You Bring ME Joy
If I were to write a single woman’s manifesto, I would declare that every moment of joy, pleasure, and sheer happiness should be savored. One of the (many) things I admire about men is that they are able to enjoy things without feeling guilty.
If it makes them feel good or brings them pleasure, there is little anyone can do to make them feel bad about it. Perhaps it’s part of that double standard of society that exists for men and women, but men seem to get to indulge more. They are hard-wired to have no anxiety or guilt about their indulgences.
Now, I am not complaining here. I love being a woman! I just think women can and should find more things that brings them joy, and make no apologies for it. Do you think that men get to indulge more than women? Why do you think women feel so much guilt about indulging themselves ?
What brings you joy in your life? What are you “guilty pleasures”? You know the random, quirky things on your life that make you immensely happy? It should be safe to share them here and no judgment! We are all different and unique for a reason. It would be a boring, dull world if we were all the same.
Happy Friday!
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491 comments Add your comment
Turd Furgeson
June 5th, 2009
8:26 am
I guess we men have more joy/happiness because we are secure with ourselves and who we are or are not. Has much to do with ones level of self-esteem or lack thereof. Also women are much more the enablers and are for more co-dependent than men.
Lioness-
June 5th, 2009
8:40 am
Good Morning All
So shocked by Turd’s comment that I TOTALLY lost my train of thought. BRB
Jumbo Richard
June 5th, 2009
8:58 am
Wurd to the Turd!!
NY2GA
June 5th, 2009
8:59 am
Hey Wise and blog fam, how is everyone. Haven’t been on in a while, but I still love this site.
Ok, I gotta agree with Lioness – Turd, dude you got it all wrong. I think women are doing more of those things that bring them joy, guilty pleasure or not. Hit some vacation spots, visit a Jazz spot or any other kind of entertainment venue and you will see lot’s of women out and enjoying themselves. Women are more liberated than ever and are taking full advantage of their successes. More women have houses, careers and cars than the guys.
I applaud my sisters. Like Yesterday’s post said, I am glad it’s Summer!!!
MissQC
June 5th, 2009
9:02 am
MORNING BLOGGERS
TGIF!!!!! What brings me JOY is my Mom being happy along with me being able to supply her with what ever she needs…I’m so blessed to be able to provide for her & take care of her…That really brings me JOY..I LOVE YOU MOMMY!!! Have a blessed day/weekend bloggers…..GO LAKERS, GO LAKERS, GOOOOOOOOOOO LAKERS!!!!! SMOOCHES 
http://www.blackthen.com
Cemeeli
June 5th, 2009
9:05 am
Hello –
What are your “guilty pleasures”? #1 Fried fish, and grits!
I don’t feeling wrong for having any but the others….
#2.Cold Stone ice-cream or Hagen Daz,
#3. Shopping for expensive shoes and handbags way too much,
#4. Cartoons (Star Wars Clone Wars, The Penguins of Madagascar), & watching The Deadliest Catch.
#5. Coloring books and crossword puzzles…
…and last, but not least – Body paint.
Happy Friday!
AmazonRed™ - Lakers baby! - 1 down, 3 to go!
June 5th, 2009
9:11 am
Happy Friday all! The Lakers won, my boss is out today and it’s the weekend! Whoo hoo!
Um yeah, I didn’t get the memo that women were to feel guilty about their indulgences. It’s my money right? Though I believe in everything in moderation anyway, that way you can still pretty much do what you want no matter if you are 15 or 50.
Never one to be into purses, shoes, make-up and all that other stuff, I guess my biggest indulgence is traveling. Most often it’s just to spend time with the people important to me, but I also love spending time on sandy white beaches and crystal clear water on some island!
Lioness- Craving Someone Special
June 5th, 2009
9:13 am
Cee- GIRL.. I want my body painted! Was thinking about that yesterday
What brings me joy?
My health, my drive, Being alive, being blessed, being loved & adored, making people laugh, being a friend, being a girlfriend, being my mother’s daughter, & most of all, being myself
Cemeeli
June 5th, 2009
9:16 am
Lioness – Ditto! I’ve used body paint before in high school! It’s fuuuuuunnn…..
What brings you joy in your life? God’s love, children, and most of all – fried fish and cheese grits!!!
PSA – Pop corn crew – Publix has PopSecret on sale for buy one, get on free.
Lioness- Craving Someone Special
June 5th, 2009
9:20 am
Ared- I don’t even KNOW how to put on makeup.. Must admit, I LOVE shoes & bags but shoes have my heart a little more..
Lioness- Craving Someone Special
June 5th, 2009
9:22 am
I forgot to add that being blessed is a joy to me.
-W8©(Ego)
June 5th, 2009
9:25 am
Men make men decisions and are ready to deal with the consequences of our actions more readily than women are. Women tend to over-think stuff before and after sometimes even during. Men don’t need validation, most women do.
Random Quirky things that make me happy:
I will eat a whole jar of Smucker’s Goober in one setting with a table spoon.
I find joy in being naked at home all of the time, I will even go in the backyard that way(I have a tall privacy fence)
I like to drive in the country during the wee hours of the morning going over 100mph with the lights off.
Cemeeli
June 5th, 2009
9:27 am
Oh Lioness The Ga. Aquarium airbrush team painted a whale shark leaping out of some waves, going up my arm with glitter, and ver neat tropical colors. Do you know they took me away from my post (i was a touch pool anouncer that day) and put me right next to the airbrush kiosk as a prop! All the colors showed up so nice and pretty more than half of the guest that paid to get airbrush wanted the whale shark i wore.
I still have a picture of it, in my phone.
Mamibo
June 5th, 2009
9:29 am
My Westie! He’s such a pleasure. And great knitting materials.
AmazonRed™ - Lakers baby! - 1 down, 3 to go!
June 5th, 2009
9:31 am
Ared- I don’t even KNOW how to put on makeup.. Must admit, I LOVE shoes & bags but shoes have my heart a little more..
Lioness – I do love dresses – sundresses, freak em dresses, f*ck em girl dresses, etc. I buy a lot of them, but I rationalize it by always getting them on sale or at places like Ross.
I’m starting to like buying shoes more. I used to have a “guys mentality” with the whole “you only have two feet.”
Still not into handbags.
Cemeeli
June 5th, 2009
9:31 am
I like to drive in the country during the wee hours of the morning going over 100mph with the lights off.
Auh, Uncle Frank – You need to represent those who fall under your profession!
Sassy Me....I talk like this 'cause I can back it up :-)
June 5th, 2009
9:35 am
HAPPY FRIDAY BLOG FAMILEEEEEEEEEE
What brings you joy in your life? What are your “guilty pleasures”? You know the random, quirky things on your life that make you immensely happy?
I’m not very hard to satisfy and little things in life make me happy…sometimes just being with friends and fam or chilling at home with a glass of smooth cognac and Miles Davis in the background. As a matter of fact with the weather the way it is I might do that tonight. Sometimes I like to walk outside just after it’s rained and getting my feet wet.
hehehehe…….
First off let me cosign and say that as a woman I wasn’t aware that I was supposed to feel bad b/c of indulging myself at MY whim….CDC pays me quite well so I can do that. Now my “guilty pleasures” are shoes(fierce pumps and boots), Coach purses, Chanel jewelry(wearing some now),Salmon and grits, and this Thai restaurant called Top Spice. Some of my other guilty pleasures are private
THE INFAMOUS DK
June 5th, 2009
9:38 am
Morning.. Men are Logical and Women are emotional.. They let their emotions play into situations more so than a man does. A Man weighs his pros and cons and if the pros win then he goes in that direction. If the cons win he goes in that direction totally opposite the pros. Its that simple, nothing more nothing less. If he has weighed his options and things look better the other way he goes and learns to live with the regret and not get lost in the “was this the right decision” quicksand. Men also dont give a hoot what others think about our decisions because once our minds are made up we go hard, thats why ya’ll get the four o’clock in the morning “I need you phone calls”. No matter how embarrasing it is or how stupid we look.
-W8©(Ego)
June 5th, 2009
9:39 am
Hmm things that bring me constant joy:
My Daughter and my Son, no matter what is thrown at me..all I have to do is look at the screen saver on my phone with the both of them in it and all is well. I really enjoy being a dad. I enjoy life, I am lucky and fortunate to be alive, I love everyday…I just have to get deeper into my personal relationship with the Lord and then I will be set. I find joy that I have a two good friends who have stuck with me my whole life and are not afraid to tell me what I dont want to hear and have my back no matter what I do or may get into..
Leggs
June 5th, 2009
9:42 am
OMG, Turd opened up the blog w/o being condescending. Good for you!
Good morning, everyone.
What brings me joy the most, seriously, is being a parent. Raising my daughter with character, morals, manners, self-esteem, etc. My other joy is, believe it or not, is feeding people and helping out where my help is needed. That brings me joy.
Lioness- My Mom Is Lecturing Me As I type
June 5th, 2009
9:42 am
Cee- I was talking about someone painting my body & vice versa
Ared- My obsession with shoe comes from my mom..
-W8©(Ego)
June 5th, 2009
9:43 am
@DK-9:38..goodstuff
@Ce- My division is not the face, we are the behind the scenes that you don’t want a part of..swift,brutal,deadly..no excuses
Professor
June 5th, 2009
9:48 am
Happy Friday,
At this point in my life I do not feel guilty when I indulge, and if it is something I feel bad about I usually think about it and see what happens…so here is my list:
1. Ice cream
2. Shoes (sandals and boots)
3. MAC
4. I love my minks
5. I do like to speed, W8 I never tried doing that with the lights off.
6. Staying at home and finding peace within while listening to Miles Davis
7. Cartoons and 106&Park
8. Spoiling my niece and nephews
9. Traveling
10. Ahh the spa I just love taking a Friday off and going to the spa for a 90-minute massage and a 60-minute pedicure at Spa Sydell, afterwards I treat myself to a nice lunch. After lunch I go to Swoozies for some nice stationary and other little things that I like.
***While typing this list I just realized that I feel a tug somewhere when I think about getting customized floor mats for my car. I don’t know what that is about so I have yet to buy the floor mats…I hope the tugging goes away.”
Cemeeli
June 5th, 2009
9:50 am
Men also dont give a hoot what others think about our decisions because once our minds are made up we go hard, thats why ya’ll get the four o’clock in the morning “I need you phone calls”.
Infamous – This is per individual, not gender. I’ve (female) have said the silliest, foolishness to my folks that know me, and at the same time while not giving a hoot what they were thinking or how I sound like I was on that stuff. They knew by the time I finish ranting, reasoning/logical, and problem solving skills take over.
Lioness- My Mom Is Lecturing Me As I type
June 5th, 2009
9:50 am
Prof- Where do you wear minks @? My mom has hers custom made but she is in NY
Sassy Me....I talk like this 'cause I can back it up :-)
June 5th, 2009
9:51 am
HAPPY FRIDAY BLOG FAMILEEEEEEEEEEEEE
What brings you joy in your life? What are you “guilty pleasures”? You know the random, quirky things on your life that make you immensely happy?
I’m not hard to please so little things make me happy. Things like being with friends and fam or just chillin’ at home with some smooth cognac and Miles Davis playing in the background (with the weather the way it is I might do that tonight). Sometimes after it’s rained I like to walk outside and get my feet wet.
First off let me cosign and say that I wasn’t aware women are supposed to feel guilty about indulging themselves cause I the CDC pays me quite well so why not. Of course in moderation but why not? Anyhoo, some of my “guilty pleasures” include fierce shoes,pumps and boots, Chanel jewelry(wearing some now), Coach purses, salmon and grits, and this Thai restaurant in North Druid Hills called Top Spice(when I eat there I do my “happy dance” cause the food is sooo good). I can’t tell y’all the rest….it’s too early
Cemeeli
June 5th, 2009
9:51 am
Lioness – I know girl.
Lioness- Little Upset
June 5th, 2009
9:52 am
Not all women are overly emotional.. I’ve been told that I can be a cold mfer.. To each its own..
-W8©(Ego)
June 5th, 2009
9:52 am
Listen to the Words:
“..Cuz whenever I’m in your midst there is no stress..”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PiGFDg6X2kQ
-W8©(Ego)
June 5th, 2009
9:56 am
@Professor- Because we both drive corvettes and if we dont speed that would be un-American(only difference is I dont get tickets)..lol you need to get some floor mats..and I promised that I wouldn’t say the other thing anymore concerning your car but you know what it is..tis a shame….I have two minks that I love 3/4 length….I make them look good!!
itamazesme
June 5th, 2009
9:56 am
I know as a divorced mother of one I HAD (key word) a tendency to feel guilty about doing the things that bring me joy because i was so focused on doing any and everything for my daughter.
After being diagnosed with cancer in November of last year – I decided to do any and everything that brings me pleasure, to speak my mind freely and that it is okay to be me and be happy being me.
My motto now is – Never wait for someone to try and put an expiration date on your life to start living it!!!
Cemeeli
June 5th, 2009
9:59 am
Professor – Meet me at Swoozie’s…lol. I too, have a stationary fetish. But i’ve gotten better, since that dream….:lol:
Sassy Me....I talk like this 'cause I can back it up :-)
June 5th, 2009
10:00 am
HAPPY FRIDAY BLOG FAM
What brings you joy in your life? What are you “guilty pleasures”? You know the random, quirky things on your life that make you immensely happy?
I’m not hard to please so little things like just being with friends and fam make me happy…or just chillin’ at home with some smooth cognac and Miles Davis playing in the background. Sometimes after it rains I like to walk outside and get my feet wet.
Guilty pleasures for me include fierce shoes,boots and pumps…Chanel jewelry, Coach purses and some other things I can’t mention ’cause it’s too early
side note: never knew women were supposed to feel guilty about indulging themselves…but if YOU’RE the one doing it then why feel guilt….moderation is KEY.
Mo (aka Moeisha)
June 5th, 2009
10:01 am
TGIF! Morning All!
I love being with my family for gatherings (we celebrate ERR’THANG, cookout more than anybody I know) and I love reading books with my son.
As for guilty pleasures:
Lolita Martini Glasses – trying to collect damn near most of them
MAC – love their lip glass
Cartoons – Smurfs, Snorks, Superfriends, Boondocks, Family Guy, SnagglePuss (my favorite character)….you get the point
Shopping for Tweety Bird or Tigger stuff of any kind
Cinnabons – damn those things are the devil but soo good
Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)
June 5th, 2009
10:03 am
Tough topic.
Personally, I am always amazed at both male and female capacity for self-delusion when “justifying” their behavior. I do think that women can/do tend to question themselves more. Not much more to say (for a change
.
AmazonRed™ - Lakers baby! - 1 down, 3 to go!
June 5th, 2009
10:04 am
I know as a divorced mother of one I HAD (key word) a tendency to feel guilty about doing the things that bring me joy because i was so focused on doing any and everything for my daughter.
Oh yeah…I can definitely see that now from the mother angle. Especially if there is not a lot of time nor a lot of money.
One thing I love about my mom is she encouraged me to LIVE. That’s why I was never chained to the house doing chores and being a little mother. She wanted me to enjoy my childhood and to also enjoy the single season while I’m in it. I’ll have the rest of my life to devote to my husband and kids when I do have them.
Sassy Me....I talk like this 'cause I can back it up :-)
June 5th, 2009
10:05 am
I do love dresses – sundresses, freak em dresses, f*ck em girl dresses, etc. I buy a lot of them, but I rationalize it by always getting them on sale or at places like Ross.
Loiness and AmRed I kill ‘em ever so softly with dresses. Got two cute f*ck ‘em dresses last week that I can’t wait to wear tomorrow night. Big ting’s a gwan fi real, seen
Randyt (aka Been there, Done that, Got a Closet FULL of t-shirts)
June 5th, 2009
10:07 am
“Guilty Pleasure” … I guess I am one of the above mentioned males that do not have a lot of guilt…unless maybe when I channel surf and see all of the stories about Ron and Kate, and find myself thinking more about how I would like to jump her bones than the status of their marriage. Actually if I admit that, I must not have much guilt about that either.
Cemeeli
June 5th, 2009
10:08 am
Mo -You are so cute, reading to your son. Cain’t wait to see that list say “When my lil guy read’s to me”…girl you are cute. Snaggle Puss!
What about guilty pleasure of trying on the band dance outfit fromm school. That custom is going to do us some good soon, shawty.
FEE
June 5th, 2009
10:08 am
WHAT BRINGS ME JOY IS A BAG OF LAYS CHIPS>>>> but for real encouraging others and helping them to realize their potential in life…
FEE
June 5th, 2009
10:09 am
OOH OOOH OOH and a nice pair of sandals, to show my painted toe’s… (FEE IS SINGING LEGGS SONG FROM YESTERDAY>>. I FEEL PRETTY>.. LOL
AmazonRed™ - Lakers baby! - 1 down, 3 to go!
June 5th, 2009
10:12 am
Oooh…work it Sassy!!!
FEE
June 5th, 2009
10:13 am
sitting in the $1 massage chair at cumberland watching all the peeps go by and cracking the heck up….
FEE
June 5th, 2009
10:14 am
talking crazy with my daughters and them hearing them say oooh Mommie you crazy, funny, nasty.. whatever, they know I am down to earth…
Grace
June 5th, 2009
10:15 am
Knowing and believing that my Father Creator loves me gives me great joy, my family, my friends and doing good to/for others brings me joy and enjoying a good night’s sleep. Eating the whole king size snickers in one setting is one of my guilty pleasures.
“the four o’clock in the morning “I need you phone calls” will kill my joy disturbing my sleep! @ strong>DK
Lioness- Little Upset
June 5th, 2009
10:16 am
Sassy- I LOVE dresses as well but it seems like they make them so sheer nowadays.. Just bought some pasties to be politically correct.. LOL! I think that type of stuff draws more attention than seeing a nipple..
Staceye AKA Black Mamba
June 5th, 2009
10:17 am
“One of the (many) things I admire about men is that they are able to enjoy things without feeling guilty.” I guess that is why it is so easy for them to sleep with anything born female with a friggin’ pulse with no regard to the woman they are supposed to love!
So let’s see…my joys….are singing, belly dancing, acting, traveling and shopping oh and watching cartoons. My guilty pleasure is Chocoloate…lots and lots of it…especially while in front of my TV. I guess shopping is my guilty pleasure as well. I guess because my life is so full already it is why I do not feel lonely. I get asked that question a lot….why are you still single? I guess if I felt a void in my life I would be looking to fill it with a guy. And at one time I think I did that and all it got me was hurt! So when I comepletely put myself first and do all the things I love to do….I realize my life is fine just the way it is.
CEMEELI…girl I love Body paint too! I have doen photo shoots in it. I love the glow in the dark one.
LIONESS & ARED..I am a product junkie. I am always buying make up. But the funny thing is my usual daily make up is Liquid eyeliner, mascara & lip gloss. All the Mac eyeshadows, etc I buy only get used when I perform or go out. But I get told I look better with just my daily. Go figure. When I moved I realized just how many wigs & hair pieces I had! LOL I have to be able to change my look in a short span of time so I find myself with a crap load of hair. It’s pretty bad! It’s unbe-weave-able!
ARED…girl I got a crap load of dresses to. I now have an obsession with Ross for the Summer Dresses. GIRL…I got lots of them because they were like $25 and below!
LEGGS….take pride…you are doing a great job wiht Lil Leggs. She rocks!
PROFESSOR..I had Minks too…until I left NY….I sold them all except one. I have been here 5 years I may have worn it 3 times.
I have 2 closets filled with shoes. Pageantgirl helped me move and she was laughing at me when she saw all my clothes and shoes. I’m a addict! 
Lioness- Little Upset
June 5th, 2009
10:19 am
Grace-“the four o’clock in the morning “I need you phone calls” will kill my joy disturbing my sleep! LMAO!!
Perfect time to throw on one of those dresses..
It actually depends on what they need you for.. Come pick them up cause they are drunk for the 80th time that week.. I would be pissed but still do it..
NOW, if I was required to relieve some stress.. Then that is always welcomed
It is I
June 5th, 2009
10:19 am
Greeting’s Brother “J” a hem “W8″ YOYOOOO!
My wife brings me joy. I have known my wifes ince high school, but I didn’ t know I loved her till we were adults.
Mo (aka Moeisha)
June 5th, 2009
10:20 am
Cemeeli – girl I still have majorette boots and uniform, complete with tassels on the boots and the sequined head band!! LMAO!! WOW