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Clocking In

One of the things that single women really like about meeting a new guy with potential is his willingness to share his time with us. The mystery man can be sexy and alluring in his own weird elusive way, but the man that is consistent and open with his life gets taken a lot more seriously.

I have noticed that a man who wants to be in a relationship with a woman he truly desires he makes the effort to show her who he is. It’s like a subtle way of reassuring her that he wants her to be comfortable with him. At the same time, I think a woman who wants to be in a relationship with a man would be open to showing him that she is just as invested as he is.

I admit that I have a big problem with this. I know, you’re shocked, right? Maybe it is because I have been single for 100 years or have dated some possessive men in my past. I just don’t like it when a guy wants me to clock in, tell him where I am all the time, etc. I realize it doesn’t look good when I answer the question, “Where are you?”, with “Why?”, but it’s a bad habit. I’m working on it though! I think in a way I think that relationships represent a loss of freedom that I cling to…a little too hard.

Do you have a problem with checking in with someone you are dating? Do you think it makes the person feel more a part of your life?

Have you ever felt like dating someone was like a job where you had to clock in and put in some work? Why do you think it feels that way? Is that a sign that you are not ready to be in a committed relationship?

If the person is right for you, would you mind that you were giving up a little freedom to be with them?

195 comments Add your comment

SexyCool

August 19th, 2009
3:08 pm

Dan – You know you just like big words. Teasing…

Blow Me

August 19th, 2009
3:23 pm

ARED…I thought you read Steve Harvey’s book…It was in there in plain english. lol! Don’t drop the ball now. Melo said it. They have to be forced to be accountable…Put your foot down and let them know what it is. Do it or walk plain and simple!

AmazonRed™ - I, Robot

August 19th, 2009
3:27 pm

They have to be forced to be accountable…Put your foot down and let them know what it is.

Blow Me – I know this. My post wasn’t about me. melo made it about me.

Leggs

August 19th, 2009
3:31 pm

And when you put your foot down and stand by your convictions, you may just find yourself alone for a spell until the one who gets what you’re saying steps up to the same podium you’re resting on. Just be aware and don’t back down.

Party in our breakroom. German chocolate lake looked so good. Prettiest cake I’ve seen in a long time. Unfortunately, I don’t like coconut!

Wise Diva

August 19th, 2009
3:33 pm

THANK YOU! Poppa G & Melo, I will take what you wrote and marinate on it. great points. I am sure I give off that vibe, and it’s yet another reason I can’t keep a man, LOL

Blow Me

August 19th, 2009
3:34 pm

**ARED** Oh ok. But yeah its funny to hear a man say it. So they really do like bytches…If that’s what they want thats what they will get.

Dan

August 19th, 2009
3:37 pm

@Blow

Where’d you get the foolish idea that men like bytches?

That may well be the dumbest thing I’ve heard.

AmazonRed™ - I, Robot

August 19th, 2009
3:37 pm

So they really do like bytches…If that’s what they want thats what they will get.

:lol:

Blow Me – As you can tell, I have NO problem chucking the deuces!

Poppa Grande

August 19th, 2009
3:40 pm

Blow

But yeah its funny to hear a man say it. So they really do like bytches…If that’s what they want thats what they will get.

It isn’t about dudes liking bytches.

Riddle me this: Do you respect a dude that you will let you get away with anything and let you treat him any kind of way?

Blow Me

August 19th, 2009
3:40 pm

DAN- Relax..(again) lol. It’s a book. The ladies know what I am talking about. Why men love bytches…It’s a book about relationship. Basically plainly put…Have your own life and don’t stop having one when he gets around..Make him respect you and dont tell him your every move. Keep him guessing.

Melo

August 19th, 2009
3:43 pm

If that’s what they want thats what they will get

Blow Me,u mean, u going to make urslef available to a guy(s)…..as a bytch and like a bytch???

Nice!!
:lol:

Blow Me

August 19th, 2009
3:43 pm

**Poppa** It took me a long time to see it. But we both want the same thing. But women tend to be docile when they are with a man that they are feeling. I am not half way as aggressive as I am on this blog. I am an aggressive head strong person by natural. Not that a man really wants a woman thats’ aggressive…but he does want someone who has boundaries.

Blow Me

August 19th, 2009
3:46 pm

**Melo** No Melo it’s a book…its a book. Not nice..but partially mean

AmazonRed™ - I, Robot

August 19th, 2009
3:53 pm

Have your own life and don’t stop having one when he gets around..Make him respect you and dont tell him your every move. Keep him guessing.

And if he’s hedging on commitment, marriage or anything. Don’t wig out or play games. Just walk. If he realize he’s missed out on a good thing, he’ll come back. But basically, never feel like your needs are not important.

Oh, and don’t act any different after sex. :lol:

Melo

August 19th, 2009
3:53 pm

Blow Me oh…..yeah..!!

we like docile women for easy pudsy

we like strong women for long term.

(we got use for both types) :lol: :lol:

Dan

August 19th, 2009
3:55 pm

@Blow

That goes against the natural give and take of a relationship. By being that aggressive and putting up those walls, you’re not giving the guy you’re dating a chance to get to know you. Likewise depriving yourself of getting to know him.

Ion know, I’d rather be open to experiencing someone as they are than through all that “other” isht. If I git hurt, I git hurt. But it can’t be about creating artificial boundaries. For me at least

Leggs

August 19th, 2009
3:56 pm

Nothing wrong w/being docile to a certain point. No man wants a woman that’s aggressive 24/7. The balance between the two is admirable!

Melo

August 19th, 2009
3:59 pm

why men luv biatches.

If i ever write a book,thats gonna be my title.

AmazonRed™ - I, Robot

August 19th, 2009
4:01 pm

why men luv biatches.

melo – That title is taken!

There is a follow up too “Why men marry bytches.”

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

August 19th, 2009
4:02 pm

Dan – I’ve read the book they are talking about – the basic premise of it is don’t be any man’s pushover or doormat. Even if that’s what she is “naturally”, she needs to get over it. You don’t have to come across like a beast, but just speak up for yourself and have some self-respect. And do all that while being a lady.

Nobody respects a marshmallow.

Blow Me

August 19th, 2009
4:02 pm

**Melo** Funny…But it is true.

**Dan** Finally you have said something that was worth listening too! Congratulations! lmao! Yes I realize you have to have all the walls down to truly get a good and better understanding of who you are dealing with. Its a very hard thing to do, I must admit.

Grace

August 19th, 2009
4:04 pm

Melo ur hitting on some g8 points today! :)

PG I can’t respect a “yes” man or a man who will let me get away with anything, He needs to have a backbone and not so predictable, where’s the balance.

Beautiful

August 19th, 2009
4:04 pm

lol @ Blow.

**Its not the woman’s problem or ur problem.** thanks honey!

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

August 19th, 2009
4:05 pm

Also, the women that are like what is described in the book that I know – have been snatched up or have men lined up to date them. It’s definitely something to it.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

August 19th, 2009
4:08 pm

He will proly have a cpple of trifling heifers on his rotation.But when u step up to him,and he realizes he has a good woman here,thats when he lights up,mentally.

Melo – You’re hillarious, but you’re dropping some gems!LOL!!!

Poppa Grande

August 19th, 2009
4:08 pm

Blow

All right. You got my point. We are different, yet we are the same. Both genders want the same things. Different proportions, but generally the same.

Respect is most men’s #1 thing. If we don’t respect you, there won’t be anything significant long term. I know that females want respect, too. I gotta be able to call Mrs. PG on her BS and she does the same in return. If done right, it can make us both better as individuals and as a couple. Careful with bytchiness because being a bytch could go down that disrespect road, too.

Love is probably down to #3 or #4 on most men’s lists.

AmazonRed™ - I, Robot

August 19th, 2009
4:13 pm

Respect is most men’s #1 thing. If we don’t respect you, there won’t be anything significant long term. I know that females want respect, too.

PG – If I had to make a choice, I’d chose respect over love.

I’ve heard I’m different from most females in that regard.

Leggs

August 19th, 2009
4:22 pm

@ARed, if you have the the “respect” you definitely have the love. Just depends what degree of love a person is willing to accept.

AmazonRed™ - I, Robot

August 19th, 2009
4:36 pm

@ARed, if you have the the “respect” you definitely have the love. Just depends what degree of love a person is willing to accept.

PG – I completely agree.

Seems to me, you get treated better when you are respected first and foremost.

Leggs

August 19th, 2009
4:37 pm

Haaaa, ARed, I said that, not PoppaG!

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

August 19th, 2009
4:37 pm

Where is everybody?

Guess I’ll mosey on down the road(400 & 285)

Yall be easy!

Dan

August 19th, 2009
4:37 pm

@Kimmie

I don’t deal with weak people anyway (they make me queasy).

But like most of these books on relationships, grand on ideas, low on practicality. As opposed to saying “stand for a specific set of principle in life and a relationship…” they say “why men like bytches”.

And see, you have a bunch of literal minded women walking around quoting and following the books advice verbatim without getting the central theme behind it (see also: that Steve Harvey mess). Then when they still ain’t got no man, they wait for the next fad and make the same mistakes.

That’s why I’m writing my relationship book….the market is rife for some high-minded foolishness

AmazonRed™ - I, Robot

August 19th, 2009
4:38 pm

Whoops. Sorry Leggs! Good stuff.

AmazonRed™ - I, Robot

August 19th, 2009
4:40 pm

LOL. If you can’t beat em, join em. :lol:

Poppa Grande

August 19th, 2009
4:43 pm

Leggs/AR

Agreed.

Leggs-You know that I would have given you credit.

For Real

August 19th, 2009
4:44 pm

Kick Em: the disconnect is you keep choosing men that don’t want to be in a relationship. Thus no disconnect.

I have said it once I’ll say it again. RESPECT IS EARNED!!!! You can’t demand it!!

That Bytch book sound like it requires women to do what they claim to hate the most “run game”. Men will recognize your game and reciprocate. Look I like for a woman to behave like a woman. Be soft, pretty and girlie. Now, being soft, pretty and girlie has absolutely nothing to do with begin stupid unless you are stupid. No offense to the stupid chick but hell you stupid so you wouldn’t know I was calling you stupid anyway.

Kym: Here’s another news story for you. I would put a lien on the property of the person that made the mistake.

http://www.nbcmiami.com/news/local-beat/Womans-House-Mistakenly-Auctioned-by-Bank-53583357.html?yhp=1

Leggs

August 19th, 2009
4:49 pm

LOL. If you can’t beat em, join em. or Kick em!

@PoppaG, yes, I know this. But also know if I want my just dues I need to make it known by my own mouth. :wink:

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

August 19th, 2009
4:50 pm

And see, you have a bunch of literal minded women walking around quoting and following the books advice verbatim without getting the central theme behind it

Dan – I gave you the central theme behind the book, though I didn’t need to read it to “get” it. It’s not saying women need to be a B literally, and I doubt if those that are really B’s are that way cause they read it in a book. Those types of books just make for fun conversation on blogs & talk shows. Woe for the person that actually needs to read one to have a successful relationship.

But okay, Dan. Sigh…

Melo

August 19th, 2009
4:55 pm

U food junkies,does blimpie make good food,are they busy???
A blimpie francise is $50k,i see that smewhere.

I can do that!

Leggs

August 19th, 2009
4:57 pm

Goodnight everyone!

Almost at the end of my corny jokes:

I went to a seafood disco last week….and pulled a mussel.

Peace. Love and respect yourself you’re sure to have it returned to you!

Poppa Grande

August 19th, 2009
4:58 pm

Melo

If you follow the laws of supply and demand, Blimpie must not be in high demand to be so cheap for a franchise.

I know cars that cost more than $50K

Melo

August 19th, 2009
4:58 pm

Clocking out

Sakbona kusasa!
See u tmrw……….

Melo

August 19th, 2009
4:59 pm

u right Poppa

ciao!

AmazonRed™ - I, Robot

August 19th, 2009
5:01 pm

:lol: @ kimmie. Right.

Night everyone.

SexyCool

August 19th, 2009
5:02 pm

Man down. Hollluuuuuhhhh!!!!!