Single Parents Rock
It’s always a different experience when you are child-free and date someone who isn’t. You have to adjust to a few things, just as you would any other relationship. I admire people with children who find the time to mingle and date. I can’t imagine juggling the demands of parenthood and squeezing in the energy and time to devote to dating!
For all the single parents, what advice would you give someone who is just starting to date as a single parent? How do you manage it? What have you found to be the most challenging part of dating?
If you are child-free, do you prefer to date other people who are too? Have you ever dated a person who had children before? What do you think is the best advice to someone who is dating someone with children?
There is something about a man who is handling his responsibilities as a father that is so attractive to me. When you see the nurturing and supportive side of a man, it’s very appealing. Men, do you ever talk about your children to the women you date?
When do you bring up the fact that you are a parent?
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409 comments Add your comment
AmazonRed™
September 21st, 2009
1:56 pm
Kym – I’m not ‘bad’ for not being a virgin, you your example makes no sense anyway.
They did teach me that sex is for marriage. But they also knew that abstinance only was unrealistic, especially since they were not virgins either upon marrying. So they taught me to save it for someone I felt was special, and I have.
So to me, you just illustrated thier good parenting.
And yes, if I wanted to tell them about how many times I’d been around the mulberry bush, I would, because I’ve lived their example.
Lioness
September 21st, 2009
1:57 pm
Cee- You live by my FAVORITE Publix!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SexyCool was wet all weekend.
September 21st, 2009
1:57 pm
I still say parenting skills or lack thereof have some bearing on the way individuals turn out. Often those who are in the public eye have to devote so much time to their ‘outside’ pursuits that something goes awry. And sometimes, it is their children.
Right now, I have a gf who is a fairly successful business owner who has an 18 year old son who is a major slacker and she can’t figure out why. She is the queen of getting things on a hookup but wonders why her son could get caught passing merchandise out of the back door of the store that he was working at. She has never made him stick to anything – always allowing him to quit or forever trying to help him find an easier way to get something done. And wonders why he doesn’t have any dreams or aspirations. (And I could go on.)
I finally had to say to her that he is exactly who YOU raised him to be. She got ticked at me. I then told her that it was best she didn’t discuss him with me. Why? Cause I ain’t got no damn kids so I’m the last person to tell you how to raise yours.
AmazonRed™
September 21st, 2009
1:58 pm
I AM GETTIN THE FEELING THE BLOG FAMILY HAS SOME BAD A$$ KIDS!!!
Raqi...Out of Order
September 21st, 2009
1:59 pm
BlowMe, yeah I was talking about kids in my comment. Not the adult that they grow up to be. If my kids living in my house have no respect for my husband and any other adult authority that’s would be on me.
He knows when he goes to school, church, soccer practice or a friend’s house he better act like it’s either Mason or myself standing there.
Blow Me
September 21st, 2009
1:59 pm
**Dream n** If what you say is really the truth…You might as well give up now…Since its the CHILD’S choice. I mean really. If you go to a jail or prison how many ppl in there do you were raised in a good home w/ both parents with morals, love, and discipline???? Lets be real ppl
Leggs
September 21st, 2009
2:00 pm
How can the point be missing if one is talking about parenting and how their children turn out? No matter if examples are extreme or on point, the point isn’t lost!
AmazonRed™
September 21st, 2009
2:01 pm
he better act like it’s either Mason or myself standing there.
That ish can really work sometimes! I remember when your boy broke his arm(?), the calling out of his stupidity was classic. But I bet he thought twice about doing that again. LOL
Lioness
September 21st, 2009
2:01 pm
Supernanny is OFF THE CHAIN!! Gets my blood pressure up early in the morning
AmazonRed™
September 21st, 2009
2:04 pm
Leggs – because implying that a parent is raising their child to be a murderer is ridiculous. But you can point to some unchecked behavior as a gateway to how signs not being recognized.
And again, the exception is getting more attention than the rule. But okay. Y’all have at it.
Blow Me
September 21st, 2009
2:04 pm
And my point is **RAQI** Do you think MIDGET MAN is going to stray far away from how you raised him???? The chances of that are slim to none!
Once its taught and breeded in him and he has fear. It’s not going no where. I was a good child because I feared my parents…especially my father. If that man had to leave his job for me or my brother…We would get beat to a pulp…I was not taking no chances with that..My dad was a beast..I know how he was when he got mad. A gorilla!! lmao!
Not only that I respected him. I did not understand or like it..But I did respect him. Certain things my parents would not stand for. I was not perfect..but I did know which line not to cross.
Cemeeli
September 21st, 2009
2:05 pm
My neighbor has a new born…i’m going to visit the stay at home mom…imma take her a treat…
Then i’m listening to some music and read! Love it!
Raqi...Out of Order
September 21st, 2009
2:07 pm
There is this one little boy that comes to the house sometimes and he talks back. Makes you wanna slap kid. But it’s his parents fault. They allow him to talk back at them. And I remind him that I am not his mother and I have sent him home more than once.
Leggs
September 21st, 2009
2:07 pm
@Lioness ~ There have been times where I had to turn away from that show. Many times lil leggs and I have watched, and she would turn to me saying things like, “Mommy you would not tolerate that” or “I would be seriously hurt if I did that”. I can only shake my head Yes. Sometimes no need for words!
Lioness
September 21st, 2009
2:07 pm
Cee- What you reading??
Kym-has angered the sky sprirts and the football gods.
September 21st, 2009
2:08 pm
AmazonRed I didn’t say you were bad for not being a virgin. You just said that your parents taught you to save yourself for someone special. So if you have passed the number one special and moved on to the number two special? Then on to the number three special. Is it their fault you have felt so many fellows were that special someone or is that your own bad judgment?
Dream_n
September 21st, 2009
2:09 pm
Okay… maybe we are talking about 2 different things (scenarios)… If you read back.. my posts are mainly about growing up and making decisions based upon what you’ve been taught in your childhood..
Ans sorry no.. not giving up… I pray that my child grows up to make the right decisions in her life that contributes to her success as a woman/mother/wife….
If she has stumbling blocks down the road then I’m not going to look back and think damn at age 5 when she said that maybe i should have disciplined her different..lol no i’m not going to do that..
Are there women/men out there who are raising their children to be the polar opposite of respectful YES….so when they grow up to be civil human beings with morals … Who takes credit then???
Raqi...Out of Order
September 21st, 2009
2:10 pm
BlowMe that’s my prayer. I hope he doesn’t. I know he will make his mistakes in life but my goal now is to give him and that knucklehead in Michigan a good foundation.
My oldest made his share of mistakes and will make more, but I think he is a pretty good kid. Very respectful and mannerable. Never been to juvenile and I hope never goes to jail.
AmazonRed™
September 21st, 2009
2:10 pm
Kym – That wasnt their point. They taught me to respect who I share myself with and I have. The numbers are small for that reason as well. They didn’t say only have ONE special person. That wasn’t the lesson. The lesson was to have respect for myself and I have.
Again, your point doesn’t make sense.
Willie Dynamite
September 21st, 2009
2:11 pm
Afternoon All,
Not much to add to the topic. I’m just enjoying the show. This is classic, Folks who cant get/keep a SO giving relationship advice. And now folks who dont have kids giving parenting advice on how lil johnny is gon turn out. Funny
Raqi...Out of Order
September 21st, 2009
2:12 pm
Now Elizabeth? You all pray FOR me.
Kym-has angered the sky sprirts and the football gods.
September 21st, 2009
2:12 pm
Your parents build the foundation. You build the house. Some parents build foundations with cracks, others build solid foundations. I know folks with cracked foundations(backgrounds) who have built mult-million dollar homes. And I know folks with iron foundations who have built outhouses. Some stuff is on you.
AmazonRed™
September 21st, 2009
2:12 pm
But it’s his parents fault. They allow him to talk back at them.
And when he starts making those mistakes as an adult…we’ll be able to look back. Yes, it’s still his choice to continue down the path, but it started at home.
Cemeeli
September 21st, 2009
2:14 pm
“Sunday Brunch Diaries” by Norma Jarrett
…started this one Friday i wanna finish tonight so i can grab the next on my list.
Lioness
September 21st, 2009
2:14 pm
Willie-
Raqi- Is she just a spicy little cutie or what??
AmazonRed™
September 21st, 2009
2:14 pm
Who is giving advice? It’s a exchange of ideas.
SexyCool was wet all weekend.
September 21st, 2009
2:18 pm
One of my gf’s just called me. Her subdivision is flooding. Water is coming up her street. She opted out of flood coverage.
Melo
September 21st, 2009
2:21 pm
She opted out of flood coverage
Yeah Sxcool,penny pinching is a muthafckker!
i wldnt choose to buy a house in a flood plain tho,regardless im offered flood insurance.
To much hastle.
Raqi...Out of Order
September 21st, 2009
2:21 pm
The basics or lack there of does start at home. And it is the parents fault when they lack.
Good morning, thank you, please, excuse me, yes ma’am, no sir, may I are all learned as a child.
Everytime I encounter another adult that will not speak back or is just damn rude, yep it’s the mothers fault.
You know WiseDiva being a good parent does not automatically make you a good mate, but a certain type of parent sure helps mold your kid for the mate he/she may or may not be.
My dad always tell me to raise my boys to be good husbands and fathers. Make ‘em work. Make responsible.
Now it does not guarantee that they will be but the chances are better given the right start.
Grace
September 21st, 2009
2:22 pm
Raqi @2:07 I’ve gone thru the same thing, I will send a child home quick if he/she’s disrespectful. When my sons friends come over if they don’t speak I check them each and everytime, not in a chastising way but in a manner that they understand. I’ve had a reoccuring problem with one of my neighor’s son since, I explained to him the proper way to enter into someone else’s home by greeting them I haven’t had that problem since. It does take a village to raise a child!
Kym-has angered the sky sprirts and the football gods.
September 21st, 2009
2:23 pm
ARed I only have your word that your number is small and that your parents would approved of the number. If you were truly following your parents advice why not follow it to the letter and wait until marriage. They set their wishes in motion. You choose to do your own thang. When it blew up it was not their fault its yours. Same goes for someone who grew up(which we all did) knowing not to steal, but then they get caught stealing. The knowledge is there the application of that knowledge..err not so much. That is not daddy’s fault, that’s on you.
AmazonRed™
September 21st, 2009
2:24 pm
If you were truly following your parents advice why not follow it to the letter and wait until marriage.
For the third time: That. wasn’t. their. advice.
AmazonRed™
September 21st, 2009
2:26 pm
Kym really, you need to pick a point that was relevant. Cuz the virgin thing is only proving mine.
Raqi...Out of Order
September 21st, 2009
2:27 pm
Well it was my parent’s suggestion and I did differently. You know why? What mother nature was saying sounded a whole lot better than what momz and the house was saying.
Willie Dynamite
September 21st, 2009
2:27 pm
I’ll give my exchange of ideas regarding parenting. There really isn’t a fail proof way of doing things. My brother and myself were raised together the exact same way. He is a certified gangsta whereas I’m a productive member of society. I dont think our mother is/was responsible for him turning out that way. He made those choices. Parenting is a thankless job. If done right then guess what you are suppossed to do it right. If done wrong then shame on you.
Some people have a notion that if you are not parenting this way or that way then you are wrong. There is no Raising Kids 101 manual. The way you were raised may not be the best way to raise your child. Times change. You cant go around beating kids the way some of us got beat. At the same time we know that a simple Time-Out is not gon work either. At any rate the things that dont change have to be the foundation. Morals and values do not change or compromise.
aggwitty
September 21st, 2009
2:28 pm
OJ AINT KILL NOBODY!
Raqi...Out of Order
September 21st, 2009
2:30 pm
Raising Kids 101 manual…
Nevermind. That would spark a whole other debate for those who believe differently.
Blow Me
September 21st, 2009
2:30 pm
Wow! Ared come on…You mean your parents told you to share that special thing without having a husband. Now that is something I have NEVER heard.
Every parent should tell their child to wait til marriage. It’s just the right thing to do.
MsM
September 21st, 2009
2:30 pm
In what order do grown (30+ yrs) fall?
Lioness
September 21st, 2009
2:31 pm
certified gangsta<– Where is Dan today?
Kym-has angered the sky sprirts and the football gods.
September 21st, 2009
2:32 pm
ARed I have moved on to incompatibility and divorce. It is obvious no matter the example in your mind you are the perfect child. You have nor never will be a disappointment to your parents. That’s your mindset and frankly like Willie D said there is not much knowledge to be gleem from someone who has no children and can only relate to being a child and not a parent. If you sit with your parents and really talk to them I am sure they see with a different set of eyes. Good day to ya!
AmazonRed™
September 21st, 2009
2:34 pm
You mean your parents told you to share that special thing without having a husband. Now that is something I have NEVER heard.
^ Extra.
They told me that sex was special, and that I shouldn’t give it to just anyone and at the end of the day to respect myself. And I have.
Again, they realized that abstinance only was not realistic. Which is why I’m not Bristol Palin. I grew up knowing what the Bible said, I also grew up knowing that I’d also fall short, from time to time so to always consider the consequences of my actions.
So far, it’s served me well.
Dream_n
September 21st, 2009
2:35 pm
certified gangsta<– Where is Dan today?
lol
Raising Kids 101 manual…
Nevermind. That would spark a whole other debate for those who believe differently.
Please don't Raqi please lol!!!!
Willie Dynamite
: nice post
Cemeeli
September 21st, 2009
2:36 pm
There is no Raising Kids 101 manual!
Youa lie! when that 9lbs 12oz was put in my arms and wanted that milk…. AND it calmed his and my world when i obliged!…i swore fo’ God i was gone stay on the grind for him if i didn’t for myself…
What up WillieD?
aggwitty
September 21st, 2009
2:36 pm
LOL @ the back and forth in here. Yall folks will take a statement and make it be something it aint.
“you want it to be one way, when its the other” – Marlo Stansfield
AmazonRed™
September 21st, 2009
2:36 pm
ARed I have moved on to incompatibility and divorce. It is obvious no matter the example in your mind you are the perfect child. You have nor never will be a disappointment to your parents. That’s your mindset
Nope Kym, you came up with that on your own. You’re example simply didn’t fit. That’s all.So until you can see what’s actually written and not what you have made up in your head, good day to you as well.
I mean, not like their is much to gleem for you either just because you decided to get knocked up. In any case, that’s not really the purpose of this board anyway.
Cemeeli
September 21st, 2009
2:37 pm
@ Willie – I’m just stirrin’…gots time to kill…don’t mind c.
Lioness
September 21st, 2009
2:37 pm
Cee- 9lbs 12oz <–
WTH??
Dream_n
September 21st, 2009
2:37 pm
I also grew up knowing that I’d also fall short, from time to time so to always consider the consequences of my actions.
So when you fall… Who takes fault???
Raqi...Out of Order
September 21st, 2009
2:37 pm
Grace yeah it takes a village. The problem today is back when we were growing up parents and adults stood together. We were not allowed to run home and tell on our teachers to our parents unless they did something clearly unkosher. But now you have parents wanting to fight the teachers because the teacher tried to discipline that badazz kid the constantly disrupts the class.
You can’t speak to a child these days even for their own safety without some parents wanting to cuss you out or shoot you.