Open Mouth, Insert Foot
I’ve learned that when you are dating a young guy, sometimes they will say something…well, stupid. There’s no malicious intent or ulterior motive behind it, the guy just blurts things he really shouldn’t. I’m trying to be understanding and I’m sure I have my own “open mouth, insert foot” moments too. The interesting part of it all is that he is completely oblivious until he sees a look of unbelief on my face.
Ladies, you have to explain to men when they say something crazy to you. If you don’t, you can’t complain about it later. It’s best to address it when he says something that bothers you.
Have you ever had an embarrasing moment with someone you are dating? Did they say something or do something that embarrassed or humiliated you?
Have you ever dated someone that has absolutely no filter? I’m talking about the tactless, thoughtless type that should to take a crash course on How to Win Friends and Influence People.
Have you ever said something to someone that you wish you could take back? How did you make up and recover for it?
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396 comments Add your comment
i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)
July 15th, 2009
8:47 am
FIRST! Hot d@mn!
i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)
July 15th, 2009
9:01 am
That’s never as fun as I think it will be…. oh well…
On topic — Never dated anyone like that; I have worked with people like that, though. But I think we’ve all had moments where we wished we could stuff the words right back in our big mouths. It happens, but when it happens all the time, that’s not a good look. It’s only cute when little kids do it…
And on that note, a funny story:
A few years back, I was at Stone Mountain — I’d just finished lugging my lazy arse up the mountain & was resting & taking in the views at the top. There was a family nearby with a little boy (couldn’t have been more than 2 or 3). As we’re all standing there, this dude comes jogging by & he’s committing pretty much every fashion violation possible: short-short (and I DO mean waaaaaaay too short) jogging shorts, no shirt — flabby, wrinkly, old love handles & man-boobs giggling all over the place. It was ugly. Well, the little boy has a gander at this dude & is enthralled. This kid starts jogging behind the guy, tailing him all over the top of the mountain, pointing & yelling, “HA! HA! Look at that man!” over & over & over.
I’m pretty sure dude never left the house looking like that again.
Professor
July 15th, 2009
9:06 am
Good Morning All:
I try to go easy on my words (when I can) just in case I have to take them back. It is never fun to stick your foot in your mouth and sometimes it is even harder to recover.
@Swiss thanks for the morning laugh…great story.
Demi
July 15th, 2009
9:08 am
Wise…Demi is an a$$hole…Even I watch what I say 90% of the time. regardless of your age…one should be mindful and respectful at all times.
Demi just opened a face book using my real name…now working on my twitter’s own now
Professor
July 15th, 2009
9:13 am
Demi I have not done the whole twitter thing yet. Let me know how you like it…it took forever for me to do FB.
Demi
July 15th, 2009
9:15 am
i’m swiss…like why are some old white dudes are so quick to put their 1970’s gym short on…with tube socks…and no shirt?! Isssh, I know his fool in my office,who is still rockin the “Jeri Curl”. That ish stank!!!
Page/W8…y’all should see that fool and the ish be dripping!!
I am like, Bish you need to mop that ish up!!
Demi
July 15th, 2009
9:16 am
Professor…will do. I am trying from my phone…may take a minute, LOL
Cemeeli
July 15th, 2009
9:17 am
Swiss Was it anything like you had dreamed?
Count down is vastly making it’s way. I have my Tina skirt in the Cleaners…
i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)
July 15th, 2009
9:18 am
“like why are some old white dudes are so quick to put their 1970’s gym short on…with tube socks…and no shirt?!”
Demi, I wish I had an answer for you. All I can tell you is that some of my cousins are some weird mofos…. Sometimes I just don’t understand my own people…
Grace
July 15th, 2009
9:18 am
Good morning, I’ve never had that problem with a date/relationship, but like Swiss I too work with some folks who NEVER think before they speak.
Professor
July 15th, 2009
9:20 am
Demi/Swiss
I always think that maybe they are so into their workout that they are not concern with that outward appearance…all about heart rate. Shoot, that does not stop me from smdh.
Demi
July 15th, 2009
9:22 am
Professor…I couldn’t start my account using my cell. For whatever reasons, my pda was unable to read those weird ’special characters’. I use my yahoo account and now I have dang near 25 people to twit.
hold on…I am now trying to twit from my cell now
i'm swiss (aka Buckshot Prior)
July 15th, 2009
9:24 am
“Count down is vastly making it’s way. I have my Tina skirt in the Cleaners…”
Look out now, Cee — don’t get me in trouble on my wedding day — you know I can’t look away from a nice pair of legs…
And, yes, the clock is ticking… We had to spend all day Saturday at this engaged couples “workshop” so the catholic church will let us use their building for the wedding. (What’s the pope gonna tell me about marriage? Swiss Miss isn’t an alter boy or anything.) For part of it, they had this lady giving a presentation on “natural family planning” — and then she got on this kick about how it would be a great idea for all the couples to abstain until the wedding night. I was sitting there thinking, “is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bytch?????”
AmazonRed™ - a ray of sunshine
July 15th, 2009
9:26 am
Morning all,
Well, I know I’ve said somethings to guys that haven’t been appreciated. Just this weekend some guy interrupted my thoughts and asked me what I was thinking. I kindly said to him that it was none of his business and he got all huffy.
But for folks I actually know and care about, I try to leave the filter on. My family and I will lay it all out there. My sister told me the last time she saw me that I had huge hips. Thanks sis.
But not everyone rolls like me, so I try to stay mindful that it’s not always what you say but how you say it. In relationships, you gotta fight fair cuz even if you are forgiven, it’s often isn’t forgotten.
And yes, if a guy comes at me sideways he’s quickly shut down. You may mean well, but I’m gonna check you so it doesn’t happen again.
Cemeeli
July 15th, 2009
9:27 am
Morning…
“I have my own “open mouth, insert foot” moments too”
Yea, I regret EVER saying this one thing my guy remember from a year ago! Not anything demeaning, or disrespectful towards him or who he is. A wrong choice of words on my part. And then after it was returned to me, not in my favor i was sour about it.
Tip to the ladies: Leave your independant statements to self when talking with your old man about more eminent things of your relationship.
lovelyliz
July 15th, 2009
9:31 am
Young guys. Trust me it can happen to any guy or anybody, really. Being that I am too picky about certain things, I’ve seen this quite a bit. Perhaps it’s becasue people make assumptions about me that just don’t jive with who I am and what I tolerate.
There are certain assumptions made when around a white, middle class, military veteran, Christian woman who has lived in the South much of her life. Make thoise assumption about me and what I tolerate and am into and you would be wrong. My politics lean towards the left. I appreciate diversity. I am tolerant and pretty much a live and let live kind of person. Maybe I just put of that vibe, but the whole racial epithets and snide remarks just set me off. The best I can do it maintain my silence and roll my eyes.
As for the lack of malicious intent I am evidently really judgemental there too. I don’t like guy making fun of my love of soccer over American football. Or the ones still fighting the Civil War. Again the best I can do it maintain my silence and roll my eyes.
Professor
July 15th, 2009
9:32 am
Hey Cee!
You made it back I know the club, I meant blog stayed open late last night. I totally agree about the independent statements
Cemeeli
July 15th, 2009
9:33 am
We had to spend all day Saturday at this engaged couples “workshop” so the catholic church will let us use their building for the wedding.
Swiss Good call! I’m sure it’s a beautiful church. You’re not Catholic i presume. Swiss Miss did she choose the facility?
and then she got on this kick about how it would be a great idea for all the couples to abstain until the wedding night. I was sitting there thinking, “is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bytch?????”
Please let’s not play “Truth or Dare” when at the “engaged couples workshop”.
It’s not impossible (for some) to abatain until the wedding night. lol @ You pulling a Wayne Brady!
lovelyliz
July 15th, 2009
9:33 am
There there was the time my then roommate was having a party. One of her male friends loved my that he loved my big, fat ass. I was mortified I later explained to her her that us white women don’t take that as the compliment it was intended to be.
Demi
July 15th, 2009
9:33 am
(Sometimes I just don’t understand my own people…)
Swiss…I am right behind you on that one…My folks are just as bad, LOL!!
(I always think that maybe they are so into their workout that they are not concern with that outward appearance)
Profess…that agument will not hold up in court!! That’s about as bad as those old dudes in LaFitness, rockin underarmor…with a beer belly…trying to holla at ms. coke bottle…LOL
On twitter…I am now twittin my arse off with my cousins…They like, Dang cuz…you’re late as hell!!!
Demi
July 15th, 2009
9:36 am
Also, the messages are in real time
Tazzee - in need of some beach time
July 15th, 2009
9:40 am
Morning Folks!
I’m really good and filtering what comes out of my mouth – it’s my facial expressions that need work. My friends get on me all the time about that. My guy will do or say something and then ask me ‘what does that look mean?’
Cemeeli
July 15th, 2009
9:41 am
Professor If i could rewind the time and HUSH! I would…Before we got real serious he always told me i’d learn how not to sass him. And yea, i’ve scaled back ….
Thanks to you and Moca for helping refresh my memory on stars, and the galaxy…i WAS a lil lost. Moreso cause i was cooking and tryna watch the grill And the t.v. is on. The HDs are hypnotic…:) lol.
Professor
July 15th, 2009
9:41 am
Demi I surrender…that was my best argument…I tried.
Leggs
July 15th, 2009
9:42 am
Good morning everyone!
No doubt I had foot in mouth, hard to retrieve moments. (Keep it quiet Jamoca). However, a lot of my honesty was truthful.
Yes, indeed the blog was open late last night.
@Professor, who on here pays attention to your ears.
SexyCool - Can I borrow your EBT card?
July 15th, 2009
9:43 am
Three Words Daily – Everyday brings opportunities.
Cemeeli
July 15th, 2009
9:47 am
@SexyCool – Gurl you got me over here crackin up!!!…oh, my side hurt.
I’m tryna borrow the EBT card with you.
Professor
July 15th, 2009
9:47 am
@Tazzee I am big on the facial expressions as well…one eyebrow up one down, I wrinkle my nose, and do all sorts of things with my eyes. I try to control them but they just take over. In fact the class that I am teaching talks about gestures and faces…I hate teaching that section!
@Leggs…Stick-up
AmazonRed™ - a ray of sunshine
July 15th, 2009
9:50 am
Yes, indeed the blog was open late last night.
Wait…the y’all were blogging after working hours? Like, taking time away from your actual lives outside of work (for those who have one…). LOL
Well, okay.
Professor
July 15th, 2009
9:52 am
That EBT card is gone for all of those trying to borrow it, but I may cut a deal for a small fee.
SexyCool - Can I borrow your EBT card?
July 15th, 2009
9:52 am
I rarely suffer from Hoof in Mouth disease. I have learned to say what I mean and mean what I say. Anyone who suffers offense from my words, it is an unintended consequence, but I make no apologies.
Professor
July 15th, 2009
9:53 am
ARed, the blog help me make it through IT support or lack of support and going over some routine papers…
SexyCool - Can I borrow your EBT card?
July 15th, 2009
9:54 am
I received a text last night, while I was on the ballfield, about the bootleg blogging going on.
Interesting conversation to say the least.
Demi
July 15th, 2009
9:55 am
Professor…LOL
AmazonRed™ - a ray of sunshine
July 15th, 2009
9:55 am
ARed, the blog help me make it through IT support or lack of support and going over some routine papers…
Hey Professor, no need to explain.
Leggs
July 15th, 2009
9:58 am
Ok, Professor, so who’s Stick-up?
Anywhooo, I had a quite a few laughs last night.
@Wisey, I was informed not to send you a text stating that the blog was still open (like I would have done that).
Tazzee - in need of some beach time
July 15th, 2009
9:59 am
I wish someone would have told me the blog was open late. I was at work until 10pm…
Melo
July 15th, 2009
10:00 am
Did they say something or do something that embarrassed or humiliated you?
I do have an open mouth.But it is a very honest mouth.
If it feels right and true, i will say it,ask u the qstion or say my opinion.
Guys need to say stuff even more so you can see where these girls are,mentally.She may blush,appear embarrased etc but it dont mean they dont know.A lot of times chics play dumb,hoodwinking us into thinking they are all innocent.
So guys,when the relationship is just starting,just say it.It wont hurt.
On another note:i wished the blog had stayed a lil longer last nite.
It felt like a mini nuclear explosion.
Chics can start drama at the blink of an eye,i tell ya.
Morning folks!
Cemeeli
July 15th, 2009
10:00 am
Professor You and SexyCool don’t have any kids. Please stop hoggin’ the blessing that will take the strain away from my debt card.
I’m tryna figure out how a neighbor had EBT and drove a Lexus Coupe and stayed cleaned all the time. The kids…now let’s not get on their up keep.
‘explain that.
Mr. Mike Jones
July 15th, 2009
10:00 am
Good Morning,
I think I’m the opposite. I bite my tongue ALOT, trying to no to hurt someone elses feelings. Because I know if I get started I’m going to GO HARD and thats not a good. So I usually take the high road for better or worse.
Demi
July 15th, 2009
10:01 am
EBT cards are the junk!! Before, Demi was cutting corners and only buying Kroger nasty a$$ brand…Now, thanks to my ‘blessings’…Demi can now purchase name brand items…Thanks, EBT Gal!
Wise…delete this post please!!! LOL
Professor
July 15th, 2009
10:01 am
Ared it was not an explanation just a quick note. In fact, we had a few folks lurking (I suppose) and changing monikers I guess after hours they flip the identity thing. Hey being the chick that I am I don’t change monikers or throw out words I just blog the truth and use LOL if I am playing.
Cemeeli
July 15th, 2009
10:02 am
@ Tazzee – I thought about you too, cause i know you work late quite often. I got txt-msg. and came to the lounge.
THE INFAMOUS DK
July 15th, 2009
10:04 am
Murning.. I dont get into foot in mouth disease becasue if I say it I mean it. I am always aware and dont fall victim to the first that pops in my mind falls out my mouth..
Sidebar: I am cracking up this morning over the Failblog.. This is some funny stuff.. Failblog.org
Cemeeli
July 15th, 2009
10:05 am
there was a Stick-Up someone tryna get Professor’s diamonds. You need to pack when hanging out in the Lounge after hours.
Like the salon ladies…lock the door, and keep your strap ready! Lol
Professor
July 15th, 2009
10:06 am
Cee I do not have an EBT card I wish I did. For some reason (at least that is what I am told) that I do not grocery shop right.
Demi is the one over there with the EBT hook-up. We need to ask him so my Whole Foods and Publix bills will go down.
SexyCool - I don't even like cotton candy.
July 15th, 2009
10:06 am
Cem – If anybody knows somebody with the EBT hook-up have them get at me. And I am SO sincere…
Sassy Me...juicy fruit callin' out all fakes :-)
July 15th, 2009
10:06 am
Morning blog fam
I’m not known for mincing words but I do have tact and use it even when that other me doesn’t want to. Naturally in business settings the filter is on but with my friends and fam there’s no pretense. I will sugar coat things for children but never for adults b/c hellooo we’re grown. Usually when I make a remark that has others clutching the pearls it’s something that the masses have THOUGHT but only I had the ballz to say….or if some random person invades my thoughts or my space I let them have it and watch them recoil with that “WTF” look on their faces….shyt I surprise myself at times. Plus you guys have seen hints and glimmers of that other SASSAFRASS
SexyCool - I don't even like cotton candy.
July 15th, 2009
10:08 am
Or not…
Professor
July 15th, 2009
10:08 am
Cee I will take my “carats” off the next time I am in the lounge after hours.