accessAtlanta

City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Jealous Much?

Yesterday we talked about how to draw the line on flirting and being too tempted. Today, I wanted to touch on how to handle being with someone who is extremely insecure. I’ve had a jealous boyfriend before and it’s not always an easy feat to reassure someone that you are just friendly and flirty by nature. What do you think about asking a person to change that part of their personality so that you can feel more secure about the relationship?

There is only so much jealousy a person can handle. Have you dated someone who was jealous? What were the signs that they were that way? Is there a way to spot this red flag before you are in a relationship with someone?

Have you ever struggled with jealous and insecurity personally? How did it impact your dating or your relationships? What can one do to let the jealousy and insecurity go?

746 comments Add your comment

Lioness- Envy is a BIYATCH!!!

September 9th, 2009
2:33 pm

DK- I agree!

Leggs

September 9th, 2009
2:33 pm

@Taliq, yes your honesty is refreshing, but you stupidity is blinding (sorry). What will make you realize you’re harming yourself….a incurable disease. It’s time for you to man up and learn to be with yourself. You don’t have to go after everything wearing a skirt. No only, “members only” jackets, cards, kango caps died a long time ago. You’re acting like you still have milk behind your ears!

W8©

September 9th, 2009
2:33 pm

Taliq- so you mess with the under 25 girls cuz you know older ones wont deal with you?

Ms. Main

September 9th, 2009
2:34 pm

Just say what ya like and thats that…..igg zackly Now that’s being grown.

Ms. Main

September 9th, 2009
2:35 pm

@Taliq…hopefully the story changes as you get older without too many victims along the way.

Lioness- Envy is a BIYATCH!!!

September 9th, 2009
2:35 pm

Sexy- Um, actually, Taliq, knowing that you’re making bad choices and CONTINUING to make them is not “human”, it’s just plain CRAZY.<– I AGREE!!

W8- What it reads like to me..

Professor fill in the blank___

September 9th, 2009
2:36 pm

Ok Raqi I said let it GO. I will tell you this, this grown azz woman is NOT worried I just bring things to light. You mentioned the agreement thing. Well I don’t expect for anyone to sit and agree with me, nor was that the point I was making that was your conclusion. Next I have seen folks on this blog get in an Amen corner and you would have thought we were at a Baptist revival w/ all the cheering.
Next, I will say this I come on here as a break. I have friends that I hang with so I am not worried about a dam.n clique but I will call a spade a spade. No I don’t need to professorize on anything. In fact it took me a minute to take you seriously because it was hard to imagine why a grown married woman would continue to talk about her past and three different baby daddies on a dam.n blog????? To me that some shyt you take to a therapist.
Have some tea and get your patience back….

Anyone else before I go ????

Leggs

September 9th, 2009
2:37 pm

Sorry for the really bad typing in my last post.

@Ms. Main, I have to agree with you too. It’s absolutely amazing how certain statements are just ignored, but someone else can come on and say the exact same thing, and confetti drops out the sky!

AmazonRed™ - tanned to a nice toasted almond brown

September 9th, 2009
2:37 pm

Taliq- so you mess with the under 25 girls cuz you know older ones wont deal with you?

MESSAGE!

Taliq

September 9th, 2009
2:38 pm

W8,

“better be careful cuz some of these women are up on that game and will use and abuse you.”

i think it’s more like we all using each other … like honestly i’ve done so much crap it’d be beyond hypocritical to judge the next man … so yeah I’m calling em HOs but dawgy i do worse …

i dont want to say i’m addicted to sex cuz i think it’s just a side effect of some deeper issue … my money’s on the never got over the “ex i wanted 2 marry” and thus not willing/able to engage in habbits that’d lead to the next serious relationship … i’m content chasing these HOs but keep mistaking them for wifey material once i’ve been kicking with them on the regular for a minute … then get mad upset when some HO incident pops off and i see myself in a light i dnt like … e.g. she came over at 1am last night, she must gone 2 knock boots with someone else first, i mean we aint serious but y sho up at my crib if u had some oda dude 2 c … oh the HO hurt me … I feel so hurt, how could she do that … i wouldn’t have done that, i do my cheating with class/respect … blah blah blah

I continue to amaze myself at how much i play the victim despite all d crap i do

Ms. Main

September 9th, 2009
2:38 pm

@Leggs – but someone else can come on and say the exact same thing, and confetti drops out the sky!

LOL

Lioness- Envy is a BIYATCH!!!

September 9th, 2009
2:39 pm

Taliq-Didn’t you leave her??

Raqi...Not if he's my man...

September 9th, 2009
2:40 pm

But Ms.Main and Leggs although that has proven true, so what.

Wait for me to get upset because someone did not agree with me but agreed when someone else said it. I don’t even make mental notes of that stuff. So what, folks have cliques.

Maybe it’s just me. But yeah we all are grown up in here. I hope.

Professor fill in the blank___

September 9th, 2009
2:40 pm

Ok Raqi I said let it GO. I will tell you this, this grown azz woman is NOT worried I just bring things to light. You mentioned the agreement thing. Well I don’t expect for anyone to sit and agree with me, nor was that the point I was making that was your conclusion. Next I have seen folks on this blog get in an Amen corner and you would have thought we were at a Baptist revival w/ all the cheering.
Next, I will say this I come on here as a break. I have friends that I hang with so I am not worried about a dam.n clique but I will call a spade a spade. No I don’t need to professorize on anything. In fact it took me a minute to take you seriously because it was hard to imagine why a grown married woman would continue to talk about her past and three different baby daddies on a dam.n blog????? To me that some ish you take to a therapist.
Have some tea and get your patience back.

W8©

September 9th, 2009
2:41 pm

I know I ignore some folks because they just try to get people riled or or are just bringing drama…or I just dont like them…and just like in real life i will scan right over their post and not even notice whatever it is they posted….if someone is always on some bull(in my mind) nothing they could ever post would garner my interest…and some folks are just brash and not cordial or they like to kick folks when they are down…never speaking life into anyone…they just like drama and negativity..so yeah if they even have a good day I still am not paying any real attention to them

Professor fill in the blank___

September 9th, 2009
2:41 pm

Ok I said let it GO. I will tell you this, this grown woman is NOT worried I just bring things to light. You mentioned the agreement thing. Well I don’t expect for anyone to sit and agree with me, nor was that the point I was making that was your conclusion. Next I have seen folks on this blog get in an Amen corner and you would have thought we were at a Baptist revival w/ all the cheering.

Raqi...Not if he's my man...

September 9th, 2009
2:43 pm

LOL Squashed

AmazonRed™ - tanned to a nice toasted almond brown

September 9th, 2009
2:44 pm

Taliq

September 9th, 2009
2:44 pm

“Taliq- so you mess with the under 25 girls cuz you know older ones wont deal with you?”

lol i guess u could say that … then again i doubt i’m the first man to wanna date people at least 5 yrs younger than him … i stopped tryna figure out y i couldn’t get along with an older chic a while back

W8©

September 9th, 2009
2:45 pm

@Taliq- Either you are hurt deep down or you are grooming yourself to be the next R.Kelly/Michael jackson without the music career…..lmao..you keep getting older and they keep getting younger

Raqi...Not if he's my man...

September 9th, 2009
2:46 pm

I am not even the arguing type so yeah imma leave this alone. And sweetie whether or not you take me serious I don’t care. That’s the problem folks worrying about how others take them.

As Dan said tell you story and let it be. Folks will frown and some will agree.

Raqi...Not if he's my man...

September 9th, 2009
2:48 pm

Amazon LOL. Girl I have been hanging around you too long. You know I am not the one to argue. I just like to discuss the many topics at hand.

Professor fill in the blank___

September 9th, 2009
2:48 pm

Leave it alone, because you squashed it three minutes ago, remember. So don’t come back every three minutes…let it be.

Taliq

September 9th, 2009
2:49 pm

Lioness,
“Taliq-Didn’t you leave her??”

if you’re referring to bday ex, we kinda left each other. I left cause i couldn’t stand being with a chic that wouldn’t back down when i confronted her about her promiscuity. She left cuz she couldn’t stand a dude that snooped especially given that he does dirt too. Too clingy was the final verdict.

If you’re referring to “ex i shoulda married”. Yes I left her cuz she couldn’t bring my pops back to life. When I got back to my senses about 2 years later she’d moved on. She happens to be single again, a part of me thinks I should holla at her. But I dont trust that I’m worthy of being in a serious relationship. I dare not step up to the plate unless i’ve cleaned up my act.

Leggs

September 9th, 2009
2:50 pm

@Raqi ~ not complaining just agreeing with an observation.

Melo

September 9th, 2009
2:51 pm

I just had a moment Raqi/Proff/Leggs/Ms Main etc

thats why be4 i come on the blog, i knda read thru other entries to see where eveone is going..

its from my prior playa training…

eve time i had a girl,we kissing,rubbing,and kinda feeling each other, i neva made a point of phluckking unless i fingered her down there,just to see if it was wet and kinda cop a feel at the shape of that nana…..just make sure my wang aint going to the deep end of some strange like, :mrgreen: u know??

that has lessons for real lyfe too! :lol: :lol: :lol:

did i miss u with that :lol: :lol:

Taliq

September 9th, 2009
2:51 pm

Lioness,
[Sexy- Um, actually, Taliq, knowing that you’re making bad choices and CONTINUING to make them is not “human”, it’s just plain CRAZY.<– I AGREE!!]

Tell that to all the alcholics, cigarette smokers, gamblers etc out there. I never imagined i’d grow into a label of say womanizer. Yet here I am.

Lioness- Envy is a BIYATCH!!!

September 9th, 2009
2:52 pm

Raqi...Not if he's my man...

September 9th, 2009
2:53 pm

Leggs I got that.

Taliq

September 9th, 2009
2:53 pm

W8,
“@Taliq- Either you are hurt deep down or you are grooming yourself to be the next R.Kelly/Michael jackson without the music career…..lmao..you keep getting older and they keep getting younger”

guess i’d better make that 2010 resolution legit then … i’m opting for hurt deep down … but whose to say that aint just another excuse for my lame ways

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

September 9th, 2009
2:54 pm

I can’t believe you all are really taking this Taliq character seriously!LOL!! He LOOKS LIKE calling somebody a garden tool! How is ANYONE he has professed to mess with any bigger ho than he is. Has he ever thought that maybe they sniffed out he was not about jack early on and decided to play him the same way? Like attracts like! He comes on here presenting himself as GHETTO with a capital G but yet claims to be looking for wifey. All along getting older by the minute! News flash, he’s ALREADY WASHED UP!

This ish is hillarious!!!LOL!!!

I’m just having fun, but I got my stylish blog vest on!LOL!!!

Raqi...Not if he's my man...

September 9th, 2009
2:54 pm

Melo you never let me down. LOL
You are a nut.

Lioness- Envy is a BIYATCH!!!

September 9th, 2009
2:55 pm

Taliq- I have NO idea about the bday girl.. I was referring to the girl that you think about when you are with other females..
Your 2:51 makes sense but I still think it is CRAZY

Lioness- Envy is a BIYATCH!!!

September 9th, 2009
2:56 pm

but whose to say that aint just another excuse for my lame ways<– Honesty is the BEST policy!!!

AmazonRed™ - tanned to a nice toasted almond brown

September 9th, 2009
2:57 pm

Amazon LOL. Girl I have been hanging around you too long. You know I am not the one to argue. I just like to discuss the many topics at hand.

Raqi – Yeah, I can sit back and just watch you handle things now. I can’t remember the last time I had a showdown with someone, and I’m good for at least two a week. :lol:

W8©

September 9th, 2009
2:59 pm

@Kimmie- Did you wear that shirt?

AmazonRed™ - tanned to a nice toasted almond brown

September 9th, 2009
3:00 pm

I can’t believe you all are really taking this Taliq character seriously!LOL!!

kimmie – I’m not. Clearly it’s slow today though!

Taliq

September 9th, 2009
3:00 pm

Raqi,
“Taliq you better be careful before you do something or run up on something that you can’t get rid of.”

I know right. I keep praying the good lord watches over me until i get my act together.

Anywho enough said … I just wanted to share my effed up state of mind with some random strangers … seems conclusion is i need some time to learn 2 b alone … i’ll try n put myself into such a situation sooner rather than later (e.g. moving into my mama crib, surely i ain’t crazy enuff 2 bring all em HOs around her) … easier said than done though, but hopefully this will be nothing but an interesting chapter of my life

W8©

September 9th, 2009
3:00 pm

Slaps the jesus out of Ared!!!!!

THE INFAMOUS DK

September 9th, 2009
3:02 pm

Taliq – Honestly little Bro you dont read as a womanizer.. It doesnt seem to me that youre doing the playing. You read like the playee instead of the player.. You falling in love with hookers and thats rule #1.. You cant turn a w-hore into a housewife. #2.. Dont tell these babes that you dont want a relationship then turn around and be snooping on them.. #3.. Stand up because its “Principalities in this here”

I suggest you chill for a while get ya mind right and go from there.. You are gonna crash and burn reall soon going down this path..

Or you can enroll.. I got classes starting right away.. The first lesson is free..

Lioness- Envy is a BIYATCH!!!

September 9th, 2009
3:03 pm

ARed- Clearly :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Taliq

September 9th, 2009
3:03 pm

kimmie,

“Has he ever thought that maybe they sniffed out he was not about jack early on and decided to play him the same way?”

that’s really the point of my post … i find it interesting that i like sex so much … i do more than my fair share of cheating … but get all upset when someone i expect will cheat (based on not trusting them) actually does cheat …

i just wanted to put myself on exhibit on here … to see if i’m really as messed up as i think i am

Raqi...Not if he's my man...

September 9th, 2009
3:04 pm

Amazon, nah not me. I don’t do the arguing. And I definitely don’t do the name calling and attempts of low jabs. Imma let you have it back. LOL

AmazonRed™ - tanned to a nice toasted almond brown

September 9th, 2009
3:05 pm

Slaps the jesus out of Ared!!!!!

And Jesus comes down and smites W8. :lol:

Raqi...Not if he's my man...

September 9th, 2009
3:06 pm

kimmie I already told him love will not wait forever on him. Ain’t no woman going to want him after he is all used up and exhausted with a fused out richard.

Dan

September 9th, 2009
3:08 pm

@DK

Sad thing is, I’m not much older than him and for the life of me none this isht reads “playa” in any way.

Guilt, snooping, wifing a freak….I smell exaggeration (in the least)

AmazonRed™ - tanned to a nice toasted almond brown

September 9th, 2009
3:08 pm

Amazon, nah not me. I don’t do the arguing. And I definitely don’t do the name calling and attempts of low jabs. Imma let you have it back. LOL

Raqi – I don’t know how low it is when it’s simply a stated fact. But naw, you can keep that baton. Besides, I don’t need you on that “you need to get laid” nonsense. :lol:

Melo

September 9th, 2009
3:08 pm

I can’t believe you all are really taking this Taliq character seriously

KIMMIE, not untill i realized he was 30.

at 30, i expect most men to know all they need to know about themselves and women,for the most part.
Unless they have spent the greater part of their life in the pen.

W8©

September 9th, 2009
3:09 pm

@Ared- and I still rise…lol…how you doing girl?

@Raqi- some woman is going to always want him…

AmazonRed™ - tanned to a nice toasted almond brown

September 9th, 2009
3:09 pm

to see if i’m really as messed up as i think i am

Well, acceptance is the first step. But yeah, it’s clear you aren’t ready to change.