll sit there thinking to myself, this bytch make me sick, I should leave her azz. Then she’ll walk by in a thong, I see those thighs and that azz. Then I think, damn! that girl know she could phuck and suck like a champ. Maybe she deserves another chance. I think we could work it out.

Jamoca

October 9th, 2009
4:10 pm

Good SEX is not key to keeping a man locked in. While I do belive that having sex and being creative will keeps things interesting it will not keep a man tied down to you. no matter how good it is, is not the nail in the coffin.

More hoopla. And then comes (full circle) what the woman already stated, (Leggs) with this here —> The bottom line is no one is saying that good sex will keep your man.

Soooo, between that lil bit there and the hoopla in between, what was so different from what she stated (initially) from what folks have pretty much stated in the end??? Not much difference, IMO.

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 9th, 2009
4:11 pm

Come. Closer.
Feel what U’ve been dyin’ 4
Don’t be afraid, baby
Touch it and explode
Understand, understand that I love U
But more than that – I want U
Everybody always told me
“Good things come 2 those who wait”
But I’ve got so much on the menu
I just can’t wait, I just can’t, I can’t wait baby
I can’t wait baby
I can wrap my legs around U girl
Cuz sugar, U know U’re just the kind of lover
That I’ve been looking 4
2 night why don’t we skip all the 4 play, mamma
And just get down here on the floor

Scandalous
I’m talkin’ about U and me
Marvelous – baby, baby, can’t U see
Anything U’ve ever dreamed of
I’m willing 2 be
2 night it’s gonna be scandalous
Cuz 2 night I’m gonna be your fantasy

Melodramatizulu

October 9th, 2009
4:11 pm

u did that to Bush,dont complain.

Barack is a rock star tho…and its pissing them off big tyme.

SexyCool

October 9th, 2009
4:11 pm

DK – For THAT, I would wear heels 24/7.

czBrat

October 9th, 2009
4:13 pm

ROFL @ DuShawn!!

Leggs

October 9th, 2009
4:14 pm

@Jamoca, no difference, since she repeated what I had already stated.

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 9th, 2009
4:16 pm

Turn off the lights and light a candle
Tonight I’m in a romantic mood, yeah

Let’s take a shower, shower together, yeah
I’ll wash your body and you’ll wash mine, yeah
Rub me down in some hot oils, baby, yeah
And I’ll do the same thing to you

Just turn off the lights, come to me
Girl, I wanna give you a special treat, you’re so sweet
Turn off the lights and let’s get cozy
See, you’re the only one in the world that I need

I wanna love you, love you all over, yeah
Over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again
Whisper sweet words of love in your ear
Show you I much I missed you, missed you, my dear

sexuallyrepressed

October 9th, 2009
4:18 pm

thanks guys, i just might go to the doctors, maybe even a sex therapist, which i was hoping to avoid.

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 9th, 2009
4:20 pm

There is only one for me
You have made that a possibility
We could take that step to see, ohh
If this is really gonna be
All you gotta do is say yes

All you gotta do is say yes
Don’t deny what you feel let me undress you baby
Open up your mind and just rest
I’m about to let you know you make me so
All you gotta do is say yes
Don’t deny what you feel let me undress you baby
Open up your mind and just rest
I’m about to let you know you make me so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,
You make me so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so

Dream_n

October 9th, 2009
4:20 pm

DK

lmao!!! We can tell what kind of mood you’re in.

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 9th, 2009
4:20 pm

SexuallyRepressed – Im available for free consultations..

SexyCool

October 9th, 2009
4:21 pm

DK – You know he’s a dude, right?

Leggs

October 9th, 2009
4:21 pm

Isn’t SexuallyR a dude???

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 9th, 2009
4:21 pm

Dream – Somebody said to Dj so you wanna here it here it goes.. Oh yeah and its Freaky Friday so I gotta kick this thang off right..

Jamoca

October 9th, 2009
4:22 pm

LOL @ Du.

Good sex may not keep your man, but it will make him put up with more bullshyt. …for awhile, but not forever (for some).

But then…you’ve got a little extra going on in your camp too. Your wife doesn’t mind you straying…as long as you don’t stray without her. So there probably are little to no complaints in that “area”. She allowing you to have your cake and not only eat it, but share it is probably a quality you don’t find everyday. Again, somebody for everybody out there.

Leggs

October 9th, 2009
4:23 pm

He’s in such a mood, blood flow has his vision blurred!

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 9th, 2009
4:23 pm

Sexually Repressed – If you are a dude scratch what I just said.. Yuck Man.. Yuck.. Post a pic and stop talking like a girl..

Leggs

October 9th, 2009
4:24 pm

I’m hollering….

SexyCool

October 9th, 2009
4:24 pm

ROTFLMAO!!! TIMES THREE!!!

THE INFAMOUS DK

October 9th, 2009
4:25 pm

Sexy – Its your dang fault.. That dang gone poem did it..

And how the heyal can you be sexually repressed as a dude.. Where they do that at?

Tazzee

October 9th, 2009
4:25 pm

If you are a dude scratch what I just said.. Yuck Man.. Yuck.. Post a pic and stop talking like a girl..

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Dream_n

October 9th, 2009
4:25 pm

LMAO!!! OMG!!!

THE INFAMOUS EMBARRASSED DK

October 9th, 2009
4:27 pm

Yeah dude go see a doc quick..

I feel like I just reached in some panties and found out she had a thang.. I could strangle somebody right now..

Leggs

October 9th, 2009
4:29 pm

Good night everyone!

Your attitude towards life defines not only who you are, but the quality of life you are after.

I sure hope someone winked at someone yesterday. There’s still time.

Stay safe!