Training Camp
We talked about how character traits of single parents could translate into the traits of a husband and wife on Monday. I started to think about how women are taught as children to be the nurturer. You know we get the dolls, the domestic type toys to play with and mimic our mothers. As women get older, our “natural instinct” as women is cultivated by society.
By the time we reach adulthood, we’ve basically had a lifetime of “training camp” for motherhood. I have talked to a lot of married women who say that they may not have felt prepared for marriage and family in the beginning, but it wasn’t long before they adapted. Is it because we spend our lives being groomed for the job, even when we don’t even know it?
What kind of training camp do men have for being a good mate? If a young boy is given a totally different set of toys and mimics what he sees, what has prepared him to be a father and husband? If you think about it, the traits of a “good husband” aren’t exactly heralded as positive ones for single men to have. I would even argue that men are groomed to be the exact opposite. Does that partly explain why men are aversive to marriage?
Guys, if men are taught to be hunters and providers, what or whom is teaching you about the other important traits that are needed for a relationship? Does it really come up? Do you think a lot of men “fake it till they make it” or do they work on it?
Ladies, do you think that you’ve been to a virtual “training camp” to be a good wife? Is that a good thing or a bad thing? What happens if you are missing that whole training camp background? Do you think it makes a difference on your views about love and marriage? If a guy makes a horrible boyfriend, would that make you think twice about viewing him as a viable husband candidate?
accessAtlanta Partner Sites
Sections
Advertise on accessAtlanta.com »
Reach the audience you want by advertising on accessAtlanta.com
Join the Access Atlanta Network »
Advertisers and Publishers, expand your reach by joining the Access Atlanta Network.
Tell us what you think about the site
Visitor Agreement | Privacy Statement | About our ads
© 2013 The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
464 comments Add your comment
Kym-likes the Geeks :-)
September 23rd, 2009
2:09 pm
Krispy Kreme has football shaped doughnuts..Get Out!!!
Poppa Grande
September 23rd, 2009
2:10 pm
Joseph E. Lowery was Ashby
MLK was Hunter Street
Joseph Boone Boulevard was Simpson Street
Abernathy was Gordon Street
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_former_Atlanta_street_names
Melo
September 23rd, 2009
2:10 pm
2CPTG???
can we go jus go at least one day without talking about the evil wrd??
how about luv instead??
Have u checked nandos yet in DC??
2CPTG - "If you stay ready, you ain't gotta get ready" - that includes huntin' and providn'!
September 23rd, 2009
2:10 pm
I was just curious……cause one night…..what had happen was…………
Lioness
September 23rd, 2009
2:10 pm
PG- As long as you got her a pair too
Cee- Nothing wrong with sin on Friday’s.. I LOVE those doughnuts
Raqi- I agree w/ ur 2:08
Raqi...The Good Wife?
September 23rd, 2009
2:12 pm
Cemeeli and Poppa before the baby I used to bring in Dunkin Donuts every Monday morning for those we get in around the same time I do. One of guys asked me when I was going to start bringing them again but can I do Krispies instead. Uh no. I am going to do Einstein Bagels when and if I care to make the trip.
Donuts are the devils work.
Poppa Grande
September 23rd, 2009
2:13 pm
Kym
Krispy Kreme has football shaped doughnuts..Get Out!!!
yes they do.
They’ve done for the past few years. They will make them in the team colors that you request.
School related- I surprisingly like Wills, Trust, and Estates. I like it so much that I have given it the nickname of “Stiffs and their gifts”
Lioness
September 23rd, 2009
2:14 pm
PG- I like it so much that I have given it the nickname of “Stiffs and their gifts”<– You are DEAD AZZ WRONG!!!
Kym-likes the Geeks :-)
September 23rd, 2009
2:15 pm
I think when I go to the fair I might seek out one of those Krispy Kreme Doughnut burgers..with cheese. I saw Paula Deen make one, I know this minor league team sells them, and I swore I saw a guy with one last year.
Cemeeli
September 23rd, 2009
2:15 pm
@ Lioness – ‘course not! That’s why i’ve said “moderation” for the world to read it.
Poppa Grande
September 23rd, 2009
2:15 pm
They only make the football doughnuts during football season….
Doughnuts are the work of Satan.
I had a honey wheat bagel from Einstein’s this morning after leaving the gym.
Dream_n
September 23rd, 2009
2:17 pm
We used to get Dunkin Doughnuts or McDonald’s every day for breakfast here….
I agree no good can come from eating that junk food.. (but i still do)
Cemeeli
September 23rd, 2009
2:17 pm
@ Raqi – These folks bring in Einteins, Panera, AND KK doughnuts…like we starve around here.
If you visit this spot on any given day you’d think we ran a snack shop on our floor…
Wise Diva
September 23rd, 2009
2:19 pm
see, now “Stop hating” you are in the blog penalty box! *smh* engage in a real debate, telling folks to stop talking doesn’t exactly advance dialogue, ha!
Kym-likes the Geeks :-)
September 23rd, 2009
2:19 pm
Poppa-Stiffs and gifts–I like it! I think we touch a bit on that in Family Law. Right now its all about divorce and jurisdiction. I really like Bankruptcy law..some how I find all of these depressing life event classes very enlightening.
Cemeeli
September 23rd, 2009
2:20 pm
@ 2C – what’s a “bustin”?…
Melo
September 23rd, 2009
2:20 pm
ladies can sex still be good without you “bustin” one?????
but 2CPTG
if she saying’uggh baby,right there babe,ugh, u the best,ughh,oh my god….!”", how can she turn around and then say she didnt enjoy even if she didnt get there??
I think women have this thing about neeeeeeeeding aaaaaaall the time..it doint matter how happy they are.
SexyCool.........That is all.
September 23rd, 2009
2:20 pm
Krispy Kreme is Kryptonite – ~lmao~ – they do come in a GREEN and white box.
Poppa Grande
September 23rd, 2009
2:20 pm
Lioness
I did get her a pair of gloves, too.
Also, I actually went to Macys and bought her suit for the job. I think that she was more shocked about the suit than the gloves. I got the suit instead of getting her a giftcard. I even bought some boots to go with the suit.
I got the thumbs up from her!!
Raqi...The Good Wife?
September 23rd, 2009
2:23 pm
Now 2CPTG that don’t mean it’s alright for you to jump on on top her, do yo bizness and be out MISTA.
If that’s what had happened.
Lioness
September 23rd, 2009
2:24 pm
PG- I bet she was!!! You get a thumbs up from me too
For Real
September 23rd, 2009
2:25 pm
KYM
HOT OFF THE PRESS!!!!!!
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/09258/998196-100.stm
Raqi...The Good Wife?
September 23rd, 2009
2:25 pm
Cemeeli I love Einsteins but you with my condition I have refrain from eating too many. Not to mention bread is fattening. But yeah I lovez me some Einstein.
Poppa Grande
September 23rd, 2009
2:27 pm
I will say that after shopping for women’s clothes (thanks to the ladies at Macys at Lenox for helping me because I probably looked lost in there), it seems that a lot of women’s clothing is dry clean only!! That kinda got on my nerves.
Tazzee
September 23rd, 2009
2:27 pm
Afternoon folks!
No training when I was young for me. As a matter of fact, my mother used to tell me I didn’t need to learn how to cook and clean because I would probably have a maid. My grandmother didn’t press me on cleaning as much because my grades were so good. When I got older and started thinking that I would be a wife and mother one day, I would hang around and/or watch wives and mothers. I would be my friend’s assistant while cooking Thanksgiving dinner – stuff like that. Most of this happened in my late 20s and early 30s and one day I just gave up and realized that I would never be June Cleaver.
Lioness
September 23rd, 2009
2:28 pm
Raqi- What do you love from that place?
Cemeeli
September 23rd, 2009
2:28 pm
Good asiago and grain bagel with veggie cream cheese Raqi for 1/2 is very filling. Lot of bread like you said.
Cemeeli
September 23rd, 2009
2:29 pm
@ Lioness – You hungry?
Lioness
September 23rd, 2009
2:29 pm
Taz- Can you cook?
Lioness
September 23rd, 2009
2:30 pm
Cee- No chica.. Just had some curry goat & chocolate chip cookies w/ milk
2CPTG - "If you stay ready, you ain't gotta get ready" - that includes huntin' and providn'!
September 23rd, 2009
2:30 pm
Cee, what color bus YOU rode this mornin’?
Nah, Raqi didn’t happen quite like that…….then again, she may have, that ‘yak had ya boy feelin quite lovely….
Dream_n
September 23rd, 2009
2:30 pm
Is everyone over 30 on the blog?
Poppa Grande
September 23rd, 2009
2:31 pm
I took some fresh rosemary, basil, and thyme from my garden to the office and left it out for the co-workers. It was gone with a quickness.
My mom came the house last weekend for some of my green tomatoes. She was gonna make some fried green tomatoes for some friends that were coming by her house.
I feel like I should start selling some of that stuff.
I used some basil last night in a scallop bowtie pasta dish for dinner.
2CPTG - "If you stay ready, you ain't gotta get ready" - that includes huntin' and providn'!
September 23rd, 2009
2:33 pm
wait a minute Tazz…….see, yeah, I still got a bone to pick with you!!!! You cain’t cook and you talkin bout……..gal holla at me ASAP….
Cemeeli
September 23rd, 2009
2:33 pm
….wooooow, did 2C jus call me “spesha”?
thought i asked a valid question…
Lioness
September 23rd, 2009
2:34 pm
Dream- Safe to ASSUME so.. I am..
For Real
September 23rd, 2009
2:34 pm
curry goat & chocolate chip cookies w/ milk = poot, squirt, squirt, poot, fart, Splash!!!
2CPTG - "If you stay ready, you ain't gotta get ready" - that includes huntin' and providn'!
September 23rd, 2009
2:35 pm
Cee…ask yo “old man”!
Raqi...The Good Wife?
September 23rd, 2009
2:35 pm
Lion I usually get a plain bagel with strawberry cc or cinnamon raisin by itself.
Lioness
September 23rd, 2009
2:35 pm
For Real- Only you to think that way.. My system isn’t jack like that
Lioness
September 23rd, 2009
2:37 pm
Raqi- Oh ok.. You a bagel girl
I used to LOVE them growing up..
Poppa Grande
September 23rd, 2009
2:37 pm
For Real
curry goat & chocolate chip cookies w/ milk = poot, squirt, squirt, poot, fart, Splash!!!
I agree. She better carry 2 pairs of extra panties in her purse.
Lioness
September 23rd, 2009
2:39 pm
I didn’t eat them together you fools! I am not lactose intolerant either.. Men and their sh!tty minds.. LAWD
Raqi...The Good Wife?
September 23rd, 2009
2:39 pm
Cee bustin’ begins with an “O” and ends with a “sweet jezuz”. j/k
rGasm.
Poppa Grande
September 23rd, 2009
2:39 pm
My wife is a NYer and she loves english muffins and bagels. I still don’t care for english muffins, but I like fresh bagels (like Einsteins or Panera – but can stand the store bought Thomas Bagels).
I had a bagel and lox for breakfast.
Cemeeli
September 23rd, 2009
2:40 pm
i will ask him…tho’ i thought valid points/questions can be said/discussed in a forum…a “dating” forum no less.
Maybe luv is a better venture of dialogue, like zulu said.
Lioness
September 23rd, 2009
2:41 pm
I am NOT a breafast food person at all!! Really not into feeling full in the morning..
Cemeeli
September 23rd, 2009
2:43 pm
thanks Raqi.
Naw my old man doesn’t have to explain that…we give and take…wont always be onesided.
MsM
September 23rd, 2009
2:45 pm
what about sex…….ladies can sex still be good without you “bustin” one????? one gal said yes, but I’on know myself…..methinks that’s the prize you’re aiming for…
While a woman may not bust one all the time, intimacy and knowing that your partner is completely satisfied, satisfies you (read: sometime its mental).
Melo
September 23rd, 2009
2:46 pm
Is everyone over 30 on the blog?
YES,go ahead Dream_n and tell us what heppen wit u and ur scratcher las nite.
for ur info,after 1.oo oclock eve day,the R as in R-Kelly stuff is when u bring it!
u got the floor now!