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Misadventures in Atlanta

Testing, Testing

8:00 am July 29, 2009, by Wise Diva

Whether he is a player or a great guy, some men have a way of screening women to qualify her, so to speak. From the moment they spot her the initial screening test begins. He is really curious about her and wants to know what she is about and what caliber of woman she is.

The information they gather through their random tests help them determine different things about the woman. Things such as her desperation level, her patience, her perception, her inhabitations, even her “sanity”.

Now, I am not knocking the men for their pre-relationship/marriage screening tests. I believe that there are just some things men need to be sure about before they give up their bachelor lifestyle and freedom.  I have experienced a few male tests in my dating career. Some I failed miserably, and some I passed.

Ladies, chime in with any dating tests you have administered or experienced on/with men. Guys, tell us about the tests that women have put you through.

How do you know when your “dating performance” is being rated?

Do you think these dating tests are helpful or harmful? What mistakes do men and women make with date tests?

One challenge in the dating scene is getting useful feedback. If there are areas of improvement, how do we convey this to one another?  Should we even try to give feedback?

How many of us are conducting date/mate tests right now?

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109 comments Add your comment

Grammar King

July 29th, 2009
9:19 am

I think you mean “inhibitions” in your first paragraph. Inhabitation, although it is recognized as a form of the verb “inhabit,” is awkward and probably rarely used.

Raqi...I am the test...Diamant

July 29th, 2009
9:33 am

Ironically I had a built in test my entire adult dating career…my boys. That there was the test. All I had to say was I have a kid, or two, and that alone was the screening process.

While the fact was just unavoidable I did throw it out there a time or two or three just to see the reaction.

Also with my kid(s) as the test, the was one in particular that I remember that I conveniently needed to pick up something for my son while on a date. One guy failed that test. There was another time where I had to get something for my son and it could not be avoided. The man at the time passed that test brilliantly.

The screening process is necessary but I think it should only be deliberately done when it comes to things that really matter and are important. That would rule out childish games.

Kym-I am the mystery in the room

July 29th, 2009
9:33 am

@Swiss..I am not sure what link you were sending me the other day..but if it is the one of the couple dancing down the aisle to Chris Brown’s Forever…I LOVE IT!!!! I am not big on marriage but if a dude will dance(must like dancing) then we can talk. That is the best wedding entrance ever.

Professor

July 29th, 2009
9:37 am

Good Morning:

Well I guess it is the “Professor” in me that realize that “testing” is only one of several assessments used. Instead of “testing” people I prefer different to use other techniques. IMO testing can sometimes come across as a silly little dating game, but my other techniques are a little subtler and the outcomes are more accurate.

Have a happy hump day.

Melo, how are ya?

Raqi...I am the test...Diamant

July 29th, 2009
9:39 am

The thing about my dating career was, although my kid(s) would not be a part of my dating life, they were a part of me. Most guys never got the chance to meet my kids, but there were times where my kid’s needs was more important than anything that I would or could have been doing at the time. For me guys had to understand that I had to tend to my kids when the need arose.

Their wants for no good reason could easily be ignored or put off, kids will be kids, but their needs had to be dealt with.

Professor

July 29th, 2009
9:41 am

I forgot to add that I am usually a little annoyed when a grown man feels like testing me. My thing is just ask me an in-depth behavior based question and I will answer it, but please don’t try a silly little test on me to see how I will do. I am not into games, hypnotically based situations etc., instead I like to deal with things head on and discuss them like adults.

Raqi...I am the test...Diamant

July 29th, 2009
9:42 am

There is a thin line between screening and just playing foolish games.

Raqi...I am the test...Diamant

July 29th, 2009
9:48 am

I think one of the most popular tests that were laid out before me was the inexpensive date test. It got quite obvious. It was like he would pull up to a place and try to watch the expression of my face to see how I would react. Well what most guys didn’t know about me is one of my favorite places to eat is the Waffle House. For some that is about as low as you can get taking a woman out. It’s not as low as man would like to think. Waffles are one of my favorite foods so even if the date was a lame dud I still got something that I liked.

Raqi...I am the test...Diamant

July 29th, 2009
9:54 am

There are all kinds screening processes in dating.

As I already mentioned the value date is one. Then there is the friends and family test for the more seasoned dates…how well do you get along with you own friends and family and then mine. Then you have the adaptability dates…dates to see how well you adapt in unfamiliar situations and activities. The sportsmanship dates. The creativity dates.

There are many more but right now I have a change-a-diaper date…

Professor

July 29th, 2009
10:04 am

One of the best assessments to use is observation, and I mean natural observation not trying to set up a certain environment to see how a person will respond, but letting nature takes its course. If you are on the phone just listen to what the person is telling you. If you are in person just observe how that person treats you and others around you. I have had men boast about their material possessions, but was unable to even show me a key to the car less more the car itself. Also I like a guy that can remember the small things it shows a bit of compassion to me. Example breakfast is my favorite meal and a guy remembers that…good sign. I do not eat beef or pork, but every date we are heading to the steakhouse…not a good look.

For me observation in the natural setting is key. Also I like for guys to hold me to that same standard and not create some test or quiz, but observe me in my natural environment.

SexyCool - High Level, Not Eye Level

July 29th, 2009
10:21 am

Three Words Daily – Excellence requires diligence.

SexyCool - High Level, Not Eye Level

July 29th, 2009
10:25 am

Kym – The JK Wedding Dance made me cry. That is what bliss looks like. I was moved by their joy.

SexyCool - High Level, Not Eye Level

July 29th, 2009
10:26 am

Don’t know where my Three Words went – but I will try it again.

Three Words Daily – Excellence requires diligence.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
10:26 am

Good morning good people!

Yes, I hate tests or screenings when it’s glaringly obvious I’m being tested! In fact, that right there might get you dismissed from me. It’s too calculated & manipulative. At least be a little subtle, have a little style! I’m a private person and slow to give my heart, but let’s just date & get to know each other and let everything take it’s course naturally. Don’t have time for games!

I had been dating this guy about a month and a half once. We were both taking a nap & then he went out to grab some food, leaving me alone in his apartment. What I didn’t know was that he had set little traps all over, like putting a little piece of clear tape on some of his drawers so if I opened them the seal would break. I did not move from the spot I was in when he left, just layed there in and out of sleep, watching tv. He was shocked when he came back & nothing was touched! He told me what he had done. I told him I was raised not to go through other people’s things and anyway I had no interest, was not “looking” for anything concerning him! He said I had behaved differently than all of the other women he had dated! I told him in my case he had definitely upgraded then!

SexyCool - High Level, Not Eye Level

July 29th, 2009
10:32 am

I’m not a tester. I am a listener and an observer. Even so, there are certain qualities and factors that must be in place before I ever care to begin paying attention to what you say and do.

So, yeah, I’m paying attention to Mine right now.

M'

July 29th, 2009
10:34 am

My thing is just ask me an in-depth behavior based question and I will answer it, but please don’t try a silly little test on me to see how I will do. I am not into games, hypnotically based situations etc., instead I like to deal with things head on and discuss them like adults.

Uh-huh…and amen to that Professor

To me it is more like I am being scrutinized by a subjective standard of assessment…that is one reason the dating scene in the ATL turned me off years ago…like 1986…I do not like being put up on to “see” how I will act or react…it is just games and noise…I truly prefer open, engaging conversation about whatever a person wants to know and is willing to discuss.

Fred G. Sanford, Jr.

July 29th, 2009
10:36 am

It’s not really a test, but I always watch how a woman responds when the bill comes. If she doesn’t offer to contribute towards whatever we do, I take note.

Money is tight for everyone in this economy, and I think the courteous thing to do is at least offer to contribute. To me, it shows that she’s a team player.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
10:38 am

M’ – I agree, let’s just TALK! I’m not a lab rat! The dating scene turned me off too, lady. I just dropped totally out of it a few years after college. I met people thru family & friends, hobbies or out & about, like meeting my current SO at Publix!

i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)

July 29th, 2009
10:44 am

Kym — Yep, that (the wedding entrance) is what I linked to the other day. I’m just pyssed that they beat me to the punch — I had planned to enter to Wild Cherry… :lol:

Kym-I am the mystery in the room

July 29th, 2009
10:48 am

@SexyCool..I didnt cry..I felt like dancing..they looked like a fun couple, who truly enjoyed each other and they had fun friends..I like that. Plus, it was totally non-traditional–even better. I am going to download the song from i-tunes too…damn the haters that is a cute song with nice lyrics. Chris Brown should send them something nice.

SexyCool - High Level, Not Eye Level

July 29th, 2009
10:51 am

Kym – I was dancing too until the bride danced in. Seeing her joy did me in. You know how the ol’ folk say in church – I just got full.

anonymousella

July 29th, 2009
10:53 am

i don’t have “tests” per se. there are just a few situations that happen when dating that i keep an eye on, namely how you travel, how you handle money, and how you treat service folks (waitstaff at restaurants, cashiers, etc.).

much like kimmie, if i see that a dude is trying to test me or figure me out, i get annoyed. and the fact that you feel the need to test me or any woman lets me know that your low-expectation having a** has more issues than national geographic. you have just proven that you mistrustful, damaged, and possibly guilty of that for which you testing.

hrm, so maybe that’s my test.

Kym-I am the mystery in the room

July 29th, 2009
10:59 am

@Swiss do it anyway.. Forever, Forever, Me you on the dance floor…

On Topic..Please don’t test me..I hate that stuff we too old for that crap. I am not going to test you. Just spend time with the person and really get to know them..you are not going to like everything about that person and they are not going to like everything about you. Compromise, common ground, look for those things and investment in that.

@kimmie I think that is a hoot. I don’t snoop in other folks stuff cause I don’t want you looking in mine. Who knows what you might find. But I think some guys have become so freaking gun shy that lump everyone in the same catagory.

Mo (aka Moeisha-)

July 29th, 2009
11:04 am

Hey Err’body!!

Okay Swiss could you post that link cause I want to see what everyone is gushing about.

SCool – I too like to just listen and observe, Im not for tests per se but I do look for certain things

AmazonRed™ - vacay is coming...

July 29th, 2009
11:06 am

Morning All -

I am anti test. Folks who need to purposely set up situations to “test” someone need a better screening process. Time and life with give you situations that will show you what a person is made of without you having to manufacture stuff.

I think folks test, because they want to cut corners. You want to get laid as fast as possible, so you don’t take time to really pay attention or get to know someone.

I don’t test people. I take my time and if that moves “too slow” for some then get gone then.

Raqi...I am the test...Diamant

July 29th, 2009
11:07 am

I saw that wedding dance on GMA, I think, the other morning. They had the entire wedding party there and reenacted the whole thing live. My girl friend sent me the link via email before then.

AmazonRed™ - vacay is coming...

July 29th, 2009
11:10 am

What I didn’t know was that he had set little traps all over, like putting a little piece of clear tape on some of his drawers so if I opened them the seal would break. I did not move from the spot I was in when he left, just layed there in and out of sleep, watching tv. He was shocked when he came back & nothing was touched! He told me what he had done.

Ugh. That would probably be my last date with that guy! If he felt the need to to all that, don’t have me over and leave. Trust should come into play at some point without having to set traps!!!

Kym-I am the mystery in the room

July 29th, 2009
11:14 am

@Raqi that was the Today show..and nothing beats the original video..I named one of the dancers Tom Willis. LMAO I wish them much happiness.

AmazonRed™ - vacay is coming...

July 29th, 2009
11:15 am

I guess I’m the only one who thought the wedding dance thing was cheesy. And I like corny cheese stuff. I think my expectations were high because I had heard about it before I saw it.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
11:22 am

I don’t snoop in other folks stuff cause I don’t want you looking in mine.

Kym – Okay! You don’t go in NOTHING of mine unless you ASK! My mom drummed that in our heads so much that, after she passed away and I had to deal with her things, I felt SO scared clearing out her closets & purses & drawers! I had to laugh and say she taught me well!

Amred – Luckily he had other redeeming qualities that made him a keeper, we were both young. In fact, almost married him, that was my Cali man from San Diego that was here going to grad school. I think he was paranoid from others he had dated. He soon learned stuff like that was just not necessary with me.

AmazonRed™ - vacay is coming...

July 29th, 2009
11:27 am

I think he was paranoid from others he had dated.

kimmie – Apparently so! He should have figured out a better way to follow the signs without having to set up boobie traps. :lol:

He’s gonna test the wrong one one of these days! :lol:

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
11:30 am

Amred – Well, he’s married to someone else now, so that’s HER problem, so not mine anymore! But yeah, he could have gone about it better and believe me I gave him a hard time about it!

For Real

July 29th, 2009
11:38 am

For Real now putting tape over Kimmie’s CT and you betnot break the seal!

i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)

July 29th, 2009
11:46 am

Here you go, Mo…

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
11:51 am

For Real – Go sit down!!!

Kym-I am the mystery in the room

July 29th, 2009
12:05 pm

@Swiss the best parts are the best man doing the handstand and the groom doing the somersault geting up straighten his tie and keep the party going. I was cracking up!!!

Raqi...I am the test...Diamant

July 29th, 2009
12:06 pm

Thanks Kym yeah the Today show.

Raqi...I am the test...Diamant

July 29th, 2009
12:07 pm

don’t snoop in other folks stuff cause I don’t want you looking in mine.

I have looked in medicine cabinets before. And I have had my medicine cabinet invaded.

AmazonRed™ - vacay is coming...

July 29th, 2009
12:15 pm

For Real now putting tape over Kimmie’s CT and you betnot break the seal!

:lol:

i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)

July 29th, 2009
12:17 pm

And while I’m posting links… I promised this the other day when the Purple Rain anniversary came up, so here’s a bootleg of Prince from Phillips from a few years back:

http://karaokebus.tzo.com/files/Concert%20Bootlegs/Prince/

When prompted, enter:

username: superfreak
password: jenny8675309

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
12:22 pm

Swiss – I went to that concert! I’ve seen Prince 3 times, saw MJ 5 times, 3 with his brothers, saw Sade and Stevie Wonder once. Hands down the greatest concerts ever!

I am so spoiled now, I am used to seeing TOP acts. For me to spend money & time to go see you, you better BRING IT!

AmazonRed™ - vacay is coming...

July 29th, 2009
12:24 pm

Here you go, Mo…

Dang, that video has over 11 MILLION hits. And you know everyone is gonna copy that going forward.

I would do something like that for my reception entrance. One of my friends came into “Crazy In Love” by Beyonce during her reception. I would have never thought to use such a song, but it really worked and got the crowd hyped.

Kym-I am the mystery in the room

July 29th, 2009
12:29 pm

ARed Chris Brown was number 10 on the itunes poplist..other day he was 6 so the song is popular because of the video. Again Chris needs to send them a present…what’s funny is it is the song from the Doublemint commercials.

AmazonRed™ - vacay is coming...

July 29th, 2009
12:37 pm

Again Chris needs to send them a present…

For real do!

M'

July 29th, 2009
12:37 pm

@kimmie

Just getting back to the keyboard…saw your post…I think that the way you met your SO is more in line with what allows for a natural flow…you were doing a regular activity…and met another regular person doing so…works for…now, if I can just figure out how to work in a regular interaction with that fine firefighter who checked my BP yesterday when it hit 176/110…hmmm, but the dr. at N’side said that since my BP is erratic and not consistently high that I need to keep a daily journal…lol…so I guess that means I will be at Station 29 on a regular basis…lol…I ain’t right…but dang he is fine.

M'

July 29th, 2009
12:37 pm

meant works for me

Mo (aka Moeisha-)

July 29th, 2009
12:38 pm

Thanks Swiss! Too freakin funny, but quite cute

Randyt (AKA been there, done that, throwing out some t-shirts)

July 29th, 2009
12:55 pm

My big one is how a woman talks to others that she doen’t have to be nice to, i.e. store clerks, servers, etc. If she doesn’t have a heart, then all the looks in the world still just make her a piece of plastic. IMHO.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
12:57 pm

M’- LOL!! You sound like me after my accident with the tractor trailer! From the firemen/paramedics to the emergency room doctor, I have never seen so many fine AA men in my life! And they were MANLY men! Thought I might have died & gone to heaven! Go on and get that man, girl, I have seen so many fine firefighters!

M'

July 29th, 2009
12:58 pm

@Randy

That is an important aspect of character assessment that I value very highly too…I had an acquaintance who was like that, she always spoke in demeaning and belittling ways to store clerks, servers…actual anyone who provided her with services…it drove me up a wall…as I have also done that type of work at various times in my life…the holier than thou noise.

M'

July 29th, 2009
1:02 pm

@kimmie
LMAO chirl…well he had no rings on his fingers…lol…my BP was not so high that I was BLIND…fool that I am…but he is a bit young…I may be as old as his mother…lol…oh, oh snap cougar tendencies…but PHINE as he is I do not think that I really care…in fact, most of the brothers in that station are good looking men…today I am at 150/100…and I have to keep the daily journal for the next 2 weeks…oh yeah.

Raqi

July 29th, 2009
1:17 pm

It is amazingly quiet in here. I actually expected the total opposite with WiseDiva not being on guard. Trully surprising.

M'

July 29th, 2009
1:25 pm

@Raqi

I was thinking the same thing…what happened to e’erbody????

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
1:28 pm

today I am at 150/100

M I am glad you mentioned that. I have been in sort of a blue funk since after eating lunch I was wondering why. After reading your post I checked my blood sugar level.

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
1:30 pm

I don’t know M is kind of strange. When Diva is looking on folks tend to want to jump right in and change the topic, but now that she is not here it’s dead.

Do you think they just like messing with her in changing her topics??? LOL

M'

July 29th, 2009
1:34 pm

@Raqi
Cool…I am hoping that this is a short term issue for me…I have been like 120-130 over 70-80 for years…this just started last year while I was still in the VA…and next week it may be my normal level again…so, I am going to put more walking back in my schedule b/c that really changed when I was in VA…lol…there are some obvious health benefits to being on MARTA.

M'

July 29th, 2009
1:39 pm

Seems like it is just you and me…lol…and the topic always changes…it goes with the program…sometimes there are several topic changes going on at once…but this has been a low post blog today….hmmmm

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
1:42 pm

I have never really had issues with my BP. Mason had an elevated BP at his last check up so I have been trying to make an effort to cook with less salt and he tries to exercise a little more. Some evenings after dinner we put the baby in the stroller and go for a walk. That’s beneficial to us all.

I think everyone may probably be over in ChaPan. I noticed a lot of new names over there when I peeked in yesterday from when I was commenting there regularly. That could be them.

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
1:44 pm

LOL So you and I could pretty much talk about anything. I could probably post my government name, SS#, bank accounts and home address and still be safe it’s so dead in here.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
1:52 pm

It’s been dead in here all week.

i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)

July 29th, 2009
1:52 pm

“So you and I could pretty much talk about anything. I could probably post my government name, SS#, bank accounts and home address and still be safe it’s so dead in here.”

You’re absolutely right, Raqi. Your conversation is totally private — I suggest you talk about naughty girl-stuff. The more detail the better. No one is listening… it’s all cool… ;-) :lol:

M'

July 29th, 2009
1:53 pm

What is ChaPan??

Well, I have a fairly decent diet…and I do low sodium cooking and when I do use salt, I prefer sea salt…but I am going to make some adjustments b/c I do not want to be bound to a pill for it the rest of my life.

Page1908

July 29th, 2009
2:12 pm

@ M- maybe you should try Braggs Apple Cider Vinegar to get your bp down. It’s $2.99 at the health food store and is considered a “miracle cure” for many conditions including high bp. I swear by it. I take 2 tablespoons a day every day. Back in November 2006 my dr. told me that my bp wasn’t high, but slightly higher than what they like to see in a 30 yr old woman. She said that if it got higher I would have to beging taking bp meds. Man, that scared me straight! I got online and talked to people and found out about ACV and started taking it. 2 months later, I had dropped 15 pounds and get this, when she checked my bp she was like “wow, i can’t believe this! How did you get your bp down so much so quickly? Your bp and other bloodwork is better than mine”!

Jamoca's - Taken to the Top of the World

July 29th, 2009
2:14 pm

Cause lovin’ you has made my life so beautiful, And every day my life is filled with lovin’ you

Lovin’ you i see your soul come shinin’ through, And every time that we oooooh…I’m more in love with you

La la la la la-la la la la la-la la la la laaa
la-la la la la… do do do do do dooo….
(now as I bust the windows, while hittin’ this high note)
Haaaaaaa-aaaaaahhhh-aaaaahhh-aaaaahhhh-aaahhh-aaaahhhhhhhh

ON TOPIC

Yes, I prefer “the natural order” of things over “being tested”…however, I do expect that the man would observe how I’d normally handle a particular scenario…to include my demeanor, disposition etc…and that part does not bother me so much. Just because he may not go out of his way to single handedly (sp?) create the situation, does not mean that I’m not being “tested” IMO. I expect the man to have standards to a certain degree. And by making a mental note to himself based on his observations sounds to me like he’s judging my reactions (if any) of how well I not only interact with others, but how well I maintain my composure and/or express myself in particular settings.

I just think it works both ways. While he’s checkin’ me, I’m more than likely checkin’ him. How else do we decide if an individual is the best match for us? A test is a test…whether or not it’s administered directly or vicariously in natural everyday living. Not that big of a deal to me…however the only exception to that is if the man has trust issues. Then it’s a no-go.

Otherwise…I have much bigger fish to fry than to get my tailfeathers ruffled over the person making simply observations. JMO

…you all must’ve ran out of refreshments in here…it’s so quiet I’d swear you can hear a group of mice pyssin’ on cotton

Oh

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
2:17 pm

M my friend Doc said that it is not so much of what you eat but how you cook it. I try to do the right thing for the most part but every now and then we cheat. I sometimes like to cook desserts and I have been trying a few out with equal or honey instead of sugar. Some stuff just has to have real sugar. LOL Almost every day I think about cooking something but I fight that urge because I know I will regret it in a couple of months. Sitting here pretty much all day eating pies, cookies and cheesecakes that I have cooked…Oh No.

M'

July 29th, 2009
2:24 pm

@Page

Thanks…I will get some…I am not in a critical state but I do not want it to get worse…I see if I can find it at Return to Eden or Sevananda.

@Raqi

Yes, that is true…it is more about how you prepare the food…I do not eat much fried food…I prefer to steam, bake, broil or grill most of my meat items…and I like to use high fiber grains for my breads, rices, pastas and cereals…and I also like to cook fresh vegetables when I can, either steamed or sauteed in EVOO…but I am a smoker and that does not help me much either…lol…and I heard an earful from the firefighter and the doctor yesterday about that…so I really need to add quitting to my agenda real soon.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
2:25 pm

Page – Several people I know use the ACV! I bought a bottle years ago – don’t have a BP problem at all, but wanted to use it for weight control and overall health. I fell off the wagon – need to get back on!

M'

July 29th, 2009
2:27 pm

ACV???????

Page1908

July 29th, 2009
2:31 pm

Yeah, Kimmie, the ACV is so great. Someone told me it’s in that book called “cure’s they don’t want you to know about” or something like that. It is good for so many things you know. It’s amazing what information we don’t know.

M- ACV is short for apple cider vinegar.

Wise Diva

July 29th, 2009
2:33 pm

I think that topic changing theory has wings LOL, I’m on the beach wondering why I don’t live here! I feel so at home :)

mytw♥cents

July 29th, 2009
2:34 pm

Why test when you can simply PAY ATTENTION?

My friends came out to Crazy in Love at their reception a few years ago. It was hot. Then this couple whose wedding I planned thought about Ne-yo’s You Make Me Better but opted against.

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
2:37 pm

I heard that ACV should not be consumed over a long period of time. I can’t remember why but that’s what I heard.

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
2:39 pm

I’m on the beach wondering why I don’t live here!

WiseDiva I am glad you are having a nice time. I need a vacation from sitting at home every day. LOL

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
2:42 pm

M’ How is it you cook healthy then turn around and suck on a cancer stick? Girl put those things down.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
2:43 pm

Raqi – If taken straight over a long period it can erode tooth enamel & cause acid reflux. The solution to that is to dilute it in water & you’ll be fine.

M'

July 29th, 2009
2:49 pm

@Raqi

Right…lol…well I started the bloody habit when I was like 16 or so…and by 18 it was a serious habit…and a hard one to break…but I actually changed my cooking style due to digestive disorders that were causing me problems more than really trying to eat more healthy…lol…but this last price increase has me cussing myself out every time I buy a pack of smokes…eventually, I may make myself mad enough to quit…lol

Tazzee - countdown to Pensacola Beach

July 29th, 2009
2:51 pm

Afternoon folks!

I shared that wedding link on my FB page…that brought a great big smile to my face.

Don’t like tests and don’t give them. Like others have said, I prefer the natural order of things. With ‘time and pressure’ all will be revealed.

Wise Diva – I’m jealous of you on the beach right now, I’ll be there in a little over one week. Have fun getting kissed by the sun.

OK, so I’m going to keep my godson overnight for the first time this Friday. My 13 yr old nephew is staying the night too but I’m still scared of keeping a toddler for over 12 hours….

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
2:51 pm

Vicky is having an awesome sale. I think I may run by her house tomorrow and pick some things.

I might just pick up a couple of bathing suits and test them out with my present post birth body.

Lord Velonese

July 29th, 2009
2:51 pm

My tests are designed not to be passed. I will not explain my methods either; I don’t want women to have more ammo on luring or taking advantage of lesser men.

Page1908

July 29th, 2009
2:51 pm

lmao @ “pack of smokes”.

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
2:53 pm

16????.

i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)

July 29th, 2009
2:59 pm

D@mn. Just d@mn. Okay, my only question is: Who’s pitching & who’s catching? Yikes….

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
3:05 pm

Sometimes the look in this baby’s eyes seems to be saying “Lady, one day imma give you hell!!!”

M'

July 29th, 2009
3:07 pm

@Raqi

Yeah 16…just one dumb move…I do not even remember if I did it to be “cool” or out of rebellion…regardless, it is one of the dumbest decisions that I ever made…but, now that I need to have my BP checked everyday and the firefighters at the station will do it for me to help me keep a log…I feel guilty…lol…but I really do b/c even the sister who took it today spoke with me about it…so maybe the positive reinforcement from them and my guilt may serve as a good motivation…coupled with me calling myself some ignorant names when I pay these outrageous prices for a death stick…hmmm, I wonder if it will impress Mr. Phine Firefighter if I quit….lol

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
3:09 pm

Swiss where in the world do they…??? Nevermind, I know. Columbia S.C.

Raqi...Mildly Hyperglycemic

July 29th, 2009
3:12 pm

M’ try cinnamon sticks. One day my husband’s friend came over the house and he had a cinnamon stick in his mouth just like a cigarette. I asked him why and he said he is trying to stop smoking. The harshness of the cinnamon mimics the cancer stick cigarette. I think that’s what he said.

Tazzee - countdown to Pensacola Beach

July 29th, 2009
3:13 pm

Okay, my only question is: Who’s pitching & who’s catching? Yikes…

Buggery??? :lol:

Raqi

July 29th, 2009
3:17 pm

Tazzee a little on that toddler thing. Very little sugary snacks. Very little. And be careful because juice contains a lot of sugar just like sodas. Get the Mott’s for Tots. It has way less sugar than the regular stuff.

However if you want to be chasing a little one around the house at midnight trying to get him to settle down, ignore my tip.

Tazzee - countdown to Pensacola Beach

July 29th, 2009
3:29 pm

Raqi He’s a water and apple juice drinker. I’ll have to get that Motts for Tots. My nephew will keep him company, but I’m nervous around kids. I don’t even have a table for him to sit down to eat, so we’ll be going out for dinner Friday when I pick him up and hitting up a breakfast spot Saturday morning.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
3:36 pm

M’ – Yes it will impress him!

Can you go cold turkey? If you can make it 30 days you can beat it. Can you do the patch or nicotine gum or is that contraindicated with your BP issue? My dad started at 15, but had to go cold turkey when he had a stroke at 70. It was H dealing with him, but sure enough after 30 days he beat it and he was so proud! He never smoked another after that.

M'

July 29th, 2009
3:40 pm

@Raqi

I have this strange feeling that when I quit it will be cold turkey…I did not think that I could do it that way…but something says that I will…one day, I am just gona make up my mind and walk away from it…just like I started it…btw, I like cinnamon sticks…lol.

Lurky lurked

July 29th, 2009
3:43 pm

Silence means it is 2 hot in the cesspool. The concubines and master is hiding out. Lord V I know who you are liar

M'

July 29th, 2009
3:48 pm

@kimmie

No, I am not on the patch or any nicotine substitute product…it only takes 3 days to get the nicotine out of the system…the psychological and emotional ishes is another Oprah show…lol…but I honestly do feel guilty having these wonderful ppl at Station 29 making themselves available to my best interest…they were so very wonderful yesterday.

I went to the Chevron across the street…I have been having some serious headaches the last few weeks…almost a month or more (not my sinus ishes)…so my head was throbbing and I went to the station next to the Chevron to have my BP check…they were so attentive and then they became very concerned when it was so high…they immediately decided to call an ambulance to take me to the hospital b/c they did not want me to take the bus/train…I needed to come back and freshen meself up…lol…well, when I was not back in 30 minutes…they were calling as I walked back to the station…called the ambulance…they really took very good care of me and were so sincerely concerned…I think that I owe it to them to really put quitting in my best interest too…they risk their lives everyday for us…and I am taking my own one puff at a time…yes, I see the irony in that dumbness…funny, sometimes all it takes is someone to really care about our best interest, invest in it and it makes us see what we need to really commit to doing for our own selves.

mytw♥cents

July 29th, 2009
3:52 pm

LORD V methinks you need like 5♥♥ HUGS :)

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 29th, 2009
3:55 pm

funny, sometimes all it takes is someone to really care about our best interest, invest in it and it makes us see what we need to really commit to doing for our own selves.

So true. And so comforting to know that you have people around that care and will look out for you! I have the best neighbors in the world around me too and I have their backs as well.

It takes a village for everyone, not just kids!

main lurker

July 29th, 2009
3:55 pm

no times for games in “tryna” figure anything out….I live by the motto, listen, listen, listen, pay attention and listen. We have two ears and one mouth for listening twice as much as we speak.

M'

July 29th, 2009
3:59 pm

@Kimmie

yeah…I think that they call that village…COMMUNITY…uh-huh…we can not exist outside of some sort of community…it is what bonds our spiritual being to our secular identity…it gives us a substance of faith, hope and being beyond the “I”…”me”…it is an essential needs hierarchy requirement…COMMUNITY.

Lurky lurked

July 29th, 2009
4:02 pm

Flush the toliet

Leggs

July 29th, 2009
4:07 pm

@Raqi, that’s funny cuz every time I would hold my baby in my arms at that age I use to tell myself she’s looking at me saying “I sure hope you do right by me and not drop me.”

main lurker

July 29th, 2009
4:20 pm

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