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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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Sowing Wild Oats

There is a common perception about single people, especially single men, that the allure of sowing our wild oats is keeping us single. Apparently, we are too busy and satisfied, to settle down with one person. I’m sure that is the case for some single people. They are reaping the benefits of the “buffet”, dating a variety of people, experimenting, etc. Do you think that this is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Is it good to sow our wild oats? Do you even have wild oats?! I don’t think I do, and I am definitely not sowing anything, but that’s just me.

What do you think single people should be doing before they settle down?

Should single people “get it out of their systems” so that when they are married, it won’t be a problem to be commited? If you are married or have been married, did you have something you wanted to do before you settled? Did it make any difference?

118 comments Add your comment

Lane Kiffin

July 28th, 2009
2:14 pm

Oh I think ya gotta gotta tap it while ya can. Spread nasty love like a man.

I mean a tap tap tap it, till ya just caint stand it, then ya buy yoseff a piece o land.

Put a double wide up and she’ll show up and if she don’t, you been tappin a man.

Leggs

July 28th, 2009
2:17 pm

Good afternoon, everyone. Long, demanding offsite meeting.

Sowing wild oats…hmmm! Back in the day, when I got a wild hair I made sure it got “plucked” one way or another. However, I was never careless with my honey pot. As a result, I’m still careful moving forward. Sure, dating has its ups and downs. I’m finding too many want sex and not a relationship. So, as the rust continues to accumulate, I am so fine going forward with PEACE OF MIND AND A CLEAN BILL OF HEALTH! Too dangerous to sow one’s wild oats!

sad brotha

July 28th, 2009
2:22 pm

I like to have woman I never had. The spice of life. My best line to conquest white women is to pull the prejudice line on them. Works like a charm and the guilt to “date” me is in place! Sowin it like there be no tomorrow!

Tazzee - countdown to Pensacola Beach

July 28th, 2009
2:24 pm

Raqi – A lot of singles hold off doing some things until they get married. I was guilty of it myself. Things like buying a home, going on certain vacations… some have said (including me) ‘I want to experience those things with my husband.’

Not that you don’t live while married, but some think you can’t live until married.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 28th, 2009
2:26 pm

Raqi – Me too. Hope it comes to an end, I mean.

Lurky lurked

July 28th, 2009
2:29 pm

The cesspool is clear the liars are hiding

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 28th, 2009
2:31 pm

Taz – That was a good thing that came out of losing my youngest brother and others I love – not putting things off. Life is not promised to anyone, no matter how young. Do what you want to do and love doing. If you meet someone along the journey with whom to share life’s experiences with, then that’s the icing on the cake!

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage

July 28th, 2009
2:35 pm

Oh, okay Tazzee. I guess that could very well be the source of conception of the “independent woman”. Thinking about how true your statement is about waiting until married I can see why a lot women feel the independent fever after doing those things alone. Really it’s just being grown up and responsible but your statement just gave me an “aha” moment.

Mase and I do want to built a house together but for now our home is no less fulfilled than when do lay that first foundation block. There are many that we have done, are doing and want to do as a couple but some of those things we have also done alone. Neither one of us had been on a cruise before. I never really had a strong desire to do it but he wanted to do it show I shared that experience with him. I am glad that I did. I doubt though that he waited until being married to enjoy the experience. IMO it was just a timing event.

But yeah I see what you are saying.

Sassy Me...juicy fruit is NO ONE'S after thought ... :-)

July 28th, 2009
2:41 pm

Back in the day, when I got a wild hair I made sure it got “plucked” one way or another. However, I was never careless with my honey pot. As a result, I’m still careful moving forward. Sure, dating has its ups and downs. I’m finding too many want sex and not a relationship.

I cosign with that Leggs. Gotta be very careful now-a-days.

nativeson71

July 28th, 2009
2:50 pm

Is it required to comment with an ‘ebonics’ tint to my English? LOL

Lane Kiffin

July 28th, 2009
2:52 pm

THREE words!! fitty dolla threesome!

If ya gone sow some oats, you gotta gotta plow some fields.

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage

July 28th, 2009
2:56 pm

I want to take a gondola ride but not alone. The experience itself is known to be romantic so that is something that I plan to do with my hubby.

I have done a carriage ride thru down twice. Once with my friends and once with my still love interest at the time. They both were nice but you know…

Leggs

July 28th, 2009
2:57 pm

@nativesone71, not at all!

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage

July 28th, 2009
2:58 pm

Living is one thing but the term “sowing wild oats” is living without caution.

Lane Kiffin

July 28th, 2009
3:01 pm

Hey yo – Shout out to my boy Markeith Ambles down in McDonough. Markeith gone be a Vol ya’ll and sow some oats with some of these fine buck tooth hillbilly gals up hera in K-town! Heck yea we gone buck dance to the rocky top yo!

lurker

July 28th, 2009
3:06 pm

Y’all remember that song SLOW LOVE?

Life

July 28th, 2009
3:13 pm

from Little Women by Louisa May Alcott, of 1869: “Boys will be boys, young men must sow their wild oats, and women must not expect miracles”.

You live and you learn and there is a ton of knowledge, to be gained, whether good or bad in the sowing of wild oats. The sowing of wild oats can be anything from partaking in different business ventures, participating in gossip, experimenting, dating, sex. Basically anything that is considered “not of the norm” by the general consensus.

Lord Velonese

July 28th, 2009
3:24 pm

I love being single,36, spoiling myself when I want, doing what I want when I want, I can leave the country when I want, and I NEVER HAVE TO ANSWER TO ANYONE. Now why in God’s green goodness would I want to give that up? I listen to some of you whining about finding someone to settle down with and wonder why; there is a whole world out there ready to be grabbed by the reins. I know some of you probably think (like my family) oh you will change when you get older. Bzzzt Wrong! I have had more fun being a Soloist than I ever had in the dating scene. I guess I am one of those rare breeds that doesn’t need someone to feel completed, I already feel complete. I have sowed many a seed, and now I eat the fruit of my labor. (And I don’t like to share)

Kym-I am the mystery in the room

July 28th, 2009
3:29 pm

Are we still on topic? Just peeking in… you are right Tazzee living should not start when you get married or booed up..You breathe every second you should enjoy each one.

Speaking of…I am trying to figure out something to do for Turkey Day with the son, not sure what.. but I know I want to do something away from home. Exactly I want to go to the beach. I was thinking of the new theme park in the Smokies..year round indoor water park.

THE INFAMOUS DOMINICANO DK

July 28th, 2009
3:37 pm

Marriage Smarriage..

Cookie – Its not cheaper for a man to settle down..

A man can date enjoy himself and because ya’ll women are so independent these days ya’ll always wanna try and show a dude up by taking him out. You know Girl I can buy him a drink.. I love it because alot of times that no-sense works against you and I have sized ya’ll up. Not every babe is like that but in todays world the women are way more aggressive than they need to be.

As the old folks say “If I get married again I had myself”

mytw♥cents

July 28th, 2009
3:40 pm

Hola! Is sowing wild oats just another way of saying being horny? That’s what I get from it… And if that’s the case, then who’d wanna sow them all before settling down? You better save some for those settlement years if you’re looking for a lifetime of commitment with somebody.

I never understand when folks feel like they’ve gotta get the wild/freaky stuff outta their systems prior to settling down. Uhm Nooo, Save some of that for me. And I also don’t understand why some dudes try to write a chick off that won’t go thru the entire kama sutra with them during a casual relationship. Most women I know are happy to slut it up, they just wanna slut it up with a regular customer.

Oh and one last thing I don’t understand is why dudes try to survey women for what kinda tricks n treats she’s done. And then get mad if she doesn’t necessarily want do em with you. LOL You are probably setting yaself up for more failure than if you never asked if she had in the first place. Just go with do you wanna do bleep to/with/on me. :oops:

THE INFAMOUS DOMINICANO DK

July 28th, 2009
3:40 pm

Oh yeah and greetings from the Dominican where my SINGLE A$$ is fondling my new friends right now.. I love it. I F’in love it..

Leggs

July 28th, 2009
3:40 pm

@LordV ~ “I love being single,36, spoiling myself when I want, doing what I want when I want, I can leave the country when I want, and I NEVER HAVE TO ANSWER TO ANYONE.” I bet most single women here agrees with what you just said. By the same token, although we’re embracing our being single, we still want the companionship of another. When a person no longer wants the companionship of the opposite sex (or even the same sex), then a part of that person’s psyche has been permanently shut down, and that’s not a good thing!

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage

July 28th, 2009
3:41 pm

Infamous would you like to speak to the ambassador about your frustrations and concerns???

Kym-I am the mystery in the room

July 28th, 2009
3:44 pm

@Raqi I missed it when did you become the ambassador for marriage and why?

The Oracle

July 28th, 2009
3:45 pm

Wisdom comes with experience. The unfortunate high price that you pay for that experience is the fallout from the mistakes that you make along the way.

The tight rope that we walk to learn life lessons is a narrow divider between course changing and life ending. Take care to tread lightly.

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage

July 28th, 2009
3:46 pm

these days ya’ll always wanna try and show a dude up by taking him out

The funny thing about this statement here ^, there many men, starting on this site, that are forever complaining about a the women that never want to take them out. Or buy them a drink.

How many times a week do we discuss who pays…

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 28th, 2009
3:46 pm

My Two – I so agree with every word you said!

DK – If I were in the Dominican having fun, venting on this little ole blog would be the LAST thing on my mind!

THE INFAMOUS DOMINICANO DK

July 28th, 2009
3:47 pm

Raqi – Frustrations and concerns about marriage… Me..

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 28th, 2009
3:47 pm

How many times a week do we discuss who pays…

Raqi – Okay, I was thinking the same thing!

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage

July 28th, 2009
3:49 pm

LOL Infamous, you. Are you going to bring back a permanent life mate from your vacay???

THE INFAMOUS DOMINICANO DK

July 28th, 2009
3:49 pm

Kimmie I love ya’ll so I have to check in and make sure ya’ll are ok.. I know its hard to live without me.. And dont worry I will be gone in about another sec or two.

Honestly I’ve had enough vacation I’m ready to come home.. I wanna sleep. And sleep in my own bed.

THE INFAMOUS DOMINICANO DK

July 28th, 2009
3:51 pm

Raqi – I would move here before I brought a babe there because as soon as she gets there and gets Americanized.. Its over.

THE INFAMOUS DOMINICANO DK

July 28th, 2009
3:53 pm

Kimmie – Can you buy me a drink? I left my wallet in El Segundo.

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 28th, 2009
3:58 pm

DK – Naw, I’m not independant. That would be too agressive! I think Imma go the docile route. You said we try too hard, right?LOL!!

You think I could make a good mail-order bride? Or have I become too Americanized already?LMAO!!!

SexyCool - Kimmie's got me singing...

July 28th, 2009
4:00 pm

Living my life….like it’s golden…golden….

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage

July 28th, 2009
4:03 pm

Kym because I was speaking as married on marriage not being the death of life or a good life.

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage

July 28th, 2009
4:04 pm

Infamous hang around long enough to explain what exactly being “Americanized” is?

kimmie-livin my life like it's golden!

July 28th, 2009
4:04 pm

SCool – I heard it on the radio the other day & it sounded so good!

They played Let’s Get Serious, by Jermaine Jackson on Steve Harvey this morning! Have not heard that in a long time! I was LMAO!

S-E-R-I-O-U-S, bay-be let’s get serious!

Mo (aka Moeisha-)

July 28th, 2009
4:05 pm

wassup Party People

okay so whats the topic, I am too sleepy to even scroll through…..

Kym-I am the mystery in the room

July 28th, 2009
4:08 pm

@ Raqi Ohh so you are trying to bring folks over to the darkside.

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage

July 28th, 2009
4:10 pm

Mo we are talking about the Americanization of foreign women. Infamous is going to school us on how to avoid the deadly plague.

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage...I'm Walking on Sunshine

July 28th, 2009
4:12 pm

Kym it’s a whole new world. :wink:

Black Mamba AKA Princess Xiomara

July 28th, 2009
4:13 pm

Sho’ iz empty up in here…

KYM… I think we would have alot less divorce if we stop setting guidelines and expectations of when a person should be at X point in their lives. Says who? If you want a mate, find a mate, but please don’t go off looking for a mate to settle down with cause well I am 35 and its about that time. Only to wake up 5-6 years from now thinking why in the hell did I do this? Oh now I remember cause it was about that time. Folks need to follow their own instincts.” Girl I agree! I say that all the time! I think a lot of people get married and have kids because that is what “society” say we should do! And every woman who is not infected with Wedding Gown and sneakers syndrome…that doesn’t mean something is wrong. She is doing what is right for her! Now if a guy or girl wants to get their freak on…then do not get into a relationship nor get married. But be upfront with your intentions with the people you sow your oats with!

INFAMOUS…go to Santiago and say hello to my family for me! Thanks!

SexyCool - Kimmie's got me singing...

July 28th, 2009
4:13 pm

See, Kimmie – Now you got me humming “Let’s Get Serious” by Regina Bell…

Every night I want you by my side so I can hold you…Cause forever’s what it’s going to take to love you…

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage...I'm Walking on Sunshine

July 28th, 2009
4:13 pm

The consulate is going to mail some papers to Tazzee. She may have taken the numbers off of her house but they still know how to find her.

Leggs

July 28th, 2009
4:19 pm

@Raqi, I immediately thought of “A Different World” with your last post. I can see Whitley saying that exact thing to Kim.

Americanization of foreign women. I can only imagine what definitions/examples will be given. Hold on, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride!

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage...I'm Walking on Sunshine

July 28th, 2009
4:19 pm

My husband made pancakes for the boy and the grandbabe Sunday morning. He told me that I would like pancakes today if I had not convinced myself that I don’t like them. They don’t make me sick neither do they taste awfully bad, I just don’t like them.

Yes that has a meaning to the present topic.

SexyCool - Kimmie's got me singing...

July 28th, 2009
4:22 pm

Oh, wait…the song is “Do you wanna get serious?”

my bad…

Raqi...The Ambassador for Marriage...I'm Walking on Sunshine

July 28th, 2009
4:23 pm

Leggs it’s about like the term “gold digger” when used to describe a woman who actually expects a man to take care of home.

The Americanization of Foreign women is just the fear that some men have of a woman growing a backbone, having an opinion and telling him where he can shove his foolishness.