Good morning,

It was love when he wiped my nose with a kleenex when I was sick with a cold.

Although I’ve had my car washed, furniture put together, had the trash taken out, and help with painting the inside of my house, I don’t feel it was love, if anything it was a fond attraction.

It’s hard for me to distinguish whether it is love or just a deeply like or a strong attraction, and if it is love what level/kind of love is it? One guy always told me he loved me, I asked him how, he said for the person I am, how I carry myself, he didn’t love me romantically.

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The guy who wiped my nose, we got married, so I know that was love, a romanatic love, he didn’t want to share me with anyone else. The other (2) who said they loved me didn’t display the love and affection, they kept me always guessing. I’m sure there was some kind of love but moreso platonic love, a general love/care for a person.

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Grace I agree with the list you gave, most guys will do those things just out of kindness. I think for me it is when a guy takes notice and remembers. For me it is totally about the small stuff and a guy keeping his word. Words are pretty and they sound good, but the actions around them speak volumes.

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***The other (2) who said they loved me didn’t display the love and affection, they kept me always guessing.***

So true with love you should never have to guess (at least not all the time). If I am guessing something is wrong.

@dw that is so sweet. Did you tell her, or send her a message or something to let her know you were smiling ear to ear?

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Love is action. I am trying to think back on the early days and remember when I first started to realize “this man loves me”.

One of the most obvious signs was he was front and center whenever I needed him. And also in times when I did not know I needed him. I really tried not to call him too often to do “manly” things for me because you know; you just don’t want to be a nuisance. But when or if he found out I “needed” him and didn’t call he would get upset.

And another sign was when he would come by the house when he was in one of his moods or he was upset. There was nothing that he wanted me to do for him, but for some reason it seemed, he was okay just being at the house with me. And my boys. He came by a few times and just like he does sometimes now, he would be in a funk and not even eat dinner. He would sit in the den. Or sometimes he would go upstairs and lie down until he was ready to go home.

I was home sick one Saturday and he came by did my laundry, completed a honey-do list that called for him to go to a couple of different places doing my shopping. He hung out with my sons while I was upstairs asleep trying to recuperate.

Those few things to me were the signs that love was taking place. Now remembering, the one that sealed the deal was when he came to my house and took care of my son because I desperately was needed at work. Only a man that truly cares…loves a woman will put off doing what he needs/wants to do to take care of a child that is not his when he is not even married to the child’s mother. Yeah, I think the locks fell from the steel box that housed my heart on that very day.

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OMG I totally need to go back to bed. I’m sooooooooo sleepy!

DW- that was really nice.

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I prayed about it. God will confirm it for you. Try it.

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1.
Aside from the ring, the things he did in putting himself out of the way….not like being put through unnecessary changes but just willing to do what he felt as being the needful.

2.
The same minus a ring….and throw in a child. Asking if he could tell my daugther’s father (cause once he got wind of a serious thing about to happen he was stalking) if he could tell him “nevermind, I got this…her and your child”

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I think it would be helpful for someone to define love. Too many people mistake love as solely an emotion. Love mistaken as an emotion is really ‘lust’. The challenge is to consider whether love is a verb or a noun? Most men will say their love is expressed through action therefore making it a verb. However, I’m sure some will argue love as being a noun.

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Morning all –

Well, I am hoping that the “you will know” adage holds true. I have been in love before, but clearly not the type of love that has lead to marriage. But I hope when that all happens it all falls into place.

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Three Words Daily – Talk ain’t cheap.

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Lurker – Thats funny. He wanted to tell him he got you buddy’s child. Im glad you told him no cause that would have been disrespectful. Its really not his place to say anything to that man about his child. Looking after you is one thing but trying to make a real father fall back is a fecipe for wig spliting souffle. I just find it amazing how a dude can put himself in a situation and not pay attention to the whole deal. Im not saying to let the father run your home but he does deserve a level of respect because its his child just as much as it is hers.

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Good morning beautiful blog people!

Love is action and I have found with men, the little things. When a guy takes the time to notice the small things you like, you know love is taking place. Guys that don’t care….don’t notice. I knew SO was falling when whenever I was around he would willing offer to change the tv to the Food Network when I really knew he’d rather be watching something else – and there are ample other tv’s in the house for him to use. He would even try to make the kids change the channel for me when they wanted to watch their kid stuff. I never let them do it, but it was the thought that went a long way. Finally, one day I was getting out of the car & his daughter came running up to me with a gift bag and said it was from her daddy. It was the box dvd set of Martin – my favorite show of all time! That night he said he loved me for the first time.

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I know I love you when I go and take a dump with door open. I know you love me when you stand there and talk to me when I do it.

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Lmaoooooooooooo SexyCool! OMG fanny pack! I’m gonna find you a fanny pack!

LOL @ 2Cents’s fanny pack.

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DK I agree with take (9:54)….he was aggrevated (as I) because my daughter’s father was “popping” up all over the place…just spazzing out. I had to let him know though, it was my place to check him and keep things simple. Not to discount what I said about him being there for me and my child but truthfully, I think he wanted to “show out” a bit too. No sense in adding fuel to a fire. I let him know though, I handled him (daughter’s father) before he entered the scene and knew what to do….heck he got like that everytime I started dating. You know, don’t want nothing, ain’t go do nothing, then want to throw road blocks for anybody else. And to your poing of him deserving some respect, while I don’t carry respect for lazy sorry folks, everybody can be redeemed. So no, I wouldn’t let him strip him of that. Even if he wants it now he can get it but he’ll have to earn it.

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Although we are married now almost four years, love gotz to be when he will get down on his knees, put on a pair of gloves, take a screw and pick the remains of a dead road rage rodent out of my tire. Little piece by little piece.

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I know I love you when I go and take a dump with door open. I know you love me when you stand there and talk to me when I do it – while that’s all good and dandy, there are somethings I just draw the line

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when your well being begins to become a priority

Infamous let me ask you then, one man’s wife to another man, why can’t he understand why I wish he would not smoke those cigars? They are bad for him. He shows appreciation for the things that I do for him that show I love him, but those damn cigars he just does not want to part with.

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The challenge is to consider whether love is a verb or a noun?

and what does that matter, Mr. Preacher, whether its a noun or verb??

Guys, what do men do when they are in love, or falling in love?

For me, i wld say,it was when i realized i was spending a lot more time with her,social places,where ordinarily, it wld have been just me with my cousins and friends.My life was work,soccer matches,clubs and occassional out of town visits,as a bachelor.A lot of times,females wld be in and out of that world,not much time with any one in particular and none was a permanent fixture.I was a rolling stone and the moss wasnt gathering.
She changed that!
And when my female cousins started chiming in,”Tee,this one is a keeper”,it was a wrap.
As far as shes concerned, i think she was knee deep be4 i was.
The calls at my job in the mornings,the friday evening calls at work, asking me to “come home”,the dinner calls eve other day,and her sisters’ musings,”what have u done to her,ur name alawys on her lips?”
One friday, i did not call her,did not return her calls either and did not pass by her apsartment after work.I was in my own zone.She surprised my that saturday as i was chilling at my crib,alone.Hitch hiked to my place(she had no car),walked a mile to my place and muttered,”i came coz i havent heard from u since thursday”,sheepishly.

I knew this wasnt the work of melo jnr alone. .
I had caused havoc to the heart,in a way melo had never done on a lady be4!

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he will put your needs/wants ahead of his own, and do so happily

- why do women think that this takes effort…men do this all the time..but because its not some grand thing everyday you miss the every day routine stuff he does to make your life easier…thats the biggest downfall…respect the little things….everything will not be water cooler material for you and your cackling arse girlfriends

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Morning Folks!!!

I like this topic. It seems as if every other day I’m experiencing something that displays my guy’s love for me. He’s always there for me even when I try to push him away. I think it first hit me when I moved into my new house. He’d taken his son on a college tour that day but came right over to my house as soon as he got back in town (with his sons) so he could change the locks on my doors and fix my garage door opener. It’s not just that he does those types of things, but the sacrifice that goes along with it. After taking his sons home, he came right back over to find me deliriously trying to put together my hamper. It’d been a long day and, while I’d put that thing together myself plenty times before, I just could not seem to get it. I know he wanted to laugh at my crooked assembly, but he just calmly took it out of my hands and put it together in 5 minutes (I’d been messing with that thing for about 30 minutes).

Just the other day I had to interrupt his sleep twice due to car problems and whenever I apologize he gives me a soft kiss on the lips and tells me that’s what he’s supposed to do. Tuesday was one of those days when I really had to thank God for blessing me with such a wonderful man.

And honestly, I wonder if God is really trying to beat me over the head with it because I’ve had more ‘issues’ that needed his attention during our relationship than I’ve probably had in the past few years. You know those issues where I’d say to myself ‘this is one of those times when I REALLY wish I had a husband’ I’ve never been the type to proclaim that I’m an independent woman – but I know how to take care of stuff. It just seems that when ’stuff’ happens, he’s usually right there by my side displaying how much easier it is with him around.

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Lurker let me ask you a question if you don’t mind answering. Was/Is you child’s father active in her life and taking care of her as should be?

My son’s was a total azz at one time. He stopped sending his child support and stopped coming around because I didn’t want anything to do with him. After I got married my husband wanted to adopt my son being that his father had made himself ghost. Upon receiving the papers he magically reappeared and now is the best father he could have been all along.

Is the new guy why your child’s father reappeared?

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JtJ Hey Lady! I finally got a chance to watch your proposal. Congratulations!!!

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Tazze, Raqi, kimmie – Y’all have some real stand up men. It’s always lovely to read.

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