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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

No, Seriously

I was asked what the dating scene in Atlanta was like recently. I smiled and said, well, you need three things: healthy dose of self-esteem, loads of patience, and a sense of humor. I think that is pretty much going to keep your dating drama to a minimum.

In your opinion, when you are getting to know someone, is it a waste of time to get to know someone that you think has little potential for “MVP status” with you? I ask because, I think so many times we completely miss the mark on who is actually a good match for us.

Have you ever met someone who seemed like a colossal waste of time, then they turned out to be a great thing?

Are we not willing to take risks in dating anymore? Does that make us big chickens when it comes to match in love and romance?

If you are brave enough to want an actual relationship with someone, how long does it usually take before you take the person seriously? Is it more about their behavior and consistency or the amount of time they have managed not to repulse you? Perhaps a little of both? What are your thoughts?

563 comments Add your comment

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

August 4th, 2009
10:30 am

Amred – Yeah, you’re putting it down today!:)

M'

August 4th, 2009
10:30 am

@Melo

That M. is not ME…M’…lol

Page1908

August 4th, 2009
10:30 am

M- I need a translation for “kept it 100″. Are you saying the crime rate would go up to 100%? I’m lost.

W8©

August 4th, 2009
10:30 am

In Atlanta you have to have a good dating filter and the ability to walk away for the greater good even if it does hurt or bother you. A whole new level of trust in your potential mate. Also don’t catch feelings to soon…these women are smart or so they think…so fellas play your part..play your part (MESSAGE!!) 285 is a circle says alot about you if you get lost on a circle…just saying…

@Page- There were three people on you all’s team to our two..but Marcus and I lost we accept defeat..I thought SCool was our secret spy on your team. Hell Angie, Andrea and Staceye beat me on Playstation American Idol not to long ago…but umm I can’t sing anyway. I need a win streak bad..spades anyone?

Bibay

August 4th, 2009
10:31 am

Dating in the ATL- since I have matured, I have less patience for BS. I don’t have an issue with taking risks (living in the ATL and surrounding areas has become quite risky lately). I try to be clear about what I want up front and see where there head is. But, you just never know what will be revealed.

M'

August 4th, 2009
10:32 am

Well, if most women are flakes then a lot of men are the milk that makes them soggy…lol

Grace

August 4th, 2009
10:32 am

Good morning Folks, I ususally take it slow seeing where the guy is coming from and most def where he is going. I’m not so serious since my seriousness, when I say serious I men micro-managing things, it tend to send a negative vibe with the guy.

Rell in my case I’ve ran across some flakey guys too.

You said it best Ared @ 10.24.

C tha 1

August 4th, 2009
10:32 am

People love to rationalize the purpose one meets anyone is for a reason, season, or a lifetime. That sounds nice but overgeneralizes human interaction. I think today’s topic is asking us to look deeper than that. The truth of the matter is everyone has placed someone in the wrong catagory without taking a chance on them. At the same time we all have highly overated other people we dated simply because they was phine as hell but turned out to be dumb as rocks.

If we meet people for a reason, season, or a lifetime that’s all based on decisions we make. I mean the girl you accidentally got pregnant is now a lifetime partner weather a dude likes it our not…and she could be the bane of your existance. Still you share a child. How about the dude that burned you with whatever “curable” STD that women keep secret and pray to God a worthwhile man doesn’t find out? You can only have so many yeast infections without something being seriously wrong.

Ultimately, the dating scene in ATL is a contact sport that requires keen perception to manuever. It can leave the faint of heart apathetic, but dating in general really is for those who pursue a thrill…whether temporary or otherwise.

AmazonRed™

August 4th, 2009
10:32 am

@Ared: Good answer and I see what you mean.

M – thank you.

I mean, the reality is that many women, maybe even MOST want a fulfilling relationship! At the very least we’re gonna try to keep the momentum going! So if she’s acting flaky, there has gotta be a reason. Look to what YOU are not doing as a man and if you are bringing the A game! If you are doing what you say you are gonna do and bringing more than trying to get in to her pants as quick as possible, then either she is not worty OR someone else is bringing his A-game too.

If she’s not interested that will be determined quickly. So if she interested and acting flaky then there is a reason.

Grace

August 4th, 2009
10:33 am

Oops I meant “when I say serious I mean micro-managing things”

M.

August 4th, 2009
10:33 am

@The Real Rell: True that

@kimmie-livin my life like it’s golden! I just asked a question then my dating life is on trial? Wow….

Melo

August 4th, 2009
10:33 am

can’t make dates, etc because you are managing a roster

i like that Ared.And a player shld be the last person to complain that a girl is being flaky.
I also think that some chics are flaky(to pick on Rell’s point) becoz they are used to being abused.So when they see what seems like similar type tendencies(they may read wrong),they quickly recognize and move on,leaving the dude :shock:
I cant blame them for it,myself.Every person got do what they got do,smetimes u right,other times u wrong.Its lyfe.

W8©

August 4th, 2009
10:35 am

“can we all stop getting our panties in a bunch over wordplay…we(men) know that we have the creme de la creme on this blog and all negative or flakiness does not apply to you wonderful perfect women”

@Rell- let me preface my comment with this..I am nowhere near perfect or where I need to be…but “hell nawwwww” unless you were being sarcastic

The Real Rell

August 4th, 2009
10:35 am

OO and on the slick a zz comments…I SEE YOU and i will respond in person – bee lee dat

M'

August 4th, 2009
10:35 am

Hmmm…and why did I stop “dating” in the ATL in like 1986????…lmao…NO FUN!!!!!

Kym-Don't want no Paper Gangsta

August 4th, 2009
10:35 am

Good Morning All,

I just had a discussion like this with a few friends. I think half of the reason I don’t dig the ATL dating stage is really there is too much foolishness out there. I have patience but I am just not trying to search around “Marshall’s for a good baragin on a coach bag when if I want it I am willing to go all in and pay for it.” It doesn’t mean I don’t date but I am pretty sure that the man that does finally catch me will not come from ATL. I don’t see some of the dudes I run into as flakes..more like fakes.

W8©

August 4th, 2009
10:36 am

If a man or a woman is acting flakey with they other there is a reason..obviousl he or she is not interested enough in the other to make an impact…take the lost and move on.

THE INFAMOUS DK

August 4th, 2009
10:37 am

Kimmie – Up your nose with a rubber hose. You are the funniest.

W8©

August 4th, 2009
10:38 am

@M’- Dang I was 13 in 1986

M.

August 4th, 2009
10:38 am

@Page1908 I mean if everyone kept it real with people they date then he said the crime rate would go up because people cant really handle the reality like if a guy met you and said you cool, but I am dealing with 3 other women and you can be #4 if you like. This kind of stuff could not fly in the dating scene. This what me and my friend were talking about.

Page1908

August 4th, 2009
10:40 am

LOL W8- Ok, I know it’s a circle but still! You are lucky I didn’t come through for the American Idol showdown because if I had, everyone woulda lost lmao. Oh btw- I agree with your 10:36.

M’- LOL @ dating back in 1986.

The Real Rell

August 4th, 2009
10:41 am

bringing the A game!

- WHAT DOES THIS KIT INCLUDE..for or can i just say what do women look for in the A game

Page1908

August 4th, 2009
10:42 am

Ohhhhhh ok M. So kept it 100 means keep it real. Ok, gotcha. Yes, I can see what you mean. But you know what…if the person is being flaky, then I already know I am number 4 or whatever like you said. It wouldn’t take a conversation or the dude to tell me for me to get that….even with my helmet on! lol

AmazonRed™

August 4th, 2009
10:43 am

Some people just cant deal with the reality of someone not being interested in them etc…

My cousin was in Dallas this weekend. She witnessed a young lady being shot in a Denny’s parking lot because a dude was trying to holler and the young lady expressed that she was not interested. :???:

Grace

August 4th, 2009
10:43 am

M. if I meet a guy and he told me upfront that he wants to put me on the rotation I don’t see where that deems me to commit a crime against him. I’d rather him tell me than lead me to thinking I’m the only one when it’s not even close to being true, not that might make me commit a crime.

Melo

August 4th, 2009
10:43 am

thank uall on the definition of M!

not feeling smebody the way they feeling u cant be regarded as flaky either.

but bottom line was after i thought i made a good purchase the remorse set in

Now For Real,thats flaky!! unless the purchase was made after just five minutes or so of rumination.

When u make a purchase,make sure it is a deliberate and serious decison!

W8©

August 4th, 2009
10:43 am

Rell check your text msgs

M'

August 4th, 2009
10:44 am

RIP Naomi Sims…what a fabulous life, career and woman.

Page1908

August 4th, 2009
10:45 am

ARed- omg that’s horrible.

AmazonRed™

August 4th, 2009
10:45 am

Amred – Yeah, you’re putting it down today!:)

Thank you.

M.

August 4th, 2009
10:47 am

@Grace I dont mean committing a crime against them right then and there. We meant when people get lead on and their feelings get hurt, that’s when bad things happen.

@Page1908 LOL got you with the helment thing but how you know he is flaky if you just met him, what if he came to you correct? Do you have a 7th sense we dont know about? ;)

Bibay

August 4th, 2009
10:47 am

Grace- your 10:43 response to M are my exact thoughts. Then you can decide if you want to be a number or walk away. Sometimes folks make things harder than they need to be.

M'

August 4th, 2009
10:48 am

@w8

Yeah, Iwas doing 13 in 1973…lol…I said I is an oldhead…hehehe

@Page

Yeah…did not start until 1983…and stopped 3 years later…lol…I was just so turned off by it…absolutely had no fun with it…so I pulled out my “single shimmy” boots…and kept steppin’…went out solo and found my own good time…lol…and ain’t looked back since.

W8©

August 4th, 2009
10:49 am

@M’- disco disco

Raqi

August 4th, 2009
10:53 am

These M’ & M. s are getting me confused.

M'

August 4th, 2009
10:53 am

@W

Keep on when the force stops…don’t stop til you get enough…and my force ain’t stop and I ain’t got enough…lmao.

Mo (aka Moeisha-)

August 4th, 2009
10:54 am

Morning All

Im speed reading so Im trying to catch up

ARed – on your 10:43, I had a friend in college get shot by a guy that she had been seeing when she tried to break up with him. its crazy how rejection can make some people really lose it.

Page1908 – “So kept it 100 means keep it real”…you are so funny chica!

Page1908

August 4th, 2009
10:56 am

LMAO M’ @ dating from 1983 to 1986! Dang, that’s a long time ago. But, I bet there are still some of the same ole cat daddies on the scene too. lol. Do you still have any 80’s outfits? lol All I remember from that time was jerry curls, ruffled mini skirts and stockings, leather pants and jackets, and mullets. LOL

Kym-Don't want no Paper Gangsta

August 4th, 2009
10:56 am

@Raqi apparently there is a M. and a M’ I think M’ is a woman Mkaryl and I don’t know who the hell M. is.

W8©

August 4th, 2009
10:57 am

Um let’s not forget that psycho women far out weigh psycho men during breakups or rejection…..but oh I know it’s always the mans fault right..lol

If he cheats he’s a dog…if she cheat’s that means he did something to make her cheat…lmao

Page1908

August 4th, 2009
10:57 am

Hey Mo! LOL Girl, you know I needed a translation on that one. I’m thinking to myself soooo…”ok, so why not just say keep it real”? *ctfu*

Grace

August 4th, 2009
10:58 am

M. that’s why I ended my comment with it may be a crime if he misleads me. Let me decide where/what I want to be, who knows I might be alright being on a rotation. (not talking bout physical here)

Leggs

August 4th, 2009
10:59 am

Well, if most women are flakes then a lot of men are the milk that makes them soggy…lol HOW TRUE, HOW TRUE!

AmazonRed™

August 4th, 2009
11:01 am

Sometimes folks make things harder than they need to be.

Amen.

Yesterday on Facebook one of my friends changed her relations status to “it’s complicated.” Someone asked her what meant and she went into a story about how she’s with this guy but not really with himm… :???: I’m like “is this chick reading her own foolishness and is she really broadcasting it proudly for all to see???”

Some folks just like drama in their lives, apparently.

M'

August 4th, 2009
11:02 am

@Page

My fashion sense is “immortal” in that it transcends all time periods…lol…I do not do “trends” so much…and most 80’s fashions were hideous trend moments…I like to rock the classic lines of the 50’s, the mod of the 60’s and the hippie chic of the 70’s…I hook it up and make it work, chirl…lol…I do M’Fashion so well…lmao.

As far as the old cat daddies…yeah, dem lame sums of bishes are still out there…with the same game, lines and foolishness…seriously…I had no need for it then and truly less patience for it now…it is like being stuck on a bad movie rerun…it was not good the first time you saw it and it gets worse every viewing of it after that…lmao

THE INFAMOUS DK

August 4th, 2009
11:03 am

You know I always hear women say if a dude just told me what his intentions are I could have made a better decision. No you wouldnt have and on top of that ya’ll never tell us what ya’lls intentions are. Ya’ll cant expect what ya’ll not giving.

Ya’ll tell us only what ya’ll think we should know and we do the same.

Mo (aka Moeisha-)

August 4th, 2009
11:04 am

W8 – I think the psycho men, as of late, are creeping on a come up in outweighing the pyscho women. There have been more men losing it and killing women recently than I ever remember hearing.

Page1908 – its funny b/c you are soo sincere, like ‘huh?’ And I LMBAO @ Mullets! :smile:

ARed – like your 10:32

AmazonRed™

August 4th, 2009
11:04 am

I had a friend in college get shot by a guy that she had been seeing when she tried to break up with him. its crazy how rejection can make some people really lose it

Damn.

If something like this every happened to me it’d probably be from someone on this blog. :???:

W8©

August 4th, 2009
11:05 am

@Mo-Men just have more bite than women..thats all

THE INFAMOUS DK

August 4th, 2009
11:07 am

W8 – “If he cheats he’s a dog…if she cheat’s that means he did something to make her cheat…lmao”

Man preach on.. I’ll say amen if nobody else does.