Not new to this
Single people can be a creative bunch. We come up with the most unique excuses reasons not to date someone. I’m talking about the “relationship resume” that some people prefer to be long, detailed, and has proof of commitment. You say you are a good candidate? We’re going to need references!
While some prefer not to date a previously married person, others would just like someone who is not new to the relationship thing. I can admit that dating someone with no real relationship experience can be challenging.
You may have to become a virtual relationship guide and exercise a little more patience. It’s not necessarily impossible to do but I am pretty sure the inexperienced person would have to put up with something too. That’s why it’s called a relationship.
Do you think those post high school and college relationships really make a big difference in our relationship resume? What do you think is important in a person’s dating history?
What was the relationship from your past that you think helped make you a better person?
Which one do you think actually created some emotional baggage for you?
Would it bother you if you were dating someone who has never had a long-term relationship before?
I want to remind you that the Misadventures in Atlanta blog will be closed on Friday.
Happy Monday!
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451 comments Add your comment
AmazonRed™ - wearing Citi Trends and drinking Grey Goose, thanks BET!
June 29th, 2009
12:54 pm
I thought Janet was the youngest Jackson…folks keep saying Michael was Joe’s youngest.
Tazzee – I don’t know who is saying that. Michael isn’t even the youngest son.
M'
June 29th, 2009
12:56 pm
@Ared
True…but it still ain’t making my baby kick…but then again, thinking in a more open mind…maybe there is a positive side to what a person can “become” or do that is legitimate, even if they are still ghetto about it…lol…but I did not like the Paris and Nicole show either…basically they were classless money.
-W8©(thoroughbred...sleep is for the weak)
June 29th, 2009
12:58 pm
@Ared- That wouldnt make for good tv..lol
AmazonRed™ - wearing Citi Trends and drinking Grey Goose, thanks BET!
June 29th, 2009
12:58 pm
maybe there is a positive side to what a person can “become” or do that is legitimate, even if they are still ghetto about it…
-W8©(thoroughbred...sleep is for the weak)
June 29th, 2009
1:01 pm
OK LOL @Skank Robber skit with Shenanae and Wanda
Pregnant Wanda”I know this Chris Brown’s baby I can tell how it’s kicking me”
lol@Jamie Foxx after the show when Ne-Yo left his hat..”Yeah..we know Ne-Yo NEEDS his hat”…lmao
Professor
June 29th, 2009
1:02 pm
Chiming back end…
@ Tazzee I keep hearing reports that Michael was the youngest. I am still a young’un so I had to google that one.
As for Ciara I saw her in concert and her vocals were horrible. Actually I thought someone had recorded me signing in the shower…
On Mr. Joe Jackson…no comment because I don’t want him to pull that switch out on me…he look like he can make that switch do ninja moves while whipping your azz.
@W8 I enjoyed the mayor of Mississippi
I need, yes need a peach milkshake for Chick-fil-a there goes my diet.
Melo
June 29th, 2009
1:03 pm
maybe there is a positive side to what a person can “become” or do that is legitimate, even if they are still ghetto about it
u right! Ive heard that Keisha Cole mum on Ryan show and altho shes as ghetto fab as hell,shell make good entertainment, i think and a good side kick for some talk show/radio host.She gots some funny lines.
And she has to eat too,mind u.So if she aint depending on Keisha for a livilehood,thats a good thing in ma that she got her own hustle going on.
AmazonRed™ - wearing Citi Trends and drinking Grey Goose, thanks BET!
June 29th, 2009
1:03 pm
Janet is the youngest girl. Randy is the youngest boy.
Jamoca
June 29th, 2009
1:10 pm
Now, I can say that I’ve heard Tiny speak…and I have to say, really doesn’t bother me as much, especially since I’ve heard A LOT worse. And what T.I’s found in her, is worth a helluva lot more and will definitely outlast those who have been blessed tremendously in regards to outter beauty. As it has been said before, every man does not want himself and Haaallleeey Beeerrrraaayyy or Beyonce. Heyal, of all of the women T.I. could have “bawt” (bought), he’d rather have himself a “Tameka” .
…and no matter how nice looking that I may think that I am, not every man wants himself a “Jamoca” (shake) Lol…heyal, just because he likes what he sees, doesn’t mean that he’s willing to “play for keeps”…knee-grow, may just wanna play. hmph…Jamoca now handing dude a bowl of Trix cereal and a tablespoon…”knock ya’ self out”
Cee Hope that you received my message, chica.
M’ I hear you loud and clear on that…regarding some little girls ready on the mark to mimick what they see. My oldest would often come back telling me of all kinds of discussions some of her peers from school would have and questions they’d ask her. Like how does she know so much about the human reproductive system and contraceptives??? Her reply: “My mama, that’s who!” LOL…but we’ve had some heated discussions while sitting back shaking our heads at some of their aspirations to not only make it a point to NOT get pregnant at young ages and unmarried (now looking within myself), but sadly they feel like 16 or 17 is a good age for family planning??? We just shake our heads. No dreams and/or goals of college or anything beyond graduating, if that. She’s in amazement when she hears such things and she should be. However, at the same token…I am not surprised. So I continue to stay in that child’s ear, encouraging her and keeping her busy.
-W8©(thoroughbred...sleep is for the weak)
June 29th, 2009
1:13 pm
@Professor-Do Peach milkshakes taste good?
Poppa Grande
June 29th, 2009
1:16 pm
Good Afternoon all.
Hope that you all had a good weekend.
I have a quick announcement for those of you who work in midtown. Part of the parking deck for the LA Fitness that is on 5th street collapsed. I don’t know if it will affect Spring Street much but there is bound to be plenty of media around there. So, it may affect your rides home.
My law school prof had audacity to give us a pop quiz on Friday, and I have been studying ever since.
As for the BET Awards show, the wife and I both got texts about the Stanky Leg dance contest during the commercial break.
Qwest Love from the Roots posted the following after the show on his twitter (my wife showed me hers tweets) : “I wished that BET died and Michael Jackson was doing a tribute to them”.
– I agree with that sentiment 100%
Black Mamba AKA Princess Xiomara
June 29th, 2009
1:19 pm
“Professor-Do Peach milkshakes taste good?”
Giiiirrrrlll…don’t answer that…the men on this blog will have a field day!
Dan
June 29th, 2009
1:20 pm
@PG
I went to a club friday night, and for the first time in my life, heard (the song) and saw the dance. Grown men and women doing the “stanky leg”… I was in sheer amazement
kimmie-Her Royal Highness the Dutchess
June 29th, 2009
1:21 pm
“I wished that BET died and Michael Jackson was doing a tribute to them”.
- I agree with that sentiment 100%
Count me amongst that 100, Poppa. Each year it just gets more & more embarrassing. Not improving with age at all. And this year the spotlight was on them because of MJ. SMH
M'
June 29th, 2009
1:22 pm
@Jamoca
Keep up the good work…most young ppl stray from goals, discipline and good sense decision making because they do not have someone in there ear to speak to them.
SexyCool - O Most Fabulous One
June 29th, 2009
1:24 pm
I don’t know, Kimmie. I doubt Bubba or Farmington or Habeeb or Boris or Pakteet, who have never tuned in to BET, would be watching just because MJ died.
Jamoca
June 29th, 2009
1:24 pm
Grown men and women doing the “stanky leg”… I was in sheer amazement
…then I take it you haven’t witnessed folks displaying their renditions of “The Booty-Do”…song & dance as well. deep n’ heavy sigh
Beautiful
June 29th, 2009
1:24 pm
if my lawn guy pull one more flower . . . every time he come and cut the grass, i find flowers missing!!!
wait till i see his azz!
*rant over*
Poppa Grande
June 29th, 2009
1:25 pm
Kimmie
pssst….just between you and I
Chrisette Michele and Maxwell will be in Savannah, GA on July 28. Tix are on sale. My wife will still be in class so we may not be able to go. But, it sounds like a good date getaway if you can.
-W8©(thoroughbred...sleep is for the weak)
June 29th, 2009
1:28 pm
@Professor/Staceye- I am being serious I see them at Chic-Fil-a but i just wondered how they taste before i order one.
kimmie-Her Royal Highness the Dutchess
June 29th, 2009
1:28 pm
SCool – All the major & local networks had clips from it this morning. That’s what I’m talking about Bubba & nem probably don’t even know what BET is!LOL!!
Poppa – Thanks, sounds like a plan!!
AmazonRed™ - wearing Citi Trends and drinking Grey Goose, thanks BET!
June 29th, 2009
1:30 pm
the wife and I both got texts about the Stanky Leg dance contest during the commercial break
PG – I’ll do the stanky leg in public…for a good laugh.
SexyCool - O Most Fabulous One
June 29th, 2009
1:31 pm
Oh, hell, if I’m out dancing and the song comes on, I’m gone put my best stanky leg out there (or at least try cause I really don’t know how to do it).
I’m grown, but who said being grown meant not having fun? Loosen up people.
Beautiful
June 29th, 2009
1:31 pm
@Dan
it only looks cute when the youngins do it! i seen two sistas on youtube and they were good. got favorable comments too.
the booty-do? how that go? googling . .
Cemeeli
June 29th, 2009
1:32 pm
Hey Jamoca.
Peach Milkshakes are good!
PoppaG Pop Quiz on a Friday? I woulda pleaded that i was to emotional over Mike’s death to test…lol j/k.
Hey i need some fresh mushrooms out of your garden for my kabobs i plan on making in the WONDERFUL weather tonight.
It feels great outside!
AmazonRed™ - wearing Citi Trends and drinking Grey Goose, thanks BET!
June 29th, 2009
1:32 pm
SCool – All the major & local networks had clips from it this morning. That’s what I’m talking about Bubba & nem probably don’t even know what BET is!LOL!!
Yeah, I know CNN covered it this year. I’m thinking that’s a first. But I haven’t watched the award show in years (of any sort really), so I don’t know.
Melo
June 29th, 2009
1:33 pm
NOW,lemme say i saw the part 1 of that Jaron and Jackie Proposal.
Was that chick happy or what,daaaaamn.She was really flustered and her leggs were like jelly.She in loooooooooove!!!!
She phine too..those long legs,WOW!!!
I know that man got a very nice and happy weekend and hope it remains the same for eternity.
Congrats u 2 lovebirds!!
-W8©(thoroughbred...sleep is for the weak)
June 29th, 2009
1:33 pm
@Ce- Thanks
Rell -
June 29th, 2009
1:34 pm
Grown men and women doing the “stanky leg”… I was in sheer amazement
and that not the gieghiest dance..this is
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=abr7o-Sphqs
this dance is only for females…lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjwL4JggfnU&feature=related
Poppa Grande
June 29th, 2009
1:34 pm
On more thing
Yeah, Tiny was ghetto. But that is her.
Melo, She had money way before TI.
She wrote TLC hit “No Scrubs”. That song was enormously successful. TI was just trying to get into the game back then.
AmazonRed™ - wearing Citi Trends and drinking Grey Goose, thanks BET!
June 29th, 2009
1:35 pm
I’m grown, but who said being grown meant not having fun? Loosen up people.
Two of my girlfriends are planning weddings and they have ruled out all line dancing like the Cupid Shuffle and the electric slide. Them heffas are usually out there as soon as the song comes on! And one loves making her leg stanky!
Folks line dance at weddings. Heck, look at The Best Man! Why are they tryin to be all uptight now.
Beautiful
June 29th, 2009
1:36 pm
BEING SINGLE
The Art of Contentment. For most of us, being single will be more of a phase than a final destination. This is the best place to practice the art of contentment. Someday, I’m sure most of us will fall in love and get married. But the thing is, love will always be tested. Someone more handsome, beautiful, more charming, richer, funnier, sweeter would come along. If you have not practiced the art of contentment as a single person, chances are you would be tempted to want that and not cherish your chosen one. Practicing the Art of Contentment as a single person means that you take what life gives you, good or bad, you’re willing to see it through. It means you don’t walk away everytime things get tough because it builds in you patience, perseverance, understanding and a hundred different virtues that people in a hurry will never have. Being single means you would find how it feels to be alone thus, allowing you to cherish every moment you spend with your chosen one. The art of contentment means you wouldn’t mind if life had to make you wait for so long to find the love of your life, because you know that the waiting would only make the finding much sweeter.
Being single is a time of your life when you can get to know yourself better. You can pursue different interest and passions without having to ask another person’s approval. It is a phase when you can keep focus on other things, discover your potentials and talents, and see yourself become more than what you expect to be. Allow yourself to surprise you. Stop wasting precious energy trying to figure out why you’re still romantically unattached. It’s all in the mind. Take the time to go see your friends, spend time with your family, do charity work and you will realize that you are not, and never for one moment, was alone. Try to get to know yourself first before you try to get to know other people. To be truly loved means to be known and accepted for who you are. How do you expect other people to know you and to love you, when you don’t know who and what you really are?
Sometimes the dilemmas we face are not between what is absolutely bad and absolutely good. Sometimes, it’s between good and best. Treat this stage of your life as a phase to evaluate who is good for you and who is best for you. Sometimes, you won’t hear music, or feel magic to know who’s best for you. The heart just knows and it doesn’t need any romantically charged scenario to decide on the matter. Trust in your heart, and trust that time will eventually lead you to, not to the perfect partner, but to the most suitable partner for you. Being single is a phase of life that we need to be thankful for, because being single means our hearts have yet to choose the best one for us. Take your time, the world will wait. Being married doesn’t guarantee that it will make your life happy. It doesn’t guarantee anything at all. Sometimes, it only brings two miserable people together only to make their life even more miserable. Without the right intention, the emotional maturity, financial security and of course, unwavering love, you’re better off unattached.
Living Life. Don’t put your life on hold for Mr. and Mrs. Right, but don’t let it waste away with Mr.or Mrs. Wrong. Life is about things that you do and happen to you everyday. It’s not about the things that could have happened but never did, or things that you think would happen in the future. Live life now. Live it to the fullest and stop beating yourself up, trying to be perfect on a Saturday night date. Allow life to surprise you with it’s most wonderful blessings.
lurker
June 29th, 2009
1:36 pm
I ain’t tryna be funny but……..If the lady has never been married, that raises a red flag for me, i.e., has she been “high maintenance”, is she a “biotch” and every man that has been involved with ran. Does she have children without a father in their life? Why?
If the lady has been married multiple times, that raises a red flag. Does she throw in the towel when the “rains come”? Do the men leave her as soon as they find out what she is like on a daily basis? Does she make remarkably poor choices of men? What is she really looking for? Why?
Does she NOT have children? Is this choice or chance? Does this mean she cannot accept mine and will want me to detach from my own? Why?
Is she divorced or widowed? Ex husbands have a nasty habit of ccoming back into a woman’s life sometimes and screwing things up. I haven’t had much of a problem with dead ex-husbands. What is the story and is she really over the man that hurt her so much?
You’re out there dating in the 40+ range as well (as the lady)…and still…soooo why the laundry list of what to watch out for? Maybe it’s me and maybe it’s Monday but such a standard when you’re doing the same thing as she is and would she not be inclined to look through the same window back at you with the same questions. Heck it ain’t like it’s a fresh start in life. Yeah, I could see some of those questions if everyone is at the starting gate but by the time you’re 40+, you’re still asking all the questions…while still dating yourself? I guess I just don’t get it.
Not tryna be nasty, but just wondering sometimes at the things people think and say
back to work
Poppa Grande
June 29th, 2009
1:36 pm
Cee
I woulda pleaded that i was to emotional over Mike’s death to test…lol j/k.
Word is that is why he did it. Many paid attention in class on Thursday. The pop quiz covered Thursday (the day that MJ died) material.
Dan
June 29th, 2009
1:37 pm
@Jamo
Yeah. Saw that too
But I also saw a young lady do the beginning of the Thriller routine…I only saw the beginning because I went to go get my cousin ‘nem….she was crisp wit it too!
Jamoca
June 29th, 2009
1:38 pm
M’ most young ppl stray from goals, discipline and good sense decision making because they do not have someone in there ear to speak to them. <— I was one of them myself and I do not hesitate to remind her of that as well. Prevalent, but still inexcusable…but also in the same breath, one cannot pretend to be oblivious to the fact that it IS/WAS part of the equation…so we must factor that in to get the big picture. But I will admit, one of the hardest things for me to adjust to: her entering adulthood and knowing she’s been taught well, but also being realistic enough to know she’s going to make some mistakes…and there won’t be a thang I can do to stop her. Sigh However, I’m constantly repeating “Treas’…you always have a choice…you make not like your options, but doggone’it, you have them. So pick wisely.” And a lot of times, the best decision is the hardest to make…such is life.
Melo
June 29th, 2009
1:38 pm
Melo, She had money way before TI
OH really??
So either, she just real about her ghetto ish or that her money cant seem to polish and finese her ghetto ish at all.
Impervious???
lurker
June 29th, 2009
1:41 pm
The BET Awards just oozed with “ghetto-ism”…seriously….IMO
Rell -
June 29th, 2009
1:41 pm
your thoughs on this…it will be the topic soon…in the state senate
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l0PCQYalZU8&feature=related
Dan
June 29th, 2009
1:41 pm
@SC
There’s having fun, and having drunk fun….
I was in the spot where the latter dominated the scene. But the “thriller chick” set the whole flo off!
Just “to herself” and that yac, that she didn’t cure
Black Mamba AKA Princess Xiomara
June 29th, 2009
1:42 pm
POPPA….Tiny did not write No Scrubs…Candi did.
Cemeeli
June 29th, 2009
1:42 pm
My 10 year old stayed over to his 13 yearold buddy lastnight. And before i could leave him for the 2nd time in his big-boy childhood at a sleepover.
1) His buddy told him that Alicia Keys was his “baby”.
2) He just called to tell me while we were traveling I-20 the reason we saw 6-8 police cars is because some dude jump off the bridge lasnight.
Slow down growing up!!! Geesh!
Leggs (Karyn)
June 29th, 2009
1:43 pm
@Beautiful, have you lost your mind?????
-W8©(thoroughbred...sleep is for the weak)
June 29th, 2009
1:43 pm
@Rell if you click on your first youtube link and go to the right and watch the “Ride it like a soldier” Video…mmm mmm mm than you for that..lol
Now I love to dance but I am not doing any sort of booty poppin, rolling my neck or dropping it like it’s hot..**Unless I am stripping for my lady in the confines of our home****lmao
Poppa Grande
June 29th, 2009
1:43 pm
Correction
Many paid attention in class on Thursday.
Not many paid attention in class on Thursday.
Dan
June 29th, 2009
1:43 pm
@PG/Melo
Tip and Tiny have been dating off and on for the better part of 10 years. When she was writing and working in Xscape and he was still working with Usher and Kast
Leggs (Karyn)
June 29th, 2009
1:44 pm
@Melo, “So either, she just real about her ghetto ish or that her money cant seem to polish and finese her ghetto ish at all.”
BOTH!
Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)
June 29th, 2009
1:45 pm
@abc and Melo
Sorry, had to go put out a few “fires”.
Melo re: jumping their ex’s bones….uhhhh, yeah I know (not me though, not a price I want to pay).
abc re: ghosts. True, it is amazing how death does tend to make them forget the less desirable qualities their ex had. Big shoes to try to fill when the dead guy was “so perfect”.
Now I am getting depressed, LOL.
Poppa Grande
June 29th, 2009
1:45 pm
Staceye
Kandi Burruss (who is the new Housewife on Atlanta) and Tameka Cottle (Tiny) along with another wrote that song.
SexyCool - O Most Fabulous One
June 29th, 2009
1:47 pm
Tiny obviously likes herself and sees no reason to change at all. And one thing I always say, “Be confident about your ish.” Rock on! lol