Too Soon?
After a break-up, it’s natural to want to get back out there and have a fling. It’s also normal to want a distraction from the misery and void the person has left in your life.
The problem is that sometimes you have post-relationship goggles. You see someone who is probably far from the ideal mate for you as The One, simply because they take your mind off, well the last The One.
Rebounding from a serious breakup takes time and it really needs to be realistic. I have been the rebound girl before and it only bothered me because the man didn’t tell me how recent the break up was. Actually, it turned out being “a break” not a break up, and our short-lived romance ended with a reconciliation with his ex-girlfriend. The one that I had no idea existed in such recent history.
If you want to return to dating after a break up, what do you think is too soon? If you are still having angry outbursts about your ex, is it really a good idea to start a relationship with someone?
Do you disclose your relationship resume, including dates, to the person you are seeing?
Do you think it’s possible for a new romance to have a good chance if one of you just got over a break up?
Do you think men and women rebound at different rates? Or is it more about rebounding in a different way?
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481 comments Add your comment
Raqi
August 20th, 2009
3:53 pm
Tazzee everybody knows stripping down the bed you use before leaving is a standing rule in my house.
But uh, sometimes things just happen you know sleeping in those little full size guest beds with no air conditioner just the sound of the window unit humming and the smell of cucumber melon candles…LOL
SexyCool - If you could feel my joy.
August 20th, 2009
3:53 pm
Swiss – you are not the only crazy ass white boy I know. But you definitely count. *LMAO*
Leggs
August 20th, 2009
3:54 pm
@Randy, because being bad is an aphrodiasiac. One of the major components of people having sex in weird places. It such a turn on being bad!
Wise Diva
August 20th, 2009
3:55 pm
churchlady, please! I am a PK, I know how some church ladies get down, LOL
mytw♥cents
August 20th, 2009
3:55 pm
RAQI Oh, so you’re just pulling the rental over to the first Family Dollar you see when you get to town to get a couple of those shower curtains. Gotcha!
SWIZZ BEATS Yeah, purse-y was cute! I’ll take that over pudsy any day. Wait, I don’t mean I want purse-y… You know what I meant. SexyCool & Jamoca had to learn me about that phrase.
Professor…
August 20th, 2009
3:55 pm
@melo are you saying that church lady gives it up for a small fee or a large fee? I want to know because I respect church lady and I don’t want her walking the Ave. for collection plate money.
So, Mr. Melo, please advise?
THE INFAMOUS SUPERFREAK DK
August 20th, 2009
3:56 pm
My Two – Exactly.. If you catch me then cool but if you dont then you’ll never know.. I’ll even send you some loot for new sheets..
Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)
August 20th, 2009
3:56 pm
@Tazzie, etal… I’m not proud of it, honestly. There is just a “pull” that happens. If I bring a lady to my Mom’s house and she has me sleeping on the couch and the lady in my old bedroom, I can’t help it. It may be right beside my Mom’s bedroom but I WILL be scratching on that door at 2:00 AM. I don’t plan it, but the draw is so strong.
Church lady
August 20th, 2009
3:57 pm
WDchurchlady, please! I am a PK, I know how some church ladies get down,
knah you knows ain’t nuttin wrong wit two clean folks having relations. 2 clean folks cain’t get nuthin durty. IT’S DES IMMORALS HEATHENS BRANGING SHAME! lawd help us
mytw♥cents
August 20th, 2009
4:00 pm
WISEY Everybody says/knows that PKs, Catholic schoolgirls, and girls with glasses are Woooooooooooooooooooooo. I say just embrace it and move on…
Jamoca - "Be" That Voodoo Chile
August 20th, 2009
4:00 pm
…now the milli dollar question now would be: Has anyone ever been caught?…and YES, almost does count (in this particular case scenario).
i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)
August 20th, 2009
4:00 pm
In my best Beavis & Butt-head voice:
Huhhuhhuhuhuh… My2 likes purse-y… huhhuhuhuhuh
Melo
August 20th, 2009
4:02 pm
Proff,no no,??
There is a blogger by the name FEE.She happens to be a spiritual/church lady too,if im not mistaken.
I was asking if church lady is one and the same thing as FEE.
SexyCool - If you could feel my joy.
August 20th, 2009
4:02 pm
I don’t care about grown folks having relations at my house. The only thing disrespectful about it is how loud/wild/vocal they get with it. Don’t be at my house acting like Tarzan and Jane of the Jungle.
If ya mess up my sheets, take them off the bed and throw ‘em in the washing machine.
Save the extra for your house or get a room.
(Besides, sometimes, that silent, intense coupling is the sweetest.)
Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)
August 20th, 2009
4:03 pm
@ Jamoca … meekly raising hand. Play the game too much and you WILL eventually get caught…the hard part is stopping in mid stride.
Leggs
August 20th, 2009
4:05 pm
@Melo, ChurchLady and Fee cannot possibly be the same. Well, technically they can be, but I doubt it very much!
THE INFAMOUS SUPERFREAK DK
August 20th, 2009
4:05 pm
Sexy – Im with you.. I dont care, do you.. And dont be mad if me and my sweetie are doing us.. Just dont be doing all that over the top hokey pokey..
Leggs
August 20th, 2009
4:06 pm
Who caught you Randy?
i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)
August 20th, 2009
4:06 pm
“…now the milli dollar question now would be: Has anyone ever been caught?”
{raising hand}
That would be a big 10-4, Jamoca. Got caught in high school once — by my mom — buck naked with girl on all fours & face buried in that booty… 
Mom ’bout fainted…
Melo
August 20th, 2009
4:08 pm
Randyt,if at ur age,u broght a chic to ur ma house,why wld she insit on u sleeping apart from ur lady,married or single?
Chink
August 20th, 2009
4:08 pm
Is it disrespectful to be intimate under their roof as long as you keep it quiet?
I would say yes if its your parents
AmazonRed™ - so what?
August 20th, 2009
4:09 pm
buck naked with girl on all fours & face buried in that booty…
swiss – Please tell me you are joking!!!
THE INFAMOUS SUPERFREAK DK
August 20th, 2009
4:09 pm
Jamoca – I got caught in High school too.. She was straddling me and her mom ran into the front room and started wailing on both of us.. I had my pants down around my knees and she had her shorts around one ankle. Man I never ran so fast in my life.
Church lady
August 20th, 2009
4:09 pm
with girl on all fours & face buried in that booty… Mom ’bout fainted
wow
THE INFAMOUS SUPERFREAK DK
August 20th, 2009
4:10 pm
Swiss – Now that was funny.. Girl on all fours and face buried.. Wow!! I bet your Mom bout had a stroke..
AmazonRed™ - so what?
August 20th, 2009
4:11 pm
I was a virgin in high school. I would have gotten sent to boot camp had my parents caught me doing those things!!!
Jamoca - "Be" That Voodoo Chile
August 20th, 2009
4:12 pm
LOL RandyT – You too?!!! I was hoping that I would not have to give the first confession, but I definitely have…more than once. Heck, in one case scenario, I/we actually turned down his family member’s offer of allowing the two of us to stay the night, since it had gotten so late after spending the whole day with his family. Then she busts out of nowhere with —>”Ohhhh, no ehhhh???!!!…ya’ll just wanna go off to do some “ol debilment” (devilment) that’s all!” And we’re looking at each other like, “Heyyyyaaallll yeeeaaaahhhh!” LMAO.
…and may I ask by whom? I’m still embarassed at both times that we were caught, I don’t even want to say who it was…two different people, but significant individuals. Good thing that I…let me hush…LOL.
i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)
August 20th, 2009
4:12 pm
ARed — I never joke about booty-munching…
Deacon Such in Such
August 20th, 2009
4:13 pm
Church Lady Go sit yo fat AZZZZZZZZZZZ down!
Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)
August 20th, 2009
4:14 pm
Mom…several times. Did play it smart and at least had the sheet over the anatomical parts. I think it shocked her so much she pretended that she didn’t see anything. Sister-in-law (when married) at least once (actually that was sort of stimulating).
Professor…
August 20th, 2009
4:14 pm
…same here I still had my V-card too, so no worries during that time.
AmazonRed™ - so what?
August 20th, 2009
4:15 pm
ARed — I never joke about booty-munching…
Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)
August 20th, 2009
4:16 pm
Hellz Melo, I guess she still thinks I’m a minor.
Melo
August 20th, 2009
4:17 pm
Is it disrespectful to be intimate under their roof as long as you keep it quiet
Its neva a diss,unless u getcaught.
Now i know some ladies cant shut ther mouf, u just clos the mouf,stick it in and hurriedly leave ur deposits…..
Now it can be messy for uall still on those juvenile condoms…..
(ladies,tmrw on dateline,they have a story on singles hunting, successfully, for men with BIG pockets,on the internets,dont miss it)
Poppa Grande
August 20th, 2009
4:18 pm
Wow! It looks like Skinamax has created a blog on the AJC, and I walked right in it.
Not to be left out
I guess that I’ve been lucky because I wasn’t caught and really got bold with it.
Like doin’, doin’ it, and doin’ it well in her parent’s driveway. Not in the car, either, outside where we could be seen. It was about 9:30 PM in the middle of July. I was 17 at the time. Her parents told her to not let any boys in the house when they weren’t there, so we followed instructions.
Melo
August 20th, 2009
4:18 pm
same here I still had my V-card too, so no worries during that time
dang,dont tell me who snatched it,i may commit a murder..
AmazonRed™ - so what?
August 20th, 2009
4:19 pm
Now it can be messy for uall still on those juvenile condoms…..
Chink
August 20th, 2009
4:20 pm
That is something that ya’ll are still alive I guess its that double standard thing “boys will be boys”
AmazonRed™ - so what?
August 20th, 2009
4:20 pm
Not in the car, either, outside where we could be seen. It was about 9:30 PM in the middle of July.
PG –
mytw♥cents
August 20th, 2009
4:22 pm
SWIZZIE I’m gonna have to buy you a few beers to get more of these stories. Probably have to start smokin’ cigarettes after the first couple
I’ve walked right up on a few others. Nobody I would stay to sneak n watch, but they carried on when I made my exit…
Melo
August 20th, 2009
4:22 pm
My friend Brian was caught by his dad,screwing a chic that he later married,on his parents’ bed,in their house.
It neva lasted 3 yrs.
I believe they neva forgave her for that tackyness,even tho she apologized to his mum and dad.
She committed the ultimate african and ZULU No No!
Leggs
August 20th, 2009
4:25 pm
I’m not even going to ruin this afternoon with a corny joke! This right here is pure d laughter!
Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)
August 20th, 2009
4:26 pm
Not quite the same, but my “transition lover” was a haile of a gin rummy player. One day on the back porch of her townhouse with just that little two foot privacy fence between tne neighbors, she tore me up in a game of “Strip Gin Rummy” and there she is fully clothed and I’m sitting there buck naked with cards in my hand when the neighbor started around the fence…then “somehow” changed his mind. He never looked at my girlfriend quite the same after that.
Poppa Grande
August 20th, 2009
4:27 pm
AR
You are right. It was
, but it definitely made me 
on the way home.
She lived in a neighborhood around Lake Spivey near Stockbridge. It was a pretty well to do area on the Southside.
What’s even crazier, her parents are really good friends with Gen. Colin Powell. Gen Powell finished his military career at Ft. McPherson and they met there. I think that they were actually out to dinner with the Powells that particular night.
Professor…
August 20th, 2009
4:27 pm
Melo…LOL!
Dang Big Poppa now that was BOLD…
Tazzee - Is it Saturday?
August 20th, 2009
4:28 pm
AmRed – yes I prefer my own bathroom, although I broke that rule with my current.
I just got this thing about other folks’ fluids and such. I hate when I got to clean my guest bathroom after someone was there and I find a little curly hair…GROSS!!!
Church lady
August 20th, 2009
4:28 pm
Deacon deacon, you mad cause i’z speakng against da evil in her? we need to bind tagether against the strong hold of heathenism des people committin. you wit me now? or yous mad at me still? a little suga make it betta? alright now, don’t start nuthin in her. oh, by da way, i’z nowhere ner fat.
Poppa Grande
August 20th, 2009
4:28 pm
Corny Joke:
There is this lady and she is struggling having a baby so the doctor brings out these pills and he tells her each of these pills takes away a quarter of the pain, but sends it to the father of the baby.
So she takes one and her husband says “Women are wimps, I feel no pain”
Then she takes another and her husband says “Man this doesn’t hurt.”
So she takes, two more and has no problem having the baby and neither her nor her husband are in pain.
Two days later they come home with the baby and the milk man is dead on their doorstep.
Church lady
August 20th, 2009
4:30 pm
Deacon Such and Such iz zat cho name fo real? call me deacon, i feelz a lil heat brewin. 777-9311, any ara code will do
AmazonRed™ - so what?
August 20th, 2009
4:31 pm