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Seal the Deal

I know a lot of men who say that compatibility in the bedroom is extremely important to them. I have never heard them say it is what would seal the deal when it comes to marriage though.

I think some women believe that men are into the chase and they only want one thing in a dating relationship.  I’m sure that is the case with a lot of single people, men and women.  However, those of us who actually value friendship over sex, are willing to find out if the compatibility extends past the bedroom. Do you find this a challenge in dating?

Is it difficult to get each other to focus on our “emotional connection” with someone without letting the  sex cloud our judgment?

Do you think that men value sex over friendship more than women? What if a guy is looking for a committed relationship, does that make a difference?

Ladies, do you think you would marry someone just because of the great sex? Would you marry someone if it was mediocre or bad? Does love have to seal the deal for you to marry?

Men, what seals the deal for you when you feel like you’ve met Ms. Right?

356 comments Add your comment

Dan

September 16th, 2009
3:59 pm

@Melo

You are funny dude. Hilarious

Ms. Main

September 16th, 2009
3:59 pm

ThirdWheel I can’t is what it boils down to I suppose.

You’re phsically inhibited because of the weight?

Melo

September 16th, 2009
4:02 pm

Thirdwheel..and u hw old??

now gettng outa breadth when the nana is teeming with full lips and wet is some angst raiser fo sure..i dont wish that on anybody including urself.

Like Lioness said, u bound to get off the cliff pretty soon if u aint getting it the way u like….

Look lady,u aint marrried to him..i suggest u dip and get some on the side…

Thirdwheel

September 16th, 2009
4:04 pm

HA HA SexyCool!

Tazzee

September 16th, 2009
4:08 pm

Dan – thanks! Wait, are you congratulating me for getting engaged or getting ’some’ LOL.

Melo

September 16th, 2009
4:09 pm

Thirdwheel

If im not mistaken,u an old blogger on here,right.,ive seen ur name a cpple of times in the past..

How do u put up with shyytt service like that when u belong to this exclusive club??
I wld assume any chic that gets on here has the best advice,for free…otherwise WD’s service aint hitting home!

whats up with that??

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

September 16th, 2009
4:11 pm

3rd wheel – Are you really in love with this guy? How old are you guys? Life is too short, honey.

Be honest with yourself & him. Do you really think if this guy loses weight things will get better? Is he even trying to lose weight? If he’s not, he does not care about you. He would rather wallow in his misery. Don’t let him lay a guilt trip on you.

Your happiness is important. Why did you move in with him? Are you afraid you are not going to meet anyone else?

I just don’t know. This does not sound good at all. Rather depressing, actually.

Raqi...Sealed.

September 16th, 2009
4:12 pm

Danggit I am busy today and just scanning but if I am reading correctly, 3rd Wheel moved in with this guy being who and how he is but now has a problem with it?

Exactly what did you think was going to change about him?

Ms. Main

September 16th, 2009
4:14 pm

You ain’t married…..do the needful

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

September 16th, 2009
4:14 pm

wld assume any chic that gets on here has the best advice,for free…

Melo – You may have a point! At least we get folks to THINK!

You are right, I forgot about 3rd Wheel! It’s been awhile, what’s up Lady?! Girl, don’t settle for that mess. Even if you could stand to lose a pound or two, plenty nice guys love the larger ladies!

Leggs

September 16th, 2009
4:20 pm

@aggwitty ~ “Nah seriously, why you move in after three bad sex attempts? Was it for financial reasons? Did you think it would improve? Are you a closet masochist?” Thanks for asking these questions.

@3Wheel, damn it girl. If he’s heaving and hoing just by trying to put it in then he needs to enroll in a gym pronto or sign up for “Biggest Loser” That is crazy to me. Are you helping him in the weight department or are you enabling him.

Now, with all that belly, all your slurpling and sucking may find you suffocating if you’re not careful. Do some exercise, the both of you. Hell, I’m finally gaining weight and I’m exercising before it gets out of hand…START NOW 3Wheel!

I just thought it would get better since we were under the same roof… Just reading this I heard so many men in my ear yelling “WTF you think that for. Just the opposite happens.” (LOL).

Ms. Main

September 16th, 2009
4:20 pm

This thing needs repairing

Thirdwheel

September 16th, 2009
4:21 pm

I am in my late 20’s, Yes, I am a past blogger :) , The weight does get in the way and yes, I really do love him which makes it hard for me to leave him. Maybe I am afraid that I won’t meet anyone else that will make me happy but I always thought there were more to a relationship… I have been told that sex is not the most important factor in a realtionship.

Leggs

September 16th, 2009
4:22 pm

She’s in her 20’s and he’s in his 30’s. Girl, you not in love…no where near it!

AmazonRed™

September 16th, 2009
4:23 pm

Maybe I am afraid that I won’t meet anyone else that will make me happy

:???: What’s wrong with you then?

Raqi...Sealed.

September 16th, 2009
4:24 pm

Do some Sexercise that way you both benefit health wise and other.

Wise Diva

September 16th, 2009
4:25 pm

what are your issues with the blog machine, and spell it out for me so I can tell if it is user related LOL Just kidding, I can report to our webmaster if it’s legit.

aggwitty

September 16th, 2009
4:25 pm

“this thing needs repairing”

was that for the blog or was that for Third Wheels dude? in either case, its correct, seemingly. hahhahahaha

Ms. Main

September 16th, 2009
4:26 pm

Thirwheel Your 4:21…seriously? Am I reading you right? Yes, I remember you too. What does meeting someone have to do with getting out of a bad situation? Staying will definitely hinder you from moving on. Go back and read the days where folks are siging and cosigning what to do when transitioning from a relationship. What’s wrong with me time, down time, self time as an effort to pull it together? Why are you afraid? Whether you meet someone or no, you still have to be you, do you, be happy. Another person is good if a good half but another person does not you make.

Lioness

September 16th, 2009
4:27 pm

Diva- This thing post what it wants to post.. It has its favorites on here.. :evil:

agg- :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Dream_n

September 16th, 2009
4:27 pm

She’s in her 20’s and he’s in his 30’s. Girl, you not in love…no where near it!

Why is that Leggs???
Is there a certain age limit on when you can become “officially” in love?? (just curious)

Leggs

September 16th, 2009
4:27 pm

@3Wheel, think about it, you’re in your 20’s. You still a young tenderoni (do they still say things like that). Can you truly stay in a relationship like this for the next 10, 20, 30 or 40 years. You two need to honestly talk to one another. If things don’t change, think about it, the both of you are going to get bigger, then what???

Melo

September 16th, 2009
4:28 pm

I have been told that sex is not the most important factor in a realtionship.

well,there u are..huffing and puffing,so u know it aint true! :lol: :lol:

Lioness

September 16th, 2009
4:28 pm

Main- I think she is big but not as big as her dude and is not sure if anyone else is going to feel the same about her as he does..

Thirdwheel

September 16th, 2009
4:28 pm

I am trying to get him to diet but he loves to eat too much.

Ms. Main

September 16th, 2009
4:28 pm

was that for the blog or was that for Third Wheels dude? in either case, its correct, seemingly

lol…both I would venture to say

SexyCool - Joy like a river flows.

September 16th, 2009
4:29 pm

“Maybe I am afraid that I won’t meet anyone else that will make me happy.”

It doesn’t sound like dude is making you happy. So, what do you have to lose?

Dream_n

September 16th, 2009
4:30 pm

I am trying to get him to diet but he loves to eat too much.

I’m trying to take this statement seriously! (am i allowed to laugh)

On a seious note: Its nothing wrong with eating..it’s what he’s eating.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

September 16th, 2009
4:31 pm

I have been told that WOW is not the most important factor in a realtionship.

You have to watch the so-called advice some people give you. It’s pretty important, because if it were not you would not have showed up on the blog after all this time talking about this very issue. The people who told you it was not important probably are pushing you up to staying with dude because they don’t have confidence in you to think that you deserve better! Maybe things are not in order in THEIR houses!

It’s great that you love him – now start loving YOU! Have an honest discussion with him about your frustrations. Be loving and tactful, but FIRM. If both of you are not working on the weight, work on it together. Get serious! You are too young – you two should be wowing like rabbits! It’s a matter of health too.

There was an AA couple on the Biggest Loser. Dude was especially big. They both look HOT now and Essence.com has their wedding pictures!

Lioness

September 16th, 2009
4:31 pm

3rd- I am trying to get him to diet but he loves to eat too much.<– WTF?? How much do you think he weighs? 3 hunned??

Thirdwheel

September 16th, 2009
4:31 pm

Right Lioness!!

Thirdwheel

September 16th, 2009
4:32 pm

Enter your comments here

Ms. Main

September 16th, 2009
4:32 pm

Lioness Main- I think she is big but not as big as her dude and is not sure if anyone else is going to feel the same about her as he does..

I’m there with you on that. I was asking though as thought provoking. I would suggest in a nice way for us to work out together but I would take it on as a duty. If he can’t be motivated and work towards an us, the physical inclusive, I dang sure wouldn’t let it bring me down.

Melo

September 16th, 2009
4:33 pm

Thirwheel

if u really love him like u say,suggets to him that u both hit the road or gymn to get ur waights down..

cook right,no mickydee or any junk poison from those places

if he luvs u too,then he shld oblige and hopefully,u 2 can lose some pounds and in the process increase and improve it.

If he refuses,do it for urself ,alone but understand one thing,hes go be jealous and insecure coz lost weight makes u more tantalising :lol:

Then bolt :arrow: I got a third leg myself so lemme know :lol: :lol:

Ms. Main

September 16th, 2009
4:33 pm

“I wouldn’t take it on…..” is what I meant.

Leggs

September 16th, 2009
4:34 pm

@Dream_n, I say she’s not in love because she seems so sad over this important issue and asking if she should leave. No talk about changing eating habits, exercise or anything, just plain asked if she should leave. A few posts later, she says she really is in love, so I retract my statement. No, there’s no age limit when one is “officially” in love. However, simple parameters to let you know you’re in love is when you really, really want to work with someone and the issue at hand and not wonder should you leave because this isn’t working. True, 3Wheel, you don’t need to come on here telling all your business. I was just working with only having had sex 3x and your tired wondering if you should leave.

aggwitty

September 16th, 2009
4:35 pm

yo for real i think another important part to this equation has not been touched on. She said “it was bad sex for them BOTH” so the problem isnt just with him but with her also.

3rd what was his prollem with the wack sex yall having?

SexyCool - Joy like a river flows.

September 16th, 2009
4:35 pm

ThirdWheel – My suggestion – try to get him to move FIRST. Maybe you guys can go for walks after dinner or go bowling once a week or even go to putt-putt.

Perhaps if you start with being more physical, other changes would come.

Ms. Main

September 16th, 2009
4:36 pm

ThirdWheel….I lost 23 lbs 2 years ago, motivated by the person dating…I’ve kept it off and feel good about it. I wasn’t inspired at first but he nudged me a bit. Now? Shoot, I’m walking at the slightest gain. You can work together but do it for you. I pretty much have maintained about 20 lbs off but it’s about me and how I feel about myself.

Tazzee

September 16th, 2009
4:36 pm

maybe it’s me, but I always thought Thirdwheel’s dilemmas were made up for blog fodder. They just seem to be so ‘out there’ – that’s why I never comment.

Thirdwheel – your statement about finding someone else to make you happy made me want to comment this time. Like Leggs said, you’re still a tender – you’ve got plenty of time to find the one for you. In the interim, concentrate on you making you happy because if you’re depending on dude to make you happy then you’re going to be disappointed and make him miserable at the same time.

Dream_n

September 16th, 2009
4:38 pm

@ Leggs : clarification *noted* :)

I agree– If you truly love tis gu and he makes you happy in everyother aspect of your life, then you should at least attept to work on it… Try suggestings some ideas that others have told you today…and go from there. Ultimately it’s your decision to be happy or not :)

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

September 16th, 2009
4:40 pm

If he refuses,do it for urself ,alone but understand one thing,hes go be jealous and insecure coz lost weight makes u more tantalising

LOL Melo!

Melo

September 16th, 2009
4:45 pm

Kimmie,sisters are doing it for themselves, i dont understand why she has to be tied down by a dude who luvs his plate,FULL

Ms. Main

September 16th, 2009
4:48 pm

Enter your comments here

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

September 16th, 2009
4:48 pm

Melo – You right, he needs to decide – full plate or empty bed!LOL!!

Lioness

September 16th, 2009
4:49 pm

DAMN!! If Taz never comments about 3rd’s issues then it MUST be the bullish of all sh!ts!!

Lioness

September 16th, 2009
4:50 pm

Kimmie- full plate or empty bed<– I bet a a hunned that he will choose that plate over that bed!!

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

September 16th, 2009
4:51 pm

Lioness – LOL!!

Leggs

September 16th, 2009
4:54 pm

I Believe…(dedicated to 3Wheel)
That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don’t even know you. Namely, gym trainers! Work on betting eating and exercise. That belly will go down before you know it and you’re be praising the O’ goddess at the top of your lungs.

Oh my!

Melo

September 16th, 2009
4:57 pm

O’ goddess

raising ur right open palmed hand and tilting it left and right,Leggs,like u in cherch! :lol: