Relationship A la Carte
Good Morning everyone! Today’s post is courtesy of our fabulous Raqi. If you are new to the MIA blog, Raqi is a married woman with a bambino on the way. Whenever she comments on relationships I perk up and take notes. She always provides insight about love and marriage without sugar coating things! Her topic today may strike a nerve for some of you but please read what she says carefully then weigh in with your comments!
In my early adult years I would hear of male-female relationships labeled with different terms. Traditional, Modern and Open. Those were considered the relationship combos as far as I am concerned. Today those terms still exist today but to some not in the same context. We have managed to construct relationships in a way that gives the benefit of one term sans the return responsibility.
The relationship a la carte. I, as most of you have read, am a traditionalist in the largest sense. I believe and practice the gender roles in my relationship. But that’s just me. What works for me does not necessarily work for others. That’s cool and that’s life. However, where I see the imbalance in some is with the picking and choosing of the relationship sectors. I find that many women want the benefits of having a traditional mate, yet they themselves do not care to take on the roles of the traditional woman.. There are men that desire the modernistic woman on one hand however he wants her to regard him as the head on the other.
It is all fair? Can we have it both ways? Can you enjoy the freedom of the open relationship and still get the devotion that comes with being monogamous?
I think not. But again that is just me. I read the other day where someone declared being a modern woman yet still wanted the protection of the days of old man.
Relationships are give and take. But can one give modern and expect traditional in return. Do you think we can pick and choose what part of the relationships we want to practice and it all work out in the end?
And not just that, how many of you buy into the together but separate ways of doing. Can a couple really be together yet live separate? Can you choose what part of the relationship you want to live as a couple and what parts you don’t?
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540 comments Add your comment
AmazonRed™
May 27th, 2009
4:50 pm
LOL. I do say “OMG” “dude” and “like” a lot.
Page – I don’t think I’ve heard of this Cali picnic. For good reason. The most I’ve done is the Kappa Beach Party and the Omega Fest.
Jamoca – Call the po po h.oe!
THE INFAMOUS DK
May 27th, 2009
4:50 pm
W8 That would make a great TV show. Snitchin Strippers using the cheaters format we could have ratings gold.
Our accomplice Butterfly Cheese has lured Jaquan to the house and is now pressing him for info.
Butterfly Cheese – So wen da last time you seent Boobie nem.
Jaquan – Shid shawty I seent dem fools da otha day
Butterfly Cheese – Well shoot you get them over heah and i brang some of my Girls and we can pawdy.
Jaquan – Shid shawty BET.
Leggs
May 27th, 2009
4:50 pm
@Melo, I know who you are!
@Page, yes I know you always say that!
kimmie
May 27th, 2009
4:50 pm
Melo – U scared now?LOL!!
Melo
May 27th, 2009
4:51 pm
Barcelona 2, Man U big O
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
4:52 pm
@PG- LOL, People wont leave well enough alone. I think I was on the phone with My.02 or Jamoca when these fools tried to set me up for a carjacking last week..I saw what the were doing and let them proceed and then snapped on their azz at the last moment..When in NY I have people trying to sell me weed all of the time..lol ..Now my family they dont respect it at all…they just blaze right on up in front of me..lmao
Poppa Grande
May 27th, 2009
4:53 pm
Leggs
It is relative and also it depends on surroundings too.
My bestfriend moved here from Jamaica when he was 12. (He has some cool pictures of birthday parties with the Marleys. There is one with Rita Marley that is so cool)
When I met him, I didn’t hear the accent and didn’t believe him at first. But when he gets around other Jamaicans that accent is fierce.
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
4:54 pm
@DK-LMAO, the economy has made my job a whole lot easier..people want money
Poppa Grande
May 27th, 2009
4:54 pm
W8
I could tell that she didn’t want to call in the local FBI (after all she was on vacation), but she did.
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
4:56 pm
@Ared- you’ve been to Kappa events in the “A”? I am usually at all of those..hmmm
mytw♥tatas
May 27th, 2009
4:57 pm
JAMOCA My Zulu cosigning you prior to dissecting logic, injecting undertones & purposefully misunderestanding? Hmmph we gon have to chat about that. Must also review all of the Filthy, Infamous ones deposits before accepting donation in collection plate… then again, might be enough to keep us from goin back to scrippin
SEXXYLEGGS Did he take a bite outta that leg you been danglin’ yet?
W8’s a beat biter, dope style taker. Tell ya to ya face you ain’t nuthin but a faker!!!
AmazonRed™
May 27th, 2009
4:58 pm
you’ve been to Kappa events in the “A”? I am usually at all of those..hmmm
W8 – I was talking about the Cali events but um, yeah, I’m at quite a few of them out here too. They’re my homies and my ex is one.
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
4:58 pm
@PG- it has to be something way aggravating for me to call it in. I’m in fugitive recovery and SWAT so Im not a normal agent although I have those powers.usually we get involved when bullets are going to be exchanged..so I really do try to keep it moving unless they are just plain stupid.
Page1908
May 27th, 2009
4:59 pm
I went to a few Kappa events, too *wink*
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
4:59 pm
@my.02- there goes your whole virginal saint routine
Drink Booty Sweat!!
Leggs
May 27th, 2009
5:00 pm
Good night everyone!
@DK ~ You were very smooth!
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
5:00 pm
Looks @Page and Ared…. and decides to remain anon on this blog
Cemeeli
May 27th, 2009
5:01 pm
I don’t care what folks think.
I looove a man with a southern drawl! MY BABY has is times when when he turns it on!
Jamoca
May 27th, 2009
5:01 pm
Tatas – This quote is for you —-> This is beeeauuutiful…what is it, velvet?! (Coming to America) Lol
Ared – LMAO!..I hear that phrase so much down here, it’s a shame!…and I hate, I hate, I hate to hear —-> mens and womens!!! Ya’ dumb bish…it’s already plural, drop the dayum “s”!!! …Oh, I sorry ya’ll, had a moment there. LOL
Bonafide – I remember when that happened, that was me!…just crazy I tell ya.
DK – I’m dyin’ over here from your skit…not “pawdey”! BahahahHA!!
Tatas – Lmao!!! …and finish that song!…Git $$$…you gotta move ova…git $$$! LOL…But I love Pac’s version, sorry DIEHARD Pac fan…he’een dead ya’ll! Lol
Staceye AKA Black Mamba
May 27th, 2009
5:02 pm
MELO….your papers and skraight bruh?
INS looking for you?
W8..I attended one of your events on May 16th.
PAGE…see…now why an NY accent gotta be harsh?
AmazonRed™
May 27th, 2009
5:03 pm
and decides to remain anon on this blog
You’ve already kinda given us enuf info for me to reasonably guess who you are.
See you June 13th.
Page1908
May 27th, 2009
5:05 pm
I think I already know who you are @ -W8.
Jamoca
May 27th, 2009
5:05 pm
…and Tatas chick, don’t reject the $$ for donations, donations sounding like Mr. Clarence LOL Ya’ Zulu mayne, dun’ came to his senses!…now singing chuch songs —-> give and it will come back to youuuu, press down, shake it togetha and runnin’ ovvvvaaa… Between DK and Melo…we str8 <—that was for Zulu! LOL
Leggs
May 27th, 2009
5:05 pm
I tried, but wasn’t successful!
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
5:08 pm
@Page- You probably do..uh ohhhhh..lol
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
5:09 pm
@jamoca- “Bonafide – I remember when that happened, that was me!…just crazy I tell ya.”
Sorry about that..lol
AmazonRed™
May 27th, 2009
5:09 pm
Your “secret” is safe with us W8. Us Cali girls are cool like that. LOL
Page1908
May 27th, 2009
5:10 pm
LOL this may be the first time you have seen me post. I used to more a long time ago.
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
5:11 pm
@Staceye- Hmm you also..i have to start going into my mental rolodex now
Page1908
May 27th, 2009
5:11 pm
LOL ARed..totally rad Cali girls lmao. *looking at -W8* lol
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
5:15 pm
@Page.Ared- AWKWARD!!!! (like Derwin says on “the game”)
Jamoca
May 27th, 2009
5:16 pm
Bonafide – Sorry…Naw dude, that’s cool…don’t matter who as long as ya’ handle the business first —> your safety. No need to dig in that mental rollie for meh’ …potnah yee’oun know me! LOL
G’nite you all.
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
5:16 pm
awkward awkward awkward
AmazonRed™
May 27th, 2009
5:18 pm
LOL. W8, you sent a pic around to folks. I don’t think you really care about being “outted”
Page1908
May 27th, 2009
5:22 pm
LOL -W8, omg it’s not awkward. Who cares? Are you on FB?
Leggs
May 27th, 2009
5:25 pm
Shouldn’t be awkward, unless you perpeerrrtrating up in this camp!
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
5:27 pm
@Leggs- Im real and Im sure Page can vouch for that along with a few others on here that know me
@Page- yeah I am on FB
@Ared- yeah i just didnt see that coming though..lol
-W8©
May 27th, 2009
5:29 pm
It’s funny because you read how people type and express themselves then you find out you are in the same circles then it’s a big old party cuz you already know them..lol
Page1908
May 27th, 2009
5:29 pm
Ok, -W8…email me so you can send me a FR. I’m at pageantgirl_1908 on hoo hoo.
AmazonRed™
May 27th, 2009
5:33 pm
It’s funny because you read how people type and express themselves then you find out you are in the same circles then it’s a big old party cuz you already know them..lol
Yeah. I’ve been “outted” several times by people. Like Leggs said, I’m not fronting, so it’s easy to know which one is me. That’s why I laugh when people just think I’m making my life out to be a fairy tale. Nope, I kicks it and I have fun too.